Avoided all the Easter shite and spent the day painting, doing washing, watching that Football Italia doc and now watching British Superbikes.
Fucking lovely.
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Avoided all the Easter shite and spent the day painting, doing washing, watching that Football Italia doc and now watching British Superbikes.
Fucking lovely.
Meanwhile @Waffdon what you playing at? https://twitter.com/10candan/status/...983989761?s=21
'10 can dan' is a great name.
I'm sure @John has a friend with a similar name. :sherlock:
Decent memory. He's just called Ten Cans though because he once turned up to a night out stone sober and claimed to have had ten cans before coming out.
That's not him.
Going to a gin festival. :drool:
Is that lad Waffelz?
Supposed to be heading down to the sisters to head out but her fiance's dickhead mate, who was originally supposed to be away, is going to be about. Bag of cans and a VP4 marathon it is so :cool:
Seeing the folks and that's about it. Went to see them on Tuesday but they weren't in. :moop:
In Milan to watch Inter-Juve tonight. We got stung yesterday near the station buying a "large beer" for €20 each. Christ.
How large are we talking? Because if it’s anything less than a pitcher I’d be going full Milwall lads on tour on the gaff.
A stein size i.e. 2 pinter
I’d probably only smash a couple of windows then.
And they served up some Aldi pizza as part of the package for €15. Wounded.
Napoli have got this :cool:
Cities are good for gouging but that's up near Denmark levels.
Was 12 pubs this saturday. Possibly the best so far, though nobody got cunted and did anything stupid this year sadly. Everyone paced themselves and a few of us actually bemoaned how sober we were at pub 9. Managed to get my pal from Edinburgh to come down for it, as well as 3 mates from London and 1 from Sheffield. Probably about 50 people got involved over the day, and about 25 managed all 12. Here is a shit photo from pub 8 (7.50pm ish)
https://scontent-lht6-1.xx.fbcdn.net...91&oe=5B900D28
I'm gonna bully Boydy to come next year.
My personal highlight was my mate bringing a Kazakh girl he met on match.com as his plus one, and me telling him in private that I'd chatted briefly to the same girl on the same website :D I was actually worried she was a catfish because her responses were quite crap so I was a bit annoyed when she turned up and was fucking well hot. I don't think she recognised me.
That tramp on the left must have been a bit confused as to what was going on.
Ed Balls and Eddie Jordan look like they're enjoying themselves.
I used to work with a Kazakh girl. She was passable.
Bloke who organises 12 pubs uploaded the photos. Here are a couple of favourites:
Pub 2:
https://scontent-lht6-1.xx.fbcdn.net...3b&oe=5B9D861C
Pub 5:
https://scontent-lht6-1.xx.fbcdn.net...4a&oe=5B92E7D5
I think we should organise a TTH 12 pubs. Anyone fancy it?
That would just be a gear fest.
The state of that guy on the extreme left and then right, not to mention Mr suit and hat.
Tth 12 pubs 🤙
Did any of the fellas fuck any of the lasses? Or not that sort of party?
Couple of blacks and a tranny too.
The ginger?
Could do a TTH Ale Trail. You get the train from Manchester to Huddersfield. Every stop along the way has a pub on it.
Nice of you to take your dad along.
Maldives would be nice this time of year.
I'm with Quince.
£5 a pint or higher. Kiko special.
Wine bar. Wouldn't know a pint if he got one across the head.
Pints. :lol:
Pints of white wine. Last one to get the tie round their head and do a Fat Sam in Marbella gets the round in.
I'm gardening.
https://media1.tenor.com/images/0caf...7169/tenor.gif
Been out in various London parks all weekend. Had some friends over from NYC so hung out with them for a couple of days and then had a picnic in Regent's Park earlier today. Excellent stuff.
Yeah! Fuck hanging out with friends!
I played football again today so it was the third in three days. Caught the sun on my face and burned the back of my legs.
Had a roast and pizza today as well which is all out win.
Shame you can't get Portuguese skin.
He’s meant to be Italian. Manchester has fucked him right up.
Bams from Essex you mug
Fucking shit weekend this week.
Our Gaff is a 2/3 bed, so we have had the main bedroom as a lounge since we moved in and a separate dining room down the other end. With another baby on the way (should it give consent to being born) we’re now converting the lounge to our bedroom, the dining room to our lounge, our old room to our daughters room and her room to the new baby’s room.
Had to collapse the dining table and wardrobe’s to move them, the sofa has fucked the door way getting it through and I’ve just taken a plug socket off the wall.
Off down the pub for some lunch now. Fuck this.
I’ve just been for a walk on my dinner hour. :)
@dino make a thread for the Eurovision tonight please, mate.
Gardening. Burnt.
Some weather. BBQ and Grey Goose la la la
Went out to an art exhibition earlier (some Ralph Steadman stuff), had lunch at a Portuguese cafe (along with Pastel de nata :drool:) and am going out for beers/to a gig later
Just ordered a Chicken Bhuna hoagie. :drool:
Red-eye flight last night. Now I'm in London till June 16, five minutes from Stamford Bridge. Hit me up TTHers.
I'd never heard that use of the term red-eye before (here it means the first flight in the morning). Here maybe extremely localised in that context.
Went to London Zoo today with wife+child, which was decent despite starting raining at 12:30 and having not stopped still. Am now in a hotel on my tod as I have a training course tomorrow at County Hall.
Doing a ten mile run in Richmond Park tomorrow. Longest distance I've ever done so going to take it easy.
Last game of the football season today and we were involved in a 3-3 draw with the champions. I was rinsed by their winger loads.
Look at Keeks setting up the reasons why he can’t meet up with Spoons again.
Me and spoons will meet.
The hit ups are flying in.
Long way to travel for a booty call.
@mahow
I'm not giving you more tee hee material. Fuck the group.
Who's mahow?
Boydy I think.
Out in London after the play off final (which was absolute dross). Ended up in tiger tiger and pleased to say I still have it. Cherpsed a 23 yr old lass.
I love chatting up women. :drool:
Been at Disney since Thursday. Staying in a log cabin (kitted out with modern amenities) and hitting the parks. Was hot as fuck yesterday but cooled off today. Fun but not worth the $$
Have you taken children with you? If so, what age. Someone I know took a 1 year old, which seems kinda pointless.
No kids :drool: I have seen a lot of those people and wonder what the point is. I told the missus the kids will be 10 before I entertain the idea.
I have never been despite living here 12 years (been to Euro Disney) and the missus is turning 30 so we figured why not. The rides are shit compared to Universal or Cedar Point but it’s been fun and now everyone can stop being shocked when I say I haven’t been to the one here.
The free buses around the place and the late bars in “downtown Disney” have been particularly enjoyable.
Any tasty ladies?
Lots. 90+ degree weather helps too :lol:
Was the wife also picking out ones you might like?
Nah, don’t pay her enough
Going to Disney as an adult, alone (or at least sans children), baffles me, and should probably see you on some sort of register somewhere. I've a friend who's parents live out there half the year and they have an annual pass type thing. Is that area really so bad that going in to Disneyland is the best option? I do vaguely recall Orlando being post-apocalypse level dreadful when I had to venture in to some OCP style police headquarters having 'lost' my passport at some all you can eat pizza shithole on International Drive. Fuck the sheriff and fuck the fucking counties.
I'm taking the kids (6,4,2) to the French one in the summer. Dear god have mercy on my soul.
I used to work with a girl who only Holidays at Disney. She got engaged there, married there, and when their marriage fell apart 6 months later I’d be surprised if she didn’t get divorced there. She had Disney tattoos, stationery and clothing/accessories. She’d also sit at her desk singing the songs and refer to herself as a Princess.
If I could kick anyone in the cunt, it’d be her.
So she was autistic. Got it.
I'm sure International Drive is not as bad as what you're portraying. Although it has been some time since I've been there.
I did take an ex to Disneyland Paris when we were 20 yrs old. Really enjoyed it at the time, but probably wouldn't do it now until my son is old enough to appreciate it.
Also, I remember telling a work colleague that I went to Thorpe Park (I was 30 at the time). He claimed I was too old to be going. But he does like French cinema and art museums, so...
She’s probably neatly in the intersection.
:D
Never done a cruise, but people I know love them. Do them year after year. They're not cheap tho.
I like the idea of getting to see different places with a cruise. But not sure I like the idea of being on a boat for 2 weeks.
Cruises just sound unimaginably awful. Why be locked up on a boat with a bunch of idiots for however long it goes on for.
You're in close proximity to idiots on every holiday.
Cruises are probably alright if you can get off and go and see stuff, to an extent.
The Disney cruise, though, just sounds unimaginably awful.
I love the whole Disney, Universal thing. I think they do it really well and as a child I remember thinking it was amazing. I'd like my children to enjoy the same experience.
But, just looked up a Disney cruise. Not for me thanks. Part of Disney is to go to the theme park.
Also think Giggles comment rings true. If you're in a on all inclusive resort, you'll probably spend 90% of your time in the resort...seeing the same people, like you would on a cruise.
I'd never go on an all-inclusive either. Much rather go out exploring and finding cool local places.
If I could afford it I would only go on cruises. You spend less time on the boat than you would at a hotel because a there’s somewhere new to look around every day.
I've been on one cruise, it was great.
Spikey is right about them.
Cruises look like the worst possible way to spend a vacation. All-inclusive resorts follow right behind.
It depends what you want. I like going exploring in a new city and all that but it can be a bit stressful at times. I can see the appeal of going to an all-inclusive resort or on a cruise and just relaxing for a week or two and not having to worry about anything. Especially if you have kids. Send them along to the kids' club or whatever and just relax/get drunk by the pool.
A cruise is half way between an All Inclusive and a City Break. All the food and drink you want on board but with new surroundings to explore every day. But yeah, it won’t be for everyone just as hopping between Eastern European shit holes won’t be. Personally I can’t think of anything worse than Bora Bora or any other ‘beautiful island’. There’s only so long I can look at a pretty beach for.
I would like to do the Atlantic crossing to New York by boat at some point in my life. I'm not remotely arsed about New York (the old man went recently and said it was a toilet), but the boats interest me.
My mates in New York at the moment. He text me this before:
#muglifeQuote:
It’s just surreal as you’ve seen it on tv all your life.. was in Times Square yesterday with all the lights and yellow cabs and you just stand there looking around for 5 minutes. Asked a seller how much a pretzel was and he said $4 so paid him.. walked 20 yards down the road and there’s multiple signs on the others saying pretzels for $1.. got mugged off like the tourist I am. Was fuminggggg
Expensive tho.. $8 for a beer or a Guinness
I don’t remember Dublin being that expensive. Was about 5€ a pint I think. A bit more than here, but it’s a Capital. There’s pubs in London taking deposits on glasses.
We’re going back 3 or 4 years and I don’t remember the prices exactly, just that they weren’t shocking. We did go to Temple Bar and I remember being offended by the amount of Americans, Stew and Self-stereotyping bands, so we only stayed for one. After that we were around the ‘river’ and mostly drank in the hotel bar, which was here.
We will go back, but would want to stay in another part of the city. The problem is I have no idea where’s good, where’s not and what to do other than drink and listen to a tuneless chancers.
Dublin is very small so it wouldn't matter where you stayed. But go to Cork or Limerick instead.
What Giggsey said. Dublin is tiny for a capital. 3 day weekend was more than enough for me. Still, nice place.
@Lewis, if you ever make it we'll meet up and lol at the Magics of the world while we eat a crap hot dog.
That sounds a bit too similar to our Skype sessions to be worth re-creating in an actual meet.
We'll do a Mahow and pay $500 to eat some shit hot dogs made by a celebrity chef instead then.
Noted.
My old man was in the casino tonight and heard me sniffing gear in the toilet. Great start to the weekend.
£180 up though so all good.
How fucking loud were you sniffing? :D
I seen him earlier in the night after work and he was on my phone and I got a text about dropping stuff off. He must have seen it and got curious.
Bad mong you.
What’s the going rate in Glasgow, John? :^]
For what?
Cocaine. You get pills cheaper here than Frosty Jacks now :D
Proper, council, 50/50?
I’m £50 for 2/1. £100 normally for pure.
Pure. :D
How many sets of hands do you think that's been through since it left the jungle?
Got some men in this weekend, switching out the standard polycarbonate conservatory roof and putting in a properly insulated [rubber] tiled one. Also having a radiator installed tomorrow and then plastered on Wednesday. Should be loads better after it. Expensive though!
Meanwhile the missus is out on the piss in Liverpool all day. :moop: I’m just gonna play God Of War in-between watching the football.
If it’s not raining on Monday I’ll go for a bike ride and have a few pints at the pub, at least.
How much is the new roof costing Baz? We could do with doing that.
£3650.
Next doors was cheaper (just under £3k afaik) but it looks garb and they left the old roof in, which will just lead to damp problems in a few years, according to my extensive research. My blokes have taken them out (I’m hoping they dispose of them for me :cab: ) and are replacing them with plasterboard (i think) double-wrapped in insulation foil, then another plasterboard to plaster over and fit six spotlights, and some old recycled tyres-cum-roof tiles on the outside. Oh and new guttering. So price includes plasterer and electrician.
That is fairly cheap you nutbag. I had a quote at my old house for the same thing; 7k. It was a big conservatory but I decided to buy a new house instead.
Yeah, ours is narrow but long (it’s the kitchen) so expect it would be closer to Quince’s. It’s just so fucking hot in there when the sun’s out and it’s loud as fuck when it rains. Back of a long list of shit that needs doing though.
I heard two blokes doing cocaine in the toilet of a barbecue place the other week. It was about half-seven. Why?
Hopefully the weekend brings, in this order:
Exeter
Real Madrid
Ricciardo
Exeter
It's never acceptable unless you're a complete dickhead.
Which is the intersect of both those circles.
Some of my mates can't do a night out without it. And this is things like having a few pints. Sad really.
No sadder than not being able to do a night out without drink. I'd say a little less sad, actually, because when you start drinking on every night out you're in full ownership of your faculties, by the time the gear comes out you're about four pints deep and already in a somewhat altered state.
I forgot the new train of thought was drink is as bad as drugs :rolleyes: It's like being on twitter.
Is being an alcoholic any better than being a coke addict? If so, how?
It's a slippery slope and this is the natural end result of being too careless and refusing to moderate ya bullshit.
I loved MD at uni, a couple of older wiser friends told me to ration it because there's a finite number of times you can do it before it "loses the magic". I was like yeah sound WHATEVER MATE and just did it virtually every other weekend, cus it was fun. Now there's practically no point in doing it because it doesn't really do anything anymore. If I'd been smart about it I probably could have done it three or four times a year indefinitely.
Coke is a bit scarier because it's quite moreish, and cus it hasn't got the same horrible come downs it's far easier to be tempted into having a CHEEKY LINE on a really low-key night at the pub, barbeque, whatever the fuck it is that Waff does at the weekend etc. It can be easy to fall into the trap of seeing it as a enhancer of all drinking occasions, and I also know a few people who have a shit time and seem super disappointed if they go on a night out and it doesn't materialise. I think it can be a fun thing if limited to special occasions, and it's sufficiently prohibitively expensive for that to be quite easy for me. If i won the lottery i'd be dead within a fortnight though.
Beer is delicious though. Is cocaine?
Anyway alcohol isn't a drug, it's a drink.
I think it's difficult to gauge them against each other, and it's all contextual. What's worse, having the odd pint or having the odd line? Not sure. What's worse, having a "bit of a coke problem" or a "bit of a booze problem"? Fuck knows. Being a full on addict of either would also be equally fucking shit.
The one obvious advantage being a heavy boozer over being a heavy coke user is the variables of not necessarily knowing what nasty shit your gear is being mixed with, and I can vouch for that after thinking I was going to have a heart attack after a heavy night on gear which turned out to be probably as much speed as it was good old fashioned Colombian shit.
You're also funding fucking horrible drug wars/cartels by buying coke, you're not with alcohol.
Methadone isn’t a drug, it’s a drink.
Having the odd pint = having the odd line
Yeah I don't think so.
'Nights out' are all shit anyway.
Ya that’s cuz u suck lolz
You wouldn't be funding gangs if we could become adults about drugs and regulate it. Great bit of dough for the government and by definition you reduce crime.
I don't really care too much if people want to do it but I don't get the buzz of doing it when you're having a beer with no plans to stay out for the duration.
We'll get a right MELTDOWN when some middle class London whitey gets stabbed in a drug argument.
'Rich/Will/Sam, who hoped to become a journalist...'
It's so commonplace that it's probably just because most people are arseholes.
Maybe but pretty much anyone I've known who likes it regularly has been a bit of a prick.
It is the wankers drug of choice.
It’s the most common drug by far. Everyone’s on it. From police to nurses.
You're sounding a bit Morrissey.
Weed is by far the most common.
The whole "coke is for/turns people into wankers" thing definitely has roots in reality, but it's massively overstated. Most blokes I know who dabble are pretty sound on it, but it might be that all my friends are neurotic introspective nerds, so have sufficiently crippling self-awareness that they make a massive effort to not be annoying gobshites.
I actually go into my shell a bit more and talk LESS bollocks when i've had a few lines.
From my own experiences (albeit shaped by the kind of circles I move in, daddio), crusty posh cunts on acid are far more tedious than people on coke. But then posh crusties are the worst people in the world.
One of my best friends has a little gang of friends that are all public-school educated, do that thing of referring to each other by their surnames, listen to nothing but shit 60s psychedelic music and spend every summer going to one of the gang's holiday home in the south of france to do acid and "jam". Honestly I hate those cunts more than anyone I've met on coke, including a bloke who tried to punch me "for a laugh".
They play sitars and one of them dresses like a cartoon pirate fuck I hate them so much.
Aye I agree, there's definitely a certain kind of twat that fits the coke cliche, but yeah they're nobs already. People like Dapper Laughs, all bantz lads jagerbombs etc. I think both the biggest strength and weakness of coke is that it isn't a standalone event of a drug - doing mdma or something like that sorta dominates your evening whereas coke just enhances what you're already doing. It sorta contradicts what I said earlier in the thread, but if you put it on a pedestal and expect it to really MAKE a night you're gonna be disappointed. Whereas if you're already having a decent night and someone unexpectedly offers you a line it's a great bonus.
Best coke is someone else's coke, ennit.
Haha, nah I genuinely don't get it. Squandering the advantages you've had in life to just spaz around is something I can definitely identify with, but it's a whole subculture that I just can't see the appeal of.
Have you ever experimented with naughty chemicals, Lew, out of interest?
The opportunity hasn't really come up.
What a meet that would be.
Off on a bank holiday bike ride with a rare appearance from @Baz today. Along with regular bike riders The Reid and my Dad.
There’s a plan to leave one of our final TTH business cards in the pub. :cool2:
The weather has been ridiculous in Scotland all weekend. Best couple of bank holidays in living memory.
Overtime done. Step out into an overcast, muggy haze. :moop: Yesterday was bang on.
Bike ride was boiling!
Had three pints sat in the sun though.
Absolutely roasting the last few days. Left the office at 4 so I could mooch along to a park in the city and babe watch like a pervert.
Bar the hottie with her husband, it's been a bust.
Went to a pretty crap house party on Saturday. It started at FOUR, so it attracted a lot of bed wetters who wanted to drink 2 kopperbergs then go home. so me and my lil entourage of wannabe wreckheadz were pretty much the last men standing by about 1am.
Somewhat amusingly I took home a girl I'd not spoken to or seen since I took her home from the same house party a year previously, but I wasn't really feeling it. We booked the taxi after making out as our American cousins would describe it, but almost as soon as it arrived I found the prospect of staying up late chatting bollocks with THE LADS appealed far more than shagging this girl. Oh well.
Classic bike festival on Sunday. I fancy popping down just to gawp at it.
Out for tea at one of those all you can eat meat places tonight with the “traffic light” cards (green for FEED ME MORE, red for whoa now) which always start off amazing and then by two pieces of meat in, I’ve had enough and wanna sleep. Can’t wait for the first fifteen minutes though. :drool:
Brazilian BBQ? Those are amazing.
I'm also not sure if they're always as liberal with meats or if they saw my size and assumed I could put away a lot. Whatever it was, I appreciated it.
Yep. You know it’s good when this is the logo:
http://brunosrodizio.co.uk/media/1057/logo.png
Took the Fiat to the track today. Second session was under the rain. Beasted everyone on the wet. :drool:
The best thing about Rodizio is the salad bar. And I don't say that as a limp wristed vegan. It's just that it's magnificent :drool:
Hurling is the gift that keeps on giving, and fucking taking.
Went to Sheffield for my mate's 33rd (old cunt) birthday. Us two plus another 3 pals had a few beers in his garden, few in this proper good aley old man type pub then went to corporation. Had no idea it was a "rock night", just knew it was a famous (infamous?) big studenty club, so it was greb central :wub:
Wasted a fair amount of time hanging out with this little group of 20 year old girls cus one of them kept giggling and making sure to reiterate she had a boyfriend whilst increasingly flirting with me, and it took me until p much closing time to realise she wasn't going to shag me. They were all fairly sound though.
Once it closed I did my usual trick of bringing randos back to my mate's house for an "afterparty", including this proper gothy girl with the most magnificent tits i'd ever seen. Me, one of my mates and these grebby randos stayed up until about 1pm, and despite huge tit girl's boyfriend being there she had been increasingly flirty and talking about "trying new things in relationships". Had our other friend not woken up at 1 and told us we had to leave immediately I'd have probably been given several more lines and had an incredibly awkward threesome with big tits and her obviously not into it boyfriend. I'm not sure which would have been better.
Either way I don't actually feel that awful.
I'd love to hear the other people involved in these stories perceptions.
At what point in this story do Hammer and Igor fuck?
Igor, girls with boyfriends who are flirtatious anyway absolutely love when you give them the time of day you should know that. So they'll push it as much as they can to get a bit of attention. Just stay clear from the off.
Been down in Glasgow this weekend and its not as bad as I previously thought. There's definitely a fair few roasters, but it's definitely not the complete shit hole I'd previously labelled it.
Glasgow folk are the best in the world if you don’t mention football. Even then, all fun and games.
This one surely caused GS to call an emergency meeting of his brigade.
I just got invited to a networking/drinks event at the opening of a high tech car wash :cab:
https://i.imgur.com/k6hUpUx.png
Wear your new trainers.
They obviously needed a tramp to do the windscreens, make sure you bring a squeegee.
And a colourful bow tie.
:drool:
https://i.imgur.com/hJo9mYw.jpg
What's the bright red stuff? That looks quality. Might have to get a mixed kebab myself tonight now.
Its red donner meat, its a Northern speciality (well, mainly Bury). It adds different spices into the mix.
The old wive'stale is it hides condemned meat but all the local places that do it would've been shut down years back if so.
The lamb tikka is incredible. £7 the lot.
No idea what it is but I want it.
My place does a similar thing, though presumably bigger because it comes in a twelve inch pizza box, for eight quid. If I get one for tea tonight I'll put a picture up.
The shit that passes as food over there. :harold:
It's worth trying, never looks too picturesque but tastes amazing.
I was going to insult Mexican food in retort but I can't because it's the business.
Is it just different meats mixed together with some sort of mayo based sauce on top?
They do sell stuff like that over here. I've tried a few times an it is ok, although it looks a bit more... refined I guess.
Nobody would pretend it isn’t shit. But it’s shit in the same way those ‘All You Can Eat’ feasts are over there. You know it’s the lowest quality produce. You know it’ll leave your skin as greasy as Mahows beards. You know the sauce and spices are there to hide the truth from you. But FOR FUCK SAKE IT TASTES GOOD.
Pepe you're a fucking disgrace
"Have a coffee whilst our technicians take 20 minutes to do a three minute job." In relation to the poncy car wash.
You fuckers lolled at the L&L picture i posted but then suck each others dicks off over what looks to be roadkill
Because they know it ain't about how it looks. Pimp that shit up all you want, gimme some filthy donner and lamb tikka in a naan and I'll bitchslap you for even presenting your atrocities.
Plus hoagies are for cuckolds.
The sauce is the one thing I disagree with on DS' meal. You want one of the yoghurt based spicy pakora sauces for that at a minimum, but preferably the spiciest available kebab sauce.
I can't remember what F&F stood for but I remember the picture as being some nonsense in a styrofoam tub.
I can't handle much spice/heat so I go for mayo. Love garlic mayo but the stuff from there is piss weak.
I fucking love mayo. Reminds me of the tranny banging days.
Back on the Cigars this weekend after having a little break.
Any of you blokes dabble?
Cigars :sick:
The smell is fucking vile.
The worst thing about Vegas is that so many dickheads were smoking them around the place.
Well there are levels to cigars just like booze. I smoke in the privacy of my own home, sometimes having one with my brother.
You are right though Bris Vegas has fuck heads smoking stale bottle shop sticks(lol) in public not at all realising what utter cunts they are to everyone else.
I love the smell of cigars. Hate smoking them.
Cigars are great.
John :drool:
I can feel my arteries tightening just looking at it :drool:
Fucking have some of that @Pepe.
When we went to Cuba we went to a factory that makes Rum and Cigars. Some fat Canadian Mahow asked if the cigars were still rolled on the thighs of a virgin, the geezer said that ‘there are no virgins left in Cuba. Communism ruined them as it ruined everything else.’
This was interesting for 2 reasons. Firstly, he had a picture of his teenage daughter he showed off when we got on the coach, so this now seemed like an admission of noncing her. Secondly, I assume he was disappeared that very evening.
I'm off down the country for a match at 2 tomorrow then back to Dublin for a piss up for a lad that left work a month ago, and back in to Croke Park in Sunday. Dying a death presumably.
Rum and cigars. :drool:
There was an old documentary about cigars on BBC4 a few weeks ago, and, with the exception of Lew Grade, all of the famous smokers they interviewed were clearly only doing it because they thought that's what rich people and jazz aficionados were meant to.
That looks very dry.
It isn't particularly, but it comes with two sauces on the side anyway.
i am going out in shoreditch tomorrow for the first time i feel like i will either have lots of fun or a really really shit time
You’ll be surrounded by you’s. Take that whichever way you feel appropriate.
If you've grown that orange beard back they'll welcome you as one of their own. You'll be getting your feet out in coffee shops by month's end.
Pretty sure everyone in Shoreditch is clean shaven now.
Taches must be due a comeback at some point.
I never heard of Shoreditch before but TTH has offered a great service to me by making sure I never ever go there.
I can pull a mustache off better than a full beard, to be fair. Made worse by the fact grey's sneaked into my stubble.
Embrace the grey.
I'm fine with it on my head. It looks distinguished. In my beard it just looks scruffy.
Yeah that is fair.
I would like to clarify that I am a man who has a beard, rather than a "beard man". The whole pseudo-subculture, beard-as-personality thing is tedious and I refuse to be tarred with the same brush, you cunts. On balance I'd rather have the occasional spacker beard-bro give me a high five saying "nice beard man!", than look like a 14 year old.
I can't make any excuses for the rest of my personality, though.
That's what they all tell themselves. Give us your top ten Ron Swanson quotes you epic cunt.
Maybe I should double-down and just embrace being a cunt.
I'll get one of those t-shirts you see advertised (not you specifically) on facebook with ultra specific things on the back like "I AM A BEARD GUY FROM WARWICKSHIRE I WAS BORN IN DECEMBER I LIKE MY INDIE MUSIC TWEE AND MY WOMEN TO HAVE CRIPPLINGLY LOW SELF-ESTEEM AND IF YOU DON'T LIKE THAT I'LL DO FUCK ALL BECAUSE I'M A COWARD", with a few eagles and american flags thrown in.
'Respect the Beard'.
Slogan tees are the fucking worst. I saw one the other day with 'Death Before Decaf' on it. There's no quicker or more effective way to out yourself as a tit.
I sometimes get given them and just use them as pyjamas.
I just got given a belter (and I normally only ever wear plain T-shirts) which is the peppa pig logo only the text says death grips. :cool: he ordered it from America though so it’s frickin’ MASSIV.
Never trust a man with no facial hair.
Bull shit. Every good disguise includes facial hair. Bunch of fucking frauds.
It's those cleanly shaven mother fuckers I don't trust.
avin a tinny in the front room as my mum watches a work training video on her laptop about invoicing orders. why the fuck am i getting a train to stupid london, this is the life
also, thoughts on train beers, lads? i feel like it doesn't make me look (more like) a deviant on the 7pm to Euston on a Saturday in clothes obviously picked for getting my boogie on, right??
If you're worrying what the people on the train will think of your outfit then you definitely need the beers.
oh no i've no worries about my threads daddio, just wondering if it's socially acceptable to be necking a can of lager on the train. i was just hoping the fact i'm wearing clothes obviously picked for a night out was something of an extra mitigating factor.
At worst you'll look like a tramp who jumped the gates.
You’ll look a right scummy cunt.
So why not have a couple of cans to take the edge off? :henn0rz:
The very first tinder date I went on, after three years of involuntary celibacy, I got so nervous I necked a whole four pack of Stella on the train on an empty stomach in my dishevelled work clothes. It went as well as you can probably guess.
Ive put it on a 90 degree wash and intensive dry cycle. :yn:
This reminds me though, what’s happened to @Offshore Toon?
I think we just had a minor earthquake - or ghostquake - up here.
It was probably just Rio Ferdinands tantrum because he could have done better than the Tyson fight.
Didn't realise my seats today were so close to the front and never brought suncream for my head. Burnt to absolute bits.
http://i64.tinypic.com/2lsz80m.png
Sunburn :lol:
I had a month of borderline problematic chemical usage, and was quite looking forward to the vanilla evening i had planned - hanging out with a little gang of fairly dorky old school friends, have a few drinks, then call it a night. I even, very optimistically, booked an advance train ticket for 11.50 from euston this morning. Told the anecdote of my irresponsible behaviour the previous weekend involving excess coke usage, and one of the ladies in our gang surreptitiously messaged me saying "fancy getting some tonight". Just two pints in spoons + my train tinny was already enough to break my resistance, and I immediately left the pub to phone my London man, and within half an hour i was waiting by a sketchy block of flats before getting into a car with 3 scary latino blokes to pick up.
Was meant to go back to house of girl who lives 20 mins from euston, ended up in fucking CROYDON doing lines with my mate and her boyfriend until about 9am. I just got home after the most fucking ghastly overground-overground-tube-train journey that took about 3 hours, and haven't been to sleep since 7am yesterday.
What a fucking spacker. Maybe me and phonics need a joint TTH intervention.
Get fucked, we need the drama. Too many Norms these days.
Was it GAA you were watching? I watched about ten minutes of it last night and it seems to be a complete mess of a sport. The goals are almost pointless because the aim appears to be get within about 50-60 yards of the goal in some space and smash it high trough the posts. It'd be like awarding Tony pulls the rule book to football.
Seems really popular though. Do they basically force it on you in school?
I've been off it for a while, but I think it's highly unlikely I'll be able to make it through a month of world cup related day drinking without succumbing to the urge to get the coke in.
What we really need is a good old rivalry. Someone petty enough to follow the other from thread to thread kicking off. Sadly you all killed Harold and Henry’s stuck in the first stage of grief.
Surely I'll get offended by something soon, don't worry Spikey-san.
So Friday the supporters group i joined for Orlando City is throwing this benefit event... gonna be a "Masquerade Ball"... I've ordered this mask:
https://images-na.ssl-images-amazon....0L._UX679_.jpg
I was at Burlington (kinda like a TJ(TK?) Maxx but bigger and a little better variety of stuff) and saw this pink suit jacket made by Tommy Hilfiger so I've decided to basically go full Miami Vice:
http://www.asuitthatfits.com/offthec...3/06/mv_01.jpg
I've got white dress shoes too lol Gonna be ridiculous. I'll try and post pics.
Fucking hell.
:) Exactly.
Cool mask, for what it is.
I'm surprised people still do coke. I would have thought coke and drugs would have evolved and there would be some new type of wave that people would use to get them where they want to go.
I’ve read that 3 times and still have no idea what that means.
A literal wave that transports people.
Drugs are sick, why would you ever get rid of them
Cocaine is still very popular. Why hasn't it been replaced with some new super drug? Its decades old now isn't it?
Sincere do you think that all cocaine in existence was created 30 years ago and it's been slowly going bad over the years?
I'd say he means it's been around decades.
Yeah, still what?’
I give up
If someone comes up with some super cocaine I'm sure it'll take off, for now it's a perfectly enjoyable substance
It's cause coke is ... i don't wanna say it but... RELATIVELY harmless compared to oh idk... anything else but weed.
Crack is seriously addictive though
First of all, cocaine has been around a lot longer than a few decades. And it hasn't been 'replaced' because there's a huge infrastructure behind it making a ton of money, just like lots of other industries. I might invent the best damned lemonade you've ever tasted but if I'm just making it in my shed then I'm not replacing coca cola any time soon.
Cocaine is readily available, easy to take, and people are familiar with it. It would take a lot to replace it with something may not be any of those things.
Great pitch.
Fuck it I'm sold. Where do I invest?
vCash only.
Yeah okay it’s been around for a century, but it’s a pretty solid product. If it lasted much longer it wouldn’t be such a casual thing, which is a big selling point
Munster hurling final Sunday, nothing beats it :drool:
My mate is getting married at the weekend.
The invite says to give them money for their honeymoon by way of a gift, if we feel like it.
What's the procedure for this? He earns loads of money so I know he doesn't need it, but he is probably paying a decent whack for me to be there. Do I just chuck him a hundred quid (from two of us) or something? Am I a cunt if I don't?
I would. Just put it in a card.
When you say weekend, do you mean Saturday afternoon?
Gave money to my cousin when he got married a few weeks ago.
Also, in Poland its standard to give flowers at a wedding (fuck knows why) and he asked for guests to give a bottle of wine or a book instead.
A book? Was he marrying Henry?
Yeah I'm not sure why, I also thought they'd get mainly wine but he said it was about 50/50.
If not, there's always tvcatchup in the toilet.
I once saw a wedding invitation with the people's bank account and sort code number on it. Deposit the coins straight in.
Put a fiver in, and then another five in pound/two pound coins.
I thought the England game was the evening kick off. Nope, it's at three. Fuck.
If anyone I knew got married during an England world cup game id tell them to get fucked. New friendships can always be made, it coming home can only happen once every four years, two including euros.
League cricket on Saturday is going to be brilliant. They've given us dispensation to have a tea break that lasts the duration of the game, but that in itself will be chaos. My lot have held up pretty well but I bet some teams will have to play with 7 and all sorts.
I remember playing cricket through England v Scotland in Euro 96, which was a bit of a bummer.
There's no time to postpone it to. Has to be on Saturday afternoons and the other ones all have other league rounds. So we get on with it like true Englishmen.
Plus it is just a game of football, it's pretty simple to watch it later.
Especially now that the games have thinned out.
There’s a bus load of us going to an 18 hole Footgolf course tomorrow leaving at 10. Not sure what state we’ll be in by the time the back 9 comes around but should be a laugh.
There’s no way they let your sort on a golf course.
Looks quite posh too. Just outside Edinburgh. Only £2 to rent a golf cart so I’m thinking putting the beer on that with a ice cooler.
I just got a spam text from Dominos asking if I want a large pepperoni pizza. It's half ten in the morning lads.
https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-scotla...itics-44829539
Tell him we said hi.
gonna do some hoovering and washing now lads
257 exam questions left to mark, so that's my Saturday. Will be gla to get it done and not have it hanging over me anymore.
My wife finished yesterday as that was the deadline. Are you sure you haven't missed it?
Croke Park later, will be fucking rammed though.
Avoiding town like the plague today. Hopefully someone interrupts Corbin's speech again or the miners decide to get on with their lives. Or bother from the England game spills into the crowd.
by complete chance i also ended up playing footgolf today. good laugh, and my mate hit a stunning hole in one.
I like the idea of Footgolf but my knee wouldn’t allow it. Maybe a Spikey Vs DS Paralympics version, but that’s about it.
Going drinking with @Baz and two of our mates this afternoon. Can’t wait!
Football golf is a fun game. I always nearly end up fighting with man though. It's that competitive.
:cool:
Did that nail someone in the crowd?
That sport is what happens if Vince McMahon liked Hockey.
Got totally trashed on Saturday and sent the most graphic booty call fb message to a girl I was once involved with romantically. Fuck sake. I even messaged the Romanian. Wish phones came with breathalysers lol!!
I met up with a mate who I see about once a month for the purpose of getting drunk together, and he told me he's basically an alcoholic now. I'm not hugely surprised, but I suppose we're going to have to find actual activities now.
I suppose it is. I've struggled to keep up at the best of times though.
"The Romanian" sounds like a fun story.
Sort yourself out then and quite complaining. Either you embrace being a fuckup (which I can respect) or you do something about it.
But I want to have my cake and eat it, dickhead.
Can you lace cookies with anything more explicit than weed? I got given one by a colleague when half way through she messaged me telling me to enjoy in a way I'm not sure I was expecting. Good cookie though.
pcp
Jizz.
Cocaine can be used instead of flour.
phonics is drugged phonics is drugged phonics is drugged phonics is drugged phonics is drugged (etc)
Anything generally absorbed through the stomach can go in an edible, but if she's popping MDMA in a cookie I imagine you'd know about it.
You don't lace things with 'weed' either. The weed is all long gone before you start making edibles, by boiling the leaves up to get the residual THC off them then throwing the leaves away.
No it can't.
I'm not noticing anything particularly far off a base level high so I think she was just fucking with me because I said it was my first one.
It's quite nice actually. If I didn't like smoking so much I might consider just having one of these after dinner, wonder if it would help knock out any of the other side effects.
Where did you get 500g of Cocaine from?
Uh, is that gluten free then?
Plus I bet such cookies would slim you right down as well. Someone sort a business of this out in California.
Cocaine is way less prevalent here than in Europe. The girls are the ones that keep business chugging along
First time mowing the lawn. Why does anyone bother with this shit? When I get my house I'll just pave the whole thing.
Cos it looks nice. Andkeeping on top of weeds in a paved yard is just as much hassle.
Tarmac it then ffs.
Karting track instead of a shitty yard. :drool:
A Mexican that doesn’t like mowing lawns?
Combine the two with a speedy lawnmower.
Concrete/tarmac is the only way to go.
Exactly what I had in mind. Imagine the grass you could cut if that had a rear spoiler.
It's not over yet.
Just matched with a gross girl on tinder who messaged me "Hi Igor not a big fan of your dog, but let me sit on your face and we’ve got a deal"
Admired the forwardness enough that I've replied positively and will see how it progresses
Not of your shit dog.
Of the face sitting?
I replied with 'yeah alright' and never got a follow up. Maybe her mate was pissing about on her phone but I'm offended she hasn't gone for it regardless, she looks about 17 stone.
Which reminds me of the time an obese Australian called Carmel sat on my face :drool: ah memories
She probably just wanted to see what it'd look like if she got herpes.
She sounded like Chris Lilley and smelled like dog food, herpes would be the last of her worries.
Unless you're talking about my tinder honey, in which case you may well be right.
Hot localised flooding. So much so the road outside is a flowing river. And the back's flooded. I err.... might have to prepare for this.
Was it Mahow?
I do not use Instagram.
your honour
Do you all still stalk mahow on the WhatsApp?
Yes that's our life.
Igor you're being trolled by some 12-year old kid who wants to see how desperate people are, is all.
I did the PEPSI MAX CHALLENGE in the centre earlier. I'm a Pepsi Max mark, so I would recognise it and choose it regardless, but I can't help thinking that serving it ice cold alongside warm Coca-Cola is a bit dishonest. Still, I got a voucher for a bottle, so good for them.
I came across the DEATH PHOTOS of that couple that got annihilated in Thailand where they blamed a couple of immigrants.
BRUTAL is all I can say.
I haven't seen a head caved in like that before in such detail. And also the guy was only knocked out and drowned. She was fucking pulverised. Such a babe initially as well.
It really is worse when they're pretty women. I hate that it's true but I'm always a little extra gutted when some gorgeous girl turns up "missing".
Every avenue exhausted to get a ticket for the All Ireland Final today but not a hope. High stool it'll be unfortunately.
The one thing Giggles takes seriously in life is Irish patriotism. It’s so clear.
Cannot wait for this stuff to be over so Second Captains can go back to previewing real sports.
:drool:
Not a hope of work tomorrow.
On my way to a wedding in fucking Somerset. On part two of my hour long train journey to new Street (engineering works), with a 3 hour car journey with a bloke I met once 18 months ago and spoke to for five minutes to come.
This better not be shit.
Tomorrow my mate is celebrating his 30th birthday in Liverpool from 12:30 until the last train home.
Unfortunately I am going a child’s 2nd birthday party that starts at 14:30. I’ll probably have to stay for at least two hours meaning the earliest I can get there is probably about 18:00. :(
Why do people even buy kids birthday/Christmas stuff for the first five (say) years? Just wait until they start asking questions.
A 2 year old is old enough to ask questions and ask for shit.
I agree with the principle though. We will have a ~2 month old at Christmas and my other half and family are all asking what he’ll want. A tit to suck and bed to sleep in. Just like his dad. :henn0rz:
I've been in the UK since Friday.
The homeless problem in this country is fucking depressing. I thought it was just a Birmingham thing but I've been to Bristol and now just arrived in Cardiff and it's the same thing. Fucking disgusting. I must have given out about 50 quid so far already because it's so bad.
In Bristol I'd say something like every 3rd door has someone sleeping rough in it and no-one even bats an eye, like it's normal that you can't walk into Boots because fuck, you need to sleep somewhere.
In Hull the council, which being a bunch of Labour saddos would presumably not pass up an opportunity to moan if otherwise, insists that there are enough beds for them at night, but half of them either forget to turn up for them in time or pass on them because you're not allowed to get wasted in the centres.
San Francisco is horrible for it as well. Tent encampents all across the city. Far worse than London, never been to the other UK cities though.
San Francisco sounds like the worst run population centre in the developed world.
lol
Birmingham is pretty awful for it. Noticed it recently. Parts of it looks like a cold war Steve sketch.
He follows me on the Twitter, because I think he used to follow everyone back when he only had about a dozen fans. Now he's big time and boring.
The police in Durham are always shifting them on. There must be three or more regulars I spot which, for a city of this small size, sticks out like a lump. San Francisco sounds like a nightmare, though. Any city where its public transport escalators are clogged with human shit needs sorting out.
Southend town centre is like the Walking Dead these days. Cans on the go at 9am. Needles laying about. Spice being smoked. Scummy cunts.
Phonics probably has some disposable income. I don't give but that's mainly because, if you're in that spot, it's due to a chronic problem that they need to take charge of.
You obviously get the odd genuine case, but being a druggy/Alcoholic roaming the streets conning gullible tourists is a career choice these days. Some of them are geniuses.
I make a lot of money in an expensive country. 50 quid is a days groceries back home. I could eat out breakfast lunch and dinner and barely crack that here. I don't mind giving them a quid here and there.
The price of stuff over here is mental. I got a Vodka Red Bull last night and the bartender asked for 2.50. I had to check if he'd got it wrong. It's 12 quid in Switzerland.
I'm not bothered if I give a quid to someone on the streets and they spend it on heroin instead of food. It doesn't make them a bad person. Even if they are, I give enough of my money to horrible corporations so it doesn't really stand up as an argument.
Either they spend it on booze and drugs or I do.
Buskers were fine before chancers started playing buckets and boxes.
Nah, I can support that. Try-hard students with guitars, I cannot.
Who cares I have way more money than they do. It's not even a dent.
I've gone from not being able to afford to eat to having 15k in my account in less than a year. I'm not going to cry about someone spending 50p on a can instead of a bed.
Buy me an xbox.
I'm working on stupid things to spend it on but sadly, an Xbox for Pepe isn't on the list.
I've said it before, but Southampton is the worst city I've ever seen for homeless people. I get hassled by crackheads asking for money more than ten times per day.
Summer is the worst, because if you're sat outside a pub, you'll just get a constant stream of people asking for money. They even have the cheek to have a go that I've "got money for drinks". Yeah, I have you dickhead, I work for it.
I'll take another PS4 if they're going phonics. 3 is better than 2.
If anything you should give them more so that they can afford heroin and not just food.
give me a tenner you cunt
Pay for teh seever
I buy food instead of handing out money.
I'm in London from Wednesday to Friday if anyone wants to TTH Meet it up. I promise not to bring my army of homeless friends with me.
I'm off work Friday :eyemouth:
@phonics - where you going to be?
:D The man of the people was a cert.
Don't anger him or you'll be the next Whatsapp teeheeing target.
Do you really think that's my life? K.
Awwwwww shit! you're getting it somewhere on whatsapp now, Mahow!
He's also going to need to pay for the drinks and give you £20 right?
I'd settle for a quid for the pool table and a hand shandy.
LeeCovFox and Dr Chorizo are GOING IN.
Edit: I meant on WhatsApp but they’d probably butter your helmet for a chance at some company.
Who's Dr chorizo?
N00b
Who *is* Dr chorizo?
Benny the big dress.
Who is benny
Is who Benny?
Who’s name is Harry Kane?
Spikey would love a nibble of his chorizo.
Whose chorizo?
Mods please delete thread
Well geeze that wasn't very nice.
Stop being such a Chorizo, bruh.
I sometimes fry chorizo and have it with a fry up. Fusion cuisine. Would this Benny character approve?
He approves of all things chorizo.
It's really, really hard to smoke a joint in central London. There's not a side street without someone walking down it for a 10 mile radius.
Go to a park
Just go for it, no one cares what you're doing.
They're more worried about Isis than someone smoking a joint
Thanks for taking that distinguished honour off me. Heavy lies the crown, like.
Completed my second online meet this week. Keeks wife is delightful but I'm holding back all other opinions until I get my invite to THE GROUP.
Fucking took his wife!!! :roflol:
"Hunny, meet Phonics from TTH" :uhoh:
Sweet Jesus.
Taking someone's wife. :nono:
Yep. She assumed I was a United fan though which he immediately corrected before I could. Proper Gent.
Did he flash the gold cards?
So is Kiko trying to adopt you or invite you to a threesome?
Mate just because you'd be embarrassed to acknowledge the existence of people you've spent the last 15 years talking to doesn't make everyone else a closet case.
@Bam but kinda to Shinners as well.
Anyone else picturing bennyboyt and Samadini hiding behind menus across the room?
Sama has literally been to my house so I'd hope for some maturity on that front.
It's not 2003, the internet is basically the same as not-the-internet these days.
Internet meets are fine. Taking your wife is a bit odd, but if she wouldn't let you out otherwise then what you gonna do?
'And don't be telling him anything about us!'
Also, @Giggles, we're still on for a game of golf some time, aye?
She just passed by as they were off somewhere else after. Calm down you literal apes.
Been lacking football mates that live near me for a while, so I'm meeting some people off the internet that I've never spoken to for 5 a side this weekend. It's a weird thing getting over the assumption that anyone other than me who signs up to this sort of thing is some sort of weirdo.
We're all weirdos.
Hold on, there is a seperate whats app TTH group? That must be the 2018 version of those secret child forums that was exposed.
Talk about an overreaction. It was an after work beer. As the wife left her work she met us and me and her went to where we were going to. You've got some weird formal meeting in your head rather than an informal fucking lager with a mate.
I might finally buy myself a PS4 this weekend.
informal fucking lager with a mate.
:harold:
That's reminded me of when Mahow got rekt by Chinny telling him he'd love to go for a pint with him, and now I'll be lolling all weekend.
I can't believe I described Lewis as looking like a Beefy Ed Norton with Hair and got this response. You let the team down Lewis.
What?
I have a PC.
Proud of you lad.
I'd introduce any of you to my wife. Because we're MATES.
Maybe not Mahow.
Jk lol.
The jealousy over the Whatsapp group. :cool:
PS. Hi, everyone.
Why? Is your natural urge to rape when you meet new people?
Plus who rapes who in that situation?
Rapey =/= actual raping.
Nothing formal about arranging to meet up for a beer on a message board and having your wife pop by. Just happened by chance.
I'll be at Stratford soon if anyone wants an informal larger with a matey.
Was it Yev that took Elth out on the piss then took him home for a burger after? :lol:
Ive never heard it refered to as “a burger” before.
The furry burger.
Now that sounds rapey.
Did Mrs Kiko have a lager?
Bam probably tells his wife he's watching porn when he's on here.
No need for profanity.
Shame she packed her bags afterwards 😪
They've just had a US style fly over after the anthem before the All Ireland final. I never thought we had planes so fuck knows where they got them.
EDIT: 24 aircraft apparently. Fuck me, we should invade someone.
You can have Wales if you want.
Can they have Luton too?
Let’s not push it.
Liverpool and Luton? No wonder you can't agree a deal with our German overlords.
I'm back :cool:
5 cities in 9 days. Made the rookie mistake of not booking Monday off as well though so it's off to work tomorrow.
I have no idea where to post this so:
Some guy just tried to convert me to Christianity. Full blown evangelism. Adam and Eve was real, Noah's Ark happened and he had to kill all of them except Noah. ('Thou shalt not kill' doesn't apply to God apparently.) The works. He called me a slave to Satan if I didn't repent my sins. I said wouldn't that just make me a slave to God and he said 'Yeah but who wouldn't want to be a slave to a God?'
Wild shit. I'm just here waiting for my drug dealer dude.
Sorry, thought you seemed the type.
:D
Sounds like that div who inhabited Oxford Circus for years (probably still does) with his sandwich board and his megaphone.
There was an Indian mob in the high street that had been conned into accepting Jesus. They were singing Christian songs with a Bollywood twist sans any actual singing ability. It was hilarious.
I spent half an hour this evening installing a virtual machine of windows XP so I can use an antiquated chess game I got off amazon. Surprised by how nostalgic I felt when it played the startup noise.
Igor, not to be rude but you know you can just right click on the .exe for XP right?
https://i.imgur.com/mBL1rMZ.png
PS: BattleChess is the greatest chess game of all time.
https://vignette.wikia.nocookie.net/...en_-_Amiga.gif
I'm dog sitting. He was sulking because I went to the gym, but I gave him a vanilla slice and he's alright now.
If I gave my dog anything that had been past the beady eye of Mr Kipling, she would literally shit herself with excitement and then vomit it back up moments later.
If he wasn't meant to have all the things you aren't supposed to give dogs, why isn't he dead? #hadenoughofexperts
Our old cat used to eat stuff off my mum's plate, cus she could never face telling it off (sure you'll all be gobsmacked to hear this wasn't dissimilar to her approach to parenting), and once the cat had a big bite of a piece of fucking lemon instead of the fish she was presumably going for. Got a good laugh out of the cat's stupid face, then another one for the ridiculousness of my mum telling me off for "being mean to the cat".
Cats should be punched long before they get near a table.
Aye but tell that to my parents.
https://i.ytimg.com/vi/lkKwyjsJGxk/hqdefault.jpg
I just played on Chess.com for what must be the first time since I was about 15 and realised I had no idea what you were supposed to do at the start. These were how they analysed my play in the very short amount of time I managed to get my queen taken and resigned.
https://i.imgur.com/JmhuJ9m.png
A few games later, I'm starting to get the hang of it, I still don't know what an opening move is but I've got a solid closer.
https://i.imgur.com/jZM2ipm.png
edit: In that game I managed to outdo my shameful attempt at this game they called Chess against Igor by making the right move 14% of the time (while he hit 40%) by only making the right decision 9% of the time.
If anyone wants an immersive interactive experience you can use the wetherspoons app and buy me and my mates drinks. Table 19 rugby spoons x
Managed to put my foot in it quite spectacularly last night.
Me and three of my pals were eating dinner prior to watching some comedy show, and were moaning about some bloke we all know. He used to make really lame and stupid songs back in the day, and I sang a bit of one of them to take the piss out of him, and somehow my brain instead went for a song that one of the fucking people sat next to me had made instead.
It was on his youtube page and was a song he'd made as a video job application for some charity years ago, that he'd NEVER shown any of us and would have no reason to believe anyone would have ever seen. I found it years ago, and had obviously watched it a lot of times to know it off by heart. In that brief brain fart moment, I revealed to him that I'd been loling at him behind his back for fucking years, and I think he would have known I'd have shared that video with pretty much everyone I know at some point, because I'm the kind of cunt who would do that.
I obviously had no way to weasel out of it and just had to roll with it. Rest of the evening was quite tense, with him never talking to me, and our interactions limited to him making sarky comments like "oh yeah, lets go to a pub IGOR wants to go to, he'll DEFINITELY know a good one", and he HATED the comedy as well. Loudly talking to one of our mates about how it was the worst thing he'd ever seen and HOW COULD ANYONE FIND THAT FUNNY. I mean, fair play really.
Today I'm meant to be back in London for his SISTER's birthday party, at which I know nobody except her and him. I think I'll probably be sacking that off.
Shag his sister. You’ve got to double down at points like this.
Well that basically happened already about 10 years ago, and had added a slight tension to our friendship that HAD just about disappeared at last. Maybe we're just not meant to be mates.
You have the weirdest fucking life inside that head.
Use the song as your ringtone.
I went back to look at it when I got home and he's deleted it off youtube. Sad. The fact I'd never thought to make backups is pretty out of character for me.
Your only mistake there was not having lolled at the video all those years ago. My friend used to go out with somebody whose best mate was discovered on a dating site looking for other couples to swing with, and, although the news got around, nobody ever mentioned it to them that they knew. How would you not bring that up for a lol at the the first and every subsequent opportunity?
Aye, I wish I'd just laughed about it to his face, like I had done the two times I found embarrassing stuff on his computer when we were fourteen. The amputee porn off limewire was pretty bad, but once I saw an mp3 called "hannah" in a weird folder with nothing else in it, and played it while he was having a piss and I just heard him scream and run back to his bedroom to turn it off. Obviously i hit windows+l and restrained him while me and my mate howled with laughter. Turns out it was some song he recorded to win the affections of some girl. Somehow that feels more honourable than this cus at least I didn't do it behind his back.
It makes you wonder what sort of lengths Luca will have gone to to have that Samsung thing erased from existence.
We found a video of my - then 21 year old - colleague lip syncing to some shit on Instagram. The girl that found it let me watch it on her phone, so I did the sensible thing and ‘liked’ it for her. He went home sick after lunch and the video mysteriously disappeared.
Somewhere on the internet there's a remix of the Casino Zone from Sonic 2 where I do a concept rap of being Gary Glitter trying to convince other people to join my gang.
I'm on a fan commentary of This is England where I sympathise with a racist.
I've watched a video of my mate boning someone on youporn. Think he's got it deleted again.
Whatever gets you off, mate.
Oh man. My pal is a wannabe professional wrestler, used to do it quite a lot when he lived in the North East, but tonight was his BIG RETURN TO THE RING after a 5 year absence, and his midlands debut. Me and a couple of mates obviously went to go and see him.
It was gloriously bush league, as the kids say, and the audience was EXACTLY what you'd expect. Handful of mad nans shouting for the heels to bloody behave themselves, plenty of people who look like they hang around CEX drinking monster, and the rest were general oddballs (but which group do i fall into??). The main announcer/authority figure looked like the lovechild of Paul Heyman and Willie Thorne, and the end of the first half of the show was a bunch of Peaky Blinders looking rotters trying to kick the shit out of him until the his son came out to save him (who in turn looked like the bloke out of Sum 41 after he'd gotten really fat).
My mate was pretty great, which was nice. You could tell he'd wrestled before, and he was the only person on the show we saw who seemed to know how to do audience interaction. Just getting people to clap along and stuff but it was alright, like. As a whole, it felt just like the backyard thing Louis Theroux went to in weird weekends...obviously.
FIVE STARS
I really hope that's a Review reference. No other fucker has watched it.
I went to one of those tinpot wrestling shows as a kid and it was actually pretty brutal. The ring obviously wasn't sprung or padded in any way so it was just a load of big blokes flinging eachother onto boards of MDF.
One of the local feds up here borrowed some of TNA's talent. I could've seen Robbie E at my local sports centre but I thought better of it.
Went and watched this at The Lowry tonight:
https://www.theguardian.com/stage/20...ringe-festival
My first theatre experience. Fuck me its class innit
I have an old Samsung T220D tv that needs to be mounted to a wall. The part needed to mount it, I can't seem to obtain as the TV was not designed to be mounted to the wall. I'm thinking maybe I could just put the TV on a large floating shelve or even inside some plastic housing unit like they have with the Tvs in prison,.
Why does it need to be mounted to a wall if it was not designed to be so?
I'm afraid it isn't. What's Review? Is it any good?
I'll be honest, it wasn't particularly brutal last night, except for an unprotected chair shot to someone's back. Maybe I'm just a little wuss, but even that made me feel uncomfortable. I think the context of it being in front of about 40 people made it feel a bit unnecessary.
Today I got up at 7am, and made a massive vat of curry for dinner for the next few days, and have done prep for making a similarly huge amount of veggie chili for work lunches after I get back from playing board games. Not having a hangover on a Sunday is doing weird things to me.
Seeing old clips of British wrestling and from shows at different time periods on the WWE network does show an amazing set of middled aged to elderly women at wrestling shows. One of my favourites is an old New Age Outlaws match where they cut to a woman with massive specs and a perm going word-for-word on Road Dogg's pre-match schtick. Presumably up to and including the "Suck it!" from Billy Gunn at the end.
Unexpected trip to see the family. My sister wanted to meet up and then decided we might as well go round to mam and dad's as well. Turned out nice, especially when my nephew couldn't get the dregs out of his juice bottle. Rather than discover he has to suck, he took one look at my dad and launched the bottle at him. Kids drink a lot. Or at least this one does.
Waiting for my first ever Megabus. Already 15 minutes late. Pray for me lads. X
Thought the megabus would be your natural habitat tbh.
I did a Megabus from Manchester to London on an Easter Sunday once. It was the day after Swedish House Mafia at the Warehouse Project and it was fucking brutal. The range of pupil sizes and gurns was impressive. The 4 hour trip via every town in between was less so.
It was also the day after @John saw me and bottled saying hello after being intimidated by my face paint and Gio-Goi attire.
I had Igor down as a train man.
In fairness any transport I'm on is pretty mega by default. And yeah I'm 100% a train guy usually but it was either 3 hours direct from cov for £35 return or £90 and a four hour journey including getting from Euston to Liverpool Street. Fuck that. It's quite nice tbh, have two seats to myself. Shame about the cunt periodically kicking the back of my seat.
Ah, a Megabus isn't a party bus.
:D. After a recentish eccied Saturday night in London I fell asleep on the last train back to rugby on sunday, got woken up in Birmingham with no phone battery or money on my debit card at 2am. Had to give a taxi driver my phone as a deposit and get 80 quid at an ATM from my credit card once back in rugby.
I've got red dead 2. 😎
What's a megabus?
A proper top bus.
Yeah. I know because it snowed that night and the only other time I went was in the Sunmer.
Top quality night it was as well. I don’t do drugs but still somehow ended up sharing poppers with an over friendly Scouser.
One of the blokes I went with went on to start ‘Underground Audio’ and regularly works with the likes of Loco Dice. His Facebook regularly makes me seeth. He’s just back from ADE in Amsterdam where he had passes to absolutely everything. The lucky cunt.
https://uk.megabus.com
Not a party bus.
Going on the ale trail from Huddersfield to Manchester with @Baz for a mates 30th. It’s always a good time.
Between nights booked away for a quick break, a funeral, and a wedding I've just spent my 5th night in a hotel. Thank God I can go home tomorrow.
Went for a quiet couple of pints last night which ended up with me doing lines of md and talking absolute shite with my mate and her other mate until 5am. Asleep by 5.30, awake at 7.30, in work at 8.30. I feel both ashamed of my behaviour last night but also proud/amazed that i didn't call in sick today.
When's the date with the Italian?
When are the pictures of said Italian coming?
tomorrow, never
I've seen.
Speaking of weddings, just back from one and at communion time the priest announced that there was regular and gluten free. What the fuck like? They must weigh about half a gram.
I took the dog for an ice cream, but 'we stop selling it in winter'. Good job we're seven weeks early then love! No. I had to get him some shop-bought cheesecake like a chump.
What's his favorite flavor?
Buying cheesecake for the dog :D
Brock. :cool:
He's a dog, of course he's happy with any of them. He'd probably eat his own shit if you let him.
You've never even met him.
That's the look of someone who has made it in life.
He's nine in December. Doesn't look a day over five. :cool:
He looks like he’s deep into the worst hangover of his life
I really can't be arsed to go on my date today. Dilemma of working out which I'll regret more out of going or not going.
We need the inevitable tale of woe that will follow, you cunt.
You better bloody go after building us up all week!
She cancelled! Is it wrong that I'm really pleased? Avoid having to go without any of regret of self-inflicted FOMO.
went to a banging house party yesterday. it was scheduled to start at 6, me and two of my mates arrived at 8, it was done by 11.
A guy I used to work with has gone to Uni and recently had a HOUSE PARTY at his student accommodation. He invited half of Essex, but as he doesn't actually speak to any of his flat mates, it was all restricted to his bedroom.
After the 8th guest arrived, they took it to the local park instead, and - because London - 3 of them got mugged.
Beautiful.
My mate put four screenshots of his phone home screen into our group chat earlier, absolutely baffled as to why none of them was showing us what he was seeing. He'd cracked his screen. He was sending screenshots to show us his screen was cracked. I could not be happier.
:D fucking hell
Me and the old man went to the Brooklands Museum today, which is pretty good, and Mercedes-Benz World, which isn't really. Interesting reading about their history though. For a massive company, they were remarkably quiet from the mid-thirties to the fifties. They just seem to have not done anything.
Hanging with the family for the nephew's christening. It went pretty well, despite my voice dying overnight from this bullshit cold. Bairns are class. Better day than yesterday's gig. I forget just how rough the late buses through Gateshead get. They're always full of drunken shites that smell of sugar puff piss.
If anything could have topped ignoring the warning sign and shuffling up the track then that would have been it.
People walk on that all the time. There are hidden bits away from the actual museum where you can walk and no one would ever see you, even if they wanted to, which they don't.
Oh well. That Mercedes complex is a weird thing. Why is it there? You could understand it in their own town, but why are they offering people potted histories, race simulators, and fifteen-hundred quid skidpan experiences here?
Maybe the Germans ran the town for a week in the '40s?
Flat to myself, big fuck off pizza, couple of bottles of beer and a shit FA cup tie on the telly. #bliss
I’m in Keswick.
I'm doing nowt. The Christmas market is in town so that'll be clogged up with all sorts of wankers.
Tis the season, you miserable cunt.
There is no God in Durham. Only the Chinese. And I hate getting around town when those 'quaint medieval streets' bottleneck everyone everywhere.
I'm taking down a century old stone wall and 'ruining the traditional aesthetic of the town' while I'm at it.
I’m going snowboarding in a foot of new powder
I'm going to see Father Christmas.
I was there recently. Keswick, that is, not your used johnnie infested lodge. It's rather nice.
I lost a pub quiz yesterday because when you name all the world oceans. There should only be four. The fifth southern ocean is incorrect.
He's half Vulcan, half human. Fact.
Went to probably my favourite ever club night last night to celebrate my birthday, which is tomorrow. Spellbound in Brighton, alternative 80s night, DJed by Simon Price. Great mix of indie disco classics and more surprising tracks I just can't imagine being played at any other club nights. Just a really nice relaxed atmosphere, and a decent majority of the people in attendance clearly remember the 80s from when it was actually happening. My group of late-20s people were just about the youngest people there. Would recommend.
Happy birthday.
thanks honey
Armageddon is on Channel 5, and we are moments away from the biggest pop in cinema history: the second Armadillo turning up.
There it is. :drool:
Depending on his ability to catch the last train, we're about 45 minutes away from a big festive TTH meet...
:sherlock:
Who is it?
Giggles.
Can't wait.
Expect a post in the relationship thread in an hour detailing how he bottled the shag.
:(
http://i66.tinypic.com/2ebd91d.jpg
Me and :sherlock: enjoying the ufc
What an absolute piece of shit. I’m three foot taller than this gnome.
You don't look at all well, Phonics. Is there a bag of chemo medicine hooked up just off camera?
When has he ever looked well?
Thank Igior for me choosing not to be mean to either of you.
:face:
Must have been some blowjob.
By your own standards yes.
Every three months the best pub in the world (which happens to be in St Helens) has a beer festival, where they go from having the normal range of about 12 ales, to having about 25. Went there yesterday and it was as good as ever - apols if you follow me on Twitter cos we rate all the beers on Untappd and it goes on Twitter - and then at half five I met my mate after he’d finished work. I was drunk by now so stuck to lemonade in Wetherspoons and then we were walking to another pub that sells ale cos I was ready to get back in it when I had to storm in and ask if I was hallucinating cos the grotty bar we used to go A LOT ten years ago was open again. It has changed its name from Bar Bullion to The Vault but my god it was back! So we went in there (they do ale now too so happy days) and it was amazing. My mate bought everyone in there a shot to celebrate, and I spent at least an hour talking to a stranger about GG Allin cos he had a ponytail so I just went up to him and declared he must like rock n roll. Took a pic with him too, cos that’s what I do.
But yeah was good. Just been for a curry tonight too so a pretty good weekend. :)
I’m still buzzing that the Bullion is back.
Lunch with the family for the nephew's birthday. The pub had a cocktail cabinet with Pacman, Centipede, Donkey Kong and three other classics. I wish I'd spotted it before we were leaving. :moop:
Cable-tying all the cables in my house this weekend. Ive got the velcro strip versions which means they can be used forever. Not exciting.
In every room of your house?
I work in a pretty big branch of a big bank in a pretty big town. There's a much smaller (~10k population) town about 7 miles away that also had a branch of this bank, and I used to work the odd shift there. The branch there shut down at Christmas. A huge percentage of customers have just been taught by their kids how direct debits and ATMs work, but the people who actually need to come to a bank have to come to our branch now.
Anyway, there's 3 pubs there who do their business banking with us, and the managers are all really sound funny blokes, so me and my colleague jokingly agreed to get a bus over there and do a mini pub crawl. We actually did it tonight.
Definitely about the 50th time I've done something crap because I've convinced myself beforehand that the inherent crapness of an idea is the very thing that'll make it fun or at least funny. As it was I misread the bus timetable so we had to get a £20 taxi, then get a pint in three really crap pubs. In pubs 1 and 2 the managers weren't working. In pub 3 he only came out when the girl on the bar heard our pathetic story and buzzed the bell for him. He came downstairs looking confused, pissed off and disheveled. Saw us, shook our hands, said "alright lads, sorry i'm feeling rough, gonna go back to bed", then went back upstairs. Smoking outside afterwards I said to my workmate "that 5 second conversation was literally the only reason we've come here".
We then paid another £20 for another taxi back home after I'd convinced my mate not to "have a look round" the bona fide brothel on the high street.
Cleaning the bathroom and I have definitely over done it with the bleach fumes. Time for me to drop tools and drink beer at the pub.
Photos?
cables are all tucked away nicely. I would have to move desks and tables to show off the work .
Should have thought ahead. Get them shifted.
Don't tell me what I should have done.
Sorry.
Well this is awkward.
Don't tell me how to feel.
Well this is awkward.
Finally got around to cleaning the inside of my car out after a bit of neglect. Felt really good getting it all vacuumed and tidy. Like a brand new car.
Anyone have any handy tips for streak-free windows?
Window spray and balled up newspapers
Used to do the newspaper bit when we still got the local paper and that does work wonders.
I tried to just do it with a regular chamois cloth, even using the good ol' RainX, but still found streaks last night.
Might have to just pick up one of the little cheap circulars I guess.
Dunno where else to put this.
https://www.nytimes.com/interactive/...lect-quiz.html
Toggle Spoiler
Southern Fairy @Baz
fak off u paff.
It's put me around Norwich which is very wrong.
It wouldn't show my result on my phone. Which is even wrongerer.
My results also reflect where I am from.
Portsmouth?
They got me right. They should, given how specific geordie is.
They got me right.
As if anyone in Hull says 'mother'.
I say 'mam', but that would have to be written as 'me mam', and then before you know it I'm that idiot who writes in jibberish for that Jock newspaper.
Mam or ma. It's always so hard to find a card that doesn't say Mum.
Maw
Our ma.
Pronounced exactly like the first parts of Har Mar Superstar.
I still need to record that wdytoe speaking of accents.
:drool:
https://scontent-lht6-1.xx.fbcdn.net...20&oe=5CF9CF4F
close enough, though i'm basically right at the bottom of the shaded area.
watched a poker tournament from 2004 until 1am last night, up at 7, in work 8.30-1.30, fifa tournament i didn't win from 2-7, QUIPLASH 8-11, then went out into town until about 2.
a friend of a friend offered me his bag of drugs to "do a gum of", but my licked thumb accidentally managed to pick up a big rock of it, so i just kept it in my palm until i went home, and have since cut and insufflated it. was almost certainly paracetamol, pro plus and flour but the element of (accidentally, as usual) being a massive twat and not spending any money has given me the illusion of fun.
Nowhere else to stick this, but I was leaving the gym earlier, and somebody I have never spoken to goes 'Here mate, you're a chef aren't you', as if for me to confirm it to his gym buddy. I said no, he asked where I worked, I said where, and then he tells me that someone told him I was a chef. What sort of shit rumour is that to be the subject of?
Such a rumour would never happen to Igor. The whole town seemed to know where he worked including our Uber driver.
Sounds like you got merked, Lewis.
If you really were the TTH database you'd have said you are and shown him Molton's food pictures and claimed them as your own.
I call this one chicken and broccoli on pasta
Looking for s chef for his meth lab
Yeah, in a gym, sounds like he was after some 'ingredients'.
Lewis do you live in Portsmouth now?
Yes. I got a job as a chef.
:face:
I don't really keep up with the kids anymore :sorry:
It has a historic port.
Great kitchen though.
We don't serve cous cous here, it's for communists.
"Here's your vegan option." <points to exit>
5 on a bank holiday Monday and tomorrow off. I need to convince the boss to the bar.
I went to the garden centre and bought some plants :cool:
Our shed is on the verge of collapse so looks like my weekend will consist of getting everything out of the sodding thing. Hoping it holds on til then as I do love a good demolition job.
A boy in Paisley took a load of people hostage in his flat last night, threatening to burn the place to the ground. When the police asked him his demands they were a bag of cans, Brendan Rodgers back, and a job. :lol:
Outstanding.
I don't understand how people get THAT drunk but maybe it's cause I smoke a bit and don't end up just pounding beers the whole time.
Fly fishing for wild brown trout, hopefully not fall in the water this time, the water is pretty cold in March with some of the ice yet to melt
New York is somewhat planned out. Liberty and Ellis Island look like potential time sinks which is why that's first on the menu. Central Park looks like another. All the stuff I've earmarked seems to come to around $250. Could've been more but I'm not much of an art person and New York's full of that shit. At least I'm getting out of Manhattan for a couple of things.
Getting to Liberty Island then Ellis Island then back is minimum 3 hours but if you are even somewhat interested in the immigration side of things (which is of course the reason you're going) you're looking at 4-5 hours. It's very good though but you're right it takes up the majority of your day.
Central Park is pretty great too just to mooch around. Hopefully it warms up a bit for your visit.
If it hasn't already been said do not under any circumstances bother going up the Statue of Liberty. It's shit and pointless.
100% this ^
What's the rest of your itinerary Shindig?
Enjoy the food and beer here - both are very good.
East Village is like America’s very own Shoreditch, which is of course the pinnacle of Western civilization. You should check it.
And booked up until July. Right, so I'll get back, have time to do the MoMA whilst it's free.
@Josh I'm looking to do:
- Financial District (WTC, Occulus, Wall Street, Federal Hall) and can probably sneak in the One World whilst I'm there. It's a cheaper Observatory than Top of the Rock but if I miss a view I can get one at ground level from Brooklyn Bridge or something.
- Guggenheim is free Saturday evening so I can take a wander around there. New York's got too much art for me to be bothered by most of it but at least this has a building to gawp at.
- Grand Central. I'm a sucker for big stations.
- I've got a couple of things to get me out of Manhattan. The Museum of the Moving Image in Astoria and the Transit Museum in Brooklyn. Might get out to Flushing for the Hall of Science and Flushing Meadows.
- Oh, the Intrepid. It's a bit of a walk from the nearest subway but it's my option for looking at planes and stuff. And I like the idea of being on a massive carrier.
I've listed stuff out in an email to myself with nearest subways and streets. Might actually make my way down to South Street Seaport and gawp at the old boat. Fraunces Tavern might be an idea as well.
Went to the Transit Museum at the weekend - that's a very cool place to spend an hour and it's only $10.
Download Citymapper rather than note down the subways etc. Weekends the schedules can change A LOT and the frequency of the trains is not like London. If you use Citymapper your whole trip will be a lot smoother as it accounts for live issues and changes and with the MTA, there are a lot of issues with the subways as they're old and underfunded.
I think you said you're over this weekend. Sunday is meant to be decent weather. Make sure you walk the high line/brooklyn bridge/central park on that day - walking around NY in actual warmth and sun is pretty great.
I'm on old iOS so I'll have to wing the transit a bit.
This is why Josh is better than Greg.
Found my FM15 file :drool: :drool:
Loaded the game for the first time for 3 years and We're (Hibs) playing the champions league final against Real Madrid tomorrow. April 2028. Apparently we lost in the final 2 years ago. I stopped reload cheating when I was 14 but I'm very confused; I can't imagine I'd have just abandoned the file to play the beta of FM 16. I'll give myself the benefit of the doubt and assume this is just the legitimate continuation of the game.
Casual bit of GBH last night as I repeatedly had a toilet stall door kicked into my face. Nose is a bit busted but no worse than that thankfully.
We're going to need some more details if we're to send Dave and Bamster out in the van, sir.
I went in to use the shitter (had just got back from a school trip, dodgy burger on the way back had me ‘turtle-heading’ in the car) - this pub was the nearest place I could void my bowels. I was in there a while and could hear people doing coke in the next stall. Assume this guy was one of them as he went “We’ve got a paedo in here” and kicked the door the first time (I was mid wipe at this point). Kicked a few more times, then lifted himself up to get a look at me. Started kicking again calling me a paedo every time and a couple of times the door caught me in the face. Thankfully he got bored eventually and I got out of there as quickly as I could. Nose is bruised, bloody and swollen but no idea if it’s broken.
An all round humiliating and frustrating experience (police can’t do anything - no witnesses I know of and no CCTV).
I don't think you can just dismiss these allegations given how strongly he clearly felt about it.
Did you accidentally have the volume up on your phone or something?
u okay hun? X
Start to move into a new flat this weekend. 15 mins walk to the Emirates :drool:
But moving is such a fucking ballache.
Was he a 6'7" rugby star or something wtf
Makes sense that we have a pedo on here tbh.
Hiding in plain sight as well. He must have been lolling his head off at all the cover Hammer used to provide.
It's been obvious since Baz's chernos thread.
You’re all welcome.
Another nonce crawling out of the woodwork.
Spent all day at a beer festival yesterday - well, from 2 til 7, and got absolutely hammers. Had a brilliant day though - sun was out, had some lovely beer - shout out to Age Of Aquarius, best red beer you'll ever have - and pretty much spent all day chatting rubbish with teh ladz. Our wives were there too, which changed the dynamic from the usual but was by no means a bad thing. Tiger Roll won me a few quid too, the beaut.
I thought I was doing okay, but then basically shutdown in a curryhouse at about 9:30. Practically asleep in my chair, was embarrassing. Thankfully the wife got us a taxi and we went home. Then I spewed into my own hands as soon as I got in, obviously dropping most of it on the carpet. Managed to get back outside and spewed on the driveway, then spent a good five minutes hurling chunks into my wheelie bin. Wife cleaned up my sick like a boss though, and I went to bed.
Had a black sludge beeriod this morning, that I couldn't even feel it coming out but the pure tarmac baby's first poo looking massacre that awaited me in the bowl confirmed I had indeed been pooing. I hosed the chicken tikka sick off the drive at 8am, then crawled back in bed and slept 9-12. Got KFC and it was everything I needed and more. :) Then my brother in law came round for a bit and his girlfriend was so hungover it actually made me feel even better.
Went out on Friday after work and I still feel kinda rough today. I don't know how people do it every weekend.
I'm off to someone at works wedding tonight. Should be fun as long as you get sat with the right people, I might even get up for a dance.
Tomorrow though I am off to a beer festival with @Baz and some mates (if I was Baz I'd link to the thread about 'Rugby lad Tom' as he's going), which means I'll be taking it a little easy tonight, hopefully they have a beer on I like though.
I woke up today and could tell that I'll have the flu/a cold in a day or two :(
Then it won't be the weekend, you mong.
Ever since mo turned this into the paedophile thread it has been open season for the idiots.
Well, you had better be in here with Avian Swine Flu (there's a 'when pigs fly' joke here somewhere) by midnight tomorrow.
Spent the weekend in the Lakes. Beautiful part of the world.
I had a pretty fun weekend. I've realised recently that I have a bit of a problem with booze though; the venn diagram of "times I'm drunk enough to let go of my inhibitions enough to dance and enjoy being in a nightclub" and "times I get embarrassingly hammered, do really regrettable things and don't remember half of the evening" is basically a single circle. I'm pretty good at slowly accumulating pints of ale in old man pubs, but as soon as dance floors and jagerbombs are involved it all goes to shit.
Surprised, thought that was going to be more igor_balishit.
I trust all our London contingent were down to lend their support...
Do you do this 'Darkness Into Light' bollocks over there or is it just a thing here?
What is it?
https://www.darknessintolight.ie/
It's a suicide awareness thing.
National selfie day.
Never heard of it.
Just bought RAGE 2... so yeah, Monday to Friday will still be a bit too busy for the playthrough, however, during the weekend I'll shot and loot, and explode, and exterminate every single bad mf**er out there in the wasteland, the massacre will be gorgeous and I'll bath in the blood of the mutants!
If bots like him become more common, this forum might still have legs for the future.
Only his second post outside Gamezine. Though admittedly this one was about computer games...
I love this thing.
No link in this one though.
I’m off work til Tuesday now. Going staying in a log cabin in Bedale in Yorkshire. :)
Gdansk this weekend 🗣️
This weekend I get to see Ellie. The star of WDYTOE. Nearly four months!
What’s good in Harrogate?
I've no ball to go to this Sunday at all. It's fucking miserable anyway so I'll just drink.
Managed to spend three hours there without getting bored. :thbup:
Went to the Orlando City match Friday night, followed up with a day trip at Sea World's waterpark Aquatica (complete with protesters at the front gate) and a visit to our local lower division pro club (in what amounts to our 4th division).
Basically a club made up of random college players who want some games in between their collegiate seasons. Great time though.
http://i66.tinypic.com/mcafbs.png
Looking after my little mate for the week. :cool:
Boydy is doing Igor this weekend?
That'll make a good story.
Igor drinking on the pink train to pain.
@Lewis beast 😎
I just wanted you to stop ignoring me. :(
I've just finished a 563km round trip with a raging hangover :(
That's 2.2165E+07 inches, Mokkers.
How many knots did you experience?
Also, you might want to put that in feet for Phonics.
5541338.58 hands.
We should have a TTH Podcast where two names are randomly picked each week and then we get to make a thread to fire questions at them. Giggles and Mahow should kick us off.
Baz and Mike can host. We can try and turn them into the Poundworld Ant and Dec then when they get picked up by Channel 5 the profits can keep the forum going.
Sure.
Who's booking me the flights?
Kiko.
I don't need a private jet, Aer Lingus would do.
Anyone from Lancashire? They're in blue.
https://youtu.be/QdyV6qUCDXQ
Oi.
Mates having us over for food and drink in a few hours in Woking. Hopefully she has a garden to get out into the sun.
I have football golf tomorrow for money. 10 man involved. Ive done this 3 times previously for coins and i have yet to lose.
But what if his friends have been hustling him?
Wouldn't mind trying that some time.
Then squad up with your team or take a short boat drip north east and connect with thommo thanks to MapHub.
Giggles and the squad. :cool:
My squad would make Average Joes look like the gladiators.
Giggles makes his squad lie in their own piss.
TTH tourney. Everyone brings their squads and we duke it out.
If that is the case, skip that and lets just do TTH FightClub
There's one close to my house actually. I'm going next Saturday if it's still there.
I bloody love footgolf.
How long are the holes normally?
I guess maximum is 400m each hole?
Pretty sure I played on a 9 hole par 3 course.
I play on an 18 hole course. There are also people playing golf on the same course at the same time as footgolf. There is also another golf course next to it but thats for the serious golfers. Footgolf is banned on that field.
Why isn't it going in the fucking hole.
If only it had gone that far :(
I've been to about 50 premier league games and saw man utd with Berbatov, Tevez and Ronaldo destroy us at the hawthorns but the best sporting moment I've ever witnessed in person was my mate hitting a hole in one at foot golf.
Do you have to kick it through something in this footgolf business or is it like the (really shit) frisby version where there's a weird chain pole target thing?
Not sure why you'd go to an actual golf course and not just play golf. It's not like you have to be any good at it to enjoy trying to Happy Gilmore it off the tee (you actually have to be really good to do that).
Yeah, that's the blight of golf in these isles. It's one of the last bastions of absolute arseholery. I think I've only ever played once here, but used to play quite a bit in Australia where you could pretty much just turn up and hack away on the many municipal courses or whatever they were called for a modest fee.
It really pisses me off that the main/'Royal' course over here is on public/common land but for years they bascially denied you access as a local unless you became a member at an exorbitant cost. I think that may have gone now though as it's a game/sport in proper full-on decline. Slayed, as per Jimmy's theory, by the bigger spectre/menace of 'road cycling'.
I have another date this morning and more football golf tomorrow.
3 hour shift on the school fete bar this afternoon. It's hot.
Sunbathing during the day [read: burning] and hosting people in the evening for a wine tasting (the wife works in wine so she's the driver on this). Parkrun this morning was pretty difficult with the heat but think I got a new PB.
The last wine tasting I did I wasn't impressed with the wine as such (although I do really like Shiraz) but the raclette(?) that was brought with it ensured it was a lovely social experience.
Go grab one, Keeks. Awesome addition to social occasions.
Looking after my 8 month old whilst wife takes our daughter to 2 kids birthday parties and puppy sitting for my cousin.
That response confused me for a moment.
I meant this, not the actual cheese. :D
Meats and cheese + wine = envious.
Missus birthday which I did quite well thank you very much.
I wish I knew how to articulate my points, opinions and suggestions better but I'm just shit. :cry:
I've come a long way since the your/you're days though...
Thought I was going to be deep searched at airport security.
A security guy said just come with me and as I turned I saw a little cubicle and thought that was where we were heading. Fortunately he was just taking me to another guard who could test my hands and bag for drugs.
Well, speaking from experience, it is not a good feeling. "Bend over and wiggle" are words I don't think I will ever forget.
I had to work last minute as I've a big job on next week and some stuff got delayed, so all beering plans are postponed.
Town carnival later which the kids are in, so think I have to walk along with the bucket collecting coppers.
Parkrun nearly killed me this morning, no PB here :/
http://i67.tinypic.com/21lu045.jpg
Why is it side ways? Played tinypic.
:wub:
Say Hi to Lola, Spikey.
Toggle Spoiler
That's adorable, Spikey.
:cool:
Is that a euphemism?
Provincial hurling final day, nothing like it :cool:
Bought a car this afternoon, which wasn’t on the agenda. Was going to wait a few weeks but my car died again this morning and I’m not putting any more money into it.
What car did you get?
It’s a Dacia Logan. It’s nothing fancy, but reliable and a load of boot space. And it’s diesel. Ive been driving a 20 year old Nissan Almera for the last 10 years so this feels like stepping into the future.
Here is me thinking its a Lancia
Just home from a weekend away with work, we took 55 kids to PGL. Had a blast as always but I’m shattered!
Why you'd neg rep me for this but leave a nice message, @Smjffy?
I hoovered a joint yesterday and got so stoned I spewed in Mcdonalds toilet and went to bed in my clothes. Disgrace.
Maybe it’s the dialect that’s throwing me off. You hoovered it? Does that mean you ate the joint?
I don’t know what a hoover is, so the action in question was a mystery to me
Still wild that he ended up in that state after one (Scottish) joint
Vacuum, Mug.
Mug is making an extreme fool of himself, when the main point was to make myself look like a twat. You've always got my back bro.
Deep friend edibles ftw?
I've managed to cut down on the olde smoke myself. Limited to one before bed and that's my lot. I had to knock it on the head for a week or two just to get the effects again.
Ounce a week down to a Q. £££ to ££. Still, need something healthier.
Might explain why I'm "unstableeeeeee"
Shit. That's Krizz. Damnit.
Now you look lame.
What a loser. I hope you get pulled over.
Don't do drugs. She can use it against you.
As if. There's weed everywhere these days. Get the bus to somewhere stupidly far away and hoover that joint up for the good of the board.
It's in the car because I forgot to take it out. I'll just spark up here I'm not going to drive away to a field and do a shame smoke. I'm 30 and I live in a basement.
#420
Lol I'm not going to post it online or anything.
Oh fuck. Baz.
'Adventure smoke' :D
My former friends partner used it against him and he still has issues whereby he's not allowed to drive with his own kid. You can't gauge some people, Magic. It takes one wrong arguement on any given night then boom, she's got you. Again.
Sad that we even have to think of that but just be wary fella. TTH has your back.
Go for an adventure dogging too.
Thumb it in.
Went to Lowes to pick up some stuff and as I was about to park I noticed that the spot was reserved for Army Veterans. What a country.
I saw a man with a prosthetic leg park a Lotus Elise in a disabled space once. Alright, he does pass; but if you can squeeze yourself in and out of one of those are you really that crippled?
Fitter than most of the population if anything.
Speaking of, my sister registered her dog (a yorkshire) as a fucking service dog so she could take it anywhere. You should do that with Brock and take him out for a pint of milk.
Just go round to Waff's and watch Love Island together.
Being Mexican it probably just means she can't eat it.
That was in the U S of A, of course. In Mexico nobody would give a shit about the crappy vest your dog is wearing, they would still kick both of you out.
Dogs shouldn't have people food. It gives them lofty ideas.
I don’t understand the female obsession with dogs. They’re fine, especially if you have no friends, but they’re not that great
They are that great.
Show him up, Lewis.
Of course Mugbull doesn't like dogs.
That name change keeps justifying itself.
He's being unnecessarily abrasive and argumentative on every topic. What the fuck Muggers.
Not liking dogs signposts you as a massive wrong'un. They are bundles of joy and love. You utter prick, Mongbull.
yeah dogs are cool
Dogs are just so stupid. Which is cute for awhile but annoying the longer you’re with one. Birds are where it’s at
Water is wet.
Muggers: no it isn't. Unless everyone else thinks it isn't.
Hopefully this is just a phase you're going through and you're not actually a retard.
Did we ever see the results for Mug's autism test?
I'm not a fan of dogs because two massive ones jumped on me when I was a kid. Not aggressively or anything but it's put me off the vast majority of dogs. Well, at least initially as they can win me round.
My older brother had a great dog though (half golden retriever half something else that I can't remember).
Might open up an Only Fans account x
Went to a Chinese restaurant in Cricklewood tonight and most of it had been booked for a wedding.
Never expected Chinese people to be so loud. They also get making some weird 'woah/hey' noise when doing some group photos.
That's just normal human behaviour. Surprising, I know.
Has Mahow never seen a Chinese person before?
They're the loudest people in the world. Get more than two of them together and everything gets shouted. I think they're like bats. They can't tell each other apart in groups, so they have to recognise people from their voice.