The most awkward/embarrassing things you've done/said

[Jimmy Floyd]

Once, I was donating a cake to a cake stall at an event which was put on to raise money for blind children to play sport. It was taking place in a largeish room with many different stalls, games and tables lined up. Holding this big soggy chocolate cake on a plate in the middle of the room, I couldn't see where the bloody hell I was supposed to put it. I went up to one of the charity volunteer ladies to ask her where the cake stall was. She indicated it was actually right in front of me. 'Oh!' I said, 'I must be blind.'

WHOOPS

You?

[phonics]

In highschool, I went through a phase of saying 'Your mum x' when people had a go. Cue someone telling me that I'll be all alone and me telling them 'Your mum's all alone'. His Dad had died 2 weeks previous.

[SvN]

In highschool, I went through a phase of saying 'Your mum x' when people had a go. Cue someone telling me that I'll be all alone and me telling them 'Your mum's all alone'. His Dad had died 2 weeks previous.

Reminds me of some kid at school taking the piss out of another with typical "your mum" jokes. Someone said to him "Don't say that, his mum is dead"

His response: "So what, I ain't 'fraid of no ghost".

[Spammer]

Last night at college we were doing an exercise with four of us. We went into a spare room and three of us sat on one side of a table and the fourth person - a black guy - sat on the other side. Someone from our side said "Hello there, Lord Sugar" or something along those lines, and I had an almighty urge to blurt out "Hello there Lord BROWN sugar!". That could have been awkward.

I'll come back with a story that actually happened. I'm sure there's a few.

[Lee]

That's superb. :D

SvN

[Dquincy]

Years ago, i said to a mate at college that he was out of order when he didn't buy his mum a mothers day card. Turned out she had died.

I felt awful.

Then i mistakenly did it again to a friend of a friend who's dad had died. Felt bad, again.

[randomlegend]

I've done the "Your mum"; "My mum's dead" thing to a mate on skype when we were gaming. Pretty awkward, the three other people in the call knew and I didn't.

[igor_balis]

People were talking about cheating at a party. I said something along the lines of 'what I don't get is when girls just have absolutely no self respect, and stay loyal to a serial cheater, it is fucking pathetic. just like Carl Andrews and...' and at that very moment I remembered that the girl who had stayed with the nasty cheater Carl Andrews was one of the two people I was fucking talking to. Thankfully she assumed I was making a risky joke rather than being that much of an idiot/cunt, so I just got a 'ha, fuck off sam' and the horror was largely alleviated.

[Samadini]

When I was a kid I used to go round lying about playing the air guitar because I had some kind of greatest air guitar hits CD. Would list people like Brian May and say how they use air guitars too and I could play all their songs. No one ever told me it wasn't a real instrument.

Then when I was about 14 it hit me and I wanted to die.

[Charlie]

When I was a kid I used to go round lying about playing the air guitar because I had some kind of greatest air guitar hits CD. Would list people like Brian May and say how they use air guitars too and I could play all their songs. No one ever told me it wasn't a real instrument.

Then when I was about 14 it hit me and I wanted to die.

That is so good.

Mine is definitely when I was doing some work experience in an architecture office. I was about 17, and it was my first day there. The boss had introduced me, and then throughout the morning people had come over and said hi. 2 people welcome me, I shake their hand then they go off. Then along comes this longhaired guy, Lindsay. Up he trots, "hi, Charlie. I'm Lindsay, nice to meet you." Hand outstretched. I take one look over, begin to laugh, say "nice one," turn away and continue to work. He slowly walks off.

Turns out he's actually called Lindsay and he wasn't just having a laugh and giving a girls name to fuck with the new guy.

[SvN]

I was a nervous wreck during my work experience. I've no idea why, I just had such low confidence at that age (I was about 14) and going to a new environment where I knew noone was a terrifying prospect.

It was arranged by school to be at a local library. On my first day, I wore trousers, a shirt and a tie. I also wore my coat because it was winter. I arrived and met the woman in charge. She instantly gets me to work, but I haven't taken my coat off yet. So I spend the entire day working in my coat because I didn't want to look like I was too scared to take off my coat earlier.

I go on to spend the entire fucking week wearing a shirt and tie to work that's never seen by anyone because I keep my coat on.

Fucking hell.

[Lewis]

The other stories have all been a bit lame, but I lolled out loud at that.

[Charlie]

That is good.

[Dquincy]

SvN :D hahahaha.

[Toby]

That's somehow better than Samadini's story.