The Driving Thread

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

http://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/Ball-Joint-Left-or-Right-Front-Lower-Toyota-Avensis-1997-2003-Rav-4-to-2000-EAP-/231995559395?hash=item3604034de3:g:m8EAAOSwA3dYLd~ Y

Well that's a ball joint for £7.49 each.

Edit: Actually, is that even for the suspension?

[Magic]

It isn't really the parts mate it's the labour. Front springs for my car are only £35. However it's 2 hours to fix so that's £80 if you're lucky.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

It isn't really the parts mate it's the labour. Front springs for my car are only £35. However it's 2 hours to fix so that's £80 if you're lucky.

I know, I'm not expecting to pay parts only.

But when they're charging £6.50 to change a brake light...

[Magic]

I know, really no excuse not to be doing that yourself though mate.

Also I've been looking at cars because I'm a mong, determined my next one will be a black man's willy for around 7k. Probably ex-company car with meticulous FSH or a single owner jobbee.

I won't be getting another car that's any good whilst I have company cars though. Amazing what 7k can buy you.

[Giggles]

Why are you buying a car if you've a company car?

[Magic]

Are you thick?

[Baz]

My company car is branded. :moop:

[Giggles]

Are you thick?

I'm certainly missing something anyway, because I thought you just got a new Golf. Enlighten me.

[Magic]

I know, really no excuse not to be doing that yourself though mate.

Also I've been looking at cars because I'm a mong, determined my next one will be a black man's willy for around 7k. Probably ex-company car with meticulous FSH or a single owner jobbee.

I won't be getting another car that's any good whilst I have company cars though. Amazing what 7k can buy you.

Please see above.

[Giggles]

Please see above.

I read that as that you'll never have another good car unless you buy yourself one as they don't get you good ones.

[Magic]

Then you ought to take some English lessons with your local college.

[Giggles]

I shoud realy.

[Pepe]

Why is Magic buying a car again?

[Alan Shearer The 2nd]

http://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/Ball-Joint-Left-or-Right-Front-Lower-Toyota-Avensis-1997-2003-Rav-4-to-2000-EAP-/231995559395?hash=item3604034de3:g:m8EAAOSwA3dYLd~ Y

Well that's a ball joint for £7.49 each.

Edit: Actually, is that even for the suspension?

Watch out as you can get some cheap shite on ebay if you're not careful, which that most definitely appears to be.

Assuming that is the ball joint that's fucked, here are some- http://www.carparts4less.co.uk/cp4l/c/Toyota_Avensis_1.8_1999/p/car-parts/suspension/suspension-and-steering/suspension-arm-and-suspension-joints/?617820015&1&cfdc51945187b044a707cb916d37562401cea432&000019

At the top left of the arm-

https://s14.postimg.org/lrf6rlw01/615820118.jpg

You can get cheaper but 'buy cheap, buy twice' is a good rule with stuff like this and it's still a load cheaper than what Halfords are quoting- £53 for both with discount code applied. But I'd be checking they are the knackered ones before ordering anything.

[Giggles]

Why is Magic buying a car again?

Work keeps buying him shit ones so he's getting a BMW.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Got my car back (although I need to take it back to the crooks for the free retest) and it only cost £80 for the repairs.

[Jimmy Floyd]

I am now the proud owner of a Skoda Octavia. Taking it for a test drive with the salesman as my first ever drive with a full licence was a bit lol though. 'Erm... looks like it goes. Must be a great car.'

Insurance though :sick:

[Jimmy Floyd]

My early driving career suggests that everyone drives 20mph too fast at all times (vans and silly 4x4s 40mph too fast).

What's the point of even having speed limits?

[Giggles]

How are you finding the car?

[Adamski]

My early driving career suggests that everyone drives 20mph too fast at all times (vans and silly 4x4s 40mph too fast).

What's the point of even having speed limits?

Aye that's a pain. I bloody love hogging the outside lane (come at me) and these cunts doing 90 just ruin it for everyone.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

I don't know how people can stick to the limits, they're so damn slow and it's boring.

[Jimmy Floyd]

How are you finding the car?

Decent. Drives very smoothly, clutch very forgiving and to be honest I was sold when I got the dealer to look up the records and this model was in the first month's worth of production to have a timing chain as opposed to the stupid belt :drool:

This is the boat in question:

http://cdn2.carbuyer.co.uk/sites/carbuyer_d7/files/car_images/skoda-octavia-cutout-2017.jpg

[Magic]

Aye that's a pain. I bloody love hogging the outside lane (come at me) and these cunts doing 90 just ruin it for everyone.

Stop fishing.

[Giggles]

Decent. Drives very smoothly, clutch very forgiving and to be honest I was sold when I got the dealer to look up the records and this model was in the first month's worth of production to have a timing chain as opposed to the stupid belt :drool:

This is the boat in question:

http://cdn2.carbuyer.co.uk/sites/carbuyer_d7/files/car_images/skoda-octavia-cutout-2017.jpg

Very nice. A lot of people don't like the split headlight facelift but I think it really suits them. Beaut of a car.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Only 6 days into the new car before one of the local thugs smashes one of the wing mirrors in.

One of those crimes that the police couldn't give less of a shit about and there is no way of either preventing it or catching the perpetrators.

[CJay]

That sucks. My mate had his car jimmied open and the CD player taken from it twice in the space of a year in Belfast.

[Alan Shearer The 2nd]

People still steal CD players?

[CJay]

People still steal CD players?

Apparently so. It wasn't even a particularly great piece of equipment.

[phonics]

Jimmys no claims being fucked over in 6 days is quite impressive.

[Disco]

Why would you claim for a wing mirror? Just get another one and replace it yourself.

[phonics]

So you get it for free?

[Disco]

Yes.

[Spikey M]

As if Jimmy would know how to replace a wing mirror.

[phonics]

His butler will.

[Magic]

Excess might be high. Plus electric/heated mirrors ramps up costs.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Claim for a wing mirror? Might as well claim for bird shit on the bonnet.

[Giggles]

You'll pay more in the long term by claiming.

[Alan Shearer The 2nd]

Yeah it'd have to be a fair prang to be worth claiming.

[Greg]

Aussie cred has gone through the roof. :cool:

https://s23.postimg.org/td2w0rm6j/20170423_171243.jpg

[Spikey M]

Just booked my driving test. Mid-July was the earliest I could get, what a load of shit.

[Magic]

Aussie cred has gone through the roof. :cool:

https://s23.postimg.org/td2w0rm6j/20170423_171243.jpg

Fucking hell. :drool:

[Jimmy Floyd]

Had the car completely smashed up over Saturday night. Two windows through, two more attempted, few dents, both wingmirrors done. Probably borks my insurance for the next 20 years.

Police couldn't give less of a shit either about the specific crime, or about the wider issue of drugged up children in the area. Three local shops/restaurants and plenty more cars got done the same night.

[Giggles]

The fuck? Is it a bad area or is some cunt just taking offence to the new car?

[Jimmy Floyd]

It's a nice area but there is a known posse of 15 year olds (I even know some of the names) who do drugs every night and smash things up. I think I've just been hideously unlucky.

[Magic]

Can we get some hate for those fuckers that slow down when overtaking in the fast lane, then go back in and speed up? Cunts.

[Giggles]

It's a nice area but there is a known posse of 15 year olds (I even know some of the names) who do drugs every night and smash things up. I think I've just been hideously unlucky.

That's shit. Hopefully they overdose or something soon.

[Giggles]

Can we get some hate for those fuckers that slow down when overtaking in the fast lane, then go back in and speed up? Cunts.

All the hate is reserved for imbeciles that think there's a 'fast lane' in the first place.

[Magic]

All the hate is reserved for imbeciles that think there's a 'fast lane' in the first place.Overtaking lane, then.

[Giggles]

Overtaking lane, then.

Then yes, they are indeed cunts.

[Adamski]

I know it's not correct for highway code wankers but I love the outside lane. Fuck having to switch between the two or move over when someone comes on a slip road, I just want to put cruise control on and stay where I am.

I love just sitting in that lane and if someone comes behind me wanting past I just move in and then back out again, Added seethe this creates makes it even more worth it.

[Magic]

I know it's not correct for highway code wankers but I love the outside lane. Fuck having to switch between the two or move over when someone comes on a slip road, I just want to put cruise control on and stay where I am.

I love just sitting in that lane and if someone comes behind me wanting past I just move in and then back out again,

Classic cuntery. And it's no surprise it comes from someone as arrogant as yourself.

[Adamski]

Doesn't really do anyone any harm, if people want to overtake then I move over for them.

[Magic]

Doesn't really do anyone any harm, if people want to overtake then I move over for them.

It does, because there will be quite a few occasions where you aren't paying attention and hold someone up. Also really bad practice. There's absolutely no requirement to use that outside lane unless you're overtaking or letting someone in from a slip. Outrageous behaviour.

[Giggles]

Nobody should ever have to move over to allow merging if people know how to drive anyway.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Currently going through CCTV footage myself because apparently crime investigation is self service now. Thanks, Theresa May.

[Boydy]

Vote Labour.

[CJay]

Currently going through CCTV footage myself because apparently crime investigation is self service now. Thanks, Theresa May.

How did you get the footage?

[Jimmy Floyd]

As solutions go that's like tripping on a banana skin and responding by nuking the southern hemisphere.

[Jimmy Floyd]

How did you get the footage?

Private cameras installed at the allotment trading shed nearby. Power to the people.

I've just fucking found crystal clear footage of them doing it as well. Like CSI Seoul this morning.

[Adamski]

It does, because there will be quite a few occasions where you aren't paying attention and hold someone up. Also really bad practice. There's absolutely no requirement to use that outside lane unless you're overtaking or letting someone in from a slip. Outrageous behaviour.

Tried the 'highway code way' today. Added 10-15 minutes onto my journey stuck behind lorries and buses doing 50 on a 70 while a large portion of cars sped up in the good lane meaning I couldn't get out to overtake. Mugs game.

[Greg]

You must be a woeful driver if you aren't alert enough to move over before you get stuck. Stick to the bus.

[Adamski]

Stick to drink driving, prisoner.

[Magic]

Tried the 'highway code way' today. Added 10-15 minutes onto my journey stuck behind lorries and buses doing 50 on a 70 while a large portion of cars sped up in the good lane meaning I couldn't get out to overtake. Mugs game.

I think you're actually a woman.

[Adamski]

Would you have a problem with a woman earning more than you?

[Magic]

No, it's a good thing you don't either.

[ScousePig]

Doesn't really do anyone any harm, if people want to overtake then I move over for them.

Every person that approaches behind you thinks you're a cunt. And that you can't drive.

[Adamski]

And everyone here knows you get bullied by kids and have a women's job.

We're all fighting our own battles buddy.

[ScousePig]

Private cameras installed at the allotment trading shed nearby. Power to the people.

I've just fucking found crystal clear footage of them doing it as well. Like CSI Seoul this morning.

That's class. I can't remember if I mentioned it in the other thread but some kids damaged a car across the road last week which one of the neighbours supposedly caught on camera, and in fairness the police have been making their presence known.

[ScousePig]

And everyone here knows you get bullied by kids and have a women's job.

We're all fighting our own battles buddy.

:D

[-james-]

Failed. :moop:

Going up a road that's all parked cars on the left, get asked to turn right. There was room right at the end to join the left lane but I tried to just turn right straight away, and there was a car in the road I was turning into turning left.

That was five minutes in and I knew I'd fucked it. Got four minors for the rest of the drive. Raging.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Hard luck. The test is the fucking weirdest thing ever. Christ knows why it's so nerve racking.

I've got driving pretty much sorted now, but parking, nah. Literally can't do it. I just fundamentally don't have the spatial awareness to understand how reverse gear works. Any tips for mongs like me?

[Magic]

So pulling in to a petrol station this morning my oil light came on. Sure enough, dry as a bone. Talk about good timing (we're supposed to do these stupid weekly checks which nobody does to avoid this stuff).

15,000 miles and it's used all it's oil. Great, apparently it's 20,000 for a service. Had to spend a tenner on oil which I'll be claiming back. Fucking piece of German shit.

[phonics]

A tenner? That's the family not eating tonight.

[Magic]

I'm even in the bank but £700 down on the credit card. :(

[phonics]

Weren't you 200 down last week? I spend my money on alcohol and hard drugs and have better control of my finances.

[Magic]

Weren't you 200 down last week? I spend my money on alcohol and hard drugs and have better control of my finances.

Yeah but it's delayed updating, about 4 days behind. I thought I was better off than I was. /r/suicide

[Alan Shearer The 2nd]

Car engine in burning oil shocker.

[Magic]

The 20k mile service interval should be amended. I'm not a fucking lackey having to top up my own oil. Disgrace.

[Giggles]

You shouldn't be allowed a car if you can't dip oil.

[phonics]

If your oil is burning out 5000 miles faster than it should that's from your own style of driving. If you're on high revs the whole time, you'll burn more oil.

[Magic]

You shouldn't be allowed a car if you can't dip oil.

I was like a woman. Took me 20 minutes of manual reading before I knew which kind to buy.

5-what?
10-WHAT?

I'm doomed!

[Magic]

If your oil is burning out 5000 miles faster than it should that's from your own style of driving. If you're on high revs the whole time, you'll burn more oil.

If in doubt, flat out. :drool:

NB: unless it's your own car.

[phonics]

Yeah then you can't complain about having to pay for your own oil.

'Drive like a knob, cost you a few bob.'

[niko_cee]

When you top up oil do you essentially just pour it into the engine block?

[phonics]

When you top up oil do you essentially just pour it into the engine block?

Every car I've done it on just had a big cap labelled 'Engine Oil'

[Magic]

When you top up oil do you essentially just pour it into the engine block?

Yes.

[Magic]

Yeah then you can't complain about having to pay for your own oil.

'Drive like a knob, cost you a few bob.'

I claimed it back.

[Spikey M]

I passed my test on Wednesday of last week. I completely went to bits and racked up 6 minors in the first 10 minutes. I then had reversing around a corner as my manoeuvre, which I have always found a piece of piss, but I went out far to wide, had to drive back round to correct it, then came in to quickly, nearly curbed it and had to put the handbrake on before I went full retard. I sorted it out in the end but I thought I had failed. I then drove more or less perfectly for the rest of the test - pressure off as thought I had failed anyway - and was passed with 7 minors.

So we went and got a car on Canvey Island (:drool:) on Saturday. 2003 Ford Fiesta Ghia, 1 owner, 83000 miles. I then shat the bed completely on the drive home. I don't know Canvey at all, and it has a shit double roundabout after getting off of it. Then, I got stuck at lights on a hill and sat stalling it for the entirety of a green light. Turns out the car I learnt in had hill start assist, mine does not. I eventually got it moving and jumped a red light in the process rather than stopping again. I got home a shaking, sweaty mess. Horrible.

I've got it sorted now, worked out the revs for hill starts etc, but that was an absolute ordeal.

[Pepe]

I was like a woman. Took me 20 minutes of manual reading before I knew which kind to buy.

5-what?
10-WHAT?

I'm doomed!

:D

Also lol at spikey.

[Baz]

My car is in for MOT (new car due in Sept) and the courtesy car is a minute Fiesta with an engine fit for nothing. Motorways haven't been fun so far. :sick:

[Spikey M]

I bumped a parked car this morning while trying to park. It was only slight bumper to bumper contact and there is no damage but I am now shitting bricks. Fuck this driving shit.

[Disco]

That's how you work out how much room there is.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

It's why bumpers are there.

[wullie]

My proven technique to avoid little bumps like that is to not have attempted a parallel park since my driving test.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Indeed. It always freaked me out.

[Spikey M]

I live on a ridiculously busy road and have no drive way. There was a space so I had to grab it. Seriously considering moving house / never driving again so that I never have to do it again.

[phonics]

Parallel parking was the easiest thing for me. Once you learn the technique of aligning yourself with other cars you can practically do it on feel alone. However, I couldn't merge with a 2 lane roundabout so we all have our weaknesses.

[wullie]

If I didn't have either a drive or an assigned space I honestly think the anxiety I'd feel every time I drove home would eventually send me into a nervous breakdown. Whenever I have to parallel I actually do alright but I really don't trust it even though I know the technique is sound.

[Giggles]

No point in learning now as pretty soon most cars will park themselves.

But yeah, like Wullie I'd have severe parking anxiety. Couldn't live somewhere I didn't have my own space. Now that I've taught the neighbour it's all going swimmingly too.

[Magic]

Not parallel parking is a sure fire way to destroy your alloys.

Bunch of queers.

Also congrats on passing your test @spikey

Also RIP.

[Adramelch]

It's all a matter of habit surely. I've had to parallel park almost every day for the best part of a decade and it's just second nature.

[Pepe]

Don't you take months worth of classes? How the fuck can you not park?

[Spikey M]

I can park. In lessons they just don't use packed inner-city streets to teach you.

[Adramelch]

I used to live in a pretty steep downslope, so I had to learn proper parallel parking using the handbrake and whatnot, it was quite the ordeal. Not to mention my first car was an Opel Agila, which has one of the shittiest transmissions I've encountered in a car (some of it was due to wear and tear, but a lot of it was by "construction").

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Don't you take months worth of classes? How the fuck can you not park?

They always find a spot between 2 cars, which has enough room for a bus, on a quiet road.

It teaches the mechanics without any of the stress which is stupid.

[Disco]

You would rather the alternative?

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

To start, no.

But one you've got the technique down they should teach you how to park in a town centre.

[Magic]

Is parking really a problem for you lot? Weirdos.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Yeah but we can go into a kebab shop.

[Spikey M]

We don't all live in highland villages.

[Disco]

Yeah but we can go into a kebab shop.

He can go in, he just needs to take an extra bag for teeth and bits of his face.

[Magic]

Parking is like the easiest bit of driving ffs.

[Spikey M]

Motorways are the easiest bit.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Parking tight is the hardest bit of driving. Anything that involves going in a straight line for ages is the easiest bit.

[Magic]

Motorways are the easiest bit.

Apparently not to some morons.

The hardest bits are rush hours in unfamiliar huge cities, and that's mostly city centre or some sort of bypass/internal motorway.

[CJay]

That Spikey story is proper lol. Getting stuck stalling on a hill? After you've passed? :cab:

Congrats on passing anyway. And on surviving so far.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Surely on the hill starts, if worst comes to worst you just floor the right foot.

I was insecure on stuff for about a month after passing, but now it all comes pretty easily. The main danger on the roads - around here anyway - is mothers driving 4x4s. I got one hooting at me and angrily gesticulating this morning because I wouldn't try and ping past a huge construction vehicle which was driving across two lanes, and I'm sure this delayed her hugely important journey.

[Magic]

Oh yeah Spike what kind of car have you got?

[Spikey M]

That Spikey story is proper lol. Getting stuck stalling on a hill? After you've passed? :cab:

Congrats on passing anyway. And on surviving so far.

I learnt in a car with hill start assist. I thought all cars went the same way on hills.

[Spikey M]

Oh yeah Spike what kind of car have you got?

2003 Fiesta.

[Magic]

Petrol/diesel?

[Spikey M]

Petrol. 1.4

[Magic]

What the fuck is 'hill assist'? :D

Petrol clutches are always more difficult to grasp, diesel's you can normally pull away without even using the accelerator.

[Spikey M]

"The hill-start assist is a variant of hill-holder used by some semi-automatic, clutchless transmissions as well as newer manual transmissions. The system prevents the car from rolling away when trying to pull away on an up or down gradient, simulating a "handbrake hill start" manual drivers will be familiar with. The system engages automatically when a gradient of 3% or more is detected; it then acts to hold the car stationary for two seconds after the brake is released giving the driver time to apply the throttle."

It did also pull away with just the clutch.

Why you would have that when the vast majority of new drivers won't be able to buy a car with that in it is beyond me.

[Adramelch]

"The hill-start assist is a variant of hill-holder used by some semi-automatic, clutchless transmissions as well as newer manual transmissions. The system prevents the car from rolling away when trying to pull away on an up or down gradient, simulating a "handbrake hill start" manual drivers will be familiar with. The system engages automatically when a gradient of 3% or more is detected; it then acts to hold the car stationary for two seconds after the brake is released giving the driver time to apply the throttle."

It did also pull away with just the clutch.

Why you would have that when the vast majority of new drivers won't be able to buy a car with that in it is beyond me.

Because they want to have higher success numbers and a better car helps with that I assume.

[Giggles]

What the fuck is 'hill assist'? :D

Petrol clutches are always more difficult to grasp, diesel's you can normally pull away without even using the accelerator.

The Mrs has hill assist. Just means the brake holds for 3 seconds/you accelerate, after you let it off.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

I'm not sure if the one I learnt in had that. I never had a problem with hill starts.

[wullie]

The hardest part of driving is being at a small roundabout with someone coming from the right, their turning left without indicating, and you resisting the urge to follow them home and smash their windows.

[Giggles]

I remember rolling backwards down the main street of a big town and going straight through a junction so I wouldn't have to stop on a hill in my first week of driving, but once you get it it's a piece of piss.

[Spikey M]

All sorted now anyway, pretty simple to put the throttle down, just throws you when you haven't had to previously. Especially when the cunt starts rolling backwards.

[Jimmy Floyd]

The hardest part of driving is being at a small roundabout with someone coming from the right, their turning left without indicating, and you resisting the urge to follow them home and smash their windows.

Not indicating at roundabouts should mean instant and permanent loss of licence.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

I was always able to sit still on a hill using the clutch.

I've never used my handbrake on a hill outside of driving lessons too.

[Magic]

Using the clutch to maintain position on a hill? Fuck me. :face:

Handbrake > bite > handbrake off > accelerate.

Simple! If you're really good you can pop the handbrake and move away without rolling back like a true pro.

[Jimmy Floyd]

You could hold it on the clutch for a couple of seconds in crawling traffic, but if you're doing it at red lights that's just bad driving.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Using the clutch to maintain position on a hill? Fuck me. :face:

Handbrake > bite > handbrake off > accelerate.

Simple! If you're really good you can pop the handbrake and move away without rolling back like a true pro.

I said I can do it, I don't though.

I just use the regular brake.

[Spikey M]

My current method is: clutch to bite > revs to 2000 > handbreak off > clutch up whilst flooring it and terrifying any pedestrians.

[Magic]

I hate 'auto' things but I've been using my auto-hold recently, which is pretty funky.

[Magic]

You can always spot a learner:

1. Car tilts back because clutch is wanting to pull but handbrake still on
2. Loud engine revving noise as revs exceed 4k RPM
3. Launch control F&F 7 activated and pull off like a GTR
4. Bogs down because misses gear or takes ages to engage
5. Hedge

[Baz]

Dropped the courtesy back off with '3 miles to 0' amount of petrol in it. :cool:

[Jimmy Floyd]

I've never even looked at my rev counter. I must just be a natural talent. A natural talent who passed his test at 28.

[Magic]

Dropped the courtesy back off with '3 miles to 0' amount of petrol in it. :cool:

Lol @ you when they have to top it up and charge you about £3 a litre because of 'service'.

[Alan Shearer The 2nd]

I think one of the oddest things I've seen are drivers riding back and forward on the clutch at a red light that's not going to change for an age. Just take it out of gear and put the handbrake on you utter twat.

Shouldn't be allowed near a car.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

I've never even looked at my rev counter. I must just be a natural talent. A natural talent who passed his test at 28.

My first car didn't even have one.

Speedometer on the left and a clock on the right.

[Magic]

My first car didn't even have one.

Speedometer on the left and a clock on the right.

Same. 4 gears. :cool:

It wasn't a mk2 Polo, was it?

[Disco]

The first car I drove only had one wing mirror.

[Adramelch]

I once drove a rental car, which they basically never gave out but we needed a car, they were fully booked and one of us knew the owner so we struck sort of a deal with him about this one. It was an Opel Corsa, where the clock was stuck on 1992 so it must have been older than that or around that age. The clutch was definitely not the original one as it extended up to very close to the wheel (like a truck clutch or something), the driver mirror was shattered in 7-8 pieces and was held together with some sort of tape. Steering the wheel needed proper strength (but ok most old cars are like that), one of the windows needed you to punch the door for it to start going up and down (manually ofc, nothing electrical). Was quite the experience, especially coupled with the fact it was in Crete and a big part of the highway has no lighting or any sort of reflectors. Thankfully the car had the one important thing, strong lights.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Same. 4 gears. :cool:

It wasn't a mk2 Polo, was it?
A 1995 1.1 Peugeot 106 Aztec.

The moment I got up to 100mph on it was amazing and very short. It was shaking like a bastard, I thought it was going to turn to rubble.

[Baz]

Lol @ you when they have to top it up and charge you about £3 a litre because of 'service'.

Company car innit. Arnold Clark'll pay.

[Magic]

A 1995 1.1 Peugeot 106 Aztec.

The moment I got up to 100mph on it was amazing and very short. It was shaking like a bastard, I thought it was going to turn to rubble.

I got up to 90mph in my 1992 VW Polo 1.0 before I bottled it. In 4th lol. Of course speedo said 90, it was probably more like 35mph.

[Spikey M]

I drove my dads 3 wheeler around a field when I was about 8. Checkmate, Atheitits.

[Magic]

Was tailgaiting some dumb student bitch because she wasn't moving over to the inside lane despite there being miles before the next car she would be overtaking going a measly 73MPH.

I could see her little limp wrist waving aimlessly as if to shoo me away, like a middle-class white male, and true to form, I drove so far up her bumper I could basically smell her cunt. She finally did move over, and a fantastic, slow shake of the head sent her in to hyperseethe. Fucking anti-fox hunting dyke.

Far more effective than any Vs, or shouting or swearing.

[Adamski]

I love seeing little melts like you in my rear mirror waving your Highway Code.

No fucks given :cool:

[Giggles]

Was tailgaiting some dumb student bitch because she wasn't moving over to the inside lane despite there being miles before the next car she would be overtaking going a measly 73MPH.

I could see her little limp wrist waving aimlessly as if to shoo me away, like a middle-class white male, and true to form, I drove so far up her bumper I could basically smell her cunt. She finally did move over, and a fantastic, slow shake of the head sent her in to hyperseethe. Fucking anti-fox hunting dyke.

Far more effective than any Vs, or shouting or swearing.

Running the cunt into the central wall would be too good for her like.

[Magic]

I love seeing little melts like you in my rear mirror waving your Highway Code.

No fucks given :cool:

I don't, I just sit there, far too close, looking dead ahead with my terminator glasses, then shake the head as I roar past in my 1.0l Golf Estate.

[Giggles]

You see it lots here but I always thought you had competent traffic police to cut out that sort of fuckwittery.

[Magic]

You see it lots here but I always thought you had competent traffic police to cut out that sort of fuckwittery.

Are you joking they are more interested in people going 1MPH over the speed limit.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

I love the little head shake after overtaking a pleb.

[Jimmy Floyd]

The best way to deal with tailgating cunts is to slow down even more.

[Magic]

Unless you've got your P plates on you'll be getting it hard as well you learner cunt.

[Magic]

Got flashed doing 48 in a 40. They'd changed the speed limit just last month from 60. Bastards. Unfamiliar area.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

:harold:

[Spikey M]

Anyone tailgating me will be rewarded with a terrific and swift reduction in speed.

[Giggles]

You knew it was 40 though as you'd never have been doing by 48 in a 60.

[Magic]

Tbf I did see 40 signs but it was through roadworks so I sped up to 60 and slowly started to slow down even though the national sign was straight after the camera so I think 48 was the speed I went through at.

Didn't realise they'd clocked the GATSO down to 40 as well.

[Alan Shearer The 2nd]

Where was that?

[Magic]

Tyrebagger.

[Foe]

Car behind me on the way home from work decided she didn't fancy stopping at the roundabout which means she smashed into the back of my car. Back bumper is fucked, parking sensors didn't seem to be working and boot has a big old dent. :moop:

Also got a sore back and neck now. :(

[Giggles]

That's the spirit. If you lived here that would be worth at least 25 grand.

[Magic]

Car behind me on the way home from work decided she didn't fancy stopping at the roundabout which means she smashed into the back of my car. Back bumper is fucked, parking sensors didn't seem to be working and boot has a big old dent. :moop:

Also got a sore back and neck now. :(

Was it sunny?

[Spikey M]

Funding your boiler repair with a dodgy Whiplash claim. :nono:

[Giggles]

For the London heads: What are Go Bus like? They're taking over 23 routes from Dublin Bus later this year. I'd be hoping the service can't get any shitter than it is but you never know.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Someone smashed the fuck out of our minibus this weekend and had no idea who as it was parked at home and no note was left.

One of our neighbours has security cameras though and we found out it was an old Indian delivery guy who reversed the fuck into it. He's denying it was him (he doesn't know about the cameras) even though his car is smashed to shit too.

Mum doesn't want to report him but if he doesn't pay up (or get the insurance involved) I've talked her into phoning them up.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Winter driving noob question: today it's a bit colder than it has been, and when I set off for work the windscreen wouldn't stop steaming up. First of all I had to have the wipers on to see through it (clear blue day) and then eventually after I had whacked all the heating/aircon settings in turn, it slightly improved. What would cause that to happen?

[Spikey M]

Someone smashed the fuck out of our minibus this weekend and had no idea who as it was parked at home and no note was left.

One of our neighbours has security cameras though and we found out it was an old Indian delivery guy who reversed the fuck into it. He's denying it was him (he doesn't know about the cameras) even though his car is smashed to shit too.

Mum doesn't want to report him but if he doesn't pay up (or get the insurance involved) I've talked her into phoning them up.

Why the fuck would you not report it? Fuck whether he pays or not.

[Magic]

Probably no insurance dodgy Polaks.

[Alan Shearer The 2nd]

Winter driving noob question: today it's a bit colder than it has been, and when I set off for work the windscreen wouldn't stop steaming up. First of all I had to have the wipers on to see through it (clear blue day) and then eventually after I had whacked all the heating/aircon settings in turn, it slightly improved. What would cause that to happen?

High heat with air con on is what you want. People forget the air con also dries the air. Make sure the air re-circulation button isn't on though as that will make things worse.

If you get a lot of bother with moisture one of these will help-

http://www.halfords.com/motoring/car-accessories/interior-car-accessories/thomar-vehicle-dehumidifier

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Why the fuck would you not report it? Fuck whether he pays or not.

My Mum is too kind at times.

[Disco]

Winter driving noob question: today it's a bit colder than it has been, and when I set off for work the windscreen wouldn't stop steaming up. First of all I had to have the wipers on to see through it (clear blue day) and then eventually after I had whacked all the heating/aircon settings in turn, it slightly improved. What would cause that to happen?

I'm guessing we've all set off before the windscreen has cleared properly, driving while leaning forward peering through a tiny hole in the condensation should be part of the test.

[Giggles]

You might need a new cabin (pollen) filter too if it's steaming up badly Jimmy Floyd.

[Jimmy Floyd]

I'm guessing we've all set off before the windscreen has cleared properly, driving while leaning forward peering through a tiny hole in the condensation should be part of the test.

Being a noob I set off before I even realised it was a problem, so I spent most of the journey to work jabbing Czech piece of shit buttons that don't do anything.

[mugbull]

Being a noob I set off before I even realised it was a problem, so I spent most of the journey to work jabbing Czech piece of shit buttons that don't do anything.

:cool:

[Magic]

Drove in to the back of some stupid old cunt who needs driving lessons clearly.

[Spikey M]

The order of the collision seems to imply the opposite Maggie.

[Magic]

I thought my reflexes were boss as well but I was caught so off guard by how shocking her driving was I simply didn't react in time.

[Pepe]

You were on the phone, weren't you?

[Magic]

So after my lolworthy flash by a non-working camera http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-41869134

I'm pretty sure, unless by some miracle the OPERATING OFFICER was picking his beak or something, that I've been caught doing 90 (85GPS) going up the A9 today, at a place where I've never seen a camera before.

RIP.

[wullie]

Had a major service done on the 206 and they phoned up to ask if the cambelt was new. They advised that they should be replaced every 10 years so it would need doing just because and combined with the other advisory things it would be a quote of £800. That's hit the point where the cost of repairs is more than the value of the car so RIP my old friend, you're going to a big car park in the sky. We had joy, we had fun, we had seasons in the sun

[SincereTheRebel]

Any motorcycle riders in here? My friend has just bought a bike with all the flashy leather clothes and safety equipment. Ive never seen anyone where one before, but why dont motorcycle people ride around wearing a cape?

[Disco]

There's a pretty obvious drawback.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Drove my sister and her husband to the furthest reaches of inner London at the weekend, after they came back from their honeymoon (we live near Heathrow). I don't think there is anything worse than London driving. Total ambiguity about what lane you're meant to be in, a lot of drug dealers/red light jumpers everywhere, knobhead cyclists, and massive aggression from all your fellow road users.

The low point was getting hooted at by a double decker bus because I wasn't diving into a gap that simply wasn't there. I started explaining to the gentleman bus driver that perhaps were he to return to the land of his forefathers he might find road etiquette there more to his taste.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Drove my sister and her husband to the furthest reaches of inner London at the weekend, after they came back from their honeymoon (we live near Heathrow). I don't think there is anything worse than London driving. Total ambiguity about what lane you're meant to be in, a lot of drug dealers/red light jumpers everywhere, knobhead cyclists, and massive aggression from all your fellow road users.

The low point was getting hooted at by a double decker bus because I wasn't diving into a gap that simply wasn't there. I started explaining to the gentleman bus driver that perhaps were he to return to the land of his forefathers he might find road etiquette there more to his taste.

Barcelona is worse and I refused to drive in Paris because I know it's worse.

[Giggles]

Poland was the worst I've found for speeding and aggression when I was commuting for a few weeks from Krakow to Gliwice, though I've never had the joys of central London.

The driving here is just a mixture of idiocy and pig ignorance.

[SvN]

The taxi I took in Tunisia about 10 years ago was the most terrifying experience of my life.

[Disco]

Drove my sister and her husband to the furthest reaches of inner London at the weekend, after they came back from their honeymoon (we live near Heathrow). I don't think there is anything worse than London driving. Total ambiguity about what lane you're meant to be in, a lot of drug dealers/red light jumpers everywhere, knobhead cyclists, and massive aggression from all your fellow road users.

The low point was getting hooted at by a double decker bus because I wasn't diving into a gap that simply wasn't there. I started explaining to the gentleman bus driver that perhaps were he to return to the land of his forefathers he might find road etiquette there more to his taste.

Going into Richmond and back out again is about my limit.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Oh I'm talking Britain rather than forrin lands. One YouTube search for Russian dashcam compilations should be enough for anyone to avoid visiting that country on wheels.

[Giggles]

Oh I'm talking Britain rather than forrin lands. One YouTube search for Russian dashcam compilations should be enough for anyone to avoid visiting that country on wheels.

Oxford was an experience. Definitely a town that allows cars but doesn't really want them.

[Disco]

Have to say though, that bit of the M3 they spent a thousand years working on is rather nice now.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Poland was the worst I've found for speeding and aggression when I was commuting for a few weeks from Krakow to Gliwice, though I've never had the joys of central London.

The driving here is just a mixture of idiocy and pig ignorance.
Yeah, Poland is pretty fucking bad.

A taxi in Turkey was my worst experience. Guy was going through red lights and going into lanes of oncoming traffic to get a better driving line round corners.

[Danny]

The taxi I took in Tunisia about 10 years ago was the most terrifying experience of my life.

India for me. No such thing as lanes out there.

[Spikey M]

Check engine light came on again so I took the car in to have the spark plugs changed. £35. Fiesta life, yo. :drool:

[Giggles]

:drool:

€130k of fines dished out for thieving cunts.

https://www.rte.ie/news/ireland/2017/1120/921544-m50-fines/

[Magic]

I drove to Norwich today. It was excellent apart from the last 120 miles. Fuck the A17 and A47.

[wullie]

Got the new Fiesta yesterday. I'm used to a dash with little more than temp, hazards, lights and wipers and now I've got something out of Minority Report in front of me.

[Giggles]

I love the inside of new Fords. The Mondeo and big Kuga (can't recall the name) are class.

[Pepe]

The carshares here are either Fusions or Priuses. The Fusion's interior is really good looking, but not very intuitive. The Prius has a much simpler system but it is way easier to use. The exterior is ugly as fuck though.

[Giggles]

:cool: Lessons

http://www.stickybottle.com/latest-news/deliveroo-cyclist-taxi-dublin/

[Spikey M]

That poor Balti in his backpack :(

[Jimmy Floyd]

Right so my car is rattling rather than starting (won't fire up basically). Reckon it's a flat battery but then stuff like the headlights still works. Is it a flat battery?

[Pepe]

Probably. Push-start it.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Hard to do in a supermarket car park (or as if I'd know how to do it anyway), so the recovery men are coming out in 3 hours. Happy days.

[Pepe]

Do the headlights get dimmer when you turn the ignition? If yes, then the battery should be the culprit.

[Jimmy Floyd]

It was the battery. Got a new one. Happy days. Thought it would be a part I've never heard of, which is most of them.

[Spikey M]

Is ‘Happy Days’ your new thing?

[Jimmy Floyd]

I've been saying it irl for decades. No idea how much it seeps onto here. lol, just noticed it's in two straight posts, only one of them sarcastic.

[Pepe]

:D

[Giggles]

Happy days is my thing. Though everyone says it here.

[Baz]

Happy days is my thing. Though everyone says it here.Ever had one though? :stamford:

[Giggles]

One what?

EDIT: Ah I get you now. Most days when I'm not in traffic or on here :)

[John]

You're here at all times and drive for your job, so that's a big no.

[Giggles]

You're here at all times and drive for your job, so that's a big no.

I'm not here when I'm driving/working/sleeping. And 'in traffic' doesn't mean driving you twonk. 90% of my driving is free and clear. I like that driving.

[Alan Shearer The 2nd]

Boxster sold this morning, great time of year for it too.

After a proper old man barge next. Since my shifts changed I'm commuting in the dark all the time on the main road now, absolutely dull as fuck and a big mobile sofa is called for.

[Lewis]

Third generation 7 Series.

[Giggles]

XJ is the only answer.

[Lewis]

https://www.carandclassic.co.uk/car/C943212

:cool:

[Lewis]

Oh fuck they have some quality stuff:

http://www.thecarwarehouse.co.uk/vehicle/19/toyota-hiace
http://www.thecarwarehouse.co.uk/vehicle/525/mitsubishi-rosa
http://www.thecarwarehouse.co.uk/vehicle/421/triumph
http://www.thecarwarehouse.co.uk/vehicle/475/honda-vamos

:drool:

[Alan Shearer The 2nd]

XJ is actually my first choice. My old man has one and I'd driven it to work for a week earlier this year, so relaxing, most of the things that can wind you up on the road just don't seem to in a car like that.

The e38 (third generation) 7 series is quite difficult to find good examples of these days, lovely looking thing though. The e65 (fourth generation) are nowhere near as handsome but if I could find one that was well maintained I'd consider it. Think I just missed out on this from a fellow pistonheads member-

https://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/BMW-750i-4-8-362bhp-Auto-2005-/253291773148?_trksid=p2047675.l2557&ssPageName=STRK%3AMEBIDX%3AIT&nma=true&si=QI2D%252Bd706YFWCPshH%252BfDwNnUdw4%253D&orig_cvip=true&rt=nc

Outrageous value for money.

[Magic]

535D. :drool:

[Lewis]

My old man had a 1998 740i and it was pretty great at the time. Then the ex-boyfriend of the woman he left my mother for set it on fire. Oh well.

I was looking at these things the other day for no particular reason, and everything they did during the 2000s - when they had that phase of making weird-looking, hit 'n' miss shit - seems rather undervalued. I know people never liked the look of them, but the E60 M5 still has a naturally-aspirated five litre V10 in it (which you won't see in a 'normal' car ever again), and yet they fetch less than otherwise comparable E39 M5 models (didn't you have one of those?).

[Alan Shearer The 2nd]

My old man had a 1998 740i and it was pretty great at the time. Then the ex-boyfriend of the woman he left my mother for set it on fire. Oh well.

I was looking at these things the other day for no particular reason, and everything they did during the 2000s - when they had that phase of making weird-looking, hit 'n' miss shit - seems rather undervalued. I know people never liked the look of them, but the E60 M5 still has a naturally-aspirated five litre V10 in it (which you won't see in a 'normal' car ever again), and yet they fetch less than otherwise comparable E39 M5 models (didn't you have one of those?).

Yeah, best car I've had by far. If I own anything else that can touch it as an all round proposition I'll be doing well.

They're steadily going up although I think a lot of advertised prices are inflated as cars seem to sit for sale for a long time. I bought mine in 2013 at 122k miles for £7400 and sold it to a trader last year for £6850 at 160k miles. The chap that bought it from the trader got in touch with me and said he had spent a further £3k on some preventative engine work (timing chain + guides and the con rod bearings). That's even before sorting out the odd rusty patch though. I didn't want to let it go but it's death by a thousand cuts, they cost a lot to keep in good nick, especially if you're doing ~10k miles a year in one.

Granted I was pretty fussy but to give you an idea of keeping one mechanically on the money, here's a sobering table of mine. Does include an aftermarket exhaust and a set of winter tyres but that doesn't take too much off the final tally-

https://s8.postimg.org/f64c96q11/running_costs.jpg (https://postimages.org/)

The e60 generation and on seem to have no rust issues at all. I've certainly never seen rust on one and they came out in 2003 (2005 for the M5). That's one less worry and as much as I think I'll have to own a V10 at some point, be it M5 or M6, the bills on one of these can make the e39 look comparatively cheap.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

http://www.thecarwarehouse.co.uk/vehicle/87/toyota-bb

Millions of yen spent? So about £40?

[Lewis]

Yeah, dealers seem to be pre-empting any expected price rises, but you have to wonder whether it actually trickles down to things like these big turn of the century BMWs (and their Audi and Mercedes equivalents) the way they eat through tyres and suck up everything else that used to see them depreciate like shit in the first place. I think that 740i cost the old man about eighteen grand in 2001, when it would have been about seventy-odd three years previous. On a similar note, my brother bought a Range Rover in 2010 (one of the early 4.4 turbo diesels), and when he got rid of it about five years later he worked out that - through servicing and depreciation - it had cost him over a thousand quid a month. The only way it makes sense to buy these things new is if you fully intend to run them into the ground over ten years. Otherwise you're just burning money.


http://www.thecarwarehouse.co.uk/vehicle/87/toyota-bb

Millions of yen spent? So about £40?

How much inheritance have you got left?

[Alan Shearer The 2nd]

Range Rover, now there's a tempting one if I'm feeling particularly unhinged and one happens to pop up nearby. Auntie has the 3.6 TDV8 and it's bloody marvellous inside.

My budget would be around the early 4.4 V8, a cracking 17mpg.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Yeah, dealers seem to be pre-empting any expected price rises, but you have to wonder whether it actually trickles down to things like these big turn of the century BMWs (and their Audi and Mercedes equivalents) the way they eat through tyres and suck up everything else that used to see them depreciate like shit in the first place. I think that 740i cost the old man about eighteen grand in 2001, when it would have been about seventy-odd three years previous. On a similar note, my brother bought a Range Rover in 2010 (one of the early 4.4 turbo diesels), and when he got rid of it about five years later he worked out that - through servicing and depreciation - it had cost him over a thousand quid a month. The only way it makes sense to buy these things new is if you fully intend to run them into the ground over ten years. Otherwise you're just burning money.



How much inheritance have you got left?

I'd rather the dog one and then pretend that it's the new TTH van.

[Lewis]

My uncle recently got himself a Discovery 4 and he can't get over how good it is. The new one looking like a swollen Freelander only makes them look even better too.

[Lewis]

I'd rather the dog one and then pretend that it's the new TTH van.

That's a fantastic idea. Let's put that server money down as a deposit.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Lofty could drive it round the country (he'd prefer the train one I suppose but fuck it) taking current members to TTH meets and also putting on recruitment drives.

[Giggles]

535D. :drool:

Absolutely nothing with a D. He's not a farmer.

[Adamski]

Absolutely nothing with a D. He's not a farmer.

They pretty much all are up there.

[Pepe]

I'd take that Audi minivanesque thing. RS4 was it?

[Pepe]

Just realized that all my car knowledge is ten years old.

[Lewis]

They have just brought a new one out, so you're bang up to date.

[Alan Shearer The 2nd]

Going to have a look at this XJ tomorrow-

https://www.autotrader.co.uk/classified/advert/201709299785434?postcode=dd77jy&make=JAGUAR&year-from=2003&radius=1500&fuel-type=Petrol&model=XJ&sort=distance&onesearchad=Used&onesearchad=Nearly%20New&onesearchad=New&price-to=6500&advertising-location=at_cars&page=1

[Foe]

You need to be at least 55 to drive that.

[Magic]

Fuck sake Rossi. Shambles.

[Baz]

You need to be at least 55 to drive that.Yep. The interior is knocking me sick.

[Giggles]

:cool: quality.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Yep. The interior is knocking me sick.

It's vile.

[Giggles]

Do it.

https://www.autotrader.co.uk/classified/advert/201706236730882?sort=sponsored&price-from=500&radius=1500&model=LS%20600H&advertising-location=at_cars&make=LEXUS&onesearchad=Used&onesearchad=Nearly%20New&onesearchad=New&postcode=ph185uw&page=1

[Alan Shearer The 2nd]

Giggles the only one with taste evidently. I bet you're all the sort of schmucks that would have black leather in every single car they've had.

[Pepe]

Those four post steering wheels are usually awful, but apart from that I can't see anything wrong with the interior.