Louis Van Gaal Sacked

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Well not yet, but there are rumblings that the axe is going to fall in no more than 48 hours with Mourinho to take over.

Right move? Well of course it is.

[SvN]

You dickhead

[Mellberg]

Kiko's going to have a breakdown when he sees this.

[Lee]

If Mourinho goes to United within days/weeks of leaving Chelsea and wins them the title the Chelsea seethe will be something to behold.

[John]

I hope you're willing to take on the bill to get Kiko's computer fixed, you nugget.

[Magic]

Poor show.

[Boydy]

It'd be fucking hilarious if Mourinho takes over and does even worse.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Yeah because we've never had pre-emptive threads before.

Robert Mugabe and Paul Ince are still alive ffs.

[John]

SvN. :D

Mourinho getting the bullet at Chelsea actually gives Man Utd the perfect out, if they've been wanting to bin Van Gaal and only haven't to save from admitting they made a cock up. 'There was nobody better available, now there is', and a contract for Mourinho would overshadow anyone looking to bleat about Woodward being a wanker.

[Spoonsky]

Leicester are great, but Mourinho getting sacked by Chelsea and going immediately to United would be the best thing to happen this season.

[mugbull]

Mourinho will come in and guide them to an 8th place finish and everyone will finally get off his dick.

:chief:

[Kikó]

Bring back fergie

[Lewis]

Why were you previously opposed to Jose (might as well start calling him that), Mahow, you e-pimp?

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Why were you previously opposed to Jose (might as well start calling him that), Mahow, you e-pimp?

It was a mix of not appreciating him (I loathed him but he's won me over now) and I just thought that his brand of football would be eye bleedingly shit at United. However, his style can't be worse than Van Gaal's possession bollocks.

[Alan Shearer The 2nd]

He's won you over after his biggest spell of being a brat?

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

He's won you over after his biggest spell of being a brat?

I think it's more just me being used to it now and/or not caring as much.

[niko_cee]

Really got to get this done pronto so he can be in charge for the game on the 28th.

[igor_balis]

Get Bielsa in before Swansea do. Actually, Bielsa would be a quality interim manager to get because if he only had half a season, he wouldn't have time to knacker his players.

[Jimmy Floyd]

If Mourinho does go there I have to just warn United fans about one thing, which people on the outside don't seem to notice - your full backs will never cross the halfway line again.

[Manc]

That's Phil Jones out the door then.

I can actually see Mourinho succeeding with United.

[Lewis]

There isn't really anybody for him to fall out with at United. The 'powerful' players (Rooney and Carrick) are almost done, there isn't a Director of Football to speak of, and the owners aren't all that overbearing. I suppose Ryan Giggs might get the arse if Rui Faria nicks his sitting and doing nothing brief, but fuck him.

[Jimmy Floyd]

He'd fall out with anyone upstairs who started telling him what to do, which they would. They're like New Labour ministers.

Also Bobby Charlton hates him.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Bobby Charlton probably hates all foreigners though.

[Lewis]

Ferguson seems to be the only person in football/in the world he defers to, so he could calm him down/have Bobby Charlton killed if it came to it. It's perfect. The only concern is how you will hold up should it happen. If you're going to have a MELTDOWN, have it on Twitter and don't tarnish your memory here.

[Kikó]

Giggs will be gone by boxing day so that's another worry out of the way.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Ferguson seems to be the only person in football/in the world he defers to, so he could calm him down/have Bobby Charlton killed if it came to it. It's perfect. The only concern is how you will hold up should it happen. If you're going to have a MELTDOWN, have it on Twitter and don't tarnish your memory here.

I said last time that they weren't going to appoint him when everyone (including Mourinho himself) was convinced they were, and sure enough they appointed Moyes and Jose had a serious MELTDOWN before turning up at Chelsea with his tail between his legs. If they appoint him this time it'll be out of pure desperation.

[simon]

Juan Mata must be seething.

[Kikó]

Jim- you seem to credit the board or Ed with any sort of planning it forward thinking. It's all big names, big plans and ultimately big failure.

[Dquincy]

Mahow - sort out the fucking title of this thread. He's not sacked, you mug.

[Boom-Boom]

Giggs will be gone by boxing day so that's another worry out of the way.

I've been reading Red Cafe recently and there's a lot of hate for Giggs which I'm surprised to see.

Why is this?

- Being part of Moyes / LVG's set up?
- Being gifted the job of assistant manager with no real experience?

[John]

Being a bit of a hanger on, presumably. Fan opinion on legendary ex-players will swing incredibly quickly if they get involved in coaching and don't seem to be much cop.

[SvN]

Because redcafe is full of fucking morons. It's essentially become the United equivalent of RAWK since Fergie and success departed.

[Kikó]

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/CWtCeGTWsAIQgNK.jpg

[Giggles]

The Sun :D

[Jimmy Floyd]

He'd supposed to have had dinner with Roma, breakfast with Hiddink... it's amazing he's got time to stroll about in a baseball cap like a divorced dad.

[Reg]

I thought he was holding a gun there for a moment. Could sort of imagine him going on a murderous rampage.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

http://www.independent.co.uk/sport/football/premier-league/louis-van-gaal-set-for-christmas-sack-if-manchester-united-lose-to-stoke-or-chelsea-a6780771.html

Anyone know how legit Ogden is?

[Lee]

I read yesterday that his own representatives had approached United and that he'd told Roma where to go. Roma would be a nice job for him (he's be a hero of Chelsea proportions if he won Serie A there) so I assume he has been told there's a good chance of the United job.

[Reg]

Guardian: van Gaal "may only have two games to save his job". http://www.theguardian.com/football/2015/dec/20/louis-van-gaal-manchester-united-job-jose-mourinho-pep-guardiola

I think if they sacked him, appointed Giggs as interim manager, and offered Pep the job with the budget van Gaal has had then he'd accept.

[Kikó]

Funny how all these stories are popping out at the same time. Almost as if Ed Woodward has been busy.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Of course his representatives have contacted United, he's absolutely gagging for the job. They'll leave van Gaal in a little longer though.

I haven't yet read anything that suggests United are up for it, it all comes from his end.

Chelsea have made a complete cunt of this, shock horror. Always the way once Abramovich starts getting personally involved.

[Reg]

Graham Hunter says Pep wants United then Brazil in 2022 World Cup. http://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/p03c9gn3

[Jimmy Floyd]

What sort of twat flags themselves up as future Brazil manager without having any connections to the country?

[Luca]

http://www.independent.co.uk/sport/football/premier-league/louis-van-gaal-set-for-christmas-sack-if-manchester-united-lose-to-stoke-or-chelsea-a6780771.html

Anyone know how legit Ogden is?

Ogden is, and always has been, reliable. He's not been a mouthpiece anymore since the Fergie days (correct me if I'm wrong, ITKiko), but he's always had well-placed sources and doesn't write total shit.

Even when the things he writes about don't happen (Thiago, Bale), he's written them on solid intel, not pure speculation.

[Boom-Boom]

How impressive has Pep been at Bayern Munich?

Having watched 0 German football I have no real idea how he has got on. I've just had a quick look at their past 5 seasons (league table, cup positions etc.) and from that I'd say he's done a good job but not outstanding. Is that fair?

[niko_cee]

Short of retaking the Sudentenland your options to excel are a bit limited at Bayern.

Getting bummed in the Champion League does push them a bit towards failure corner.

[Luca]

This "we'll sack him if he loses one of the next two" is all a bit bollocks. The horse has clearly bolted; just get it over with. Delaying benefits no one, and only hurts the squad in the long run.

[niko_cee]

Aye. Look at Newcastle. Saw two tough games and made them must wins, and baldy island Mac only went and bloody won them.

[John Arne]

This "we'll sack him if he loses one of the next two" is all a bit bollocks. The horse has clearly bolted; just get it over with. Delaying benefits no one, and only hurts the squad in the long run.

That's just paper shite though, the board won't have actually given him that ultimatum.

Either way, they are 4pts off 2nd, there is no way he is being sacked now.

[Kikó]

It's paper shite fed from Woodward. He loves opening his mouth.

[Luca]

It's paper shite fed from Woodward. He loves opening his mouth.

That'll be it. Ogden and Ladyman don't write conventional "paper shite." They'll have heard it from someone, possibly (probably) Ed himself.

The fact that the two closest journos to the club are towing the exact same line is telling.

[Luca]

Jamie Jackson is reporting it too. They were absolutely briefed by the club. That's the three top journos, all of whom have written essentially the same article.

[Kikó]

I don't think Jamie Jackson has been called a top journo before.

Custis who penned the sun piece will be on the same page. I'd suggest he's gone before Christmas dinner is served.

[Luca]

I always thought he was on the Ogden/Ladyman tier. Maybe I'm thinking of James Ducker (who is also reporting the same two game thing, FWIW).

[Kikó]

Maybe. Danny Taylor is the best football correspondent at the guardian.

[Jimmy Floyd]

I don't understand it when chairmen say a manager has x number of games to save his job. If you don't want the guy then sack him, if you do then back him up. What is going to change due to a single good or bad result against Stoke?

[niko_cee]

I never knew there was such a detailed hierarchy of ITKdom.

[Kikó]

You didn't know that some journalists will have connections within a club? Come on...

[Kikó]

http://www.thesun.co.uk/sol/homepage/sport/football/6816254/Jose-Mourinho-holds-talks-with-Manchester-United-as-Louis-van-Gaal-is-on-his-way-out-of-Old-Trafford.html

Seems this one is actually holding up and van Gaal is pretty much nailed on to be given the heave ho very soon. He's lost the dressing room.

It's done.

[Reg]

It's paper shite fed from Woodward. He loves opening his mouth.
Not doubting this at all but what's the advantage of doing that?

[Kikó]

He likes to blabber. There is no advantage other than looking like you're doing something. Same as all those "we're signing Bale,Neymar and Ronny!" Stories out straight after the cl defeats.

He's a dribbling Moran.

[phonics]

This is a terrible sitcom

http://cdn-football365.365.co.za/wp-content/uploads/2015/12/21100025/Daily-Mirror-Football365.jpg

[Jimmy Floyd]

Narcissistic executive Jerry (Jose Mourinho) has his life turned upside down when he is unexpectedly fired. Forced out of his home to move in with mad Uncle Eric (Louis van Gaal), he quickly finds that his house is actually overrun by squatters Teabag (Ashley Young) and Bogbrush (Marouane Fellaini). Things take a turn for the worse when he finds out his better looking brother Bill (Pep Guardiola) has been shagging his daughter (Eva Carneiro) whilst...

Nah, definitely shit.

[Kikó]

http://www.thesun.co.uk/sol/homepage/sport/football/6817024/Mourinho-to-Man-Utd-all-but-agreed-the-final-decision-on-sacking-Louis-van-Gaal-is-now-down-to-the-Glazers.html

Down to the Glazers to pull the trigger now.

[Davgooner]

You happy with that?

[Jeet]

If Pep had a choice, no doubt he would pick Arsenal.

Wenger Out! :D

[niko_cee]

I speculated to a gooner the other day that Wenger would win the league and then step aside to let 'Pep' take charge.

[Jeet]

Something to be announced to the New York stock exchange at 2:30pm

[Kikó]

New hot dog partner.

[Lewis]

The existing hot dog partner should be allowed to bed their recipe in.

[Kikó]

Would like to reply with some kind of play on words with time and thyme but it's beyond me.

[Jimmy Floyd]

The existing hot dog partner should be allowed to bed their recipe in.

Apparently the new one has a recipe more geared towards the lucrative Korean market.

[Lewis]

That doesn't mean the current one should be hounded out.

[Davgooner]

If Pep had a choice, no doubt he would pick Arsenal.

Wenger Out! :D

Looks like Arsenal have picked him as well.

[Kikó]

Ruff justice for weng.

[Kikó]

Something to be announced to the New York stock exchange at 2:30pmKAMAGAMES LAUNCHES MANCHESTER UNITED SOCIAL SLOTS GAME

• Specially designed Social Slots game for Manchester United fans

Manchester United’s Official Social Casino Games Partner, KamaGames has today launched an exciting new Social Slots online game, aimed at the Club’s 659 million global fans.

Manchester United Social Slots, powered by KamaGames, features images of the Club’s first team players and gives fans of United the opportunity to play and interact with other supporters around the world.

As a social casino game, no money can be won; however, players can participate in social media competitions, with the chance to win Manchester United prizes, such as signed memorabilia, match tickets and VIP experiences.

The release of the new social casino game follows on from KamaGames’ successful launch of Manchester United Social Poker and Manchester United Social Roulette powered by KamaGames.

Since the launch of the partnership in January this year, subscribers to the games have won Bulova watches, signed shirts, met first team players, played matches against Untied legends, as well as making VIP trips to watch the team play at Old Trafford.

Manchester United’s Group Managing Director, Richard Arnold comments:

“KamaGames has successfully created an array of social casino games aimed at bringing fun and excitement to our fans. Each game utilises the latest technology and not only allows the Club to interact with fans but also lets our supporters interact with each other, no matter where they are in the world.”

“Both Manchester United Social Poker and Manchester United Social Roulette, powered by KamaGames, have proved to be extremely popular with our fans and I am sure this latest offering will be no different.”

Kevin Egan from KamaGames Comments:

"KamaGames are pleased to announce the launch of our 3rd Social Casino Game with Manchester United Football Club. Manchester United Social Slots, powered by KamaGames, combines the latest in mobile gaming technology with the world’s biggest sports brand.

Adding social slots to our existing Social Poker and Social Roulette Games provide Manchester United fans with a full range of Social Casino titles where they can connect with fans all over the world”.

Manchester United Social Slots, powered by KamaGames, is available to download from today on both the Apple Appstore and Google Play.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Djemba Djemba, Djemba Djemba, Kleberson.

:drool:

I'm downloading it now.

[simon]

:D

[Pepe]

That's even more embarrassing than the hot dogs. :D

[Lewis]

Every one of these releases seems to claim 659 million fans. Why don't they add a couple of million on each time to make it look like such partnerships are worthwhile?

[Kikó]

https://amp.twimg.com/v/ba3bb0be-7b1a-4bc0-b260-6db10b0a8ee9

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

:D

That is fantastic.

[Kikó]

I'd post it as a video if I want forum fick.

[Shindig]

United and Liverpool chewing through managers would be fun until it got boring fast.

[Kikó]

Stormed out of the press conference within 6 minutes http://www.dailymail.co.uk/sport/football/article-3372079/Manchester-United-news-LIVE-Louis-van-Gaal-speaks-amid-Jose-Mourinho-talk.html

[Smiffy]

.....

[Kikó]

I feel for him. It's classless and shameful from the board to drag it on. They're cowards.

[Davgooner]

Bring back Kenyon IMO.

[Smiffy]

.....

[Kikó]

Fuck off Dave

[Davgooner]

Calm it. You can give it large in a few years when we're becoming increasingly unhappy at the football Remi Garde's Arsenal are shitting out.

[Kikó]

I've heard "Pep" could be arsenal bound. His wife likes London apparently.

[John Arne]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lH5jmsHXrgY

Seething.

[John Arne]

I think he's spot, by the way.

[Weaver]

Here's the BBC transcript, for those who can't be arsed to watch the video:


Question 1: "Louis, thank you for your time. Arsene Wenger has said today that the speculation over your future is disrespectful. Is that something you agree with?"

Answer: "Erm, has anybody in this room not a feeling to apologise to me? Nobody has that feeling? That's what I'm wondering?"

Question 2: "What have we done wrong?"

Answer: "I think I was already sacked, I have read... I have been sacked. My colleague [replacement] was here already.

"What do you think that happens with my wife or with my kids or with my grandchildren or with the fans of Manchester United or my friends? What do you think? They have called me a lot of times and also Arsene Wenger is saying something about that.

"Do you think that I want to talk with the media now? I'm here only because of the Premier League rules. I have to talk with you. But I can only see when I say something that you use my words in your context.

"I want to say only that I have tried to lift the confidence of my players, I have done everything this week. I hold meetings, evaluation meetings with the players, with my members of staff, I hold a Christmas lunch, I have held a speech and I feel the warmth and support of everybody in Carrington, this Aon training complex.

"But I didn't feel that in the media and, of course, I can imagine that you can write about that subject. We are not in a good position but four weeks ago we were first in the Premier League and in about four weeks we can again be back in that position.

Question 3: "You have been though Louis at big clubs, huge clubs before. This is Manchester United and when results don't go well and when the supporters have turned it is inevitable that speculation will happen. You surely aren't surprised that there is speculation?"

Answer: "No, I don't think that you can do that because you have to stick by the facts and when I get calls from [former manager Sir] Alex Ferguson and [director] David Gill and [executive vice-chairman] Ed Woodward because you are creating something that is not good, that is not being the facts and now I have to answer the questions.

"I don't think that I want to do it. I only say now I am focused on Stoke City, I help my players, I wish you a merry Christmas and maybe also a happy new year when I see you. Enjoy the wine and a mince pie. Goodbye."

[SvN]

Fuck them, I don't blame him at all for that press conference.

[Lewis]

Face turn. :drool:

[Lee]

He's bang on. Why should he play nice?

[CJay]

He's spot on. Good to get the punch in before you go down, I guess.

[niko_cee]

Look at the state of them when it cuts to that journo talking.

Absolute scum, he should have rock bottomed at least one of them.

Love the way he says mince pie and then there's a little 'oooooh'.

:D

[Yevrah]

He's sealed his fate there.

[Davgooner]

Only because the press will cry about it. I can't see much wrong with his attitude towards them, and perhaps they'd like to think about how they'll feel if roles were reversed.

[Yevrah]

I'm not saying its wrong, but it's pretty self-defeating. Unless he wants the sack that is.

[Disco]

What's to lose? If the people you work for are going to sack you over a few headlines you're better off gone.

[Kikó]

ESPN said that united didn't want to sack him as it would create bad feeling between them,its his last job and it's near Christmas.

What a load of complete spanners we have ruling the roost.

[Giggles]

ESPN said that united didn't want to sack him as it would create bad feeling between them,its his last job and it's near Christmas.

What a load of complete spanners we have ruling the roost.

Man Utd really could take the hit on the season though.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

ESPN said that united didn't want to sack him as it would create bad feeling between them,its his last job and it's near Christmas.

What a load of complete spanners we have ruling the roost.

:D

If that's true what a shambles the board is, well they are even if it's false but still.

[Kikó]

http://www.espnfc.com/manchester-united/story/2767979/man-united-stand-by-van-gaal-ultimatum-sources

There is the article.

[Boom-Boom]

Did Ferguson ever come under serious pressure as Man United manager? (During the Premier league era)

[Jimmy Floyd]

Not many people know he was actually sacked just before the 1998/99 season and replaced by Tony Blair.

[Kikó]

Fergie was nearly sacked in 89.

[Mellberg]

KUTGW, 'Ed'. It would be much worse if the rest of us weren't shit too (Liverpool, Chelsea).

'Us'? :harold:

17 league titles won between United, Chelsea and Liverpool in the Premier League era. Have a word.

[Magic]

Did Ferguson ever come under serious pressure as Man United manager? (During the Premier league era)

How can you know so little about football? Between that and the recent Guardiola question I'm beginning to think you're a female alias trying to get answers to impress a boyfriend or something.

[Magic]

Are you my wife, Boom?

[Pepe]

Who is she trying to impress? :eyemouth:

[Disco]

They're really scraping the barrel now.

http://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/0/football/35173098

[Jimmy Floyd]

In other news, ex goalkeeper Kevin Pilkington was scathing about the under-fire Dutchman.

'His defensive tactics go against everything this club and the people of Manchester stand for,' said Pilkington, 41.

Van Gaal found backing, though, when his countryman and former United great Raimond van der Gouw, 52, was quoted in Dutch media as saying 'Manchester United are special. As a club, they stand against the immediacy of modern life.'

Eric Djemba-Djemba was unavailable for comment.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Well hopefully that's that.

[Kikó]

The wilted tulip rip. The club the Glazers deserve is here.

[Reg]

I think if they lose to Chelsea by two or more he'll be off.

[Giggles]

I think if they lose to Chelsea by two or more he'll be off.

He surely won't see Chelsea now.

[Kikó]

You think he's lasting until Monday?

[Reg]

Probably.

Although I think that's the first time in twenty years that they've lost 4 in a row, so, hmm...

Edit: the clever chap knows how to not get sacked:


"I can also quit by myself, but that is something I discuss with [executive vice-chairman] Ed Woodward not you," Van Gaal told the media after the game.
"It is not always the club that has to fire or sack me."
He told a news conference: "Sometimes I do that by myself, but I am the one who wants to speak first with the board of Manchester United and my members of staff and my players, not with you."

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Sack him, bring Mourinho in for the Chelsea game and watch us lol past them.

[Reg]

Sack him, bring Mourinho in for the Chelsea game and watch us lol past them.
Why would you hope for a manager who will continue boring football, just in a different way, when there's a realistic hope of landing somebody like Pep?

It's not like you support Doncaster.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Why would you hope for a manager who will continue boring football, just in a different way, when there's a realistic hope of landing somebody like Pep?

It's not like you support Doncaster.
If Pep were to come he wouldn't do so until the end of the season, I can't put up with Van Gaal for another 5 months or so.

I guess we could give it to Giggs for a laugh.

[ScousePig]

My dad's concluded that it's Giggs' fault.

I can't see Van Gaal seeing the New Year in.

[Boydy]

They should hire Mourinho then sack him in the summer and get Guardiola then. Imagine the Mourinho seethe. It'd be brilliant.

[SincereTheRebel]

There are two many bad man managers potentially available. Might as well cut his throat now and get someone else in.

[Kikó]

Not that Mourinho will fix all wrongs but his teams have been the top scorers a number of times. It's not the best but it's better.

[Henry]

He's a twat. I'm glad for him.

[Giggles]

Any truth here?

http://www.sportsjoe.ie/football/speculation-goes-into-overdrive-as-giggs-takes-training-with-no-van-gaal/56815

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

It's happening :drool:

[Kikó]

Giggs in charge for this then Mourinho in for Swansea? They're all cunts.

[Smiffy]

.....

[John Arne]

Apparently he hasn't bothered turning up for training today. Shame, I had hoped he would at least last until the end of the season.

[Kikó]

It's not a team defunct of talent, it's just poorly managed and unbalanced. The first thing that needs sorting is the footballing direction of the club as there is little rhyme or reason why we sign players.

It's a challenge for whoever comes in.

[Lewis]

To save time, Smiffy, who could win one of the 'next few' titles with the richest team in the world?

[Jimmy Floyd]

Mourinho would probably back Rooney in a centre forward role, since he likes the centre forward to charge around doing everything, which old Wayne is quite adept at.

Short of that, Daley Blind would be back in midfield, and Phil Jones can expect an extended spell at right back. 'Memphis' might as well pack his bags now.

[Smiffy]

.....

[Kikó]

Lvg hasn't won anything relevant in twenty years compared to Mourinho. He's definitely not as risky.

The last bit is a bit obvious considering we are on the verge of sacking the manager. Of course we look the least likely.

[Smiffy]

.....

[Jeet]

Would Mata be sold as soon as Jose come in? :D

Replace one negative manager with another, yeah that works.

[Chrissy]

Mourinho would get on with Mata. Mata knows the score if he doesn't. I think Man United best get rid of LVG asap as that ship is sinking fasting.

Quite how that squad of players is playing so shit is beyond me. They are turning into a slightly better version of Newcastle.

I agree with Jimmy's sentiments about Rooney. Mourinho likes players who work hard etc. Hence why Oscar kept his place and Mata was originally hunted. Depay would be fucked out the door real quick unless he changed.

He'd be ruthless enough to get rid of the deadwood as well. Quite alot of it is kicking about. Quite how Ashley Young is considered as left wing back is beyond me.

They need a leader at the back. So a centre half who takes no shit is surely the first signing. They look powerpuff weak. Likewise a midfielder who can win the ball and cover space. Carrick etc look really ineffective.

Say what you like but I think they let go of Darren Fletcher way too early. Horrible cunt to watch but did his job well.

[Giggles]

Was Darren Fletcher not permanently crocked?

[Kikó]

Fletcher is past his best. West Brom is his level now, he made the right move.

The squad needs players not more culling. There is no depth.

[Chrissy]

Was Darren Fletcher not permanently crocked?

He's played 90 minutes every game this season. Looking bloody effective in the process.

[Chrissy]

Fletcher is past his best. West Brom is his level now, he made the right move.

The squad needs players not more culling. There is no depth.

According to this you have about 24 first team players in your squad. That's more than enough to cope with injuries etc. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Manchester_United_F.C.

I'd state you need a cull and players brought in.

[Giggles]

Didn't even realise Fletcher was still playing.

[ScousePig]

I think what Man United need to do is sign some better players and play better.

[Giggles]

They need to score more goals and win more matches. They'll do better then.

[ScousePig]

Spot on.

[Giggles]

Spot on.

Give me the job.

[Kikó]

Give giggles the job. We haven't had a dour Celt in a while.

[Giggles]

Give giggles the job. We haven't had a dour Celt in a while.

I'll fetch my chewing gum.

[Angelsaint]

Where come this "United attacking football"? I remember Fergie grinding results or people are still thinking this is the 90'? Even Barcelona with their MSN plays direct football now.

[Kikó]

Nobody has suggested Fergusons teams attacked all the time.

[Yevrah]

You can get away with much if you're winning while doing it, which Fergie was when he was playing Rooney at right back.

Presumably the same logic now applies with Mourinho and his tin hat, in that after the dour shambles under Moyes and LVG and his philosophy, winning something's probably quite appealing.

[Kikó]

Fuck the winning something, just put a team out that can entertain and are playing with some kind of plan that isn't pass it backwards or sideways.

[phonics]

It's not a team defunct of talent, it's just poorly managed and unbalanced. The first thing that needs sorting is the footballing direction of the club as there is little rhyme or reason why we sign players.

It's a challenge for whoever comes in.

So you think Mourinho, the guy who went through Schurlle, De Bruyne, Willian and Cuadrado in a year for just that one position is the answer?

[Angelsaint]

Fuck the winning something, just put a team out that can entertain and are playing with some kind of plan that isn't pass it backwards or sideways.definition of Barcelona that everyone loves. Missing the clubs rolling over just because you are Barcelona.

[Kikó]

If you think we play the same as Barcelona is so tragic you may as well end it all.

[Magic]

Sloba! Sloba! Sloba!

[mugbull]

Guardiola will be an utter disappointment (relative to his standards) wherever he goes. Mourinho will be pretty good for a year or two as always. I think some clubs are just unmanageable.

[Dquincy]

Does anyone (apart from me) want this thread title changed?

[Kikó]

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/CXQ-1xYWkAIGZFc.jpg

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

:face:

[Boydy]

Good.

[Angelsaint]

If you think we play the same as Barcelona is so tragic you may as well end it all.

I said Barcelona played exactly like that under Guardiola and everyone was wanking themselves over that. Now with MSN they play more direct.

[Jimmy Floyd]

They obviously think Guardiola could happen. Mourinho will be absolutely seething.

[Kikó]

Indeed. There are numerous factions who still don't want Mourinho. Blind leading the blind.

[elth]

I wonder how many times in his career Mourinho can ruin Juan Mata.

[Manc]

Juan.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Juan.

Moore.

[Spoonsky]

Indeed. There are numerous factions who still don't want Mourinho. Blind leading the blind.

I'm not sure Daley has as much influence as you think.

[Shindig]

Is Mourinho going to fix things? Maybe United's problems run deeper. Arsenal might go through the same motions when Arsene retires.

[Kikó]

http://www.independent.co.uk/sport/football/premier-league/louis-van-gaal-latest-manchester-united-boss-believes-club-are-beyond-help-but-board-urges-him-to-a6787886.html

Grim summary.

[Manc]

Quick, someone create a LVG resigns thread.

[Giggles]

He'd be handing over some amount of cash if he resigned, no chance. Looks like they're going to write off the rest of the seasons and go after Guardiola then.

[Kikó]

We're trying to appoint marvel superheroes? I suppose it works from a brand point of view.

[Smiffy]

.....

[Giggles]

We're trying to appoint marvel superheroes? I suppose it works from a brand point of view.

Fucking SwiftKey.

[Kikó]

Smiffy- there is no plan. Just chaos.

[Charlie]

Moore.

Thome

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

http://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/football/35508280

Mourinho talks have begun.

The Letter™ seems to have done the trick.

[Reg]

A big sad laugh at them getting Mourinho. Gone is all pretence of developing youth and playing attacking football.

Kiko ahead of the papers and BBC.

[Lewis]

It's desperate stuff indeed. Hiring the best manager in the game. lol doesn't even cover it.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Can you imagine the sheer intensity of the masturbation being partaken in by the person in charge of designing Sky's intro clip for next season's Manchester derby?

[Reg]

It's desperate stuff indeed. Hiring the best manager in the game. lol doesn't even cover it.
Bollocks to that. Football isn't just about winning.

[Lewis]

Yes it is.

[Byron]

Can you imagine the sheer intensity of the masturbation being partaken in by the person in charge of designing Sky's intro clip for next season's Manchester derby?

It'll just be RIVALRY repeated over and over.

[Davgooner]

The pre-cum was flowing out of the SSN studios within about 10 minutes of Pep being announced.

[Ian]

Bollocks to that. Football isn't just about winning.

As Lewis said, it is. Nobody wants to be that team who plays ace football but does fuck all.

[Reg]

United have a bit more of a choice than 1) "doing fuck all" and 2) hiring Mourinho.

[randomlegend]

Who should they hire?

[Lewis]

I would go for Flavour of the Month. He's got Hipsters' Favourite playing some Good Football at the minute, and his jumper game is spectacular.

[QE Harold Flair]

As Lewis said, it is. Nobody wants to be that team who plays ace football but does fuck all.

1970's Holland won fuck all and are remembered as one of the greatest teams of all time, with a style also named after them.

Guardiola > Mourinho, anyway.

[Lee]

Some of the best fun I've had watching football is when the football has been shit and the club has been doing fuck all. If it was all about winning you wouldn't have 200 people standing in the pissing rain watching Hinckley play in division ten.

[Reg]

I don't know, anyone who isn't the antithesis of what United are meant to be about.

Edit- well said, you two ^.

[Lewis]

United haven't played consistent attacking football since 2008, when they still clammed up in big matches, and had barely done so between 2002 and 2007 (you may be too young to remember the long ball shit they won the league with in 2003) when they were crap as well, so that stuff doesn't hold up anymore. That is if it ever did.

Balls to the seventies Dutch team[s] as well. The West Germans were worthy winners and packed full of legends, and I would rather win a World Cup than give my name to a style of play.

[Spoonsky]

Well, they should have gotten Guardiola. They didn't. It's hard to look past Mourinho as a second choice, and Reg's criticism would be more effective if he actually had a better candidate in mind.

The thing about the Dutch in the seventies is that they're an anomaly. What other teams have been remembered for playing great football without winning anything?

[Reg]

Ferguson's United attacked the vast majority of Premier League teams, even in his latter days. There would be about 4-5 league games a season where he would set the team up reactively rather than proactively. The Champions League latter stages were not attacking.

I was watching well before 2003 and certainly don't remember that team playing long ball football.

It's a little ironic that United fans who have been continually referencing van Gaal's boring style are advocating hiring Mourinho.

[Lewis]

The problem with what 'LvG' is serving up is that it produces two shots a game. I don't think anybody objects to the possession aspect of it.

[Reg]

The thing about the Dutch in the seventies is that they're an anomaly. What other teams have been remembered for playing great football without winning anything?
Hungary, Brazil 82, Brazil 98, England 96.


The problem with what 'LvG' is serving up is that it produces two shots a game. I don't think anybody objects to the possession aspect of it.
It's everything about it. It's not taking risks. Mourinho's doctrine is to take as few risks as possible.

[Spoonsky]

Let's be honest, people only remember England 96 because the trauma was seared into the national psyche. I concede the first two though.

I'd still like to know who you'd have appointed instead.

[Lewis]

The 1982 Brazil team was literally just a midfield, and nobody outside of England remembers our 1996 side (which played well twice). Hungary and Holland are the two 'great' teams that won shit all, and they won shit all.

Mourinho wins things.

[Reg]

I deliberately didn't name anyone specific because if I was in charge Mourinho would be so far down my list as to be irrelevant.

Here's some in no order:

Giggs
Pocchetino
De Boer
Sampaoli
Lowe
Spalletti
Koeman
Emery
Dortmund dude
Kevin Keegan

And probably a zillion others that a person whose job it is to employ a manager should be aware of.

[Toby]

Kevin Keegan is a nice touch. :D

[Max Power]

Can't wait until they sign John Terry on a free.

BANTER

[Yevrah]

Can you imagine the sheer intensity of the masturbation being partaken in by the person in charge of designing Sky's intro clip for next season's Manchester derby?

It's box office, there's no doubt about that.

Which is probably what the BRAND needs given the players are mostly bang average.

[Giggles]

Reg is having an absolute 'mare here.

[Byron]

Really? If the sole point of supporting a team was winning, why don't we all support Barca(mate)?

[Kikó]

Indeed.

I want to be at least a little entertained when watching the club. There has been large parts of van Gaal's reign which has been fearful defensive crap. It all happened after Leicester won 5-3, it made him shit the bed.

Getting Mourinho isn't a bad thing. I like him generally and don't think his style of football is awful. Pragmatic maybe too much. The issue for me is how a multimillion pound business continues to stumble around in the dark like a drunk in a nightclub at closing time trying to grab any old girl. Compare and contrast with city who have built a plan and executed it culminating in getting the best manager on the market despite already having a very good one.

[Jimmy Floyd]

With Mourinho it's the small games that piss you off when you've paid whatever to get into the ground, the team go 1-0 uo against Sunderland or whoever and he just closes the game down.

In the big games he has no equal.

[Giggles]

Really? If the sole point of supporting a team was winning, why don't we all support Barca(mate)?

With his alternatives. A club like Man Utd gets the best they can.

[Shindig]

Indeed.

I want to be at least a little entertained when watching the club. There has been large parts of van Gaal's reign which has been fearful defensive crap. It all happened after Leicester won 5-3, it made him shit the bed.

Getting Mourinho isn't a bad thing. I like him generally and don't think his style of football is awful. Pragmatic maybe too much. The issue for me is how a multimillion pound business continues to stumble around in the dark like a drunk in a nightclub at closing time trying to grab any old girl. Compare and contrast with city who have built a plan and executed it culminating in getting the best manager on the market despite already having a very good one.

City doesn't have the weight of history and expectation on their shoulders. Plus their deeper, dumber pockets so Pep can grab who he likes on the market and still strut around like he's good or something.

[Lee]

Funny, I have that 5-3 as the game that changed Pearson's mentality last season. We started the season really well but were conceding plenty. Pearson shit himself and got us defending our way to the bottom of the league.

[John Arne]

ITKJA reporting van Gaal sacked today.

[Shindig]

"Mahow was right" T-shirts at the ready. They've been in storage for two months.

[Smiffy]

.....

[Kikó]

Sure.

[Smiffy]

.....

[Ian]

I don't want Mourinho but I don't know who I DO want. And I don't want fucking Giggs.

[Smiffy]

.....

[Giggles]

Moyes seemed as good an idea then as Pochettino does now. Maybe he'd work but football is gone such a way now that a club like Utd need a certain stature of appointment and they can't go for second smaller type one in 3 appointments.
Maybe if Pochettino wins the league, but there's as much chance of Guardiola changing his mind and rocking up at Old Trafford.

[Yevrah]

Pochettino would be a much better choice than Moyes was, because he's shown he can play expansive football, which was one of the main issues with Moyes. It's not just about the name.

[Smiffy]

.....

[Jimmy Floyd]

What Pochettino seems to do is impose extreme levels of fitness and energy. 'Expansive football' is fairly irrelevant.

[Giggles]

Pochettino has yet to have a team that hasn't completely run out of puff by March. Remains to be seen if he has learned yet.

[Henry]

I hope they get Mourinho. Whether it goes well or not, it will be good fun.

[Smiffy]

.....

[Andy]

I think Pochettino would be a good shout, we played great football when he was here and with a bigger squad he will always get better results. This season with Spurs he's rotating his full backs and attacking midfielders and they seem to be doing better for it.

Also he fits the bill as a long term option who'd be quite happy to work under someone who buys the players. Always likes to bring young players through.

His 'philosophy' suits the United way.

[simon]

Pochettino has yet to have a team that hasn't completely run out of puff by March. Remains to be seen if he has learned yet.

Paging Benny.

[Giggles]

Paging Benny.

I heard when they lost to Newcastle than Benny supports Leicester now.

[Lewis]

I'm holding off on Smallpockets until he does it in a season where more than two teams (one of which is fucking Leicester) have it together. I was equally conservative when everybody was hailing Roberto Martinez as the best Everton manager ever, and I think I was right.

[elth]

Mourinho won't fix all of the problems at the club, and he's not going to work long term, but he'll be better than van Gaal, and worth it for the meltdown when Guardiola's City win by 3 goals at Old Trafford alone. He might actually get Pep's eye out as a consolation prize this time.

[Yevrah]

What problems do you actually have?

I know it gets banded around a lot but I struggle to see (m)any.

[Andy]

Terrible squad balance has to be the main issue.

[Yevrah]

Which buying players can fix.

[Lewis]

There seems to be an article every week about how the youth academy has been allowed to go to shit and how City's is the best thing to ever happen ever in sport, but I can't help thinking that it's basically irrelevant these days. Their schoolboy side is bashing everybody, but so what? For better or worse, big clubs only need youth products to fill quota places now (don't say Barcelona. Who have they produced since Sergio Busquets?), so as long as you can find four able bodied utility players you're golden.

[Kikó]

What a bizarre attitude. The club should invest in developing youth teams and keep bringing through young lads into the first team. The problem is players severely underperforming and no real strategy on who we are buying other than "he's a big name".

[Yevrah]

Martial and Depay weren't bought to that criteria.

[Kikó]

No that's true but we have spent a number of summers like desperate drunks trying to bring a bird home and ending up waking up in a kebab.

[John]

The only 'name' player Man Utd have signed recently is Schweinsteiger. I'm not sure what gameplan the others have been signed in accordance with, but it certainly isn't 'he's a big name'.

EDIT - Completely forgot about Di Maria. Even still, two players don't really constitute a pattern.

[Shindig]

Romero and Valdes are big names.

[Reg]

Falcao and di Maria, then Schweinsteiger, were the names. They have failed with all the other attempts.

It seems a bit of a mishmash of a recruitment policy. Big names, quick fixes, OK but never going to be great players, long term investments... There's a bit of everything.

Seems they're going with Mourinho anyway. He knows how to build a squad if given the money, which he always has been bar this one season.

[Lewis]

What a bizarre attitude. The club should invest in developing youth teams and keep bringing through young lads into the first team. The problem is players severely underperforming and no real strategy on who we are buying other than "he's a big name".

It should invest, but the fact they haven't built a two-hundred million quid academy like City is being used to suggest that they are in terminal decline. I know journalists constantly need a NARRATIVE, but big clubs getting great service out of academy players (United included) is the exception rather than the rule, so I'm not buying into it being a sign of the apocalypse.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Four of your 25 man squad is a pretty big deal. Almost 20% of the players you're allowed to use.

[Kikó]

It's not the players we've just signed, it's the willy waving at Fabregas, Ronaldo, Neymar, Ramos etc that's embarrassing and a sign of people at the top just trying to buy players who everyone knows.

[Kikó]

It should invest, but the fact they haven't built a two-hundred million quid academy like City is being used to suggest that they are in terminal decline. I know journalists constantly need a NARRATIVE, but big clubs getting great service out of academy players (United included) is the exception rather than the rule, so I'm not buying into it being a sign of the apocalypse.

I see no reason why we have to be the same as city but we've took a year to replace Mclair. Coaches and youth scouts not being replaced. Things like new balls are requiring sign off from senior members of the club etc etc. The Glazers have no intention to match city, they don't give a fuck.

City meanwhile build top facilities, hoover up all the kids in the area and are winning the youth battle. They're taking serious an important part of being a football club.