Mahow's all new, all new, all new food thread

[niko_cee]

Frozen breaded/battered chicken goodness is one of the upsides of small child parties.

[Lewis]

The ones made with actual chicken breast are mega, but the mashed up bollocks ones are best left in the past.

[Giggles]

The ones made with actual chicken breast are mega, but the mashed up bollocks ones are best left in the past.

The local butcher does ones like that with proper batter on them that are brilliant (also has salted chilli ones that are as good) but I was passing after 6.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Chicken dippers are amazing, I could probably eat my own weight in them.

[Magic]

Chicken dippers are amazing, I could probably eat my own weight in them.

Chickens would become a critically endangered species after that.

[Giggles]

Chickens would become a critically endangered species after that.

Unlikely, there's about 1 whole chicken in that much.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Chickens would become a critically endangered species after that.
I'm alright with that.

[Magic]

Unlikely, there's about 1 whole chicken in that much.

Lol that's a very good point.

[Adamski]

I made bibimbap with chicken bulgogi tonight. Very nice it was too.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Saw this at Tesco the last time I went, it's fucking stunning:

http://img.tesco.com/Groceries/pi/048/5039303003048/IDShot_540x540.jpg

[John]

One chilli? Wimp.

[Disco]

Encourage them to open more restaurants, it's good for business.

[Ian]

I'm going to be spending a few days in the Isle of Man week after next and some of the seafood places look awesome. Gonna be getting in about the 'Queenie' scallops. :nodd:

[John]

A place in town has pioneered the 'Scotch pie and beans' pizza.

http://i67.tinypic.com/dfhjtf.jpg

Yep, just a pie, pastry and all, on a pizza. No wonder people laugh at us.

[bruhnaldo]

And people talk shit to me because I actually like Hawaiian pizza.

[Spammer]

Morrison's had an offer on Quorn sausages where you can get 6 for a quid up until recently. I bought fuckloads and I'll be having a lot of guilt-free* sausage sandwiches for a long time yet :drool:

*Because of them good for you, not because animals weren't killed.

[Disco]

That pizza looks truly awful, Hawaiian is also clearly the best.

[Ian]

That pie pizza. :sick:

Makes my munchy box picture I posted on the old board look a lot better, at least. Well, it would if it wasn't gone.

[John]

That's not my picture, by the way. That's the picture the place posted on Facebook to advertise their creation, so presumably that's the best possible example of the pizza and as good as it can ever be expected to look.

In less distressing food news, my mate's parents have opened a cafe called 'Lettuce Eat', perhaps the most benign pun ever professionally printed.

[Pepe]

Hawaiian pizza is atrocious. Keep pineapple away from pizza ( or any main course for that n matter) ffs.

[Magic]

A place in town has pioneered the 'Scotch pie and beans' pizza.

http://i67.tinypic.com/dfhjtf.jpg

Yep, just a pie, pastry and all, on a pizza. No wonder people laugh at us.

That is the scummiest thing I've seen today. Just in front of Rangers fans attacking Celtic fans in Glasgow city centre earlier today.

[Pepe]

They could at least spread the beans more evenly.

[niko_cee]

A lettuce inspired cafe in jockland?

Good luck with that.

And are quorn sausages actually good for you, or are they just not as bad as real ones? Dreadful things.

[Mazuuurk]

I'm in camp Pineapple. Love it on Pizza, love it in like thai type curries, don't mind it on burgers one bit.

[Giggles]

A place in town has pioneered the 'Scotch pie and beans' pizza.

http://i67.tinypic.com/dfhjtf.jpg

Yep, just a pie, pastry and all, on a pizza. No wonder people laugh at us.

Where's that? If it's anywhere near my hotel I'm all over that like Jimmy Saville on a minor.

[SvN]

Saw this at Tesco the last time I went, it's fucking stunning:

http://img.tesco.com/Groceries/pi/048/5039303003048/IDShot_540x540.jpg

I wish they'd sell the guacamole they do, it's outstanding. By far the best I've ever had.

[Boydy]

Pineapple has no business on any dinner plate.

[Foe]

Pineapple has no business on any dinner plate.

Pineapple is a snack for beaches and no other occassion.

[mikem]

https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/3/37/Coffee_and_Beignets_at_Café_du_Monde.jpg

So good to be back home. Luckiky I have a 50 km race in three weeks and can just pretend I'm pre-carb loading. That's a thing, right.

[Magic]

Is that genuine icing sugar? The fuck.

[Adamski]

That's not my picture, by the way. That's the picture the place posted on Facebook to advertise their creation, so presumably that's the best possible example of the pizza and as good as it can ever be expected to look.

In less distressing food news, my mate's parents have opened a cafe called 'Lettuce Eat', perhaps the most benign pun ever professionally printed.

Where is it? There's one of them in argyle st but it's been closed for ages.

[mikem]

Is that genuine icing sugar? The fuck.

Powdered sugar - it pretty much all falls off.

[Magic]

:sick:

[niko_cee]

Those beignets in New Orleans were pretty good, as I recall.

[Pepe]

Saw this at Tesco the last time I went, it's fucking stunning:

http://img.tesco.com/Groceries/pi/048/5039303003048/IDShot_540x540.jpg

If 'tomatillo salsa' is 'tangy,' you have fucked it up.

[Magic]

I'm inclined to agree. Hate tangy shit. That pickle chutney you get from Indians Is awful.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Tangy is godly.

[Giggles]

Got a savage thing with the poppadums in an Indian in Oxford last night. Might be a common thing in the UK ones. Load of chillies and peas and stuff chopped up in an oily sauce, hot as fuck.

[niko_cee]

Wahaca is shit.

[Disco]

I'm inclined to agree. Hate tangy shit. That pickle chutney you get from Indians Is awful.

Lime pickle? Best thing on the menu.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Lime pickle is indeed amazing but I've been converted to chilli pickle.

[John]

Where's that? If it's anywhere near my hotel I'm all over that like Jimmy Saville on a minor.

Driftwood, right at Charing Cross.


Where is it? There's one of them in argyle st but it's been closed for ages.

Yeah, it's Argyle street. Maybe they've just bought over another place and the pun came with the signage.

[Mazuuurk]

Wait, who is mikem and does he live in New Orleans? That's awesome :) I go every year there.

[mikem]

Live in Phoenix but eighth generation New Orleanian. Back home for two weeks for my uncle's funeral, the worst attempt at sitting shiva in recorded Hebrew history and my in law's annual family reunion. Will leave 10 pounds heavier.

[John]

You'll come out the other side of that sugary thing ten pounds heavier.

[mikem]

The sugar is a deceptive marketing gimmick - it stays on the plate. Or you spend the next three weeks washing it off my three year old. You lift it out of the mound and shake it off. Otherwise imagine a solid mouthful of powdered sugar, you will choke to death before you gain the weight.

[Magic]

Sounds like a fat person's excuse.

[niko_cee]

"8th generation"

:D

Is your kid the 9th or have you broken the line what with not living there anymore?

[mikem]

Yeah, pretty much. Even liberals have Southern nostalgia and it gets sappier when I am home. I am surprised that my sister's kid is joining the Army - I thought my generation would be the last. That's a very New England brahmin, Southern aristocrat phrase. I don't think I've heard the few "native" non-Hispanics use it in Az. It would be interesting if people in Utah use it Spoonsky.

It does make me sad because the best part of the South is the resistance of mass market homogenization. For example, I never ate at a McDonald's until I was 19 or so. Not because we don't have fast food, but because we have po boys. We still have and frequent places like Galitoire's or Commander's Palace that have been up and running since the 1870-80's.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Po boys look fucking amazing.

[Luca]

Now I want a fucking po'boy; thanks, lads.

[Lewis]

They look like shit, and the Americans get far too excited about sandwiches for a people that have barely scratched the surface of savoury pastries.

[Boydy]

Yeah, they don't look that good.

[niko_cee]

I vaguely recall having an Oyster po-boy. It was alright.

What's New Orleans like now? Post-Katrina I thought it was pretty bad (having been there a year or so before that happened). Always thought it was a really classically American place, even though they like to think it isn't. Decent aquarium.

[John]

I had something calling itself a Po Boy the last time I was in America, but given it was in the wrong state and in no way good enough to justify how often I hear them spoken about I reckon it must have been an imitation. It was just criminally overfried nonsense with too much bread.

I had a 'cheesesteak' on the same trip and it was crap too.

[niko_cee]

Cheesesteaks are always dreadful.

Especially at Pat's. Or Geno's.

'Cheese food' :sick:

[Lewis]

So why don't they have sausage rolls and steak pies and that like the rest of the colonies? They have exhausted convenience food to the point where they're deep-frying butter, so you would expect fatty meat in a fatty case to go down a treat.

[Magic]

American food is awful. That prick that did those food challenges on Bravo or whatever it was epitomised American general culinary shitness.

[Giggles]

Toby's seems like a place that you'd find a welling-up magic on a Sunday desperately trying to fill four plates for his inlaws while they sit and bitch about him.

[mikem]

New Orleans is one of those "grand old" decaying places that is always looking backwards as much as forwards. Which means it has always been 60% nostalgia, 40% banana republic, and a half inch from total collapse. It will always be for people who like Ho Chi Minh not Singapore. The aquarium? You go to New Orleans to listen to the Rebirth Brass Band play a spiritual followed by a Kanye cover at a house party or dive bar.

The charm is that it is one of the few places in the US where I know what neighborhood a white (and most black) people are from by their accent. Or that proper manners means you stop for fifteen minutes and chat when getting your morning coffee and nobody in line will be the least bit impatient. And everyone stops and joins in the second line when a band plays through. Most native whites when they move to places like Chicago all comment about their new home "Can you believe how white this place is?" That is more a reflection of how it lives and not to how it visits. I'm sure passing through it looks the same.

Post Katrina it is different in both good and bad ways. Big chunks of the Lower Ninth is still abandoned and rotting but when I grew up in the 80's those neighborhoods didn't all have paved roads. We still have the world's most corrupt and shit police force and utterly rampant crime. There was a big push for a Disneyfication and the school system was dangerously close to utter collapse. But people (especially the large number of northern white transplants) have decided that they liked the old shambolic charming mess we have always been instead and things are looking up quite a bit.

[mikem]

So why don't they have sausage rolls and steak pies and that like the rest of the colonies? They have exhausted convenience food to the point where they're deep-frying butter, so you would expect fatty meat in a fatty case to go down a treat.

We were French. Why would we want pies?

[Lewis]

To better yourselves.

[mikem]

With pies? But it was half serious. I don't know for sure but my guess is that the interior was as likely to be opened up by people of German, Scandanavian, or whatever than of English descent.

Luca - I had a conchon de lait po boy at Parkway today. Not one we had growing up. You Canadians would love them.

[Jimmy Floyd]

They have baguettes, patisserie, wine and all sorts of shit like that in Pondicherry. Louisiana got off very lightly and should be grateful.

[mikem]

It is funny, We have both Vietnamese and Cajun versions of all that here. The small part of my mom's family that is Cajun from St Charles still does boucheries during "hog killing season." Boudin and chaudian are great.

But we also have turducken. So we commit all sorts of crimes against nature as well.

[Spoonsky]

Yeah, pretty much. Even liberals have Southern nostalgia and it gets sappier when I am home. I am surprised that my sister's kid is joining the Army - I thought my generation would be the last. That's a very New England brahmin, Southern aristocrat phrase. I don't think I've heard the few "native" non-Hispanics use it in Az. It would be interesting if people in Utah use it Spoonsky.

It does make me sad because the best part of the South is the resistance of mass market homogenization. For example, I never ate at a McDonald's until I was 19 or so. Not because we don't have fast food, but because we have po boys. We still have and frequent places like Galitoire's or Commander's Palace that have been up and running since the 1870-80's.

To be honest I don't know a lot of people with Utah roots (grew up surrounded by atheists, who don't tend to stay in Utah for more than a generation or two, and by academics who get flung to the most random places in the country), so I couldn't say. Maybe Mormons do.

There definitely isn't the sense of nostalgia in Utah, probably because historically there's never been a better time to be Mormon and our economy is great.

[Luca]

With pies? But it was half serious. I don't know for sure but my guess is that the interior was as likely to be opened up by people of German, Scandanavian, or whatever than of English descent.

Luca - I had a conchon de lait po boy at Parkway today. Not one we had growing up. You Canadians would love them.

So a porchetta sandwich, essentially? Food of the gods.

[mikem]

It is apparently and looking it up there are about 1,000,000 places in the States passing lunch meat off as porchetta.

[Luca]

Do they laced it with bits of the crispy skin? :drool:

I've had a full dinner but am just now salivating like an idiot looking at photos of pork sandwiches. Fucking hell.

[Giggles]

Just had the most epic burger I've ever eaten. Italian sausage meat, onions, and beetroot :drool:

Definitely be trying that one again at home.

[Boydy]

I had a Chinese earlier.

Which reminded me of the time when Samadini said he used to get several things from the Chinese and just mix them all together on his plate. :D

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

It was even better on Teamspeak.

He was genuinely stunned that we didn't all do it.

Poor Ian made him feel like the freak that he is.

[Adamski]

I had a Chinese earlier.

Which reminded me of the time when Samadini said he used to get several things from the Chinese and just mix them all together on his plate. :D

What did you get?

And do you mean he used to literally mix them together or just have two different meals on the same plate? I do the latter but always ensure there's a rice divider right down the middle :drool:

[Raoul Duke]

I've developed a powerful lust for wholegrain mustard recently. Outstanding stuff.

[Ian]

Lobster and scallops for dinner last night. Pricey but delicious. They gave me two bits of cutlery that I've no idea what they were for.


What did you get?

And do you mean he used to literally mix them together or just have two different meals on the same plate? I do the latter but always ensure there's a rice divider right down the middle :drool:

Gets a bit of everything that's been ordered and mixes it all in, the mad bastard.

http://www.thethirdhalf.co.uk/showthread.php?401-Chinese-food-How-do-you-eat-it

[Giggles]

I've developed a powerful lust for wholegrain mustard recently. Outstanding stuff.

Slab of cold ham and a jar of that :drool:

[phonics]

If we're talking about jumping on condiment trains, I've ignored horse-radish for years and now I can't get enough of the stuff.

[SvN]

I had a similar experience with tartar sauce. I always just assumed it was a weird, fishy mayonnaise, but it's actually delicious if its proper stuff.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Home made tartar sauce (or just half decent tartar sauce) is divine. I couldn't have fish & chips without it.

[SvN]

I had some Heinz stuff the other day in a Wetherspoons and it was fucking revolting. It didn't even taste like the same condiment.

[phonics]

I'm with Jimmy on Tartar, it's too easy not to make yourself.

[Mazuuurk]

What is actually in Tartar sauce? You just make normal mayonnaise and then add some pickles, or is it cucumber?

[niko_cee]

Capers, lemon, cornichons, boiled egg, dijon mustard, doing it 'properly' isn't that easy, even if you don't make the mayo.

[phonics]

Boiled egg, what? Take that out, pinch of paprika and you're grand.

[niko_cee]

The egg is optional but paprika can gtfo.

[Weaver]

I've developed a powerful lust for wholegrain mustard recently. Outstanding stuff.

It's great, isn't it? I've had it with pork and I've had it in mash recently, and I'm fully converted now.

[Mazuuurk]

Capers, lemon, cornichons, boiled egg, dijon mustard, doing it 'properly' isn't that easy, even if you don't make the mayo.

Yeah OK sounds about right. Had it with Fish & Chips a million times but never actually made it. Well fancy some now. Capers are the best, go with like everything.

I'd probably skip the egg, yeah.

I did start making my own Mayo a while back though, and now I've become a complete snob about it. It's dead easy to do, actually, and once you've started doing that you sort of don't want to use bought mayo anymore, at least not for sauces to have with food or stick on a burger / sandwich, etc.


Boiled egg, what? Take that out, pinch of paprika and you're grand.


The egg is optional but paprika can gtfo.

Yeah phonics, what the fuck? Paprika in Tartar sounds completely wrong. Like ketchup on pizza or something.

[Mazuuurk]

BTW I'm also in camp Mustard*

But here in Sweden mustard is quite a widespread standard condiment for most stuff.



*not to be taken out of context

[phonics]

Neutralises the citrus and gives it a fuller flavour imo.

[Mazuuurk]

Err, then just skip the lemon in it if you don't like the citrus?

Otherwise it's like drawing the curtains but turning the light on, in broad daylight.

[Lewis]

Imagine ruining good fish and chips with that pish. Then again, if you're in cod country then whatever takes the taste of that shit away.

[Disco]

Wholegrain mustard is great, it not only improves pretty much any meat based sandwich but it also annoys my dad because it's generally French.

[Mazuuurk]

Imagine ruining good fish and chips with that pish. Then again, if you're in cod country then whatever takes the taste of that shit away.

What do you mean? I rarely eat Fish & Chips in Sweden, it's usually in English pubs I'll get it served with Tartar sauce. And if you think Tartar is pish you're a lost soul.

If you're referring to Phonics paprika aberration, then yeah, I'm with you there.

[phonics]

Lads, try it. I'm not saying dump a vat of the stuff in. Just a pinch.

[Mazuuurk]

Like fuck am I. Next thing you'll say put Hummus on a burger or Rice with beef or something like that.

[phonics]

I'm not magic, I'm mf phonics.

[Jimmy Floyd]

What is 'cod country'? Anywhere outside Whitby?

[Lewis]

Wherever it is the default fish. I went to Whitby a few weeks ago, and as soon as it starts getting dark it turns from lovely fishing port to toilet, possibly because post-Brexit race hate has kept Count Dracula indoors.

[Adamski]

Lobster and scallops for dinner last night. Pricey but delicious. They gave me two bits of cutlery that I've no idea what they were for.


Rogano? :drool:

[Giggles]

Boiled egg in tartare sauce? What?

[niko_cee]

What is the go to fish of 'and chip' fame then? Vietnamese catfish?

I always think fish at the chippy is ludicrously overpriced.

[Giggles]

Dunno about Vietnamese, but catfish is the nicest one I ever tasted. Blackened catfish at that.

[igor_balis]

had catfish stew in budapest, was flippin wicked

[Giggles]

If I ever go back it's the first place I'm hitting.

http://catfishparlour.com/south-austin---menu.html

[Ian]

Rogano? :drool:

Is that a type of dish or a type of cutlery?

[Magic]

Isn't it a type of pasta?

[Adamski]

Is that a type of dish or a type of cutlery?

No it's the best seafood restaurant in Glasgow.

[Mazuuurk]

Wherever it is the default fish. I went to Whitby a few weeks ago, and as soon as it starts getting dark it turns from lovely fishing port to toilet, possibly because post-Brexit race hate has kept Count Dracula indoors.

Well then Sweden doesn't really qualify either. 20 years ago maybe, but since then we overfished and Eastern Europe poisoned the Baltic sea, so these days Cod is a fucking "delicacy", simply by virtue of being rare.

[Magic]

I just paid a fiver for a beetroot juice. :harold:

[Mazuuurk]

Glad to hear you have your priorities right.

[Jimmy Floyd]

I think we get sold Chinese wank that isn't cod as 'cod'. Cod is meant to be more sustainable these days though.

[Mazuuurk]

It's more sustainable wherever they have fairly strict limitations of how much you can fish, basically, just like with anything.

[Giggles]

'Cod' is pollock or coley these days isn't it?

[Ian]

No it's the best seafood restaurant in Glasgow.

Oh. No I was in the Isle of Man. Rings a bell though, I think my friend's brother works there.

[Ian]

Seafood from my holiday.

Queen scallops with garlic and bacon:
http://imgur.com/vfC1PPd.jpg

Lobster and queen scallops:
http://imgur.com/ndC35NY.jpg

And saving the least interesting picture for last, a kipper, rocket and salsa baguette:
http://i.imgur.com/0ehFkC3.jpg

And it was all :drool:

[Baz]

You're gonna end up on here (http://pohtpof.tumblr.com).

[Boydy]

Half of them aren't even hipsters. :nono:

[Disco]

Two instances of square plates on the first page alone, burn them all down.

[Boydy]

Two instances of square plates on the first page alone, burn them all down.

At least square plates are still plates (http://wewantplates.com/).

[Ian]

Place near my hotel advertised itself as the home of "steak on a stone." Not really sure what the point is supposed to be.

[Disco]

At least square plates are still plates (http://wewantplates.com/).

Fuck me, we're deep inside the rabbit hole now.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

You're gonna end up on here (http://pohtpof.tumblr.com).

They're just copying the Asians.

[Boydy]

Place near my hotel advertised itself as the home of "steak on a stone." Not really sure what the point is supposed to be.

That's the heated stone thing that you're meant to cook your steak on yourself rather than it just being a shitty plate substitute. Still sounds like a shitty idea.

[Disco]

If I went to a restaurant and they expected me to cook the food myself I think I'd probably just leave.

[John]

That stone steak thing is good if you're a slow eater because it means every bite is fresh and hot, but it is a bit of a faff and I wouldn't bother with it again.

You must have looked like a right div taking a picture of a baguette, Ian.

[Ian]

I was the only one in there and even the chap behind the counter had wandered off.

That one was more being surprised at the price (about a fiver, including the salad, pasta, spuds, etc.) while I was talking to my sister about it on Whatsapp. I don't use Facebook or Instagram or anything so I only make a twat of myself taking pictures of food if it's for a specific reason rather than, say, the guy at my work who apparently has some mad urge to photograph basically every dinner he has or cooks to put on Instagram.

[Mazuuurk]

On the topic of hipstery - how large food snobs are you guys?

For every year that passes, I've noticed I'm becoming more and more faffy about the food I cook and eat, to the point where I've become what I probably used to despise 5 years ago.

[Ian]

I don't think I'm very snobby. For all that I'll pay lots for good stuff like the above and I like cooking nice stuff I still enjoy junk as well. My lunch last Saturday was basically just a bowl of breaded chicken bits that I found on offer in Co-Op.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

I can eat anything and will eat anything without a problem.

Bar beetroot, aniseed, raisins, blue cheese and things which have alcohol in them which hasn't been burned off (I am aware that it doesn't burn it all away but the flavour it brings with a reduced alcohol content is ok with me).

[Alan Shearer The 2nd]

I'll eat anything apart from olives. Girlfriend is a fussy eater and doesn't like red meat so it's a massive pain in the arse trying to get a bit of variety when cooking meals together.

[Boydy]

What have you got against alcohol, Mahow?

[Disco]

I'm not a big fan of alcohol in food, I had to stage an intervention when my mother starting putting beer in stew/casserole.

[John]

I know someone who swears by Buckfast in a shepherd's pie, but I don't have the jakey credentials to try it.

[Ian]

MacGregor's Pie Howff in Glasgow do a 'duckfast' pie which I tried more because I like duck (I've never tried Buckfast) and it was cracking. How easilythe same or a similar gravy could have been achieved without Buckfast I don't know but it was nice all the same.

[Giggles]

I started putting wine or stout in my stews and really like it. Kind of tastes like something is missing if I don't now.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

What have you got against alcohol, Mahow?
I don't like the taste of it, I hated the my Dad used to get drunk and talk shit about my Mum when I was young and I hate the idea of getting drunk and not being in control.

The cam girl got me to drink 2-3 cocktails when I was out there and I hated it. Tasted foul.

[niko_cee]

Cocktails in provincial Ukraine?

Hmmm.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

It was just orange or cherry juice mixed with, presumably, vodka.

[igor_balis]

I don't think I am a food snob. I can be quite picky about quality of ingredients, but only with certain things. I hate cheap sliced bread, and to use a more niche example I really hate cheap tinned tomatoes for cooking with (they're shit and watery and dilute the taste of whatever it is you're making).

People who turn their nose up at any prole food are wankers, but I don't like it when people try to claim that there's no difference between shit ingredients and good ingredients. Perfect example is my old flat-mate who'd make fucking spag bol on an almost nightly basis, would always use shit smart price tinned tomatoes then be all 'hmm I dunno why it is so watery'. Yet when I tentatively suggested it might be the cheap tinned tomatoes it just wouldn't compute.

He was so committed to this idea that paying more money for expensive stuff like that was like falling for a scam or something. Fair enough with stuff like own-brand paracetamol which is pretty much identical to the more expensive stuff, but it isn't like that with everything.

[Boydy]

I've always found passata works better than chopped tomatoes but maybe that's because I always bought the cheapo chopped tomatoes.

[igor_balis]

Though actually now I think about it he'd always pour a bit of water into his spag bol as it was cooking to 'make it go further' so it was probably more that than the tomatoes.

[Disco]

I use cheapo tomatoes for making lasagne, they are more watery but you can just reduce the mixture down a bit more to compensate.

[igor_balis]

Yeah and bang in some tomato puree if you have any. I think it is more an issue of my dickhead ex-flatmate being a shit cook, I'll experiment with them and get back to TTH with my findings.

[Lewis]

My brother is a massive [food] dickhead, so last Christmas I bought some of that mega Aldi fudge (the seemingly special festive stuff that sells out within seconds) so that I could give him some and then go 'It's from Aldi, you fat-headed twat!', like Jeremy Beadle, but I did all four boxes in before I had the chance.

[John]

He'd pour water into it and then wonder why it was watery? :D

[igor_balis]

He'd pour water into it and then wonder why it was watery? :D

I KNOW. He was a weirdo in general though. He drank 4 litres of pepsi max everyday, and my mate who visited refers to him as 'two pizzas' because when he was round we watched him eat two big pizzas for dinner. One was a garlic bread pizza thing, but still.

[Ian]

Your mate thinks that somebody eating two big pizzas is noteworthy enough to make a nickname out of it?

[igor_balis]

Your mate thinks that somebody eating two big pizzas is noteworthy enough to make a nickname out of it?

Not in isolation - it is more what the pizzas represented. He was a slovenly fat bastard who did nasty farts all the time and just generally had a weird demeanour. I'm sure if he ate two big pizzas and was a top bloke he'd have internalised his incredulity.

[John]

I have a mate who's spent about fifteen years called 'Ten Cans' because he once lied about having drank ten cans of Stella before a night out. It happened before I knew him but the name's stuck and even his parents call him by it now.

[Raoul Duke]

Within reason, I try and buy decent ingredients depending on what I'm making. It's all about working out where you can get away with a cheaper substitute vs. where you need to spring for the good shit. There's no chance I'm not getting proper Heinz ketchup for example, but likewise cheaping out on a steak will leave you feeling like you're eating a shoe.

I try to buy organic stuff if I can, and avoid over-produced food. I try and limit the amount of meat I eat as well.

[randomlegend]

I'm definitely a chocolate snob.

[Pepe]

Heinz ketchup 'good stuff.' :harold:

All ketchup is shit to be fair, apart from some homemade ones, and even then.

[Giggles]

I only buy Hellman's ketchup but I'd eat any of them if I got handed something with it on. I love sauces that much that I rarely eat ketchup though.

I used to know a lad always dosed his dinner with it. Christmas dinner and all.

[Lewis]

I don't consider myself to be much a brand wanker, but I did always lol at my Trotskyist housemate and his Co-op toothpaste.

[Magic]

Heinz ketchup 'good stuff.' :harold:

All ketchup is shit to be fair, apart from some homemade ones, and even then.

The fuck is this shit?

[Boydy]

Fuck buying Heinz ketchup. It's not that good. It's also only bloody ketchup. Anything you're eating it on is hardly haute cuisine.

[Lewis]

I wonder what the worst thing is when you go for the cheap shit. I reckon it might be ice cream, which is just foam below a certain price.

[Magic]

Tinned steak chunks.

[Baz]

Anyone watch that Joe Wicks Body Coach on channel 4 earlier? He's so David Brent, it's unbearable.

[John]

I wonder what the worst thing is when you go for the cheap shit. I reckon it might be ice cream, which is just foam below a certain price.

Chicken. I once tried an 'Everyday Value' Tesco chicken nugget, which apparently sell at sixty odd pence for twenty, and it must have been about ninety five percent feet.

[igor_balis]

Anyone watch that Joe Wicks Body Coach on channel 4 earlier? He's so David Brent, it's unbearable.
Saw a video of him in a 'cringe youtube' thread, he's absolutely unbearable.

[Giggles]

Chicken. I once tried an 'Everyday Value' Tesco chicken nugget, which apparently sell at sixty odd pence for twenty, and it must have been about ninety five percent feet.

The feet are worth a fortune to the Asian market so it'd be cheaper to make it from breast. They'll be Baader meat, which is the name of the machine that scrapes the carcass, and grain filler.

[igor_balis]

I don't consider myself to be much a brand wanker, but I did always lol at my Trotskyist housemate and his Co-op toothpaste.
My mate used to use tesco value deodorant which was pretty bad, but then I found out another friend makes his own weird deodorant out of fucking olive oil or some shit, and doesn't use shampoo despite not getting a haircut (except occasionally trimming bits off himself) 'since Clinton was in the white house' so I look a lot more favourably on the former now.

[Mazuuurk]

Wait, Mahow actually met the Cam girl in the end?!

[Ian]

Igor's mates aren't having a good night on TTH.

[Disco]

Mechanically reclaimed is such a lovely phrase when applied to something you're supposed to eat.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Wait, Mahow actually met the Cam girl in the end?!

Yeah I detailed it all in a thread about weird shit I do, which started off as me saying I talk to myself in a fictional language out loud.

Oh and Coke has to be the worst for the cheap stuff if drinks are included. I bought a 9p 2L bottle from Sainsburys when I was 13 once, it was a horrible experience.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Mechanically reclaimed is such a lovely phrase when applied to something you're supposed to eat.
http://www.snopes.com/food/graphics/msm.jpg

Delicious chickeny soft serve :drool:

[Disco]

Bread. Fuck off Braces, I vowed years ago to go hungry if that was the only option.

[Reg]

Yeah I detailed it all in a thread about weird shit I do, which started off as me saying I talk to myself in a fictional language out loud.

Oh and Coke has to be the worst for the cheap stuff if drinks are included. I bought a 9p 2L bottle from Sainsburys when I was 13 once, it was a horrible experience.
Used to go and buy Sainsburys 2L lemonade and a stick of French bread as a kid. Good times.

What's the best stuff (relatively) when cheap? I'd say fruit or chocolate.

[Disco]

I wouldn't say chocolate, the cheap stuff is just oil and sawdust. Some veg maybe, it always amuses me that a bag of slightly wonky carrots is cheaper, because it really matters once you've cut them up put in something.

[John]

Used to go and buy Sainsburys 2L lemonade and a stick of French bread as a kid. Good times.

What's the best stuff (relatively) when cheap? I'd say fruit or chocolate.

:D No normal child buys a stick of French bread from a shop which also sells Swiss rolls and biscuits.

The correct answer to that is crisps, or maybe dried pasta.

[Pepe]

Is Heinz ketchup expensive over there or what? I thought it was just your average brand.

[Bartholomert]

This thread needs more pictures of yummy food.

[Mazuuurk]

Yeah I detailed it all in a thread about weird shit I do, which started off as me saying I talk to myself in a fictional language out loud.

Oh and Coke has to be the worst for the cheap stuff if drinks are included. I bought a 9p 2L bottle from Sainsburys when I was 13 once, it was a horrible experience.

I can never tell when people are being ironic or sarkastic on here anymore. I don't get it but I'm guessing you're wooshing me somehow.

[Spammer]

Made a piping hot chili last night. Was well nice but it's sent my digestive system into meltdown.

[Bernanke]

Why have I taken so long to "understand" omelettes? :drool: Just whipped one together by frying some thinly sliced raw potatoes and fresh salsiccia in rosemary, then adding a few tomatoes and the eggs. Goddamn.

[Giggles]

Why have I taken so long to "understand" omelettes? :drool: Just whipped one together by frying some thinly sliced raw potatoes and fresh salsiccia in rosemary, then adding a few tomatoes and the eggs. Goddamn.

Replace the potatoes, tomatoes, and whatever salsiccia is with bacon, mushrooms, and cheese and you're sorted.

[Bernanke]

Oh, I had a bunch of manchego in there as well.

Fuck mushrooms.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Went a bit fancy tonight.

Had a porterhouse steak, mini roasted potatoes, garlic cavolo nero and a mushroom and bone marrow sauce.

Was pretty fucking amazing.

[phonics]

Oh, I had a bunch of manchego in there as well.

Fuck mushrooms.

Spanish omelettes are nice but I always feel a bit bloaty after them. I normally go with a potatoes+chorizo+spinach and red peppers if I am going to do one.

I remember one time I was really poor and made an omelette only for the salt shaker to come undone as I was seasoning it. Most depressing meal I've ever had.

[hfswjyr]

You still sound salty about it...

[Disco]

To be fair there's not mushroom for other emotions when something like that happens.

[Giggles]

Shouldn't have to eggsplain yourself.

[randomlegend]

To be fair there's not mushroom for other emotions when something like that happens.

I do this pun literally every time we make pizzas (which is quite often).

"Don't put too many of those on....you won't have MUSHROOM for anything else HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA".

[Disco]

You should keep doing it, a good pun get better with repetition and age.

[igor_balis]

There's a handful of corner shops around here that do surprisingly tasty sandwiches and wraps for almost worryingly low prices. It is hard to motivate myself to make sandwiches to take to work when I can get a chicken tikka wrap that is full to bursting for £1.40. God only knows what kind of chicken goes in them.

[Disco]

For that money you really should be calling it 'chicken'.

[John]

Reminds me of a snack van that pitched up near me, now gone/closed, which had its own take on the 'munchy box' featuring 'chicken bits' with a load of other shit for three quid. No chickens were harmed in the making of that product, I suspect.

[igor_balis]

Also deffo worth repeating that the M&S "New York Deli Style" pastrami on rye sandwich is by far the most delicious prepacked supermarket sandwich I've ever had, and probably the only poncy premium range supermarket sandwich worth the extra expense.

[Dark Soldier]

Also deffo worth repeating that the M&S "New York Deli Style" pastrami on rye sandwich is by far the most delicious prepacked supermarket sandwich I've ever had, and probably the only poncy premium range supermarket sandwich worth the extra expense.

Nah mate this is the absolute daddy of supermarket sarnies:

http://www.tesco.com/groceries/product/details/?id=277375270

[Lewis]

Pre-packed sandwiches are all shit.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

There's an Indian inspired chicken sandwich that Sainburys do which is stunning.

Tikka (IIRC), mango chutney, raita, onion bhaji and spinach on a nigella seed bread.

[John]

I was walking past Pret a Manger the other day and noticed they were selling two boiled eggs in a tub with some lettuce for three quid. That sandwich might be shit, I've only tried the 'pit beef' and 'ham hock' Finest sandwiches, but it's definitely more worth the price than that fucking disgrace.

[Dark Soldier]

I still don't eat veg bar the odd bit of onion and lettuce (not counting spuds), so my sandwich options are very limited and its probably why my skin is a nice hue of grey these days.

[igor_balis]

I was walking past Pret a Manger the other day and noticed they were selling two boiled eggs in a tub with some lettuce for three quid. That sandwich might be shit, I've only tried the 'pit beef' and 'ham hock' Finest sandwiches, but it's definitely more worth the price than that fucking disgrace.

Pret is fucking awful. Genuinely think their sandwiches are worse than most mid-range supermarket offerings, let alone the finest/taste the difference lot.

My opinion is somewhat shaped by being dragged there by my mum's insistent boyfriend the morning after my last night out in Liverpool. All I wanted was to get a greasy fry-up where I felt comfortable to be stinky and hungover, whereas I had to sit in the middle of Liverpool One eating a dry £5 pastrami sandwich, whilst worrying I was going to shit myself.

[Raoul Duke]

The Pret cheese and ham toastie is absolutely gangsta. I think they must mix cocaine in with the mustard, it's that addictive.

[Giggles]

https://www.theguardian.com/sport/gallery/2016/sep/08/nfl-stadium-food-meat-in-pictures


:drool:

[igor_balis]

My old work colleague is buying me a curry tonight. :cool:

Gonna get something mild so I don't shit myself tomorrow.

[Boydy]

I'm gonna have a go at making my own lamb kofte tonight.

[John]

https://www.theguardian.com/sport/gallery/2016/sep/08/nfl-stadium-food-meat-in-pictures


:drool:

For fuck sake. We get an overcooked pie that's slightly stuck to the bottom of the tin or a burger that would shatter like glass if you dropped it in stadiums.

[Giggles]

For fuck sake. We get an overcooked pie that's slightly stuck to the bottom of the tin or a burger that would shatter like glass if you dropped it in stadiums.

This was the peak, though in fairness the chips look half decent.

369547107813691392

[Giggles]

Once upon a time, but no fucking chance now.


http://www.dailyedge.ie/wicklow-pub-burger-2971292-Sep2016/


It’s a 32oz burger and, in true food challenge style, if you finish it in less than 32 minutes you get the whole thing for free.

http://img2.thejournal.ie/inline/2971318/original


I pass by it regularly though so I'm going to see just how close can I get some day.

[randomlegend]

I know this is my third post on it, but this place is unreal:

https://www.instagram.com/figbarnorwich/

Had this the other day from there:

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/Cq5WCyiWcAEgcgl.jpg:large


MOJITO
minted kaffir lime mousse, lime curd, rum ice cream,
brown sugar, lime sherbet

SO good.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

https://www.theguardian.com/sport/gallery/2016/sep/08/nfl-stadium-food-meat-in-pictures


:drool:
That brisket sandwich looks fucking incredible.

Hopefully the Rams will have something amazing too, should I get tickets.

[Jimmy Floyd]

I was thinking the other day the sheer number of cows and pigs there must have to be in America to keep producing the amount of beef and pork that is required to keep their civilisation going.

[Magic]

Ok so I bought a Cezve and some Colombian roast ground as such that it could be made the Turkish way.

It is absolutely stunning.

[Ian]

I was thinking the other day the sheer number of cows and pigs there must have to be in America to keep producing the amount of beef and pork that is required to keep their civilisation going.

I'm sure I've read some of the big farming states have about five times as many cattle as people.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

I'm sure I've read some of the big farming states have about five times as many cattle as people.

http://beef2live.com/story-cattle-inventory-vs-human-population-state-0-114255

South Dakota :cool:

Rhode Island and New Jersey should be wiped off the planet.

I also know that Denmark has 5 times as many pigs as it does people.

Last night and tonight I've made Korean BBQ tacos and they've been amazing. Marinated short ribs, garlic fried tatsoi, Chinese cabbage, black beans, guacamole, green salsa and a bit of coriander to finish. Just a shame that taco shells/wraps/tortillas are shit in England.

[Adamski]

I'm off on Friday so I'm going to make some Char Sui Bao, Korean Fried Chicken Bao and pork & prawn dumplings :drool:

[Disco]

Bao. :drool:

Making the dough can be annoying but the bao freeze really well so giant batches are much easier.

[Adamski]

Yeah that's what I'll do, just make shitloads and freeze it then it's less hassle the next time.

[Magic]

I just ate a full bag of nuts which is equal to:

900kcal
75g of fats (15g saturates)
40g of carbs (20g sugars)
30g of protien (FUCK YEAH)

[Giggles]

Bet they were fucking lovely though.

[Disco]

Fish and Chips (the crisps rather than the full meal) now come in pickled onion flavour. They aren't bad but I still take issue with the size of the bags (take note Hula Hoops and Frazzles), they're stupidly small.

[Pepe]

Nuts. :drool:

I go through a pack of cashews each week. This week they didn't have the unsalted ones so I got almonds instead. Cashews are miles better.

[Disco]

I just ate a full bag of nuts which is equal to:

900kcal
75g of fats (15g saturates)
40g of carbs (20g sugars)
30g of protien (FUCK YEAH)

Are you sure that's right? Because that's a lot of calories.

[Lewis]

Fish and Chips (the crisps rather than the full meal) now come in pickled onion flavour. They aren't bad but I still take issue with the size of the bags (take note Hula Hoops and Frazzles), they're stupidly small.

Buy one of the big bags then.

[Disco]

I've never seen them.

[Lewis]

125 grams, mate. lol at the concept of the 'share bag' though.

[Giggles]

Are you sure that's right? Because that's a lot of calories.

These aren't all that big and there's 1166 in it.

http://m.tesco.ie/mt/www.tesco.ie/groceries/Product/Details/?id=266376222

[Disco]

These aren't all that big and there's 1166 in it.

http://m.tesco.ie/mt/www.tesco.ie/groceries/Product/Details/?id=266376222

We must barely metabolise them then, because RDI is about 2000 cal and 900 kcal is 900000 calories. Or am I missing something.


125 grams, mate. lol at the concept of the 'share bag' though.

In order to share crisps with someone I'd either need to be sleeping with them or have a bag about as big as I am.

[Giggles]

We must barely metabolise them then, because RDI is about 2000 cal and 900 kcal is 900000 calories. Or am I missing something.



In order to share crisps with someone I'd either need to be sleeping with them or have a bag about as big as I am.

RDI is in kcal. You never see them in just cal.

http://www.nhs.uk/chq/pages/1126.aspx?categoryid=51


Within a healthy, balanced diet, a man needs around 10,500kJ (2,500Kcal) a day to maintain his weight. For a woman, that figure is around 8,400kJ (2,000Kcal) a day.

[Lewis]

Are you mixing that up with the kilojoules bullshit?

[Disco]

Oh, I had the RDI in the wrong units, that explains it.

[John]

We must barely metabolise them then, because RDI is about 2000 cal and 900 kcal is 900000 calories. Or am I missing something.

The unit nomenclature for that stuff is arse backwards. A 'calorie' isn't the same as a 'Calorie'. One 'Calorie' is one thousand 'calories', or one 'kcal'. RDI is measured in 'Calories'.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Disco has had a mare here.

[igor_balis]

i like cashew nuts too

[Magic]

It is a lot of calories regardless. Boiled eggs for dinner. :(

[Pepe]

Just add twenty miles next time you cycle and eat away.

[Disco]

Disco has had a mare here.

It's all good, I was just asking a question, it's probably fifteen years since I paid attention to calories/Calories.

And anyway, hands up everyone who went to the Ukraine without a jumper.

[Foe]

Just drink a green tea afterwards. Sorted.

*Foe logic may not provide desirable results.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Decided to make a very different type of curry today.

I took loads of vegetables, cooked them a little bit then puréed them up with some spices, added some coconut milk and some beef.

Tasty but I need to add some more chilli powder and possibly some more coconut as the sauce isn't as cohesive as I'd like it to be.

[Magic]

Sounds like a wet influenza inspired shat.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Sounds like a wet influenza inspired shat.

Not a patch on potato dauphinoise and peri peri chicken, clearly.

[Giggles]

Decided to make a very different type of curry today.

I took loads of vegetables, cooked them a little bit then puréed them up with some spices, added some coconut milk and some beef.

Tasty but I need to add some more chilli powder and possibly some more coconut as the sauce isn't as cohesive as I'd like it to be.

I used to do similar when I had made a big batch of veg soup and was bored of it. Just used it in place of tinned tomatoes in a curry.

[Disco]

Why don't you just put some chillies in with the veg mix, they'd taste better than powder. If you're using coconut milk you could try the dried stuff instead, might be easier to thicken it up as you can control the amount of moisture you add.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Why don't you just put some chillies in with the veg mix, they'd taste better than powder. If you're using coconut milk you could try the dried stuff instead, might be easier to thicken it up as you can control the amount of moisture you add.

I added two red chillies and then a tablespoon or so of kashmiri chilli powder (I bought loads of dried ones and ground them down).

Not enough heat for me though.

[Boydy]

I just made a halloumi and bacon salad with some griddle yellow pepper and tomatoes on a bed of spinach and rocket. It looks so pretty I almost don't want to eat it.

[randomlegend]

Even I'm not that gay.

[Boydy]

I said almost. I'm eating it. It's fucking delicious.

[Giggles]

I'd eat the cheese and bacon off the top if it.

[Adamski]

Do you not like salad?

[Giggles]

Do you not like salad?

What's to like? Salad is just something you have to eat for diet purposes. I could shovel it down if I was on that routine but it's hardly enjoyable.

[Adamski]

I'm off on Friday so I'm going to make some Char Sui Bao, Korean Fried Chicken Bao and chicken & prawn dumplings :drool:

I went for Hoisin pulled pork bao with pork and prawn dumplings. They were awesome.

Would heartily recommend this pork for the Bao Disco. Recipe below if you fancy it

http://drizzleanddip.com/2014/08/18/gua-bao-with-hoisin-and-ginger-pulled-pork

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Went to a local Mediterranean tapas place today. We ordered the following:

Calamari, grilled sardines, whitebait, houmous, taramasalata, bademjansalata (an aubergine dip), koukia (broad beans in olive oil, garlic and chilli), halloumi, spanakopita, beef dolmades, pastourma, lamb souvlaki, patatas bravas and some rice with grilled vegetables mixed through.

It was all brilliant, I was surprised by the aubergine dip too as I've never been too keen on them but the other flavours in it carried it well.

[Ian]

There's a tapas place about twenty yards from my office that does a lunchtime deal of three dishes for £7. It's really good. Chorizo in cider. :drool:

[Lewis]

The quite excellent Heron are doing tubs of this (http://www.waitrose.com/shop/DisplayProductFlyout?productId=382284) for a quid. It is really good in its own right, if more like a frozen creamy thing than actual ice cream, but look at the nutritional value of it. Why hasn't it taken over the world? Even at its lol actual price you would expect wankers to be falling over themselves to buy it if that vitamin water bollocks has a market.

[phonics]

Is ice cream all you eat, you fat cunt?

[Giggles]

I don't know what lucuma is.