Mahow's all new, all new, all new food thread

[niko_cee]

Mayo has egg in it, aioli doesn't.

That stuff has HEUVO in the ingredient list.

It's Doum (or whatever it is called - the Lebanese one) that is just an impossible mix of garlic and oil.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Hmm. Not sure the proper stuff does. There might be some hellish burger joint version that does.

[Boydy]

Had to look up Kamado Joe to see what the hell it was. The price of those, fucking hell. It can't be that much better than a regular barbecue from B&Q, can it?

[Giggles]

Not really. I won mine. There's better out there for similar money or less.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

£900?!?!

Fucking hell.

[Andy]

You can smoke on a kamado joe for like 16-20 hours on a small load of charcoal, they're ceramic so hold the heat really well and use less fuel. There are a lot of benefits to getting one if you're into outdoor cooking.

Like anything it's more about the skills of the person using it than the actual bbq, you can get just as good results with a £150 smoker but the Kamado comes with a life time guarantee and plenty of accessories and attachments so draws people in.

BBQ a bit like cycling is aimed at middle aged men who love pissing money away on gadgets so they'll always sell well.

Costco do a replica kamado for half the price which other than the colour looks identical.

[Andy]

£900?!?!

Fucking hell.

Thats for the classic size, the biggest ones are nearly £2000.

[-james-]

It took me 28 years on this planet to realise that I do like mayo, just not the crap you get in a bottle. Homemade mayo is absolutely glorious stuff.

[Adamski]

I have a Weber Mastertouch, will probably investing in a Kamado joe later in the year. Have been into BBQ/smoking for a while now.

Get some decent charcoal and some wood chunks and there's loads of content on Instagram and YouTube.

Cheers. Pizza oven seems easy enough but not sure about the BBQ. Got time to figure it out!

[Luca]

Hmm. Not sure the proper stuff does. There might be some hellish burger joint version that does.

This is correct. The traditional Spanish allioli is basically toum - garlic, salt, lemon, olive oil.

[Luca]

That being said, Italian aioli usually has an egg yolk.

[Dquincy]

I ate a petrol station hot sausage roll today and I think my body is punishing me for it. :(

It was the only one in the hot counter. Might have been there for a week for all I know.

[Dquincy]

3rd shit of the day.

Shall keep you posted.

[Spikey M]

We've got Fajitas tonight so we can facetime from the bog later if you want?

[Dquincy]

:lol:

[Kikó]

Primary school favourite, cornflake cake being made tonight :drool:

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/Evz4EyPWQAEX8_p?format=jpg&name=large

[Jimmy Floyd]

We used to get something called 'Swiss toffee apple' which was cornflakes above a layer of whipped cream and a layer of stewed apples. Couldn't pay me to eat it now but to nine year old me it was nectar from the heavens.

[Kikó]

I don't know what happens with the drop off between primary school and high school but primary school had some eclectic mixes of proper food and dessert handed over to you while high school consisted of 5 years of burgers and chips combos. I never ate, or saw a vegetable in high school.

[Shindig]

Yeah, it was all burgers and coke. These are the school dinners Rashford fights for. I'm guessing, with more students to cater for, it leans much more on processed mush.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

My secondary school wasn't too bad with dinners. There was your usual shit (a breaded turkey burger with salad cream was a lovely breaktime snack tbh) but they also had a normal meal with dessert option.

I always loved school dinners as other than a roast and shepherds pie I wouldn't have English food at home.

[Jimmy Floyd]

I think (I say this cautiously as I went to an independent school at secondary, but I'm pretty sure we got the same dinners as the plebs) secondary school food is basically like prison food where they stuff you full of chips or whatever to shut you up. Primary school kids presumably hardly eat anything so must be done on a weird and probably very cynical calorie calculation with whatever the cheap supply is.

Turkey twizzlers being banned was a dark day for us at age 14/15.

[Lewis]

I lived right behind my primary school, and my mother worked part-time, so I either came home for dinner or got a packed one. I never once had a primary school dinner. Secondary school we've covered before how fortunate we were to ride that window where the quality had improved by order of Tony Blair but Jamie Oliver and the healthy eating nonces hadn't ruined it, so it was stodge and chips every day. :drool:

[Lewis]

My school had you on rotation between the proper dining hall, that the entire school used, and which had a better selection of stodge and even some non-chip options (rice, annihilated vegetables, etc.), and smaller areas exclusive to each year that literally just had pizzas and burgers, but by virtue of not doing chips or hot puddings were considered the healthier alternative. The dining hall was expanded in I think 2003 to have an actual fast food lane doling out sweaty burgers/hotdogs and chips (sweaty because they were wrapped up like real fast food so you could help yourself), and it was absolutely amazing, but they had bricked it up and shot everyone responsible by the time I had left the sixth form.

Did those of you in more vibrant areas get a suitable choice of foreign muck? My school was 99.9% white, which probably explained our options, but there was normally something claiming to be chicken curry on the go. I bet they have them on all sorts of diverse filth now.

[Jimmy Floyd]

We had a lot of Asians (20%, maybe) and I don't remember curry being a thing. If it was, only the odd time, not as a permanent fixture.

The thing I remember was all the crisps and chocolate being turned out of the vending machines in sixth form, and replaced by things like parsnip crisps and rice crackers. From that moment it was pretty much a ten year express train to Brexit.

[Disco]

Outside of 'tea' after sports I don't think I ever had food cooked at school, packed lunch all the way through.

[Foe]

Yeah, our academy had a little tuc shop run by a lady from a local newsagents that used to sell your usual crisps and chocolate selections. By my final year that had been BANNED and only healthier snacks were allowed which created an underground snacks trade.

They also tried to stop all the fatties buying pies and cakes form the local bakery that sent a van up by keeping the gates closed. So the van just parked on the other side of gate and continued.

[Lewis]

The first time I ever had curry was in year three when we were learning about India and they got the half-Indian lad's mum in to make one in front of us like some Great Exhibition freakshow. The morning task building up to it was to craft a spoon for ourselves out of a piece of paper to understand what it was like for Indians not having proper cutlery (but obviously lots of quality writing paper since everyone needed several attempts). She must have thought the school was mental.

[Spikey M]

I remember our school introducing us to religion. Starting with, for some reason, Hinduism. Complete with stickers on our foreheads and tea-towel turbans. Good Times.

[randomlegend]

We used a have a tuck shop thing called the 'Snack Shack' which was out by the playground. They used to sell these massive hunks of cheesy bread (probably about half the size of a house brick) and little pizzas made on pitta breads at break time. They cost pittance and they were amazing.

[randomlegend]

They also had a competiton to rename the canteen after I left. The winning name was "House of Munch" but they vetoed it and went with the second place, which was something wank like Nutrition.

[randomlegend]

https://www.kitchenknifeforums.com/attachments/img_20210305_192413-jpg.116998/

Mapo tofu and rice.

[Shindig]

There's so much empty space on that plate.

[randomlegend]

It's a pasta bowl, the shitty phone camera makes it look really odd.

[Pepe]

Tofu :harold:

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Ordered from my local Japanese tonight and whilst pricey it was glorious.

Ribeye teriyaki :drool:

Also them putting Gherkins in the special fried rice is a winner.

[Luca]

I can’t find the drinking thread, but I’ve just had a delicious Verdejo pet-nat from Spain. It’s all green apple, grapefruit, and funk. :drool:

[Dquincy]

Made myself a smoothie this morning. It had:

Broccoli
Spinach
Porridge oats
Banana
Cow milk
Hazelnut milk
Frozen strawberries
Frozen blueberries

I like being able to put in healthy things such as broccoli which would otherwise taste grim on their own. I'm an innovator.

[Kikó]

Broccoli :-/

Avocado is a good savoury option.

[Dquincy]

Broccoli :-/

Avocado is a good savoury option.

Good shout with the Av's. I put some of that in yesterday with whey protein powder.

Have you (or anyone) blended cooked chicken into a smoothie? I've heard it's a thing. Helps get your calories count up.

[niko_cee]

This discussion should not be in the food thread.

[Kikó]

Smoothies are fine. Shredded chicken in one is arrestable.

[Ian]

Some oddball whose name I forget was on Off Menu recently and took the Molton diet to the next level and just sometimes blends up a couple of chicken breasts for a meal.

What a miserable time.

[Spikey M]

Have you (or anyone) blended cooked chicken into a smoothie? I've heard it's a thing. Helps get your calories count up.

Quince, I loves ya, but this is the worst post of all time.

Apologise. Now.

[Kikó]

*quinceOn* my friend says if I blend raw egg and vitamin D tablets into a vegetable blend smoothie it will cure cancer but I'm not sure it will. Any one got an article saying it isn't true? *quinceOff*

[Dquincy]

Quince, I loves ya, but this is the worst post of all time.

Apologise. Now.

:lol: I was just being inquisitive. Apologies.

But...IF I do it, I'll report back here.

[Dquincy]

*quinceOn* my friend says if I blend raw egg and vitamin D tablets into a vegetable blend smoothie it will cure cancer but I'm not sure it will. Any one got an article saying it isn't true? *quinceOff*

:D

I thought this was a safe space. I was wrong.

[Shindig]

Blended chicken sounds like something you'd keep canned in a bomb shelter.

[Ian]

I'm still not sure it's worse than Molton's chicken on pasta. At least drinking chicken slurry would get it over with sooner.

Are the pictures of that lost to us now?

[Spikey M]

Along with the story of how he made himself a prisoner in his own home, yes.

[Shindig]

And the story of him sending his lass on the side away on a moped that crashed.

[Kikó]

:D

I thought this was a safe space. I was wrong.

It's a safe space but you will have the piss ripped out of you.

[Raoul Duke]

Just wait until Quncy discovers chicken soup. He's gonna lose his mind

[Reg]

Some oddball whose name I forget was on Off Menu recently and took the Molton diet to the next level and just sometimes blends up a couple of chicken breasts for a meal.

What a miserable time.
I found James Acaster's obvious disappointment in having someone like that on the show quite funny.

[Kikó]

Just an aside, James Acaster is supposed to be a massive cunt.

[niko_cee]

He's definitely got a bit of a Will Self style sneering (but not in a good way) vibe to him.

[Lewis]

He got cucked by Mr Bean. It's a wonder he can still make light of anything.

[Baz]

He got cucked by Mr Bean. It's a wonder he can still make light of anything.Eh?

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Eh?

Bean stole Acaster's girlfriend.

[Ian]

I quite like Acaster as these things go but it wouldn't surprise me if he's a dickhead, Ed Gamble seems like he might be too but I'm not basing that on much so I might be being a bit unfair.


He got cucked by Mr Bean. It's a wonder he can still make light of anything.

Dunno if I was aware of this and forgot but that's a proper bit of Vince McMahon booking right there.

[Dquincy]

This is The Mountain's (from Game of Thrones) daily diet and exercise routine. His shits must be immense.

6:50 am - morning workout (cardio & core) glutamine and a handful of almonds

7:30am - eight eggs, avocado, 200g oats with blueberries and strawberries

9:30am - 400g beef, 400g sweet potato, handful of spinach and greens

11:50am - BCAA and Glutamine

12:00pm - 400g chicken, 400g potatoes, greens and fruit

2:00pm - blender of 150g oats, two bananas, 150g cereal, frozen berries, handful of almonds, peanut butters and glutamine

2:30pm - strongman training - BCAA, glutamine and vitargo

5:30pm - 60g protein, two bananas

6:00pm - 500g beef, potatoes and greens

8:30pm - 500g salmon, 550g sweet potatoes

10:30pm - six eggs, avocado, 30g almonds, 50g peanut butter

[Lewis]

I cannot wait to watch him and Eddie Hall box. It's going to be absolutely shit but fucking hell if Eddie chins him. :drool:

[Shindig]

Does it get that far when you're burning it off?

[niko_cee]

Dead by 50.

[Kikó]

I've had a mega sirloin steak for dinner tonight and I'm ready to die.

[Spikey M]

I cannot wait to watch him and Eddie Hall box. It's going to be absolutely shit but fucking hell if Eddie chins him. :drool:

From what I've seen of their training it's not even going to be close. "Thor" has the speed and mobility of an oil tanker. Eddie moves like a featherweight in comparison.

[Lewis]

Yeah but he's half a retard and probably won't feel half of it.

[Dquincy]

Does it get that far when you're burning it off?

Good point. My research tells me that they are heavier.

[Dquincy]

Wasn't sure where to put this, but as there is a reference to food, I'll stick it here.

Orlando is a bit of a strange fella. :D

1373544161857699840

[Shindig]

90% Plant-based. It's just a surname, you ponce. :D

[Manc]

He was gleaming on GN the other week. Tremendous effort.

[Disco]

I spend a lot of my time dreaming about roles for myself and others - for minorities and women...

Really doing his bit there.

[Spikey M]

https://i2.wp.com/batflipsandnerds.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/05/DbyhepwWkAEc-hl.jpg?resize=592%2C350&ssl=1

"Film idea; Orlando Bloom saves a black woman, a gay and a cripple from a fire at a Quinoa factory"

[Don]

Haha, look at him rejecting carcinogenic meat and COVID inducing lunches.

[niko_cee]

https://i2.wp.com/batflipsandnerds.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/05/DbyhepwWkAEc-hl.jpg?resize=592%2C350&ssl=1

"Film idea; Orlando Bloom saves a black woman, a gay and a cripple from a fire at a Quinoa factory"

:D

[Dquincy]

https://i2.wp.com/batflipsandnerds.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/05/DbyhepwWkAEc-hl.jpg?resize=592%2C350&ssl=1

"Film idea; Orlando Bloom saves a black woman, a gay and a cripple from a fire at a Quinoa factory"
Brilliant. :D

Also this.
1373639559066611712

[Lewis]

Is 'brain octane oil' one of those things Alex Jones endorses?

[Spikey M]

Brilliant. :D

Also this.
1373639559066611712

:lol:

[Offshore Toon]

Is 'brain octane oil' one of those things Alex Jones endorses?
It seems like MCT oil (basically coconut oil) and supposedly helps with fat burning.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

https://cdn.shopify.com/s/files/1/0004/3470/0319/products/bulletproof-brain-octane-oil-bottle-16-oz-1200x1200-af_800x.jpg?v=1602864524

It's also bulletproof.

[randomlegend]

If that interview is real then it looks like he wasn't acting when he did his episode of Extras.

[igor_balis]

Made a lovely butternut squash soup tonight. Soup is cool.

[Spikey M]

Igor Bloom

[Dquincy]

Made a lovely butternut squash soup tonight. Soup is cool.

Enjoy a good butternut squash soup. Hope it had chilly flakes in it though.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

To make it colder?

[Dquincy]

Chilli, Ffs.

[Dquincy]

1375069296448184321

[Lofty]

Savoury hot cross buns: novel or nasty?

[niko_cee]

The cheese and marmite ones are absolutely rancid.

[Disco]

I love the idea of hot cross buns but they give me chronic indigestion almost immediately.

[Lewis]

I can't see the point of these savoury ones, but I am once again recommending using them to make bacon sandwiches.

[Dquincy]

The M&S salted caramel and chocolate chip ones are immense.

Thank me later.

[Spikey M]

Finally got our Rotisserie Airfrier and we're making Chicken Donner Kebabs for dinner tonight.

Been marinating since about 8am and just put it onto the stick and grippers which was a bit of an ordeal.

https://i.ibb.co/bsbLNKp/20210327-172211.jpg (https://ibb.co/Yc08fLv)

[Kikó]

:drool:

[Andy]

I made airfryer KFC today. Unreal and not a drop of oil used.

[Dquincy]

I made airfryer KFC today. Unreal and not a drop of oil used.

Did you use buttermilk, or some other coating?

[Baz]

I had actual KFC today.

Had my first zinger burger but it’s not for me. (I also had a boneless banquet prior, so all was not lost.)

[Spikey M]

Had my first zinger burger but it’s not for me.

The secret is to tower up but ask them not to put Ketchup in. (Who the fuck has Ketchup and Mayo in a chicken burger ffs.)

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

It always has to be towered.

[Baz]

Mayo is acceptable but ketchup on chicken (including chicken nuggets) is just odd.

What is towered? Like 2 of them, Big Mac style? If I didn’t like one, I can’t see my liking two anymore.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

They lob a hash brown in.

[Spikey M]

And cheese. Don't sell it short.

[randomlegend]

Did beef barbacoa tacos tonight. They were BANGER.

[Spikey M]

https://2.bp.blogspot.com/_hYtFwYbfwFA/Scu9gFbodJI/AAAAAAAAAMU/oAHeRHDPX1Y/s280/zt+matrix.jpg

[randomlegend]

That's the most nineties picture in the world.

[Spikey M]

That's the most nineties picture in the world.

Take the red pill

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

And cheese. Don't sell it short.

I've never had a non-tower burger so I assumed cheese came with the standard.

[Baz]

Nah. It’s the zinger bit, it’s just not nice. Was cheeseless. Lots of wet lettuce though.

My problem is the boneless banquet isn’t filling enough so I tried to compensate by adding a zinger burger. Mistake. What I’ll do next time is order 2 boneless banquets and give 1 of the chips and 1 of the popcorn chicken boxes to my daughter (this is all a kids meal is, + a fruit shoot) and add the extra 3 mini fillets to my banquet. Was her first KFC though and it was well received.

When I’m sharing with Mike and/or The Reid no problems arise cos we just get the 8/12 piece boneless box, but my Missus wanted a rice box, rather than anything good, so I was struggling.

[Dquincy]

Put your big boy pants on and have meat on the bone from a bucket.

[Spikey M]

I've never had a non-tower burger so I assumed cheese came with the standard.

It should, but no.

Although I do like Baz's Tower Big Mac idea. You could use the hashbrown instead of the middle bit of bread. Double chicken. Double cheese. Double Mayo. Still no ketchup ("salsa"). :drool:

[Pepe]

Beef barbacoa. :harold:

[randomlegend]

Is that because it's meant to be lamb/pork?

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Or goat.

[Pepe]

When I think barbacoa, I think of lamb cooked in a hole on the ground. But I guess people can call whatever they want barbacoa. Good barbacoa is delicious, but I trust very few places in Mexico to do it right. I've had some shit ones numerous times.

[randomlegend]

It was nice, authentic or not.

[Spikey M]

Please tell me you dug a hole in the garden. If not you're a liar and a fraud.

[Lewis]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XmdxzXivbnU

:cool:

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Fuck that looks incredible.

[Lewis]

The full channel is ace. He must be the most content human being since Fred Dibnah.

[Jimmy Floyd]

7 hours? Seems like the process spanned the changing of seasons.

[Lofty]

I thought the seal around the lid would starve the fire of oxygen but I was wrong, obviously.

[Don]

My Azeri brother. That would be me if I didn't have the privelege of an education to realise meat is wrong.

[Spikey M]

I'm glad this wounded vegan act isn't getting boring.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

I thought the seal around the lid would starve the fire of oxygen but I was wrong, obviously.

It surely would with no pot of water.

[randomlegend]

Please tell me you dug a hole in the garden. If not you're a liar and a fraud.

I'll bury you in my fucking garden m9

[igor_balis]

the zinger tower burger is by far the best thing kfc do fuck you baz you daft twat

[Spikey M]

the zinger tower burger is by far the best thing kfc do fuck you baz you daft twat

Nothing in McDonald's or Burger King gets close either.

[Disco]

I'll bury you in my fucking garden m9

And your dog will dig him up again.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

And your dog will dig him up again.

He'll bury the dog too. Problem solved.

[randomlegend]

And your dog will dig him up again.

True

[Luca]

There’s a Mexican place here run by an old school couple who will do whole lamb barbacoa (pretty sure they cook it in a pit in their backyard then bring it to the restaurant) and a fuck off pot of menudo if you give them a couple days’ notice.

It’s absolutely the tits.

[Shindig]

I finally ate that shit mac and cheese that's been sitting in the cupboard for a year. Still horrific but I ate the whole thing this time. Still mushy and terrible but it tasted better without the butter I decided to slip into it last time. Plus I attacked it like I only had seconds to eat it. As soon as that taste lingers, I regret everything.

[phonics]

What should I get for tea?

https://i.imgur.com/9htfoer.png

[Spikey M]

Kebbes plate

[Jimmy Floyd]

Lamb and merguez skewers

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

One of the Lebanese plates because raisins are shit.

[Luca]

36 francs for a basic tajine is fucking bonkers. :D

[phonics]

36 francs for a basic tajine is fucking bonkers. :D


12 Francs less than a Big Mac.

[Baz]

I had two large bacon double cheeseburger meals for dinner and homemade pizza for tea. I feel like such a fat lump. :sick:

[Boydy]

Those Lotus Biscoff Sandwich biscuits are fucking superb.

[-james-]

I've become a little bit obsessed with the tomato sandwich. What I have learned:

Medium sized on the vine tomatoes are best. You can cheat the UK's terrible tomato climate by seasoning with red wine vinegar, salt and plenty of pepper and letting it sit for five minutes while you make everything else.

Fresh white sandwich bread is king but it doesn't really matter as long as it's not tough crusty sourdough or similar.

I like the mayo blended with a jarred roasted red pepper and a pickled jalapeno or two.

Bit of spinach and maybe fry up some capers.

:drool:

[Ian]

I'm sure that's probably nice but it's far more effort than I'm ever going to put into a tomato sandwich.

I did make myself a club sandwich though recently, which was mega.

[niko_cee]

I'd never heard of a tomato sandwich prior to that post, and was initially appalled, but the extra effort probably makes it pretty decent. Sounds a lot of faff though.

[Ian]

Yeah I do wonder about the starting point for that. The concept of a tomato sandwich on its own wouldn't ever have occurred to me.

[Don]

Big backing for that but not sure if it's possible to get proper tomatoes in this gammon wasteland. Not that it matters to me any more :cool:

White bread though? Yeah why not just stab yourself in the guts and get to your destination more quickly.

[-james-]

The beauty is in the lack of faff. You're eating in under ten minutes.

Easy to double up with a cheese & tomato toastie if you're feeling decadent as well.

[Jimmy Floyd]

It takes me ten minutes just to put the blender together, never mind the rest.

[Boydy]

Tomato and onion sandwiches are quality.

So are tuna and onion which I had for lunch today.

[Spikey M]

The state of the sandwich nonces.

Cheese. Onion. Mayo. Done. :drool:

Although I had exactly the same lunch as Boyd today.

[Raoul Duke]

Ham, salad, wholegrain mustard + mayo is where it's at

[Ian]

Speaking of mango chutney I was short of things to put in a sandwich with some cheddar the other day and opted for a slightly spicy mango chutney I have in the fridge. One of my top decisions of 2018 so far.

I'm still going strong on this.

[Lewis]

Simplicity is the key to sandwiches. Once people start overwhelming them it might as well just all be mixed in a bowl.

[phonics]

Cheese and Mayo is a fucking rank mix.

[Waffdon]

Onions don’t belong on sandwiches

[Jimmy Floyd]

I've been doing cheese with that tomato relish that's meant to go on burgers, can't be beaten (without effort, anyway).

[Spikey M]

Cheese and Mayo is a fucking rank mix.


Onions don’t belong on sandwiches

Look at the state of these cunts. Offensive.

[Offshore Toon]

I've had cherry tomatoes by themselves in sandwiches before and it is good. Raw onion is probably the king of veg when it comes to sandwiches but also means you have to brush your teeth fifty times before leaving the house.

[Waffdon]

Exactly. Not worry the hassle.

[Raoul Duke]

Halved cherry tomatoes on a sliced bagel with cream cheese :cool:

[Manc]

Ploughman's is king.

[Spikey M]

As long as there's no egg mayo freaks on the board we'll be alright.

[Don]

Views on piccalilli? Used to like it but tried it again after long time and the COVID tastebuds really got in the way of my enjoyment. Might just have got a shit brand.

[Shindig]

Not a fan. I'd sooner roll deep on some pease pudding.

[Spikey M]

Views on piccalilli? Used to like it but tried it again after long time and the COVID tastebuds really got in the way of my enjoyment. Might just have got a shit brand.

I've only ever eaten it at Christmas, but I went right off it too last Christmas. Maybe they've changed it.

[igor_balis]

Cheese and mayo is rank, phonics is right. Using mayo instead of/as well as butter in all of your sandwiches is proper ITV behaviour.

An ex used to have mayo with everything including fry ups and roasts, though looking back it was possibly just a symptom of her chronic alcoholism, along with thinking having sex with me was a good idea. Maybe she knocked the former on the head along with the latter when she got diagnosed with pancreatitis and told she'd be dead in a year if she kept drinking.

[Shindig]

Yep. That's an igor post.

[Spikey M]

Alot of judgement from a man that eats the arseholes of strangers.

[Boydy]

As long as there's no egg mayo freaks on the board we'll be alright.

Egg and onion :drool:

[Baz]

Going here (https://32781424-1ef2-47a5-a20f-7ca3e5c7a976.filesusr.com/ugd/9e7157_1cd0db8589c0416d82f1658396c9648a.pdf) soon. Any recommendations for someone who normally gets a chicken tikka bhuna? Preferably nothing hotter.

[Ian]

I quite like a karahi sometimes and it doesn't look like theirs is very hot.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Nothing on that menu sounds particularly hot, which makes me think that some of it probably is.

God I'm hungry now.

[Spikey M]

Yeah I want a curry now.

[Don]

Chicken breast with roast pepper sauce, you gammon.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

https://www.bbcgoodfood.com/recipes/pomegranate-chicken-almond-couscous

Made this today.

Really quick and easy but pretty damn tasty.

Also served it with some fried broccoli with zaatar.

[Manc]

Those macros. :drool:

[Jimmy Floyd]

I've just been shown this recipe which a family member has found in a cookbook, really struggling to get my head around it.

https://i.ibb.co/mcFfLWy/Screenshot-20210701-124334-Whats-App.jpg (https://ibb.co/DRg0x2M)

Is this the worst dish ever conceived?

[randomlegend]

I bet it tastes nice, tbh.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

I've just been shown this recipe which a family member has found in a cookbook, really struggling to get my head around it.

https://i.ibb.co/mcFfLWy/Screenshot-20210701-124334-Whats-App.jpg (https://ibb.co/DRg0x2M)

Is this the worst dish ever conceived?

I raise you:

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/CUHQnL8XIAAowuU.jpg

[Manc]

Give up. :D

[Ian]

These are less aggressively unpleasant than the one Mahow posted, but:

1394383550020046855

[Luca]

I've just been shown this recipe which a family member has found in a cookbook, really struggling to get my head around it.

https://i.ibb.co/mcFfLWy/Screenshot-20210701-124334-Whats-App.jpg (https://ibb.co/DRg0x2M)

Is this the worst dish ever conceived?

This looks like a bog standard (rank) American casserole from the 1960s.

In terms of weird shit that works, I made a chocolate tobacco truffle from Jennifer McLagan’s Bitter that was phenomenal. Basically steeped a bit of cigar in some cream and used it to make a truffle. All sorts of smoky and spicy.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Yes, I've since discovered that baking meat in soup and cream is something Americans do. No wonder they have mass shootings every day.

[Spikey M]

We had a cake day at work a few years back
and the big boss brought in a Tomato Soup Cake which she harassed everyone into trying because it was "surprisingly nice".

It was unsurprisingly horrid.

Why even bother making something if any level of "niceness" is surprising? Just make a Vicky Sponge ffs.

[Manc]

Surely that's just a tomato cake.

[Spikey M]

It's an abomination whatever you call it.

https://veggiedesserts.com/tomato-soup-cake/

[Jimmy Floyd]

I do hope we're not heading for 1950s-70s retro food being a thing. They barely had enough to eat then. 'Creativity' was turning the tin upside down.

[Ian]

Surely that's just a tomato cake.

The recipes Google first threw up for me were thinly veiled ads for Campbell's tomato soup so I guess that's how it came about and had that name rather than just tomato cake.

It sounds rank anyway.

[Shindig]

We had a cake day at work a few years back
and the big boss brought in a Tomato Soup Cake which she harassed everyone into trying because it was "surprisingly nice".

It was unsurprisingly horrid.

Why even bother making something if any level of "niceness" is surprising? Just make a Vicky Sponge ffs.

We had someone in the office bring it in. As subtle as it was, you could still tell it tasted like a can of soup soaked into sponge. It's like something you'd make on accident and then never try again.

[Baz]

Man, coconuts are not worth the effort.

[Disco]

The comma really carries that sentence.

[Pepe]

:D

[randomlegend]

I know I'm setting myself up for a fall posting this, but I built myself a little outdoor kitchen workstation thing out of a granite worktop offcut I got off facebook marketplace and some timber.

I am unreasonably pleased with myself for how it came out.

https://www.kitchenknifeforums.com/attachments/1626785777996-png.134873/
https://www.kitchenknifeforums.com/attachments/1626785764984-png.134872/
https://www.kitchenknifeforums.com/attachments/1626785794463-png.134874/

Garden is a tip, that's the next job now the house is mostly sorted.

[randomlegend]

It weighs approximately the same as the house does.

[Manc]

Is the lawn still fucked from the dog digging? Looks thirsty af.

[randomlegend]

The lawn is just fucked full stop, I've given up on it for now. We might even put artificial grass down to help with the girls hayfever (which is legitimately the worst I've ever seen).

[Don]

Put down the filthy dog first before resorting to artificial grass.

[Manc]

Get Baz in.

[randomlegend]

Put down the filthy dog first before resorting to artificial grass.

Nah I've paid for the wedding and everything.

[Spikey M]

Our lawn is a mess as well. The house sat empty for months before we bought it so the grass was overgrown and the weeds and moss had largely taken over. We got this (https://smile.amazon.co.uk/dp/B08JQP8J6X/ref=cm_sw_r_tw_apa_glt_i_MQJ98KBMH25HHZV8CVTG?_enc oding=UTF8&psc=1) to deal with the weeds, which was oddly therapeutic, but now we just have a patch of mud that we're trying to rescue.

Probably going to have to wait until Autumn as the kids playing out there won't give the grass seed time to bed in.

I fucking hate gardening.

[Baz]

Get Baz in.
My wife disrespecting me by employing the worlds oldest gardener backfired when he didn’t turn up for 7 weeks so I finally cut it and now it’s dead, cos it went from super long to freshly cut (albeit on the longest setting my rubbish mower does) and then the suns scorched it to death.

Fuck you, “Garden Man.”

[randomlegend]

Our soil is a fucking disgrace, it's absolutely rammed full of builders rubble.

[Disco]

That looks pretty good, if I was being very picky the bottom rail would ideally be flush or inside the legs so you don't clout your ankles on it but that's less of an issue outside.

[Andy]

I know I'm setting myself up for a fall posting this, but I built myself a little outdoor kitchen workstation thing out of a granite worktop offcut I got off facebook marketplace and some timber.

I am unreasonably pleased with myself for how it came out.

https://www.kitchenknifeforums.com/attachments/1626785777996-png.134873/
https://www.kitchenknifeforums.com/attachments/1626785764984-png.134872/
https://www.kitchenknifeforums.com/attachments/1626785794463-png.134874/

Garden is a tip, that's the next job now the house is mostly sorted.


Decent for a DIY effort.

I am in the middle of building an outside kitchen at the moment, taking me ages. Doesn't help that it's always either pissing it down for 30+ degrees when I get in from work.

[Spikey M]

Decent for a DIY effort.

I am in the middle of building an outside kitchen at the moment, taking me ages. Doesn't help that it's always either pissing it down for 30+ degrees when I get in from work.

I wouldn't look at the weather for the next 2 weeks if I were you. :moop:

[Raoul Duke]

Having moved from a house to an apartment, the thing I miss the least - and the most - is the garden. Perpetual struggle to keep it not looking like downtown Aleppo but when the sun is out it can't be beat.

Your kitchen workstation thing looks nice, RL :thbup:

[randomlegend]

https://i.imgur.com/wI3jbcC.jpg

Dinner. Made some little lamb patties, flatbreads, tahini, roasted carrots with harissa, yoghurt, sumac and coriander. Very nice indeed.

[Ian]

Knowing this place I'm surprised that didn't spark an unnecessarily heated discussion about the merits of different variants of Pepsi.

[Giggles]

The can of the new cherry max is far too similar to the regular max can. I've been caught twice now.

[niko_cee]

I can't speak to the Pepsi Max variety, but I always thought that gold coke shit was one of the most pointless drinks going. Just go with fizzy water if you don't want a coke that much.

I have some of those cherry max cans in the fridge having been bought for a party or something. Absolutely abhorrent.

[Spikey M]

Isn't gold coke just caffeine free? It still tastes like coke. Where as fizzy water tastes like the discharge of Igors latest victim.

[Baz]

Raspberry Pepsi Max is better than cherry.

[niko_cee]

Isn't it the diet caffeine free one? Thus tasting like a 50/50 mix of diet coke (horrific) and water, or is that a different one?

[Giggles]

Raspberry Pepsi Max is better than cherry.
Normal max is better than any of them.

[-james-]

Fizzy juice is for plebs.

[Ian]

I can't remember who (maybe Sama, RIP) but somebody tried to tell me cherry Pepsi Max was some sort of life-changing drink of the Gods and it just turned out to be A.N.Other soft drink.

[Giggles]

Fizzy juice is for plebs.

Is there a such thing as a fizzy 'juice' or are you still 5?

[Giggles]

I can't remember who (maybe Sama, RIP) but somebody tried to tell me cherry Pepsi Max was some sort of life-changing drink of the Gods and it just turned out to be A.N.Other soft drink.

It's grand, probably nicer than Dr. Pepper, but it does nothing for a dose of the drought like the normal one.

[-james-]

Is there a such thing as a fizzy 'juice' or are you still 5?

Ooh, rattled. I don't keep up with the terminology, but I'm referring to coke, pepsi, sprite etc.

[Spikey M]

I don't think "fizzy juice" was ever up to date.

[Ian]

I think it's lol that Scots use 'juice' but then I use 'pop' if I use a catch-all term at all which sounds like it's off the 60s so I can't really claim to be using an up to date term either.

But that doesn't stop 'juice' being a silly word for it.

[Kikó]

Knowing this place I'm surprised that didn't spark an unnecessarily heated discussion about the merits of different variants of Pepsi.

Mission accomplished.

[Ian]

Yeah I realised as I'd posted it I was probably causing the thing to happen.

[niko_cee]

I think it's lol that Scots use 'juice' but then I use 'pop' if I use a catch-all term at all which sounds like it's off the 60s so I can't really claim to be using an up to date term either.

But that doesn't stop 'juice' being a silly word for it.

'Ginger' being a catch-all fizzy drink term took me a while to get to grips with.

[Ian]

I've never sounded more English than the day a jakey I worked with said she was going home to a 'bottle of wine' and in the interest of making conversation I asked whether she liked white or red and she looked at me like I was a fucking idiot and said "Bucky."

[Giggles]

That’s like the nordies too. Buckfast is the single biggest example of why they’re all more aligned with Scotland than us.

[SvN]

I've never heard of Buckfast before. When Ian said Bucky, the only thing I could think of was Bucks Fizz :D Which seemed like an odd choice.

[Ian]

I'm surprised you've never heard of it at all, if only as part of Scottish stereotypes.

It's definitely been discussed on here a few times.

[-james-]

I've never sounded more English than the day a jakey I worked with said she was going home to a 'bottle of wine' and in the interest of making conversation I asked whether she liked white or red and she looked at me like I was a fucking idiot and said "Bucky."

:lol:

I don't think I've heard anyone call it wine before. 'Tonic' is more common.

[Ian]

I would say in my experience I've heard it as 'wine' more than just 'tonic' but maybe it depends which particular scabby bit you happen to be in.

Either way, what I was talking about was to her 'table wine' apparently.

[Disco]

Those monks must be fucking minted by now.

[-james-]

Air fryers. Talk to me.

[Spikey M]

Big fan, but get one of the basket ones. We have one with shelves / a rotisserie and it just lives in the cupboard.

[Luca]

Just buy a deep fryer and don’t be a little bitch.

[Spikey M]

He's already Scottish, give his arteries a chance ffs.

[Luca]

The Mediterranean blood will see him through.

[Andy]

Air fryers. Talk to me.

I got a Ninja airfryer on prime day, amazing piece of kit. Rarely use my oven these days.

[Giggles]

I have the one with the rotating paddle but I think I'd go back to the basket one if I was replacing it. Great bit of kit, it's like a more powerful mini oven that cooks everything quicker than the packet says. Not sure where Luca is getting the deep fat fryer comparison from at all, they don't do remotely the same thing in most cases.

[Boydy]

Aren't they marketed as a healthy replacement for deep fat frying?

[Spikey M]

Sometimes, but they aren't. You couldn't cook fresh battered fish in an AirFrier and you couldn't reheat pizza in a deep fat frier (well, you could, but...).

It's just a powerful fan oven.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Could I throw out my microwave and replace it with one?

[Spikey M]

I doubt it, but it depends what you use the microwave for really. I doubt it would be able to cook the microwave meals in plastic containers without melting / warping them, but it's definitely replaced the microwave when it comes to rehearing most things.

[Ian]

You couldn't cook fresh battered fish in an AirFrier

Can you not? I thought you could do stuff like that, fried chicken, etc.?

Or is there something specifically different about fish batter?

[Spikey M]

Can you not? I thought you could do stuff like that, fried chicken, etc.?

Or is there something specifically different about fish batter?

I mean if you were to make the batter yourself. I imagine it would just drip through the basket and you'd barely end up with any on the fish. I could be wrong though, I've not actually tried.

[Spikey M]

A quick Google for 'Airfrier battered fish" just gives loads of fish in breadcrumbs recipes, so I think I'm right on the batter not working.

[Jimmy Floyd]

I doubt it, but it depends what you use the microwave for really. I doubt it would be able to cook the microwave meals in plastic containers without melting / warping them, but it's definitely replaced the microwave when it comes to rehearing most things.

Reheating what I cooked last night. Pasta, say. Or is it just for manly dry items like meat and chips?

[Spikey M]

Mostly dry stuff I'd say. Any form of sauce is just going to go dry and cause a mess.

[Ian]

https://bluejeanchef.com/recipes/beer-battered-fish/

Obviously I can't speak from experience given I was asking the question but that looks like decent batter and is specifically doing it in an air fryer.

[Spikey M]

It looks decent enough, but it's not proper fish and chip shop batter. You could do that in an oven too.

The easiest way to look at an AirFrier is just as a small but powerful fan oven.

[Kikó]

I love my air fryer but I do wish it had a compartment for doing anything saucy. Chicken and fish are the standouts.

[Jimmy Floyd]

I can barely eat dry food, so looks like the microwave survives. Sorry for doubting you, old pal.

[Giggles]

The one I have with the paddle can do wet meals. I’ve made casseroles in it before.