Mahow's all new, all new, all new food thread

[Ian]

https://www.gizmodo.co.uk/2020/08/heston-blumenthals-full-english-sandwich-sounds-horrible/

Coffe-flavoured mushroom ketchup and baked bean flavoured bread. No thanks.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Holly Brockwell reporting for the Sarcasm Times.

[Ian]

I can find you a less bantsy article in which the sandwich still sounds vile, if you'd prefer.

[Jimmy Floyd]

To be honest as soon as I saw that Heston Blumenthal had made a sandwich and was making it available for sale at £3.85, it was going to take something of Dostoyevskian literary values to swing my opinion positively.

[randomlegend]

I don't like either baked beans or coffee, but I can't see either of those things being that bad if I did.

[Boydy]

I'd give it a go but I'd argue anyone having coffee with a fry up instead of tea is a wrong un.

[SvN]

If it wasn't for the coffee flavoured ketchup (fucking ugh) then I'd give it a go.

[Disco]

Coffee aside they're all things you would eat in a fry up in basically the same arrangement so it can't be that bad.

[Offshore Toon]

It's obviously nice. They just shoehorn certain ingredients in there to pique interest.

I don't know why baked bean bread is supposed to be so terrible? If it was sun-dried tomato bread nobody would care, and I bet they taste similar as they'll be basing the baked bean taste off the sauce.

[Luca]

Had a wood-fired pizza that Giggles would have turned his nose at. It was glorious.

[Shindig]

Speaking of bread, the previously indestructible cheap loafs from Tesco now mould up after a few days. It wasn't like this before lockdown.

[Giggles]

Incoming lamb malai :drool:

[Lewis]

The new Turkey Twizzlers aren't up to much. They're not bad, but if I wanted uninteresting and healthy-ish turkey sausages I could have got them anyway.

[Smjffy]

Salmon with chive mash mash potato and a prawn cream sauce. In hindsight I should have reduced the cream a little more and I wish I had done a pea puree instead of using balsamic but fuck it.

https://i.ibb.co/K5CKkn3/118210670-173385504290027-1909563846725319097-o.jpg

[Luca]

Salmon with chive mash mash potato and a prawn cream sauce. In hindsight I should have reduced the cream a little more and I wish I had done a pea puree instead of using balsamic but fuck it.

https://i.ibb.co/K5CKkn3/118210670-173385504290027-1909563846725319097-o.jpg

Food for thought, but instead of the chunks of prawn, could you make an intense prawn oil from the heads/shells and infuse the cream sauce with it?

[Ian]

But then you wouldn't have prawns.

I'd be all over that, Smiff.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

I like the look of that.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Even though I don't like prawns, I think I'd put up with them for how good the salmon and mash looks.

[Spikey M]

Even though I don't like prawns
This is the most offensive thing I've ever read.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Life is complicated. Sometimes people want you to put rubbery little pink things in your mouth that taste mildly of fish; sometimes they think it's disgusting.

[Kikó]

I think you're cooking them wrong.

[phonics]

...

I'm not taking the bait on that one. Too obvious.

[Offshore Toon]

#sheltered

[Smjffy]

Food for thought, but instead of the chunks of prawn, could you make an intense prawn oil from the heads/shells and infuse the cream sauce with it?

Truth be told it's not something that even crossed my mind but having Google'd it I reckon I could give it a stab next time. I've got complete freedom to do as I choose so if you've got any other suggestions then I'm all eyes.

I've had a couple of dishes hit the back of the net in the last two weeks or so which has been quite nice.

[Baz]

https://assets.sainsburys-groceries.co.uk/gol/7712113/1/640x640.jpg

I've been on the yogurt with nuts and seeds bandwagon for a long time, but earlier this week ran out of nuts so decided to throw some of the above in and my word. :drool: It originally started as a 'no carbs til teatime' idea but ehh that's out the window now cos these are a now a must-have ingredient to my dinnertime bowl.

[Giggles]

I've taken an awful liking to Krave.

[Luca]

Truth be told it's not something that even crossed my mind but having Google'd it I reckon I could give it a stab next time. I've got complete freedom to do as I choose so if you've got any other suggestions then I'm all eyes.

I've had a couple of dishes hit the back of the net in the last two weeks or so which has been quite nice.

Something about the two proteins (where one is 'part of the sauce' but also left quite chunky) sat strangely with me, and the prawn oil could be a way of stretching out food cost.

My other suggestions would be in terms of presentation - I'd go with a well of puree (vs. a lump of it) and then serve the salmon skin-up (with a hard sear on the skin) in the middle, with a thin layer of the cream sauce resting under the salmon in the middle of the well (but not poured over it, so that the seared skin presents nicely). Then I might also lose the green from the sauce and the puree and do a drizzle of chive oil instead - you might get the bright green pop you're looking for, especially if the puree is otherwise unadultered. You could still do fresh chives with the puree instead of an oil, I suppose, but I'd then consider maybe a healthy spoonful over the puree vs. cooked in it.

As you said, you could probably then lose the balsamic, as it's not adding anything taste-wise.

[Don]

Shut up, you bunch of melts.

1.
https://i.ibb.co/B3GZ38T/IMG-20200913-WA0028.jpg

2.
https://i.ibb.co/dpcDzPG/IMG-20200913-WA0023.jpg

3.
https://i.ibb.co/r6PtQ99/IMG-20200913-WA0021.jpg

[Spikey M]

SvN is posting foreskin pictures ban worthy?

[Don]

https://assets.sainsburys-groceries.co.uk/gol/7712113/1/640x640.jpg

I've been on the yogurt with nuts and seeds bandwagon for a long time, but earlier this week ran out of nuts so decided to throw some of the above in and my word. :drool: It originally started as a 'no carbs til teatime' idea but ehh that's out the window now cos these are a now a must-have ingredient to my dinnertime bowl.

18g of sugar per 100g. Put it down and never speak of it again.

[Baz]

The box is nearly gone and won’t be getting replenished.

[Luca]

Shut up, you bunch of melts.

1.
https://i.ibb.co/B3GZ38T/IMG-20200913-WA0028.jpg

2.
https://i.ibb.co/dpcDzPG/IMG-20200913-WA0023.jpg

3.
https://i.ibb.co/r6PtQ99/IMG-20200913-WA0021.jpg

This looks like a delicious Sunday morning hangover cure. :drool:

[Giggles]

Looks like something that has squirted out of road kill.

[Lewis]

I made risotto with the slow cooker and it was very good. #FBPE#WATON#ABTV

[Ian]

Making risotto sounds a bit cosmopolitan for you.

[Lewis]

If I want to keep eating rice whilst sticking it to the Chinese then the options are limited.

[Ian]

You could just live off Tilda microwave packs if you're prepared to eschew flavour but without going Full Molton.

[Lewis]

I could never go back to that bollocks after buying my amazing rice cooker (https://www.thethirdhalf.co.uk/showthread.php?49-Mahow-s-all-new-all-new-all-new-food-thread&p=320317&viewfull=1#post320317). I went for an Indian the other week to support them in their border dispute and I'm sure they gave me pouch rice.

[niko_cee]

Risotto in a slow/rice cooker sounds like the sort of thing that's going to trigger Luca big time.

[Giggles]

I had a pizza last night that would have him rocking in corner.

[Luca]

Eh. Risotto is tedious to make. It’s not how I’d do it, but I understand the convenience of a slow cooker.

Go on, Giggles. I feel like suffering.

[Spikey M]

Risotto is shit anyway, so you might as well do it wrong.

[Kikó]

Wrong.

[Spikey M]

Exactly.

[Baz]

The worst food in the world is couscous.

[Kikó]

Maybe worst grain but surely kidney (unless in a pie) or liver is worse?

[Shindig]

Kidney's alright but then my dad did bring a fair amount of that home. I've been conditioned.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Couscous, like rice or anything else, is contingent on what you put in it. I've had some Moroccan lamb things where it's absolutely glorious.

[niko_cee]

My father-in-law, who's a bit of a maverick in the kitchen having taken up the duties post retirement, swears by couscous with thai red curry. It's an abomination but he won't listen to reason.

90% of meals also accompanied with garlic bread which I'm sure must be ruinous from a health perspective.

[Giggles]

I like cous cous so long as it’s a fairly dry dish.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Couscous is great, the shittest grain is quinoa.

[Giggles]

Eh. Risotto is tedious to make. It’s not how I’d do it, but I understand the convenience of a slow cooker.

Go on, Giggles. I feel like suffering.

Imgur banned mobile, but it was :drool:

[Luca]

Imgur banned mobile, but it was :drool:

Just send it to us in The Group, mate.

[Giggles]

Just send it to us in The Group, mate.

It wouldn't have passed the approval steps were I in that.

[Boydy]

Shut up, you bunch of melts.

1.
https://i.ibb.co/B3GZ38T/IMG-20200913-WA0028.jpg

2.
https://i.ibb.co/dpcDzPG/IMG-20200913-WA0023.jpg

3.
https://i.ibb.co/r6PtQ99/IMG-20200913-WA0021.jpg

What the fuck was that?

[niko_cee]

Some sort of animal, with a honking great tongue.

[Jimmy Floyd]

I'm going sheep's head, I'm sure there's some brain in there.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

It does look like sheep's head.

I was fed sheep's head once or twice. Old age Cypriots will eat anything but will also quite happily share without letting you know what it is, especially when you're a child.

[Shindig]

What kind of dungeon upbringing is that? :D

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

It's part of their whole "nothing should be wasted" thing. Guess that's what happens when you're a shepherd in a large family with no money.

Nothing like my Dad shooting some sort of bird then cooking it and giving some of it to me only to say that it was a brain/lung/heart/testicle.

[Shindig]

My dad would tell me that stuff as he brought stuff home from work. Usually in a "There's all sorts in these sausages / burgers" way. The parson's nose is a delightful way of saying chicken's arse.

[Lewis]

What kind of dungeon upbringing is that? :D

https://www.thethirdhalf.co.uk/showthread.php?2601-What-is-your-opinion-on-Ketchup&p=375462&viewfull=1#post375462

[Giggles]

https://i.imgur.com/3ez8zjA.jpg

[niko_cee]

Hotdog crust?

:drool:

[Giggles]

Indeed. Means I get it all to myself too :cool:

[Spikey M]

That looks terrible.

[-james-]

That's just bread with a load of meat and cheese plonked on it. Is there even any tomato?

[Giggles]

Why would I want tomato when there’s meat and cheese?

[-james-]

Because it looks dry and bland. Acidity and moisture are good things.

[Kikó]

*paging Luca*

[Giggles]

Because it looks dry and bland. Acidity and moisture are good things.

Not if you want neither. Meat and cheese are good things for me.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

That looks like utter shit.

[Giggles]

It was amazing :drool:

[Pepe]

Looks good to me.

[Foe]

That looks terrible.

Awful looking pizza.

[igor_balis]

most disgusting combination of cheese and meat Giggles has inflicted on someone's mouth since he paid 5 euro for that blowjob in the back of his van

[Don]

What the fuck was that?

1. Sheep's feet
2. Sheep's brain
3. Sheep's tongue

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Khash_(dish)

Speakin of cheese, hit up a Georgian last night, had equivalent cheese to 4 pizzas. The 20% I could taste of the Khinkali (meat dumplings) and Khachapuri (bread with cheese and egg), I was impressed. The latter is just my lockdown soft boiled egg sandwich with inferior bread and needless cheese but still, I back the reviews of their cuisine.

[Giggles]

Eggs on a night out? That's worse than brain.

[Boydy]

1. Sheep's feet
2. Sheep's brain
3. Sheep's tongue

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Khash_(dish)

Speakin of cheese, hit up a Georgian last night, had equivalent cheese to 4 pizzas. The 20% I could taste of the Khinkali (meat dumplings) and Khachapuri (bread with cheese and egg), I was impressed. The latter is just my lockdown soft boiled egg sandwich with inferior bread and needless cheese but still, I back the reviews of their cuisine.

Mmm, delicious prions.

[Spikey M]

Lovely dose of Kuru.

[Don]

Lol, pure team panic chat.

[Kikó]

Which Georgian did you go to Taz? North London?

[Don]

Ya, Tamada? Was run by a delightful chap.

[Luca]

https://i.imgur.com/3ez8zjA.jpg

I wouldn’t have thought rabbit droppings would be good on pizza, but here we are.

[Luca]

Khash looks lovely. When’s your mum gonna have me round for some (again...left my pants there the last time).

[Lewis]

That pizza is atrocious. Pissing calzone crust.

[Spikey M]

The only way anyone could pretend to think the shite Taz posted looked good is if they were legitimately fucking his mum. So well in Luka. Impressive work.

[Don]

Everyone, can you please stop bad-mouthing Kaleh Pache?

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Your Mother has a lovely name.

[phonics]

In Taz’ defence, those are absolutely awful photos. Any food would look ming if you took a photo from a centimetre away and blew it up so big you could see it from space.

Edit; I take it all back, I just opened the tongue one and literally vomitted out the remains of yesterday’s drinking session.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

I doubt even the best photographer could make boiled sheep bits look good.

[Disco]

Do you do anything to it or is just boiled offal?

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Do you do anything to it or is just boiled offal?

According to the Wiki page it's boiled for a long time, seasoned with lemon and cinnamon (in Iran at least) and served for breakfast.

[Don]

You can piss about with Cinnamon, Turmeric, etc. Onions and lemon juice is the essentials along with raw garlic cloves as an accompaniment.

Western media consumption leading to the snowflake culture epidemic means its a bit of a marmite topic in Iran too. Will probably need to give them a few more years of climate change articles before they do a 180.

[Dquincy]

https://i.imgur.com/3ez8zjA.jpg

Hmmm, doesn't look right to me. The crust is f ing massive!

[Disco]

I'll take it over Giggles excuse for a pizza.

[Spikey M]

I'll take it over Giggles excuse for a pizza.

I mean, we're talking about a "would you rather fuck your mum and nobody knew about it, or not fuck your mum but everybody thinks you have" situation here.

[Disco]

Nothing wrong with offal if it's done nicely, you've inevitably eaten the same or worse in processed stuff.

[Luca]

Some form of offal soup is a classic hangover-cure breakfast the world around.

[Giggles]

Hmmm, doesn't look right to me. The crust is f ing massive!

Because, like Taz's Ma, it's full of sausage.

[Kikó]

Ya, Tamada? Was run by a delightful chap.

Will give it a go. This one is worth a go as well - http://www.iberiarestaurant.co.uk/

[Dquincy]

I mean, we're talking about a "would you rather fuck your mum and nobody knew about it, or not fuck your mum but everybody thinks you have" situation here.

Spikes showing his Canvey Island heritage.

[Spikey M]

Spikes showing his Canvey Island heritage.

Canvey Island? Cheeky Sheerness Cunt.

[Dquincy]

:lol: Minster, get it right.

[Giggles]

My local chipper has started doing incest sauce :drool:

[Shindig]

Nope. Google can't help me on this one. Or it did and this is very wrong.

[Giggles]

The peppery gravy they eat in the southern states of the USA.

[Shindig]

That sounds a lot more wholesome.

[Spikey M]

Gave home made fish and chips a go tonight. Half the price of a takeaway and the batter is better than anything we've ever had delivered. Not bad for a recipe out of the free Tesco magazine.

https://i.ibb.co/54KnxYz/IMG-20200929-WA0001.jpg

[Ian]

That looks pretty swish.

Did you deep fry or do you have an air fryer or something?

[Spikey M]

The chips were just an oven job. But the fish is deep fried. Was piss easy, always thought there'd be alot more to it that there is. Golden Ale in the batter and you only need half the bottle, so you get to knock back the other half as well.

[Luca]

Getting fish and chips (or anything battered and fried, for that matter) delivered is just never nice. Stuff like that needs to inflict, at minimum, second degree burns on your fingers/in your mouth. Them's the rules.

[Luca]

I saw Taz's mum's soup (oi oi) on the menu of a local Persian place - might have to investigate.

[Giggles]

Chips could have done with about 10 minutes more, but I’d happily eat it quicker than Taz’s aul one.

[niko_cee]

If you've already got oil for frying why are you not also chucking the chips in there?

Don't give me that they're oven chips or some shit, they fry up good too. Even more so if they're those inordinately expensive 'gastro' ones that (unbeknownst to me at the time) seem to come pre-loaded with oil/dripping already in them. :cab:/:drool:

[Giggles]

Definitely. Deep fried oven chips are class. Especially for the lack of faff they bring to the table (before Luca wades in to say all ‘fries’ must be quadruple cooked or some such nonsense).

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Luca harvests fresh duck fat himself for his chips.

[niko_cee]

I'm terrible at making actual chips, they never seem to work. My gran was amazing at it, I've no idea how, that seems to be the one area of cooking that the older generations didn't completely stuff up through the progress of the 50s to the 90s.

[Luca]

Here’s one area where I’ll concede the point: chips are chips. Even bad ones are usually pretty good. You can’t go wrong with a fried potato, unless you don’t salt it, or fucking bake it like some heathens on here. :nono:

[Baz]

I'm terrible at making actual chips, they never seem to work. My gran was amazing at it, I've no idea how, that seems to be the one area of cooking that the older generations didn't completely stuff up through the progress of the 50s to the 90s.

My Nan thinks beans go with lettuce.

[randomlegend]

My Nan thinks beans go with lettuce.

Perhaps we should let covid run amok after all.

[Ian]

Getting fish and chips (or anything battered and fried, for that matter) delivered is just never nice.

Maybe this is why the Scots invented the pizza crunch. It's a bit grim even fresh so nothing to ruin when you wait two hours for it on a Saturday night, presumably.

[igor_balis]

I made cajun/creole style deep dried catfish, which was pretty nice.

[Giggles]

Where did you get the catfish? I love the stuff.

[Luca]

He learned everything he knows about catfish from Mahow, iirc.

[Shindig]

He got it from Kiev?

[Boydy]

Found Giggles' twitter account:

1310646935246626816

[Lewis]

That 'Italian' one does look shit though.

[Spikey M]

If you've already got oil for frying why are you not also chucking the chips in there?

Don't give me that they're oven chips or some shit, they fry up good too. Even more so if they're those inordinately expensive 'gastro' ones that (unbeknownst to me at the time) seem to come pre-loaded with oil/dripping already in them. :cab:/:drool:

Because I have 2 kids to put to bed and oven chips are fine.

[Boydy]

No it doesn't. I'd happily eat both.

[Lewis]

It looks like they cooked it with concentration.

[Spikey M]

Found Giggles' twitter account:

1310646935246626816

the 'American' one wins hands down there and it isn't even close.

[Jimmy Floyd]

It really doesn't. The American one is late stage capitalism. A meal for the cameras. A pizza in an empty box.

The Italian one will stall be feeding Italians after the bombs have fallen. Substance, not style.

[Spikey M]

Keeping Italians alive is not a positive argument.

[Lewis]

I can't see any self-respecting Italian accepting that particular example, whatever the wider argument.

[Shindig]

Yeah, the ones I've had are the size of dustbin lids. The example they have is so quaint by comparison.

[Pepe]

I like the 'Italian' one better.

[Giggles]

You’d still be chewing the bread on the Italian one a week later.

[randomlegend]

The fact one is picture lit like a holocaust documentary whilst the other is lit like a Marvel film final battle makes quite a big difference.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Marvel film is a great analogy for American pizza. Pre-packaged, repetitive, cynically tailored for the market, designed by committee. Nothing real. Nothing that means anything.

[-james-]

Lads, what if, what if, right, what if they're both good.

[Giggles]

Marvel film is a great analogy for American pizza. Pre-packaged, repetitive, cynically tailored for the market, designed by committee. Nothing real. Nothing that means anything.

And not very fashionable to like if you’re keeping up piss and wind appearances.

[Ian]

Lads, what if, what if, right, what if they're both good.

We've had this conversation on here recently (not about pizza) and I was told that a being reasonable and balanced doesn't cut it. Pick a side and defend it as if somebody was threatening to kill your family.

[Lewis]

They are both good; but that 'Italian' pizza there looks half-defrosted.

[Kikó]

It really doesn't. The American one is late stage capitalism. A meal for the cameras. A pizza in an empty box.

The Italian one will stall be feeding Italians after the bombs have fallen. Substance, not style.

:thbgrin:

[Giggles]

:thbgrin:

He spelled dryness wrong.

[Kikó]

I think the only way to resolve this is by eating pizza.

[Giggles]

1311295678728024064

[igor_balis]

Where did you get the catfish? I love the stuff.

Yeah me too, i had catfish stew in budapest in 2015 and I've loved the stuf since then. Meaty white fish is just great generally though.

Went to a fishmongers in cov where i got the catfish filleted as well as some monkfish tail, which both went into a seafood jambalaya along with some king prawns :drool:

https://i.ibb.co/6Y40Zn5/20200801-142756.jpg

I fried the remaining catfish the following day along with some okra in a batter mix that included kefir and the same creole seasoning mix i put in the jambalaya:

https://i.ibb.co/ZXPr0NC/received-798606210954643.jpg

Pity it fell apart but still tasted good.

[Baz]

I bet your [mum's] house fucking stinks after cooking all that.

[Don]

What's the inclusion of the square brackets there about? Is it just pure unadulterated toxicity or does it hold some value I'm missing.

[igor_balis]

Yes my house stunk of the delicious food i cooked? I never understood that line of thinking. Oh no i ate garlic now i will smell of garlic, yeah but garlic is good, chillax.

[Baz]

What's the inclusion of the square brackets there about? Is it just pure unadulterated toxicity or does it hold some value I'm missing.I don’t know if he’s on his own in Norwich or back with his mum in Rugby.

[Spikey M]

Yes my house stunk of the delicious food i cooked? I never understood that line of thinking. Oh no i ate garlic now i will smell of garlic, yeah but garlic is good, chillax.

Not when your breath stinks of it.

[Don]

It's white man problems. Linda and Steve are too scared of smelling like ethnics to allow anything to get in the way of their beige evening meals.

[Disco]

If only there were some sort of aperture one could open to allow cooking odours to escape and let fresh air in.

[Giggles]

It's white man problems. Linda and Steve are too scared of smelling like ethnics to allow anything to get in the way of their beige evening meals.

In fairness, who'd want to smell like an ethnic?

[Ian]

If only there were some sort of aperture one could open to allow cooking odours to escape and let fresh air in.

"Today, Dragons, I'm looking for £500,000 for a 2% share in my kitchen invention - the Pong-Hole."

[Disco]

I give my Pong Hole freely as a gift to society.

[Ian]

Classic Disco.

[Dark Soldier]

Yes lads salt and pepper box. Chicken strips, chicken balls, ribs, chips, wings, samosas, spring rolls, rice, sweet and sour chicken, curry sauce and sweet and sour sauce. Not pictured is a jumbo sausage too.

https://i.imgur.com/2UkYqtv.jpg

[Giggles]

:happycry: it’s beautiful.

[Dark Soldier]

Feel like king of shit mountain now

[Ian]

Did you cane that yourself?

[Don]

Clubs are closed because cunts like you are paying money for that. Fuck me.

[Giggles]

If that’s the reason then he’s doing society a service.

[Kikó]

Not pictured is a jumbo sausage too.



Thank God. No porn please

[Dark Soldier]

Did you cane that yourself?

Nah man me and the missus

[Dark Soldier]

Clubs are closed because cunts like you are paying money for that. Fuck me.

Also who's this cunt

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Also who's this cunt

Taz.

[Dark Soldier]

Cheers, the posts make sense now.

[Luca]

The next-day flatulence from that must be off the charts bad.

[Spikey M]

Yes lads salt and pepper box. Chicken strips, chicken balls, ribs, chips, wings, samosas, spring rolls, rice, sweet and sour chicken, curry sauce and sweet and sour sauce. Not pictured is a jumbo sausage too.

https://i.imgur.com/2UkYqtv.jpg

Oh my :drool:

[mugbull]

That looks like nothing recognizable on the left, and soggy fries (with carrots?) on the right

[Jimmy Floyd]

Grated cheese I would have thought, but nothing is off the table when it comes to northern takeaway meltdowns.

[Spikey M]

It's the carrot and onion from the salt and pepper fried chicken. You can get it from a Chinese down here, albeit chilli instead of pepper and you'd have to add the chips yourself.

[Ian]

You don't carrot on our similar items. Peppers, onions, chopped up chillies if you're getting some salt and chilli-ish like that.

[Spikey M]

It's been years since I had it, so I may be wrong. That said they put carrot in the crispy beef so I'm assuming I'm not. Maybe our local is part of the same mentalist chain.

[Don]

I feel like shit staring at it in the morning nevermind what that does to you after consuming it.

[Spikey M]

You eat brain fella.

[Dark Soldier]

I feel like shit staring at it in the morning nevermind what that does to you after consuming it.

Absolute state of ya lad

[Don]

Natural nutritious brain :drool:

[Dark Soldier]

It's the carrot and onion from the salt and pepper fried chicken. You can get it from a Chinese down here, albeit chilli instead of pepper and you'd have to add the chips yourself.

yes bruv, carrot, onion and some form of indistinguishable spice

[niko_cee]

Saw some cooking 'hack' thing the other day about using bicarb of soda when making roast potatoes and fuck me it's a game changer. Best roasties ever.

[Giggles]

I have that in the homebrew supply so I’ll try it. Is it just using it in place of the normal flour or some other way?

[Smjffy]

Saw some cooking 'hack' thing the other day about using bicarb of soda when making roast potatoes and fuck me it's a game changer. Best roasties ever.

Rosemary, thyme, garlic powder, onion powder and bicarb = crispy godness.

[Jimmy Floyd]

The best roast potatoes I've done are when I put them in a pan under a roasting chicken (on a griddle) and let the chicken juices drip onto them. Coudln't repeat it if I tried but I'm sure it must be a thing.

[Spikey M]

It is. I've not tried it but have always wanted to. Might give it a go for Christmas this year actually.

[Raoul Duke]

My missus does that with ours when we have them. Can very much recommend

[randomlegend]

Saw some cooking 'hack' thing the other day about using bicarb of soda when making roast potatoes and fuck me it's a game changer. Best roasties ever.

Yeah the serious eats ones use bicarb. It breaks down the outside of the potatoes into like a slurry which then goes super crispy. Works really well.

[Spikey M]

Slurry :D

If the Dr thing doesn't work out, don't go into sales.

[Ian]

I saw the exact same word used when I googled the bicarb roasties thing earlier and did think it's not an appetising word to be using.

[Shindig]

Potato slurry is just shit mash, right?

[niko_cee]

I have that in the homebrew supply so I’ll try it. Is it just using it in place of the normal flour or some other way?

I've seen different ways, but the way I tried was just putting the bicarb in the water you par-boil the potatoes in. It breaks down the edges more effectively than heat (so you don't have to cook them too long to be fluffable) - they actually come out with a decent rough edge even if you don't shake them a bit.

[randomlegend]

I have that in the homebrew supply so I’ll try it. Is it just using it in place of the normal flour or some other way?

https://www.seriouseats.com/recipes/2016/12/the-best-roast-potatoes-ever-recipe.html

[Spikey M]

I've heard good things about brushing them with Marmite, but never tried it. Has anyone here given it a go?

[Offshore Toon]

Marmite roasties were v nice, but I like it with pretty much anything.

Marmite with onion and garlic dip on toast is the best I've found.

[Lewis]

Have you tried cheese on toast with Marmite under the cheese? It's a good pizza accompaniment as well. Just little specks of it on the pieces/crusts. I'm convinced the people who dislike/HATE it only do so because they spread it on like butter and obviously can't hack it.

[Offshore Toon]

It definitely works with anything cheese or tomato based. The chocolate was shit, but it served it's function as a marketing gimmick. I also believe anybody who waited for the marmite and peanut butter jars to try marmite and peanut butter isn't a true fan and should switch to Bovril.

[Giggles]

I do that with brown sauce.

[Raoul Duke]

Marmite on pasta with cheddar is a great, simple filler

[mugbull]

Potatoes roasted in duck fat :drool:

[Disco]

Proper fat or lard then rough up the outsides with a fork to make them extra crispy. Sounds like the bicarb does a similar thing.

[Luca]

Marmite on pasta with cheddar is a great, simple filler

You fucking WHAT mate.

[Offshore Toon]

It is good, especially when you cook the pasta in Marmite-infused water.

[Don]

But they'll jump on a man eating a part of the sheep that isn't to be found in their nearest franchise restaurant. Fucking white people, man.

[Shindig]

We're just saying it's not worth the CJD risk, fam.

[Don]

Listen, brav, fucking cheddar cheese has a higher death count let alone that thing DS posted. We're all out here taking the knee so that you people learn to concede defeat when you're wrong, come on man.

[Offshore Toon]

Just out of curiosity, how come you switched from preaching plant-based to eat sheep brain?

[Spikey M]

Because they're both contrarian positions and that's the most important thing in anything Taz does.

[Giggles]

And using a massively convoluted way to tell us.

[Don]

Calm down lads, fucking hell, you can all have a nice turn on my piece.

On the topic of promoting reduction of meat consumption, the sheep brain was a novelty meal. I'm not a veggie but all of you should still reduce your meat intake (mine excluded).

[Spikey M]

It's a good job that wasn't contrarian and convoluted or you'd be looking pretty silly right now.

[Don]

Keep calm and post about your beans on toast.

[niko_cee]

On the subject of plant based diets, and in a rather lol turn up for the books, my wife who is a vegetarian of some 20+ years standing is giving serious consideration to trying to eat fish as the drive towards veganism has basically ruined all non-meat meal options when eating out. Don't think it's going to work out though so it's pumpkin dumplings and winter vegetable stew or vegan mozzarella, lentil and spinach moneybags on ratatouille all the way for her.

[Disco]

Why only fish?

[Spikey M]

It's always fish with these weirdo's.

[Don]

Yeah, tell the bitch to get some carcinogenic meat down her and be normal.

[Disco]

I just like the idea of there being moral grounds 'vegetarians' who eat fish because they have something against them or don't consider them proper animals. Fuck Fish Veggies if you will, sort of like how actual fishing isn't stigmatised anywhere near as much as shooting or veal or whatever.

[-james-]

The less of a consciousness something has, the less guilty I feel about eating it. I don't eat pig but anchovies are fair game. You may not poke any holes in my clearly flawless logic.

[Boydy]

On the subject of plant based diets, and in a rather lol turn up for the books, my wife who is a vegetarian of some 20+ years standing is giving serious consideration to trying to eat fish as the drive towards veganism has basically ruined all non-meat meal options when eating out. Don't think it's going to work out though so it's pumpkin dumplings and winter vegetable stew or vegan mozzarella, lentil and spinach moneybags on ratatouille all the way for her.
If anything the drive towards veganism has improved veggie options.

[Offshore Toon]

All people eat animals they don't give a shit about. Call yourself what you want, but ultimately that's what it is. Fish are undeniably crap animals so pesc is probably the best diet about.

[Baz]

I’d eat cat if it was nice, and I love cats.

[Spikey M]

The less of a consciousness something has, the less guilty I feel about eating it. I don't eat pig but anchovies are fair game. You may not poke any holes in my clearly flawless logic.

Just stick to the Bony-eared Assfish.

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fish_intelligence


According to Culum Brown from Macquarie University, "Fish are more intelligent than they appear. In many areas, such as memory, their cognitive powers match or exceed those of ‘higher’ vertebrates including non-human primates."[2]

Fish hold records for the relative brain weights of vertebrates. Most vertebrate species have similar brain-to-body mass ratios. The deep sea bathypelagic bony-eared assfish,[3] has the smallest ratio of all known vertebrates.[4] At the other extreme, the electrogenic elephantnose fish, an African freshwater fish, has one of the largest brain-to-body weight ratios of all known vertebrates (slightly higher than humans) and the highest brain-to-body oxygen consumption ratio of all known vertebrates (three times that for humans).[5

[Offshore Toon]

You wouldn't kill something you love for a meal.

[niko_cee]

If anything the drive towards veganism has improved veggie options.

It really hasn't. Most places have just replaced the veggie option with a vegan one, badly, and the holocaust of cheese-based things is a real tragedy for the non-meat folk.

She's not an ethical choice veggie, she went fish because the place she's going to with the above vegan options had a much nicer sounding thing with sea bream (hence the trying it).

[niko_cee]

That's probably a bit unfair. There are more choices now, just most of them are a bit crap.

I liken it to the feminists who have become exasperated with the transsexuals ostensibly hijacking their decades long quest for mainstream acceptance/equal treatment. Non-ethical/non-preachy vegetarianism stood on the cusp of broad acceptance, and then along came the vegans to fuck it up for them/render their plight meaningless.

[Boydy]

It really hasn't. Most places have just replaced the veggie option with a vegan one, badly, and the holocaust of cheese-based things is a real tragedy for the non-meat folk.

She's not an ethical choice veggie, she went fish because the place she's going to with the above vegan options had a much nicer sounding thing with sea bream (hence the trying it).

Maybe Jersey restaurants are just crap.

Or Guernsey or wherever.

[niko_cee]

Jersey's restaurants are really good actually.

Not that I'm from there. :moop:

It's not purely a locally observed phenomenon. I understand the effort being made, but the explosion in plant-based/vegan eating hasn't actually had the overwhelmingly positive impact you would think it might for plain old veggies. Personally I don't give a fuck, but I can sympathise.

[Offshore Toon]

Jersey and Guernsey may be lacking in many departments, but restaurants certainly isn't one of them.

[Lewis]

I could be a vegetarian if I had to be. Veganism just seems like an unnecessary ballache when I already recycle for no real benefit.

[Giggles]

Vegetarian is definitely doable if you took the notion and weren’t a twat to everyone about it. Vegan is just a dead loss and should be banned.

[Lewis]

You could live on egg and chips, and you've still got all the sweet stuff (I can afford to ditch jelly).

[niko_cee]

I once went on a banking jolly (to see local lad done good Andy Priaulx racing) where I met a guy who had decided to be a veggie in his 60s and he literally only ate chips and deep fried mushrooms. It was beyond baffling.

[niko_cee]

Can confirm the potato slurry bicarb thing makes awesome chips as well.

*ponce food photo alert*

https://lh3.googleusercontent.com/g7tzzN_YLZj0R6GA7_h5TeSbaAh5MTW1F_AAkNZB30rH8FsfDd kS0Zi6v-wgZN-otUR5VvtBpjXrCFyoykOFTN0RkTlqhpHyAvIm8kgHxddLnD-eoeWr-PwKjxgItX2T-iUfKYjJphR5ecl1QLAjVqRX5bA_bDCSCFdWd2VUc7k5v-04lcYEcWU0netJOTUqkn6IcZXw4emI8L0XoxJnwDDEmmE8cNa1 g1nL-SspR7i9VLXgf-RBexN78qKdf9qBe3Yq0zBTfQlpPql18Y9rlPJW0jPFjNkx3DGt gq76GycjUhGH-ob-ggMJiru280xP8irO9iHARjXgY2x6rw0CrosU4T1dpEckgykEKn FshnAwIs2XtMClGZgnERhGCK_6dboHn3G0fJvRQdGZTO-UVEnqcTtjFIgQxzn-d8sTItnHZFrCQk7fMO-g2VSJKrsL9NqmmjH4IWmSh21Acp_cY_tamwzWQMgnadAo6NFMY _zOUaDGwocYmtfu9o88yze0B3lMENVOzWMRFo_AqPzVjZuT0dI j4WqMge_ZwhsAMapVAtXqCEDbd7sM_83DuHq7YwUXGT90VSvXI kBW9KrzJe33lZne5m305vgOle8pVJYbMA410PxW3V1iBNQCYN3 CRQ-8jILyHp7MDiW3k24L-CeolZvynyYXkbNmDZp_9D48GIDNvii-iQJ_Vw71aA=w678-h903-no?authuser=0

[Giggles]

They look serious :drool:

[Giggles]

How long did you boil them for?

[Spikey M]

I'm trying this today too. On the boil as we speak.

[niko_cee]

Got the water boiling with the bicarb in it and stuck the chips in for more than 5 but less than 10 minutes, I think. They were decent sized potatoes cut into eighths. I've tried it with various sizes but the chips need to be substantial to get the benefit.

[Kikó]

Image doesn't work for me :(

[Spikey M]

Me neither, but I presumed just because I'm on my phone.

[Disco]

The link doesn't take you anywhere either.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Me neither, but I presumed just because I'm on my phone.

Doesn't work on my phone or PC.

[Giggles]

Nikos one? Or has someone else posted one?

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Niko's.

[Spikey M]

https://i.ibb.co/4gvw4ZB/20201011-140145.jpg

Could have done with another 10 minutes, but whinging kids necessitated an early dish up.

Can't say we noticed too much of a difference to normal ones hat have been shaken up in the pan before going in the oven.

[Kikó]

Woof, they're brilliant.

[niko_cee]

It was a google photo link. I always find them a bit temperamental. Those roasties look good. Maybe you just always do good ones?

https://photos.app.goo.gl/HsqKi8qnB1ypsbBA9

https://photos.app.goo.gl/HsqKi8qnB1ypsbBA9

[Spikey M]

I do make a good roast, was just expecting more of a crunch. They're was a bit of a difference, but I'm not sure I'd have noticed it if I didn't know.

Those chips look good, but they're giving me scale issues. At first I thought you were eating off a sandwich plate with a microscopic glass of red.

[phonics]

I missed the first part of that discussion and thought Niko was accusing Spikey of passing off a google photo as his own roasties. Thought it was about to descend into madness.