The All New, All Shit, Relationship Thread

[Magic]

:drool:

[Magic]

I just remembered something really shit we did when we moved in together after 6 months. You know on shit films where a couple has died or gone missing early on, and it always pans in their house with someone leaving a message on their answering machine and it's a really corny, lovely joint message with them laughing and it's obvious how much they love each other blah blah blah.

We did that, but it wasn't a genuine one off attempt, it took us a fair while. :D

What great times they were.

[SvN]

An answerphone? Have you been together since the 80s?

[wullie]

Closest I've done is add her as a second user on Netflix.

[Kikó]

I've got a Two Together Railcard. That was a big step.

[Magic]

An answerphone? Have you been together since the 80s?

Voicemail then, you cunt.

[SvN]

Do you share a mobile phone?

[Boydy]

I bet they share an email address.

[igor_balis]

I know a few couples with shared facebook accounts.

[phonics]

I know a couple where one doesn't care for social media so she took on the mantle and has created a fake Facebook account where she posts as him. She does the same for the dog.

[igor_balis]

Facebook accounts for pets is the absolute nadir of modern society. Well, except for that fucking fake twitter page for the Queen. Die.

[John]

She sounds too mental to be in an adult relationship, Phonics. That's the behaviour of someone who'll strangle a family one day.

People who create Facebook pages for pets are the same people who write the dog's name in Christmas cards. Wankers, in short.

[igor_balis]

My uncle signs his Christmas cards from him and his cats but he's a lovely weirdo rather than a wanker. He also calls me 'sambo' as an affectionate nickname. I don't have the heart to tell him to stop.

[Baz]

Facebook accounts for pets is the absolute nadir of modern society. Well, except for that fucking fake twitter page for the Queen. Die.
The Premier Inn I stayed in five years ago off the M6 remains the absolute nadir of my working career thus far.
:sherlock:

[Disco]

I think we've reached peak nadir.

[Baz]

NADIR OF THE BOARD imminent.

[igor_balis]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fJkt8UT8O8s

??

[Magic]

And there it is.

[GS]

:sherlock:

He should be commended on using the board as an opportunity for learning and advancement. The rest of you take note.

[SincereTheRebel]

The women who claims she knows nothing, knows everything.

[Spoonsky]

http://www.nytimes.com/2016/05/29/opinion/sunday/why-you-will-marry-the-wrong-person.html?action=click&contentCollection=T%20Magazine&module=Trending&version=Full&region=Marginalia&pgtype=article

Baz wullie Kikó

[wullie]

There's my speech covered.

[Spoonsky]

I made out with my friend's ex-girlfriend the other night and it looks like we're going to go out over the summer. Good times.

[Pepe]

How many bases?

[Shindig]

Her tongue's probably been up your mate's arse, Spoon.

[Spoonsky]

And mine's been up your sister's, what's it to you?

[Boydy]

And mine's been up your sister's, what's it to you?

:lol:

[Manc]

Girl must have a golden vagina.

[Kikó]

Mormon gone rogue :cool:

[Byron]

Bitchslapped by the 7 year old, how the mighty have fallen.

[Bartholomert]

I made out with my friend's ex-girlfriend the other night and it looks like we're going to go out over the summer. Good times.

That's fucked up and a desperate mans move. I hope he's not a close friend because he will never forgive you.

Regardless, it is urgently necessary for the psyche of a young male to get laid before going to college and develop some experience. So good for you.

[simon]

Spoon. :cool:

[The Merse]

The romance shines through when you mention wanting to 'smash her' for sure.

[Foe]

You're heading towards the wrong type of 3-way Spoon.

[Spoonsky]

That's fucked up and a desperate mans move. I hope he's not a close friend because he will never forgive you.

Regardless, it is urgently necessary for the psyche of a young male to get laid before going to college and develop some experience. So good for you.

For a while I've been as good friends with her as I am with him. He's started hooking up with someone else. He doesn't own her, and whether he forgives me or not is up to him. We're all going to college soon and he's not one of my best friends so it'll be ok, though I am trying to figure out how to tell him.

[Foe]

For a while I've been as good friends with her as I am with him. He's started hooking up with someone else. He doesn't own her, and whether he forgives me or not is up to him. We're all going to college soon and he's not one of my best friends so it'll be ok, though I am trying to figure out how to tell him.

It's a bit of dick move so do it somewhere he can't take a swing at you.

[Lewis]

We've got his back. Who has this other dickhead got?

[Manc]

Snapchat him while you're inside.

[Bartholomert]

For a while I've been as good friends with her as I am with him. He's started hooking up with someone else. He doesn't own her, and whether he forgives me or not is up to him. We're all going to college soon and he's not one of my best friends so it'll be ok, though I am trying to figure out how to tell him.

No he doesn't own her, but it's a scum bag slut move on her part (lol if you think she isn't doing it at least partially to get back at him) and an incredibly shitty opportunistic move on your part. It shows that you are unable to get with other girls and you will settle for another mans sloppy seconds; don't think she doesn't see that and factor that into how attracted she is to you. That she acquiesces to all of this should serve as a warning as to how loyal she will be in the future to you; any girl who participates in that sort of behavior is absolutely not worth any sort of emotional or long-term investment. She will 100% monkey branch to the next better guy who comes along.

But again, you need to get laid to be less shitty. So go ahead and practice. Be under no illusions as to what's happening though.

[Baz]

My mate is married to someone who another mate fingered (maybe even "licked out" and got a blowy) on holiday, and then shagged a couple times after the holiday.

It's just wrong.

[Magic]

An ex-colleague got married to a bloke who's brother she'd shagged in a local park after a night out on the piss. Madness.

[Bartholomert]

Even Betas eventually get married once girls in their age group become desperate enough. That's why we have a 50-60% divorce rate for when those girls get bored and can't readjust to monogomy or tolerate the boredom of a committed relationship with someone unsatisfying (after a lifetime of being sexual used by higher status males).

[Magic]

Mert is so insecure he'll never be happy. This pleases me.

[Lewis]

What exactly makes somebody an 'alpha'?

[Magic]

Mert is definitely an alphat.

:harold:

[Raoul Duke]

A Tom Selleck 'tache

[Pepe]

What exactly makes somebody an 'alpha'?

Puffed chest.

[Bartholomert]

What exactly makes somebody an 'alpha'?

Going through life in a dignified, self-sufficient fashion while being attractive enough to women that you are never without their company (if desired) for an extended period of time.

[Spikey M]

What exactly makes somebody an 'alpha'?

A 'snapback' and an Instagram account.

[Bartholomert]

A 'snapback' and an Instagram account.

That's the opposite of an alpha. Excessive social media presence / snapbacks are severely frowned upon as the domain of loser tryhard liberals / trashy low class people / minorities (like Iranians/Asians) imitating what they wrongly perceive to be as cool / high status.

[Pepe]

Going through life in a dignified, self-sufficient fashion while being attractive enough to women that you are never without their company (if desired) for an extended period of time.

So, be employed? That's easier than I thought.

Sorry Lewis. :eyemouth:

[Bartholomert]

So, be employed? That's easier than I thought.

Sorry Lewis. :eyemouth:

Dignified is tougher for the modern male than you would think. But in general it's not that hard, just "don't be a pussy and take care of your responsibilities" would be adequate really.

[Pepe]

How long have you been self-sufficient?

[Pen]

:D

[Bartholomert]

How long have you been self-sufficient?

Who said I considered myself alpha? It's an ideal to strive for, hence my current educational / career trajectory.

[Magic]

Alpha = cunt?

[Lewis]

So, be employed? That's easier than I thought.

Sorry Lewis. :eyemouth:

This is why I asked. I need to know where I stand.

[Spoonsky]

No he doesn't own her, but it's a scum bag slut move on her part (lol if you think she isn't doing it at least partially to get back at him) and an incredibly shitty opportunistic move on your part. It shows that you are unable to get with other girls and you will settle for another mans sloppy seconds; don't think she doesn't see that and factor that into how attracted she is to you. That she acquiesces to all of this should serve as a warning as to how loyal she will be in the future to you; any girl who participates in that sort of behavior is absolutely not worth any sort of emotional or long-term investment. She will 100% monkey branch to the next better guy who comes along.

But again, you need to get laid to be less shitty. So go ahead and practice. Be under no illusions as to what's happening though.

I take this seriously but I'm afraid you just don't understand the situation at all. It's much more of an emotional thing than a sexual thing, although that bit doesn't hurt. If anything I'm the one who's likely to drunkenly fuck up and try to get with someone else, she's just too shy.

[Spoonsky]

Also loyalty isn't really a factor because it's only over the summer. That's the good thing is that there really isn't much of a long-term investment.

[phonics]

That's the opposite of an alpha. Excessive social media presence / snapbacks are severely frowned upon as the domain of loser tryhard liberals / trashy low class people / minorities (like Iranians/Asians)

http://cdn.inquisitr.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/12/Donald-Trump-with-hat-thumbs-up-Jan-Kruger-GettyImages-482327612.jpg

[7om]

In my pursuit of enlightenment and trying to understand the ways and lives of 'alphas', I stumbled across a new category: beta orbiters.

What is your experience of them Mert and do we have any on this board?

[Magic]

Isn't that just a hipster name for typical friend zoned guys?

[7om]

Never mind, Mert. I've got one hook, line and sinker.

[igor_balis]

i was given some beta blockers when i was 16 for some anxiety issues are they like that

[Magic]

Lol @ insinuating you can be friend zoned if you're already married. We are the bottom of sex line, seven. Let's admit it.

[Bartholomert]

I take this seriously but I'm afraid you just don't understand the situation at all. It's much more of an emotional thing than a sexual thing, although that bit doesn't hurt. If anything I'm the one who's likely to drunkenly fuck up and try to get with someone else, she's just too shy.

No she's not. Don't be naive.

[Bartholomert]

In my pursuit of enlightenment and trying to understand the ways and lives of 'alphas', I stumbled across a new category: beta orbiters.

What is your experience of them Mert and do we have any on this board?


Isn't that just a hipster name for typical friend zoned guys?


Never mind, Mert. I've got one hook, line and sinker.

We gucci? It's the guy's who hang around on the periphery of girls acting as subservient cuck emotional punching bags whenever she doesn't have anyone else to give her attention, in the hopes that one day the girl will realize what a great guy he is and decide to date him (spoiler: it never happens).

[7om]

Lol @ insinuating you can be friend zoned if you're already married. We are the bottom of sex line, seven. Let's admit it.

:drool:

Beta cuck.

[Magic]

I'd kill to be a beta.

[7om]

We gucci? It's the guy's who hang around on the periphery of girls acting as subservient cuck emotional punching bags whenever she doesn't have anyone else to give her attention, in the hopes that one day the girl will realize what a great guy he is and decide to date him (spoiler: it never happens).

https://www.reddit.com/r/TheRedPill/

[Lewis]

These new layers aren't helping my quest for clarity.

[Pepe]

Nowadays you can identify as whatever you want mate.

[Lewis]

I'll be an alpha then. Sorted.

[Magic]

These new layers aren't helping my quest for clarity.

It's like an onion of cuntery.

[Spoonsky]

It's a bit of dick move so do it somewhere he can't take a swing at you.

Probably would've been better if he'd chinned me and got on with it. Instead it turns out that their breakup was worse than I realized and he said that he'd have a hard time interacting with me if I went out with her, which would probably fuck up things with our larger friend group, so it looks like a no-go, or at least will require some stealth ops instead of a ground invasion. Oh well.

[Magic]

Did you ask him? Fuck sake.

[Pepe]

Just get on with it. Everything is big drama in high school and everything will be forgotten come the fall.

[Bartholomert]

Probably would've been better if he'd chinned me and got on with it. Instead it turns out that their breakup was worse than I realized and he said that he'd have a hard time interacting with me if I went out with her, which would probably fuck up things with our larger friend group, so it looks like a no-go, or at least will require some stealth ops instead of a ground invasion. Oh well.

Told you so.

Let me guess, girl was completely misleading about how their relationship ended?

[Spikey M]

When did Spoon turn in to Mert lite?

[Lofty]

'Don't shit on your own doorstep' is decent advice.

I'm popping the question this month.

[Pepe]

Shiiii. :drool:

How tall is she?

[Lofty]

6'2" :)

[Manc]

Went on my first date since the split last night. All felt very alien. We've made plans to meet up later in the month.

[Magic]

Just came across...ok I went to great lengths to find (lol) a girl I was absolutely besotted with (probably friend zoned) in my late teens. She was incredible then and she looks even better now. It was her personality though, she had a proper crip brother which made her not a cunt for her looks, really down to earth, had a really cool older sister and her brother (non-crip) was sound too.

Man I loved her.

Come on Mert, I'll have that beta ripping now.

p.s she doesn't have Facebook, I couldn't remember her second name either. I managed to find her sister who was called Roxy and then her mum who had a completely different handle to her name, and then there was pictures of my love. She obviously doesn't have Facebook as there was no tagging or mentioning etc when the other sister was. Can't find her on Twitter, or Insta either. She's a myth. I love her even more now.

[Boydy]

Find her. It's meant to be.

[GS]

How much have you had to drink this evening and how many nights have you spent in the spare room already?

[Lewis]

I think 'she had a proper crip brother which made her not a cunt for her looks' is the most romantic thing I've ever read.

[Magic]

I've had one pint and I'm sitting in a fucking shit hotel room with David fucking Dimbleby on the telly. No wonder I'm lost. Though I've often thought about her. She really was special, man. Fuck. Also thinking about times with my band. Pretty sad how it's all turned out. I literally have no friends.

[Magic]

I think 'she had a proper crip brother which made her not a cunt for her looks' is the most romantic thing I've ever read.

Would have been in the groom's speech.

:cry:

[Boydy]

You were wanking over those pictures, weren't you?

[Byron]

I thought we'd long established that Magic will wank over anything with a pulse.

[Magic]

You were wanking over those pictures, weren't you?

Not at all. She wasn't like that. Have too much respect to just crack one out. This is the level she's at, lads.

edit: fuck legions of seagulls are making an orgy of noise outside my window now. Fuck my life.

[Magic]

I remember taking her home after we went to meet her sister as she was a barrista at a local coffee shop, we talked about Lynyrd Skynyrd. It was one of the greatest moments of my life.

Jesus I sound like Spoon.

[Magic]

Now I ask my wife about Lynyrd Skynyrd she'd probably think it was a new series out or something and when she found out she'd probably think I was a pretentious wanker for not liking THE TOP 40.

[Magic]

Don't do it Manc, she'll probably turn out to be a worthless whore. Ditch her now whilst you can.

[Lewis]

Now I ask my wife about Lynyrd Skynyrd she'd probably think it was a new series out or something and when she found out she'd probably think I was a pretentious wanker for not liking THE TOP 40.

Or quote Tuesday's Gone at you.

[John]

I thought we'd long established that Magic will wank over anything with a pulse.

Particularly if that pulse comes to an end at some point in the video.

[Magic]

Mock me all you like. I don't care, I've hit rock bottom. I've actually started adding porn stars on my SnapChat account. Fuck you all.

[GS]

Just get the divorce organised and prepare your pitch to the custody officer as to why you should be allowed five hours' access a week and not two.

[Magic]

GS at least I've had sex, mate.

[Pepe]

:lol:

[Boydy]

Why did you get married, Magic?

It doesn't sound like you and your wife have all that much in common.

[Magic]

Why did you get married, Magic?

It doesn't sound like you and your wife have all that much in common.

That's not strictly true, I just have a disgusting habit of always thinking grass is greener, never satisfied, better than etc. I don't know why. The opposite is probably true.

[Magic]

Can I just say this place has definitely changed me, you set of cunts. I used to be satisfied with CSI, James Paterson, working in a warehouse and McDonalds.

[Manc]

Pics or gtfo.

[GS]

Petty insults aside, you appear to be staying in the marital home solely because of the kids.

You're never going to be happy.

[Magic]

I also had a lot of friends but lost them, openly ditching them to be fair, for the mrs. I pushed them out because I didn't want them to ruin anything. They weren't GREAT or anything but at least they were there. My best mate she really didn't like, I think the last straw there was when I didn't pick him for my best man and picked my brother-in-law who I'd only known for about 3 years lol. He didn't come to the wedding. Lot of them weren't even invited but those that were didn't come. Haven't really had the opportunity to make friends like that since, this was all before Facebook was big and stuff, like Bebo times. So I started Facebook after all that, which fucked me over a little bit. I still have work friends but that isn't the same, really. Feel quite sad when I see people that have great mates outside of work, BM4L or groups of mates. I threw it all away, but they weren't the right ones anyway I don't believe at least. Who knows. Who gives a fuck anyway, what a boring cunt.

[Magic]

Petty insults aside, you appear to be staying in the marital home solely because of the kids.

You're never going to be happy.

I'm not not happy. Melancholy with patches of hate, and streaks of greatness.

[Pepe]

He'll never be happy, marriage or not.

[Magic]

He'll never be happy, marriage or not.

Yeah, this is an excellent point. Not sure why, maybe I need CBT or some shit. Fucking wonderful, thanks shit parents.

[Pepe]

Have you considered meditation?

[Magic]

Have you considered meditation?

No.

[Boydy]

Try it.

[Pepe]

Good, it's a con.

[GS]

Fuck meditation. Try medication.

[Magic]

I need to find inner peace, and accept myself. Once I do that, I can accept and be happy with everything else. Problem is I'm all too aware of how much of a cunt I am and can be, so its a viscous cycle. Maybe it's good to be oblivious.

[Boydy]

Making friends as an adult is kinda weird and difficult.

[Lewis]

Maybe for you lot.

[GS]

I need to find inner peace, and accept myself. Once I do that, I can accept and be happy with everything else. Problem is I'm all too aware of how much of a cunt I am and can be, so its a viscous cycle. Maybe it's good to be oblivious.

Try religion. It works for some of us.

[Pepe]

It is. Also a bit pointless since you no longer 'do stuff.'

Just get a hobby or something.

[GS]

Maybe for you lot.

Boyd's too busy trying to fit in with the GAA banter.

[Boydy]

I need to find inner peace, and accept myself. Once I do that, I can accept and be happy with everything else. Problem is I'm all too aware of how much of a cunt I am and can be, so its a viscous cycle. Maybe it's good to be oblivious.

Seriously, give meditation a go.

You seem to have a constant stream of negative thoughts about yourself and even just 20 minutes a day free from that will make you feel a lot better.

[Shindig]

"Sorry, Amber. Daddy can't play with you because he's trying to imagine an Ox scratching it's arse."

[Pleb]

:D

[Chrissy]

Hilarity aside, if this is real then you poor bastard Magic. Hope it all gets sorted out for you dude.

[igor_balis]

:( :hug:

That sounds properly shit, Magic. Maybe you need to get a divorce and go mad for a few years, have a second crack at being a teenager. Move to the midlands and sleep in my spare room, I'll introduce you to my freaky friends.

[Sam]

I also had a lot of friends but lost them, openly ditching them to be fair, for the mrs. I pushed them out because I didn't want them to ruin anything. They weren't GREAT or anything but at least they were there. My best mate she really didn't like, I think the last straw there was when I didn't pick him for my best man and picked my brother-in-law who I'd only known for about 3 years lol. He didn't come to the wedding. Lot of them weren't even invited but those that were didn't come. Haven't really had the opportunity to make friends like that since, this was all before Facebook was big and stuff, like Bebo times. So I started Facebook after all that, which fucked me over a little bit. I still have work friends but that isn't the same, really. Feel quite sad when I see people that have great mates outside of work, BM4L or groups of mates. I threw it all away, but they weren't the right ones anyway I don't believe at least. Who knows. Who gives a fuck anyway, what a boring cunt.

I had an extremely good friend who did similar, I've not spoken to him in years and have no intention ever to do so. Kinda screwed yourself over in terms of friendships there.

[Chrissy]

Magic I did similar with my ex wife, r.e. friends. I then reached out to them afterwards and was very honest and humble about how much of a dick I was.

Some welcomed me back into their lives, some didn't. Get out and about, go to comedy/music gigs, socialise at work nights out etc. I had to start out again in 2010 with pretty much fuck all pals in my life. Joined a 5's team and started going to a pub quiz. Still do both weekly. Morale of this pish is get out and engage with folk.

[Manc]

Found out today the ex has been tarnishing my name by telling everyone I cheated on her. Chimping out!

[Lewis]

Play along with it so it messes with her head when it gets back to her.

[Spoonsky]

I need to find inner peace, and accept myself. Once I do that, I can accept and be happy with everything else. Problem is I'm all too aware of how much of a cunt I am and can be, so its a viscous cycle. Maybe it's good to be oblivious.

Read the Bhagavad-Gita. Then join a book group, you lonely bastard. At least you've provided me some clarity as I try to decide whether it's worth fucking off my friends for a girl.

[Lofty]

Making friends as an adult is kinda weird and difficult.

Making friends as an adult is easy if you just join a sports team. Obviously you need at least some bantz though or you will be crucified.

[Bartholomert]

Read the Bhagavad-Gita. Then join a book group, you lonely bastard. At least you've provided me some clarity as I try to decide whether it's worth fucking off my friends for a girl.

Why don't you keep your friends and find another girl?

[Sam]

Bros before hoes, init.

[Lewis]

Leos before those.

[igor_balis]

I think it depends on how close you are to the bro, how long the relationship lasted/how serious it was and how long ago it was.

[Pepe]

Also whether you're moving to another country within a few months.

[Shindig]

I think if you or your mate thinks a lass will poison the well, it's already on shaky ground. I dunno, Magic. If it means that much, try and get back on terms with the lads. If nowt else, its another avenue to vent towards instead of just us and liveleak comment threads.

[Foe]

Having gone through it from the other end spoons it's a terrible idea. It won't just affect you and this guy, you'll potentially fuck things up with your group of friends too. If he kicks up a fuss or is genuinely upset by it then you walk away looking like a prick to everyone neutral.

What's the point?

[Manc]

The grass is greener!

[Foe]

The grass is greener!

I think it's probably more "there's grass over there!" given spoons relationship history.

[Manc]

I was referring to Magic's situation. Spoon is young and will make mistakes. Let him.

[Spoonsky]

Having gone through it from the other end spoons it's a terrible idea. It won't just affect you and this guy, you'll potentially fuck things up with your group of friends too. If he kicks up a fuss or is genuinely upset by it then you walk away looking like a prick to everyone neutral.

What's the point?

Well, I would hate for my friend to end up like you.

:eyemouth:

[Manc]

Failed to pull last night and now can't even get hungover tings to come round. Woeful.

[Bartholomert]

Important article about the emotionally damaging effects of the hookup culture on women:

http://www.crisismagazine.com/2016/hook-culture-done-women

[phonics]

I started reading it and I thought 'This is a weird article' and then I looked up

https://i.imgur.com/R7Jsd9M.png

You don't half read some weirdo websites Mert.

edit: Just got this popup as I went to close the tab

https://i.imgur.com/G6Axjq3.png

Nah, I'm good mate.

[niko_cee]

I got the same one (and did pretty much the same thing as you as regards reading it).

:D

There was a documentary about Fraternities on BBC last night. Dear lord.

[phonics]

There was a documentary about Fraternities on BBC last night. Dear lord.

That was so depressing I had to turn off.

[niko_cee]

I only saw the last 20 minutes of it. Is it because they go to college younger (or have less primary/secondary education) which makes young American men even more ostensibly infantile than their British counterparts? It really is quite an achievement.

[Bartholomert]

Yo being in a fraternity is dope, you pool all your money with your best friends to throw parties and bang wimmins. How can you not be a fan of that?

[wullie]

If there was some way to have friends, parties and girls without the ritual humiliation and sexual abuse we'd have formed a utopian society at last.

[Bartholomert]

If there was some way to have friends, parties and girls without the ritual humiliation and sexual abuse we'd have formed a utopian society at last.

Almost of the claims frequently leveled against fraternities immediately fall apart upon any serious scrutiny. It's just the usual center-Left crowd of sexually frustrated betas and bitter girls (for not being pretty enough) trying to dismantle institutions they wish they could participate in, with a pinch of the sensationalism associated with class grievances / sexuality / exclusice secret societies.

In practice it's a bunch of apathetic degenerates throwing parties and arguing with each other about how to throw said parties. Maybe a little bit of light hazing sprinkled in for the lulz and to make sure there are people to set up before and clean up after the parties.

[wullie]

How can you not be a fan of that?

[Manc]

It's been over a month since I've seen the ex face to face. :(

[Bartholomert]

It's been over a month since I've seen the ex face to face. :(

Best way to get over an ex:

1. Delete her on all forms of social media, make her impossible to contact
2. Sleep with three other women
3. Be happy

[Manc]

No 1 has been achieved. I'm working on 2 & 3.

[Shindig]

Step two seems oddly specific.

[Manc]

I thought the old adage was ten?

[Bartholomert]

One of the most comprehensive and simple articles on the glaring and unaddressed privileges of women over men in the Western world:

https://medium.com/@NikitaCcoulombe/do-women-really-want-equality-4374910f2236#.6js7y4kh8

[Magic]

:D

You fucking wrote that, didn't you? I simply cannot believe this bit:

"But the plain fact is: here in the West, we have it pretty great. In many ways better than men. And if we really took a look at men’s lives, we might realize that."

hasn't come from your little mind.

It has graphs and maps. Definitely Merterkan.

[Magic]

Lol she's nicely defending rapists too.

[Magic]

I've shared my snapchat name on Facebook. Hopefully some nice babes add me so I can bank their stories.

[Pepe]

Thus far, it appears this kind of man, often referred to as a “beta male,” turns women off.

Fuck off, mert. :D

[Shindig]

I feel we should record that post for 14 years down the line when Magic winds up luring his own kid to a park.

[Magic]

Fuck off, mert. :D

I didn't even get that far. :D

[Manc]

Still single and hung up over the ex. I've had sex with a few girls, but there proving only to be sobering experiences. You keep that marriage tight, Magic.

[Magic]

Think my child is developing anxiety (oh noes!) through perfectionism and being an only child.

She seems to procrastinate all the time now, and gives us the 'I can't do it' crap. We get upset and frustrated because we know she can do it (putting on her socks this morning) but she flat out refuses. This resulted in 3 individual meltdowns and ultimately a lot of shouting because there was a rush.

Yes we fell in to the trap of WHAT NOT TO DO.

[Dquincy]

That took me a while to be fair. Socks are a tricky one.

[Dquincy]

Still single and hung up over the ex. I've had sex with a few girls, but there proving only to be sobering experiences. You keep that marriage tight, Magic.

Why did you break up in the first place?

Are youon these dating apps? They must help...?

[Shindig]

Think my child is developing anxiety (oh noes!) through perfectionism and being an only child.

She seems to procrastinate all the time now, and gives us the 'I can't do it' crap. We get upset and frustrated because we know she can do it (putting on her socks this morning) but she flat out refuses. This resulted in 3 individual meltdowns and ultimately a lot of shouting because there was a rush.

Yes we fell in to the trap of WHAT NOT TO DO.

Does she have any role models? They all put their own socks on. They'd be nowhere without that.

[Manc]

Why did you break up in the first place?

Are youon these dating apps? They must help...?

She turned 30 and had a meltdown similar to Magic's daughter.

I've dabbled in the online dating scene. The majority just see it as a procrastination tool rather than actively pursing dates and what not. I've got numbers from it, but nothing substantial as of yet.

[SincereTheRebel]

This could easily go into the 'The little things in life that fuck you off' thread but its probably better in here.

It really irritates me when your about to stroke your girlfriend. She claims she isnt ready yet. OK, that fine. Then when she decides she is now ready. You poke it in and she says she isnt ready :panda:

[Bartholomert]

She turned 30 and had a meltdown similar to Magic's daughter.

I've dabbled in the online dating scene. The majority just see it as a procrastination tool rather than actively pursing dates and what not. I've got numbers from it, but nothing substantial as of yet.

I once banged 5 different girls over the course of 8 days using Tinder while my BMI was literally obese (30.8). Gotta up your game cuz.

[Magic]

This could easily go into the 'The little things in life that fuck you off' thread but its probably better in here.

It really irritates me when your about to stroke your girlfriend. She claims she isnt ready yet. OK, that fine. Then when she decides she is now ready. You poke it in and she says she isnt ready :panda:

None of us on here have this problem Sincy as we all have tiny white penises.

[igor_balis]

I've just had sex for the first time since 2013. :drool: / :uhoh:

[SincereTheRebel]

None of us on here have this problem Sincy as we all have tiny white penises.

It has nothing to do with that. If your not fully ready, dont let me start the grind and then im forced to pull out, stop and wait.


I've just had sex for the first time since 2013. :drool: / :uhoh:

We need more information @igor you beast :drool:

[Magic]

Your girlfriend sounds like a spastic.

[Bartholomert]

It has nothing to do with that. If your not fully ready, dont let me start the grind and then im forced to pull out, stop and wait.

We need more information @igor you beast :drool:

I just make sure to let girls know my first-year associate starting salary in the private sector and related pay scale for the future. Never had any issues.


I've just had sex for the first time since 2013. :drool: / :uhoh:

How the fuck could you live you with yourself? After 2 months dry I would cut out everything in life and live in the gym until I was aesthetic enough to bang fatties at least.

[Magic]

Lol have you not seen Igor?

[Bartholomert]

I have not in fairness.

I just can't fathom it, I would get plastic surgery and do whatever was necessary, what's the point of life if you can't 'fuk bishes' ?

[Magic]

The moment you decide to grow a massive ginger beard.

[leedsrevolution]

Lol have you not seen Igor?

Very handsome man if I'd say so myself.

[Bartholomert]

Your weekly Red Pill:


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UxpVwBzFAkw#t=17

[Magic]

Good to see since the Turkish shit has calmed down Mert has regressed to his usual, unbearable self.

[Magic]

Very handsome man if I'd say so myself.

Yes but you look like fat person with Treacher Collins syndrome.

[igor_balis]

I'm pretty shit at pulling strangers and I'm not really crazy about casual sex with randoms and being stuck in the arse-end of nowhere from which most of the smart, pretty girls have fucked off to the big city/got partners hasn't helped for more meaningful encounters. Also I think after a few months the desperation for sex turns into a sorta bleak acceptance.

[leedsrevolution]

Yes but you look like fat person with Treacher Collins syndrome.

Your just jelous because your life is awful and nobody would care if you died. :)

[Lewis]

:lol:

[Giggles]

your just jelous because your life is awful and nobody would care if you died. :)

boom.

:D

[Magic]

There we go again. More beta cuck jealousy. Now I know how Mert feels.

[Magic]

I'm pretty shit at pulling strangers and I'm not really crazy about casual sex with randoms and being stuck in the arse-end of nowhere from which most of the smart, pretty girls have fucked off to the big city/got partners hasn't helped for more meaningful encounters. Also I think after a few months the desperation for sex turns into a sorta bleak acceptance.

Should have stayed in Edinburgh mate. The tingage that's been kicking about there whist it's been warm. :drool:

[Bartholomert]

Good to see since the Turkish shit has calmed down Mert has regressed to his usual, unbearable self.

I'm just trying to save Western Civilization by spreading the Truth, cherish that shit you don't appreciate how precious it is...

[igor_balis]

Should have stayed in Edinburgh mate. The tingage that's been kicking about there whist it's been warm. :drool:

I did go on a few dates with this 30-something woman who I thought was interesting and sophisticated at first but quickly realised she was mostly just weird and terrifying. Probably could have shagged her if I persevered but I was losing my mind too much to stick it out in my Gorgie squat.

[Magic]

I did go on a few dates with this 30-something woman who I thought was interesting and sophisticated at first but quickly realised she was mostly just weird and terrifying. Probably could have shagged her if I persevered but I was losing my mind too much to stick it out in my Gorgie squat.

If it helps despite being purebred alpha I went through a four year dry spell.

[Magic]

And that was whilst I was married.

AHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

[Magic]

*loads shotgun*

[Bartholomert]

Wut are you serious?

[leedsrevolution]

I had a one year dry spell. I would have been to high to ever get it up had the chance appeared anyway.

[Magic]

That's a decent run for an alcoholic.

[leedsrevolution]

That's a decent run for an alcoholic.

See your awards mate and sit down.

[Sam]

I had a dry spell of a good year or so after my girlfriend, but that was when I decided that slaying dragons was more important than slaying pussy.

[Pepe]

I've just had sex for the first time since 2013. :drool: / :uhoh:

Wonder why you are having such a hard time.


Became the gym leader for my favourite and most frequently visited pub last night which made me shamefully proud. Team Blue had nicked it back this morning, which was particularly galling as it is someone I know who's a bit of a wanker.

Oh...

[igor_balis]

:cry:

[Manc]

Ginger beard game. Represent.

[Manc]

Just seen the ex in town for the first time in yonks. Piled on the pounds.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

She's clearly turned to food to get over you.

Or she's entering the lucrative BBW webcam market.

http://www.popdust.com/my-boyfriend-went-down-on-me-and-found-a-dead-kitten-1891094057.html

Can make some serious cash.

[Spammer]

Nothing much happening my end on the relationship front. Was seeing a lass for about 6 weeks but we established after about 3 that it wasn't going anywhere. Enjoyed chilling out though so just carried on, and then she met someone she actually liked and felt guilty about seeing me at the same time so binned me off.

[Bartholomert]

Down to 178lbs; 10-15 more and I can be a womanizer again. It's close I can feel it.

[Shindig]

Down to 178lbs; 10-15 more and I can wear my girlfriend's clothes.

Because that's what you wanted to say, right?

[Pepe]

First he would need to have a girlfriend.

[Shindig]

Is he not still going out with that dwarf?

[Pepe]

Pretty sure she dumped him.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

He fell in love with her, let himself go, she dumped him due to his weight and now he's shedding it to win back her love.

[Manc]

She's clearly turned to food to get over you.

Or she's entering the lucrative BBW webcam market.

http://www.popdust.com/my-boyfriend-went-down-on-me-and-found-a-dead-kitten-1891094057.html

Can make some serious cash.

She was always insecure about how we looked as a couple. I've always been a lean lad. Now I'm out the picture she has no motivation.

[igor_balis]

My mate is in his 2nd ever long-term relationship. I knew his first one was a long distance thing with a Scottish girl he met on the internet when he was 18. On Friday though he revealed he met her on the IMDB message board for Friends, but more specifically on this like...ROLE PLAYING THREAD, where people posted as though they were actually Friends characters. I couldn't stop laughing for about 10 minutes.

[Magic]

Funnily enough that sounds like something you'd do, except maybe not as bad.

[Bartholomert]

Because that's what you wanted to say, right?

I'll be aesthetic af bishes will be 'mirin hard. Just a few more months of misery.

If I'm down to a lean and in shape 160-165 by next Summer I think I'll try out for the Georgetown soccer team.


He fell in love with her, let himself go, she dumped him due to his weight and now he's shedding it to win back her love.

I'm still with her, she was just antsy for a bit because of law school exams and me not giving her enough attention, but it's fine now.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

My mate is in his 2nd ever long-term relationship. I knew his first one was a long distance thing with a Scottish girl he met on the internet when he was 18. On Friday though he revealed he met her on the IMDB message board for Friends, but more specifically on this like...ROLE PLAYING THREAD, where people posted as though they were actually Friends characters. I couldn't stop laughing for about 10 minutes.

That is fucking incredible.

[Magic]

I had a really vivid, strange dream last night.

There was more to it but my memory kicks in as I had a bandage on my hand to protect a cut or something. I went in the shower with the intention of taking it off but got distracted because the bitch wife hadn't opened the windows from her shower so it was all smelly and steamed up. I opened the windows really wide (horizontal even though they can't do that) and went in the shower. I saw a really bad electric storm outside and noticed this bird on my neighbour's garage (my neighbour does have a garage but it certainly isn't level with my bathroom windows and you can't even see it). It looked like a cross between big bird (but a lot smaller) and a Kakapo, except it had browny yellow feathers. It had a beak like a boxing glove. It also had a frowny type look like Sam the Eagle. I'm sure such a thing exists. I didn't want it to get zapped so I invited it in through the windows. It wouldn't come so I went outside (this is where it changed to my childhood house) on the stairs and it flew on to my hand.

It went to bite me on the hand but the bandage protected it so I wasn't bothered. I patted it's head and we became besties. I didn't tell the wife about it and slowly it convinced me to murder her. This is when I woke up. I think the paranoid delusions are starting. :drool:

[Dquincy]

My mate is in his 2nd ever long-term relationship. I knew his first one was a long distance thing with a Scottish girl he met on the internet when he was 18. On Friday though he revealed he met her on the IMDB message board for Friends, but more specifically on this like...ROLE PLAYING THREAD, where people posted as though they were actually Friends characters. I couldn't stop laughing for about 10 minutes.

That is fucking brilliant. :D

What characters were they? Please find out.

[Bartholomert]

Last night was my first time 'on the pull' in the US since I lost a lot of weight, I have a new $60 haircut (had been growing my hair out to make it work) nice light summer tan, and the subconscious easy confidence of knowing I have a job lined up...

...and I felt 'it' again, in a way I hadn't since a short period sophomore year (where I once made out with 8 different girls in one night just to see if I could) and when I worked at a hotel in Turkey between Senior year and starting Duke (where I got banned from clubs for hooking up with too many girls and just picked them up literally off the street)...

I don't know if any of you even know what I'm describing, the sort of euphoric confidence bordering (if not crossing over into) delusion, just going into a bar, hitting on one of the hottest girls there, going bar hopping for the rest of the night after immediately establishing rapport, buying drinks, having her subtely compete for me with her hot friends, all of them unnecessarily touching and laughing at my comments, grinding in the corner of a club, her being so into it...I don't think most men ever experience it / have access to the experience and/or appreciate it...

I think I might not go out after tonight for a bit, just become a hermit for another 6 weeks so I can go from vaguely aesthetic to like 'woah' when I take off my shirt status...but I'm back, it's still there and I'm so close to being even better than I ever was...

[7om]

Where's the nightlife in DC, then? I actually have no idea.

[Bartholomert]

In my entire life I've only met two arguably three kids I know who know what I mean, all of them are like hint of 'exotic' Latin / Semitic, but phenotypically usually pass as Caucasian...I think you need the mix of coming from a more traditionally misognyistic culture, implanted into Western society always quietly feeling a need to prove yourself...otherwise you just wife up the first pretty girl who falls for you...

[Lewis]

I was 'bar hopping' on Thursday, and a barmaid gave me a load of Lotus biscuits, so make that four.

[Bartholomert]

Where's the nightlife in DC, then? I actually have no idea.

Nightlife in DC is awful, drinks are too expensive, girls are ugly, feminist and have disproportionate self-esteem. We usually go to U Streer or Adams Morgan but it's all bad...

[Shindig]

Nightlife in DC is awful, drinks are too expensive, girls are ugly, feminist and have disproportionate self-esteem. We usually go to U Streer or Adams Morgan but it's all bad...

"Hi, Honey. I selected you on the basis of specific traits to ensure the strongest possible offspring. As soon as you give birth, you can leave. I have a mother. She knows what to do."

[Bartholomert]

Everyone operates the same way, most just lack the necessary self-awareness to consciously tie their preferences to a deeper instinctual drive.

[Spikey M]

My mate is in his 2nd ever long-term relationship. I knew his first one was a long distance thing with a Scottish girl he met on the internet when he was 18. On Friday though he revealed he met her on the IMDB message board for Friends, but more specifically on this like...ROLE PLAYING THREAD, where people posted as though they were actually Friends characters. I couldn't stop laughing for about 10 minutes.

What character was he and what character was she?

[mugbull]

I'm going to Berlin to study abroad in the Fall. Sex life at Stanford is ok, but I'm expecting big things in the German nightclubs.

Also, this is a thing? https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/KitKatClub

[Luca]

Report back, Mok.

[mugbull]

The motto of the club is "Do what you want but stay in communication".

Just rolls off the tongue innit

[Bartholomert]

German girls are asexual, don't buy the PR

Russian/Ukranian>American>British>Anywhere in South America / South East Asia as a white guy> you're not getting laid

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Yeah I'm not so sure about Ukrainians :(

[Baz]

Mert sounds like a proper Louis. :nono:

(Pronounced like Lewis; a person who ditches his friends, in particular leaving one on their own, to go to the toilet, bar and/or pursue other interests. Named after my mates brother.)

[John]

where I got banned from clubs for hooking up with too many girls

:D

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Is Lewis a Louis? He did get a pack of Lotus biscuits.

[Bartholomert]

:D

Dude you think that shit is a joke, I was doing things you can't even fathom are real, one of the clubs tried to hire me as a promoter because of it while the others threatened me...it's because all the owners / bartenders were getting jealous

[Bartholomert]

Yeah I'm not so sure about Ukrainians :(

Ukrainians are beautiful and shameless gold digging sloots...we get along well...

Anyways last night was fun / I'm money as I suspected, but I need 10-15 more pounds so I'm going back into temporary retirement.

[Lewis]

Is Lewis a Louis? He did get a pack of Lotus biscuits.

I've got charm and a cheeky face.

[mugbull]

German girls are asexual, don't buy the PR


No, you just never got any because that was before you developed a front to compensate for your insecurities.

[Bartholomert]

No, you just never got any because that was before you developed a front to compensate for your insecurities.

Lol. We'll see how you feel in 6 months.

German guys are better than you and far more feminized / pussy, German girls are spoiled by a bunch of guys who suck up to them constantly, as a result German girls can access really top guys at will if they wanted to have casual sex, they don't so they generally just slightly trade up to be in long-term relationships.

I lived in Germany for three years, had two long-term girlfriends. I've been getting laid regularly since I've been 16 years old.

[Shindig]

Mert probably eluded to - but stopped short of - sexual assault. Or you're just a massively shit drunk.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

I might have a chance with a German girl then.

[Shindig]

Have you booked flights to Berlin yet?

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Searching now.

[Chrissy]

I've been getting laid regularly since I've been 16 years old.

No one that gets their hole that regular says that. Fucks sake lad.

[John]

Dude you think that shit is a joke, I was doing things you can't even fathom are real, one of the clubs tried to hire me as a promoter because of it while the others threatened me...it's because all the owners / bartenders were getting jealous

I think it's complete nonsense, not a joke.

I'm sure the bolded sentence will make someone, somewhere feel the inadequacy you want me to feel, so keep that rubbish for elsewhere.

[Baz]

No one that gets their hole that regular says that. Fucks sake lad.Indeed.

>got attention from someone in a club
>post about it online
>forever alone

[five time]

I've been getting laid regularly since I've been 16 years old.

Did the moment where he lied about sleeping with that girl and Offshore messaged her on facebook get archived on the old board?

[wullie]

Married now. Strange to be a Mr rather than a Miss.