March Football: Tommy Tuchel Clocks On

[Jimmy Floyd]

In February's thread, I promised that many issues would be settled during the month. This proved correct as Liverpool secured the Premier League crown for the second time. Congratulations to them, now just eleven titles behind Manchester United's all time record.

League action continues, but with top and bottom sewn up, the only real action is in the middle. Top five will get you a Champions League place this year and there are still numerous clubs in with a chance of that. Further down the table, the race for 11th rolls on, with both Spurs and United taking huge steps forward with recent wins.

It's not all good news for the Old Trafford club, however. Out of the FA Cup, they face a two-legger against Spain's 'Real Sociedad' in order to keep up their hopes of silverware this season. Also still involved in Europe are various other clubs from various countries in the following combinations, and this is what will dominate March soccer in the club arena.

Champions League
Paris St-German v Liverpool
Club Brugge v Aston Villa
Real Madrid v Atletico Madrid
PSV v Arsenal
Benfica v Barcelona
Dortmund v Lille
Bayern Munich v Leverkusen
Feyenoord v Internazionale

Conference League
Betis v Vitoria Guimaraes
Jagiellonia v Cercle Brugge
Celje v Lugano
Panathinaikos v Fiorentina
Copenhagen v Chelsea
Molde v Legia Warsaw
Pafos v Djurgarden
Borac v Rapid Vienna

Europa League
Viktoria Plzen v Lazio
Bodo and indeed Glimt v Olympiakos
Ajax v Frankfurt
AZ v Tottenham
Roma v Athletic Bilbao
Fenerbahce v Rangers
Fake Steaua Bucharest v Lyon
Real Sociedad v Manchester

The humdrum dullness of club football will thankfully depart us in the second half of the month, as internationals return. World Cup qualifying is on the agenda - somehow the WC is only a year and a bit away now - and here is the form:

Asia
Asia is the furthest along already, with Japan, Korea and Iran looking good and three more automatic spots available. Uzbekistan and Iraq have a decent home fixture each this matchday and can make progress towards their first finals ever/in ages respectively. Australia have more work to do and may need a win in Red China to keep things moving.

Africa
We're 40% of the way through the groups which return after a 9 month break. Most of the big boys are there or thereabouts as they look the finish in top spot which gets you to the finals. One exception is Nigeria who have made a right balls of it so far with 3 points from 4 games. They, as Arsenal have urged them to do for so long, Visit Rwanda in the first game with the hosts currently in top spot, defeat there would leave the super eagles looking less super than planned. Group B looks among the most competitive, with Sudan leading Senegal and DR Congo at the moment.

South America
All you need to know about this interminable league is that Chile and Peru are terrible, while Argentina lead and everybody else is meh. Luckily there are 6 auto qualifying spots so in most cases, meh will be more than enough to make the finals. Paraguay are currently in the last of the auto spots, and they have a 4 point gap to Bolivia and Venezuela, who are dicing for the single playoff place. Brazil's determined mediocrity continues, they are currently 5th and they will travel to face Argentina at the Monumental this matchday for what could be a marquee drubbing.

North America
Despite having made almost no progress at all with the qualifiers for their home World Cup, they aren't bothering to play any this time either. Why bother? Kick back, push some tasteless beans around a pan, mañana mañana. Instead they're playing the nations league FINALS.

Europe
The European qualifying kicks off this matchday, although some of the groups playing still don't know what teams are going to be in them, which is a bit of a mess if you ask me. Fortunately, England's group has no such ambiguity and Thomas Tuchel kicks off his time in charge with tough tests at home to Albania and Latvia. Will he survive until the World Cup, or be hounded out of his job by the press? Like and subscribe to find out. Wales also play twice in their group. Other teams are involved in the Nations League playoffs.

Steal a MARCH on third-month football in this thread.

[Gray Fox]

Manchester United have never actually won the Premier League btw.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Last Premiership was 06-07, so I think they have. Unless we're declaring the Barclays to be a separate entity.

[Danny]

Won it before Barclays when it was Carlin and no sponsor (so also just Premier League).

[Kikó]

Looking forward to watching us play again. Hopefully the RAT FACED ONE can set up Obi for some Spanish fun.

(2-0 defeat)

[niko_cee]

Just seen Amazon have gone for PSV v Arsenal for their Tuesday game. A poor choice.

[Waffdon]

They’re always going to pick the game with an English team involved

[phonics]

We are massive.

[Jimmy Floyd]

I'd happily sacrifice viewer count just to see what Arsenal fans would do.

[-james-]

I was just looking at Australia's most recent squad, and bloody hell they've fallen off. I applaud anyone that can name more than one member of it.

[Luke Emia]

Suspect we may get done by PSG over there whenever it is. They seem like they have gotten their act together, once again I've seen us win the Champions League it would be lovely to win it but if we get knocked out and then it's one game a week for the rest of the title run in I'd be reasonably ok with that.

JUST DON'T FUCK THE LEAGUE UP! Which may be ridiculous bearing in mind we are 13 points clear but I just don't trust us to get it done.

[Jimmy Floyd]

I'll repeat, Liverpool are confirmed champions. The trophy has already been awarded in a brief ceremony at the town hall.

[Shindig]

JUST DON'T FUCK THE LEAGUE UP! Which may be ridiculous bearing in mind we are 13 points clear but I just don't trust us to get it done.

From one career pessimist to another, it's sewn up. You could have the whole squad retire tomorrow (seriously, that would make the League Cup final interesting) and still win it.

[Gray Fox]

Even I'm accepting that it's done.

If we had prime City after us I would never declare, but this is Arsenal. They were 9 points behind before their injuries began.

[niko_cee]

WW3/nuclear apocalypse inbound.

[Gray Fox]

I also imagine an invite to the parade will be made to Klopp, who will reject. Apparently Slot has been keen to get him to a few games this year, but he's said no every time.

[phonics]

I don’t think I’ve ever gone more proper football man then seeing Merino receive a through ball 3 yards to the right of the penalty spot only to see him turn around for a cutback.

[phonics]

What a back and forth 15 minutes. Could be any combination of score from 2-2 downwards if the situations were a combined 2 yards different.

[phonics]

Nwaneri is quite good. How do we have two seemingly generational players that play in the exact same position.

[niko_cee]

lol at Perisic giving it the biggun before this shitshow.

[phonics]

lol at Perisic giving it the biggun before this shitshow.

"It's the history of the Tottenham"

[niko_cee]

You're not allowed to call them Tottenham anymore, apparently. Style guide is Spurs or Tottenham Hotspur.

[phonics]

You're not allowed to call them Tottenham anymore, apparently. Style guide is Spurs or Tottenham Hotspur.

Fine.

"Lads, it's Spurs"

There can't be many clubs in the world that have quotes from seperate eras that summarise that the outside world views your club as generational losers.

[phonics]

That legitimately might be the worst goal ever scored.

[Waffdon]

That’s a stonking finish from Alvarez

[Luke Emia]

Post in the right thread you bunch of cunts. It’s March.

[phonics]

Post in the right thread you bunch of cunts. It’s March.

First piece of admin work I've done in years :cool:

[phonics]

I cannot wait for the rapist to get out of the club.

[Lofty]

Won't be long if his attempts to evade justice there were an indicator of things to come.

[phonics]

He's out of contract in the summer and it looks like they won't be renewing him thankfully.

Will be interesting to see what happens if we do go through considering the next leg has to be in Spain.

[phonics]

I missed the first 5 minutes and it's 5-1?

[Jimmy Floyd]

How modern football it is that Arsenal are five-one to the good and yet the twitter trending topic is 'Odegaard' as fans whine that he is shit and needs replacing in the summer.

[phonics]

How modern football it is that Arsenal are five-one to the good and yet the twitter trending topic is 'Odegaard' as fans whine that he is shit and needs replacing in the summer.

One of the most bizarre vendettas I've come across in quite some time. Any sane person should be able to watch him on the ball for 5 minutes and understand he's a top 1% player in terms of technique and then you factor in that he's the guy organising and leading the press as well so you can't call him lazy. Never understood the issue.

[Lofty]

Basically he was rushed back from injury and had to play half fit having just had a new baby with an unfamiliar setup around him due to the injuries and chopping and changing, but the knuckle draggers can't work out he won't be playing the same level as when him Saka and White are basically doing blindfolded rondo drills in down the opposition's flank.

[niko_cee]

I'm not sure what is worse, the idea of a halftime show at the world cup final, or the idea of Coldplay curating or, god help us performing at, it.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Coldplay ft. David Guetta ft. Pitbull. Maybe Infantino spitting some bars over the bridge.

[niko_cee]

Rubiales as background 'Bez' dancer / crotch grabber-in-chief, his own that is, I guess the other read on that title has probably be claimed by another in chief both generally and for the event.

[Pepe]

If we need to have such things just have Shakira do all of them. Her music is made for it. Or ask Jennifer Lopez to sing let's get loud every single time. Same dress and everything.

[niko_cee]

What's the deal with PSG now then? Are they no longer the cheese-eating surrender monkeys they once were now they've been shorn of their BIG NAMES or are they still flat track bullies starved of meaningful competitive conditioning?

[Waffdon]

It’s hard to tell.

Desire Doue is a future Balon D’or winner though and I hope he starts. Think they may try and opt for a bit more experience though as the team is fairly young outside of a couple defenders and Dembele

[Jimmy Floyd]

How many ballon d'ors are you giving out over the next ten years?

[randomlegend]

gEnErAtIoNaL!1

[Mike]

It would be a little amusing to see PSG win the CL after Mbappe left to go win it with Madrid.

[Waffdon]

It’s hard to tell.

Desire Doue is a future Balon D’or winner though and I hope he starts. Think they may try and opt for a bit more experience though as the team is fairly young outside of a couple defenders and Dembele

Still time for Rice, Hudson-Odoi and Gilmour

[Waffdon]

This genuinely hasn’t been close. Liverpool can’t get near this front 3

Ffs, McCoist had me thinking that goal wasn’t getting disallowed. Salah fluke in bound now

[Magic]

Lol goodbye.

Edit: what? I thought he was off?

[Waffdon]

Stonewall foul. No idea if it was in the box or not but should really be a red as it’s last man

[Waffdon]

How is this still 0-0 :lol:

[Luke Emia]

How is this still 0-0 :lol:

Alisson.

[randomlegend]

Nunez on that counter :D

He's woeful.

[Waffdon]

Oh my fucking god. How do they keep doing this

[Gray Fox]

Nunez assist?

[Mike]

Of course

[niko_cee]

lol

Probably need to play a bit better next week

[Gray Fox]

If they even think of selling Alisson in the summer, I'll off John Henry myself.

[Gray Fox]

Also the Endo run continues. Liverpool have never conceded a goal after he has been sent on to see out a game.

[John Arne]

Just watched the highlights, that looked like a proper smash and grab. Alisson is a proper legend.
Also watched the Bayern highlights... a contender for worst camera view... it's way too low. Also Tapsoba is a fucking idiot.

[Ben]

The first Bayern goal was beautiful. You don't see that sort of goal much anymore.

Also the Musiala touch at the end to set up what should have been a fourth was insane.

[niko_cee]

Will be a bit of a shame to see PSG go out [if they do] as they seem a bit of a throwback team with all their ball carriers. Exciting to watch. Also a bit of a shame the Georgian lad has gone there as it's a bit of a waste of talent having him jobbing around Ligue UN for much of the time.

[Serj]

Yeah, I'd be interested to see an analysis of what the average amount of stepovers/dribblings is nowadays in the top leagues (not sure if Ligue 1 would be included there, mind) compared to what PSG players are doing. Seemed like a team out of the late nineties yesterday, with 200% the fitness.

[Gray Fox]

I thought Trent actually delivered a solid defensive performance all things considered. Meanwhile on the other side Dembele was absolutely lolling past Robertson, but was very Theo Walcott with his end product.

Agreed though. You dont often see teams with two forwards/wingers that drive at you with the ball.

[Ben]

Dembele has 26 goals this season. Either Luis Enrique is a genius, or Ligue 1 is even worse than we think.

[John Arne]

I was bang wrong on Dembele. At Barcelona he could barely kick a ball, let alone run it it and skin defenders - he was genuinely fucking crap. Even at Dortmund he was very hot & cold. Either he has kicked on incredibly, or as Ben suggests - Ligue Un is the new Eredivisie. Perhaps both.

[Waffdon]

Dembele has 26 goals this season. Either Luis Enrique is a genius, or Ligue 1 is even worse than we think.

Enrique is a don and Chelsea turned him down for Pochettino :lol:

[Ben]

Speaking of Ligue 1:

https://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/football/articles/cx2x3ym5xxeo

[John Arne]

The amazing thing is that the penalty check (for which he was demonstrating) was eventually not given by the ref. They guy is a nutjob.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Too much of the med fringe has a problem with emotional incontinence.

[Lofty]

Dembele has 26 goals this season. Either Luis Enrique is a genius, or Ligue 1 is even worse than we think.

Lacazette couldn't buy a goal at Arsenal before he left and went there firing them in all over the shop. They definitely have a big problem with a gap between the top teams and the rest.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Happy to say we've named a banter XI tonight, I'll soon be putting the cope into Copenhagen.

[Gray Fox]

Seems like the FM classic of naming out of form star player in the team against inferior opposition, in order to get him goals.

[Waffdon]

Imagine doubting Cobham.

Best line up he’s ever done

[niko_cee]

Are they playing both James siblings?

[Waffdon]

Shumaira "future Balon D’or" Mheuka :cool:

[niko_cee]

When is Kendry Paez coming to save the day? Is he still a thing?

[Waffdon]

When he turns 18. Hes been swept aside by Estevao who is putting up Neymar numbers in Brazil already getting called up regularly by Brazil

I got excited about one player starting but this set up is completely dire. There’s like 5 players our of position

[Jimmy Floyd]

Florence are 2-0 down, this draw is opening up before our very eyes.

[Ben]

When is Kendry Paez coming to save the day? Is he still a thing?

Until Waff’s post I had him figured as one of Chelsea’s perennially loaned out geezers who had been and gone, released into a six year contract in the Russian leagues at the ripe age of 31.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Watching us is like something from the Afcon group stage. Guinea, let's say. Just a load of big black blokes who put up physical numbers but can't trap a ball.

[Waffdon]

I wish it was. Instead they’re happy with 70% possession, side to side passing and no shots on target yet again.

[niko_cee]

Who's the next bald fraud off the rank? Ten Hag? Bruno [Sartor] again?

Xabi Alonso? His stock seems to have fallen a bit after the freak season.

[Shindig]

Frank plays his way into a second stint.

[Waffdon]

Frank when he gets Coventry promoted

[Waffdon]

Dewsbury Hall is still somehow on the pitch. Drinkwater was genuinely a better player for Chelsea

[Jimmy Floyd]

Another dogshit team think they can play out from the back. See ya.

[niko_cee]

Is this Orri Oskarsson the Orri [Freyr] Oskarsson's son?

[Ben]

https://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/football/articles/c1mnp3vmnxro

Waff

[randomlegend]

"Tina" Livramento is funnier that it ought to be.

[Danny]

Is this Orri Oskarsson the Orri [Freyr] Oskarsson's son?

His dad is a former football, just not the FM legend (or was it CM still at that point). I looked it up when I first saw him as I hoped the same.

[Shindig]

Hall and Botman out for the rest of the season, the former's broke a bone in his foot and the latter is getting a knee operation. We're getting into square peg territory with our defence. :D

[phonics]

I've seen both abysmal and amazing things on this account but this one stunlocked me.

1898102452383346823

[Yevrah]

You'd get a better cheese sandwich than whatever that shit is, but that would cost more at my local. £25 for a pint and a burger last week. I await the Gary's Economics piece on who in all this price gouging is making an absolute fortune. Some fucker must be and it's an absolute disgrace.

[phonics]

You'd get a better cheese sandwich than whatever that shit is, but that would cost more at my local. £25 for a pint and a burger last week. I await the Gary's Economics piece on who in all this price gouging is making an absolute fortune. Some fucker must be and it's an absolute disgrace.

Much like an abused housewife, at this point I'd take being ripped off for the burger if they replaced the brioche bun with something that held together for longer than 8 seconds.

[-james-]

That does look a nice bit of Brie tbf.

[niko_cee]

Yeah, if they could have just buerred the bread a bit it'd be a winner in eating terms.

£25 beer and a burger must be a £17 plus burger, that's on you Yev.

But I'm sure there's an economics answer to why everything costs more, hmmm, it's a tough one. Too many asylum seekers getting into burgers I reckon

[Yevrah]

It's on me in the sense I paid for it, but that's pretty much standard round these parts.

[igor_balis]

It's on me in the sense I paid for it, but that's pretty much standard round these parts.

It's unquestionably outrageous but not that representative of the whole country.

[Lofty]

Who's the next bald fraud off the rank? Ten Hag? Bruno [Sartor] again?

Xabi Alonso? His stock seems to have fallen a bit after the freak season.

Do you reckon Alonso regrets not taking the Liverpool job?

[niko_cee]

I would say yes.

Will he be the bright young thing when the next round of jobs, like City and Madrid, come up? The two former clubs he had the choice of last year [perhaps] now have bald alternatives with their feet firmly under the table.

It's why Chris Wilder should have gone to Arsenal when that was a rumoured thing. But why would he want to leave high flying Sheffield United they said. Sacked 6 months later.

[Kikó]

And Owen Coyle seniorguvnor

[Spikey M]

Football in the sun. :drool:

[John Arne]

What does Elliot have to do to get a start?

[Shindig]

Looking forward to seeing this Forest side in Europe.

[John Arne]

To think some people used to think that Ederson was better than Alisson :D

[Giggles]

To think some people used to think that Ederson was better than Alisson :D

Maybe he was and he's not now.

[John Arne]

Nah, he used to be very good, but never better then Alisson. Though I get your point.

[Waffdon]

Frank Lampard :cool:

[wullie]

Another classic Mark Robins late winner

[John Arne]

Commentator on my feed giving 'Salah' the full Arabic pronunciation, which is great... but then proceeds with Nunez, Gravenberch and Szobozslai in dull monotonal English.

[John Arne]

Nunez is such a fucking idiot.

[Gray Fox]

Classic calamity at the back. Very game after a European tie in midweek this.

[Ben]

As it stands with Palace and Liverpool not winning, I’ve got an open goal with Chelsea to win £2900 in LMS.

[Ben]

To think some people used to think that Ederson was better than Alisson :D

:harold:

[Gray Fox]

John Arne with the big Southampton assist.

Quick, tell us how great Ramsdale is.

[John Arne]

:harold:

I mean Alisson can't control van Dijk's ineptitude.

[John Arne]

John Arne with the big Southampton assist.

Quick, tell us how great Ramsdale is.

I called Darwin a idiot, so I'm claiming that. Great finish from the idiot.

[Gray Fox]

Anfield induced madness. Albeit Southampton are pants.

[Gray Fox]

That's a lol handball from the Southampton lad there.

[Waffdon]

Palmer is broken :lol:

[Lofty]

United have been dogshit recently so no doubt they'll take 3 points handily this afternoon.

[Dan]

Thanks for the points today Magic Should pretty much see us safe, especially if we can sort Plymouth on Wednesday too. As far from the relegation zone as we are from 8th now.

Form table has us top half around the playoff spots over the last 6/10 games, so as long as we can keep hold of our best players & get a bit better luck with injuries we could start looking up the table rather than down next season.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Agent Kepa with a splendidly unnecessary bit of goalkeeping there.

[John Arne]

Kepa, you thick twat.

[John Arne]

Jed Spence has one of the most punchable faces in football.

[Jimmy Floyd]

I'm trying to work out how many points needed for top 5. 68? Maybe even less.

[Magic]

Thanks for the points today Magic Should pretty much see us safe, especially if we can sort Plymouth on Wednesday too. As far from the relegation zone as we are from 8th now.

Form table has us top half around the playoff spots over the last 6/10 games, so as long as we can keep hold of our best players & get a bit better luck with injuries we could start looking up the table rather than down next season.

The amount of posts about beating Reading's record after the Blunts win made this and our impending defeat by Millwall am absolute inevitability.

[Waffdon]

I'm trying to work out how many points needed for top 5. 68? Maybe even less.

Fairly sure Chelsea could lose every away game and still get T5 with home wins. Villa aren’t going to be a threat with that horrendous GD never mind the fact they’re 4 behind having played an extra game. Newcastle have fallen off a cliff and wouldn’t be shocked if they drop more points tomorrow putting everything into the cup final. Brighton are the other team in contention but they’re due a rocky patch again. Also face Forest, City and Villa in their next 3 which only benefits Chelsea further. In short, it would be an embarrassment not to make CL from here.

Caicedo is just ridiculous btw. It’s like watching Kante at times the way he wins the ball back and is responsible for the midfield on his own at times. Deserves so much more

[Ben]

That United team is honking.

[randomlegend]

Cue us inexplicably deservedly winning, then being shit again for the rest of the reason.

[Manc]

Seven central defenders on the pitch. What a time to be alive.

[Ben]

And no strikers.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

The beautiful game.

[niko_cee]

This is like watching paint dry.

[AJ23]

The worst game in the world.

United have a player called 'Heaven' on the bench.

Bring him on. We need some divine intervention.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Bruno :cool:

Lovely free kick.

[niko_cee]

Neville was right about the wall. It was miles back. Also thought the foul was much closer in as well.

[Danny]

Raya :lol:

[Ben]

Anthony Taylor marking out 12 yards for the wall. :D

Taylor is from Manchester. Just getting the conspiracy in before phonics/AFTV.

[AJ23]

Great free-kick from Rentokil.

Lay some more traps.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Heaven is a place on Earth.

[Gray Fox]

I look forward to Arteta insisting on the tape measure added to the referees belt, next to the foam spray.

[Shindig]

Pesky Premier League balls.

[AJ23]

Season done for Arsenal. Apart from the Champions League.

Only team to have beaten Liverpool in the league? Forest. Wow.

What a mad season.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Nice to see the youngsters know how to dive already.

[niko_cee]

Season done for Arsenal. Apart from the Champions League.



Is there any chance Saka is going to be back for the quarter final? Can't see them troubling either Madrid with this type of team but at full strength they'd be in with a shout.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Had to be that prick.

[Dan]

The amount of posts about beating Reading's record after the Blunts win made this and our impending defeat by Millwall am absolute inevitability.

I didn’t remember a penalty shout but turns out it was early on & up the opposite end of the pitch from me. Does look like we got away with one there, but the ref normally works in the Prem so of course he can’t get a decision correct.

Not having to play any of the top 7 sounds like it would be an advantage for Leeds, but it feels like they might have been better off against the bigger sides than the jobbers.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

We should have won it there.

[Jimmy Floyd]

The fact that we are only five points off 2nd is a serious indictment on English football. Aside from Liverpool it's been the weakest competition for many years.

[Manc]

Somehow about Chelsea.

[Jimmy Floyd]

They were one of the teams that played today resulting in the points gap described. Poor post.

[Gray Fox]

Do we think this is a result of the rest of the league catching up in the ability to spend and compete, thus becoming more of the norm? Or is this simply a down year and we return to 95+ points from Man City again next time?

[Shindig]

I think FSR has crunched the pack up a bit, yes.

[John Arne]

I've only just really clocked that we only have 9 games of the season to go... Are we actually going to win the league? I'm still waiting for City to leapfrog us :D

EDIT: 10pts more and 'the Citizens' can't catch us... that's the next target.

[Mike]

I've only just really clocked that we only have 9 games of the season to go... Are we actually going to win the league? I'm still waiting for City to leapfrog us :D

EDIT: 10pts more and 'the Citizens' can't catch us... that's the next target.
I am getting increasingly less nervous about it falling apart.

[niko_cee]

Come on now.

It's literally only nuclear annihilation that is a concern now.

Arsenal will probably struggle to break 70 points.

[Shindig]

You can realistically win 3 from the last 9 and still take the title. Everyone behind you will drop points.

[Luke Emia]

I think 10 more points probably does it this time around. Especially if 3 of those were in beating Arsenal at Anfield as that takes them to a maximum of 82 and I'm fairly confident they aren't winning their remaining 9 other games based on what they are doing at the minute.

[niko_cee]

It's come to something when the attitude is I'll be reasonably confident once it's mathematically certain.

[Jimmy Floyd]

This is one of the most pathetic displays I can remember. Liverpool is one of the most successful clubs in history, has collapsed about 1.5 times in 100 years, and the title was done in November.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

You could lose all your remaining games and you'd win it easily.

[Mike]

I did ask Baz if we’re going the parade the other day.

[niko_cee]

https://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/football/articles/c7571gng06wo


Some Manchester United players are "not good enough" and some are "overpaid", the club's co-owner Sir Jim Ratcliffe says.

Midfielder Casemiro, striker Rasmus Hojlund, goalkeeper Andre Onana, and wingers Antony and Jadon Sancho - who are on loan at other clubs - were namechecked by the billionaire in an interview with BBC Sport as players his regime had "inherited".

:lol:


"For Sancho, who now plays for Chelsea and we pay half his wages, we're paying £17m to buy him in the summer."

:D

[Ben]

Outstanding stuff. :D

[Ben]

Russell Martin might have been a bit of a lol manager at Southampton but he’s doing really good analysis on MNF here. I remember Gary O’Neil being pretty excellent when he was on too.

[Jimmy Floyd]

This Sir Jim media round is truly one for the ages. There's a great clip where forensic newshound Gary Neville pins him down on the staff canteen business and the knight shifts in his seat with almost parodical discomfort.

[Luke Emia]

He wants to finish up where ‘Liverpool or Real Madrid are today’ that’s a way to endear yourself to the fans Brexit Jim.

[Ben]

This Sir Jim media round is truly one for the ages. There's a great clip where forensic newshound Gary Neville pins him down on the staff canteen business and the knight shifts in his seat with almost parodical discomfort.

The huge lump that entered his throat when he uttered the words “if I look at our salary bill” says it all.

[AJ23]

Russell Martin is the type of guy who can't look at his own faults but can point them out to everyone else.

Must have been a ballache to play under him. You can see why he failed. Stick to the media work, like Gary Neville.

[Kikó]

https://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/football/articles/c7571gng06wo



:lol:



:D

The name check (which night happen again as I'm only part way through) was him saying we're still only buying players this summer that we bought 2-3 years ago rather than necessarily saying they're shit.

[niko_cee]

Did he really fail? All the promoted sides are going down, likely in the order they came up and the new guy is worse if anything. Could say he overachieved in the championship and paid the price for not having a team anywhere near the necessary quality to stay in the premier league, even if the way hew ent about it was pretty funny.

[AJ23]

Did he really fail? All the promoted sides are going down, likely in the order they came up and the new guy is worse if anything. Could say he overachieved in the championship and paid the price for not having a team anywhere near the necessary quality to stay in the premier league, even if the way hew ent about it was pretty funny.

Forest got promoted under Steve Cooper playing similar expansive football.

It wasn't working in the Premier League and Cooper adapted his style to be more pragmatic to get results. Wasn't pretty but he kept Forest up.

I'd say Russell Martin is a stubborn fucker who failed because his ego was too big to want to change.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Ratcliffe is such a slimy cunt. Charm offensive (if you can call it that) in the media and then the next morning puts out the artist's impressions of a 100,000 seater that he 'hopes that the government will get behind'.

[niko_cee]

He said there was no date in place for when building work on the stadium would begin, adding: "It depends how quickly the Government gets going with the regeneration programme. I think they want to get going quite quickly."

:happycry:

The leveling up and growth agenda, just maybe not what the public thought those things meant.

[Shindig]

Hopefully R-One makes a comeback and posts an urban exploration of the decaying stadium. In more tragic news:


Pubs in the area are also unable to show the Final live on TV due to licensing restrictions.

Fine, I'll watch the final back at the hotel. Dickheads. :(

[niko_cee]

Presumably that can't apply to all pubs in London.

[Shindig]

Nah, but my plan A was to turn up at Wembley and then find a pub nearby to watch it.

[-james-]

That new Man Utd stadium makes me feel nauseous.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Looks like a shit new Pokémon gym.

[Shindig]

Another £2bn price tag. Is that just the going rate for stadiums now?

EDIT: It's a circus tent. :D

[randomlegend]

All this jealousy is very unbecoming of you lads.

[Ben]

It'll look great in the Championship tbf.

[Shindig]

In all fairness, the tent canopy reminds me of the Olympiastadion in Munich. At the very least, it's not another generic bowl.


The 'umbrella' surrounding the stadium will harvest rainwater

Good idea, lads.


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mjemIU7bVHM

Meanwhile Newcastle's stadium talk is all a bit weird at the minute. If we have to vacate St. James' the three groundsharing options touted are: The Riverside (miles away), Stadium of Light (Heh. Sunderland's already laughed that out of the park. Although it's on the metro network) or the ARE YOU KIDDING ME choice of Murrayfield.

[Spoonsky]

Feels like a trap game tonight for the Liver Birds. Weird to go into a hashtag European night at Anfield against a very good team knowing you only have to defend a lead. Though the last scenario I can remember like that, ended up with Andrea Dossena scoring against Real Madrid so who knows.

[Shindig]

If 7 of your first team could catch a load of injuries, that'd be lovely.

[Gray Fox]

We should be fine. Goal head start and importantly at home. Not only the fans but the Anfield pitch is very small compared to your big European venues.

What is odd though is that if we were to lose tonight, they Sunday would be the last game of the season almost.

[Waffdon]

How many 1 on 1 opportunities are these lot going to bottle over the tie

Mendes has absolutely donned Salah in both games so far. Bullied him every time they get close

[phonics]

This psg team play like how we used to play and I miss it so much.

[Magic]

Holy shit Nunez is absolutely WANK.

[Waffdon]

Salah to miss please and thank you

[Gray Fox]

This psg team play like how we used to play and I miss it so much.

They've been very, very impressive. Not having to carry a passenger or two has allowed their other players to shine.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

If Vitinha had missed that...

[phonics]

They force their opponents to make a decision.

[Magic]

Lol Nunez...

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

:harold:

[Boydy]

Of course Nunez missed. Alisson should have been taking one before him.

[Lewis]

Donnarumma is twenty-six and minted why is he letting his hair disappear?

[Magic]

Hahahaha.

[Bernanke]

Nunez is absolute dogshit.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Donnarumma :cool:

[Boydy]

Curtis Jones is shite too.

[Magic]

Love it.

[Waffdon]

Cole Palmer celebration. Global superstar

[Manc]

Bro is built for penalties.

[Gray Fox]

Donnarumma takes up about the entire side of the goal there.

Properly good tie overall. I'd argue the two best playing sides in Europe there but PSG looked very good. I'd say they deserved it on balance. Some Liverpool shortcomings highlighted in that game too.

[phonics]

Playing PSG in the Champions League and #BOTTLING it and looking like #MentalityMidgets.

[Shindig]

Are the highlights being kind or were Liverpool genuinely second best over the two legs?

[Luke Emia]

Donnarumma takes up about the entire side of the goal there.

Properly good tie overall. I'd argue the two best playing sides in Europe there but PSG looked very good. I'd say they deserved it on balance. Some Liverpool shortcomings highlighted in that game too.

They were much the better team over the two legs. First team all season who have really worked out how to beat the press and they weathered everything we could throw at them at the start of each half, as well as being much the better team in extra time. They will beat Villa handily I think in the next round and then it’s a toss-up in the semi, but I wouldn’t bet against them winning the whole thing.

Weird that the subs we bought on looked far more leggy than the starters.

[Luke Emia]

Are the highlights being kind or were Liverpool genuinely second best over the two legs?

Had chances in the second leg especially early could have been a couple up before PSG scored. But, they were the better team.

[Lewis]

I miss away goals.

[Spoonsky]

It was one of the best football matches I've watched in a long time. PSG are class but always felt like we could have won it (until extra time). Probably should have rested more players against Southampton in hindsight, they were dead on their feet in extra time. PSG as a squad are very likeable but being in a bar full of Frenchmen when this happens will never not be a horrible experience.

5 years to the day since we lost that one at Anfield to Atletico, and the world collapsed over the following week. Guess it'll be nuclear war to ruin the parade this time.

[SvN]

Donnarumma takes up about the entire side of the goal there.

Properly good tie overall. I'd argue the two best playing sides in Europe there but PSG looked very good. I'd say they deserved it on balance. Some Liverpool shortcomings highlighted in that game too.


Lmao. You reckon?

https://i.imgur.com/RbP1Nh4.png

[Gray Fox]

Oof. I knew they were better but that's rough. Their forwards were a nightmare.

Probably a good night for Newcastle too.

[Ben]

If Livramento can keep Salah quiet then they have a good chance.

[Magic]

Oof. I knew they were better but that's rough. Their forwards were a nightmare.

Probably a good night for Newcastle too.

Did you actually watch the two games aye?

[Gray Fox]

Missed the first half of both games at work. Some patchy radio coverage for the rest.

[Magic]

Ok well y'all got minced.

[niko_cee]

Should have gone for the Kweev penalty saver sub at the end.

Shame as Liverpool probably have five excellent penalty takers but they weren't all on the pitch at the end - Mac Allister in particular a big miss. Trent too. You'd back Jota over Daz the Spaz. Team also missed Gakpo.

Having the best / a very good record in the groups rarely seems to pay off. It was Madrid last time after having the second best record [I think]. Paying the price for all those years of Porto in the quarter finals.

PSG are the only team Liverpool have played this season that have looked better than them, possibly the only team to have bettered them statistically as well so were fully deserving. I look forward to them inexplicably losing to Real in the semis after equally playing them off the pitch.

[Gray Fox]

I'd like to think there will be some positive from it in the long term. Last time we won the league we did not go on to add to the squad in a meaningful way.

While this team is obviously good, there is an obvious step down in quality on the bench in the outfield areas that aren't the forwards. I'd like to think this is improved on in the summer. Contract situations aside, he clearly needs at least a starting left back, a centre forward and someone else to sit in front of the defence. It's been quite obvious in games lately that Mac/Gravenberch look fucked after about 70 minutes because there is no one else to do the job there.

As you say I think Gakpo is now the starter at LW. Diaz blows very hot and cold.

From what I saw, the PSG performance is ultimately what Slot wants to get us to. Dominate the ball regardless of opponent. Vitinha looked different gravy.

[AJ23]

Hopefully R-One makes a comeback and posts an urban exploration of the decaying stadium. In more tragic news:



Fine, I'll watch the final back at the hotel. Dickheads. :(

Go nearby. Neasden and Kilburn bars are showing the game.

Get the tube back or an uber. Probably a better vibe too. Especially in Kilburn. You might not make it home.

[niko_cee]

'Atleti' getting through would make that side of the draw pretty interesting, 'mon you shithouse cunts.

[Lewis]

Not to sound like a woman but you wonder how a professional can put a penalty there.

[Lewis]

I don't think I've ever seen that.

[-james-]

VAR chalking off a shootout pen. Yeah fuck off.

[Lewis]

The shittest penalty of the lot winning it as well lol.

[Manc]

The fact that Alvarez slipped makes that all the more mental. VAR has to be binned.

[Waffdon]

Just watched the penalties. The most Real Madrid way to qualify.

[Gray Fox]

So if a keeper comes off the line, it's a retake, but attacker slips accidentally and is just tough shit? Seems unfair.

[Spoonsky]

It's bullshit. I've watched it a dozen times and can't even see when he touches it. VAR has led to refs who are either fully autistic, absolutely obsessed with becoming the story, or probably both.

[Magic]

Just watched the penalties. The most Real Madrid way to qualify.

It's a mentality thing. They'd won that shootout before a ball was even kicked.

Liverpool will never have this, victim mentality.

[phonics]

It sounds arrogant but I am much more confident at winning the tie against Real Madrid than Atletico.

edit: I've just seen that penalty fiasco. Okay it's just a fix for Real Madrid so maybe not.

[Spoonsky]

It's a mentality thing. They'd won that shootout before a ball was even kicked.

Liverpool will never have this, victim mentality.

Liverpool are notable for losing finals on penalties, it's true.

[Magic]

It sounds arrogant but I am much more confident at winning the tie against Real Madrid than Atletico.

edit: I've just seen that penalty fiasco. Okay it's just a fix for Real Madrid so maybe not.

Lol. See above.

[Lofty]

If Saka is back Arsenal have a puncher's chance of making it a game. But 180 minutes against Atleti would have been eye bleeding.

[Yevrah]

Indeed. From a neutral's perspective I applaud the nonsense that went on last night. Arsenal/Real should be a belter.

[niko_cee]

Don't really hold out much hope for them. Is there any chance of Saka being back?

I guess they could maybe do a number on them defensively, but at the very least they need to get back to scoring from set pieces.

Maybe 'Razza' can reprise the role of Fernando Torres versus Barcelona all those years ago.

[Yevrah]

Who is at home first?

[niko_cee]

Should be Real as isn't the whole draw lined up 'in favour' of the top 8 teams? Although, thinking about it, that makes no sense. Probably Arsenal as they are in the upper bit of that bracket I think. It is indeed Arsenal.

[Manc]

I wouldn't give Arsenal a rat's chance.

[Gray Fox]

Arsenal are actually very suited to European football with their style of play. Also have the best defence left in the tournament. I suspect they would need Saka back and fully firing to take Madrid down though. They've always got some bullshit up their sleeve to get through as well.

[randomlegend]

Disasterclass from the referree in the United game within the first 20 minutes.

[Waffdon]

This set up is beyond tragic. Maresca absolutely hates full backs. 4 centre backs on the pitch and 2 of the centre mids staying wide. Horrific to watch

Sunday will be tragic. Going to make Arsenal look like prime Barcelona

[Waffdon]

Another half with zero shots never mind any on target. He is like a bald Scott Parker these past few months.

[randomlegend]

Very much looked like the Sociedad player got the ball on first viewing of that one.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

That was so clearly not a pen, shocking that the ref originally gave it.

Bruno has been great.

[Luke Emia]

I can only assume this ref is Howard Webb’s love child.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

We are so fucking back, lads.

Stick it in your diary.

13/03/2025, the day United were RE-BORN.

[Lewis]

This could be like Rafa Benitez's 2013 Europa League triumph of pure shit.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Some magnificently dog wank teams left in the Europa. Pretty much any of them could win it. Could do without it being United or Spurs as that would presumably evaporate the 5th CL place.

[niko_cee]

No, you can have as many teams as logically possible in it now.

[Gray Fox]

Mourinho donned by Rangers.