May: Only a month (and a bit) until GOOD football!

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Mainoo is a fucking hero.

[Manc]

Bruno with eyes in the back of his head.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

We're fucking back lads.

[Gray Fox]

United having a better season than Arsenal after all that's gone on would be lol.

[Kikó]

Unbelievable half. Baldy has nailed the game plan.

[Lewis]

The best centre-back partnership in the league is BACK.

[Kikó]

Look forward to seeing them play next season.

[Gray Fox]

This result would take Europe away from Newcastle would it not?

[Shindig]

Aye but this is genuinely funny. United could win this by a couple more.

[Ben]

Why?

Fuck knows. This is hilarious.

[phonics]

Why are people saying Doku is good. He makes Pepe look like a quality purchase.

[Waffdon]

Conference league should be fun. First team to win all the major European competitions?

[Shindig]

Coventry could've beaten this City side. They've been toothless.

[Giggles]

City must have been on the piss since they won't the league.

[phonics]

It's not a particularly new thought but I'm not sure how the Haaland penalty shot is 'Great Strength from Mainoo' and then what Akanji did is 'Great Forward Play by Hojlund' just because one happened at a corner. I realise the irony in an Arsenal fan complaining about rules being different at corners.

[Shindig]

Too little, too late.

[Magic]

:harold:

[Lofty]

Onana :D

[Gray Fox]

Too little, too late.

Wait for the 9 added minutes.

[Danny]

How are you letting Doku do the only thing he ever does and get a shot away? Then Onana :face:

[Lewis]

Fantastic. Can't be sacking baldy now come on lads.

[randomlegend]

If we somehow end up scamming City in the final and so winning more than Liverpool (FA cup > League cup) in Klopp's last season it'll be fucking hilarious.


:lol:

:swing:

[John Arne]

Enjoy the Thursday nights, lads. It's a proper pain in the arse.

[Dark Soldier]

Major trophy won. Better season than Arsenal, Liverpool, Newcastle, Chelsea.

YANITED YANITED.

[Shindig]

Thursdays off. :cool: / :moop:

[Danny]

They cant weasel out of that Rodri not losing record anymore either.

[Gray Fox]

It's all just a little bit of history repeating.

[Manc]

Varane coming out of retirement to win another major honour.

[Kikó]

FUCKING HELL. KOBIE FUCKING MAINOO.

dots

[phonics]

Ten Hag setting in a winning mentality to this lot. You can't sack him now.

[Lewis]

:swing:

De-railing Liverpool's season was trophy enough, and then they go and win an actual one. I'm just happy for Jonny Evans.

[Giggles]

Lol at Fernandes pretending he cares.

[Spikey M]

Lol at city

[randomlegend]

Lol at Fernandes pretending he cares.

:cab:

[Ben]

Mainoo is mustard like.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Get fucked City.

[Magic]

De-railing Liverpool's season was trophy enough, and then they go and win an actual one. I'm just happy for Jonny Evans.

I actually had to double take. I can't believe he's still playing.

[Kikó]

You could arguably call him our player of the season

[Kikó]

Mad to think that would have been Coventry winning it if it wasn't for var.

[Danny]

Nice to know Malacia isnt dead.

[Ian]

73% possession for 4 shots on target. :drool:

Get fucked,, Pep.

[randomlegend]

I only just realised Taz got banned and hasn't come back after it expired.

He's such a tragic, flouncing little gimp :D

[Giggles]

I only just realised Taz got banned and hasn't come back after it expired.

He's such a tragic, flouncing little gimp :D

Joke he, or anyone else, was banned at all.

[Kikó]

He posted a picture of dead children.

[Giggles]

I forgot you're on a power trip with these things.

[Shindig]

It's a public forum. You've got to draw the line somewhere.

[Kikó]

I forgot you're on a power trip with these things.

I didn't see the post.

[Giggles]

It's a public forum. You've got to draw the line somewhere.

So what about Harold then? Fucking place dead and this fanny running around on a crusade.

[Kikó]

I didn't ban Taz.

[igor_balis]

If those dead children were working from home he'd understand

[Giggles]

If those dead children were working from home he'd understand

You've had the breakdown, time to let it go now. The adults weren't even talking about that.

[igor_balis]

It was a joke grandad

[Danny]

Sounds like Kiko banned Taz. Its all his fault.

[Gray Fox]

What a season from Leverkusen too. Just capped off the double.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Ban them Keeks.

[randomlegend]

I banned Taz.

[niko_cee]

Hopefully someone from United came out and said City lacked the mental fortitude to get the win in such a high pressure game.

Going to make the Sirs look daft when they sack Erik as even though they've been biblically shit under his management for the most part, they have also, somehow, won 2 trophies which is a clear overachievement.

Not sure it qualifies as a better season than top 4 in the modern game given the accountants but the game is about winning stuff.

[randomlegend]

Genuinely don't think the decision has yet been made on the manager. I wouldn't be shocked to see Ten Hag stay and I also still think he can succeed.

Just needs someone competent to tell him no when he wants the club to drop 100m on Antony.

[Waffdon]

It’s gonna be De Zerbi. Fuck sake.

Goals galore at both ends again it is

[Magic]

This is another awful final performance.

[Waffdon]

Falling apart again :drool:

[Magic]

I think we'd fallen apart long before now. But that's it for the next few seasons now. Mid table mediocrity.

[Manc]

The best decision Leeds can make in the summer is to get rid of thier Welsh contingent. Not a single brain cell between them.

[Gray Fox]

I'm sure Gray was the youth Liverpool were taking a good look at last year. I reckon a buy and loan back for a year wouldn't be a bad deal there. Our homegrown contingent needs a boost at the least.

[Magic]

The best decision Leeds can make in the summer is to get rid of thier Welsh contingent. Not a single brain cell between them.

They were solid before that fucking international calamity.

[phonics]

Pep arranging to quit a couple months before the 115 charges come in seems incredibly innocent.

[Baz]

I'm sure Gray was the youth Liverpool were taking a good look at last year. I reckon a buy and loan back for a year wouldn't be a bad deal there. Our homegrown contingent needs a boost at the least.

He’s outrageously good on FM.

[randomlegend]

It’s gonna be De Zerbi. Fuck sake.

Goals galore at both ends again it is

1794854628057829709

Or not.

[Waffdon]

Maresca isn’t even the cheap option as he costs near enough £10m. :sick:

[Gray Fox]

Sounds like Ten Haag didn't save himself with the cup win.

[randomlegend]

All the journalists who are good for United are still saying no decision is yet made.

Seems they plan to sit down and give proper consideration to all their options, including keeping Ten Hag.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Believe there's a group board meeting scheduled for 3 August, a memorandum will be circulated to shareholders shortly thereafter.

[Gray Fox]

"The Leicester Manager" has seemingly won the poisoned chalice.

[Waffdon]

At least it’s not De Zerbi.

:|

[Adramelch]

I mean bald managers won the league and both cups so it's clearly the way to go.

[Shindig]

I know Klopp's been gone a few days but it's a bit harsh to call him bald.

[Adramelch]

I might have defaulted to City winning the League Cup, that's how much value I give to it I guess.

[Ben]

He’d definitely be bald and toothless if the Turks didn’t intervene.

[randomlegend]

McKenna staying at Ipswich and signing a new deal.

[Gray Fox]

He wears those caps for a reason.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Who would have thought we'd be rejected by a current Ipswich manager.

[Shindig]

This time next year he could be managing Bayern.

[Waffdon]

Who would have thought we'd be rejected by a current Ipswich manager.

Only wanted Chels. Fair play to the bloke.

(Think he rejected Brighton, not sure Man Utd were ever after him).

Potter back to Brighton to relegate them. Beautiful

[Jimmy Floyd]

Maybe you'll get him next year after a year's megaleague experience and for this year either keep baldie, or sign some comedy stopgap. Southgate.

[Jimmy Floyd]

As for Maresca, he is literally a pound shop Pep isn't he? He even dresses up and grooms like him.

[Giggles]

Leicester would be a decent job if he does go.

[niko_cee]

Pretty sure a pot plant could have got Leicester promoted so you can definitely see the data driven process thinking at work

[Jimmy Floyd]

The fact that all their reputed 'shortlists' seemed exclusively to contain coaches from the bottom half of the Prem and top half of the Championship signals that they probably fancy doing it on the cheap. Got to save the proper money for the 'front office'.

[Waffdon]

It’s not the cheap option though. He’s costing £10m and whatever his back room staff cost.

Worst part it means Sanchez will be back in goal

[phonics]

The fact that all their reputed 'shortlists' seemed exclusively to contain coaches from the bottom half of the Prem and top half of the Championship signals that they probably fancy doing it on the cheap. Got to save the proper money for the 'front office'.

Probably easier to convince a bin man to shut up and concentrate on the important part, making the 'xGA Minus Penalties' graph go up.

[SincereTheRebel]

Players with at least 10 goals and assists across the major leagues

22G - 11A - Cole Palmer
19G - 13A - Ollie Watkins
18G - 10A - Mohamed Salah
17G - 10A - Son
11G - 11G - Florian Wirtz
11G - 10A - Antony Gordon
10G - 13A - Alex Grimaldo

Does this mean the prem really is, a farmers league?

[Baz]

One of those things is not like the others.

[phonics]

1795370318351229079

[randomlegend]

1795425560484798708

Five year deal, absolutely deranged :D

[niko_cee]

Sacked within 12 months.

De Zerbi would have made more sense seeing as he's already worked with half their squad and would have cost nothing.

[Jimmy Floyd]

He's bald
He's ...
He took the Foxes top
Maresca, Maresca

[wullie]

Every time I looked last season Leicester fans wanted rid so if they've got a big fee for him they'll be delighted.

[Adramelch]

Sacked within 12 months.

De Zerbi would have made more sense seeing as he's already worked with half their squad and would have cost nothing.

And has been the actual manager of a club for more than 7 hours.

[Waffdon]

Sacked within 12 months.

De Zerbi would have made more sense seeing as he's already worked with half their squad and would have cost nothing.

Just Colwill and Caicedo I’m sure. Don’t think he had cucurella unless it was for a small period. I’m glad it’s not him anyway. Fuckkkk that.

Mon the Leicester manager

[-james-]

Leicester were worse than they should have been this season. Proper clown shit from Chelsea.

[Magic]

They sure do love paying compensation.

[Waffdon]

Leicester were worse than they should have been this season. Proper clown shit from Chelsea.

XG kings. You should love him.

[Luke Emia]

Sounds like Sir Jim is having another old man shouts at cloud kind of a day.

I wonder if he is getting the same PR advice as Mike Ashley used to get.

[Kikó]

I think he's probably old school and it is just showing. Mike Ashley unsurprisingly also has a very strict work from office only policy.

[John Arne]

This is a strangely interesting read. A guy recently started posting summaries of the 115 charges and just providing decent analysis of everything. That's it.

Then suddenly Nick Harris, who has also been on the case for 10yrs, gets his nose out of joint big time, and comes across as a massive bellend in the exchange.

Lads, you're on the same side.

1795748365231075794

[Dan]

Not confident about this one as a Fiorentina follower. They're a very functional team but I'm not sure there are a lot of reliable goalscorers, so outside of a Biraghi set piece there might be a lot of pressure on Nico to put in a big game.

[Magic]

Good game so far.

[Dan]

Where that Atalanta performance against Leverkusen was the sort of showing that they only produce around once per month, this Fiorentina performance so far is exactly what they're like most of the time. If anyone in the team could score they'd a legit Europa League calibre team, but Conference League is definitely more their level at the moment.

[Adramelch]

That finish by Bonaventura was especially telling. It's not like he should have definitely scored, but he barely troubled the keeper.

[Magic]

I love how unphysical and unpowerful these teams are. Very tidy, slick and creative. Fuck the EPL.

[CJay]

Yes, it’s also great not having goal kicks played backwards.

[Dan]

Not sure letting a guy who had to be helped off the pitch after a clash of heads carry on playing is following concussion protocols, but okay.

[Adramelch]

Yeah I was about to post the same thing. That looks dodgy as fuck.

[Adramelch]

The greek commentator just said something like "140 out of the 410 goals of the competition have been scored between the 46th and 75th minutes of the games". So basically 1/3rd of the goals have been scored during this 1/3rd of the games. Insightful.

[Shindig]

Newcastle released Karius, Dummett, Ritchie, Hendrick and Watts today. That last one has 'late-career Gateshead move' written all over him. Paul Dummett needs a glittering testimonial against an all star XI.

[Adramelch]

That's two very clear yellow cards so far for Dodo but none given.

[Dan]

Not even remotely surprising that this has gone to extra time, it was just a question of whether it would be 0-0 or 1-1

[Dan]

Olympiakos looking the more likely & the more deserving to win it before penalties. Fiorentina are generally solid in the middle of defence, and both Milenkovic & LMQ have played well, along with Terracciano in goal. Ikone feels like the player most likely to pull something out the bag for Fiorentina - he's a typical inconsistent dribbly boy, but it's only really him & Nico that could just create a goal from nothing.

As has been mentioned on the broadcast, Fiorentina have been absolutely godawful at penalties this season, so you'd have to imagine they'll be trying to get it done in the final 15mins.

[Adramelch]

I thought the game was fairly even for the 90, but Olympiakos definitely looked the better of the two in extra time. Helps that they've had 10 days or so to rest I guess.

The defenders on both sides have been stellar.

[Magic]

I've thought Fiorentina looked the better side lol.

[Adramelch]

On that second half they've been much better.

[Dan]

Yeah, that was pretty much the exact script I would've put down before the game. I said 2-1aet in the hope we'd get some more action, but sadly we got the scrappier version of the same game.

[Adramelch]

El Kaabi should just take the trophy home at this point. 11 goals in 9 knockout games is bonkers.

[Magic]

That was needlessly long, fucking hell. Would have been ultra harsh to rule that out.

[Bam]

Its happening again, its happening again, Florentina, its happening again.

[Lewis]

Congratulations Adramelch.

[Magic]

Huh, I always thought it was Adam.

[igor_balis]

He's bald
He's ...
He took the Foxes top
Maresca, Maresca

It's amazing the stuff that sticks with you, considering I prob only saw him play about ten times about 25 years ago, but I know for a fact that the Albion went with the more route one
EN ZO MA RE SCA
clap clap clap clap clap
EN ZO MA RE SCA
clap clap clap clap clap

#igormakeseverythingaboutblairerawestbrom

[Dan]

Time is probably right for Italiano to go make the move he's been angling for. The Fiorentina team needs a pretty decent overhaul as there just isn't much quality in the team as it stands - it's a bunch of solid veterans who will work hard & do what they're told, plus Nico, who's a really talented player but he's not exactly an elite player either.

Striker is obviously the huge priority - as someone who owns an Arthur Cabral shirt I can't help but feel he was the sort of striker that might've been more useful tonight. I'd imagine they'll look at someone from the bottom half of Serie A again like they did with N'Zola last year - someone like Andrea Pinamonti from relegated Sassuolo seems like their kind of thing - but maybe that would change with a new manager. There has been talk of Alberto Gilardino from Genoa taking the job if Italiano leaves, so if he brought Albert Gudmundsson with him that would be nice.

Nico will probably go, so a replacement there will be needed, and Kouame might leave as he's out of contract, but Ikone & Sottil are decent enough to start if they don't bring in someone established. Bonaventura & Castrovilli are both out of contract in the summer, and while they're capable it might be smarter to move on & try to refresh the midfield a bit. Not sure if we'll have Arthur or Amrabat next year, but I'd really like a bit more dynamism in the midfield. I'd be interested in someone like Mathias Soule on loan from Juve next season as he was excellent for Frosinone despite them going down.

I'm totally fine with Dodo, Kayode, Biraghi & Parisi at fullback, although I'd imagine people will be sniffing around Kayode in the window. Milenkovic, Martinez Quarta & Luca Ranieri are all pretty steady defenders, but if a new manager comes in who wants to play more progressive stuff I'm not sure any of them are anything more than adequate on the ball. Terracciano is a solid enough keeper, and they have a couple of promising kids who will hopefully be the long term answer, so no worries there, but the owner is richer than anyone else is the league (until Como show up & blow everyone else away, anyway) & has just forked out for state of the art training facilities, so there's got to be some expectation of progress in the next few years, which seems unlikely with things as they stand.

[phonics]

Doesn't matter how many times it comes up, a Serie A manager called Italiano always gets a chuckle. Like if PES was real life.

[Baz]

So Endrick is off to Madrid, Estevao is Chelsea bound. Has anyone picked up the third lad yet? I'll just pencil in Barcelona if not.

Brentford apparently

[wullie]

Doesn't matter how many times it comes up, a Serie A manager called Italiano always gets a chuckle. Like if PES was real life.

Even though he played for the Italian national team I still refuse to believe Kevin Lasagna is a real person.

[Ian]

https://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/football/articles/c04484jemk0o


"My mentality is that I never haven't ever worked for a top club in my head," Kompany said.

"A top club is the environment you create. It's the mentality you have towards your job in good and bad times, that's what defines working at the top level."

I'm sure this'll save him if they don't win a thing.

"But guys, isn't the real league title the top mentality we displayed along the way? "

[Manc]

A truly bizarre appointment.

[Adramelch]

It's the Xabi Alonso effect. We'll see a couple more before they inevitably start massively failing.

[Lewis]

Isn't it just anyone associated with 'Pep' getting jobs like how Sir Alex Ferguson connections used to? Bayern is a bit of a stretch admittedly.

[Ian]

I mean he gets more of a bye than another relegated manager because they'll see him as a relatively glamourous name and He Knows How To Win At The Top Level because he was a big name player. Couple that with some of the big name clubs who need a manager losing their mind because they can't figure out who the next crop of elite managers is going to be and you've got Bayern hiring Kompany, Chelsea getting a bloke who came second in a Pep lookalike contest and United/whoever else supposedly sniffing about McKenna because he's had a good year in the Championship.

Not to mention the Barca / Xavi stuff.

[Adramelch]

He also made the Belgian Cup final once with Anderlecht, and you can't quite overlook such levels of success.

[Giggles]

I'd never think a whole pile of most professional or high level sports people as a fan type, but I love this man.

https://pca.st/0s38pc0m

[randomlegend]

https://www.fantacalcio.it/news/calcio-italia/29_05_2024/napoli-punti-461611

Napoli's 2024 Serie A season was the worst performance ever by a reigning champion: 10th place, 53 points in 38 games. They did worse than Torino's 49/50 season (but the whole Torino squad had died the previous summer and had to be replaced)

That's an amazing 'stat' :lol:

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

RIP Torino.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

https://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/football/articles/c2jjmn7ex4vo

lol.

[Baz]

Some said: 'what’s the point? Yes I’m a millionaire but I don’t even have time to spend the money'.:happycry:

[Jimmy Floyd]

They must be some of the most time rich people on earth. What do they work, 2-3 hours most days?

It's also only the top few hundred players, the ones really paid the huge bucks, who play that many games. Most professional footballers play 30-40 a year tops.

[John Arne]

Mourinho in at Fenerbache. Quite the career trajectory.

[Dan]

They must be some of the most time rich people on earth. What do they work, 2-3 hours most days?

It's also only the top few hundred players, the ones really paid the huge bucks, who play that many games. Most professional footballers play 30-40 a year tops.

Surely they're doing more than 3hrs a day?

In my head the big teams are doing 2-3hrs just on the pitch every day, as well as gym work, recovery work, film study/meetings, and then some will be working with private coaches on the side & the big names will probably have some regular media/community commitments as well.

[John Arne]

What's the craic for the Euro's?

One mega thread seems the best option, or just stick it all in the monthly's? The days of separate group threads are surely long gone....

[Baz]

Let Ian decide.

Stick a plug for this euros competition (https://lastmanballing.com) in the OP, would you? :baz:

[Magic]

Surely Group Stages, followed by Knockout Stages, followed by THE FINAL.

[Ben]

Is this Will Still a bit of a fraud then? Seems Reims' form went to shit after he did the stupid High Performance podcast and he left a month ago, now the only club he's been linked with is Sunderland.

[Jimmy Floyd]

I'm thinking of starting the Low Performance Podcast in order to boost the careers of unpretentious sportspeople.

[Ian]

What's the craic for the Euro's? .

One mega thread seems the best option, or just stick it all in the monthly's? The days of separate group threads are surely long gone....

Recent years we've settled on one for the group stage and one for the knockouts I think


Let Ian decide.

Stick a plug for this euros competition (https://lastmanballing.com) in the OP, would you? :baz:

Just remind me when I inevitably forget and I'll edit it in.

[Pepe]

One thread should be enough.

All TOP players should strike and the teams should bring back retired players to play in their place. 90s revival. :drool:

[Ian]

One thread should be enough.

It should, but if some of these weirdos had their way it'd be all sorts.

Frankly the normal monthly football thread would probably cover it these days.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Frankly the normal monthly football thread would probably cover it these days.

The Euros stuff would be lost among the massive excitement for Man Utd and Chelsea playing each other and Wrexham in pre-season friendlies, best have its own thread to give the tournament a chance.

[Lofty]

We need a thread for each group, obviously.

[Pepe]

For each match.

[Ben]

Do a thread with a poll for how many threads we want for the tournament.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

For each match.
Each half of every match.

[Ian]

With an accompanying thread for discussion of xG during said half.

[Ian]

Maybe a VAR one as well.

[Ben]

There's more chat in this thread about how many threads we want than what we'll actually get during the tournament.

[SincereTheRebel]

Where is the pre-thread about the pre-squads? Who is in and who is staying at home?

[John Arne]

One thread, outside of the monthly's. I wanted to reread our reactions to Erikson's drama, took my ages to find as it's lost inside a monthly.
#BareFacts

[Ian]

There's more chat in this thread about how many threads we want than what we'll actually get during the tournament.

Last couple of tournaments I'd done a poll but fuck it. People can like it or do the threads themselves. Which they won't, so lumping it it is. :nodd:

[Waffdon]

Don’t even give it even give it a special title. June football thread followed by July football thread.

[Ian]

I mean if it was up to me we'd just have one forever called The Football Thread but people aren't ready for that sort of thinking / wet their pants trying to use the search function.

[Jimmy Floyd]

The monthly threads are good, a forever one would be very much David Mitchell football football all the football territory.

[SincereTheRebel]

One thread, outside of the monthly's. I wanted to reread our reactions to Erikson's drama, took my ages to find as it's lost inside a monthly.
#BareFacts

Didnt know people actuall go backwards and read past stuff. Similar to all those pictures the world seems to take. Nobody goes back to look at those moments.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

I mean if it was up to me we'd just have one forever called The Football Thread but people aren't ready for that sort of thinking / wet their pants trying to use the search function.

You're a monster.

[Giggles]

That would be the correct way. There’s tumbleweed most EPL game weeks anyway.

[Manc]

Tournament thread - Deutschland 24.

[niko_cee]

The real question is where on earth is the TRANSFER THREAD so we can all start lolling at the sensible football people now in charge at United who are going to try to buy that [quite possibly useless for a proper team] Branthwaite kid for half of what Everton want for him. It'll be the summer of Sancho all over again. Them being linked with Chalobah as well, no lessons learnt from Mount.

[SincereTheRebel]

Slacking