September: Transfers! Southend! FOUR GAMES!!!!!!!!

[Waffdon]

£1bn spend and Conor Gallagher trotting out as captain. These two things should not go together.

Caicedo/Lavia/Chukwuemka/Nkunku are all injured. That’s 4 people he’s either behind or fighting out with for a renaming spot of midfield 3. The team is obviously not great for the money spent on it. Manager has still been a bit useless. Still has good players albeit young and inexperienced.

[Lofty]

That offside :D

[John Arne]

Why did the ref stop the play for a fairly soft leg injury?

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Saliba looked like a right fanny there.

[Don]

This poor Beto lad is gonna get done dirty by some cunt ref and some gamesmanship given he likes a wrestle and his natural arm height meets square with defender's heads. My money is on Newcastle cunts to get him sent off.

Mon the Everton winner here, hardest thing in the game is scoring and Arsenal look lacking in that department, especially without Martinelli.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

1703447375120138687

:cool:

[Luke Emia]

After watching this shite I see why Everton fans are so angry all the time now.

[Baz]

*Goodison seethe

[niko_cee]

Wait, Caicedo is injured?

Place is cursed.

[niko_cee]

1703447375120138687

:cool:

The Greenwood. The.

[Waffdon]

Wait, Caicedo is injured?

Place is cursed.

Think he was just back too late from international games but not sure. Had a knock when playing for Ecuador but played through it.

Lavia done his ankle though

[John Arne]

Yellow for each victim?

1703610828635660744

[Jimmy Floyd]

Such admiration for the referee's card speed. In England that would be 14 players protesting and a 40-second think.

[Waffdon]

Star Boy Hudson Odoi is back :wub:

[SincereTheRebel]

Yellow for each victim?

1703610828635660744

Ive watched this a good ten times, and i cant stop laughing :lol:

[Don]

https://www.nytimes.com/2023/09/17/sports/soccer/premier-league-pickup-game.html

Cute.

[John Arne]

Al-Hilal need a 100th minute equaliser to draw at home to mighty Navbahor in the AFC Champions League.

[Don]

Reports of a dressing room bustup between the favela fucks and the gammons on the eve of a Bayern raping. This is gonna be a cracking period up until egghead's sacking.

[niko_cee]

United to mug them on the break.

[Waffdon]

Celtic have recorded a profit of £40m for the past year and yet the Scottish papers will try make out the disparity between them and European teams is too much for them to do anything.

Even tried to make out Feyenoord were dwarfing them in terms of money :lol:

[Don]

Net profit doesn't mean much if it's all got to go towards subsidising the fact they're a small little club (if that's the case). Wage bills are the better indicator but they seemingly have double Feyenoord's.

[Spikey M]

Southend United update: we have one substitute for tonight's game.

1704138958320366066?t=9jMQIEbNqU7ml2IJTLJDQw&s=19

Not taking my son to this one. It's a school night and it's starting to feel like it might be abuse at this stage.

[Waffdon]

Be a good learning experience for him. Get the tennis balls out

[Kikó]

United to mug them on the break.

I don't even think we're that much of a counter attacking side either

[Jimmy Floyd]

Counter-attack is yesterday's plan. United are all about defending on the break.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Just looked at the teams having had no awareness of Milan for a while. Newcastle should win this at a canter really.

Have we reached peak bald manager? Feels like it's spreading.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Longstaff is a mong.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

That would have been a quality goal if Leao hadn't shat his pants at the end.

[Shindig]

I can't say I'm enjoying this.

[Offshore Toon]

This is the first matching this season I decided to sit down and properly watch but I didn't make 20 mins.

Champ League, even with Jacob Murphy, is pants. Bring on the knockouts.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Bring on the Swiss System, more like.

[Gray Fox]

The new big group does seem like it keeps things more interesting and keeps teams putting out good sides in the final game or two.

[Waffdon]

Newcastle are gonna finish around the same places as Chelsea this season. Already had a meh start and will not improve with CL every other week

[Jimmy Floyd]

Their game management there was horrendous. Fortunately the Chelsea rejects XI had the composure of Vesuvius in 79 AD.

[Offshore Toon]

Selling ASM was mental. Not saying he'd have won that, but you need a wildcard who defenders are terrified of. Harvey fucking Barnes is not that.

This season comes with zero pressure anyway. Gives a taste of what's to come whilst we revel in the big time and Eddie realises his white man racist tactics aren't enough alone.

[niko_cee]

Feels like a bad year inbound for the coefficient [both Uniteds are just awful and let's be honest, Arsenal will go nowhere either] at the worst possible time [what with the extra place for next year on offer] so it's all on the wafer cup mob to pull through.

[Shindig]

Agreed. That energy Saint-Maximin brings is really missed.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Crvena Zvezda :drool:

Lovely finish.

[Waffdon]

Celtic just can’t be a serious club playing Joe Hart in Europe.

[Manc]

Well played.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Celtic :harold:

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Provedel :cool:

Lovely header from the keeper.

1704238233565929535

[phonics]

Clearing the ball in the last minute and doing it horizontally and not even hitting the throw in line...

Simeone is going to have him gargling his balls for a month.

[Adramelch]

Provedel :cool:

Lovely header from the keeper.

1704238233565929535

It's not even just the header. He was the only one that made a forward movement in preparation for that cross.

[Don]

Every club with the means to afford Joao Felix has failed the sport by allowing a broke-ass Barca to acquire him for free and, in turn, secure the club's future for the next decade. But obviously a massive special lol at Chelsea, Utd and Arsenal for missing out.

Reminds me of when they signed Ronaldinho during a time when if I recall correctly, they were struggling.

[Jimmy Floyd]

He's the footballing equivalent of fake tits.

[Lofty]

Why would Arsenal sign him?

Also, didn't Atleti concede late equalisers last year too? Becoming a trademark.

[Don]

Arsenal would sign him because he'a an elite attacker capable of world class creativity and that's something they desperately lack as evidenced by their pathetic xG this season.

[Lofty]

Not like they don't already have too many players for that position though.

[Don]

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/F6eX29uXkAAOieA?format=jpg&name=medium

[-james-]

"OMARlFORSON"?

[-james-]

Bonucci turning out for Union Berlin is an odd one

[niko_cee]

Is that just all of United's available players? If not, why have they named 4 keepers? Has Ten Hag seen Arteta's interview and thought he can 1 [or even 2] up that?

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Dan Gore :cool:

What a name.

[Jimmy Floyd]

I thought Union Berlin would be better than this, it's like watching Real Madrid play Rosenborg. Holding out so far though.

[Waffdon]

Bellingham loves a last minute winner. That must be about the 3rd or 4th so far

[phonics]

Sounds like a Taz post but there being a bloke called 'Sambo' on the PSV bench got a chuckle.

[Jimmy Floyd]

On a similar theme, Steve McManaman was falling over himself to correct a slip of the tongue earlier when he named 'left black' among the positions David Alaba could play.

[Waffdon]

Tuchel’s obsession with not playing an actual right back at right back is properly weird.

Nkunku at PSG, Chalobah and Loftus Cheek at Chelsea and now Laimer here.

[phonics]

Arsenal are so fucking back and it has such an overall effect on my mental health. I don't think I've ever been more wrong about a player than Trossard.

[Giggles]

Might have been on to something with all the keepers.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Fucking Onana.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Game over.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Say what you like about Massimo Taibi but he didn't cost £60 million.

[phonics]

Fucking Onana.

Maybe he should shout at Maguire some more.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Musiala pulled Dalot's pants down and it was nice that no one bothered to mark Gnabry.

[Waffdon]

Arsenal are so fucking back and it has such an overall effect on my mental health. I don't think I've ever been more wrong about a player than Trossard.

:lol:

[Gray Fox]

At least he can kick the ball well though.

[phonics]

https://i.imgflip.com/61taua.jpg

[phonics]

:lol:

Arsenal in Europe are 1/5th of the way there to beating Chelsea's win total for the year based off this match.

[thommo]

I don't think you can proclaim Arsenal are back when, in their only game so far against competent opposition, they struggled to a 2-2 draw at home against 10 men.

[phonics]

I don't think you can proclaim Arsenal are back when, in their only game so far against competent opposition, they struggled to a 2-2 draw at home against 10 men.

This sort of salty posting is confirmation that we're back. :drool: Clubs been an absolute joke filled with frauds for a decade and now people trying to say we're shit because we dropped 2 points to a set piece.

[Waffdon]

Arsenal in Europe are 1/5th of the way there to beating Chelsea's win total for the year based off this match.

Nice trophy bro

[Dark Soldier]

Onana is an incredible keeper for a side like City. Ping it about to players who actually move for the ball, if you make a mistake your side has scored 5 anyway.

For a team like this it's the equivalent of putting your fat mate in net cos he can do 50 keepy uppies.

[Don]

God, I love this game :lol:

[phonics]

Last time Chelsea won a trophy you were chatting about a Dundee derby. Stick to twitter arguments with @UTDTrey and screenshotting transfermarkt you little worm. I’ll be over here enjoying things.

[Dark Soldier]

phonics getting absolutely owned here g'wan waff you deviant fuck

[phonics]

I'd say I hope one of your kebabs gives you heart disease but I don't actually believe it.

[Waffdon]

Last time Chelsea won a trophy you were chatting about a Dundee derby. Stick to twitter arguments with @UTDTrey and screenshotting transfermarkt you little worm. I’ll be over here enjoying things.

Chelsea won the tournament you’re currently creaming yourself over being in - for the first time in about six years no less - in 2021 mate. Two years ago.

I’m glad you’re not taking it to heart, though. Do tell me more about this ‘Utd Trey’ character.

[phonics]

Chelsea won the tournament you’re currently creaming yourself over being in - for the first time in about six years no less - in 2021 mate. Two years ago.

Am going to amortise me forgetting this fact over the next decade.

[Waffdon]

That’s some powerful stuff you’re on. Take it easy, my guy.

[-james-]

I don't think Kane at Bayern will ever feel right. Like when you give up on your 10 season lower league project to take over Real Madrid on FM.

[Jimmy Floyd]

It's like Olivia Coleman in Hollywood. Yes, dear, you deserve it and all, but it's not you.

[Spikey M]

Man Utd's midfield has an average age of 76.

[phonics]

Where's fucking "Don" so I can shit all over his Odegaard takes while I'm here. :drool:

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

You're only playing PSV...

[phonics]

You're only playing PSV...

Quiet now. You spent half of last year with Luuk De Jongs understudy up front.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Casemiro :cool:

[Don]

What's that, milky bar kid finally does something and it's against the Eredivisie shite he made his name from? That's that debate settled.

[phonics]

1704605452347036064

"Well what happened is I shit myself but did you see the 14 yard pass I made?"

[Spikey M]

I would like to hear more about how Onana is better than De Gea. :happycry:

RL?

[Lewis]

Has he made what you would call a good save for United yet? He will be getting monkey chants by February at this rate.

[John Arne]

England would have been frightening with a midfield of Bellingham + Musiala + Shitkicker.

[Don]

The thing is no one could have seen this coming. And plus, this is really only ETH's first month in charge if you accept that the previous squads weren't really his players. Some backing in Jan to sign Russell Brand and bed in Diallo and Pellistri and we can then look to judge.

[John Arne]

1704723682227097700

[Lofty]

I don't think you can proclaim Arsenal are back when, in their only game so far against competent opposition, they struggled to a 2-2 draw at home against 10 men.

This is correct although the caveat there is Arteta was being weird with his selection then. I think the team that started against PSV last night would have battered Fulham. Having Jesus back and not playing Partey at right back make a huge difference, Raya on his second consecutive clean sheet too :eyemouth:

[Baz]

I wonder if he’s doing what I did with TTH FC where Luca and Lofty rotated, losing their spot if they conceded a goal.

[Spikey M]

1704723682227097700

1704729262794608760?t=CnndjyiXH01rqGNX8nFQpA&s=19

https://i.ibb.co/7Nj7J1N/download-1.jpg

[Kikó]

Forgot to leave Oktoberfest and missed the game. Beer was good though.

[Ben]

"If sportswashing is going to increase my GDP by 1%, then we'll continue doing sportswashing," Bin Salman said.

He told Fox News: "I don't care [about the term]. I have 1% growth in GDP from sport and I am aiming for another 1.5%.

"Call it what you want - we are going to get that 1.5%."

No fucks given. :D

[Giggles]

A Kelleher sighting in the wild bejaysus. They should get the group out of the reserves at least.

[Gray Fox]

Doak also being unleashed. Not a right back to be seen, which suggests to me Goe Jomez is being saved for the weekend.

[Don]

Doak alongside so many first-teamers is gonna be absolutely incredible viewing. Tune in for a very early glimpse of the next Messi.

[Giggles]

That's him fucked then.

[Gray Fox]

He seems to get the ball and just run at his man all the time, which is great as players are mostly coached into the boring and safe pass inside as they get older.

[Manc]

What a hit.

[Don]

Tsimikas is fucking turd.

[Gray Fox]

Stinker of a half for Tsimikas. Can definitely tell this is a bunch of lads making their first starts of the season. Very much liking seeing Gravenberch get the ball and turn to run it forwards.

[Jimmy Floyd]

This competition really started with Sevilla's 1-1 home draw with Lens last night. They're moving already.

[Gray Fox]

After comfortably beating much inferior European opposition it is my duty to bullishly inform you all that Liverpool are BACK.

[Don]

They're gonna strip the Diaz off Benjamin Brereton and send the useless gammon back to brexitball sharpish or else he's gonna relegate Villarreal.

[Pen]

Not to brag Jimmy_Floyd but I saw Baba Rahman live today and it was majestic. Don't think many Chelsea fans can say the same (even witholding the majestic part).

[Jimmy Floyd]

I'm glad to know he's a real person, and not just an accounting trick. Him and mercurial Dutchman Kuk Zebuchs sharing our left side for a few years there.

[Shindig]

It'll be like the Shawshank Redemption. He existed on paper until someone walked through the door.

Did he speak with a Russian accent and have a bit of stubble?

[wullie]

Charly Musonda must have him beat for time spent at club vs games played for club

[John Arne]

Never realised that Warnock had managed quite so many games. 1,890 in mental.

https://gyazo.com/44b23809e42ef12d7d3d54802c075dfb.jpeg

[Jimmy Floyd]

For my own, not-to-be-spoken of reasons, I was just reading through the Guardian live text of Chelsea 0 Besiktas 2 from the 2003-4 Champions League season (the one that ended with us limping out to Monaco in the semi-finals). Anyway, I found this entry:


15 mins: "The Guardian are covering the Chelsea and Man Ure games, but why not the Rangers game. Is it because we are Scottish, Huns or because we have no chance of qualifying?" asks Alan Gardner. To be honest Alan, it's a mixture of all three reasons. Along with a number of others that spring to mind, that involve bowler hats, lambeg drums and bulldog tattoos. Never mind, we'll be rooting for your blue-nosed boys when they take on Manchester United.

Can you imagine if they published that today? What an incredibly watered-down society we have become.

[Baz]

Today I heard football referred to as ‘no disability football.’ Thats gonna be the next thing isn’t it. John Spastic top England goal scorer with 112 in 44 games cos he’s deaf and playing against goalies with no hands, on Sky Sports graphics alongside Harry Kane and Ellen White.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Chelsea two legs two arms one penis side are bloody crap atm.

[Spikey M]

They might be the first disabled Premier Leage team.

[SincereTheRebel]

They dont need the chelsea op. Already come pre assembled.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Just turned Sky on and there's some completely straight-faced studio programme analysing this week's prospects in Fantasy Premier League. What the hell is happening to my country?

Ten years ago they did this but in the form of 'Merse' and that idiot Fenners having a laugh.

[Spikey M]

We're getting old Jim.

[Luke Emia]

Just turned Sky on and there's some completely straight-faced studio programme analysing this week's prospects in Fantasy Premier League. What the hell is happening to my country?

Ten years ago they did this but in the form of 'Merse' and that idiot Fenners having a laugh.

It’s fucking mad the amount of tv they get out of that shite nowadays.

[Jimmy Floyd]

In other heads have gone news, I've just heard the Serie A anthem for the first time. Blimey, lads, Zdenek Zeman wouldn't have stood for this.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PmPM3TLT_5E

[Shindig]

That's a bit royalty free Opera. Does the Premier League still have an anthem?

[phonics]

1705282302152945850

Between this and the 976 people attending Jordan Hendersons games. What a league.

[niko_cee]

Just turned Sky on and there's some completely straight-faced studio programme analysing this week's prospects in Fantasy Premier League. What the hell is happening to my country?

Ten years ago they did this but in the form of 'Merse' and that idiot Fenners having a laugh.

Yeah, FPL ownership stats leaking into the actual football coverage was a serious red flag.

Ahead of the curve in bailing from the game this year.

On the anthem front, was at Brighton last night, which was my first European game for 18 years, and it was a similar experience to my first Premier League game in 5 or 6 years when I went to Fulham in the late noughties and was confronted by Budweiser keg rucksack people and wall to wall TVs. Having adverts for Just Eat running constantly during halftime really added to the ambiance.

[Jimmy Floyd]

The conspiracy theory part of me thinks it must be some gateway drug plot by the gambling industry.

[Giggles]

Catching up to America. The sport is only a vehicle for the fantasy bollocks.

[Spikey M]

Today I heard football referred to as ‘no disability football.’ Thats gonna be the next thing isn’t it. John Spastic top England goal scorer with 112 in 44 games cos he’s deaf and playing against goalies with no hands, on Sky Sports graphics alongside Harry Kane and Ellen White.

1705512326659788901?t=DSNyWFI9hneqyST8r0F1pw&s=19

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Makes Pickford look extra mongy.

A shame they didn't get Kane to do it.

[Jimmy Floyd]

This Beto for Everton is a great watch. Proper old-fashioned lumbering carthorse centre forward. Probably grew up with a poster of Jan Koller on his bedroom wall.

[Luke Emia]

This Beto for Everton is a great watch. Proper old-fashioned lumbering carthorse centre forward. Probably grew up with a poster of Jan Koller on his bedroom wall.

I think the only way he could be a more Dyche player is if he was English.

[Jimmy Floyd]

VAR spent about 2.5 minutes there looking at completely the wrong replay for the Brentford equaliser, and nearly disallowed a perfectly good goal as a result. The conclusion you have to come to is that the geezers in the booth lack a proper education to be taking on this task.

[Luke Emia]

Old T-Rex arms could have done better with it as well.

[Waffdon]

I only noticed through FM that Beto and Chermiti are both 6ft3 and 6ft4 respectively. Dyche is just properly grim.

[Jimmy Floyd]

It's proper football. Fire it up to the big man. None of this poncy bollocks. Brentford fans slinking off for their vegan dinners.

[Waffdon]

That Man Utd back four is tremendous. It’s something you’d expect to see from Fulham or something.

[Kikó]

Look forward to people acting surprised that United starting a game with a lower half defence are somehow not very good.

[Lewis]

lol at Harry Kane barely celebrating his walking pace hat-trick and couple of assists. If he doesn't put the mother of all Fitness Advantages to good use for England after a season of pre-season then we know who to blame.

[Spikey M]

That Man Utd lineup is phenomenal :D

[Gray Fox]

I can't state how disappointed I am in Brentford.

Go and sort them out Taz.

[Dark Soldier]

We are so so shit its almost art at this point.

[Dark Soldier]

We're the best team in the world.

[Kikó]

Xavi Gammon Evans.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Evans and Bruno :cool:

[Ian]

1705670154082766951

Evans. :drool:

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Another defender injured :drool:

[Don]

Burnley are so lightweight. And that insistence on going back and recycling possession between CBs and GK must be a pain in the arse to watch when it kills so many attacks.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Man United ARE BACK.

[Gray Fox]

You can't claim that until you beat obviously inferior European opposition I'm afraid.

[Kikó]

Hannibal was really good tonight as well. Looking forward to his ultimate descent into mediocrity.

[niko_cee]

Still looking a bit grim for all the promoted sides.

[Dark Soldier]

Hannibal was really good tonight as well. Looking forward to his ultimate descent into mediocrity.

Aye if he can work on his final ball a bit (although that back heel was lovely) he could have a decent career

[Bam]

United fans getting all giddy over beating Burnley. :D

[Kikó]

Which forum are you reading that on?

[Jimmy Floyd]

giddyreddevils.org

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Bam SEETHING because he knows we are BACK.

[Spikey M]

Which forum are you reading that on?

Thethirdhalf.co.uk

[Gray Fox]

Liverpool: Alisson, Gomez, Matip, Van Dijk, Robertson, Mac Allister, Jones, Szoboszlai, Salah, Nunez, Diaz.

Subs: Kelleher, Endo, Konate, Gakpo, Elliott, Jota, Tsimikas, Gravenberch, Quansah.

West 'am: Areola, Coufal, Zouma, Aguerd, Emerson, Ward-Prowse, Alvarez, Soucek, Bowen, Paqueta, Antonio.

Subs: Fabianski, Fornals, Kudus, Cornet, Ings, Ogbonna, Benrahma, Kehrer, Mavropanos.


Looks like just all out attack continues. Good to see Nunez get the start he's earned. Considering Trent, Thiago and Bajcetic aren't in that squad too, I'd say the depth is starting to look great again. I'd hope we're in a position to get Gravenberch and Quansah on for some minutes, but given it's Moyes, there's a display of 10 men behind the ball incoming.
Guaranteed early goal for Jarred Bowen.

[Waffdon]

Thiago Silva still starting games, ya know. Get him in the fucking bin. Why is he the only bastard player immune to injuries.

[Gray Fox]

Liverpool all over the place early on(stop me if you've heard that before). Lucky we have Alisson.

[John Arne]

The female commentator on the feed I have is so fucking annoying - just criticizing every decision a player makes.

[John Arne]

Super Mo.

[Luke Emia]

Udogie is having a tough time of it to put it mildly.

[Spoonsky]

What a tackle that is.


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KCdT2SfLl7U

Re-name it.

[Spoonsky]

Ah shit.

Unfortunately that's a great goal.

[Gray Fox]

Bowen is exactly the type to be nailed on to score against a Liverpool.

A shame as we had got to grips with the constant niggly fouls and set piece hunting from them. Mac Alister not having his best game but again he is not a #6. I'd be surprised if it's long before Gravenberch gets on.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Harsh penalty award for me.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Jorginho :harold:

The most overrated player in the world.

[thommo]

Maddison with 2 more assists. Looking like one of the shrewdest summer buys.

[Spoonsky]

Feels like Nunez always aims right at the post. Produces some incredible finishes and some terrible misses.

[Gray Fox]

Feels like Nunez always aims right at the post. Produces some incredible finishes and some terrible misses.

Right on cue.

[Luke Emia]

Arsenal are BACK

[Spoonsky]

:cool:

I fucking love McAllister.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Nketiah is a lucky boy not to be walking.

[niko_cee]

Strong orange on that tackle.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

That could be a lengthy spell out for Maddison.

[Luke Emia]

Nketiah is a lucky boy not to be walking.

Aye very lucky. Didn’t even really get looked at.

As for the pen I think it’s a pen because it stops the ball going in the back of the net. If it’s on the penalty spot it’s not a pen. But, I think refs need to have a bit more leeway with what they give as handball.

[Waffdon]

And Thiago silva is at fault for another goal. I fucking hate the cunt. People still have the audacity to claim he’s good.

[John Arne]

I'll tell you what would be nice, if we actually tried to score a third goal to take the pressure off, rather than fuck around passing it sideways and backwards for 20 minutes.

[phonics]

I went out for a cigarette when Gary Neville was claming that Maddisons knee just exploded only to find him still on the pitch after I came back.

[Gray Fox]

Paqueta has made many a Liverpool player look silly today.

[Waffdon]

Paqueta has made many a Liverpool player look silly today.

Assumed Liverpool were losing based on the posts. Giggles is correct.

[niko_cee]

When can we start PochWatch?

Small Pocket Watch?

[phonics]

Fair result probably, shame that it was due to an absolutely unallowable cockup from Jorginho. Hope that Rice injury isn't too bad.

[Waffdon]

Whenever Silva drops dead as it’s unfair to start each game a man down.

[Spikey M]

When can we start PochWatch?

Small Pocket Watch?

He's on borrowed time, but I'm not sure who they get in to turn this around:

1705960938963116094?t=EsbSh13VIrmLzzPXNJSqCg&s=19

I don't understand how they can be this bad. That's relegation form.

[Don]

Paqueta has indeed seemingly dialled it up a notch this season to untackleable status.

The Hairy Hungarian continues to look so much quicker and stronger than everyone else and combined with his dirbbling and final ball, I'm not sure how we don't win the league this season and many more in the next decade.

[Spoonsky]

I don't understand how they can be this bad. That's relegation form.

Me neither. I thought they looked good against Liverpool in the opening week. What's happened / happening?

[randomlegend]

They signed Nicolas Jackson as their main striker, who - as previously proven - is complete dogshit.

[Waffdon]

Aside from Nkunku being dead, the biggest issue is he keeps playing players in their wrong positions. He’s had a centre back at left back, left back at left mid, an attacking mid/box to box as the deepest player and the player who should be in Gallagher position has been running about playing off the striker. Makes no sense whatsoever.

Wednesday should be better as I doubt Silva starts so that’s two positions sorted

[Don]

They signed Nicolas Jackson as their main striker, who - as previously proven - is complete dogshit.

How's that proof for Nunez coming along?

GAHAHAHAHAHAHA

[phonics]

He's on borrowed time, but I'm not sure who they get in to turn this around:

https://gumlet.assettype.com/tnm/import/sites/default/files/FrankLampard-facebook_24012023_1200.jpg

[Spikey M]

It's written in the stars.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Surely that's handball?

[Don]

How is that handball not being checked/given? Fuck me.

McAtee looks like a carbon copy of Foden, maybe a little less dribbling but between him, Hamer and that beast Vinny in the middle, Sheff Utd aren't in as bad a shape as Luton.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Sheffield United might want to try marking some of the big lads in the box.

[Jimmy Floyd]

I want full accountability for everyone who predicted Chelsea to finish top half. Full and frank apologies.

[Shindig]

The mighty blades. :D

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Anthony Gordon has been really good this season.

[Alan Shearer The 2nd]

Jesus Sheffield Utd. are abysmal.

[Shindig]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MrHoMSRZOS4

Just replace the bombs with Anthony Gordon smashing buildings.

[Lofty]

Heckingbottom with the 'bloody hell' mid shit.

[igor_balis]

Apropos of nothing, I've just been reminded of this amazing video

https://youtu.be/fFeg_hl0Se4?si=ZTcKxXxKJt8Ie9Ha

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

8-0 with all goalscorers being unique is pretty crazy.

[Raoul Duke]

Chelsea's next manager will be whoever is flavour-of-the-month. Currently it's De Zerbi.

[niko_cee]

I know it's easy to say, and I probably said it before about Potter, but I do genuinely wonder whether he would take the Chelsea job given what is going on at both clubs.

I guess, in the end, money talks, but Chelsea are years away from being any good, and the teams ahead of them are moving away from them at the moment, not towards them [Brighton included].

[Offshore Toon]

Almost anybody would accept a fuck you/retirement money contract that has a good chance of being paid in full within a year.

[Manc]

You can already see Will Still in the dugout.

[niko_cee]

He's WEST HAM isn't he?

And he'd be next in after De Zerbi [at both clubs].

[Spikey M]

Hopefully Mourinho is unemployed soon and they end up with him again. :drool:

[Shindig]

Nah, think about Mourinho at Brighton. :drool:

[niko_cee]

Chelsea should just reappoint Potter. They're probably still paying him and, in retrospect, his stint there was pretty good by the standards since.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Pochettino is irrelevant, nobody could turn this into a good team. Boehly just doesn't have a clue on a grand scale. We need to stop taking Americans seriously. These are not people who have the first clue about the outside world.

[Waffdon]

1706026144460374226

Lol

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

The our game is indeed ruined.

[Don]

Chelsea are 5th on xPTS, kids, so calm your very little boners.

[niko_cee]

Got to say I have no idea how that Gusto one gets upgraded from yellow to red whilst Nketiah is free to mow the Spurs 'keeper down with relative impunity.

[Jimmy Floyd]

The sport is in a seriously bad place with the ref stuff. Unsolvable too. When it was one bloke making subjective calls on the fly, you could just do a round of 'the referee's a wanker' and move on. Now it's several blokes making subjective calls on video, you've psychologically succumbed to 'we must arrive at the correct decision' which either a) doesn't exist or b) isn't reachable by the northern thickies available.

[CJay]

On the referee stuff I have to say it was very satisfying to see Heckingbottom’s team getting smashed after his disgraceful ‘we have to stop them’ rant last weekend. Should have been sanctioned for that.

[Jimmy Floyd]

That was a load of arrogant bullshit. Referee's job is to stop you timewasting. He doesn't give a fuck why you are taking ages. Your job is not to take ages.

[Jimmy Floyd]

On the northern thing, I believe only 2 of the 20 refs on the PL list (Simon Hooper and Tim Robinson) are from south of Birmingham. That feels incredibly unlikely.

[Waffdon]

A load of them are from Manchester or surrounding areas iirc

[niko_cee]

Bruno's been liberated from Chelsea.

:jayjay:

[Baz]

Reg

[John Arne]

Never get tired of reading tweets from Joel Embiid about Peter Drury

1691196865390481408

[Baz]

Apparently Kane’s three goals don’t count as a hat-trick in Germany because they weren’t consecutive and they weren’t all in the same half. I wonder if FM knows those rules.

[John Arne]

Apparently Kane’s three goals don’t count as a hat-trick in Germany because they weren’t consecutive and they weren’t all in the same half. I wonder if FM knows those rules.

Their 4 World Cups don't count as they weren't played in England, aka, 'the home of football'.

[Offshore Toon]

Barnes potentially out for months. :drool:

Emergency loan for Ben Arfa is the dream.

[Adramelch]

Their 4 World Cups don't count as they weren't played in England, aka, 'the home of football'.

Not to mention they weren't consecutive and in the same century.

[Waffdon]

1706626921121906972

XG Champions, you’ll never sing that.

[Dark Soldier]

The QUAD is still on

[Lewis]

1706731253511107033

lol

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Fucking hell.

[Dark Soldier]

Rumours Osimhen may take legal action against Napoli after their tik-tok account produced two videos ripping the fuck out of him in two days. Hell of a way to lose your best player.

[SincereTheRebel]

Rumours Osimhen may take legal action against Napoli after their tik-tok account produced two videos ripping the fuck out of him in two days. Hell of a way to lose your best player.

Wtf did i just watch...

[John Arne]

The video is shit, Osimhen's reaction is shit, and Napoli are shit.

[Don]

I planned a trip to Italy to watch my boy Azmoun at Roma and the game got moved so ended up watching Napoli tonight as a backup. Slapped on my Nigeria kit and now looks like I may have to watch Simeone's favela offspring.

[randomlegend]

1706731253511107033

lol

That miss looks deliberate tbh.

[John Arne]

Jesus, this all reads a bit small time.



Mauricio Pochettino has said that Mykhailo Mudryk finally not losing to him at crossbar challenge is proof the £88.5m winger is becoming more confident after a difficult start to his Chelsea career.

They have suffered from a lack of ruthlessness in attack, with five goals in their first six league games, and Pochettino made his inexperienced side do shooting practice at the end of training on Tuesday.

“The problem with confidence is we cannot buy it in the supermarket,” Chelsea’s head coach said. “It is about time. You know how it works in the brain. It is about little by little creating situations that can provide the trust and the confidence and the belief.

“One example: today, with Mudryk, I like to play hitting the crossbar from outside the box. He said to me today: ‘No, I’m not going to play any more with you because always you win.’ I said: ‘Yes, because I have the belief – the balance between belief and quality I know very well because I am 50 years old and you are still young.’ Today was the first time that we draw.

“Now you start to believe in yourself, you start to believe in your quality because, if not, it is not good balance in between belief and quality. It is difficult. You work on the psychology of the player and provide the players with the confidence to touch the ball and score. It’s a small example.”

[Don]

Easy to dismiss but I've got a lot of time for any man who recognises the importance of psychology on a footballer. Klopp isn't a tactical genius but psychologically, he is one of the all-time greats. The two are equally important. Similarly, you look at players like Bissouma and you see the importance it has on a player.

[randomlegend]

:lol:

[Jimmy Floyd]

I'm in on Poch. He needs two years minimum to turn this around.

[Waffdon]

So, Poch has been playing Colwill (a centre half) at left back whilst benching 2/3 other left backs in Cucurella/Chilwell/Maatsen. Tonight, well tonight he starts all 4 of them.

Just use an academy player you melt

[Lofty]

None of the academy boys could beat him at the crossbar challenge.

[Gray Fox]

Dirty Dom just near took the bar off with his goal.

[Waffdon]

The linesman in the Chelsea game was genuinely drunk (not gonna get onto the referee. Chelsea should have been down to 10). Flagged Jackson offside when he was yards onside and then proceeded to do it again to flag his goal offside when he was clearly on again. Then he flagged Broja offside in his own half when through on goal.

I miss VAR

[Shindig]

Just for laughs, Joelinton should stick a cheeky tackle on Guardiola on the way to the dressing room.