All I Want For Christmas is Some Transfer Rumours

[Ian]

Bah, didn't want him anyway. :moop:

You really didn't.

[Manc]

That's an unfortunate sponsor.

[Pepe]

:D

l

[Pen]

Didn't he play for Finland too?

I think he was capped by England when he was considered promising and we started sniffing around. Kalle Jenkinen was never meant to be.

[randomlegend]

Arsenal after a striker; Calvert-Lewin, Isak and Vlahovic the names bandied about. Vlahovic looks to be off to Juve however.

[Manc]

Fiorentina to Juventus, they'll never forgive him.

[Gray Fox]

They've just lost Chiesa to an ACL injury and Dybala is likely off on a free in the summer. If they don't get Vlahovic they'll need someone in.

[randomlegend]

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Good move I guess? IDK. If he doesn't have a place now I don't see why he would in 6 months.

[Ian]

I love managers continually not wanting to move our players on but also absolutely refusing to play them.

I hope van de Beek is looking forward to another three years of this shit.

[Kikó]

What's the point. Let him die.

[Ian]

"Sorry, Donny, continuing to not let you leave or play was part of Ole's severance package."

https://i.ibb.co/mF6nnd8/image.png

[Giggles]

:cab:


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[CJay]

Will be leading Watford’s unsuccessful 23/24 Premier League campaign. Or maybe parachuted in for the 24/25 promotion chase.

[Don]

:drool:

[Shindig]

Lingard doesn't want to join Newcastle on a permanent basis but he is willing to stay with them for the rest of the season.

But it worked out so well for Joe Willock. We're squabbling about the loan fee.

[niko_cee]

The details of this Lingard deal [or no deal] sound hilarious.

[Shindig]

Might as well buy a permanent player for the £18m.

[Manc]

Bruno Guimaraes on his way to the Toon.

[Giggles]

They went and did it anyway, for half a million too apparently. They’d probably have got him for 20% of that.

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[Lofty]

United looking to scupper JLingz move it seems.

[Shindig]

If they want to keep him, they should probably just tell him.

[randomlegend]

They don't, they want to sell him. The only club that wants to buy him now is Newcastle. He doesn't want to go there permanently because he wants to see if he gets better offers once he's a free agent.

Therefore the only option is a loan, and United only benefit from that if there's a decent fee. Otherwise they may as well just have him as depth for the next 6 months with Martial already having gone out. He won't play much but why would they care?

[Lewis]

He could have been leading West Ham to the title by now but he wanted to stay. What a silly cunt.

[Don]

Is Pepper Bae defending the inclusion of a £12m safety-from-relegation bonus?

[Spikey M]

Your Insta doesn't get as many likes when you're at West Ham.

[Shindig]

Is Pepper Bae defending the inclusion of a £12m safety-from-relegation bonus?

:D

It sounds even dafter when you see it written down like that.

[randomlegend]

Of course it's daft. If Newcastle pay it they are retarded. But Utd have zero incentive to send him out on loan for anything other than a stupid deal.

[Shindig]

I assume it's not cheaper to buy his contract out but, if he doesn't want a permanent deal, there's no point. Fuck, take a one year deal and do the same song and dance next January.

[randomlegend]

1486360816538595332

[Raoul Duke]

Big fan of how Utd have bought in "Ralf" who is famed for his club building endeavours and we've been linked with...almost nobody?

[randomlegend]

I'd imagine they don't want to sign anyone til the new manager is sorted.

[Raoul Duke]

You could make the same argument about loaning out most of our squad depth

[randomlegend]

If they loan out players, they'll come back when the new manager joins and they can decide what they want to do with them.

If they buy players now and then the new manager doesn't fancy them, it's yet more money wasted on players who don't play.

[Kikó]

Cheers Ed.

You'd like to hope we had someone lined up as we flog the first subs but we probably don't.

[Ian]

It's important to keep players who'd rather be fucked off somewhere else because you never know whether the manager-after-next might want them.

And then avoid playing them if at all possible in the meantime, of course.

[Spikey M]

If your new Manager turns up and decides that J-Lingz is the man for him, then you've fucked the recruitment process again.

[Baz]

He’s better than Rashford.

[Ian]

At this point I just find it easier to assume that everything we do will be annoying at best and cretinous at worst and then when we occasionally buck that trend wahey, bonus.

[Luke Emia]

What I don’t get with this whole Lingard thing is in 6 months he goes for nothing. It appears obvious no one wants to pay a proper fee for him at the minute and he’s going on a free in the summer anyway.

Say to Newcastle ok 2 million plus another 2 if you stay up. At least then you’ve got something for him and aren’t paying his wages for the next six months.

Or of course you could just keep him and not play him, pay his wages as well then lose him for nothing.

[Ian]

United don't seem to consider wages to be paid in money given how long we'll keep players on the books because we want to get value for them rather than just let them fuck off and save the money.

If they wanted something for Lingard they should have told Ole to shut his face and just flogged him.

[John Arne]

I literally bumped into Hoang Vu Samson at the weekend. I went to a friendly game for Ho Chi Minh City last weekend and had a chat with him of the side of the pitch. Pleasant enough, and not at all big-headed considering his feats in the Jimmy Floyd annual top scorer thing.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Was he called something else in those days? I can't recall the name.

[John Arne]

Was he called something else in those days? I can't recall the name.

Oh, possibly... Samson Olaleye? Unless, I'm misremembering - I could have sworn it was Samson knocking them in for fun at one point.

[randomlegend]

If your new Manager turns up and decides that J-Lingz is the man for him, then you've fucked the recruitment process again.

Lingard is out of contract. That's why they want to sell him or get a silly fee for a loan, he's leaving in 6 months regardless.

[Manc]

Ive just had a peak at United's wage bill and my word.

[Ian]

It's quite something, isn't it?

[Manc]

Utterly baffling.

[Kikó]

But the assets are invaluable.

[Jimmy Floyd]

It's the sort of thing that results from accountants being given the keys.

[Ben]

Ive just had a peak at United's wage bill and my word.

Jesus.

How has Brandon Williams managed to get himself on £70k a week just from a few good games two years ago?

[Ian]

It's what United do.

Anybody half decent you immediately overpay them rather than, say, work out if they're actually any good and decide if/when offers start coming in how much you want to compete to keep them.

[randomlegend]

Jesus.

How has Brandon Williams managed to get himself on £70k a week just from a few good games two years ago?

Yeah...when I went and saw Norwich the other week he was an absolute nothing player even for them. Unreal.

[randomlegend]

Adams Traore off to Barca on loan with €35m option to buy by the looks of things.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Them paying that much for some blunderbuss with the finesse of Lofty on a trapeze is another sign of the empire's end.

[Ian]

Lofty Any footage of you on a trapeze to counter Jimmy's libellous comment above?

[Ben]

The biggest enigma I've seen in football. Every fan of every club he's been at knows he is shit, yet cannot help creaming themselves every time he gets the ball in the hope he will emulate Messi at x10 speed.

I remember a lot of Middlesbrough fans being pissed off when we sold him to Wolves, but after a minute of thought soon agreed getting £20m was brilliant business.

Just seen Ornstein's tweet: club-to-club talks with Spurs were positive but Traore not keen playing RWB.

I thought Conte was some master tactician? All the lad can do is knock at past someone and zoom after it. Conte's wing backs have to defend too, right?

[Luke Emia]

Lingard is out of contract. That's why they want to sell him or get a silly fee for a loan, he's leaving in 6 months regardless.

But say 4 million and the saving on his wages for six months is surely better than asking for a ridiculous amount now and then because of that paying his wages for six months and him going for free then anyway.

[randomlegend]

But say 4 million and the saving on his wages for six months is surely better than asking for a ridiculous amount now and then because of that paying his wages for six months and him going for free then anyway.

Presumably they value having him as emergency backup for 6 months at more than 4.5 million quid. Not sure I agree but then it's pocket change to a club like United.

I guess they also aren't that keen on helping Saudi-owned Newcastle to stay up.

[Ben]

We've just established they pay Brandon Williams the best part of £4m per year so that puts the Lingard situation into perspective a bit.

[randomlegend]

1486686092195680257

I reckon he'll tear shit up.

[Shindig]

I think we need a centre back before this window is done.

[phonics]

Calum Chambers to Villa. Great signing for them.

[Lofty]

Lofty Any footage of you on a trapeze to counter Jimmy's libellous comment above?

I'm ungainly clambering over a baby gate to be fair.

[Mellberg]

Calum Chambers to Villa. Great signing for them.

Right up there with Emi Martinez.

[Lofty]

Martinez is a quality keeper. Chambers got raped by Jefferson Montero and never recovered.

[phonics]

Thats not true at all. He was an absolute king and then did his ACL.

[niko_cee]

198 pa?

[thommo]

He was decent at Fulham, but only when used as a holding midfielder in the 2nd half of the season. Anywhere in the back 4 and he was shocking.

[John Arne]

Fresh-faced 24yr old Samuel Kalu joins Watford.

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[Ben]

Hard paper round.

[Gray Fox]

Liverpool have been linked to Luis Diaz since the summer and it seemed a foregone conclusion we’d have him in the coming summer.

However Spurs bidding for him seems to have moved up the plans. A lot of noise saying it’ll happen today for ~£50m.

[Baz]

Is he good?

[Ian]

According to Wikipedia his nickname is 'Big D' and he appears to be an average sized bloke so ready into that what you will.

That's all the insight I have to offer.

[Ben]

Seems a bit of an expensive replacement for Minamino. I'd expect the Salah, Mané, Jota, Firmino quartet to dominate for another couple of years yet.

[Gray Fox]

Liverpool have 4 options for that position off the left really and 3 of them could leave in the summer. Minaminos fate is probably sealed by this move and Origi really does deserve to play somewhere full time.

Mane joins the rest of our front 3 in being out of contract in 2023. Salah surely gets a new deal, but the other two I'm not so sure. What they want and what they get offered will likely be too far apart.

[Waffdon]

Luis Diaz is going to be Salah levels of good within a few years

[randomlegend]

He's already 25.

[niko_cee]

Diaz thing seems to be going BBC official [at least in terms of the offer/interest].

Like Taz I thought he looked malnourished so let's hope that ends up being more of a Rivaldo trajectory than, I dunno, some weedy player who never amounted to much. Denilson?

[Gray Fox]

Salah was also 25 when we signed him and as we well know, he went on to be a massive flop.

Sounds like this has also kicked the door open to throw Minamino out before the window closes. Leeds and Monaco mooted for him.

[Ian]

I have to say I've been enormously disappointed by Newcastle not having been spectacularly cretinous in this window.

[randomlegend]

Salah was also 25 when we signed him and as we well know, he went on to be a massive flop.

Sounds like this has also kicked the door open to throw Minamino out before the window closes. Leeds and Monaco mooted for him.

I didn't say I think he'll flop, but it's rare for players suddenly kick on after 25 to be one of the top 5 players in the world. By all accounts he sounds like he's a very good player.

[Jimmy Floyd]

The key is to have a failed spell at Chelsea when you're 22.

[Don]

Brentford with bids in for Brennan Johnson and Keane Lewis-Potter. Mad these big clubs are still sleeping on these two.

[niko_cee]

No idea about the latter, but yes on the former. He looks genuine quality, although don't Brentford favour wingbacks? Where does he fit for them? Looks more of a front 3 wide man type.

See there's more noise about stealing that Carvalho kid off Fulham as well. :baz:

[Don]

I've never even seen a moving image of either of them but their stats over the last 2 seasons are clear as day that they'll be quality prem players but instead Newcastle and Co go after favela cunts.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Keane Lewis-Potter's insta, 3rd picture from the start is an interesting vibe (I can't work out a way to c&p).

[niko_cee]

RIP Granddad?

Or does instagram work downwards rather than across and then down, in which case yes, not even sure how to describe that. Diving header under and man jumping in a seated position?

[Jimmy Floyd]

I've got him posing for valentine's day next to a lady who dwarfs him in every respect.

[niko_cee]

That was my other guess but that one appears next to last for me.

[Ian]

Snipping tool and paste into imgbb, Jimmy.

[Giggles]

This place has insta tags doesn’t it?

[niko_cee]

SNIP (https://ibb.co/rMsx0BN)

That the one?

[Don]

Just copy the link to the post, you disgraces.

[Spikey M]

Adama Traore to Barcelona is end of days stuff isn't it? Fuck me. What a drop in standards. You could sign Usain Bolt on a free and he would provide exactly the same attributes.

[Waffdon]

Barcelona not far off Middlesbrough front 3 from a few years back :lol:

[ScousePig]

Sunderland have signed Danny Batth, Patrick Roberts and Jack Clarke (loan) in the past week.

Should be okay in division 3, right?

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

£29m potentially for Adama :cab:

[Don]

Newcastle looking to spend £10m+ on Dan Burn and any kind of currency for Eddie Nketiah makes that look a bargain tbf.

[Shindig]

Apparently, right, the problem is we have too much money

[niko_cee]

Bet the roll him out as some sort of La Masia success story.

[Don]

1487107695928909824

[Mellberg]

Bentancur any good? We’ve had a bid rejected and are going back in I think.

[niko_cee]

I seem to recall him being the next big thing [to the extent that a Uruguayan chugger can be the next big thing] a while back, then Juve went to shit so who knows. I doubt he's better than Luiz/McGinn.

[Spikey M]

1487377791167442944?t=eidzUG68qBI8G9zkckzQLg&s=19

[randomlegend]

1486686092195680257

I reckon he'll tear shit up.

Debut goal :cool:

Phil Jones potentially on-loan to Bordeaux, which is a bit left-field.

[randomlegend]

Kulusevski to Tottenham, loan with option (becomes obligation if certain conditions met).

Zakaria to Juve.

[Lewis]

Does Diallo have a recall agreement?

[randomlegend]

Van De Beek to Everton on loan.

[Gray Fox]

Luis Diaz official.

[Ben]

He looks very skinny.

[Manc]

Five and a half year deal. Is this common practice now?

[Ben]

Yeah. It's all about assets now. If he's shit, they can still command a big fee when selling him on.

[niko_cee]

Five and a half year deal. Is this common practice now?

It's always 5.5 when they sign in January, 5 for summer signings.

[Ben]

Levy seething. :D

https://www.telegraph.co.uk/football/2022/01/30/liverpool-backdoored-tottenham-win-battle-luis-diaz-outflanked/

...

“Backdoored”. That is the old transfer window hands’ term for the deal that is repurposed in the white heat of the last days of negotiations to take the player in question to a completely different club. The fees and the wages are much the same, although there is likely some incentive for the player and his representatives to switch horses at the last moment. But essentially the deal that is in place for the subject to move from club A to club B is hijacked by club C who quietly emerge into the negotiations through the figurative backdoor.

It was not news on Friday to Daniel Levy, the Spurs chairman. He had found out 24 hours earlier he was being backdoored and tried his best over Thursday to regain the advantage as Liverpool’s recruitment department and their new 25 year-old goalscorer came to a swift agreement.

...

Come Thursday, when Levy finally learned just how far down the road Liverpool’s recruitment team had progressed with Diaz, there was precious little he could do about it. Well-placed sources say that Levy threatened to report Liverpool’s recruitment staff to Fenway owners John W Henry and Mike Gordon. The key flaw in that plan being that Henry and Gordon were delighted with the strategy pursued.

[-james-]

Dan Burn to Newcastle for £15 million seems pretty decent for all involved parties.

[niko_cee]

Diaz has been linked with Liverpool since the summer, probably before, so it seems a bit desperate to try and paint that as some sort of last minute deal hijacking. If anything, him going to Spurs' seemed more out of the blue.

£15m for Dan Burn seems a bit :cab: but then I guess that's the sort of fee Liverpool are asking for Phillips so maybe that's just the going rate.

[Giggles]

I’ve heard Dan Burns name before and it’s 2022 so £15m is basically a free.

[Lewis]

Daniel Levy complaining to Liverpool about his own club ought to be the end of him the absolute myth.

[Gray Fox]

Diaz was the top summer target for the window coming up.

Klopp prefers to get them in then to get them on the PEDs and give them a full pre season. The problem was Liverpool got wind that even though Spurs were originally rejected, they would probably agree a deal before Monday. So it was either let him go, or go in now.

[Gray Fox]

Aubameyang to Barcelona on loan has popped up seemingly from nowhere.

[niko_cee]

How would that work when they've spent the last X number of years desperate to get high wage wasters off their books?

[Giggles]

For the same reason they have any players at all when in any other industry they wouldn’t exist any more - none of it is real money and no rules apply.

[niko_cee]

Also, on the lolspurs front, what the fuck is this:


Tottenham have not been able to reach an agreement with Lewes midfielder Ollie Tanner, the non-league club have confirmed.

A six-figure bid for the 19-year-old winger had been accepted by Lewes, with Tanner training with Spurs’ development squad for the past fortnight.

However, the non-league side have announced that Tanner remains with them, having failed to agree personal terms with Tottenham.

A statement said: “Lewes Football Club would like to confirm that whilst the club and a Premier League club agreed a deal in principle for the transfer of Ollie Tanner, Ollie and the Premier Club were not ultimately able to agree personal terms and he remains a Lewes FC player.

“Tanner missed today’s game against AFC Hornchurch due to an injury sustained midweek and we look forward to welcoming him back to the side as soon as he has recovered.”

Tanner has been watched by Spurs academy chief Chris Powell, having been recommended by Lewes boss Tony Russell.

Brighton are understood to have had an offer rejected that would have seen Tanner remain at Lewes on loan for the rest of the season.


How do you fail to agree personal terms with a non-league player?

Should be following in Solly March's footsteps anyway.

[Shindig]

Maybe it was as simple as him not wanting to go straight back to Lewes?

[Gray Fox]

He's an Arsenal fan who posted a lot of stuff in the past taking the piss out of Harry Kane, which came to light after they showed interest.

[Spikey M]

He had a load of historic tweets taking the piss out of Kane, so they fucked him off. :happycry:

[Shindig]

Man, that's petty. I love it. :D

[Gray Fox]

Liverpool now going in for Fabio Carvalho from Fulham. I'd expect this one will end up in a 6 month loan back.

[Spikey M]

1485933050185887748?t=-q9GVLcBNTHCU8ibfOKlbQ&s=19

[niko_cee]

:D

What a div.

Wonder if they got Kane in to personally offer him a quid a week or whatever in the contract negotiations.

[Giggles]

I’d like to think they knew before they brought him in at all.

[-james-]

Diaz has been linked with Liverpool since the summer, probably before, so it seems a bit desperate to try and paint that as some sort of last minute deal hijacking. If anything, him going to Spurs' seemed more out of the blue.

£15m for Dan Burn seems a bit :cab: but then I guess that's the sort of fee Liverpool are asking for Phillips so maybe that's just the going rate.

He was out of contract next summer I believe. He's been good this season but you could see him leaving on a free then, so it seems a pretty tidy win.

Presumably also fills the local lad in the XI quota for Newcastle now that whichever Longstaff is getting displaced by Bruno.

[Spikey M]

He may well get picked up by another team, but imagine if he doesn't and his one shot at joining a Premier League football club was ruined by some sub-par banter. Suicide level regret.

That said, I'd be signing him and making a very big deal of it if I were in charge at Arsenal.

[Pepe]

If he is good at kicking a ball around, who the fuck cares about what he said on Twitter?

[Spikey M]

If he is good at kicking a ball around, who the fuck cares about what he said on Twitter?

The club probably didn't give a shit. He'd have been told to delete it quietly and it all goes away. But once the fans have found it and gone into full on outrage mode then it's probably easier to just not bother with it.

[Pepe]

As if any of those "fans" will start following another team because of this shite. One goal and all will be forgotten.

Basically, fuck Twitter.

[Giggles]

As if any of those "fans" will start following another team because of this shite. One goal and all will be forgotten.

Basically, fuck Twitter.

Twitter is awesome.

[Giggles]

If Eriksen is medically cleared to play then why is he going to Brentford? Or did he go to shite completely in Italy anyway before any of this happened?

[Ben]

It's probably because it's a complete unknown what he's capable of now. It's only a six-month deal, so being back in London suits him, as does being with Danish friends.

If he's shit, they'll let him go. If he's good, someone better will snap him up on a free. Either Brentford or Eriksen are taking a punt on themselves here, and I'm not sure which one.

[Manc]

The Danish connection.

[Spikey M]

If Eriksen is medically cleared to play then why is he going to Brentford? Or did he go to shite completely in Italy anyway before any of this happened?

It's a bit like the old 1950's cars that somehow make it through an MOT. They're road legal and apparently safe to drive, but you have to worry what would happen if you opened it up on a motorway.

[Lofty]

It's a bit like the old 1950's cars that somehow make it through an MOT. They're road legal and apparently safe to drive, but you have to worry what would happen if you opened it up on a motorway.

Ironically he isn't medically cleared to play in Italy with his heart device, but is in England, whilst no car has ever failed it's MOT in Italy no matter what state it is in.

[Shindig]

I figured going back to Holland would've made more sense with them being okay with implanted defibrillators. Daley Blind manages with one.

EDIT: How are we still linked with Lingard? Matt Targett looks close. We'll be swimming in full backs.

[Kikó]

Are there any players other than Eriksson who play with a pacemaker?

[randomlegend]

Are there any players other than Eriksson who play with a pacemaker?

I think he most likely has an implantable defibrillator rather than a pacemaker (although modern ones can also act as pacemakers if needed). So it automatically detects his heart rhythm and if it goes into a shockable arrhythmia it will automatically deliver shocks. Pretty cool shit (unless you're the one who has it I guess)

[Don]

Bissouma links to Utd are unfortunately timed :D

[Ben]

Wout Weghorst to Burnley. I mean, that's the most Burnley signing I can think of from their point of view but I'm surprised Weghorst is willing to potentially drop into the Championship while he's in his prime scoring regularly in the Bundesliga and starting for Holland.

[randomlegend]

Bissouma links to Utd? Where you getting that, The Sun?

[Kikó]

I think he most likely has an implantable defibrillator rather than a pacemaker (although modern ones can also act as pacemakers if needed). So it automatically detects his heart rhythm and if it goes into a shockable arrhythmia it will automatically deliver shocks. Pretty cool shit (unless you're the one who has it I guess)

Sounds like we all should get one just in case.

(Cheers for the info)

[randomlegend]

Bentancur to Tottenham.

West Ham bid £50m for Darwin Nunez.

Nicolas Pepe potentially going out on loan (lol).

[-james-]

Wouldn't surprise me if Bissouma got sold out of the blue today. If someone comes in with £50 million I imagine he'll go.

[Don]

That dutch lump is a bigger lump than Woods so could flourish. Newcastle have bought haf a team and will pick up. Frank's Everton are in trouble :drool:

[Waffdon]

Aaron Ramsey to Rangers is the most random thing ever. Doing all they can to stop the Celtic Asian express train

[Waffdon]

Aubameyang doing his best Peter Odemwingie impression arriving in Barcelona.

[-james-]

Ramsey to Rangers is done. :cab:

[Spikey M]

Dele Alli to Everton
N'Dombele to Lyon
Lo Celso to Villarreal
Gil to Valencia.

It appears Tottenham do not need a midfield.

(They're signing Kulusevski and Bentancur)

[Don]

Spare a thought to MK Dons who are no doubt sitting on a sell-on fee clause from 7 years ago that after 2 years would have been associated with a £50m+ player :happycry:

Edit: rumoured to be 20% of profit on the original £5m fee.

[Spikey M]

1488175730093658114?t=UG7HsQ2ogrfLBK59usBiTA&s=19

:D

[Ian]

I wonder which 19 games they'll play him in.

[Giggles]

7 before he’s dropped.

[niko_cee]

There are presumably boring technical details which disallow such practice, but it'd be lol if Everton could just play him for those 19 games [I can't imagine they'll have many more than that this season] and then move him on in the summer. I suppose, in a way, playing him 19 times might relegate them so might be a high price to pay actually.

[niko_cee]

Also, Lyon have a £54m option to buy Ndombele eh? :happycry:

Good luck with that.

[Mellberg]

The kind of shit we were up to whilst circling the plug hole.

Edit: Alli, obvs. We weren’t spending £5.40, nevermind £54 mil.

[Lofty]

Aubameyang doing his best Peter Odemwingie impression arriving in Barcelona.

Especially since talks are supposedly breaking down.

[niko_cee]

Up to £40m for Alli sounds like some going. Would love to see the clauses on that. £10m if they win the Champions League, £10m if he wins the Ballon d'Or...

[Gray Fox]

Lingard has been told it's too late and he's to stay until the summer.

It's all gone a bit quiet over Fabio Carvalho. Still 5 hours to go, but I thought we might have heard something by now.

[Lewis]

He deserves that for putting those quotes out about United being worried how good he would be elsewhere.

[Waffdon]

Newcastle trying to steal Dele Alli from Everton lol. Mid off

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

1488119428109766657

Signing of the window.

[Ian]

I dunno, 'How, I reckon some of the others from One Direction would probably have been more desirable signings.

[Lofty]

Aubemeyang to Barca now a free transfer.

[Shindig]

Decent month for us, in theory. Would've liked a bit more creativity in the middle but whatever. Reshaping the defence was kind of crucial. Hopefully they gel quick. I think I like this desperate era of Barcelona.

Dele Alli's future is a bit grim.

[Don]

Matty Longstaff played 14 PL games in the last 2 seasons, banged in a goal of the month winner against Man Utd before scoring against them at Old Trafford too. He's now being duly rewarded with a monster contract at Udinese.

https://talksport.com/football/714234/udinese-matty-longstaff-newcastle-premier-league-watford/amp/

Wait, no, my bad...

https://www.thenorthernecho.co.uk/sport/19889101.matty-longstaff-joins-mansfield-newcastle/

[Offshore Toon]

I'm still a bit worried about our defence, but Guimaraes appears to be a great signing.

[Manc]

Looking at Newcastle's business led me to thirty year old Henri Saivet being without a club. Possibly the last time FM massively overhyped a teenager.

[Gray Fox]

Yaya Sanogo is 29 now too.

I see the Carvalho deal fell through because of lack of deal sheet. Seems daft to have waited that late but it sounds like it may still be agreed anyway. I reckon Fulham will be keep to avoid being shafted like they were for Harvey Elliott.

[Manc]

Browsing teams wages is my new favourite past time. Madrid spending £900k a week on Bale & Hazard is a thing of beauty.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Hazard and his 'dream move' are a great example of why far, far more players should stay as big fishes in small ponds for their whole careers. Grealish probably another. You don't need to join the big club. You just don't.

[niko_cee]

Maybe in cases like his, but the money is still nice, but I reckon in 95% of other football situations (players and managers) it's always best to get your big move whilst your stock is high as so so many players turn out to be useless after at one point appearing to be world beaters (Dele Alli) and so many managers go from flavour of the month to sacked and back in the lower leagues (Wilder) when they stay loyal to the team they have done well with. Coutinho and Dembele showing the world how its done (Oscar too).

[Shindig]

Looking at Newcastle's business led me to thirty year old Henri Saivet being without a club. Possibly the last time FM massively overhyped a teenager.

What a weird move it's been for him. By all accounts, he likes it here and gets on with everybody. No manager's come through the door and seen him as good enough. 5 appearances, one cracker of a free-kick.

[Ben]

Maybe in cases like his, but the money is still nice, but I reckon in 95% of other football situations (players and managers) it's always best to get your big move whilst your stock is high as so so many players turn out to be useless after at one point appearing to be world beaters (Dele Alli) and so many managers go from flavour of the month to sacked and back in the lower leagues (Wilder) when they stay loyal to the team they have done well with. Coutinho and Dembele showing the world how its done (Oscar too).

Wilder won't be lower leagues for long. We're going up.

[Spikey M]

I wouldn't write off Alli completely. He has become a bit of a lazy arse, more interested in computer games than playing football, but he also hasn't been helped by his last 3 successive managers playing him out of position. He isn't a central midfielder or a winger, he's an attacking midfielder that likes to sit between attack and defence so he can make runs into the box. If Everton let him do that, then he may well have some joy again.

[Jimmy Floyd]

He can do that and Donald van de Beek can watch him do it from the bench.

[niko_cee]

:D

Any hope for either of those as '8s' [as appears to be the modern parlance for what we might have once called a box-to-box midfielder] or are they both too lazy/attacking for that?

Alli just looks like he's bulked [fatted] up too much from what he was like when he was good.

[Don]

Everton are properly fucked and it's going to be glorious to see Frank be outed once again.

[Spikey M]

He can do that and Donald van de Beek can watch him do it from the bench.

:D hopefully.

[Spikey M]

Everton are properly fucked and it's going to be glorious to see Frank be outed once again.

Truly bizarre appointment. They should be too good to go down, but they've given themselves the best chance of managing it.

[Kikó]

I wouldn't write off pogba completely. He has become a bit of a lazy arse, more interested in computer games than playing football, but he also hasn't been helped by his last 3 successive managers playing him out of position. He isn't a central midfielder or a winger, he's an attacking midfielder that likes to sit between attack and defence so he can make runs into the box. If Everton let him do that, then he may well have some joy again.

Dots.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Frank is a lot better than people think he is / want him to be. Done a very solid job at both his clubs thus far. He isn't Pep but then who is. He'll keep Everton up easily and get them into the top half next season.

[Don]

Still twerking for Lamps :D

[niko_cee]

I see the Carvalho deal fell through because of lack of deal sheet. Seems daft to have waited that late but it sounds like it may still be agreed anyway. I reckon Fulham will be keep to avoid being shafted like they were for Harvey Elliott.

What was the Elliot deal in the end anyway?

Saw he was back donning some reserve game senseless the other day. :drool:

[-james-]

It would be the funniest shit ever if Everton went down. They will be comfortably safe though.

[Waffdon]

Still twerking for Lamps :D

He should be fine there. He’ll get them to 10th-12th this season and then use his pull to bring in more huge signings in the summer which will no doubt backfire but we’ll see. At least he’s brought in a very good 1st team coach alongside him

[niko_cee]

Assuming there must be a Dundee United angle there.

[thommo]

What was the Elliot deal in the end anyway?

Saw he was back donning some reserve game senseless the other day. :drool:

Tribunal determined it at £4.3m if all clauses are met. Fabio would probably be worth quite a bit more looking at the criteria they use.

[niko_cee]

Pretty shocking really, considering he's going to be running riot in Qatar come the end of the year.

They should factor in more remote possibility upside clauses.

[Waffdon]

Assuming there must be a Dundee United angle there.

Derby Day :cool:

[niko_cee]

Albion player arrested over sexual assault allegations from last October. Presumably it's who has been linked with such allegations to date. Wonder if the police were holding out until the transfer window closed for some sort of potential trolling reason? Erm, you know that guy we just bought for £50m . . .

Edit, maybe I've misread the story, remains under investigation.

[Gray Fox]

Pretty shocking really, considering he's going to be running riot in Qatar come the end of the year.

They should factor in more remote possibility upside clauses.

I personally think there should always be a sell on fee included. Also maybe some for time spent at the club too.

[Baz]

Wouldn't surprise me if Bissouma got sold out of the blue today.
Not far off.

[Mellberg]

Hazard and his 'dream move' are a great example of why far, far more players should stay as big fishes in small ponds for their whole careers. Grealish probably another. You don't need to join the big club. You just don't.

Indeed. Grealish might acclimatise eventually and may even become a good player for them, but he’s designed to be a flamboyant menace with free reign, not some divvy false nine who FITS THE SYSTEM.

The money’s been good to us and we’ve signed five players since in Digne, Coutinho, Buendia, Bailey and Ings who have completely upgraded the squad, but whenever City come to town I’ll always wonder what the fuck he’s doing there.

[Giggles]

Until I heard it on a podcast today I never knew Tammy Abraham went to Roma, let alone know he’s flying over there too.

[Lofty]

Almost like it's an inferior quality league.

[Giggles]

Yet everyone isn’t flying in it.

[Jimmy Floyd]

When you said 'flying over there' I did some scrambled googling as I had imagined some sort of scenario where he's commuting to training from London.

Tammy is one of those strikers who may look like an awkward shite but will always score goals.

[Luke Emia]

I think he has a level and it isn't quite at the top but a bit like Ings if he is in a team and gets the games he's going to give you 10-15 goals every season even with some of the deficiencies he has in his game.

[Spikey M]

Almost like it's an inferior quality league.

Is it though? As a whole, sure, but if there's one thing the Italians can do (famously) It's defend. It's not like he's doing it in Germany like the rest of the Pacey chancers.

[Lofty]

Counterpoint: strikers go to Italy and score a hatful then come to England and can't finish their dinner. No doubt Abraham will come back for £100m next summer and struggle for double figures.

[Waffdon]

Is it though? As a whole, sure, but if there's one thing the Italians can do (famously) It's defend. It's not like he's doing it in Germany like the rest of the Pacey chancers.

Nah, only Germany will be ahead of Italy for goals per game.

[Spikey M]

Lads, listen, the last time I looked at Italian Football Channel 4 held the rights to broadcast. But stereotypes hold firm. Goooaaal Lazio.

[randomlegend]

Is it though? As a whole, sure, but if there's one thing the Italians can do (famously) It's defend. It's not like he's doing it in Germany like the rest of the Pacey chancers.

Isn't ITALIAN DEFENSES MATE a thing of the past? I'm sure I remember reading that Serie A has a really high goals per game these days.

Edit: too slow RL

[Jimmy Floyd]

From what I've seen of Serie A since getting BT, there are a lot of technically very good players able to operate in a lot more time and space than you get in England, so opportunity for goals is plenty. Defending is probably the same or slightly better as the refs are probably more pro-defending.

Germany is like England except no one bothers to defend, ever (by coach design, I think). Quick players there are way overpowered due to the enormous gaps left behind barely-organised backlines.

[Adramelch]

I think it's also more of a tactical thing. Not many teams play defensive football over there anymore. Feels like there's a shift towards the Atalanta way of doing things.

[Luke Emia]

Counterpoint: strikers go to Italy and score a hatful then come to England and can't finish their dinner. No doubt Abraham will come back for £100m next summer and struggle for double figures.

He will always get double figures in the league if he's fit for a season. He's decent without being brilliant.

[Giggles]

Chelsea supposedly interested in Omobamidele which would be a disaster.

[Giggles]

Don’t think I’d ever heard of Jordan McEneff but I’d be all over some Arsenal youth for a season.

[phonics]

Me neither.

[Mellberg]

I’ve just heard of Bryan Gil for the first time. What is that all about? Are Spurs not in enough of a tight spot financially to be loaning out 20m+ players 6 months after signing them?

This where the STATS fuck you over. Just take a look at the boy. Malnourished with a shit moustache. Was never going to work.

[Don]

This Italian they've given the rein to sounds trouble. He's spending big bucks signing Atalanta's Villa reject keeper and now this Richard Ashcroft (https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bryan_Gil) piece of shit looks the biggest waste of space since Wolves signed that kooks band member but at least he had some physique to his name. And all with Nuno in charge. Jesus.

No other industry is as starkly bent as transfers at the top level.

[Spikey M]

I’ve just heard of Bryan Gil for the first time. What is that all about? Are Spurs not in enough of a tight spot financially to be loaning out 20m+ players 6 months after signing them?

This where the STATS fuck you over. Just take a look at the boy. Malnourished with a shit moustache. Was never going to work.

In fairness, it's the one area of the pitch that they are gifted with choices in. He was never playing and with Kulusevski coming in it was going to get even harder for him.

The real question is why they signed him, when they are in greater need in literally every other position on the pitch.

[Raoul Duke]

It was also a part-exchange with Lamela going the other way, who (aside from blowing a fuse every so often) was actually a decent player

[Gray Fox]

1495457506138759173

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Here we go.

[Baz]

If these Haaland to City rumours are true, god help the rest of the league.

Also probably FPLs first 15.0 player

[Waffdon]

Half his goals are from running in behind a defence standing on the half way line like Timo Werner was doing. He’s obviously better than him but I’m not sure he’ll make that much of a difference.

[Lewis]

I'll go with FLOP now just to look amazing if it happens. Good luck playing against adults without a forty yard run-up you albino Chris Eubank mong.

[Ian]

Do these "if x sign y then write off the league for the next decade!!!!" things ever work out that way?

Football's not as simple as that.

[Lewis]

Who was it last said about here? Andriy Shevchenko and Chelsea? The only other team to win multiple championships was United in their 'no value in the market' phase, and they could conceivably have done seven in a row if literally any of those big rumours (Benzema, Bale, whoever else) had come off.

[Ian]

I'm sure it gets said plenty, maybe the transfers just never come off. It's hard to tell because I'm so very forgetful.

I expect there were people saying PSG would never lose a domestic game again with Messi pissing hat tricks past Escargot SC, for example.

[Don]

Eto'o, Henry, Messi or some shit delivered, didn't it? Zlatan not so much.

[randomlegend]

Messi delivered? For PSG? Are you trolling?

[Don]

The trio, you mong.

[Jimmy Floyd]

The OG galacticos won the Champions League in '02, although I suppose Big Ron and Becks joined later and they didn't win it then.

[Shindig]

I still can't believe Johnny Woodgate wound up there.

[Ian]

And had one of the all time great debuts as well.

[Gray Fox]

This game has crept up on me. I was sure we were on late.

Brighton are for some reason in yellow at home.

[Boydy]

This game has crept up on me. I was sure we were on late.

Brighton are for some reason in yellow at home.
Ukraine, I'm guessing?

[Manc]

Don't tell Floyd.

[Gray Fox]

Could be Ukraine. But if it isn't, Jimmys rage over it is completely justified.

[Jimmy Floyd]

I originally typed out 'They're expressing solidary with the people of Sweden' and then deleted it because kit clash madness is a serious subject that should not be joked about.

[randomlegend]

The trio, you mong.

Given we were discussing players who'd transferred with the expectation they'd turn their new team into an unbeatable winning machine I assumed you were listing players who fit that bill. Given its you I suppose I should've guessed that's beyond you.

[Don]

Paragraph long whines over that. Go buy a salt shaker.

[Gray Fox]

Rudiger to Juventus is apparently agreed. They also want Jorginho too.

[Gray Fox]

Fabio Carvalho deal agreed to Liverpool. He’ll join on a “free” with compensation of ~£7.5m and a sell on fee to boot.

[Don]

I miss predicting the future success of signings and drinking in the plaudits for my astounding football knowledge and intelligence through the silence of my haters. Our worst proper signing (excluding Davies/Kabak) is a Japanese key starter who bangs in 1 in 4 for us.

[-james-]

Fabio Carvalho deal agreed to Liverpool. He’ll join on a “free” with compensation of ~£7.5m and a sell on fee to boot.


Ben Doak sounds like it's done as well. I watched him in a youth game a while ago and he looked like a Michael Owen regen.

[phonics]

Eden Hazard to Arsenal on loan apparently. It’s like we’ve got a quota on ‘past it Chelsea players’

[randomlegend]

1516421887613620230

Well, everyone else better pray he's as injury-prone as he looks like he might be.

[SincereTheRebel]

He has played in about 70% of Dortmund league games since his first full season scoring in 99% of those games.

[Don]

Geezer's got the flexibility of my erection so injury problems are to be expected. Nothing a medium term stretching programme wouldn't fix, mind.


https://youtu.be/F8AkBcoQ6PY