May football: Southend United relegated (nearly)

[Ian]

Southend were all but relegated from the Football League last night. I can't see how the club survives it to be honest.

A heart felt memorial in next months thread please Ian

You may remember from my expert analysis (https://www.thethirdhalf.co.uk/showthread.php?2607-Feb-Footy-Southend-United-and-football-s-demise&highlight=southend) of Southend United from last February (for fuck's sake) that the main conclusions to be drawn were:
- Charity is for mugs
- Football is shit
- Ron Martin is hirsute.

And things have only gotten worse. Indeed, if you google "Southend United" the top 'People also asked' option is "Why are Southend United so bad?" as Southend find themselves on the cusp of non-league football for the first time.

Per Spikey's request, this isn't the greatest analysis of Southend United in the world (I've already done that, after all) this is just a tribute.
https://i.ibb.co/F4WwbF6/image.png


Other football
Other football? Spikey is in mourning. Have some fucking respect.

[mo]

Recent history suggests that an immediate return to the FL is unlikely - you're either consigned to a few years down there, or worse, lower. Some Swindon fans recently have opined that perhaps a few years in non-league would be worth it to be rid of the current owner (we could very well face successive relegations next season and follow Southend out the trap door), but I think this is misplaced. Hang on to your FL status at your peril. Good luck getting back up, Southend.

[Ian]

Relative to those clubs finances is dropping out of the football league similarly devastating, financially, as dropping out of the Premier League is?

[mo]

Relative to those clubs finances is dropping out of the football league similarly devastating, financially, as dropping out of the Premier League is?

:lol: what's a parachute payment?

[Ian]

Didn't even think about that, so worse then.

It's a pity we didn't allow Florentino Perez to SAVE FOOTBALL, really.

[Shindig]

Given how covid cut two non-league seasons short, I'm amazed any of them are still standing.

[Spikey M]

Thank you for your consideration at this difficult time.

[Spikey M]

Recent history suggests that an immediate return to the FL is unlikely - you're either consigned to a few years down there, or worse, lower. Some Swindon fans recently have opined that perhaps a few years in non-league would be worth it to be rid of the current owner (we could very well face successive relegations next season and follow Southend out the trap door), but I think this is misplaced. Hang on to your FL status at your peril. Good luck getting back up, Southend.

At the moment seeing Ron Martin out the door would be worth the short term disappointment. Especially if there was the chance of fan ownership, but I fear you're right. Chances are this is the start of a lengthy absence. Potentially a permanent one. Financially this is a disaster for a club that has been on the brink of collapse for a long time already.

[mo]

Didn't even think about that, so worse then.

It's a pity we didn't allow Florentino Perez to SAVE FOOTBALL, really.

For context, Macclesfield were wound up over just over half a million quid. Your big six there probably spend that on re-stocking the team bus' snack bar in a season.

[Ian]

For context, Macclesfield were wound up over just over half a million quid. Your big six there probably spend that on re-stocking the team bus' snack bar in a season.

About two weeks of mediocrity from Savey Davey.

[mo]

At the moment seeing Ron Martin out the door would be worth the short term disappointment. Especially if there was the chance of fan ownership, but I fear you're right. Chances are this is the start of a lengthy absence. Potentially a permanent one. Financially this is a disaster for a club that has been on the brink of collapse for a long time already.

We've got this whole thing where Lee Power has been taken to court by Michael Standing and Gareth Barry - who have allegedly put up quite a bit of funding for Town over the years. Which they were not allowed to do. Power tried to put us in admin the other week, thankfully the court blocked that as there are potential offers for the club out there. But we just seem to lurch from one shithead owner to the next, so I don't hold out much hope for the future.

[Lewis]

Flush them all. Southend, Grimsby, Bolton... Good riddance.

[mo]

:yawn: so edgy.

[Lewis]

I've been saying there are too many clubs for years. Have you ever been to Grimsby? It barely sustains life, never mind a professional football team.

[igor_balis]

Flush them all. Southend, Grimsby, Bolton... Good riddance.

https://frinkiac.com/meme/S04E19/1034899.jpg?b64lines=IFRIRVJFIEFSRSBUT08gTUFOWSBDb HVicwogTk9XQURBWVMuIFBMRUFTRQogRUxJTUlOQVRFIFRIUkV FLiBJIEFNIE5PVAogQSBDUkFDS1BPVC4=

[Spikey M]

:D

[Reg]

Hopefully it's mathematically done for us before our last two v Man City and Arsenal. (Although I'd fancy us v Arsenal.)

Loved the Welbeck goal. Please marvel if you haven't yet: https://www.skysports.com/football/brighton-and-hove-albion-vs-leeds-united/report/429167

Also enjoyed the helicopter views of the Amex. Will be amazing to go back. Life is going to be weird and great.

[niko_cee]

Brighton have been safe for about a month, if not longer. The bottom three are hopelessly shit.

[Shindig]

Yeah, if anybody gets their act together, they can finish 12th. The only thing that threatened the bottom three was that weird spell Fulham had.

[Ian]

https://frinkiac.com/meme/S04E19/1034899.jpg?b64lines=IFRIRVJFIEFSRSBUT08gTUFOWSBDb HVicwogTk9XQURBWVMuIFBMRUFTRQogRUxJTUlOQVRFIFRIUkV FLiBJIEFNIE5PVAogQSBDUkFDS1BPVC4=

:D

Excellent.

[Mellberg]

For context, Macclesfield were wound up over just over half a million quid. Your big six there probably spend that on re-stocking the team bus' snack bar in a season.

I'm still baffled by this. Such a relatively small amount. Why no interested investors and why was it allowed to happen?

[Waffdon]

Man Utd fans have stormed into Old Trafford lol. Imagine there will be a delay to the game

[Lewis]

1388813850670026754

:lol:

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

1388845254607048705

:drool:

[Kikó]

1388863347609722888?s=20

RI in its element.

[Shindig]

Nah, R1 would be taking pictures of the boiler room. "These undersoil heating pipes date back to the Victorians."

[Lewis]

'more like nobhead woodward :thbgrin:'
'.....'

[Manc]

Lol at the pundits sympathising with the morons.

[Gray Fox]

The game isn’t happening is it.

[Shindig]

If they've dug the pitch up, it'll be off.

[Kikó]

Love the pictures from today. Wish I'd gone down.

[Waffdon]

Lol at the pundits sympathising with the morons.

Are you in your 50s?

[Lewis]

REVEALED: Old Trafford riot leader is City banker linked to Christmas "Super Spreader" event in Scotland.

Dawson, 39, pictured here on a city break in...

[Lewis]

'Redknapp's Big Night Out' Jesus.

[Kikó]

REVEALED: Old Trafford riot leader is City banker linked to Christmas "Super Spreader" event in Scotland.

Dawson, 39, pictured here on a city break in...

39!

[Lewis]

Stitching you up because you've got them rattled.

[Lewis]

Shitting hell just call it off so I can find something else to do.

[Waffdon]

It’s been called off

[Spikey M]

Am I right in thinking that if the game gets called off and the points are awarded to Liverpool, that would confirm City the title? :drool:

[Waffdon]

Why would City get points? ��

[Magic]

Dem FF teams doe. :harold:

[Lewis]

It would normally be forfeit, but because of the opposition it goes down as 3-0 United for invading a stadium without injuries.

[Spikey M]

Why would City get points? ��

I dun borked. Fixed it.

[Manc]

If United fans have HAD ENOUGH, cancel thier season.

[Lewis]

They could play the game at the end of the season in Dubai.

[Shindig]

These things will pass. You get some manc sean's going on about how it was a protest against the Glazer's ownership as a whole, but this wouldn't have kicked off without the Super League shambles.

[Ian]

Not having to watch United. :drool:

[Waffdon]

Souness still crying about the protests. Did he not stick a flag in the middle of the pitch in Turkey? :D

[Lewis]

Souness still crying about the protests. Did he not stick a flag in the middle of the pitch in Turkey? :D

Gary Neville seemed to refer to that as a protest earlier.

[Kikó]

I think manc and Souness have both been as embarrassing as each other today.

[Waffdon]

Just waiting on Manc sending the ‘imagine it was our fans’.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Souness :harold:

[Ian]

Souness was also on good form when he was pretending diving is a new development in the Premier League in the last couple of years.

[Manc]

I think manc and Souness have both been as embarrassing as each other today.

I've had a mare tbh. Get the tinnies in and I'll see you at the next one.

[phonics]

Genuinely didn’t notice any downturn in the quality of Twitter without these corporate accounts tweeting the same shit as all the others all weekend. Can they stay off?

[SincereTheRebel]

Inter have wrapped up the title.

Elche missed a last minute penalty which gave A.Madrid a 1-0 win. Two points clear with four games left. They still have to play Barca.

Lille one point clear of PSG with three games left. Lille last title was in 2011

Sporting are four six points clear with four games left. Last sporting title was in 2007

[phonics]

Arsenal are apparently bringing back Schezney which means I have to remember how to spell his name all over again. Nightmare.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Arsenal are apparently bringing back Schezney which means I have to remember how to spell his name all over again. Nightmare.

Cracking start.

[SincereTheRebel]

Shez Knee

[Spikey M]

Wasn't he Arsenal's third choice when he left? That's some career turn around. The Anti-Joe Hart.

[phonics]

Nah got demoted for smoking in the showers. Our 1, 2, 3 at that time he left are now West Hams best goalkeeper in yonks, Villas best goalkeeper in yonks and the other kept Allison out the team at Roma and went and won Serie A twice. It’s mental how good that team was in comparison to now.

[SincereTheRebel]

Cunts

[Waffdon]

Mourinho new Roma a manger. 4-0 on Thursday NAP

[Shindig]

https://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/motorsport/56966901

First Fabian Barthez has a couple of Le Mans drives and now this. Although I'm still weirded out by Michael Fassbender in the WEC.

[Spoonsky]

This pitch :D

[Don]

I think I'd pay to watch Verratti shag my mum. The turns and passing are something else. Kean in for that Argie lump immediately ffs.

[Lewis]

PSG look like a proper rabble. Marco Verratti and Dire Maria are the only ones doing anything.

[Spoonsky]

PSG look permanently offended whenever they’re not winning a game. End of the first leg was a better example but it shows through today as well. It seems like after seeing off Barcelona and Bayern they felt the trophy was basically theirs by right.

Best moment of the match so far was the commentator mentioning that Mauricio Pochettino’s son, Maurizio Pochettino, has made his professional debut earlier for Watford.

[Mellberg]

United, Leeds, Liverpool, Forest, Villa, Arsenal, Chelsea, Spurs, City (?). Can any other league better that? Any other country have more than five? Nice rotation of teams at the top with one or two constants. Shame money's fucked it, really.

[Spoonsky]

Rubén Dias is an incredible player.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Rubén Dias is an incredible player.

Just came in to post this.

He could well end up being up there with KDB and Aguero as their best ever signings.

[Lewis]

Chelsea vs City in a Champions' League final is put you off the sport shit. City winning would at least get us a brief Chinny comeback, so what can Chelsea offer? PhatFrank?

[Shindig]

I can only appreciate a Chelsea win if Franky Binman emerges from an actual bin to coach them.

[Spoonsky]

They offer the first American champions league winner :cool:

[Mellberg]

Germany - 6
Italy - 6
France - 5
Laligam8 - 4
Holland - 3

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Dire Maria :harold:

[Spoonsky]

They’re surely the most immature squad in living memory.

“It’s that Latino temperament,” says the co-commentator, who was reminding us an hour ago that there’s still no room for racism.

[Spikey M]

I wonder how hard Frankie Binman is seething at Stevie G's success at Rangers.

[Shindig]

He's needs the Celtic job, really.

[Waffdon]

I wonder how hard Frankie Binman is seething at Stevie G's success at Rangers.

He’s done alright but he does have the best team and still managed to bottle the cups again.

[Don]

This has possibly been close to a perfect match by City given the stage and level of opponent. Mon an Istanbul air disaster.

[CJay]

PSG are pathetic and should really be done for failure to control their players. City should be pleased no one ended up like Caniggia (regularly have to remind myself he didn’t actually get shot in the head. Thanks Wullie).

State of Zinchenko btw. How do players allow themselves to get riled so easily?

[Spoonsky]

This has possibly been close to a perfect match by City given the stage and level of opponent. Mon an Istanbul air disaster.

They’re an unbelievably good squad. Bringing on Gabriel Jesus, Sterling and Aguero off the bench ffs.

What actually happened to them last season?

[Don]

Injuries at CB. And then they try and play down our problems this season which are three times the magnitude :happycry:

[CJay]

They’re an unbelievably good squad. Bringing on Gabriel Jesus, Sterling and Aguero off the bench ffs.

What actually happened to them last season?

I get your point, but I doubt any of those 3 players coming on this season would fill a good side with dread.

[Danny]

They offer the first American champions league winner :cool:

Jovan Kirovski wants a word

[Ian]

Christ, there's a name I haven't heard in a long time.

[Shindig]

I must've blanked him out of my memory of 1996 Dortmund. Clearly Schott Boof was too powerful.

[Ian]

First player I think of in that team is Lars Ricken because his goal in the second leg of the semis broke my 11 year old heart.

[Spikey M]

1389580577838272517?s=19

[phonics]

Stephane Chapuisat is my random old player that lives in my brain.

[Shindig]

That name is fun to say. As is Heiko Herrlich. I was puzzled when Liverpool went for Riedle instead of him.

[Lewis]

Is there a gas leak in that changing room?

[Shindig]

Hullocaust.

[Spoonsky]

Jovan Kirovski wants a word

Great shout. I knew him from his later MLS days but I had no idea he’d had a proper career in Europe.

[Lofty]

Jens Lehmann sending ill advised messages shocker (https://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/football/56967418?at_medium=custom7&at_custom4=6FD3BDF4-AD97-11EB-A9F0-F5E515F31EAE&at_custom3=Match+of+the+Day&at_campaign=64&at_custom1=%5Bpost+type%5D&at_custom2=facebook_page)

[Spikey M]

"said he meant that, as ex-Germany defender Aogo was "very knowledgeable", he had helped increase the "quota"."

:lol:

[Lewis]

The only way you can know for sure he didn't mean that is if you yourself assume that he is in fact filling a racial quota. There's your racist.

[Ian]

Or you could just read the words he said, they were a bit of a giveaway.

[Spikey M]

I often mention people's skin colour when complementing them.

[Lewis]

The easiest way - the most efficient way, if you will - to differentiate him from the other very knowledgeable pundits.

[Spikey M]

I normally just use people's names.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Names are a bit passé imo, and problematic, to achieve a safe space it should be skin colour + number.

Obviously you'll need to go through the Dulux colour chart a bit. I was saying to Gentle Gold 4398 the other day, what is it with all these Frosted Dawn types giving my mate China Brown 324 a hard time?

[Ian]

Demonym or nationality + number, surely?

I mean obviously it's most patriotic to just despise anybody who's not as white as I am but if you go by nationality that helps you filter by white foreigners too.

[Shindig]

Identify people as a description you would give the police.

"I would say he had an Irish accent, yes."

[niko_cee]

Chelsea are going to workmanlike Real to death here aren't they?

[Waffdon]

Madrid team looks much than last week. Pulisic getting dropped is a bit harsh.

1-3 Madrid, Hazard doing a madness

[Gray Fox]

Hazard to go off injured in the first half. Chelsea to win comfortably by 3.

[Shindig]

We'll not know how this goes until Don drops an opinion.

[Don]

There's no goals in that Chelsea squad, don't be giving us that shit in the final.

[Waffdon]

Man Utd playing Thursday, Sunday, Tuesday and Thursday is a bit lol.

[Manc]

Joe Cole is good value as a pundit.

[Lewis]

I've explored the possible upsides of a Chelsea final win, and I've got 1) lol at City; and 2) setting Frank Lampard's career back far enough that he technically won't have been born yet. Any others?

[Ian]

Man Utd playing Thursday, Sunday, Tuesday and Thursday is a bit lol.

OGB will probably still just try and not change the team any more than he has to.

[Waffdon]

Chelsea are dreadful at finishing chances

[Lewis]

The Super League Deep State seems to be doing a number on all the streams.

[Kikó]

OGB will probably still just try and not change the team any more than he has to.

Van Der Beek should get a decent 10 minutes across the four.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

There's no goals in that Chelsea squad, don't be giving us that shit in the final.

Well played.

[Waffdon]

Kante :cool:

[Lewis]

I'm not sure you can criticise Zidane for this when Ronaldo has been anonymous in both legs.

[Kikó]

It's pretty impressive how all the big clubs in Europe have gone to shit at the same time

[Don]

That final is going to be stunning stuff :moop:

[Jimmy Floyd]

I don't know if it's the super league or what, but my team has beaten Real Madrid to progress to the European Cup final and I feel nothing.

[phonics]

So after a clear experiment. Twitter is much better on a game week when all the boycotting accounts weren’t on it.

[Ian]

Given we've proven we're the best there should be some breakaway league just for the English teams.

[Shindig]

Someone put our season review of 1995/6 up. I've paused it at the 12 point gap. You can see the end coming. We've drawn plenty already which means United must've been shocking in the first half of the season.

Academically, I'm not sure Kevin Keegan has tactics with us. The philosophy is there in spades (Can these players attack and have a bit of flair?) but there's bugger all positional discipline. I'm having kittens at the sight of Gillespie and Ginola somehow winding up on the same flank. Albert, Peacock and Barton winding up in amongst the goals loads tells you how fucked we are at tracking back. I can't think of a single defender you'd look at as a dependable rock. We'd not get a decent keeper in until Shay Given.

Still fantastic to watch, mind. We score some absolute pisstakes that season. It also reminds me how the 'Newcastle Sporting Club' stuff kicked off in a big way. United in football, the Falcons in rugby, the Eagles in basketball and that Lister Storm they sponsored. And the hockey team that did nowt. Madness.

[Ian]

David Ginola's luxurious barnet alone was worth 15 points, I'd say.

[Shindig]

Aye, he's lush. Shame Nigel Winterburn figured him out in the League Cup Quarter Final. And at no time am I ever sure of Steve Watson's position. We'll not the see the likes of The Entertainers(tm) again. No manager would cultivate that insanity now.

[Ian]

Also as with a lot of fun teams of that era they've just get gegenpressed into oblivion now.

Joy must be crushed by tictacs and cardio.

[Shindig]

Ferdinand would've destroyed Liverpool's high line, to be honest.

[Kikó]

Guardiola-ball is the worst invention to modern football.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Come on Kiko, when we were kids watching individualistic chumps like Cantona and Zola, we never thought we'd grow up to see a co-ordinated high press of this quality. It's synchronised running at its very best.

[Andy]

Guardiola-ball is the worst invention to modern football.

As a neutral i'd rather watch a Guardiola team than any other.

Can't stand teams that go out for an hour just to keep it tight and stay in the game. Our semi final against Leicester was the perfect example. We were too concerned about not getting humped and ended up meekly pissing away a chance at a final.

Pep always wants to attack and go and win for 90 minutes. Not many manager around with that mindset sadly.

[Andy]

Come on Kiko, when we were kids watching individualistic chumps like Cantona and Zola, we never thought we'd grow up to see a co-ordinated high press of this quality. It's synchronised running at its very best.

This is something we lack currently, other than Grealish there aren't any real individual talents you'd pay to watch outside the top few sides.

[niko_cee]

It's not so much Guardiolaball, but the modern obsession with possession, and the attendant sideways/backwards passing that almost always entails that is the bane of modern football. I suppose 'playing out from the back' has brought the lols, but it's still intensely irritating as a spectacle.

Guardiolaball is actually just massively out-resourcing all of your opponents, and pretty much always has been.

[Shindig]

One of the fun things about Leicester's title was how they did it with so little possession.

[Don]

Possession-ball and playing out from the back would result in modern teams smashing the shit out of the finest 90s sides so suck it up.

Speaking of Leicester, interesting to note Mahrez and Kante were the 2 individual stars of each CL semi. No fucking wonder they dragged Leicester to the league.

[Kikó]

Posession ball is fucking dull mostly though (or maybe Niko is just right, better resources and players means it's just a way of stifling the game for the opposition). A bit like Chelsea 2004-06, killing out games without the opposition ever looking like winning. It's not a good spectacle to have one sided fixtures.

[niko_cee]

It's not a good spectacle to have one sided fixtures.

Anyone for a super league?

[Jimmy Floyd]

Weirdly American sports is fixated on having as many one-sided fixtures as possible, they love and strive for DOMINANCE and DYNASTIES, with upsets or anything else being seen as disappointing or a letdown. That is one of the central tensions in the whole American ownership thing, sport over there is a completely different social concept to sport over here.

Behold this week's new story of the golf superleague (funded, I suspect, by the same people as the football superleague), should be an interesting case study in how far the yanks will prostitute themselves for moolah.

[Ian]

Who is it you think hates upsets in American sports? I can't speak for baseball but in NFL the people watching and reporting it love an upset or a surprise success as much as anybody else in my experience.

Sure they'll wank on about a Dynasty but so do the press over here, we just don't call it that. They still write "how will they ever lose a game again??????"-type articles when a team dominantly wins the league.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Do they not have an existential meltdown whenever two 'small market' teams, or those not featuring Tom Brady, get to the Super Bowl? Seems to happen in all the other sports there.

The only narratives they really like are strongman dominance (Brady/Jordan etc), a New York or LA team winning, or anything to do with a 'drought'.

[Ian]

Nah they just bang on about the history of said team and How They Got Here and whatnot.

I mean a favoured pastime for most of the NFL is lolling at the continued failure of the Dallas Cowboys, 'America's Team', and their owner Jerry Jones being miserable.

If a 'smaller' team makes it to the Super Bowl they tend to just dig into their history in the build up. Almost all of the teams have been to at least one Super Bowl and the NFL does so love its own history so they get loads of mileage out of that stuff.

[niko_cee]

There aren't really many 'small team' narratives in the NFL though, seeing as they're all part of a multi-billion dollar cartel.

Who are the small market lolbags? Jacksonville as a newer entrant (or I guess Houston/Tennessee by the same token)? Buffalo or Detroit as places of a bygone era?

It seems more of a thing in baseball from my extremely ill-informed perspective as there are established super teams (well, The Yankees) who appear to be allowed to outspend their rivals (to varying degrees of success). No one gives a fuck about basketball where I have no real idea what the success formula is, it seems some teams are able to aggregate all-star rosters somehow.

[Jimmy Floyd]

I was also thinking of T.Woods and M.Jordan (and probably others) as individuals, the American media acts around them like my parents' dog does when I have food in my hand. The same thing doesn't happen at all over here, the media are out to tear them down if anything. An Andy Murray figure would never be disliked there to the extent he is here.

[Lofty]

Is that England badge revamp a stunt or permanent?

[Lewis]

Devoting your energies to an 'inclusive' re-design of a thousand year old symbol of England whilst the domestic game almost falls to pieces on your watch is the best summation of this country's shithouse institutions possible. It will only be topped if they end up dropping it for excluding families with two lionesses.

[Manc]

Is that England badge revamp a stunt or permanent?

Link.

[Ian]

There aren't really many 'small team' narratives in the NFL though, seeing as they're all part of a multi-billion dollar cartel.

Who are the small market lolbags? Jacksonville as a newer entrant (or I guess Houston/Tennessee by the same token)? Buffalo or Detroit as places of a bygone era?

No, you're just talking less successful / fashionable rather than 'smaller' because obscene wealth is the entry point into owning a franchise in the first place.

So when a traditionally shit team does well it tends to be because they've had to draft well for years and ideally, for the media, made one or two big signings that have tipped them over the edge. Obviously a QB is the dream in that scenario.

[niko_cee]

Link.

There appears to be a telegraph story, but it's adblock sensitive.

You can see it on the official FA twitter.

[Shindig]

Finished up the season review and I think I'd rather blame the woodwork for us losing out. Tino was fine but we might've done better if we left Beardsley up front with Ferdinand instead of sticking Peter out wide. The points dropped against Forest and Blackburn were horrific, though. How someone didn't put their foot through in the build up to Fenton's second, I'll never know. Batty's complete air shot setting up Woan just looks cursed.

Barely changed the side all year which probably had something to do with it, as well.

[Don]

What's this Arsenal midfield 2 of ESR and Partey about?

[Danny]

You obviously cant take Roma too lightly but I am not sure why Shaw and Bruno are starting when we have a 4 goal lead.

[Ian]

Because the alternative is making changes and resting players and why on Earth would you do a mad thing like that?

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Cavani is a bit good and I'm happy to say that I was wrong in regards to signing him.

[Ian]

Same.

I mean, I still suspect Woodward didn't know what the fuck he was doing and just signed the most famous available attacker but he's been great for us.

[randomlegend]

Just seen this posted in response to Havertz's little bit of fun time wasting last night.


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p493yXNULn4

:D

[Shindig]

I'm amazed he can generate that kind of power.

[Lewis]

Lee Trundle would be a viral superstar these days. He invented Goals, Skills & Assists.

[phonics]

Villarreal are absolutely rancid and we’re not good enough to beat them by 2 goals.

[phonics]

At my local Chinese in Swansea they had a list what I assume was ‘regulars’ next to the till/phone. Most of them were in Chinese and then the address in English. The only name not in Chinese characters? Lee Trundle.

[Lofty]

Villarreal are absolutely rancid and we’re not good enough to beat them by 2 goals.

Good job we only need one eh.

Though the fannying around at the back is a bit hairy, Aubameyang looking a bit ropey with his finishing.

[phonics]

What was that ad about joining in the fight against racism by searching and reporting bad tweets.

[randomlegend]

Is that *Blink182 they played in the stadium when Roma scored?

[Ian]

:uhoh:

[Lewis]

One for Fred's titantron.

[Ian]

Get Fatty Shaw back on.

[randomlegend]

De Gea playing like it's 2016 or we'd have let in about 8 already.

[Kikó]

Ridiculous superkeeper cheat by DDG.

[Lewis]

Is Paut Orres any good? He looks like Victor Lindelof could batter him.

[Don]

That's the last time Arsenal appear in European competition for quite some time.

[Lewis]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5CtNLQeyDRM

[Kikó]

European final for the binman. Come on the ballot.

[Lofty]

Good Ebening.

Glad to see Taz's reverse midas touch meaning Arsenal will win the league, champions league and world club cup in the following 5 years, like Liverpool after they went completely out of europe.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Arsenal TV killed Claude for this. There should be a public inquiry.

[Manc]

Emery absolutely loves that trophy. Bless him.

[Don]

Good Ebening.

Glad to see Taz's reverse midas touch meaning Arsenal will win the league, champions league and world club cup in the following 5 years, like Liverpool after they went completely out of europe.

Even football thread randomers trying to take me down :happycry:

I'm fucking massive.

[Lewis]

Arsenal TV killed Claude for this. There should be a public inquiry.

1390003989039751177

At least they're giving him a state funeral.

[Lofty]

Fucking hell :D

[Shindig]

Really attack that roundabout, lads.

[Spikey M]

I missed that twat dying. Did he do himself in after he was outed as a racist?

[Lewis]

1390424382183510018

rekt

[Lewis]

That's Claude's coffin he's leaning on.

[Ian]

I thought it was very magnanimous of the Super League's Manchester United to give little Roma their night to shine on our march to the final.

Truly a force for good

[niko_cee]

UK government advising against fans travelling to Turkey for the CL final.

lol

Can they just get on with moving it to Wembley, or, I guess if it needs a more ethnic turk feeling maybe Ashburton Grove?

[Jimmy Floyd]

Two legs. One at Hyde Utd, one at Kingstonian. 3,000 fans at each, covid safe, job's a good un.

[Ian]

I think it's safest to play it behind closed doors.

Preferably don't even televise it.

[Waffdon]

How are Leicester throwing it away again. Liverpool and West Ham for top four

[phonics]

It's almost like Brendan Rodgers coaching style peaks in the early-mid season.

[Danny]

Even based on this thread I wasnt expecting that score :lol:

[Shindig]

I didn't even know we were playing. Those are the best surprises. :D

[Don]

:drool:

Don't fuck this up. Start VVD.

[Reg]

Drama!

Atletico 76 pts
R Madrid 74
Barcelona 74
Sevilla 70

And they all play each other this weekend. Woof.

Also Rooney's Derby against Sheffield Wednesday at 12:30. Last round of the Championship, with at least one to be relegated.

[Magic]

Dallas is unreal. :drool:

[Lewis]

Is Wayne Rooney a useless manager or are Derby just that much of a shithouse outfit?

[Don]

Rooneh, the thick twat, getting relegated thanks to Darren Moore. You love to see these wankers be shown up for the nepotistic cretins they are.

[Alex]

Dallas is unreal. :drool:

Our player of the season? There are a few candidates, but he's edging it for me.

We were brilliant today. Without Phillips are Raphinha for the majority of it too. Ran them off the park. Alioski was fantastic, probably his best performance in a Leeds shirt. He was everywhere.

[Waffdon]

Is Wayne Rooney a useless manager or are Derby just that much of a shithouse outfit?


Bottom when he took over

[Don]

Dirty bastard :sick:

[mo]

Derby stay up, Taz is on fire.

[Kikó]

Rooneh, the thick twat, getting relegated thanks to Darren Moore. You love to see these wankers be shown up for the nepotistic cretins they are.

:pards:

I wonder how much 'Mel' spends on Rooney, Given and Steve McClaren compared to what they get back.

[Lewis]

Bottom when he took over

The White Pele. :cool:

[Davgooner]

:pards:


Got the alert saying this had been used. Fairplay lad, that's great work.

[Mellberg]

My guy.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

What a couple of minutes.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Aguero :harold:

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

City :harold:

[randomlegend]

Lewis

We're going to win the league.

[Lewis]

I can't see them beating Wolves on the last day.

[Waffdon]

Reece James that second half was an absolute monster. Mendy didn’t have a clue what to do.

[Manc]

I see Sancho turned in a big performance. What a summer this will be. :drool:

[Gray Fox]

If Koumetio makes it onto the pitch Taz will explode.

[niko_cee]

I'm yet to be convinced this Ben Davies character exists.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

I'm yet to be convinced this Ben Davies character exists.

Who?

[Shindig]

Bend Avies?

[Manc]

Eze is a lovely player to watch.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Eze is that player we were looking for in terms of an individual outside the massive half-dozen that you would pay to watch.

[Waffdon]

That Man Utd kit really is quite disgusting. Didn’t realise they were only 3 points clear in 2nd if they lose this. Leicester and Liverpool next too.

[Waffdon]

Tyrone Mings belongs in the Championship with Stoke or something.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Watkins :harold:

[Waffdon]

Can someone ban Mahow from using that emoji. FACKIN hell

[Mellberg]

1-0 Ronaldo

[SincereTheRebel]

Arsenal sent down those baggie cunts.

AC Milan gave Juventus the business beating them 3-0. Tomori with the third goal with a header. Juventus are fifth with 69 points, one point outside the champions league places. Juve still have to play Inter, who have already won the league and Atalanta who are ahead of them.

In La Liga, the top four all placed each other and both games ended in a 0-0. I watched the A.Madrid vs Barca game and it is a typical defensive display from A.Madrid. They had the better chances and they should have won. A.Madrid are still two points clear at the top with three games left to play.

PSG drew with Rennes and Lille won 3-0 which means Lille are now three points clear with two games left. All the remaining games are against teams in the bottom half.

Sporting Lisbon can win the league if Porto fail to win tonight. Lisbon are eight points clear with three games left. Their first title since 2002

[Baz]

1391499891847929858

[mo]

Fucking Oil McBurnie.

Obviously not a good look for a professional footballer, but telling how there's no indication of what transpired before.

[niko_cee]

If they move the Champions League final to Portugal instead of England because "European football's governing body feels in Portugal it is going to be easier to gain access for sponsors and broadcasters" both teams should just boycott it.

[Shindig]

You'd think an opportunity to have a final attended by fans would help UEFA stick it to Perez and the Football World Series of Turin, Barcelona and Madrid.

[phonics]

Is there no-one from the North that writes about football? Is this why I have to listen to John Brewin bang out boring platitudes to fill a quota?

[Shindig]

Be thankful it's not Ray Hudson.

[Manc]

On the topic of football journalists. Carl Anka wants decking.

[Waffdon]

1391882332760596481

:d

[Don]

So good. They really have been the highlight of the season.

[SincereTheRebel]

That was sick :lol:

[Ian]

https://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/football/57069145

Guangthong > Brisbane > Bengal > Swindon. That's a disappointing next step unless it's just to add something more domestic and boring to then set up the next more exotic job with Orlando Pirates or Urawa Red Diamonds or something.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Orlando Pirates really should be an expansion NFL team, lack of coastline and intellectual property violation of Tampa Bay be damned.

[randomlegend]

United line-up could be fun.

[Lewis]

Getting BATTERED to indirectly don Liverpool. :cool:

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

That's some finish.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

:drool:

Big Mace is a glorious finisher and look at Amad with another contribution.

[Luca]

This Telles/Williams combo is a nightmare. Wasn't Telles supposed to be good?

[Lewis]

He was meant to be just expensive enough to put a lock on Luke Shaw's fridge but not good enough to actually expect to play.

[mo]

https://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/football/57069145

Guangthong > Brisbane > Bengal > Swindon. That's a disappointing next step unless it's just to add something more domestic and boring to then set up the next more exotic job with Orlando Pirates or Urawa Red Diamonds or something.

'Domestic and boring' might be the best review Swindon has ever had.

Twinned with Disneyland though.

[Shindig]

Southend said goodbye to Nile Ranger today. Good.

[Ian]

Is that because they've released him / his contract has run out or has he gone AWOL again and they're just crossing their fingers?

[Shindig]

The phrase used is 'sever all ties' after he skipped physiotherapy sessions to fix his groin.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

The lone Ranger.

[Don]

If Ings doesn't get a spot in that squad ahead of Watkins' Passion and Greenwood's Mixed Race-ness, it'll be a disgrace.

[Lewis]

1392207054195068929

Matey barely posts but he was posting anti-Super League stuff whilst everyone else was waiting for the agents to check their statements, and now he's going for the Glazers directly. :happycry:

[Don]

Get us a shirt, RL. Medium pls, ta.

They're lucky there's only a couple weeks left as watching them try to put the cap back on these cunts, having empowered them with this BLM bollocks was gonna be good fun.

http://news.bbc.co.uk/sport1/hi/football/africa/7822103.stm#

[Don]

It seems most of them have already come out too, Salah [with a Bojo tag], Mane, Pogba, Mahrez, Hakimi, Fener. The scenes when Mahrez and Kante burn a Star of David in the centre circle in Wembley before kick off :drool: