Football MARCHes on ('cause it's March)

[Ian]

Now that you've all recovered from the genius of that thread title it occurs to me that I don't think we did predictions or the mid-season report cards or anything (presumably because it's been the best year of our lives and we haven't had time) so let's do a condensed version of that.

GENERAL PREDICTIONS / THOUGHTS
Will anybody stop City winning the league?
Rest of the top four will be...
The relegated clubs will be....
Champions League winner:
Wafer Cup winner:
Will crowds be back this season?
Have you enjoyed this season / lockdown football?
Any other thoughts / predictions?

YOUR TEAM
My team is:
Expectations at start of season:
Expectations now:

Manager rating out of 5:
If I were in charge I'd sack them now (Yes/No) and why:

Team rating out of 5:
Best result of the season:
Best performance of the season:
Worst result of the season:
Worst performance of the season:

Overall player of the season so far:
The Didier Drogba Award for big game player of the season:
The worst player of the season:
The Tony M Award for most infuriating player of the season:
Any other comments:

[Jimmy Floyd]

My team is: Chelsea
Expectations at start of season: That they would compete in 38 league games as well as in various cup competitions; winning some of them, losing others, and drawing others still
Expectations now: Absolutely unchanged

Manager rating out of 5: 3 for Lampard, 4 for Tuchel
If I were in charge I'd sack them now (Yes/No) and why: Yes, because I'd enjoy the power rush

Team rating out of 5: 3
Best result of the season: 0-0 v Man Utd, which I think has happened about 7 times. It's important never to lose ground to them in the race for top three soccer.
Best performance of the season: 1-0 win last week over the Liza Minnelli muff diving XI, ft. a seething Diego Godin
Worst result of the season: The 7-1 defeat to Arsenal was a crushing blow, particularly as four of their goals were so morally excellent that the mainstream media couldn't even capture them on camera, so it's down as 3-1 in official records
Worst performance of the season: Probably me writing this post

Overall player of the season so far: Mason Mount
The Didier Drogba Award for big game player of the season: Mason Mount, owing to his crashing winner in the West London Derby, football's most fiery grudge clash. I've had 'bragging rights' over all my Fulham fan friends ever since, and indeed for the full 32 years of my life
The worst player of the season: It's a close race between Kepa, for being so bad that we decided to panic-buy Edouard Mendy, and Edouard Mendy, for being so bad that we are probably thinking quite seriously about bringing Kepa back into the lineup.
The Tony M Award for most infuriating player of the season: Tammy Abraham because he can't run or kick properly. He can do a lot of football things pretty well - flick-ons, shouting, that sort of thing - but he can't run or kick. Also Timo Werner and Kai Havertz, who I can only assume took advantage of a 2-for-1 special offer on the Operation. Werner's fantastically Aryan limbs no longer work in harmony, while Havertz still appears to be under the effect of the anaesthetic.
Any other comments: Football has lost its meaning to me. I hope it comes back with the fans. We're more solid since Lampard left, for sure, but I don't care, because the prospective journey is so anodyne. I'd almost rather have seen him drag us down the table over the next three years ending in a comedic relegation battle with Ipswich, or something, it would be more entertaining than the constant search for tactical shape which is modern football. Attendance: 0

[Ian]

My answers to get the ball rolling:

GENERAL PREDICTIONS / THOUGHTS
Will anybody stop City winning the league? Nah
Rest of the top four will be... Liverpool, United..... Chelsea? I think United will hang on to top four and the other spot could really be either Chelsea or Leicester but I reckon Chelsea might sneak ahead of them.
The relegated clubs will be.... Sheffield United, West Brom, Brighton
Champions League winner: I have an unpleasant feeling Pep might not fuck it up this time.
Wafer Cup winner: AC Milan once 98-year old Zlatan has bummed Maguire and Lindelof in the next round.
Will crowds be back this season? Nah.
Have you enjoyed this season / lockdown football? Not really. Even aside from watching United largely being like rubbing onions on your eyes (being in second place while invariably being no fun to watch is some going.) And I find it hard to get into any other games when I have them on because football without crowds is just a waste of everybody's time.
Any other thoughts / predictions? Nothing outlandish, though I think there are probably more VAR changes coming because the bizarre decisions just aren't going away.

YOUR TEAM
My team is: Manchester United
Expectations at start of season: Low. I suppose I'd have set the bar as European qualification.
Expectations now: It'd be stupid if we chucked top four at this point, but then I thought it'd be stupid if we shitted our way out of the Champions League after those first two group games.

Manager rating out of 5: Like...3?
If I were in charge I'd sack them now (Yes/No) and why: Not out of hand but if there was an obvious replacement I'd make the switch. He's not the biggest problem at the club but by the same token it feels like every bad performance and bad result are down to the exact same things and he just never learns. I struggle to see us sustaining a challenge for any trophies anyone cares about with him in charge, but then the same might just be said for Woodward.

Team rating out of 5: 3
Best result of the season: Probably that win against PSG, really set us up for the group before we fucked it and looked like Solskjaer still had a solid method for beating big teams before all the draws set in from then on. Honourable mention to the 9-0 just because of the score.
Best performance of the season: The 5-0 against Julian Nagelsmann's jacket was good.
Worst result of the season: Losing to Team Rafael and that fucking goal Demba Ba scored when a win against a not very good team would have put is in good stead to see out the group was grim.
Worst performance of the season: Getting bent over by Tottenham.

Overall player of the season so far: Fernandes, obviously.
The Didier Drogba Award for big game player of the season: Also Fernandes.
The worst player of the season: A few to choose from but it really has to come down to one of Maguire or Lindelof for me. They both just get constantly bullied and do stupid shit and I think Maguire's heading might be what Ant claimed Vidic's was.
The Tony M Award for most infuriating player of the season: As you might guess given what I named this bit, Anthony Martial. He's sort of become a parody of his early flaws. Looks entirely disinterested most of the time and isn't even doing the bare minimum. You see Cavani's movement and it's night and day. Martial mooches about, doesn't look for space, if he does get the ball just wants to try the same cut inside every time and barely even has the flashes of brilliance now. If United can con somebody into giving them a load of money for him then they should. Rashford hasn't had many good performances either I don't think but he is at least still scoring goals whereas Martial barely contributes.
Any other comments: There is some obvious shit in the team but I do wonder if a manager who had more of a plan than "pick the same 11 players every time and hope Fernandes chips in with a GOAL CONTRIBUTION" might get more out of a number of them.

[mo]

GENERAL PREDICTIONS / THOUGHTS

Will crowds be back this season? Yes.
Have you enjoyed this season / lockdown football? Fuck no.
Any other thoughts / predictions? A few more clubs lower down the pyramid will go bust.

YOUR TEAM
My team is: Swindon Town
Expectations at start of season: Mid table.
Expectations now:We might, just might, avoid relegation. Currently top of the 7-team mini league at the bottom, although Burton have just hit some cracking form.

Manager rating out of 5: John Sheridan - 0.5. Actively made the team worse and isolated key senior players. Old-school bully.
If I were in charge I'd sack them now (Yes/No) and why: No - only on a contract to the end of the season, 7 points from the previous 9 suggests some sort of form which might be enough to keep us up. Looking for a hungry young manager for next season though.

Team rating out of 5: 2. They're not a bad squad of players, they've just been horribly mismanaged.
Best result of the season: 3-2 against Ipswich on the telly, although it did bring a sense of foreboding as we've been here before. Beating Oxford in the last minute was pretty sweet though.
Worst result of the season: 4-1 home loss to MK Dons was pretty horrific.

Overall player of the season so far: Dion Conroy.
The Didier Drogba Award for big game player of the season: Scott Twine. Has a habit of pulling out a belter in games where we need it.
The worst player of the season: Taylor Curran. Allegedly only here as his Dad is paying his wages. Not League One standard.
The Tony M Award for most infuriating player of the season: Any of the perenially-injured troupe - Zeki Fryers, Jordan Lyden, Mathieu Baudry, Anthony Grant...
Any other comments:[/QUOTE] Richie Wellens can do one.

[-james-]

GENERAL PREDICTIONS / THOUGHTS
Will anybody stop City winning the league? N
Rest of the top four will be... United, Chelsea, Leicester
The relegated clubs will be.... Sheffield United, West Brom, Newcastle
Champions League winner: City
Wafer Cup winner: An English team
Will crowds be back this season? Sure
Have you enjoyed this season / lockdown football? I'm pretty numb to it at this stage. I feel like for the last six months my life has been scrolling my phone while BPL football plays in the background
Any other thoughts / predictions?

YOUR TEAM
My team is: Brighton
Expectations at start of season: 10th ish?
Expectations now: 16th ish?

Manager rating out of 5: 4
If I were in charge I'd sack them now (Yes/No) and why: I'm not really sure what more he can do.

Team rating out of 5: 2.5
Best result of the season: Any of the ones that resulted in three points being gained
Best performance of the season: The Leeds one last month? Basically any game against the top 4
Worst result of the season: Pick from any of the games that involved losing/drawing in mind boggling circumstances.
Worst performance of the season: Probably the recent draw against Burnley

Overall player of the season so far: Yves Bissouma is a colossus. March and Webster have also been brilliant and severely missed lately.
The Didier Drogba Award for big game player of the season: Lol. Lamptey for merking every renowned left back in the league perhaps.
The worst player of the season: I'm not sure who decided to remove Dan Burn from League One but it's not really working out.
The Tony M Award for most infuriating player of the season: Anyone who has stepped foot in the opposing penalty area.
Any other comments: It'll turn, it always turns. It'll turn, it'll turn, it'll turn.

[Reg]

James, Burn has had some great games. MotM v Liverpool. Against Wolves he was a calamity but a good season overall, imo.

GENERAL PREDICTIONS / THOUGHTS
Will anybody stop City winning the league? No
Rest of the top four will be... Man United, Chelsea, Liverpool
The relegated clubs will be.... Sheffield United, West Brom, Fulham
Champions League winner: PSG
Wafer Cup winner: United are probably the best team in it, but they have Milan who are maybe the second best? So I'll say Arsenal.
Will crowds be back this season? Yessir
Have you enjoyed this season / lockdown football? Much less, of course, but there have been some good games. Many games I look forward to and then feel completely unaffected by. No crowds has almost killed it. The Champions League's quality means it's less ruined by the lack of atmosphere, and I've found it does still often feel like a big occasion.

YOUR TEAM
My team is: Brighton and Hove Albion
Expectations at start of season: 11th. Always naively optimistic in pre-season, that's what it's for.
Expectations now: 16th

Manager rating out of 5: 3
If I were in charge I'd sack them now (Yes/No) and why: No, he's quite good and Pep Guardiola isn't available. Potter took an age to realise that maybe a somewhat settled team would pay dividends (think it was January when he finally named an unchanged XI); on the other hand he gets us playing entertainingly and, despite the often hopeless finishing, a possession-based team is more fun if results are equal.

Team rating out of 5: 3
Best result of the season: 1-0 v Liverpool
Best performance of the season: 1-0 v Liverpool; shoutout to 2-3 v Man United
Worst result of the season: 1-2 v Palace, 0-1 v West Brom
Worst performance of the season: 0-0 v Fulham (which has apparently happened twice, I mean the second time.)

Overall player of the season so far: Dunk; perhaps would have been Lamptey if not for his injury
The Didier Drogba Award for big game player of the season: Well we haven't been good against Palace, Fulham, Burnley or West Brom and I suppose they are the big games for us. I'll give it to Dunk for getting the equaliser v Wolves, which saved a bad run from being very bad.
The worst player of the season: Ryan.
The Tony M Award for most infuriating player of the season: Connolly for missing open goals.
Any other comments: It'd be interesting to know if 30 minutes extra shooting practice a week would help us, and if that would be an increase of 1000%.

[Danny]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2hyGFsUcplI

I love this guys channel.

[Mellberg]

GENERAL PREDICTIONS / THOUGHTS
Will anybody stop City winning the league? No
Rest of the top four will be... United, Chelsea and Liverpool
The relegated clubs will be.... Newcastle, West Brom and Sheffield United
Champions League winner: City
Wafer Cup winner: Erm...United
Will crowds be back this season? No. Think it lines up for the last game. They'll just leave it until next year.
Have you enjoyed this season / lockdown football? Villa are half decent for the first time in 10 years, so yes.
Any other thoughts / predictions? Nah. Too much thinking.

YOUR TEAM
My team is: THE Villa
Expectations at start of season: 10th-15th
Expectations now: Top 8

Manager rating out of 5: 4
If I were in charge I'd sack them now (Yes/No) and why: No way

Team rating out of 5: 4
Best result of the season: 7-2 Vs Liverpool, before they were shit and ravaged by injuries.
Best performance of the season: Has to be that as well.
Worst result of the season: 0-3 at home to Leeds, 1-2 at home to Brighton and 1-3 at home to West Ham
Worst performance of the season: Probably 0-0 away to Brighton. Really should've lost.

Overall player of the season so far: More difficult than some would have you believe. It's Grealish, but tempted to give it to Ollie Watkins.
The Didier Drogba Award for big game player of the season: Ezri Konsa
The worst player of the season: Erm, tough. Barkley maybe. He's not been bad, but under performed and not as good as expected.
The Tony M Award for most infuriating player of the season: Trezeguet. Grafter, but not good enough.
Any other comments: There's barely a player I can say a bad word against, which is such a long way away from all the pisstakers and has beens we've had on the books over the past decade. Really refreshing and I love it. Hope we can push on next season.

[phonics]

This should be a diff thread then the general football thread imo. But seeing as we're here.

Barca president has been arrested. That's two in a row now. Mes que un club.

[Mellberg]

F365 pulling out a MEGA STAT in their winners and losers:

"One of the more ridiculous Premier League runs in over. Stretching back to February 2016, Aston Villa had started 16 top-flight matches without Jack Grealish in the team. Their record without him was truly appalling: Won 0, Drawn 1, Lost 15. The curse is broken."

Four games since we came up. Leeds, which we won. Leicester last week and Liverpool and (I think) City last season. Most of it taken from 2015/16 when we won 3 games all season and he was 12. Fuck. Off.

[phonics]

F365 are such absolute wank now. They started the media revolution but think they’re still the spearhead of it. They openly acknowledge their social media is made to annoy people into clicking.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

That match was fucking terrible.

[SincereTheRebel]

Pirelli are cutting their sponsor to inter. A 26 year partnership. Which for me, this is one of my earliest football memories. It was R9 in a Inter shirt with Pirelli on the front.



A thing of beauty :drool:

https://i0.wp.com/thesefootballtimes.co/wp-content/uploads/2016/09/ronaldo-inter.jpg?fit=1280%2C869&ssl=1

[Manc]

You can almost hear his knee snapping.

[Reg]

Saint-Maximin and Almiron out until April. Make that Newcastle to join Sheff Utd and West Brom.

They'll probably beat us 3-0 in a few weeks with Andy Carroll and Dwight Gayle up front.

[Don]

Yep, combined with their fixture schedule, they're down. 2.75 on Bet365 too. Fulham's development as the go-to BLM outfit will be a welcome addition to the prem next season unless someone signs their ginger lad in midfield or the other white guy in defence and it all falls apart.

[Max Power]

GENERAL PREDICTIONS / THOUGHTS
Will anybody stop City winning the league? nope
Rest of the top four will be... Man Utd, Chelsea, Leicester City
The relegated clubs will be.... Sheff Utd, West Brom, Newcastle
Champions League winner: PSG
Wafer Cup winner: Man Utd
Will crowds be back this season? partly
Have you enjoyed this season / lockdown football? Yes although more as a distraction than an active thing. Us being good helps also.
Any other thoughts / predictions?

YOUR TEAM
My team is: Leicester City
Expectations at start of season: Top 7 and decent run in all 3 cups.
Expectations now: cling on to top 4 with our fingernails.

Manager rating out of 5: 4
If I were in charge I'd sack them now (Yes/No) and why: no

Team rating out of 5: 4
Best result of the season: 5-2 away to Man City.
Best performance of the season: probably above but 2-0 at home to Chelsea a more impressive all round dominant display rather than an old school counter attack.
Worst result of the season: 0-2 home to Slavia Praha
Worst performance of the season: 0-3 at anfield. We were flying and they weren’t and we didn’t turn up at all.

Overall player of the season so far: Youri Tielemans
The Didier Drogba Award for big game player of the season: Wilfred Ndidi
The worst player of the season: Ayoze Perez
The Tony M Award for most infuriating player of the season: Maddison aside from the two months before his recent injury was so inconsistent but really found a nice run of form. Schmeichel is good but he still retains an inabiltly to dominate from set pieces which is a big weakness for us.
Any other comments:[/QUOTE]
If we blow it this time I don’t think it’ll be a bottle job. We are just running out of steam and bodies. Need at least one of Maddison or Barnes back soon and Vardy to find his scoring touch otherwise it will be another promising if ultimately disappointing campaign. Another decent chance to win a maiden FA cup but almost don’t want to if I can’t walk up Wembley way. I’m sure I won’t have that dilemma as well lose meekly to United.

[Gray Fox]

GENERAL PREDICTIONS / THOUGHTS
Will anybody stop City winning the league? lol no
Rest of the top four will be... United, Leicester and Liverpool
The relegated clubs will be....Newcastle, West Brom, THE MIGHTY BLADES
Champions League winner: City. It's been looming for a while, hopefully PSG or Bayern stop them.
Wafer Cup winner: United should walk it.
Will crowds be back this season? Yes, for 1 or 2 games.
Have you enjoyed this season / lockdown football?Not at all. Results aside it just feels like you're watching one of those behind closed doors friendlies teams set up to trial a player/prepare for a big final
Any other thoughts / predictions? A referee to be assaulted or something similar after one terrible decision too many.

YOUR TEAM
My team is: Liverpool
Expectations at start of season: Win it again.
Expectations now:Top 4 should still be made.

Manager rating out of 5:4.
If I were in charge I'd sack them now (Yes/No) and why: lol no. He's been dealt a shitty hand this year, both on and off the field. Losing the best player in the league for the season along with all of his backups thereafter. Then your big marquee signing being out for 4 months straight away didn't help either. It still wasn't even going that badly until we hit the new year.
Loses a mark as he never really tried anything new.

Team rating out of 5: 2
Best result of the season: Either 7-0 at Palace or 5-0 at Atalanta.
Best performance of the season: 5-0 Atalanta. Palace game felt like it wasn't quite a 7-0.
Worst result of the season: 7-2 to Villa or 1-4 City. The former was everyone bar Alisson fit, but the latter pretty much condemned the season.
Worst performance of the season: Probably Everton last week. Never even looked like winning it at any point.

Overall player of the season so far: Salah. Still playing at a high level despite his forward partners taking the season off. Fabinho has stepped in very well to the CB role too.
The Didier Drogba Award for big game player of the season: As above.
The worst player of the season: There's a list full of potential here. But Firmino seems to have dropped down a level to the point where I reckon he hits the bench when Jota returns.
The Tony M Award for most infuriating player of the season: Origi. Sending him on now is live waving the white flag. He hasn't done a thing after coming on in quite some time.
Any other comments: Curtis Jones emerging has been good to see.

[Kikó]

GENERAL PREDICTIONS / THOUGHTS
Will anybody stop City winning the league? Nope.
Rest of the top four will be... United, Liverpool, Chelsea
The relegated clubs will be.... Sheff United, Fulham, West Brom
Champions League winner: Man City
Wafer Cup winner: Seville (even if they're not in it)
Will crowds be back this season? Yes.
Have you enjoyed this season / lockdown football? It's shite. Half of the fun of football is actually going and having a day of it. This has just been mindless drudgery.
Any other thoughts / predictions? Liverpool will have a premier league celebration parade despite relenting the title to City once the fans are back.

YOUR TEAM
My team is: Man U
Expectations at start of season: Top 4
Expectations now: Top 4

Manager rating out of 5: 4
If I were in charge I'd sack them now (Yes/No) and why: No. It can't be understated how much we were in the doldrums post Fergie. I think there was some stat about the lack of hattricks and games since we win by 4 or 5 goals. It was long. He's done a great job turning us from a pretty hateful bunch to one that looks at least able to compete on a regular basis. The overhaul has been impressive.

Team rating out of 5: 3
Best result of the season: The PSG result was great or Southampton.
Best performance of the season: PSG - Tuanzebe. Wow.
Worst result of the season: Either of the 0-0s v Chelsea.
Worst performance of the season: Arsenal - both.

Overall player of the season so far: Bruno or Luke (what!)
The Didier Drogba Award for big game player of the season: I think this needs to be renamed into the Bruno award tbfh.
The worst player of the season: Martial.
The Tony M Award for most infuriating player of the season: Oh. Martial again please.
Any other comments: Martial is a terrible player.

[Shindig]

Saint-Maximin and Almiron out until April. Make that Newcastle to join Sheff Utd and West Brom.

They'll probably beat us 3-0 in a few weeks with Andy Carroll and Dwight Gayle up front.

Aye, we're done for. The injury list (covid included) has made the season feel positively cursed for us.

[Lewis]

GENERAL PREDICTIONS / THOUGHTS
Will anybody stop City winning the league? No.
Rest of the top four will be... United, Leicester, and Liverpool.
The relegated clubs will be.... Hopefully Brighton.
Champions League winner: Bayern Munich.
Wafer Cup winner: United.
Will crowds be back this season? I don't know when the season ends, so possibly.
Have you enjoyed this season/lockdown football? No.
Any other thoughts/predictions? England will be shit at the Euros.

YOUR TEAM
My team is: Manchester United.
Expectations at start of season: I seem to remember saying the target was at least eighty points.
Expectations now: They should get second quite comfortably and they really need to win a cup.

Manager rating out of 5: 3.5
If I were in charge I'd sack them now (Yes/No) and why: I would not sack him at the moment because I think he has the right ideas and his signings have been decent; but he is not the man to win them the league, so at some point they will need to replace him, and they might as well do it before the wheels completely fall off and set them back a year. Who you replace him with I don't know.

Team rating out of 5: 3.5
Best result of the season: I don't know, but the late winner at Southampton was the best pop thus far.
Best performance of the season: Everton away was a genuinely good performance.
Worst result of the season: One of the European embarrassments.
Worst performance of the season: As above.

Overall player of the season so far: Nuno Nernandes, followed by Scott McTominay and Fred.
The Didier Drogba Award for big game player of the season: Scott McTominay.
The worst player of the season: Anthony Martial is the only player who has been genuinely shit.
The Tony M Award for most infuriating player of the season: As above.
Any other comments:[/QUOTE] Dave Gayer is done. He has 'lost a yard of pace' but on his reflexes, like when Iker Casillas started to slide at about the same age, and there is no coming back from it.

[Lofty]

Some facebook comment pleb rated Luke Shaw above Kieran Tierney, that's bollocks surely.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Best performance of the season: 1-0 win last week over the Liza Minnelli muff diving XI, ft. a seething Diego Godin

Just researched on this and it seems that Diego Godin hasn't played there for two years. I'm 100% certain he was on the pitch against us (I watched it with the sound off which probably didn't help).

[SvN]

Some facebook comment pleb rated Luke Shaw above Kieran Tierney, that's bollocks surely.

Luke Shaw has been outstanding this season. I'd written him off as a fat waste of space, but he's been one of our best players.

[Ian]

He has been good though, far be it from me to question OGB's incredible grasp of tactics, I don't think he's "plan B if Fernandes is shit" good.

EDIT: https://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/football/56243781

"Goal involvements."

[Jimmy Floyd]

Why is mainstream football analysis still so insistent on failing to isolate the contribution of the chance creator from whether or not that chance was ultimately finished? 'Assist', 'Goal contribution', 'Goal involvement' all make the same bollocks error.

It's maddening and there seems to be no end in sight.

[Don]

Portugal's front-line pipeline is filth. Jota, Neto and Felix with Silva in backup. Hopefully Ronaldo loses his spot before he can break Daei's record.

[Lewis]

Luke Shaw's improvement/performances have been over-stated. He's finally running forward with a bit of purpose, his crossing is much better, and Marcus Rashford is better with him providing a left-footed outlet; but he's still a ball-watcher who can be lazy getting back and doesn't even attempt to defend crosses (like Harry Maguire, his best games are where he only has to cover ten yards and can't get rinsed out of position). He's probably just about good enough for where they want to be, which might be an achievement in itself, but people have got carried away with it.

[SvN]

I think it's because he was written off by most as a fat lazy shit. He's become much better going forward, even if he's still suspect defensively every now and then.

[Kikó]

I think everything you said is absolutely fair Lewis, he's improved massively but still not world beating. He's still not getting past the winger enough and that's due to his fitness or footballing desire. He's still a million times better than AWB.

[niko_cee]

Is Wan-Bissaka no good or is he just no good going forward?

The only thing I ever hear about him is various folk on here bleating on about his slide tackling.

[Don]

The beauty in the likes of AWB and Maguire is their age. They're lumbered with having to involve them for years to come which guarantees they'll never do shit as a club in said period :drool:

[SvN]

Is Wan-Bissaka no good or is he just no good going forward?

The only thing I ever hear about him is various folk on here bleating on about his slide tackling.

He's brilliant at tackling in a 1 on 1 situation, but that's about it, and it masks a lot of his deficiencies.

[Kikó]

He's gone to the same school as Fred and Chris Smalling for how to kick a football. He's alright but he is never going to be a world standard full back.

[Lewis]

I think he would look a lot better with a proper right-sided attacker in front of him. Whoever plays there tends to come deep/inside too much and completely exposes his attacking shitness by leaving him a load of time and space to flail around in. If he could just run overlaps and float the odd cross in, like Shaw now gets to when Rashford plays, he would be a serviceable attacking outlet. He's fine defensively. He sometimes loses his bearings a bit further up, but that might change if he wasn't minding that space and/or covering Victor Lindelof.

[Don]

Norwich-Brentford top of the table clash at 5.30pm today promises much.

[Reg]

Aye, we're done for. The injury list (covid included) has made the season feel positively cursed for us.
Potential for heartbreak too of course, but the final day v Fulham could be joyous if it came down to that and you won. At least that's away from home - Jebus, that'd be too much for a first game back for the fans.

(Meanwhile we have the stress-free final two games of Man City and Arsenal. :uhoh: Wrapped up by then please.)

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Commentators have been absolutely GAGGING for Barkley in this game.

[Don]

Norwich-Brentford top of the table clash at 5.30pm today promises much.

Absolute poison. Norwich are coming up as champions though.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Oli Burke is incredible.

You could see him shitting himself when he was trying to take on Mings there.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

F365 pulling out a MEGA STAT in their winners and losers:

"One of the more ridiculous Premier League runs in over. Stretching back to February 2016, Aston Villa had started 16 top-flight matches without Jack Grealish in the team. Their record without him was truly appalling: Won 0, Drawn 1, Lost 15. The curse is broken."

Four games since we came up. Leeds, which we won. Leicester last week and Liverpool and (I think) City last season. Most of it taken from 2015/16 when we won 3 games all season and he was 12. Fuck. Off.

Shouldn't have dismissed a curse, mate.

[Boydy]

1367082325767462913

[Jimmy Floyd]

That is glorious. A grand at best?

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

United need to secure a saffron sponsor.

[phonics]

That is glorious. A grand at best?

It's an FFP scam. The company is owned by Robson Kanu.

[Lewis]

Nemanja Matic is a waste of a shirt in these sort of games. There is nothing to sweep up, so he's just twenty yards behind the play doing nothing.

[Don]

Grealish must be up there with VVD, Zaha and Jimenez in terms of influence and impact on their respective teams. Kane, Phillips and Lamptey in the next tier.

[Kikó]

One of the worst games I've seen (3 in 3).

[phonics]

Mellin brought this type of result on himself by getting a bit too big for his britches. That post saying he couldn't see Spurs or Arsenal catching up was death.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Basically every game at the moment is terrible. They all need six months off.

[Lewis]

This is a pretty perfect example of why Ole Gunnar Binman won't win them the league. How do you watch an hour of this and swap a defensive midfielder?

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

He has no plan B at all and he's too scared to take a risk.

[Kikó]

Very fucking obvious you can put Fernandes into midfield early and try and change it. Rashford has been absolutely dogshit tonight and has played the full game.

[Lewis]

Rashford has been shit for months, and he seems to be forcing it more each week and getting worse.

[Jimmy Floyd]

He (Rashford) never looks like he's enjoying himself. All he ever does on the pitch is scowl, gob off or sit down for a bit.

[Don]

Grealish must be up there with VVD, Zaha and Jimenez in terms of influence and impact on their respective teams. Kane, Phillips and Lamptey in the next tier.

Add Pogba to the latter group.

Where's your fucking goal collusions now, you cunts :happycry:

[Jimmy Floyd]

Manchester United midfielder Nemanja Matic to Sky Sports: “Palace played solid compact football. They waited for their chances. They had a opportunity to win the game at the end. We have to do much better, we have to risk more in attack to create more chances.

“We are Manchester United, we have to win this kind of game. On Sunday we have a big game against Manchester City. We have to refocus for that.

This kind of arrogant bullshit is why they don't win enough games. Think it's basically all Solskjaer brings to the table. You've got a badge on, mate, other than that it's 11 v 11 and no one 'has to' win.

[Kikó]

They've spat out that bullshit for years. We need to do better etc etc. Fucking do it then! You just had ninety minutes to do exactly that.

[Manc]

The Leicester bottle job is well underway. Nailed on for 5th.

[Don]

If we win tomorrow we're fucking coasting
to 2nd. The bus parade in June :drool:

[SincereTheRebel]

Rashford has been shit for months, and he seems to be forcing it more each week and getting worse.

Dinner lady ay he

[Ian]

This kind of arrogant bullshit is why they don't win enough games. Think it's basically all Solskjaer brings to the table. You've got a badge on, mate, other than that it's 11 v 11 and no one 'has to' win.

Also like the quote about United needing to find their "spark."

I assume he thought playing six defensive players against a team who were also going to defend a lot was the way to do that.

[Baz]

The Leicester bottle job is well underway. Nailed on for 5th.

It’s all about West Ham now. I’d love them to qualify for the Champions League.

[Jimmy Floyd]

West Ham at Upton Park in the CL would have been brilliant. West Ham at the Olympic stadium, meh.

[Kikó]

Also like the quote about United needing to find their "spark."

I assume he thought playing six defensive players against a team who were also going to defend a lot was the way to do that.

And we should/could have conceded despite that.

The race for 2nd-4th is so depressing we may as well cancel the league again like we did last year.

[Ian]

Yeah, we almost always still look like a bombscare despite being set up to be 'solid.'

[Ian]

Haaland has listed Manchester City, Manchester United, Liverpool, Real Madrid, Barcelona and Juventus as the only clubs he'd consider leaving Dortmund for, so I look forward to him signing for Bayern.

[Don]

The mad bastard has gone Kane, Son, Alli and Bale (BASK). Should be a cracker of a game this.

[SincereTheRebel]

Haaland has listed Manchester City, Manchester United, Liverpool, Real Madrid, Barcelona and Juventus as the only clubs he'd consider leaving Dortmund for, so I look forward to him signing for Bayern.

Add Werner and Havertz once they have one year left on their Chelsea deals

[Waffdon]

I don’t think Havertz has even played a minute under Tuchel. Poor bloke

[Shindig]

Shame we can't emergency loan him in and turn him into a regular Gabriel Obertan.

[Don]

I'll be fucked if I'm keeping on top of the handball rules but commentator has just said the same act that meant handball and a fine goal disallowed for Fulham would not have been deemed a handball if the Fulham player was defending rather than attacking. Well done to all involved in arriving at this shambles we find ourselves in.

[Foe]

Games gone with that hand ball decision.

Baffling.

[Waffdon]

VAR hates Werner :D

Must be the 4th or 5th tight call decided by an arm this season

[Gray Fox]

These offside calls for a strand of hair over the line are pathetic.

[Luke Emia]

These offside calls for a strand of hair over the line are pathetic.

I was thinking about it, should it be if you don’t score with the body part that is offside it’s not offside. Because the only reason Werner was offside was because of where his arm was but if would have scored with it then it would have been disallowed anyway.

[Gray Fox]

It used to be so that level meant that the attacker gets the call for the sake of more goals > fewer goals. If you have to draw these lines on the screen for a minute then surely there is no advantage gained?

[niko_cee]

VAR is just the worst.

Sadly I doubt there's any shutting the box now that it's out.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

England's future captain.

[Shindig]

I was going to say the technology's not the problem but it's clearly influencing decision-making in a freakish way. It's overcomplicating things.

[Waffdon]

‘Trent’ must get caught like that three times a game

[Gray Fox]

That's a cracking finish but what the fuck are Thiago and Kabak doing there?

[CJay]

That's a cracking finish but what the fuck are Thiago and Kabak doing there?

Fabinho cleverly showed him onto his right foot. Is that not basic defending to show him down the line? Mount was never going to do anything other than cut in.

[Waffdon]

1367578694382997509

He looks about 2 yards onside

[Gray Fox]

Fabinho cleverly showed him onto his right foot. Is that not basic defending to show him down the line? Mount was never going to do anything other than cut in.

That was poor too, but at least he went after the ball. There should have been at least some help inside.

This is end of days levels of shite from us now.

[Don]

1367578694382997509

He looks about 2 yards onside

This isn't the right argument, these are just deceptive angles, their line across the pitch should be standardised and right on VAR, it's the line from the players that seems to be completely subjective and open to corruption. How are they deciding where to draw the line from on Werner? There's not a chance that comes out as offside if they draw the line properly, I reckon.

Mount :happycry:

Get Jota on. Mane and Bobby have been a disgrace too.

[CJay]

That was poor too, but at least he went after the ball. There should have been at least some help inside.

This is end of days levels of shite from us now.

Yep.

We're playing a high line but Chelsea are walking out of our 'press' so easily every time. We're making Mount & Werner (what business would these two be in as a partnership?) look genuinely dangerous. We could very easily be 3-0 down.

Mané needs a few weeks off. Literally anyone could perform his role at the minute. He's totally lost his touch and confidence.

[Gray Fox]

Chelsea should win this about 5-0 at the least.

[Gray Fox]

What in the flying fuck is he doing now?

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Mane and Bobby Binman trying to turn a game around :drool:

[Kikó]

VAR is just the worst.

Sadly I doubt there's any shutting the box now that it's out.

At least there are no fans there to suffer from the bollocks.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

A serious goal THREAT coming on.

[Mike]

We’re proper awful.

[Gray Fox]

It's alright lads. Exact same team and exact same 4-3-3 again on Sunday, yeah? It'll definitely work this time.

[Kikó]

Worse title defence since David Moyes.

[Don]

My guy pulled Salah off on 60th minute and brought Oxlade on ahead of Naby. I mean if you want compassionate leave just put a request in you fucking nazi cunt.

[Gray Fox]

Salah must have either had a knock or done something tiny that'll have pissed him off.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Didn't watch it but Mase :cool:

[Waffdon]

Looks a far better player under Tuchel

[Dquincy]

My guy pulled Salah off on 60th minute and brought Oxlade on ahead of Naby. I mean if you want compassionate leave just put a request in you fucking nazi cunt.

:D

Klopp still breaking records. :cool: First time ever Liverpool have lost 5 on the trott at home.

[Dquincy]

It is weird that Klopp continues to stick with his 433.

Just feels like he doesn't have a plan B.

[Dquincy]

https://twitter.com/BeWarmers/status/1367603360153686019?s=19

[Jimmy Floyd]

Looks a far better player under Tuchel

He was just as good before.

[Manc]

I wonder how FSG are viewing this season. Must be tempting to consider it a write off given the injury list, but you simply cannot escape a lot of the players have gone backwards.

[Kikó]

It is weird that Klopp continues to stick with his 433.

Just feels like he doesn't have a plan B.

You've got the more successful version of OGS by the sounds of it? So many games it's crying out for a change of shape and not just personnel but he won't do it.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Frankie Lamps was the same in his second season. I think a lot of them are just so wedded to shape at the moment that in-match creativity is too much for them. In a sense you can't blame them, as everyone is completely knackered, so you have to have something to fall back on.

[Don]

My mans seriously comparing Klopp to OGS and Lampard :D

[Jimmy Floyd]

Your mans are (or is, I'm not sure of the grammar there) surveying the broken carcass of top flight football currently and seeing not a lot of difference across any of the clubs except for City who have the two XIs they can rotate.

[Don]

We'd be up there if we weren't hit with an injury crisis for the ages. Everyone else is as they were last season although that fucking German autist now has Chelsea as serious CL contenders within a month of sporadic training sessions :drool:

[SvN]

Injury crisis :D You've had a few sicknotes getting their annual injuries and one member of the first XI being decked by Jordan Pickford.

[niko_cee]

How do we escape this relentless cycle though? Euros in the summer. World Cup next winter. Afcon and the Copa are bound to be on 4 or 5 times in a year as well somehow. There is going to be no let up for years, or ever.

Liverpool just need to play Fabinho in midfield and let the actual defenders sort themselves out (or not) at the back.

I'm sure it's nothing really to do with him, but Thiago must have had one of the most spectacularly bad impacts on a team ever, if one was looking for such correlations. When did he make his comeback? The West Brom game? Top of the league and coasting. 3 wins in 10 since (it's probably worse than that)?

Hopefully the Leipzig game is in Hungary again. Maybe we should move all our games out there.

[Jimmy Floyd]

It will all come to a head at some point soon when there is a massive three-way war between FIFA, UEFA and the Big Clubs. Christ knows what the outcome will be.

[niko_cee]

Is 2024 still the end of time on the Mayan, I mean, International Football Calendar?

[Don]

Injury crisis :D You've had a few sicknotes getting their annual injuries and one member of the first XI being decked by Jordan Pickford.

We have had various worst states during the season but we seem to now have really recovered to being in the fantastic position of being able to field our 4th and 6th/7th choice CBs as a solid partnership.

At most recent count I saw a week or two back, our absences had a combined cost of 204 games this season, twice the amount of the next worst off, Leicester.

23 CB partnerships across games in all competitions this season.

Only 10 players have been available for more than half of the teams games this season.

Only 4 players now haven't been injured or unavailable for at least 3 weeks of the season.

These pundits and locked down soulless cretins who have been deprived of the clubs for 16 months are thirsty af for narratives and seem to think Klopp and the same players who have proven themselves over a sustained period of time have somehow lost it. It's cute but it's bollocks. How we're still in CL and likely to still make top four is testament to their quality.

[Manc]

It will all come to a head at some point soon when there is a massive three-way war between FIFA, UEFA and the Big Clubs. Christ knows what the outcome will be.

Hopefully the end of the sport.

[Shindig]

Newcastle United have failed to get the chairman booted off the arbitration case. The Club (tm) spotted numerous instances of the chairman withholding information regarding BeIN sports but the Court of Arbitration was all, "Heh. Nah."

[-james-]

The injuries have been quite convenient for Liverpool. They were pants after THE RESTART and up until Pickford chopped Van Dijk.

Either way that front line isn't winning another league title.

[Mellberg]

Not forgetting they sold Lovren and didn't replace him. It's not bad luck, it's poor planning.

[Luke Emia]

Not forgetting they sold Lovren and didn't replace him. It's not bad luck, it's poor planning.

It is, I know it's been a year where financial prudence was needed but making the exact same mistake City did with Fernandinho last year was negligent to be honest. Fabinho filling in every now & then would have been ok if VVD hadn't gotten injured but to go into the season with only three centre-backs and two of them having very poor injury records was asking for trouble. As soon as you take Fabinho & then Henderson out of the midfield it just throws everything else out of kilter and anyone could see that coming from a mile off.

The Jota injury was unlucky up until he was out the front three were being rotated and it was working but it happens. The defensive situation has then meant a total lack of rotation in midfield for the past months as Chamberlain & Keita also can't be trusted to be fit and now it's catching up because Wijnaldum especially has pretty much played every minute of every game.

[Mellberg]

Villa did the same the year we came up. We were 13th in March for a reason. Think it was Chester, Elphick and Tuanzebe for the first half of the season. Tuanzebe and Elphick got injured and Bruce ruined Chester's career pumping him full of meds until Jan. Fortunately we loaned Mings and Hause in January, as we were trying everyone at centre half. Hutton, Jedinak, Elmo. Couldn't defend for shit. Mings transformed us and then Tuanzebe came back and we were away. Fortunate though.

[niko_cee]

Maybe should have chucked £20m at some random defender (rather Thiago) but then, what do you get for that? Schalke wanted (still want?) more for this Kabak chancer and I think Klopp was (is) very conscious of not wanting to impede the development of the likes of Gomez. That said I was all aboard the Koulibaly boat last summer.

You can say they made the same mistake as City, but then, what was City's mistake? Not replacing Kompany? They had £150m worth of central defenders still knocking around the club. Being overly reliant on Laporte? He barely gets a game now. Short of having unlimited resources I'm not sure how you cope with losing all of your senior centre halves (City lost one) to season ending injuries before the season is even half done (and much much less in terms of the main pairing). Klopp should stop being a tit and just play the ones he has though, rather than cobbling midfielders in there all the time.

In other news, I see they've had to change the handball rule again. A Fulham fan might be able to help me with this but it seems to me that every time they get fucked over by one the rule then changes going forward (the Salah penalty), until the new rule, or another aspect of the existing rule screws them and then it gets revised again (this latest one). And they never see the benefit.

[Baz]

Get Mbappe and Haaland in a red shirt and ignore the fact that we’ve no centrehalves with legs.

[Gray Fox]

Kabak is now injured and out of the Fulham game at least. Normal service resumed.

[Waffdon]

Are Exeter banned from playing at 3pm on a Saturday? They seem to play at 1pm every week

[Baz]

Kabak is now injured and out of the Fulham game at least. Normal service resumed.

Good. Useless.

[Don]

Yep, that's positive.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Are Exeter banned from playing at 3pm on a Saturday? They seem to play at 1pm every week

Presumably the away clubs want that as it's a mission to get back from.

[John Arne]

Jesus Christ... Lacazette screaming (twice) like he's been fucking shot.

[mo]

Goal of the season contender there from Chris Wood.

[Lewis]

I only John was alive for this Rangers title.

[Waffdon]

Haaland on for a hat trick away to Bayern. Were 2-0 after 8 mins but 2-1 now. They’ll probably lose 5-3 or something

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

2-2 at half time. Lewandowski already at 30 league goals for this season.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Villa-Wolves a fascinating match so far. Second half is tempting but I've been reading up on auto-erotic asphyxiation and it really does look worth a try.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Oh dear Dortmund.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

9 goals needed in 10 matches from Lewandowski to hit 40.

[Magic]

I only John was alive for this Rangers title.

The scenes at Ibrox are just :D

[Lewis]

1368212694734671872

[Waffdon]

The scenes at Ibrox are just :D

Sturgeon will keep pubs shut until September now

[Magic]

They fine 2 guys coming up to buy a car from England but not a single rangers fan.

[Waffdon]

The scenes outside Parkhead will be special next weekend if Rangers win the league later today

[Don]

Klopp fully asking for the sack now. The two Williams' up against prime cut BLM talent :D

[Gray Fox]

That's fucking grim.

[niko_cee]

So is this Liverpool just sacking off the league in favour of the champions league or are they just being fair to Fulham (having chucked home games against Burnley and Brighton already)?

[Gray Fox]

Heavily suggest the former. I'd have expected only a couple of changes if it were the latter.

[Magic]

Hahahaha Sellick.

[Lewis]

:cool:

[John Arne]

I don't think I've disliked a Liverpool player more than I dislike Salah.

[Shindig]

I'll take a point given how knackered the side is but man, Fulham could snatch those points easily. Maja's eagerness is a big difference.

[Waffdon]

It’s a shame Lookman doesn’t really have an end product the majority of the time as he’s great to watch

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Great camera work whilst Maja was changing his shorts.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Salah :harold:

Deserved from Fulham.

[Waffdon]

That’s a lovely strike to be fair. Hopefully Brighton finally go down now

[Gray Fox]

If only anyone could have seen this coming.

[-james-]

6.6 still available on Brighton to go down. That Newcastle, above them in the table with a much easier run in, are about 2.5 says a lot.

[Manc]

Where on this earth is Ben Davies?

[Shindig]

There's nowt easy about that run-in. Our cutting edge is on the treatment table.

[Don]

Missed the first half but extremely surprised to find us being dicked on. Fulham 5/1 :drool:

Just what was the Nazi thinking? We have a piss east run-in and about 4 or 5 points to make up for 4th and he throws games for absolutely no reason? Where you at Stevie?

[Spoonsky]

It just feels toxic now. I'm even somehow worried they'll throw it away against Leipzig.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

1368579857223925761

:harold:

[Don]

Having watched the first 15 mins of second half, we don't look too bad. Naby and Jota could well see us win CL. Panic over.

[Shindig]

f anything, this dreadful run shows how much we Kopites are part of the team and not having us affects everything.

I love the BBC ticker. If crowds were in, all they'd do is boo them to depression.

[Lewis]

United are either getting tonked or earning Ole Gunnar Binman a new fifteen year contract. Fortunately I'll miss it. :cool:

[Kikó]

Lollerpool.

[Waffdon]

Liverpool back to being a banter club is good news for everyone

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

The only team right now that Liverpool would be able to get home points from is Ole's United. Easy 0-0.

[Don]

Andersen is the definitive VVD replacement, ridiculous how Fulham have managed to get him and Areola.

[Shindig]

1368568225416544257

The hell is this!? :D

[Baz]

Great camera work whilst Maja was changing his shorts.Should be a bookable offence.

[thommo]

What a performance that was. :drool:

Taz is right about Andersen, I don't know what Lyon were doing letting him go on loan to us but he's top drawer. Special word for Harrison Reed as well, absolutely everywhere in midfield and has been fantastic these past couple of months.

[Lewis]

1368568225416544257

The hell is this!? :D

'And the KNEW World Heavyweight...'

[randomlegend]

The stream I'm watching sounds like there's a microphone taped to the ball. Every touch is BOOM.

[randomlegend]

This will be the greatest heist in a while if we come out of this with a win. We're getting molested.

[Kikó]

Jesus, football is so dull without fans.

[SincereTheRebel]

Does BBW keeps Telles out the team?

[Ian]

Fatty. :cool:

[randomlegend]

Shaw :cool:

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

The fat one :drool:

[Lewis]

Dave Gayer can stay in Spain the fanny.

[Luca]

Great pick out by Henderson there.

[SincereTheRebel]

I see why

[Pleb]

City on the ROPES

[randomlegend]

City are getting away with so many fouls.

[-james-]

5d chess City throwing this

[Luca]

How the fuck is Martial a centre forward?

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Jesus looks like he's always on the verge of tears.

[Luca]

How the fuck is Martial a centre forward?

:eyemouth:

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

:face:

[randomlegend]

Sky giving Martial MOTM :D

[Luca]

Luke Shaw ROBBED

[randomlegend]

Brandon Williams has definitely cut his own hair during lockdown.

[Lewis]

Binman MASTERCLASS. Dan James has had them running scared.

[randomlegend]

1368601237764063233

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Man City GUBBED.

[Pleb]

If only we didn't drop points in MAJOR games.

[Raoul Duke]

OGB taking out THE TRASH there

[Kikó]

Hard to see how we aren't winning the battle for second here.

[Lewis]

I would be happy to just spend all of the summer money on attacking Quality going off that performance. I think the defending would be a lot more comfortable if they could take chances at the other end (and Dean Henderson seems to spread a bit of confidence coming for things), so tamper with Martial's brakes and go for the Dortmund package deal.

[randomlegend]

Haaland is going to end up at City I imagine :moop:

[Lewis]

1368644659849859078

https://i.imgur.com/f9jiY6Z.png

[Jimmy Floyd]

666 patients in Scottish hospital beds. 36 admissions today. It risks fuck all.

[Mellberg]

Surely Haaland wouldn't join United out of principal?

Should demand 300k a week and an apology from Roy.

[Lewis]

He's probably a functioning retard so give Paulp Ogba a fat new contract and it all falls into place.

[Shindig]

He'll join us to fill the spot Saint Maximin leaves when he goes to Liverpool. 40 goals in the Championship, second only to Joelinton scoring smashing Andy Cole's record in a single game with 50 against Bristol Rovers.

Who says I can't dream big?

[Waffdon]

1368644659849859078

https://i.imgur.com/f9jiY6Z.png

Their players are off their tits :D

Kemar Roofe has a video on his Instagram with his jaw left back in England

[randomlegend]

Surely Haaland wouldn't join United out of principal?

Should demand 300k a week and an apology from Roy.

He'd have to be a proper mong to factor that into his decision.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Haaland is going to end up at City I imagine :moop:

They'd be foolish not to. Aguero is struggling to stay fit now and Jesus just doesn't look like THE guy.

[Spikey M]

That's goal of the season right there.

1368659555379462148?s=09

[randomlegend]

Errrr, did you not see Fernandes' penalty earlier?

[Dquincy]

The City loss means Liverpool are still in the title hunt.

[Kikó]

I would be happy to just spend all of the summer money on attacking Quality going off that performance. I think the defending would be a lot more comfortable if they could take chances at the other end (and Dean Henderson seems to spread a bit of confidence coming for things), so tamper with Martial's brakes and go for the Dortmund package deal.

Totally agree. Need a younger version of Cavani and/or winger who isn't a forward (is this the English lad at Dortmund?) We are also desperate for a dynamic midfielder (don't know if this would be vdb) so it's not matic coming on and really not Fred starting. But really can't see big money being spent with the growing debt and gap in match day related revenue.

[Lewis]

In theory this is the summer to be spending big money because everything is going to be written off financial fair play until crowds are back at full capacity across the continent. You could spend two-hundred [plus] million on Haaland and Sancho (and sell it as bringing them over together) and balance it out along the line.

Was Donny van de Beek opportunistically bought on the assumption that Paulp Ogba would be going this coming summer? I got the feeling Bruno Fernandes was only bought because they thought he was going in 2020, which he probably would have done without everything; but now if he wants to stay it throws things out a bit. Then again you could probably play all three of them if your front three was shit hot and actually balanced across the width of the pitch instead of crowding the centre.

[igor_balis]

Their players are off their tits :D

Kemar Roofe has a video on his Instagram with his jaw left back in England

i just looked, crikey :D

[Baz]

Their players are off their tits :D

Kemar Roofe has a video on his Instagram with his jaw left back in EnglandLooks like snus to me.

[Waffdon]

Please don’t tell me both commentators are going to be women too. What the fuck is this

[Don]

What are we talking about? I can sense I need to be outraged and disgusted but it would help to know where to channel it to. Fucking women.

[Waffdon]

Celebrating international women’s day by having all the pundits, presenter and co-commentator as a female

[Don]

:vomit:

[Don]

Look at these cunts being made to press as a cohesive unit by a nazi cunt to incredible effect. Time and tide wait for no man.

[Ian]

https://www.theguardian.com/football/2021/mar/08/andrea-agnelli-champions-league-reforms-premier-league

I don't think there's anything in here that I don't hate.

Agnelli's monobrow might be top of the list.

[Jimmy Floyd]

All of it's hideously terrible, but he really does save the best until last.


Agnelli also stressed that football must think of ways to attract younger viewers in an increasingly crowded marketplace. “We could imagine a subscription for the last 15 minutes of a specific game,” he said. “The attention span of today’s kids and tomorrow’s spenders is completely different to the one I had when I was their age.

“If you take golf, if it’s interesting at all, it’s only the last six holes on the final day. You are not going to watch the whole thing on the TV unless you are a hardcore fan.”

And how long do the last six holes take, I hear you ask? Is that 'about ninety minutes', you hear me answer?

[Shindig]

Trying to attract younger viewers by making a golf analogy. :D

[Spikey M]

Also, 90 minutes of golf feels like about 100 hours of real world time.

[Jimmy Floyd]

This is the order of best spectator sports.

1. Golf
2. Long form snooker
3. Downhill skiing

Only the true elite can handle these truths.

[Spikey M]

I will allow you skiing.

[SincereTheRebel]

Let the young viewers do what they do. They watch football through FIFA Ultimate team. They dont watch real world games anymore.

[Spikey M]

Joachim Loew is having one last Scratch and Sniff at the Euro's this year.

It's unclear how The Germans will source their next deviant.

[Raoul Duke]

Joachim Loew is having one last Scratch and Sniff at the Euro's this year.

It's unclear how The Germans will source their next deviant.

When Herr Klopp gets LLLLLLiverpool relegated and it's up to Stevie G to slip them back into the Premier League

[Ian]

https://tickets.rangers.co.uk/PagesPublic/ProductBrowse/ProductEvent.aspx?ProductSubType=STAR

£7.10 for a 110g Dairy Milk with a Rangers wrapper, anyone?

[-james-]

I don't think Biathlon on Eurosport when I was 12 will ever be topped when it comes to spectator sport.

[Lewis]

We're up to our knees in Milkybar
Surrender or you'll die

[Jimmy Floyd]

I don't think Biathlon on Eurosport when I was 12 will ever be topped when it comes to spectator sport.

I was thinking of that but the aesthetics aren't quite there. Top 10 though.

Triple jump the best of the track and field events.

[Lewis]

The best Eurosport sport, which is to say the most unintelligible yet still followable, was sumo.

[Jimmy Floyd]

I once went to a talk by Jeff Stelling (bear with me here) and he said that when he worked for Eurosport back in the good old days, you were basically sent to a broom cupboard in Paris for a week at a time, given a tiny screen, and had to just commentate live for the English edition over whatever pictures they chucked on the French version, and you wouldn't know what was coming. So if fencing came on, he'd just go 'Fantastic! Look at that! En garde!' or whatever for twenty minutes, praying for them to pull it and chuck the ski jumping back on.

[Spikey M]

I'd watch the French shit if I wanted to hear "En Garde", Stelling, you cunt.

[Shindig]

Sounds mint, to be fair. I think they had a specialist in for the stuff like Sumo but it could've just been Jack Burnicle doing a funny voice.

[Jimmy Floyd]

The refs have got a serious job on now in the Juve game.

[Raoul Duke]

Haaland absolutely fisting Seville here. Like a 6th former playing with the U12s

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

That's a cracking finish.

[Danny]

Taz is gonna be seething.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Taremi :harold:

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

So Haaland scored but VAR ruled it out for a foul.

VAR also deemed that Dortmund should have a penalty for an incident in the box a minute before.

Haaland then missed the penalty but VAR let him re-take as the keeper was off his line.

Haaland scores the penalty...

[Don]

Jimmy called it after the first leg. Absolute disgrace. They wouldn't be doing that to fucking BLM but a softly spoken Muzzie up against the Ronaldo brand? It's a freebie.

1 more joke club added to the mix for next leg, hopefully we get them if we go through.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Get fucked Juve.

Start the waterworks, Ronny.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Ronaldo jumped and turned with that free kick too :harold:

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

This match has been mental.

[Waffdon]

Get fucked Juve.

Start the waterworks, Ronny.

How can a Man Utd fan not like Ronaldo lol

Man City must be 1/3 to get Porto

[Don]

That was such an intense last 5 mins. Such a shame no crowd. My boy missing first leg :(

[Lewis]

Juventus wasting two years of Ronaldo's career with bums in charge. He should sue them.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Italy would be a much better country if the whole Agnelli family just died.

[Lewis]

Gianni Agnelli being one of the all-time top geezers appears to have completely nobbled the lineage, like Prussia getting a century of wallies after Frederick the Great.