September kickball: The RESPECT edition

[randomlegend]

Rashford should legitimately have a hat-trick inside the first 20 minutes. Not could but should.

EDIT: phonics *Jadon Sancho

[Ian]

Well this is boring.

[Lewis]

Working out what why Chong gets to share in the Gomes/Greenwood HYPE is keeping me going.

[Ian]

I've been too busy trying to think what wrestling names I can give the centre-halves if Axel Tuanzebe gets into the team. Do I go for the obvious and start calling Harry Maguire "Smash"? Giving him a new full name of Bo Dallas seems a bit much.

[randomlegend]

That turn from Gomes was nice.

[Lewis]

Rojo > Shaw

[Foe]

Saka looks twice the player that Nelson is. Absolutely rough as but there's something about him that wasn't there when Nelson was his age. Kids going to be somewhere below Jordan Sancho but above Jordan Ibe.

He looked hopeless and completely out of his depth in the first half. Then when the already shoddy Frankfurt defence tired he came to life. Send him on loan to the Bundesliga and see whether he’s got it, or if he does a Reece Oxford.

[randomlegend]

Rojo > Shaw

I was about to say he looks surprisingly good this game.

The problem with him is still that he'll do something absolutely mental every other game.

EDIT: that Rabona attempt :D

[Ian]

I must have had a brief psychotic episode there because I could have sworn Rojo just tried a fucking rabona.

[Lewis]

He would be a United legend by now if he had played more regularly.

[Lewis]

Rashford has hit two 'conventional' free-kicks this week and they're his two best attempts ever. The sooner someone smacks that Ronaldo style out of him the better.

[Ian]

If I'd known the alternative was "United Road" on a loop for 90 minutes I'd never have complained at Old Trafford being outsung by the away fans every game.

[Jimmy Floyd]

You could always try 'ny-tid' or 'Man U' to the tune of 'Chelsea, Chelsea, Chelsea (Chelsea)'.

[Ian]

At what age group do United start training how to take a set piece? Gomes will benefit from that.

[randomlegend]

The worst chant is and will forever be "Plaaaaaaay up Pompeeeyyyyyyy, Pompeeeyyy play up" ad infinitum.

[Lewis]

Take me home, Webly Road
Drinking ales, in his chair
Watching cricket, and the wrestling
Take me home, Webly Road

[Ian]

Lewis donning the Webly singing section. :cool:

[Pepe]

:lol:

[Lewis]

Ian Webly went to France
They didn't have ale so he gave wine a chance
All his euros down the drain
Never going abroad again

[Lewis]

It's Webly, you know
Hard to believe he's not old

[Ian]

What's the tune for the France one?

[Lewis]

The 'Tony Martial' song.

[Ian]

Ahhhh. yes. Good work.

*goes into tedious drone about some actually-pretty-good French beers.*

[Lewis]

Name on the trophy.

[phonics]

He looked hopeless and completely out of his depth in the first half. Then when the already shoddy Frankfurt defence tired he came to life. Send him on loan to the Bundesliga and see whether he’s got it, or if he does a Reece Oxford.

As I said, he's completely rough but this is his 4th appearance ever and Frankfurt aren't bad. He seems to make the aggressive decision alot which I like.

[niko_cee]

Just seen Karius' effort from last night.

How as that man forged a career as a professional footballer?

[John]

The worst chant is and will forever be "Plaaaaaaay up Pompeeeyyyyyyy, Pompeeeyyy play up" ad infinitum.

Hull's 'mauled by the tigers' shit accompanied by the hand gestures of a six year old at a birthday party with a face painter is the worst.

[Spikey M]

I'm forever blowing bubbles has always cringed me off a cliff.

[Offshore Toon]

Hull's 'mauled by the tigers' shit accompanied by the hand gestures of a six year old at a birthday party with a face painter is the worst.
As if it isn't tongue-in-cheek. If nothing else, it's fairly unique so props for the effort. It's better than slightly altering a generic chant for each club.

[Jimmy Floyd]

I'm forever blowing bubbles has always cringed me off a cliff.

I like that one, probably as it presents the chipper downtrodden cockney image that I, as a sneering middle class bastard, want to see.

I am also a closet liker of 'YNWA', real shame involved there, although as with all chants the a cappella mid game versions are ruined by singing it way too fast.

[Shindig]

Yeah, YNWA is quite good. Very much a chant made by the occasion as well. Blaydon Races can't hold a candle to it because we barely sing the chorus now.

[niko_cee]

Good old sussex by the sea is pretty crap, but, in a way, quite fitting.

I'm forever blowing bubbles is ruined by the new stadium and all the wanky bubble machines (although I think they had those at 'The Boleyn' as well).

[Ian]

Newcastle should lean into the Mark Knopfler stuff. Do a full 15-minute rendition of Telegraph Road partway through the match.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Here comes Offy singing oldies, goldies
Jean-Eric Boumsong and Papiss Cissé

[Shindig]

Here comes Offy singing oldies, goldies
Jean-Eric Boumsong and Papiss Cissé

Jean-Alain. :dc:

[Spikey M]

Not for the weak of stomach.

1174701007831523328?s=19

:| :lol:

[mugbull]

The fuck is the context for that. He seems so chill

[Disco]

Going by the comment I guess he was holding a flare or firework of some kind. He's obviously in shock, give it a few minutes for the adrenaline to wear off and he'll be in much worse shape.

[John]

As if it isn't tongue-in-cheek. If nothing else, it's fairly unique so props for the effort. It's better than slightly altering a generic chant for each club.

Tongue in cheek things can still be shit.

[Waffdon]

Imagine giving that for offside. What a shambles.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

lol.

Spurs have been great value this year.

[Giggles]

Pochettino is some twat for hanging about there.

[Trancemeister]

City will hit double figures if this continues.

[Trancemeister]

5-0 after 17 minutes. The fuck is going on.

[John]

The clearly fictional Tobi Sho-Silva has scored for Halifax.

[John Arne]

Apparently Rodri has just been "in and around" one of the Watford midfielders.

[John]

Given how stealthily he tends to sneak in and come away with the ball it's entirely possible he's given one of them a quick bumming with only the commentator noticing.

[John]

'A smelly performance from Cologne' says BT's lovely presenter. That whole team has been spending far too much time around James Richardson.

[Max Power]

If Rodgers had gone with Maddison in midfield for Chelsea and United we’d be second. Think the penny has dropped to go attacking with this group and see what happens.

[Gray Fox]

I think I'm ready for Everton to go down now.

[John]

1175446181075456001

Some high comedy followed by an obscene strike.

[niko_cee]

Granada running riot.

:D

[Giggles]

7-0. Limerick are a shambles, may not exist next week, but that's a nice finish to a great season.

[Reg]

I don't know where we're going to finish this season - it could be no better than last year, one spot above the relegation places, it could be 11th - but what's certain is the football is so much more fun to watch. We were good first half and I won't tire of us playing all the way from the keeper through to a shot on goal, and big Dan Burn the marauding centre-back-cum-winger pulling off Cruyff-like flicks.


Granada running riot.

:D
I was about to reply with 'Atletico's season' before checking their score and the live table. Better make it Granada's season.

[Shindig]

We're equally dire but we've been through this kind of stuff with Rafa. Hopefully something starts to spark soon.

[niko_cee]

Or 'Sackysilva', as it's called in Portuguese.

City for them next.

It's happening.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Ed Woodward talking under his hand in the stands is a new low for football. Garreh Neville having a fit for effect as well.

[SvN]

Neville simply can't be objective when it comes to United. He shows himself up.

[Waffdon]

How on earth are Liverpool evens for today’s game

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

We're shit.

[randomlegend]

I'm struggling.

[Jimmy Floyd]

How on earth are Liverpool evens for today’s game

Ngolo plays, think that price is roughly fair.

[Waffdon]

Azpilicueta/Willian play and no Rudiger. Right hand side will be getting raped. Plus, I’m not so sure he’s even half fit.

Pulisic must be dreadful.

[Gray Fox]

I'm assuming Robertson has recovered. He was 50/50 to go against Napoli and didn't exactly play great. The rest of the side is the standard one for the big teams.

Brewster on the bench is good to see.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Rockin' Roy's exciting, progressive Crystal Palace outfit about to go above Spurs and United (and probably Chelsea).

EDIT: jinxed that.

[Gray Fox]

This is the one that will show if there's been progress. Chelsea gave a very good game both here last season and in the Super Cup.

The lack of away points against top sides is about the only thing that could improve on last season.

[Smjffy]

I'm expecting a completely different game to that of the Super Cup. We'll ease past them.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Mourinho looks like a seriously disturbed man these days. He must have last smiled in about 2013.

[Reg]

Neville simply can't be objective when it comes to United. He shows himself up.
He needs to shut up occasionally on commentary. It's matches like that that make me wish Alan Smith was co-commentating - yes what he's saying will be extremely basic, and at times extremely dull, but the focus is actually on the game taking place and not on a Sky employee acting out his own soap opera.

[niko_cee]

I only saw the second half but if United were worse in the first, god help them.

Hopefully the dodgy, error strewn Chelsea turn up today but I'm not holding my breath.

[Giggles]

How do you manage to get it as badly wrong as Utd have with so much outlay? Is it all in Woodward and, if so, how does he keep his job? Surely the goodwill they live off from the Ferguson years for commercial deals can't last forever if they keep regressing.

[Gray Fox]

That's an emphatic free kick.

[Jimmy Floyd]

We are really decent going forward, complete bomb scare at the back though. This will finish 2-4 or similar.

[Kikó]

How do you manage to get it as badly wrong as Utd have with so much outlay? Is it all in Woodward and, if so, how does he keep his job? Surely the goodwill they live off from the Ferguson years for commercial deals can't last forever if they keep regressing.

It's purely the money with the owners so until that stops, Ed remains. He's untouchable.

I'm not surprised united with their mid table team lost against a team at the same level.

[Waffdon]

We are really decent going forward, complete bomb scare at the back though. This will finish 2-4 or similar.

Optimistic. Mount is pointless on the wing and the less said about the other winger the better.

[Waffdon]

Abraham not squaring it there :face:

[Jimmy Floyd]

That is absolute bullshit. There were about 15 touches after that.

[Giggles]

It's purely the money with the owners so until that stops, Ed remains. He's untouchable.

I'm not surprised united with their mid table team lost against a team at the same level.

Have they not got the foresight to know that another 10 years of mediocrity will lead to the incoming money drying up? Maybe they’re on for selling up before that or something.

[Waffdon]

VAR is the worst thing to ever exist.

[Max Power]

So glad we have this system that seems to solely exist to disallow goals.

[Waffdon]

That wasn’t inevitable.

[Jimmy Floyd]

It's got to go. It completely takes over everything and destroys the natural rhythm of the game. 'The correct decision' is not important except in about 10-20% of cases where there is a shocking howler by the refs.

[Serj]

I'm loving this.

[Gray Fox]

Get that Italian rat off my Captain.

[Waffdon]

Zouma is on. This could get ugly and quick.

[phonics]

Maitland-Niles is the king of being sent off for absolutely nothing. Pathetic refereeing. How does the sport work if literally foul is a yellow card?

[Gray Fox]

Martin Tyler sounds inconsolable that Liverpool are winning.

[Jimmy Floyd]

It's not that, he just (rightly) hates VAR.

[Giggles]

I always thought it would be money eventually killed the sport but along comes VAR.

[Waffdon]

Martin Tyler sounds inconsolable that Liverpool are winning.

I always thought he was a Liverpool fan.

[Jimmy Floyd]

He's a Woking fan.

[Serj]

VAR has its problems, but this application of it was perfectly fine. But then I would say that as a Liverpool fan.

[Jimmy Floyd]

How far back into a move do you go? There were about 3 shots/saves between that and the ball going in. We had a goal allowed against Norwich when there was an offside at a similar point, maybe even later, but the refs deemed that a new 'phase' had started.

[phonics]

Maitland-Niles is the king of being sent off for absolutely nothing. Pathetic refereeing. How does the sport work if literally foul is a yellow card?

Villa player didn't get a yellow card for giving a penalty away :cab:

[phonics]

Villa player didn't get a yellow card for giving a penalty away :cab:

Lol who cares I give up. Fuck this team.

[Serj]

How far back into a move do you go? There were about 3 shots/saves between that and the ball going in. We had a goal allowed against Norwich when there was an offside at a similar point, maybe even later, but the refs deemed that a new 'phase' had started.

I agree it should be clearly defined (or as clearly as possible, considering football rules are usually rather vague) and applied with consistency. I don't feel they went back egregiously far in the instance today.

[phonics]

Dani Ceballos has just had two corners cleared by the first man in a row.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Looks like Hazard left his talent at Cobham and Kanté has spent the last month injecting it into himself.

[Serj]

That was amazing. And to think I sold him in Fantasy Football.

[Mellberg]

Phonics seething :D

[Gray Fox]

Quality from Kante. We've tried to shut the game down too early here.

[phonics]

I’m seething at our own shitness tbf.

Although is that a second pen? I literally don’t understand the handball rule now so I have to ask.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Quality from Kante. We've tried to shut the game down too early here.

I don't understand it, if you just carried on like the first half you would surely have had an opening for the third. As it is you have given us a sniff and especially that point when Henderson needlessly blew up in the ref's face for a few minutes (leaders have to stay calm).

[Mellberg]

I deserved that :(

[bruhnaldo]

I deserved that :(

I blame you entirely.

[Kikó]

Have they not got the foresight to know that another 10 years of mediocrity will lead to the incoming money drying up? Maybe they’re on for selling up before that or something.

He's came out and said our on field performance is not related to the marketability of the club (and keep the sponsor gravy train rolling). He sees us as a Disneyland type company who will always have the fans flocking in to see the brand.

He's absolutely wrong.

[Serj]

Salah is just going to keep running into people today, isn't he.

[phonics]

I deserved that :(

:)

[phonics]

:)

I posted that about 10 seconds before a VAR check for a Villa penalty. I'm gonna shut up.

[Giggles]

He's came out and said our on field performance is not related to the marketability of the club (and keep the sponsor gravy train rolling). He sees us as a Disneyland type company who will always have the fans flocking in to see the brand.

He's absolutely wrong.

He sounds like a complete idiot.

[Serj]

Why not play the advantage there?

[John Arne]

1175812148775309312

I'm really starting to dislike Geundouzi, too - the sniveling little cunt.

[Gray Fox]

Nearly threw it away there. Everything after about 55 mins was ugly.

[Jimmy Floyd]

We were excellent in the second half, slightly unlucky not to get a point in the end. If we can gradually learn how to defend we'll be fine. I love Tomori, find of a season with a number of early finds. Christensen is a worry as his error-proneness hasn't really improved in the 50 odd games he's had.

[phonics]

Dean Smith going full ‘everything that went for us is correct and everything against us is wrong’ is what I needed to get back of the Arsenal bus.

[Vercetti]

I was confident that Clinton Morrison had already maxed out his 'wanker' rating, then he comes out as Spurs.

[John]

1175852433521745920

Just occasionally Roy Keane justifies his existence.

[Jimmy Floyd]

That studio really needed an Ian Wright or someone to lighten it the hell up. Football is not serious ffs.

[mo]

That studio really needed an Ian Wright or someone to lighten it the hell up. Football is not serious ffs.

That room would struggle to get much ‘lighter’ in all fairness.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Surprised they didn't just put an empty chair out to mourn Alex Scott's temporary defection to Strictly.

[bruhnaldo]

Mmmmmm. Alex Scott. :drool:

[Ian]

That studio really needed an Ian Wright or someone to lighten it the hell up. Football is not serious ffs.

Yeah as soon as I saw that line-up I noped out of listening to any of it.

[SincereTheRebel]

:lol:

https://www.skysports.com/football/news/11679/11817648/bernardo-silva-kick-it-out-condemn-manchester-city-midfielders-deleted-tweet

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Lol.

[Waffdon]

He’ll get banned no doubt. Britain is a shambles.

[mugbull]

There is a nice middle ground somewhere between England and Italy but for some reason everyone is avoiding it

[bruhnaldo]

That damn cartoon chocolate mascot looks racist as FUCK but why on earth would you ever share that on twitter lmao

You can joke with your friends but especially in 2019 come on man lol

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

That damn cartoon chocolate mascot looks racist as FUCK but why on earth would you ever share that on twitter lmao

You can joke with your friends but especially in 2019 come on man lol

He could have just shared it in the inevitable WhatsApp group.

[Jimmy Floyd]

14 match ban and chained to a transatlantic flight imo. 5 match ban for Mendy failing to report him to the authorities.

[bruhnaldo]

Odd response but ok.

[phonics]

I thought the 'Mendy is walking around the place naked, it's crazy, look at this guy' only to show Mendy wearing a black t-shirt and black shorts was far worse but is all very symptomatic of the Spanish/Portuguese/Latinx love of casual racism as banter.

[Waffdon]

Yeah I’m surprised it’s not that he got pulled up on. He’s clearly fine with it though so who cares

[Spikey M]

Intent matters. They're mates. I bet it's only peckerwoods that are getting their panties all knotted over it.

[phonics]

Intent matters. They're mates. I bet it's only peckerwoods that are getting their panties all knotted over it.

I mean this is a stupid point that falls apart within seconds.

Football fans doing monkey chants is okay because their intent is not to be racist but to put the player off their game?

Intent matters between two people. This was tweeted to an audience of over half a million people.

[bruhnaldo]

Right, like... clearly the two people involved enjoy that type of relationship but at some level to expect everyone on Earth to get in on the joke seems a bit... idk out of touch at best?

[Giggles]

Right, like... clearly the two people involved enjoy that type of relationship but at some level to expect everyone on Earth to get in on the joke seems a bit... idk out of touch at best?

Unfortunately it probably can’t be the case but it really should be nobody else’s fucking business.

[phonics]

Unfortunately it probably can’t be the case but it really should be nobody else’s fucking business.

What the fuck is this on about? He posted it to a public forum.

[Giggles]

What the fuck is this on about? He posted it to a public forum.

To another person. That wasn’t offended.

[phonics]

Coming from the bloke who has an absolute shit fit the moment he detects a whiff of anti-Irish sentiment that the person wasn't even implying.

[Giggles]

Coming from the bloke who has an absolute shit fit the moment he detects a whiff of anti-Irish sentiment that the person wasn't even implying.

Merely correct observations. I'm not looking anyone removed from their position because of it.

[phonics]

Ah yes, Bernardo Silva is definitely facing the sack.

[Giggles]

Ah yes, Bernardo Silva is definitely facing the sack.

There's plenty howling for it.

[phonics]

How many is plenty in your world, and can you show me so?

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

He'll get a fine and rightly so.

It doesn't matter if Mendy doesn't mind, he's said the joke on a platform where millions can see. If he wanted a bit of 'BANTERSAURAUS MATE' then he could have done it privately. I'm sure he's got his number.

[niko_cee]

Marcelo and Modric in this FIFA mens team of the year jobbie. Am I missing something?

[phonics]

They still have some bribes in the account from when Ronaldo was there.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Marcelo is a belter of a pick. Even if you don't want to give it to the season's standout left back from the team that won the European Cup, you could just default it to Jordi Alba and that would be 10 times better.

Is Modric even first choice?

[niko_cee]

Ramos is another :cab: choice unless this somehow factors in the 2018 Champions League. Real were absolute gak last season. Worst league performance in a decade, mugged out of the European Cup by a minnow, humiliated in the domestic cup, Spain were shite, Croatia were worse and Marcelo didn't even make the Brazil Copa squad. Mind bottling.

[Spikey M]

Modric was the player of the World Cup, wasn't he? It's all he's done, but that's probably why he's in there.

[SvN]

The world cup was well over a year ago.

[SincereTheRebel]

Just looking at random stats, as I do. C.Ronaldo won two league title in Madrid. I would have guessed he was on five.

[niko_cee]

Modric was the player of the World Cup, wasn't he? It's all he's done, but that's probably why he's in there.

Hence why he was world player of the year last year.

I know it's meaningless rubbish, but if they're just going to copy and paste it year on year why do they even bother?

[Andy]

Anyone know where I can stream the saints game on my phone this evening?

[Waffdon]

I’ll get you a link later if I remember.

[Dan]

Off to Pompey/Saints this evening :uhoh:

[randomlegend]

Off to Pompey/Saints this evening :uhoh:

Be a good lad and stream it to Andy.

[Dan]

😀

I’d love to, but I’m not sure my phone battery will last

[Lewis]

I got the train back into Fratton about an hour ago and it's crawling with police. Not sure why. Everyone not in skinny jeans would have heart failure if it KICKED OFF.

[Dan]

We’re four rows from the front at pitch level by the edge of the Fratton End penalty area :drool:

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Pitch invasion it.

[Dan]

We’ve just spotted the pitch side mic about 5 metres away from us. If you hear a random screech during the game it’s probably me hiccuping.

Should’ve brought a TTH sign

[Spikey M]

Shout 'Come back Magic' for the lads.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Hopefully you forgot your set of bells this time.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Shout 'Come back Magic' for the lads.

Better yet 'Thumb it in, Magic'.

[Waffdon]

Anyone know where I can stream the saints game on my phone this evening?

https://www.vipstand.se/tag/portsmouth-live-sports-stream

Works fine once the AD finishes

[Dan]

Hmm, not going to plan.

[Dan]

Hmm, not going to plan.

Nope.

[Lewis]

It's raining as well. lol at Tottenham.

[Smjffy]

:D Spurs.

[Andy]

What a day. Not even bothered that I missed the game, in future I'll never book a holiday during the season.

Incredible.

Imagine being Danny Ings, born and raised in Southampton, fan all his life and scoring twice against Pompey. Geezer.

[Spikey M]

The 'fan all his life' bit might be over egging it considering he left for a Liverpool side that was finishing about 5 places above you at the time.

[Waffdon]

The 'fan all his life' bit might be over egging it considering he left for a Liverpool side that was finishing about 5 places above you at the time.

Lol what does that matter

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Was he also a fan just out of the womb?

[niko_cee]

The 'fan all his life' bit might be over egging it considering he left for a Liverpool side that was finishing about 5 places above you at the time.

He left Burnley for Liverpool. And was it Bournemouth before them?

[Dan]

I've barely watched any football in the last 5-10 years, but I think we're not a very good football team.

Everything looked pretty aimless, with basically every pass being a hoof thirty yards up the field to one guy on his own with no support to either chase it down in vain or flick it on to nobody. Ryan Williams was the only player who gave a good account of himself, and even he basically just ran down the right hand side of the pitch a lot with basically no production.

You could easily see the difference between the two teams mentally. Everything takes one or two touches more for us than for the Southampton players, and we were a lot less composed at both ends of the pitch. We also really lack any kind of creativity, and there were a few occasions when we had three players all standing next to each other with the ball with no idea what to do.

Obviously, getting plastered by a team that's about 70 places higher than us in the football pyramid isn't exactly something to go ballistic about, but the feeling that there's no real plan when we have the ball, and that nothing is really being done to switch things up in terms of tactics or individual matchups, is the major concern that I left with. The only tactical decision that looked to have been made today was to play a striker at CB, which feels like trying to be far too cute for no reason. I'm not sure if it's been this way every week, but I seem to remember having a similar thought when we went to the Coventry game at the end of last season, and if that's the case then we really ought to be asking questions of Kenny Jackett.

EDIT: Should also point out that the support was phenomenal, and that those seats I had were shit. Being below pitch level really makes it hard to get perspective on the field & I found myself just watching the screen half the time so I could actually tell where everyone was relative to each other & the pitch. Speaking of the screen, that's pretty rubbish too - cuts off the game every couple of minutes to show an ad for one of the sponsors, which they could probably just do over the quarter of the screen that has the score on instead, but money.

[Spikey M]

1176613540263858177?s=19

:lol:

[Ian]

It was just a show of respect.

[Andy]

The 'fan all his life' bit might be over egging it considering he left for a Liverpool side that was finishing about 5 places above you at the time.

We never sold him to Liverpool, he was in our academy a long time ago, we released him as he wasnt tall enough. Then he went to Bournemouth.

I cant recall ever having a chance to sign him other than we did either.

Not sure who you're getting confused with as none of the players weve sold to Liverpool have been from Southampton.

[niko_cee]

I think he's probably thinking of Lallana, as he's the only one that remotely fits.

[Spikey M]

Probably as the rest were forrins. Although in general, unless they have a ridiculous accent I have no idea where any players are from or who they support.

[Andy]

Yeah, I only really know the odd player in the Southampton setup and the obvious high profile ones.

We have quite a few from Portsmouth at the moment.

[Waffdon]

That Chelsea team tonight :drool:

[niko_cee]

https://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/football/49828745

:face:

Someone have a word.

[John Arne]

Liverpool: GK-Kelleher, Hoever, Lovren, Gomez, Milner, Lallana, Oxlade, Keita, Jones, Elliot, Brewster

[John Arne]

Chelsea: Cabellero, James, Guehi, Zouma, Alonso, Gilmour, Barkley, Pulisic, Pedro(c), Hudson-Odoi, Batshuayi

[phonics]

Hudson-Odoi's back already? That seems very quick for an achilles. Hope he doesn't tear it again.

Who is Jones?

[Waffdon]

Chelsea: Cabellero, James, Guehi, Zouma, Alonso, Gilmour, Barkley, Pulisic, Pedro(c), Hudson-Odoi, Batshuayi

The Scottish Iniesta :drool:

What a team minus Alonso and Barkley.

[Giggles]

I'll even will Kelleher to have a good game seeing as it's not an important one.

[John Arne]

Hudson-Odoi's back already? That seems very quick for an achilles. Hope he doesn't tear it again.

Who is Jones?

Curtis Jones.

[Shindig]

https://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/football/49828745

:face:

Someone have a word.

Nah, let him talk. If it goes wrong, it'll not be down to him ... probably.

[John Arne]

Oxford Utd: Eastwood, Long, Dickie, Moore, Ruffels, Hall, Brannagan, Thorne, Baptiste, Forde, Mackie. Subs: Taylor, Woodburn, Fosu, Stevens, Sykes, Agyei, Jones.
West Ham: Roberto, Zabaleta, Balbuena, Diop, Masuaku, Sanchez, Snodgrass, Wilshere, Fornals, Holland, Ajeti. Subs: Fabianski, Cresswell, Felipe Anderson, Noble, Goncalo Cardoso, Haller, Coventry.

[Waffdon]

If Chelsea don’t score at least 7 here they’ve failed.

[Giggles]

Nice touch.

1176921106109911040

[niko_cee]

I know I shouldn't be surprised, but Lovren's really pulling out the stops to be the worst player on the pitch in this shitshow of league 1 muppets and kids/reserves.

Quite like the look of this haircut we've nicked off Fulham.

Hoever is obviously falling into some sort of dreadful national stereotype by deciding to play in clogs.

[-james-]

Brighton have properly sacked this off. Apart from Duffy and that Connolly (subbed off for another child already), I doubt any of the starters from tonight will start a Premier League game this season.

[randomlegend]

The one bright spot from this game so far is Axel Tuanzebe, who looks excellent.

[Lewis]

Nice touch.

1176921106109911040

Immigrant gets special treatment. Typical.

[Lewis]

Rojo waving his arms at the sideways passing. :cool:

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

I forgot about the Carabao. Any streams? I can't seem to find it on the awful Footybite.

[randomlegend]

I forgot about the Carabao. Any streams? I can't seem to find it on the awful Footybite.

ronaldo7.net has streams for it. Still as bizarre a site as ever.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Reece James looks good, albeit against Cleethorpes Hellscape United, but Dave could be under threat sharpish.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Thank you.

[John]

Filip Helander is the slowest player I've seen since Kevin Kyle. I'm confident the linesman has beaten him for pace two or three times tonight.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

That was a nice finish by Greenwood.

Oh and lol at West Ham.

[bruhnaldo]

Oh and lol at West Ham
Couldn't resist could you

[randomlegend]

Filip Helander is the slowest player I've seen since Kevin Kyle. I'm confident the linesman has beaten him for pace two or three times tonight.

Can't be slower than Blind.

Oh and fuck's sake :D

EDIT: 16 and English? We'll pay £30m for him in January.

[bruhnaldo]

If Chelsea don’t score at least 7 here they’ve failed.

welp!

[-james-]

1175783597594337280

[phonics]

Reece James looks good, albeit against Cleethorpes Hellscape United, but Dave could be under threat sharpish.

That's the most Welsh name of all time.

Callum Chambers looked like Cafu yesterday. Even pulled off a perfect cross on the volley, was proper video game stuff.

[Lewis]

United will definitely lose if it goes to penalties.

[bruhnaldo]

Gonna lose anyways because this is my life

[Lewis]

Paulp Oogba X
Rojo ✓
Lingard X
Greenwood X

[Waffdon]

Reece James looks good, albeit against Cleethorpes Hellscape United, but Dave could be under threat sharpish.

If he’s not starting for Chelsea and doesn’t make the Euros it’ll be from breaking his leg again. Far too good. Gilmour ran the game at times as well. Hudson-Odoi really should stick to the right wing until his shooting and composure improves as his crossing is already at a good level.

[Lewis]

Actually it might go to five because Romero is just the sort of flapping idiot to save one or two, so put Fred down for a successful kick.

[Waffdon]

That's the most Welsh name of all time.

Callum Chambers looked like Cafu yesterday. Even pulled off a perfect cross on the volley, was proper video game stuff.

Cafu’s children wish their Dad was Reece James.

[John]

Can't be slower than Blind.

Oh and fuck's sake :D

EDIT: 16 and English? We'll pay £30m for him in January.

Significantly slower.

[bruhnaldo]

Pogba getting tackled in the box ffs

[John Arne]

Cracking result for Man United holding Rochdale to a 1-1 draw.

[Lewis]

What happened on that second Rochdale penalty? Was that the first time he's ever kicked a ball?

[bruhnaldo]

Man United Business Club LLC with a huge victory over Rochdale.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

1176958262530465794

[Lewis]

The Plastic Treble is still on (I suspect the league is gone). :cool:

[Shindig]

You'll draw the mackems next round, probably.

[randomlegend]

So I can't work out how to link the video directly but

https://v.redd.it/64qcie5p3to31

Romero :lol:

[niko_cee]

I see the path is basically being cleared for City to win this again.

They'll get the winner of Crawley v Colchester in the next round whilst the winners of Chelsea/United and Liverpool/Arsenal will face off.

[phonics]

Good draw for us imo. Either we get a morale boosting win against a team better than us or we get knocked out before the fixtures pile up. Win/win.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Reckon we have the measure of United at 2nd XI level, so not a bad draw, unless they take it seriously.

[Pen]

As seen yesterday, a serious United side isn’t such a terrifying opponent. Have United won away after that PSG game?

Edit: nevermind. They haven’t.

[-james-]

Don't know if anyone cares about nerd shit, but I put together some schedule-adjusted xG based ratings on the Premier league so far.

https://i.imgur.com/ExQ9PIp.png

Anyone that has played City has a massively tanked defence rating, and what I've seen of Newcastle really does bear out in the numbers.

[Shindig]

All aboard the nowt club.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Are those numbers relative to 1st and last place? I'm tired and don't understand.

[Waffdon]

Im glad because I’m also confused and have no idea what it’s supposed to mean.

[Pepe]

I'm guessing 1 is the best and 0 the worst and how each compare in relation to the best, based on whatever xG is. In other words, complete wankery, just look at the goals for / goals against columns and you will have the same information (or even better, the points table.)

[-james-]

It's just normalized so 1 is the best and 0 is the worst, easier on the eyes than scaling between 8 and 16 or whatever.

You can look at goals for and against, but I don't think it's controversial to say that they can often lie. This is purely which teams have been best at creating and preventing chances. Normalized by schedule means I've taken their performance vs each opponent and compared it to how that team has done in each of the rest of their games.

There are a bunch of caveats (small sample being the primary), but I find this sort of thing interesting to look at.

[Pen]

What does that mean? For example are United over or underachieving?

[Giggles]

Green good, red bad.

[Pepe]

They are half a Man City, so I don't know.

[-james-]

What does that mean? For example are United over or underachieving?

Excellent defence, average attack. It speaks nothing of under/overperformance.

[Pepe]

FEC donning it. :cool:

[Reg]

That is interesting. I've thought we've 'played better' than our league position suggests, so good to know there's something that backs that up. I'd have guessed Norwich would be way higher and United a bit lower.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

https://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/football/49824424


Two votes for Mohamed Salah in the Best Fifa men's player award were not counted because signatures were in capital letters, says Fifa.

The Egyptian Football Association (EFA) said acting Egypt coach Shawky Gharib and captain Ahmed Elmohamady voted for Liverpool forward Salah.

Nicaragua captain Juan Barrera called into question the authenticity of his country's votes in the awards as he said he did not submit any votes.

Fifa's records show that Barrera voted for Lionel Messi as best player and Liverpool's Jurgen Klopp as best manager.

"I did not vote in the awards #TheBest2019 any information about my vote is false," 30-year-old midfielder Barrera tweeted.

The Sudanese Football Federation also said its published votes did not match the votes it cast.

FIFA cheating to ensure Messi won...

[Gray Fox]

I'll get on to the t-shirt printers.

[Shindig]

New alleged takeover talk involving Peter Kenyon. Whatever, lads. Whatever.

[Pen]

Green good, red bad.

Colourblind sad.

(I do kind of get it now)

[Giggles]

This cup semi tonight :drool:

[Giggles]

The season is telling on Bohs now, they’ve offered nothing at all.

[Andy]

That is interesting. I've thought we've 'played better' than our league position suggests, so good to know there's something that backs that up. I'd have guessed Norwich would be way higher and United a bit lower.

I've only watched Brighton in the game against Saints and the red card changed everything.

I feel like weve on the whole even quite lucky. I think weve had 5 big VAR calls go our way, which has had a huge swing on our position.

[Gray Fox]

If Mané had his shooting boots on we'd have this wrapped up already.

Sheffield United putting a lot of work in off the ball so hopefully we can pick them off late on. They seem to be playing a 5-3-2 but pressing high and then when they get the ball, all bar one CB sprints up the pitch to join in. It's quite a thing.

[Waffdon]

Jesus

[Waffdon]

Barkley, Alonso, Azpilicueta, Pedro and Willian in the same team. Meltdown central.