Reality TV and other shite

[Magic]

Anyone watching Life on Marbs? :drool:

[Magic]

Fucking hell john it was a joke.

[Baz]

It's the Bake Off final tomorrow. :drool:

Cmon Tamal.

Although a Nadiya win would also be acceptable.

[John]

Fucking hell john it was a joke.

It needed a thread, and that post was as good as any to kick it off.

That's a quality name though, and shows a level of wit and awareness of quality programming that you wouldn't expect from the sort of thundercunt involved with such tosh.

[Lewis]

I'd like to see somebody with no personality whatsoever win the Bake Off. Maybe I could do it. Learn to bake, and then don it every week with robotic perfection whilst refusing to BANTER with 'Hollywood' Paul Hollywood and them lesbians.

'It's a chocolate cake, Paul. It's chocolate-flavoured cake. Now if you don't mind, I have to make my chocolate cake.'

[Magic]

Big Brother should re-name to House of Tards.

No?

:(

[Boydy]

Lewis watches bake off?

[Magic]

'Mel' isn't a lesbian. She'd be a brilliant sex partner. It'd be like getting a blowie from Dr. Zoidberg.

[Lewis]

My mother does, so I absorb it if I'm in the living room. Hollywood needs putting firmly in his place.

[Boydy]

Uh huh, I believe you.

[Benny]

Harold :D

Is that actually her though? They all look the same when they've got that much make up on.

[QE Harold Flair]

Yes, it's her. She became a webcam girl and escort after X-Factor.

I see it's been deleted, which is odd. Is nudity allowed or not? And if not, why not? Not like there's anything to protect.

[Magic]

Who??

[QE Harold Flair]

http://i3.mirror.co.uk/incoming/article5371681.ece/ALTERNATES/s615/Chloe-Mafia-on-XFactor-2010.jpg

[Magic]

About ChloeIts not about what you heard . Its what your hearing.

:D

[John]

Yes, it's her. She became a webcam girl and escort after X-Factor.

I see it's been deleted, which is odd. Is nudity allowed or not? And if not, why not? Not like there's anything to protect.

Read the rules.

[QE Harold Flair]

No thanks, John.

She's actually a millionairess now.

http://www.chloemafiaofficial.com/

[John]

Do as you please, but next time you break them you'll get the ban you should have got for that.

[Benny]

Most definitely an escort, loads of them carted out to Dubai now.

[Benny]

Fucking lol, looked at her Instagram and she has this post:

http://i.imgur.com/rmg8G8R.png

The quickest of reverse imaging reveals it's the foyer for a new build block of flats in Huddersfield, I feel like she was trying to suggest it was an image of her house the cheeky tart.

http://www.rightmove.co.uk/property-for-sale/property-34628324.html

[QE Harold Flair]

Do as you please, but next time you break them you'll get the ban you should have got for that.

It won't make your penis any bigger. If you want to discuss this further then pm me. Otherwise, keep on topic.

[Baz]

My mother does, so I absorb it if I'm in the living room. Hollywood needs putting firmly in his place.he is a prick, but Mary Berry's worse. I hate her. Actually, all the presenters are annoying.

Nadiya and Tamal are good though, and Flora was alright in a oh god what's gone wrong now? poor girl! kinda way.
That posh bloke with the bulb head and homegrown basil and rubbish homemade wooden cutting blocks can get lost though. Ian is it? Typical.

As for the LOLOL u watch bake off m8? I've only watched the last 3 episodes and thought it as alright. Something not too bad that we both agree on - a rarity!

[Giggles]

I was gutted I missed the last bakeoff and then recorded some shitty last series rerun special on Sunday instead of the repeat. Chocolate week and all.

[Pleb]

Apprentice next week :drool:

[Lewis]

There is a documentary about seven year old trannies on Channel 4. These people are just idiots.

[QE Harold Flair]

Did anyone see 'We Want Our Country Back' on BBC Three. Now we all know the BBC is a biased organisation but they usually try and pretend otherwise. Not in this.

[Lewis]

I saw 'Is Britain Racist?' last night. They kept running 'experiments' that either proved nothing or proved we aren't, and then they explained them away with 'Although this proves nothing, the black lad got looked at in a shop, so...'

[QE Harold Flair]

I missed that one, I don't think I'll bother with the BBC on this kind of issue any more. Some of Britain First are obviously twats, but there was some absolutely ridiculous bias in this, not to mention outright lies. Such as 'as usual with right wing demonstrations, it soon descended into violence' - camera pans out to show no violence beyond a few nasty words. In fact, the only violence shown was by Muslims attacking them but, as was pointed out, it's okay because they were provoked. Obviously.

[Lewis]

The other highlight was some pleb from 'Liberty GB' trying to explain to the brown presenter that she wasn't ethnically British. He wasn't doing a particularly good job of explaining himself (because 'British' is a political state), but she got all offended because she didn't understand what ethnicity means and took it to mean she was a second class citizen.

[Lewis]

The Muslim woman gets to stay at home all day baking whilst the two blokes have to work. It's not fair.

[Lewis]

I tried to use an icing bag once, but I had made the icing too thick for the nozzle and it just burst all over my hands. Icing. :drool:

[Magic]

Jake Yapp on GBBO is worth watching.

[Giggles]

Those things look like the most uninspiring dessert ever to be handed.

[Magic]

Berry going to sabotage this. Can't have colonials winning.

[Lewis]

I wasn't bothered who won until I saw that grown man (and father of two) crying over a baking competition, at which point I wanted him to lose. I imagine his kids will grow up gay/trans anyway if they're watching their old man doing all the housework, but he's just surrendered any authority he might require in future.

[Magic]

Not to worry lads she'll be off to Syria next week with the kids.

[Giggles]

I wasn't bothered who won until I saw that grown man (and father of two) crying over a baking competition, at which point I wanted him to lose. I imagine his kids will grow up gay/trans anyway if they're watching their old man doing all the housework, but he's just surrendered any authority he might require in future.

He has the head of an old woman with a man's haircut.

[Magic]

Is it just me or does 'Grimmy' look like he can dislocate his entire jaw on demand? He doesn't look or sound like a real human being.

[Toby]

I almost feel like we need a third TV thread now for non-serial stuff that doesn't fall under the auspices of braindead shite.

Did anybody see this week's Only Connect? It looks like they've seriously ramped up the difficulty for the knockout rounds of this series, even some of the vowel stuff was too obscure for me.

[Magic]

Watching the X Factor and my gran has just said about the weird, confused American freak:

'He's definitely got the trans vote'

Well...

[Jeet]

Oh look Arouna Kone is on FirstDates.

[Jeet]

Because telling your date you cross dress and go gay bars is gonna help you pull :face:

[wullie]

And of course, it worked for him. You're on fire this week.

[Jeet]

And of course, it worked for him. You're on fire this week.

She wants a gay friend to go out with.


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KGzeC9IaGLc

[wullie]

Did you know they're making a sixth season of the IT Crowd where Roy didn't actually die in the meth lab?

[Lewis]

Lee out of Eastenders was fine fixing that plug until 'er indoors started nattering him, yet he's getting all the grief. Seething.

[Lewis]

This 'Gavin' looks like Geoffrey Hayes as well, which slightly undermines his villain credentials.

[Lewis]

Ian Beale's mam looks good to say she must be pushing pension age.

[Lewis]

What am I even doing with my life?

[Luca]

I'd like to see somebody with no personality whatsoever win the Bake Off. Maybe I could do it. Learn to bake, and then don it every week with robotic perfection whilst refusing to BANTER with 'Hollywood' Paul Hollywood and them lesbians.

'It's a chocolate cake, Paul. It's chocolate-flavoured cake. Now if you don't mind, I have to make my chocolate cake.'

The unfortunate thing is that you'd be screened out early doors unless you could fake the BANTER and PERSONALITY in the auditions. My aunt was on some minor Italian reality, and was in the last few rounds of selection for The Apprentice there as well, and she's corroborated that it's pretty much 100% personality driven.

[Lewis]

Is that why Samsung dropped their interest?

[Lewis]

Go on, Ben, you poofter. You've killed before, you can do it again.

[Lewis]

It's not Sharon's real dad is it? Groan.

[Luca]

Is that why Samsung dropped their interest?

I actually dropped them because I didn't have the time. Could have warned Floyd that they were a bunch of bent bastards.

[phonics]

Great British Menu is the best show of all time when you can skip everything that isn't food and x-factor-esque pauses.

[phonics]

I had a 'friend' get to the second round of French Pop Idol and I was sure he'd get taken as he had a prime combo of being really shit and mentally unhinged. Sadly he just never got a call back.

[Giggles]

I'm forced into sitting through the dancing thing on BBC tonight. It's absolutely hideous, never seen as much filler in a show in my life. And why do the old judge and the little foreign judge shout so much?

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

I'm forced into sitting through the dancing thing on BBC tonight. It's absolutely hideous, never seen as much filler in a show in my life. And why do the old judge and the little foreign judge shout so much?

Entertainment...

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

I decided to turn the X Factor on for the first time this year.

The first person was meh, the second was shit and the group who have just gone on were a car crash.

[wullie]

I like the voice of the chubby fella with glasses, but the Asian girls were about a million times better than everyone else including the guest doing his own single.

[wullie]

The old man holding everyone hostage with a lighter was awful. Kathy was close enough to blow out the flame which would give Ben a chance to terribly act him to the floor. Sharon could then sit on him until the police arrive.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Also, what the fuck?


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DTjYTTwk_FQ

[GS]

I gave up on X Factor several years ago. It was grim then, so fuck knows how bad it must be these days.

[John]

The old man holding everyone hostage with a lighter was awful. Kathy was close enough to blow out the flame which would give Ben a chance to terribly act him to the floor. Sharon could then sit on him until the police arrive.

I saw that. The attempt to turn it into a horror film was laughable. They had the false scares, fireworks filling in for lightning in the old 'ominous figure glimpsed in the shadows' routine, the wise kid being shut down by an impatient adult, the antagonist with a ghostly ability to only be seen by children until he reveals himself. When the camera went in close on a slowly turning doorknob I lolled,

[phonics]

Great documentary on BBC2 about the Carribean at the moment.

[Lewis]

I like the voice of the chubby fella with glasses, but the Asian girls were about a million times better than everyone else including the guest doing his own single.

Of what I've seen them Asians are by far the best (and probably stand to make the most money), but I couldn't get my head around the chair business.

[Baz]

One of them's from St Helens. Kiera Weathers.

[Boydy]

Great documentary on BBC2 about the Carribean at the moment.

Simon Reeve? I caught the first episode of that. It was good. His shows always are.

[Giggles]

Jesus, there's a Great Irish Bakeoff too, exactly the same right down to the notebook drawings of the cakes and the happy/creepy background music. I had forgot Anna Nolan existed until I seen it there. Do you have to be a lesbian to present this franchise?

[Baz]

I recently got into The Almost Impossible Gameshow. It's absolute rubbish, on par with Total Wipeout, but the Rubberbandits narrate it so it ends up being class.

Also Karl Pilkington's The Moaning Of Life 2 is about 80% boring, watching him do stupid stuff, but when he's away from it and just chatting about what he's thinking about he's really funny. When he mentioned his pillow looking like giraffe skin really amused me.

[Toby]

Only Connect has turned a bit shit recently. Maybe I'm just bitter at not getting answers, but everything seems incredibly obscure to a level far beyond what it used to be.

[Jimmy Floyd]

I absolutely smashed it the other day. Probably just on a run of questions you can't do. I'm on such a run with University Challenge.

I still hate the no vowels round though, might as well finish with a wank off.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

:D @ the guy having his card declined.

[Toby]

I got a message today to ask how I'd managed to appear in that Class of '92 thing...

http://i.dailymail.co.uk/i/pix/2015/11/06/21/2E2F990500000578-0-image-a-74_1446845851844.jpg

[Kikó]

:D .. Is that not you?

[Giggles]

The ad for the latest Masterchef: The Professionals suggests it's still ruined by having no Roux Jr and that Wareing cock inatead again. Used to be my favourite :(

[Toby]

I absolutely smashed it the other day. Probably just on a run of questions you can't do. I'm on such a run with University Challenge.

I still hate the no vowels round though, might as well finish with a wank off.

Here's a Children in Need edition with a "This one goes up to eleven" question to save me.

[igor_balis]

Here's a Children in Need edition with a "This one goes up to eleven" question to save me.

The whole show was really easy, but at least it wasn't as bad as Celebrity Mastermind.

[Jeet]

Those lezzies on firstdates :drool: No doubt scissoring the crap out of each other after.

[Jimmy Floyd]

I'm absolutely all over Masterchef: The Professionals. There's some fatty fat baldy bastard in it who is an actual genius.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

I'm absolutely all over Masterchef: The Professionals. There's some fatty fat baldy bastard in it who is an actual genius.

That guy who made a pie that wasn't meant to be a pie that clearly wasn't a pie is a disgrace.

[Jimmy Floyd]

'I've deconstructed this pie.'

Mate, that's just dry chicken and what looks like some biscuits.

[wullie]

Those lezzies on firstdates :drool: No doubt scissoring the crap out of each other after.

That woman there to date the cheery bald Geordie was horrendous, talking about going for a piss and fart smells.

[Giggles]

Absolutely nowhere else I could think of putting this, but Nadine Coyle is on a talk show here at the moment and time has not been kind to her.

[Magic]

I'm absolutely all over Masterchef: The Professionals. There's some fatty fat baldy bastard in it who is an actual genius.

The Mod development chef from Moray. :cool:

[Giggles]

Haven't seen Eastenders in months and it happens to be on here. Sharon is trying to stop Phil drinking. How many times have they flogged that one now?

He also can't seem to break down a very light and rattly sounding bedroom door. Not great for a lad that knocked the fuck out of people for years.

EDIT: Is that fucking Richard Blackwood? :D

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

I'm hoping he gets back onto the harder stuff.

Smackhead Phil was glorious.

[Lewis]

lol at binning them quality Asians for that fucking minstrel show. Every time I've seen them they've donned everyone shitless.

[Giggles]

Wish I hadn't started following this bakeoff thing now. I want to go to bed.

[Lewis]

This (http://sofabet.com/2015/12/07/louisas-journey-from-prodcuers-favoured-winner-to-producers-favoured-winner/) is interesting.


By the time Louisa made it to our screens, someone had bought her the handle @louisa on both Instagram and Twitter (where she’d previously been the less-memorable @louisajohnson0). That won’t have come cheap, and it was clearly an investment in anticipation of Louisa’s presence on the show setting her up for lucrative post-show stardom.

I saw it the other day, but I've just seen her calling herself 'just a normal person' after her (very good) performance. Get lost, love. I hope the minstrel show wins.

[niko_cee]

Minstrels.

:D/:nono:

That song really is dreadful.

'Mon Reggie 'N' Bollie.

[Baz]

Adele would probably get it, these days. :flirt:

[leedsrevolution]

I like the song. I'm biased because I'm a huge Dylan fan mind.

[Giggles]

This shit is making the bake-off final an hour late :mad:

[niko_cee]

They'd have been better off doing the Alphaville 'version'.

Presumably it's some ruse to get the Dylan version to No.1 Cohen style (which Cowell probably also owns).

[Henry]

Rita Orra's boobies. :drool:

[Boydy]

This (http://sofabet.com/2015/12/07/louisas-journey-from-prodcuers-favoured-winner-to-producers-favoured-winner/) is interesting.



I saw it the other day, but I've just seen her calling herself 'just a normal person' after her (very good) performance. Get lost, love. I hope the minstrel show wins.

My parents were all happy Louisa won (tinged with a bit of racism and my dad's throbbing erection for Louisa) so I told them the details of that article to piss on their parade. It does my head in that they watch it religiously, take it all seriously and don't think it's manipulated to the extreme.

[igor_balis]

My mental ex-girlfriend would ask me if I knew wrestling was fake ('yes, obviously'), and constantly moan about me watching it, yet lost her fucking shit when I ONCE asked her if she knew how fake X-Factor was.

[wullie]

After they did the ill-suited winners song, you could see that Bollie knew they'd been fucked over. In the interests of fairness they should have had Louisa do On A Ragga Tip surrounded by dancing Christmas trees.

Rita Ora seems like a right shit.

[Toby]

They'd have been better off doing the Alphaville 'version'.

Presumably it's some ruse to get the Dylan version to No.1 Cohen style (which Cowell probably also owns).

It was Burke and Jeff Buckley who managed the 1-2 double. Cohen charted but only in the mid-30s.

[Spammer]

Look at me! Top of the page!

[niko_cee]

Yeah, I remembered Jeff after the fact. Grace, Columbia records, owned by Sony.

:sherlock:

Never realised he did an album called Live from the Bataclan.

[Toby]

This Love You To Death documentary on BBC Two is grim viewing.

[Lewis]

The 'rugby league community' nearly doing it (fuck off Andy Murray you Jock tosser). :cool:

[Waffdon]

It wasn't really that close.

[Lewis]

He's the first league player to be nominated, and he got miles more than third place. He's donned it.

[Waffdon]

Glorious failure

[Boydy]

Just discovered The Chase USA on Challenge. I love the British one but this has far too much whoopin' and hollerin' from the crowd.

[Pleb]

David Gest and Gemma Collins in the Big Brother house?

Fucking hell.

[igor_balis]

Watching 4 in a bed cus why the fuck not. Fucking lol at hobbyist caterers and B&B owners, they're so prissy and take everything so personally. The couple I'm watching right now got so personally affronted cus the slightly more middle class couple brought their own rye bread, and only wanted poached eggs and beans off the menu. And the bloke went to the kitchen to politely ask for salt and pepper.

'It is bloody rude to bring your own food to breakfast', er, no it isn't. It is a business not a fucking dinner party. Also, turning the fact they didn't like sausages and bacon into a personal attack on them or something? Fuck sake.

[Boydy]

I hate that programme.

[igor_balis]

I hate myself.

[wullie]

The worst thing about that programme is that when you go somewhere new you'll have to fight the urge not to search every room for pubes.

[Boydy]

I request extra pubes when I book. No searching for me.

[wullie]

I bring my own, I hate having to settle extras on the bill.

[Toby]

Derren Brown.


I'd still arrest the cunts who actually kicked him and pushed him. Watched the whole thing with the first guy thinking, "well obviously he's not going to do that, you mentalist", but here we have three arseholes who believed they were pushing a man to his death and did it anyway.

[Giggles]

What happened?

[Toby]

An experiment where they had people helping out at a charity event, doing small menial tasks like some sort of Pavlov's dog reward thing. Then a rich donor has a heart attack and the guy who's been posing as their manager / the leader of the charity suggests they hide it until after the dinner so they can still get donations from a charity auction, eventually culminating in them inexplicably leaving him in a stairwell and kicking him in the ribs to "give him bruises so it looks like he fell". Then there's some twist reveal where he has a made up illness that causes him to have blackouts, so they go back and discover he wasn't dead, and has run up to a roof shouting about what they did, and some other charity staff convince the subject to push him off the roof to protect the charity.

At no point did hiding him make sense, but when it got to the point of trying to make it look like he fell down the stairs it's just complete nonsense. The stupid bastards need shooting.

[Boydy]

People fell for that?

[Raoul Duke]

So hang on - you're saying people in pressure situations make bad judgement calls?

[Toby]

People fell for that?

Three of the four did yes.


So hang on - you're saying people in pressure situations make bad judgement calls?

You wouldn't excuse actual murder on those grounds. If you push somebody off a roof in the full belief you are doing so to kill them, you should be prosecuted.

[Giggles]

So hang on - you're saying people in pressure situations make bad judgement calls?

A bad judgement call is maybe half arseing something. If that's just a bad judgement call then close the doors on the whole place already.

[Magic]

You're such a dry cunt, Tobe. :D

[Toby]

I'm not actually convinced the three they showed doing it weren't actors, to be fair. They just threw in snippets of them at the end after the one they'd been following refused to comply with their nonsense.

[Shindig]

I'm sorry but I've found that sudden deaths of wealthy people can be exploited simply by announcing their death. Especially at events where wealthy donors are congregated.

[Giggles]

Gemma fucking Arterton :drool:

[Boydy]

Anyone watch that Jihadis Next Door programme tonight on Channel 4? Is it worth watching?

[Lewis]

Stacey going off her head is literally the worst Eastenders story ever. Just kill/section her and let's move on.

[Lewis]

Wahey, they're sectioning her. Thank God(!) for that.

[Shindig]

Hang on. Isn't her mam also a mentalist?

[wullie]

The ferrety ginger guy who keeps turning up saying he needs to tell her something had about a million chances to tell her but instead stood there looking weird while she called him King Herod. Vintage Eastenders.

[John]

The bit on Monday where her complete lunacy happened to coincide with Kat feeling a bit shit that ended with Martin giving an 'it'll all be fine after all' smile made me want to punch the TV off the wall.

Hopefully it turns out she isn't mental and a vengeful God turns up in a fortnight with a plague or two for that twat.

[Boydy]

Why the fuck are you all watching Eastenders?

[wullie]

They should swap the actors round for Martin and Ben. Martin's a wet blanket played by a fairly big chap, and then you've got Ben Mitchell who was described as the Toploader gay as having a mean and tough reputation without his grandparents instantly laughing themselves into a coma.

[wullie]

Why the fuck are you all watching Eastenders?

Coronation Street too for me now.

[John]

I watch it and all the other soaps on a Monday with my gran. It's quite a good way to watch them, actually, since about twenty minutes is taken up working out what's happened in the week since I last seen them, leaving ten minutes of tedium before the next one starts and the puzzle starts anew.

[Giggles]

I used to watch Eastenders but stopped before the Dyer years. Last I seen of Stacy she was getting off with doing someone as Bradley took the rap before he died. Is that why she's going mad now?

[John]

She's bi-polar.

[Giggles]

Can someone explain this Come Dine Champions thing. Who are the contestants and who's food are they cooking? Is it episode losers cooking the food of that weeks winner or what way are they doing it?

[Boydy]

That French maitre d on First Dates is great.

[Toby]

Get a hobby mate.

[Boydy]

:D

I do really need one. I was only watching that because I was sitting in the living room with my folks as it was freezing so I wanted the heat from the fire.

[Giggles]

It's better than that horrid Undateables thing at least. Also, tattoo fixers has to be the assembly of the biggest shower of cunts ever put on TV.

[Boydy]

Yeah it's actually quite nice sometimes. That lad with asperger's last night was a heartwarming story.

[Giggles]

Yeah it's actually quite nice sometimes. That lad with asperger's last night was a heartwarming story.

It just sounds like an episode of the undateables then.

When they have tidy lezzers on though :drool:

[Boydy]

It was nice. They liked each other and he was well made up.

[Toby]

I've been watching Shetland on BBC1, initially just because it's fun to spot the locations and any extras I know, but it's actually surprisingly good this series. The first two were the classic tepid water of BBC drama, but they've made darker and I think it's better for it.

[Foe]

I watched it last night and actually enjoyed it.

I've never been to unst or fetlar but it almost made Shetland look like a place I would want to visit. Then I remember the torture I went through when I lived there and come to my senses.

The fish was good though.

[Toby]

Do you mean that just as an aside? They haven't filmed in Unst or Fetlar to my knowledge.

[Foe]

The episode I watched they were touring the small islands up north.

Which, after digging, is because I was watching "grand tours of the Scottish islands" and not Shetland.

:moop:

[Giggles]

Won't be of interest to many but looking forward to the new one of these. The last one with David Bentley in it was decent.

No idea who the American Football player is but most people would know of Steve Harmison.



https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iFbBHTcHy2c

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

I can't understand the new Scottish family on Gogglebox, especially the woman.

[Giggles]

I can't understand the new Scottish family on Gogglebox, especially the woman.

I ended up seeing that tonight. The Lawrie/Hiddleston thing looks like something I would have watched and now it's ruined.

[Giggles]

Also, Church would still get one after seeing her on The Last Leg.

[Lewis]

Hour long Neighbours special for somebody getting deaded. THE MOST EXPLOSI... Stop right there. Some of us remember the plane crash. :drool:

[Yevrah]

That must be the lowest budget for an explosion on tv ever.

[John]

I saw the beginning of that as I was leaving my gran's. Since when is Toadfish a fucking lawyer?

[Lewis]

Since about 2001.

[John]

I remember him being a pleb with a mullet. It must have been far longer than I thought since I last saw it.

[Lewis]

Proper emergency services could have cut him out of that. Having one doctor has worked for twenty years, but it's fucked them here.

[Raoul Duke]

Apart from Toadfish, are any of the old crew still knocking around in it? Helen Daniels is probably still mooching about looking stern, I bet.

[Giggles]

Why are some Simpsons randomly square and some not? The stupid black sides on the screen are annoying as fuck.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

The older ones were shot in 4:3.

[Giggles]

The older ones were shot in 4:3.

I've seen ones from series 21 shown like this though, and some not. The one on Sky One at the moment is from 19 and is square.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

I've seen ones from series 21 shown like this though, and some not. The one on Sky One at the moment is from 19 and is square.

Checking Wiki, it says that The Simpsons only went to 4:3 in 2009.

The last episode in 4:3 was in series 20.

[Boydy]

It also depends what TV you watch them on. Some will automatically adjust the older ones to fit the widescreen.

[igor_balis]

I think whether it is square or not is the last of a post-season 10 Simpsons episode's worries.

[Baz]

They're square if you watch them on Channel 4 HD.

Who died in Neighbours by the way?

[Giggles]

They're square if you watch them on Channel 4 HD.

Who died in Neighbours by the way?

Bouncer.

[Lewis]

Some pointless lad called Josh, who is (was) played by Steph Scully's actual in real life son. Finding that out might be the oldest thing that has ever happened to me.

[Baz]

Josh. He's the surprisingly buff nerdy one with a plastic face isn't he? RIP.

[Lewis]

That pretty much describes them all (even Ringo, who was buff with an eating disorder), but yes. I stopped watching it for years, but I've got back into it now, and, whilst it's never going to hit the heights of 2004-2008 (looking back, I reckon Paul Robinson's shit Scottish kid ruined it), it's actually decent.

[Baz]

I watch it once or twice a week, depending on how often I visit my parents and think it's alright.

Steph is fitter than she ever was, but I'm not sure if that's cos she's not next to Holly Valance in every other scene, or whether it's because I'm an adult and fancy women now, or if she's actually improved.

Some parts are utter poo but it still has its charm.

[Giggles]

She must have had work done because she used to have a fierce ropey mannish head on her.

[Magic]

Anyone watching Masterchef?

[Giggles]

Anyone watching Masterchef?

Haven't caught too much but have it on series record.

[John]

On Australian rubbish, I see two episodes of Home and Away a week and they seem to have abandoned any pretense of it actually being a soap. It's basically a frothy crime drama.

It's still full of irresponsibly beautiful people, they just shoot eachother and set houses on fire now instead of cheating on eachother and going surfing.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Juanita looks like she's going to go on and win Masterchef.

That pork dish looked brilliant.

[Davgooner]

Anyone watch the first episode of 'The Jail: 60 Days In' in CI last night? Looks like it'll be good value going forward; one of the bods, a fucking thick cunt of a teacher, is on the verge of being done in already after spectacularly fucking up his entrance.

[Lewis]

This twelve year old singing on Britain's Got Talent is good. Too good, in fact. To the point where it's a bit unnerving.

[Lewis]

Peggy Mitchell is doing herself in, and things have gone a bit It's a Wonderful Life.

[John]

My gran went mental over Ben and the tart fucking off that stupid dinner last night. She wants 'that poof with the curly hair' done in for encouraging Ben to stay in the pub.

It's a bit much to bring Peggy and Grant back just so she can top herself. Is that really what they're doing?

[Lewis]

Pretty much. Eastenders is boring.

[Boydy]

At least it (probably) keeps your mum quiet for half an hour though.

[Giggles]

My viewing stopped at Danny Dyer.

[Lewis]

When Phil Mitchell and Richard Blackwood (the properly black one) were feuding as part of the big Christmas story, she came up with a theory that it would turn out that they were half-brothers, and I literally spent the next three months explaining why 'how things actually work' made that was impossible.

[Yevrah]

It's a bit much to bring Peggy and Grant back just so she can top herself. Is that really what they're doing?

They did it seems. Absolutely bizarre route to take.

[wullie]

Last week Sonia Fowler had the line 'I love my boobs', Eastenders talk really should be in the Golden Age thread.

[Boydy]

Watching that latest Louis Theroux documentary about people recovering from brain damage. That poor bastard with the brain damaged wife. You'd just be wishing she'd died in that situation.

[Lewis]

There is a programme about fraternities on BBC2 now. Mert, mate. You're all bent.

[Davgooner]

Just about to post the same thing. Looks tragic thus far.

[Shindig]

"Nearly half US presidents hail from a fraternity..."

I.e. less than half.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

This pitch on Dragons Den is so stupid, especially as you can buy half sized pencils easily and they're in schools EVERYWHERE.

Oh or just steal them from IKEA or even just sharpen normal pencils down.

[igor_balis]

Been watching CBB for the first time in years. That Saira woman is AWFUL.

[Boydy]

I noticed that was on last night.

Why can't they make reality TV shows that are decent? Like some sort of psychological experiment or something. Make a reality show of the Stanford prison experiment.

[John]

Big Brother started off seeming like a genuinely interesting psychological experiment. Throw some people together, isolate them from the world, and film the results. I think it had been on a couple of years before they started all the stupid stuff.

[Boydy]

Yeah, I was kind of thinking back to it as well. The first seasons of it were okay. They just had normal people in it. Now it's only knobheads who are trying to become Z-list celebrities or in the case of the 'celebrity' version, actual Z-list celebrities.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Z-list is being kind to most of them in there.

[Shindig]

That was the coolest thing about reality TV's faltering first steps. You had Big Brother, Castaway and that stupid Channel 4 one called Shattered where a house full of people had to stay awake for a fortnight RISKING ACTUAL DEATH!

[bruhnaldo]

I can't believe Big Brother is still a thing both here in the States and over there as well.

edit:

The first couple seasons of most reality "game" shows weren't bad.

Then you get all the "I'm basing my strategy off of..." shite and then the producers trying to force certain angles for the failing ratings.

[igor_balis]

CBB this season has been fucking excellent, fuck the haters.

[Lewis]

There are more ethnics on this Bake Off than there are outside of the South East.

[Boydy]

Has anyone ever tried to use 'My5' (Channel 5's on demand service)?

The video won't seem to load for me on it at all. I even turned off AdBlock in case that was the problem.

[Boydy]

It works in Microsoft Edge for some reason.

[GS]

Celebrity Big Brother on catch up?

[Boydy]

Home and Away.

[Giggles]

It's Friday evening and at 9pm on BBC1 it's Goodnight Sweetheart. Goodnight fucking Sweetheart.

What the fuck do any of you pay a licence fee for?

[Disco]

I don't.

[wullie]

My fee goes to Adam Woodyatt's catering.

[Giggles]

On ITV right now, new lows in television are being reached.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Fuck off mate, Stephen Mulhern is a don.

[Giggles]

Fuck off mate, Stephen Mulhern is a don.

He's on an absolutely steaming pile of shite at the moment anyway.

[Boydy]

I saw him hosting some gameshow earlier today on ITV called 'Pick Me!'. It seemed like the only people in it (both contestants and audience, although the former came from the latter anyway) were special needs.

It seemed to have some sort of call my bluff format and the one who had to pick who was telling the truth from the other three seemed to feel like she had been seriously betrayed when it turned out the person she chose was lying. That's the entire point of the game. She said 'It just goes to show who you can trust these days.' I thought she was going to cry.

Sure enough, when the camera picked her out later when she was in the audience because they were re-calling some of the contestants who hadn't won, she actually was in tears.

[Giggles]

There was someone on this earlier naming pokemon that was definitely a spo. Must be a thing.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

I've just switched it on, fucking hell.

A man on a pogo stick going up 3 steps, grabbing a drink and then going back down the stairs to pour the drink into a large container.

For one fucking thousand pounds.

[Giggles]

A definite autistic here too.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

A definite autistic here too.
Yep and that was even before his skill was revealed.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

What a shit performance.

[Giggles]

Obviously not autistic enough.

[Giggles]

Just caught around half an hour of this Cold Feet thing that everyone is wanking themselves into oblivion over. Do you have to have seen the old ones to 'get it', because it's an awful pile of shite. Is it meant to be a comedy?

[Magic]

I just can't stand that cunt Nesbitt. It doesn't matter how good it is.

[wullie]

I know he's had the hair done, but his eyebrows are stealing every scene he's in.

[niko_cee]

This 'Honey G' character on the X Factor is some sort of wind up isn't she? Is it Catherine Tate? Don't get me wrong, she's probably the best thing to ever come out of the show, but she can't be real. It's her interviews that crack me up the most.

[Shindig]

I know he's had the hair done, but his eyebrows are stealing every scene he's in.

"That's ... one pound a game."

[wullie]

They're doubling up on the 'what will they do next OMG' acts on X-Factor with her and the supergays. The boy with the eyes you could dive into is clearly set up to win it all.

[Lewis]

Yevrah, mate, this gay murder trial in Eastenders has a black male judge with two black women as his assistants (or whatever those people are called). Both of the barristers were white, but the lad said he was guilty, so they're irrelevant.

[Lewis]

Now they're all stood in the pub wearing 'END HATE CRIME' t-shirts listening to Ben Mitchell musing on a more tolerant world. Remember when you killed Fat Heather, you four-eyed sanctimonious cunt?

[Giggles]

Speaking of 'ev, is that haggard Shirley wench still vodkaing the shit out of it?

[Shindig]

I love the about-turns some characters get. Beale's mental son went from shooting his wife in the womb to being the most toothless gimp in the space of a month.

[niko_cee]

Sharon Osborne is either off her face or having some sort of psychotic episode on X Factor.

[Lewis]

This 'Honey G' character on the X Factor is some sort of wind up isn't she? Is it Catherine Tate? Don't get me wrong, she's probably the best thing to ever come out of the show, but she can't be real. It's her interviews that crack me up the most.

I only found out what this is today. It either has to be that, or she must have had a whopping mental breakdown at some point that stripped her of all self-awareness.

[wullie]

I'm surprised that not only did the public vote out the world-class gays but also the judges didn't save them based on them being fun and wearing costumes. The foreign girl's out next.

[niko_cee]

They were done for once they were up against a Sharon contestant - the only hope they had was for her and Louis to collude and send it to the public vote. Plus they were just awful. If you're going to be flaming, you have to be fun with it. They just came across as mincers with a sense of entitlement.

What is it about people from Finland? Does their personality simply not translate into English or are they all emotionless drones? Who's met Pen?

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Ginger lad on Great British Menu this week is smashing the shit out of it. Doing so many elements and, seemingly, absolutely nailing them.

I'd happily dive head first into both of his dishes thus far.

[Adamski]

I thought the guy last week was good but he's taken it up another level.

Will need to fuck it up now to not hit the best score ever.

[igor_balis]

CBB back tonight. Jamie O'Hara is on there, and seems boring as fuck already. James Cosmo my early fave. Hoping the unbearable cunts provide as much fun as the last season, which was top notch.

[Boydy]

I saw a little bit of it earlier as my parents were watching it. Brandon Block seems like such a sad old man.

[Giggles]

New series of the Crystal Maze confirmed :cool:

[Jimmy Floyd]

I can't even comprehend that taking place outside 1993.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

With Richard Ayoade though.

Burn it with fire.

[Disco]

I can't even comprehend that taking place outside 1993.

Or without Richard O'Brien.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Not sure there are any showmen of his calibre out there anymore, they all have to be ironic twats now. Like Richard Ayoade.

[niko_cee]

Judge Rinder could give it a go.

[John]

Surprised it isn't Alexander Armstrong. He'd be perfect for it and he's on everything else.

[Giggles]

With Richard Ayoade though.

Burn it with fire.

What? Ah for fucks sake.

[wullie]

I thought Stephen Merchant was pretty good on the Christmas special they did, although he was really just doing a Richard O'Brien impression.

[Boydy]

Richard Ayoade is great.

[Adamski]

Yeah, I really like him too.

IT Crowd was fantastic.

[Lewis]

Richard Ayoade (like David Mitchell) is only funny to people whose entire comedic intake is Twitter-based snark.

[Boydy]

I don't think David Mitchell is all that funny. He's just a bit annoying now.

Ayoade isn't really that snarky though.