Reality TV and other shite

[Giggles]

I thought Stephen Merchant was pretty good on the Christmas special they did, although he was really just doing a Richard O'Brien impression.

That's why I was pleased as I thought he'd be doing it. Ayoade is just a smartarse twat.

[bruhnaldo]

I've only seen Ayoade in IT Crowd but IT Crowd is one of my favorite shows ever so I'm biased.

[Offshore Toon]

http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_ldqzoeRGXT1qzgezio1_r2_400.gif

[Giggles]

I've only seen Ayoade in IT Crowd but IT Crowd is one of my favorite shows ever so I'm biased.

I love it myself, which is why I was extra disappointed when he turned up on everything else and was mostly shit.

[Lewis]

Toadie's long-dead wife just turned up in Neighbours pleading memory loss. You did this with Harold Bishop, you boring cunts.

[Boydy]

Mate, get a job.

[John]

Home and Away is the better of the Aussie soaps now, and it's also complete drivel. They seem desperate to turn it into a hardboiled crime story, but there's a family in witness protection who must be ready to move and change their names on a moment's notice yet one of them somehow has a good enough CV to be the head of emergency in the local hospital and another can get a business loan while unemployed to buy out the local restaurant.

[Spammer]

Sunset Beach was better than both of them in the shit soap category.

As for other Aussie TV shows, Round the Twist shits all over both too.

[Magic]

The only reality TV I watch is Masterchef and Masterchef: The Professionals. Everything else can die.

[Lewis]

Mate, get a job.

I would make time for it even if I was employed.

[John]

Round The Twist was crap once you got past the brilliant theme tune.

[Magic]

What was that book where some shit cunt from England moved over to Australia and opened an orange fish and chip shop (or something)? We read it in primary school and it was so amazing dreaming about hope and Australia rather than the dreadful, dreary scenery that surrounded me both physically and emotionally.

Might read it again, actually.

EDIT: Misery Guts! And also didn't they make a TV show about it?

[Boydy]

We read it in primary school and it was so amazing dreaming about hope and Australia rather than the dreadful, dreary scenery that surrounded me both physically and emotionally.

:(

[leedsrevolution]

What was that book where some shit cunt from England moved over to Australia and opened an orange fish and chip shop (or something)? We read it in primary school and it was so amazing dreaming about hope and Australia rather than the dreadful, dreary scenery that surrounded me both physically and emotionally.

Might read it again, actually.

EDIT: Misery Guts! And also didn't they make a TV show about it?

Fucking hell. Do you need a hug or something?

[Jimmy Floyd]

I had to read about Chip and Bill or some other aryan cunts that the Tory government probably made up to justify the poll tax. I can only imagine that under Blair they were retconned into being black and from a broken home, although the vile bitch Jacqueline Wilson more or less had that covered.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

I hated the books I had to read at school.

They were all so dull.

Going home and reading Goosebumps though :cool:

[Offshore Toon]

Biff and Chip, Jimmy? Hairy Maclary was a total don. Spot The Dog was cool, too.

[Baz]

Round The Twist was crap once you got past the brilliant theme tune.Was Pugwall Australian? My underrated favourite was The Wayne Manifesto. Had a boss theme tune and all.

As for Dee returning it was a bit turd reusing the washed up on a beach story again, but I enjoyed it nonetheless.

[niko_cee]

Biff and Chip (and Kipper) feature in my daughter's phonics books. All still super white.

They have an Asian family who live next door and the granddad is a dead ringer for Rupert Murdoch, which I'm sure is intended on some level.

[wullie]

The Dee return was a bit underplayed. They had Toadie saying a photo of her could be anyone despite it being a crystal clear hi-res picture of her face, and then she just turns up at the door to say hi. At least with Harold Bishop they went off and found him living a secret life in the Salvation Army.

Has Lou Carpenter died?

[Disco]

How can she have been missing, didn't she die in the most hilarious car crash ever?

[Lewis]

The story is that she couldn't swim in her wedding dress, got swept away, thumped her head and got some memory/depression problems, and then BOTTLED showing her face for a decade (she referred to Steph Scully and Max Hoyland [legend] getting married, which must have been about eighteen months after the crash). Oh. Fair enough, love. You just take your time.

Lou Carpenter is still alive, and he pops up every now and again claiming to have been in Cambodia for six months, but never going into any detail. Right. Back away.

[Disco]

Swept away in a lake? I feel like neighbours is betraying me here, KK should out her as an imposter. He's still around right? Because there's basically no point without him.

[wullie]

Karl and Susan still being together was the biggest surprise, he must have been off with a load of floozies in the past decade going by previous form.

[Lewis]

It was in the sea (he crashed a minibus coming back from a wedding as well about ten years ago, the fucking jinx). Karl Kennedy is still around, fulfilling the roles of about a dozen medical professionals by himself. That's probably how his wife only had MS for about three months until it became inconvenient to write around.

Neighbours. :drool:

[Giggles]

I need to get back on it.

[niko_cee]

Didn't the actual Dee have something go badly wrong with her in real life which led to her swift departure? And by the time she was fixed she had bigger fish to try with that Melburnian prostitute series, which I presume has run its course.

[Lewis]

I don't know. I'm not that into it.

[Boydy]

Does anyone watch Silent Witness? I watched last night's episode and thought it was pretty bad but I was still intrigued by what happened. Put tonight's on and they were basically ripping off Buried so turned it off.

That main woman and that Northern Irish lad are shit actors too.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

http://www.bbc.co.uk/newsbeat/article/38824698/entrepreneurs-nick-jenkins-and-sarah-willingham-are-leaving-dragons-den

I'm going to miss Nick, I liked him a lot.

[wullie]

Neighbours has aced it with this Dee return.

It's just some woman who looks exactly like his wife, one rung below 'Bouncer's dream' on the mad storyline ladder

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

This 'Five Gold Rings' on ITV is so shit and yet I can't turn it over.

It's spot the ball with two teams of dickheads.

[Giggles]

I don't think they've ever made a good TV show in their history. Thankfully I don't even have the channel any more to land on it by accident.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

How do you not have ITV1?

Also, The Chase is amazing.

Edit: Doc Martin is mega too.

[Giggles]

How do you not have ITV1?

Also, The Chase is amazing.

They replaced it a few years ago with UTV Ireland, then that recently folded but ITV proper never returned. TV3 still shows an awful lot of their shit here still unfortunately (coronation street, emmmerdale farm, xfactor, the assault course thing, etc). Don't get Ch5 either.

EDIT: Doc Martin? I stand by my happiness at the lack of ITV.

[Lewis]

It's great how they just write Paul Robinson new kids/ex-wives in whenever it suits.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

That little kid bitchslapping Amanda Holden :drool:

[Giggles]

Professional kitchen episode on Masterchef. Ugh.

Make my food exactly as I have shown you.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

I hate 'DJ Lyndsay' so much.

Although that was obvious as soon as her name was popped up with that spelling.

[Giggles]

Samantha Mumba is presenting some tripe on TV this evening (basically a thing like the One Show). The head hasn't aged the best, and the forehead is still far too big, but she has a serious set of cans on her.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

I've just seen that the Great British Menu is back.

http://www.radiotimes.com/news/2017-05-02/new-great-british-menu-judge-andi-oliver-a-middle-aged-black-woman-on-tv-double-hooray

But that? Fucking hell :face:

[Giggles]

Must have missed the above post. Was this the first week? Only caught the end tonight.

Also, proper Masterchef episode after a week of toss :cool:

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Yeah, it was the first week.

[Giggles]

A Michelin star chef that's not an absolute cock. I didn't think such a thing existed.

[Adamski]

Just watched that Giggles. He's a cracking bloke.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Paul Ainsworth? He's brilliant and a top bloke.

He was brilliant on the Great British Menu too.

http://www.thecriticalcouple.com/uploads/2/8/1/1/2811540/7826852_orig.jpg

Glorious.

[Giggles]

The banter on Pointless is gone to fuck :face:

[leedsrevolution]

I've never watched Great British Menu before. I'm literally so fucking hooked. "I liked how you caramelised the onion, the presentation was good . . . . . . HOWEVER"

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

It's amazing.

Still the best moment ever was when Johnnie Mountain walked out in a fit of SEETHE after Marcus Wareing gave his dish 2 years ago.

[niko_cee]

He used to have a place next to my wife's office in london. It was absolute shite and lasted about 6 months.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

This one:

https://www.thecaterer.com/articles/349678/great-british-menu-chef-johnnie-mountain-brands-closed-english-pig-a-disaster

[niko_cee]

Yeah, although it wasn't there, it was on Aldersgate Street and this was probably more like 2010/11.

[Giggles]

When do we get normal Crystal Maze instead of this C-Lister shite? It was bad enough that they got Ayoade.

[Giggles]

'Celebrity' Masterchef starts tonight.



1. Rachel Stevens, Former S Club 7 star

2. Rebecca Adlington, Olympic champion

3. Vic Reeves (Jim Moir), Comedian

4. Angellica Bell, TV presenter

5. Ulrika Jonsson, Presenter

6. Stephen Hendry, Snooker champion

7. Patti Boulaye, Singer

8. Lesley Garrett, Singer

9. Jaymi Hensley, Union J singer

10. Henri Leconte, French tennis ace

11. Debbie McGee, Paul Daniels' widow

12. Tyger Drew-Honey, Outnumbered actor

13. Brian Bovell, Film actor

14. Nick Moran, Lock, Stock And Two Smoking Barrels star

15. Reverend Kate Bottley, from Gogglebox

16. Julia Somerville, Presenter

17. Abdullah Afzal, Comedian

18. Dev Griffin, Radio 1 DJ

19. Barney Harwood, Children's TV presenter

20. Aasmah Mir, Scottish broadcaster

[Baz]

Dev to win. :cool:

Is Angellica Bell still fit?

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Adlington is one of my shameful lustages so 'mon her.

I hate 'The reverend' goes out quick, she's a twat and seems to become worse with every extra bit of fame she garners.

[Giggles]

Adlington is one of my shameful lustages so 'mon her.

I hate 'The reverend' goes out quick, she's a twat and seems to become worse with every extra bit of fame she garners.

I couldn't agree more with both parts of a post.

[Giggles]

Actually scratch the first part, I was thinking of Pendleton.

[Shindig]

More importantly, who will Ulrika shag?

[John]

In Pointless just now the final question was about Olympic jumping event medalists. They went for Greg Rutherford, Bob Beamon, and Carl Lewis as long jumpers. Every long jump medallist since 1968 or something was a pointless answer other than those three. Unlucky, lads.

[John]

Today's Pointless has a man with one of those electronic voice boxes being almost impossible to understand. He could claim he said just about anything for any answer and I'd buy it.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Finally caught up with Masterchef and my word does Rachel Stevens look fucking amazing, she looks better now than the S Club 7 days.

[Giggles]

New Project Binky :drool:

[Baz]

X-Factor.

Rak-su are quality.

:rave:

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/entertainment-arts-41817713

Prue Leith apparently tweeted who won Bake Off this morning.

Lol at all the Twitter wankers who had it spoiled.

[Giggles]

Why the fuck doesn't the article say who she said won it?

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Because they don't want to spoil it...

[Giggles]

Ah, found it.

[Giggles]

Because they don't want to spoil it...

I've just stuck it on mine anyway.

[Baz]

Why the fuck doesn't the article say who she said won it?The winner is...

http://media.immediate.co.uk/volatile/sites/3/2017/08/GBBO8-Baker-Portrait-Sophie-1162.jpg?quality=90&lb=1024,1024&background=white

[John]

Why the fuck doesn't the article say who she said won it?

Because it's an article about her being a shit for spoiling it. It'd be a bit mad for them to do the same thing while slapping her for it.

[Magic]

Can we bet on the winner? :eyemouth:

[Giggles]

The winner is...

http://media.immediate.co.uk/volatile/sites/3/2017/08/GBBO8-Baker-Portrait-Sophie-1162.jpg?quality=90&lb=1024,1024&background=white

Would.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Just finished watching it, she was always going to win. Sophie has been nailed on to win for weeks.

[Giggles]

So long as Phteven didn't.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Marcus Wareing is a don.

[Pleb]

Amir Khan heading into the "I'm the Celebrity" jungle not seeing the actual program.

Muppet.

[Baz]

Amir Khan heading into the "I'm the Celebrity" jungle not seeing the actual program.

Muppet.People also dug up a [since deleted] 2012 tweet where someone asked if he’d go in and he said no because it was for has-beens.

Joey Barton claims he turned down £500k to do it.

[Pleb]

Not to worry Khan is earning £250k to do this according to my mother.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/entertainment-arts-42057367

Paul Hollywood has accused former Bake Off presenters and fellow judge Mary Berry of "abandoning" the show.

Mary Berry, along with presenters Mel Giedroyc and Sue Perkins, left the programme when it was announced it was moving to Channel 4.

Speaking to the Radio Times, Hollywood said the criticism he received when he decided to stay was "not fun".

Shots fired.

This is proper lol though:

He said he "became the most hated man in the country".

[Byron]

I read that and laughed. Mate, the reason you're hated is because you're an orange gorilla who pervs on every female contestant under the age of 25 and cheats on his wife.

[Baz]

I read that and laughed. Mate, the reason you're hated is because you're an orange gorilla who pervs on every female contestant under the age of 25 and cheats on his wife.

Not anymore. She's left him. :huhu:

[Giggles]

I'd die a happy man if I was to the balls in Gemma Atkinson at the time.

[Shindig]

Anybody who has bread as their baking prowess deserves to be on a register.

[Giggles]

Len Goodmans Partners in Rhyme is the worst thing I think I've ever seen on TV. Who the fuck thought giving him a quiz to host would have been a good idea or is it some parting gift from the BBC?

[niko_cee]

I only saw the first minute or so of it the other week but can confirm it was one of the worst televisual minutes of my life. Not even 'BBC funny'.

[John]

I'd think of it more as a parting fuck off. If that format had more than fifteen seconds of thought put into it I'd be stunned.

[niko_cee]

I can't help but think of Edward Norton's character in Primal Fear whenever I see Craig on the professional Masterchef. Hopefully Roy manifests and stabs Greg in the final.

[Giggles]

Not before he gives Wareing a kick in the neck I hope.

[niko_cee]

:D

I had Marcus in for the stabbing originally, then thought Greg would probably be the better victim. If only so he doesn't blight the schedule with so many other programmes.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Wareing is all wrong on the telly. Like a Shakesperean actor who can't get work as King Lear or Duncan trying to play a TV chef.

[Lewis]

The League of Gentlemen is back for some Christmas specials. Fucking hell if it's shit.

[Jimmy Floyd]

The League of Gentlemen is back for some Christmas specials. Fucking hell if it's shit.

I've recently been watching (re-watching in some cases) everything they've ever done, so horribly underrated.

[Lewis]

Inside No. 9 is extremely hit and miss, but Psychoville never got anywhere near the praise it deserved.

[Jimmy Floyd]

It's done in such a way that the misses don't really matter though.

LoG itself is also underrated, I guess they're just too dark to do numbers.

[Pleb]

This Dating In The Dark on ITVBe at the moment :D

Proper Reality TV cringe this.

[Shindig]

Inside No. 9 is extremely hit and miss, but Psychoville never got anywhere near the praise it deserved.

Aye. Especially the way series two went.

[wullie]

I remember not being too keen on the LOG last series at the time as it was a bit of a departure but it stands up really well, high hopes and crossed fingers for this.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Just watched the first one of the new League of Gentlemen, spot on I thought.

[Lewis]

Why is Eastenders making Max Branning out to be the villain in all of this? Man was set up.

[Lewis]

The League of Gentlemen is back for some Christmas specials. Fucking hell if it's shit.

NOT shit. :cool:

[Jimmy Floyd]

They needed another three half hours really, although the fact that I'm saying that probably means it's good that they didn't.

[Lewis]

Can you let this (https://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2017/dec/18/rita-sue-bob-too-kes-yosser-league-of-gentlemen) twat know that you and your four million pound house liked it?

[Giggles]

Was it not always shit?

[Jimmy Floyd]

Can you let this (https://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2017/dec/18/rita-sue-bob-too-kes-yosser-league-of-gentlemen) twat know that you and your four million pound house liked it?

What does he think he's watching exactly? Two paragraphs on fucking Kes.

[John]

I'm calling bullshit on the bit about him hearing exactly what his teacher whispered over the sound of the television.

He sounds like a complete arsehole.

[John]

Ed Miliband turned up on the Last Leg tonight and you've never seen such stilted delivery of obviously prepared material. Took three attempts and a hilariously shaky arm to get on the back of a motorcycle on the way out too.

[Lewis]

Ed Miliband making fun of himself is the only thing that stops people realising he is the most tragic figure in British politics.

[John]

He's back on now dressed as Santa giving out gifts, like toilet roll with Jacob Rhys Mogg's face on it, or Mogg Roll as it's been dubbed. Properly tragic.

[John]

He's there to plug his fucking podcast. :D

[Baz]

Celeb Big Brother starts tomorrow. Dapper Laughs to win with ease? :sick:

[Giggles]

I've landed on this Taskmaster thing for the first time but, as much as I like Davies and Dave Gorman, the sum total of fuck all has happened so far. Is it just a chat show kind of thing and the 'tasks' are secondary or less?

[Baz]

I've landed on this Taskmaster thing for the first time but, as much as I like Davies and Dave Gorman, the sum total of fuck all has happened so far. Is it just a chat show kind of thing and the 'tasks' are secondary or less?Stick with it.

[Giggles]

It got better. Are these new or old? It's hard to know on Dave.

The head on Al Murray makes me think fairly recent.

[wullie]

Al Murray was in S2 or 3 but none of them are very old, I think they rattled through five series in about two years.

[-james-]

Watched most of it twice now I think. Dave Gorman's potato snowman has to be up there as one of the best bits.

[Baz]

Anyone else watching Celebrity Big Brother? It's absolutely class. I'm properly loving it.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

There's a disabled transvestite on Pointless today, they're really trying to get the quotas filled.

[phonics]

God, you're such a prick.

[Lewis]

There's a disabled transvestite on Pointless today, they're really trying to get the quotas filled.

Looks like Lofty.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Looks like Lofty.

I can now see her in a rollercoaster.

[Disco]

There's a disabled transvestite on Pointless today, they're really trying to get the quotas filled.

When are you and Magic going on?

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

When are you and Magic going on?

The bloke that runs the thing told me that no professionals are allowed. I said I'm not a professional, he said that I should be and that I'd probably be the best in the country. Told him I wasn't interested as I'm making shit loads out of computers.

[Disco]

That and you have to be in a room with more than four people at once.

[John]

The bloke that runs the thing told me that no professionals are allowed. I said I'm not a professional, he said that I should be and that I'd probably be the best in the country. Told him I wasn't interested as I'm making shit loads out of computers.

Professionally pointless. Sounds correct.

[Jimmy Floyd]

If I brushed up on my soaps and rubbish cocktails, that is to say cocktails, I reckon I could turn pro on the Pointless circuit.

[Lewis]

I would throw the game and then call that lanky one a dickhead.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

I would throw the game and then call that lanky one a dickhead.

He looks like the type of guy that could throw a copper over the Lamb pub in Chichester though and that's the real quiz.

[Giggles]

God, you're such a prick.

He's right though.

[Shindig]

That and you have to be in a room with more than four people at once.

Do chatrooms count?

[Giggles]

The prize money on Pointless is ridiculously bad.

[SvN]

I was just saying that. Catchphrase in the mid 90s was more lucrative

[Shindig]

Catchphrase wasn't on daily.

[Giggles]

They could at least jazz up the Saturday night charidee one.

[phonics]

Who's Going To Be A Millionaire is coming back and it'll be presented by *checks notes* Jeremy Clarkson?

[Giggles]

Did the gays on Gogglebox split up? I see one of them with some old woman now.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

They split years ago and one of them is married to another guy.

https://inews.co.uk/culture/channel-4-gogglebox-chris-butland-steed-leave-show-five-years/

The other one left so they stuck the one who didn't want to leave with his Mum.

[niko_cee]

They were never a couple, were they?

And how you could not pick the 'old woman' as that guy's mum is beyond me. They look almost identical.

[Lewis]

The remaining gay is the best person on the programme (which is crap).

[Giggles]

He seems to have stopped waving his filthy fucking bare feet in front of the camera now at least.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

They were never a couple, were they?

And how you could not pick the 'old woman' as that guy's mum is beyond me. They look almost identical.

They were at the start.

Also, the kid with an annoying Mum and Sister has an apprenticeship at number 10:

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbiz/article-4950178/Gogglebox-star-Josh-Tapper-break-show.html

He looks more like his Dad in that first photo than he ever did on the show.

[Lewis]

The sister finally became fatter than the dad last year. Has she kept expanding?

[Giggles]

What is the point of that homeless looking Angelos cunt with the plastic bag? About as funny as piles.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

No idea what you're watching but I think he's great. He's No George Dawes though.

[Giggles]

He was on Pointless.

[Baz]

People actually watch Gogglebox? :|

[Giggles]

It wouldn't be on if they didn't.

[Baz]

Well obviously middle-aged women watch it. I mean people who I have stuff in common with.

You'll all be watching that Mrs Browns shite next.

[Giggles]

I just watch whatever's on after I flick around a bit.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

I used to watch it, stopped some time last year though.

There was just too many annoying dickheads.

[Giggles]

The Mrs was watching some dancing thing earlier (our equivalent of Strictly) and Conor McGregor's sister looks like she'd ride you into the middle of next month.

[Giggles]

All in on Nawamin.

[Giggles]

He's shat it.

[niko_cee]

Kenny!

David Mitchell really is an utter bastard.

[Giggles]

Arry is going to be like Jimmy with those accents.

https://www.sportsjoe.ie/amp/football/harry-redknapp-gianluca-vialli-enter-world-gaa-management-157261

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Why do they need to keep forcing sob stories down our throats on reality TV shows?

BGT et al would be so much better without them.

[Giggles]

That's what sells to middle aged housewives and dipshit teenagers.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Aren't they tired of it now?

[Boydy]

Aren't you?

[Giggles]

All those shows are just about the judges playing up to the audience. Tripe.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Aren't you?

I like the actual talent.

[Bam]

Mug. :rosebud:

[Giggles]

They're having a laugh with this little twat as a judge on Crème de la Crème. How the fuck can some cunt who didn't even win the normal bakeoff judge stuff about ten levels higher than that one is operating at?

[Giggles]

This Time Next Year has to be the worst thing ever put on television.

[Shindig]

I hate it. I hope there's some horror stories that come out of it about people realising the resignations were real and they couldn't be rehired.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Ruby (the Indian) and the Frenchie on Bake Off :drool:

[Boom-Boom-18]

This whole story involving Ryan 'punching' Roxanne in Celebrity Big Brother is crazy. She has committed career suicide.

[Shindig]

Aye, he was just shadow boxing. Maybe she was just looking for a way out but there's better ways to do that.

[Giggles]

I'm not sure if it's because I watch less British TV now than I ever did our if they're just scraping the barrel, but I haven't a clue who 90% of all the ones on this series of Celebrity MasterChef are.

[Jimmy Floyd]

I've heard of 5 on the whole series, and one of those I only know as the rentboy-looking one from Strictly, rather than his actual name.

[niko_cee]

One of the all time great showings on University Challenge right now. London - Institute in Paris (what the fuck?) being led by some mook wearing a beret, all the way to about 10 points. Dear lord.

[Jimmy Floyd]

The tossers trying to be the next cult hit really do ruin it.

[igor_balis]

I've considered the optimum team balance for University Challenge a lot, because I'm that kinda guy, but I've come to accept that it's more important to just have one absolute freak who knows everything. Pretty sure there's been teams who've gotten to the semis and beyond with 2 of the team contributing about 40 points over the entire series.

Also, despite generally being against bullshit convoluted tournament structures, I love the fact the first round lasts about 4 months, because being a vaguely well-read academic jack of all trades gets about 70 points a week, then it gets to the second round and I'm pleased if i get a couple of bonuses.

[igor_balis]

Oh, and obviously the best bit of the show is the brief moments of smugness when the toff wankers reckon a Pulp song is by Pearl Jam or something.

[Lewis]

I can proudly say that I have never intentionally watched a single second of University Challenge.

[Jimmy Floyd]

I've considered the optimum team balance for University Challenge a lot, because I'm that kinda guy, but I've come to accept that it's more important to just have one absolute freak who knows everything. Pretty sure there's been teams who've gotten to the semis and beyond with 2 of the team contributing about 40 points over the entire series.

Also, despite generally being against bullshit convoluted tournament structures, I love the fact the first round lasts about 4 months, because being a vaguely well-read academic jack of all trades gets about 70 points a week, then it gets to the second round and I'm pleased if i get a couple of bonuses.

Correct, having a well balanced array of knowledge will always lose to Monkman or Guttenplan blowing the doors off.

[Giggles]

State of that can of shite on the Great British Menu. Is it a wig?

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

State of that can of shite on the Great British Menu. Is it a wig?

I don't believe it is.

He's always got mental hair.

[Giggles]

I've just sat through ten minutes of League of Gentlemen. Was Mark Gatiss in it all?

[phonics]

I've just sat through ten minutes of League of Gentlemen. Was Mark Gatiss in it all?


Yeah he was in loads of it. The Butcher being genuinely one of the creepiest characters. The terrible Vet being the funniest imo.

[Giggles]

Took me most of it to figure out who he was. It'd have been two minutes otherwise.

[Shindig]

I need to watch the Anniversary Specials.

[Giggles]

Has that one on the bake off had surgery to look oriental?

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

If Ruby doesn't win tonight we riot.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Of course Kim-Joy and her husband met at a board games meeting.

[niko_cee]

:D

Said the same thing.

I suppose Cosplay might have been in the running.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

:D

Said the same thing.

I suppose Cosplay might have been in the running.

She's the most stereotypical weeb ever.

I hate her so much.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Bullshit.

The tent needs to be burned to the ground.

[niko_cee]

Thank god she didn't win. She seemed to be getting quite cocky as well, but her seething at any negative comments always made the show, particularly at the end there.

[mugbull]

Rahul was good enough so fair play

[-james-]

I thought this season was a bit shit. Standard seemed a fair bit lower than previous years and not many particularly likeable contestants. I lost interest once the Welsh bloke and Manon were gone.

[SvN]

The technical in the final was a disgrace.

[niko_cee]

Agreed. It was just an overblown dip-making/lolling exercise. It was impossible to get right through anything other than blind luck - but then again, in the final the first two challenges are entirely redundant. You'd have to actually shit on a plate twice to make it anything other than a showstopper-showdown. The whole series has been wank and Kim-Joy winning it might just have been the nail in the coffin for it.

[-james-]

Nothing will ever top Bingate.

https://img.buzzfeed.com/buzzfeed-static/static/2014-08/27/16/enhanced/webdr01/anigif_enhanced-3860-1409170409-25.gif

[mugbull]

Lol at you peoples’ scathing hatred of Kim-Joy. She was great honestly.

Final technical was ass though

[Pleb]

Lego Masters is back next week.

Lego :drool: :cool:

[Giggles]

Christ they've given that Liam wanker off Bake Off his own show.

[mugbull]

He's a cool guy but there's no way he should have a fucking TV show. I read about it and apparently it's pure ass

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

He's a likeable fellow who was on a super popular show.

I'm surprised it took them this long.

[niko_cee]

Did anyone else see John Stones' doppelganger on Masterchef tonight?

Has he got a twin brother?

[Giggles]

RTÉ have some show on about the election here in 1918 but it's done like as if it was today with reports from counts and all. Fucking hell :D

[Giggles]

Sweet lamb of Jesus.

1073653347897360384

[Disco]

I wonder who'll win this time.

[Giggles]

I wonder who'll win this time.

It's all on tenterhooks at the moment. Not sure what way it'll go.

[SincereTheRebel]

After years of convincing. Im finally decided to start watching some recommended tv shows. All ive heard is tv shows like breaking bad, sons of anarchy, john snow, etc. Currently on episode 6 of the making of a murderer and it is very interesting. No idea how they can record the story in real time. How is stuff like that even possible.

[Spikey M]

Sweet lamb of Jesus.

1073653347897360384

What happened 100 year ago? Is that when you dumped our lot?

[Giggles]

What happened 100 year ago? Is that when you dumped our lot?

Nothing really, was more just the election that showed people in general turning towards independence (plus women got the vote) after Britains fuck up in 1916. Token independence didn't happen until 1921 and not properly until 1949.

[Boydy]

Some might say proper independence still hasn't happened.

[Giggles]

Some might say proper independence still hasn't happened.

Fantasists. We've no more claim to there than we have to Scotland, England, or Wales.

[Jimmy Floyd]

I can't wait until it does happen and half a million loyalist refugees are welcomed onto the mainland with street parties. Vote Leave, Take Back Control.

[Spikey M]

Nothing really, was more just the election that showed people in general turning towards independence (plus women got the vote) after Britains fuck up in 1916. Token independence didn't happen until 1921 and not properly until 1949.

Odd (sorry Jim). I quite like the concept, if it wad a landmark election that changed everything, but for a bit of a nothing election it seems like a waste of time.

That said, I'd watch a re-enactment of Gordan Brown's premiership. We could have David Mitchell calling Helen Mirren a racist old cunt before selling a truck load of gold to Bruce Lee for £7.50.

Get Jimmy and Lewis on the script.

[Giggles]

Odd (sorry Jim). I quite like the concept, if it wad a landmark election that changed everything, but for a bit of a nothing election it seems like a waste of time.

That said, I'd watch a re-enactment of Gordan Brown's premiership. We could have David Mitchell calling Helen Mirren a racist old cunt before selling a truck load of gold to Bruce Lee for £7.50.

Get Jimmy and Lewis on the script.

It was landmark for the fact it was a SF landslide showing what appetite people had for freedom. They were still UK Westminster elections though.

[Kikó]

After years of convincing. Im finally decided to start watching some recommended tv shows. All ive heard is tv shows like breaking bad, sons of anarchy, john snow, etc. Currently on episode 6 of the making of a murderer and it is very interesting. No idea how they can record the story in real time. How is stuff like that even possible.

John Snow isn't a programme sincere.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Channel 4 News is though.

[Giggles]

They've fucking re-made Magnum PI. State of the cunt in it too.

[Pleb]

Baz mate, did you just do Flithy Dancing? :baz:

[Baz]

Baz mate, did you just do Flithy Dancing? :baz:I don’t even understand that question.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Exose (who was also on Bake Off: The Professionals) is absolutely smashing it in Masterchef.

The dessert he made today inspired by banoffee pie looked the business.

[SincereTheRebel]

The Renault Clio ad about the two girls and their liquor license is one of the best adverts Ive seen in a long time. Emotional.


https://youtu.be/MrNCVAqbCD0

[Giggles]

All I see is an advert advocating cheating. Why did she get married at all?

Also why does nearly every ad now have to have a croaky sleepy sounding female version of a song in the background?

[Shindig]

Yes. And every trailer has a slow cover of a much better song.

[igor_balis]

Yes. And every trailer has a slow cover of a much better song.

The sub-Mumford together in electric dreams cover in that cider advert makes me want to go teetotal.

[Lewis]

Or postal. Hateful advert.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Exose (who was also on Bake Off: The Professionals) is absolutely smashing it in Masterchef.

The dessert he made today inspired by banoffee pie looked the business.

You say that but in the early skills test he appeared never to have heard of an artichoke. Are they not looking for something a bit more rounded than flamboyant cake baking?

[niko_cee]

He got through that first round entirely on the back of Monica fancying him.

[Giggles]

That Robbie Williams Tiger thing looks like mankind’s worst creation.

[niko_cee]

They'd better not ruin The Tiger Who Came For Tea. :mad:

[Shindig]

The Tiger Who Came. There, it's ruined.

[Baz]

That Robbie Williams Tiger thing looks like mankind’s worst creation.
What’s this?

[Giggles]

What’s this?

The thing they’re talking about above. I couldn’t think of the name but he’s singing in the ad that’s on about 800 times a day. It looks fucking awful.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

What’s this?


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HG4f-Ggddvc

[Shindig]

Oof. Just watch this instead.


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PoLasHK-jHE

Scots is bollocks.

[Giggles]

This real person/hologram thing on Sky One is extremely well executed.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Why is everything on TV so dreary and downbeat?

Currently the options on terrestrial are something murders, something about people being abused in the church, something about A&E, whatever freak show is on 5, and Tottenham Hotspur.

Why can't there be something cheerful and/or uplifting on ever?

[Baz]

Love Island, mate.

[John]

Love Island is the end of days. It's Big Brother but conceived by a twelve year old boy whose mum has put the parental lock on his internet.

[Giggles]

This Channel 4 show on amazon is the most hastily thrown together shite I’ve seen in a long time. It’s like a kids show.

[Giggles]

Why do they repeat the kitchen episodes of the Great British Menu on the weekend but never the judges episode (ie, the only good bit)?

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

I prefer the kitchen bits as I find the chefs much more interesting.

More chefs > Judges.

[Giggles]

It’s still very odd that they’d repeat the whole week bar the last episode of it.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

It’s still very odd that they’d repeat the whole week bar the last episode of it.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/b0071y6r/broadcasts/upcoming

Says it's on tomorrow.

Also, I had no idea that it was the finals already next week :(

[Giggles]

Eastenders has gone really fucking weird.

[Don]

https://youtu.be/yr_NRHBn_xk

https://media.giphy.com/media/cQtlhD48EG0SY/giphy.gif

[Pepe]

Shiiiiiii....

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Maya Jama though :drool:

[Giggles]

I’m just waiting for James Acaster to be presenting the news and weather because he’s on fucking everything else lately. What’s exactly does he do?

[Giggles]

Also, Mahow is correct. She is some bit of biscuit.

[Spikey M]

I’m just waiting for James Acaster to be presenting the news and weather because he’s on fucking everything else lately. What’s exactly does he do?

Says stupid shit in a stupid voice with his stupid face.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

James Acaster is great.

[Spikey M]

Says the shit Brother with a shit hand and a shit satellite dish.