A new football thread, for fuck's sake

[Mazuuurk]

Yeah I'm lightning fast like that :cool:

[Danny]

TAA :face:

https://imgur.com/a/IoBbyEN

[Shindig]

Oh, God. I feel like you can't even congratulate him for it.

[phonics]

How desperate do you need to be as a footballer. Surely you can have anyone. This chick must be mint.

[Jimmy Floyd]

It reads like vile arrogance to me rather than desperation.

[Giggles]

That was all far too long for me to read. Plus I've no idea who TAA is.

[phonics]

That was all far too long for me to read. Plus I've no idea who TAA is.

Alexander-Arnold, the Liverpool left back. I skimmed it and closed the tab when he started posting pictures of half eaten bananas.

[Gray Fox]

That's Liverpool and Englands best right back to you. No idea what he's playing at here though.

[Yevrah]

Apparently Roberto Martinez is favourite for the Real Madrid job.

[Lewis]

Him and Conte are both big Lukaku fans, and they are the only club stupid enough to buy him off United. I don't know how he would have done it, but this has MIND GAME written all over it.

[Jimmy Floyd]

I still don't know why Real Madrid wanked so much money on a goalkeeper when they had a perfectly serviceable one, but haven't even attempted to replace Ronaldo in any shape or form. Not that you could replace him, but they've literally just ghosted his spot in the squad.

[John]

I don't even think Courtois has been getting a game, and now they look likely to appoint the man who soured him on Chelsea.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Courtois does the La Liga games.

[phonics]

I still don't know why Real Madrid wanked so much money on a goalkeeper when they had a perfectly serviceable one, but haven't even attempted to replace Ronaldo in any shape or form. Not that you could replace him, but they've literally just ghosted his spot in the squad.

Neymar. I think they'd have moved for him this summer if he hadn't had a shit world cup but he'll be there next year. It's weird they still have the Adidas deal considering they keep getting Nike's biggest star in as a Galactico. You'd think they'd pay a premium for the synergy.


I don't even think Courtois has been getting a game, and now they look likely to appoint the man who soured him on Chelsea.

Courtois always seemed more well thought of by journalists than any Chelsea fan you'd speak to which should always set alarm bells ringing.

[phonics]

After bringing up the Adidas/Nike thing I started looking at their sponsorships and started looking at the LeBron deal.

Found an article from 2002:
https://i.imgur.com/pDsuvVQ.png

Juice worth 349 million dollars in signature shoe sales alone.

[Ian]

It reads like vile arrogance to me rather than desperation.

Yeah he's basically just gone 'bet I could make her let me fuck her for this father's day message.'

Though other than to either court the attention or get this so she can release it online I dunno why she hasn't just blocked him the moment it becomes apparent he's an awful person.

[Baz]

TAA :face:

https://imgur.com/a/IoBbyEN
Lad.

[SincereTheRebel]

Trent is just trying to get his swerve on. I hear pregnant pussy is fire too. Cant blame him. I dont see the issue hear.

Real Madrid will try and get Kane at some point.

[mugbull]

Lmao. What a total prick he is, though I bet most footballers probably have a similar vibe

[phonics]

The Carabao Cup is so dull we didn't even bother making a thread it seems so I'll use this one.

Guendozi got sent off last night so he'll be suspended against Liverpool in the league. I was confused by this as I thought they'd changed it so that suspensions only applied to that domestic cup competition but as it turns out... He got sent off for 2 yellows, which carries across but if he got a straight red then the suspension would only apply to the Carabao Cup :cab:

[Jimmy Floyd]

Someone's fucked up there, there are a couple of scenarios I can think of in which that would incentivise dangerous or reckless play.

[niko_cee]

That seems an odd way to interpret that idea (I'd heard about it earlier in the season as well). I reckon the best approach would be for a suspension to apply to the current season's cup competition if you are still in it, but the league for any carry-over if/once you are out. That Copa Del Rey rule they used to have on FM where violent conduct got you banned from the cup for about 4 years always did my head in.

Meanwhile, in Germany, Rafinha has been dressing up as an Arab carrying a box of explosives.

:D

[Baz]

If I was a player who was already on a yellow and fouled someone and thought I was gonna get booked, I'd kick someone to change it to a straight red. Nobody cares about missing cup games.

[niko_cee]

Does the rule work the other way (ie league suspensions have to be served in league games)? Has it been brought in to combat all those mysterious 5th yellow cards that crop up before cup ties?

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-46058896

"Basically, I loved kicking Andrew Cole," Ruddock told Talksport.

"I know this is not big or clever but in one tackle I broke both his legs, because he annoyed me."

Explaining the reason for the horror tackle, which sidelined Cole for several months, Ruddock said: "I'm great friends with Teddy Sheringham and Teddy Sheringham didn't like him - and if Teddy Sheringham didn't like him, I don't like him."

What a prick.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Getting second reffed as 'the burly defender' must sting, even for Ruddock.

[Kikó]

He should be banned from football.

[niko_cee]

The two things I've taken from that is that he may have intentionally broken his legs, yet he still has the courtesy to refer to him by his preferred moniker (Andrew) and that I respect Cole a lot more for harbouring a deep-seated hatred of Teddy Sheringham, who you've only ever had to look at to know must be an absolutely despicable person.

[Ian]

Wait, Neil Ruddock was a cunt? Surely not.

[Lewis]

Would he have grounds to sue him? Lost bonuses or whatever (probably about two grand after inflation).

[Jimmy Floyd]

https://www.bbc.co.uk/sounds/play/p06q5q20

For some reason all eight on that selection make me lol. I think the first track may well be the worst piece of music ever composed.

[SvN]

I bet he googled for an Oasis track beforehand to humour the City fans.

[phonics]

The two things I've taken from that is that he may have intentionally broken his legs, yet he still has the courtesy to refer to him by his preferred moniker (Andrew) and that I respect Cole a lot more for harbouring a deep-seated hatred of Teddy Sheringham, who you've only ever had to look at to know must be an absolutely despicable person.

I always wondered why he went from Andy to Andrew and apparently it's because of an appearance on SoccerAM


Cole explained how he was once asked what his parents call him, to which he replied Andrew, with the media then running away with the soundbite to claim that he no longer wanted to be referred to as Andy.



Would he have grounds to sue him? Lost bonuses or whatever (probably about two grand after inflation).

10 year statute of limitations on civil cases with a 1 year extension if it was only just found out which still leaves him 6 months short or so. I'd say Ruddock isn't smart enough to not tell that story for 10 years to cover himself legally but it's odd that he decides to tell the story now.

[niko_cee]

Just catching up on the lolfest up north.

Lennon and that 'keeper going down like they'd been shot reminded me of good old Dida. One of the assistant refs being 'hit by a coffee cup' as well. Get the president of Madagascar on the blower.

I'm not sure what you'd be suing Ruddock for - some sort of tort? I don't think you could claim to have only just found out that you'd had your legs broken, which probably would have been the wrong. I think that 1 year thing is for 'hidden' defects/consequences you couldn't have known about at the time.

[phonics]

https://www.bbc.co.uk/sounds/play/p06q5q20

For some reason all eight on that selection make me lol. I think the first track may well be the worst piece of music ever composed.

It was a podcast he did with Guilleme Balague, it's the most stomach churning thing ever committed to the medium of podcasts.

[SvN]

I always wondered why he went from Andy to Andrew and apparently it's because of an appearance on SoccerAM






10 year statute of limitations on civil cases with a 1 year extension if it was only just found out which still leaves him 6 months short or so. I'd say Ruddock isn't smart enough to not tell that story for 10 years to cover himself legally but it's odd that he decides to tell the story now.

I'm not following you at all. This happened in 1996. How is this anywhere near 10 or 11 years?

Eit - It appears this interview is from 2010. Still nowhere near 10 years though.

[phonics]

I'm not following you at all. This happened in 1996. How is this anywhere near 10 or 11 years?

You know when you see something happened in 1996 and you just assume that was 10 years ago because you've forgot about the crushing weight of time passing? As you realise you're old and decrepit and you should just Logans Run yourself before it gets anyworse. That me.

[phonics]

Speaking of sickening Pep journos, none of the journalists hyping up Graham Hunters documentary will tell me whether Dr. Estadio Fuentes and his blood bags feature in a story about the greatest team in the world.

[Lewis]

Andy Farrell became Andrew Farrell in the lead up to his union move (chicken and egg that one), and now he's Andy Farrell again. You're alright with 'Andy'. It's one of the few diminutives you can get away with past a certain age without putting yourself across as a nonce/cunt.

[Pepe]

https://www.bbc.co.uk/sounds/play/p06q5q20I think the first track may well be the worst piece of music ever composed.

:D

It really is a shit song.

[John Arne]

Rooney missed a pen in the shootout as Columbus knocked out DC :D

3 of DC's pens were fucking awful.