Apprentice 2018: "Mumpreneur" Isn't A Fucking Word

[Ian]

First Episode Date: Wednesday - 03/10/2018 (not sure yet if there's a second episode on the Thursday, they sometimes do two in two days)
And in the first episode they're kicking off with one of my favourite episodes. Well TWO of them. It's the "buy these things as cheaply as you can" episode AND it's in Malta.

Meet the Candidates: On iPlayer (https://www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episode/p06jv20z/the-apprentice-series-14-1-meet-the-candidates)

https://static.standard.co.uk/s3fs-public/thumbnails/image/2018/09/25/10/Apprentice2509q.jpg?width=1368&height=912&fit=bounds&format=pjpg&auto=webp&quality=70

Candidate profiles: http://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/profiles/15Lwk4N39qBZY2qgC9gWpd1/meet-the-candidates

Gonna need to have a proper check of the profiles to decide which of them I hate the most but "Mumpreneur", "Call me Google" and "Like a mix of Willy Wonka drinking an espresso Martini" are all off to a good start.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

I was going to tell you to get the thread up so I'd like to think I had some part in this, despite not telling you to do so.

The first task is going to be fucking great.

Jasmine and Sarah Ann Magson are looking like the top options.

[wullie]

https://ichef.bbci.co.uk/images/ic/480xn/p06llm3q.jpg

I’ll be honest, I don’t eat, sleep, breathe business but I do eat, sleep and breathe success.



Straight out the door

[John]

I'm only here to turn 'mumpreneur' which is hateful, into 'munterpreneur', which scans better and made me smile.

[Ian]

Alex Finn citing Elon Musk as a role model. Unfortunate timing there.

[phonics]

Alex Finn citing Elon Musk as a role model. Unfortunate timing there.

You'd think he'd have Googled it considering...

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/Dn8AYm0XkAA3oVz.jpg

[phonics]

Half of these seem like they're written by The Onion.

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/Dn7e4CoXoAAQhWf.jpg
https://pbs.twimg.com/media/Dn7gTGwXkAI-aTM.jpg
https://pbs.twimg.com/media/Dn7cKauXUAAXap3.jpg

[Shindig]

Watch your back, Frank.

[Spikey M]

Surely when you’re ‘in front’ that’s exactly when you need to watch your back. Unless he’s Moonwalking? I bet he’s Moonwalking.

[wullie]

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/Dn7r-zhXUAAB7nW.jpg

Not pretending to be anyone else is why the acting gigs dried up.

[Boydy]

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/Dn7r-zhXUAAB7nW.jpg

Not pretending to be anyone else is why the acting gigs dried up.
:D

[Pepe]

Don't know what this is but all of those are seriously lol.

Someone mock up some of prominent TTH members.

[Raoul Duke]

Best bit is the guy with three hands:

https://ichef.bbci.co.uk/images/ic/480xn/p06llktw.jpg

[phonics]

Best bit is the guy with three hands:

So does the bloke who's two steps ahead.

[Pleb]

The girl in the yellow dress has dreamy eyes.

[7om]

Camilla can have some of my nut milk.

[Bernanke]

https://i.imgur.com/B6EKUgK.png

[Boom-Boom-18]

Is there anywhere online to watch previous seasons of the apprentice? I am happy to pay providing it can be streamed.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Realised I had forgotten to watch the final of last years.

I fucking hate double winners. Admittedly Sarah did well to elevate her business but still, what's the point?

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Although, according to Companies House the sweets are doing better (although they're both shit right now):

https://companycheck.co.uk/company/10370306/RIGHT-TIME-RECRUITMENT-LIMITED/financials

https://companycheck.co.uk/company/06823999/SWEETS-IN-THE-CITY-LIMITED/financials

[Ian]

Realised I had forgotten to watch the final of last years.

I fucking hate double winners. Admittedly Sarah did well to elevate her business but still, what's the point?

I remember reading this bit about the shithouse finale on the Guardian last year and it does sum up why it was such a fuck-up.


Alan Sugar is supposed to be the executioner. He creates a bull pit, forces a crowd of idiots to turn on each other and then stabs the weakest in the neck. That’s what he’s for. That’s all he’s for.

It really was a load of crap.

[Ian]

Tonight, lads.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Taz's cousin to go in week 1.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

The reception area :sick:

It's like a shit hotel trying to be more upmarket.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Do you stretch the octopus out? Is the hose the whole length?

:D

[Ian]

This octopus chat is amazing.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

They could probably really stretch one to about 75 inches tbh.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

A Northerner trying to talk to some Maltese people like they're retarded :D

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Fucking hell :D

[Ian]

They've bought an actual fucking octopus. Amazing.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

The women are a mess, they just want to pick fights.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

59 Euros please
Would you take 58.99

What's the fucking point?

[Ian]

59 euro on that legend giving them his shitey blind off the wall and they didn't even question it. Brilliant.

[Ian]

An actual octopus. What a time to be alive.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

A dead one though.

[wullie]

I don't think it can get better than the guy bartering a cent off the wine, it's Alan Partridge buying his house.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Jasmine will go but I think Jackie is a snake.

[Ian]

Somebody got very excited when they haggles 50p or something off a top hat too.

[wullie]

Are they usually this shouty this early?

[Ian]

The girls always seem to come across worse in week 1 losses. The boys save it for later when they know who they want a dick-measuring exercise with.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

A Northerner playing 'You feel you're better than me' card.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

I thought it was between Jasmine and Jackie tbh.

[wullie]

https://twitter.com/MsSarahByrne/status/1047578855282806784


I'd just not mention it

[Ian]

I think Sugar had just decided he couldn't be arsed with her gobbiness already.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Watching You're Fired and I can understand why he fired her.

Fucking hell, I don't know how anyone can be near her (well within earshot), she's so fucking loud and talkative.

I didn't think she was that bad on the show but I don't know if I can sit through this.

[Ian]

I thought even from the episode, and obviously Claude would have seen even more of her, that there'd be basically no dealing with her under any circumstances.

[Smiffy]

She was nearly enough to switch channel tbf. Gobby bitch.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

It's like they've never seen AR before.

WITCHCRAFT!

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Not picking the nerd who writes shit as PM, shambles.

[Ian]

MC Monkey?

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

I love tasks where they have to come up with names and shit.

Benji Beyond!

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

The girls character :D

[Ian]

I fucking hate that piercing.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

A slightly squashed onion parading round France collecting gold balls to teach a reader French? Fuck me.

[wullie]

Kayode has the biggest mouth I've ever seen.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Bonjoir...

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Get the balls on there

:D

[wullie]

Do you have music by actual musicians or should we just beatbox? Obviously we should do it, piece of piss

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

I think he's going to be waiting a long time for the Oscar he's dreamed of. Although it is pretty hard to move your head whilst talking.

[Ian]

Only the best actors can speak AND move to be fair to him.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Not wanting to put too many French words in an educational French comic book...

[wullie]

Guarantee the long-haired guy who is VITAL to the pitch stumbles over his words, put a monkey on it. Monster monster

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

The boys seem to have picked the ones with the least amount of charisma and personality.

[Ian]

The actor has the potential to be an all time classic if he hangs about.

Khadija is a nightmare.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

They might have never even heard of another language before :D

She's gone.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Not an ounce of charisma between the four of them.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Kurran even forgetting the PM's name :D

[Ian]

Kuran is amazing.

[P_3]

Fuck. 10000 copies?

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

How did the high street retailer (WHsmith?) order 10,000 copies?

They're both absolutely horrible.

[Ian]

What the fuck, Khadija?

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

What the fuck, Khadija?

He must have done something good...

[Ian]

I need Kuran to stay in until I've decided if he has less intelligence or personality

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

He could have probably gotten rid of all 3 tbh.

Although I'm glad Kurran didn't go as he could be good value.

[Spikey M]

I need Kuran to stay in until I've decided if he has less intelligence or personality

A vacuum is characterised by the non existence of all properties.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Earl Grey and custard cream doughnut :sick:

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Chocolate and chilli fine.

Dousing a doughnut in siracha, not so much.

[wullie]

Kurran's easily the star of this show.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Tom is absolutely shit.

If they lose he's gone, he's getting walked over by everyone.

[Giggles]

Haven't seen any of this til tonight but the imbecile levels are off the charts this time round by the looks of it.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Haven't seen any of this til tonight but the imbecile levels are off the charts this time round by the looks of it.

The peak was the boys thinking an octopus with a hose (snorkelling gear) was an actual octopus that had to be measured.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

I can only imagine that people buying these doughnuts will be blind with the inability to taste or just want to get on camera.

[SvN]

Kurran's easily the star of this show.

Indeed. And how he's broken his arm arm wrestling in the house :D

[Ian]

I thought Kurran's attempt at pitching might be his highlight until the daft twat managed to break his arm arm wrestling.

[wullie]

The odds are massively against it, but I hope he gets to the end just to see him in the interviews and hear his business proposal

https://frinkiac.com/img/S02E15/1245755.jpg

[SvN]

As good as he may be, he's got some way to go to beat the master

https://www.telegraph.co.uk/content/dam/tv/2016/09/26/dafts-2_trans_NvBQzQNjv4BqZgEkZX3M936N5BQK4Va8RWtT0gK_6E fZT336f62EI5U.jpg?imwidth=450

[Ian]

Vincent was a hero and part of some classic Apprentice moments but I think he had more about him than Kurran.

Who was it on here who made the amazing joke about Vincent and the muskateers?

[Ian]

"Who votes for me?"
*tumbleweed*

[Giggles]

"Who votes for me?"
*tumbleweed*

The pity vote in the end made it even worse.

[Ian]

Ogle her harder mate, she's definitely into it.

[Ian]

I don't think Kurran has said or done anything yet

[Giggles]

I don't think Kurran has said or done anything yet

He's a bit huffy.

[Ian]

He's a bit fucking shit is what he is.

[Ian]

Alex has to be gone.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

"Who votes for me?"
*tumbleweed*

I just started watching it, this was absolutely brilliant. Especially with Kurran then throwing in the pity vote.

Alex is amazing.

How many meters are they?
They're just over here and as you can see they're long...

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Kurran bottled it.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Kurran on the pitching team for a product he despises :drool:

[wullie]

There must be a big royalty cheque with Micky Flanagan's name on it after this episode. Khadija has the most natural bitchy face I've ever seen too

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

If this isn't the end of the road for Kurran I'll be stunned.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Actually, I'm going double with Rick.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Jackie is a fucking mess.

Kayode wasn't great but has good previous form. Rick is an absolute disgrace.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Alan :cool:

Triple firing, do it.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Bastard completely bottled it.

[Giggles]

Bottled that.

[Ian]

Sparing Kuran. What a cunt.

[wullie]

Horrible feeling Kurran's going to be a roaring success as PM next week rather than the best hour of TV of 2018 that I'm hoping for.

[Ian]

I did like that he said he knew nothing about women's shoes and then proceeded to be more opinionated than he has about anything in the rest of the series so far put together.

[wullie]

If he's still in the sling next week, either they film the whole thing over about five days or he's going full Cowboy Bob Orton and will eventually lamp Claude with his cast.

[Ian]

What was it he'd supposedly done to himself? A dislocation?

[SvN]

A fracture, I thought.

[Ian]

Then he'll be in a cast for a while but the big gimp needn't be in a sling, based on what j was told when I did mine. They've probably done that for effect.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Jet Pop and Strawpedo Air? Hmm.

Also, how is Kurran the only one who knows what Pangaea is?

[wullie]

The girl being portrayed as the boring killjoy with the advert production is the only one with any sense.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

lol at not putting Kayode on his pitching.

Edit: Bitch slapped :cool:

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Pop Jet :D

[wullie]

Keeping the vacay bursting into flames over the ocean

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

It looks like an explosion
An explosion of FUN!!!

[wullie]

I can't believe that Kurran's arguably the only person who should stay this week.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Karen Brady just absolutely donned those two useless twats.

[wullie]

'Let me deal with Khadija, then I'll deal with you'

Kurran's the best.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Kurran didn't deserve to be fired in this task but then he's deserved to be fired about 4 times already.

No idea how Camilla didn't go.

[Ian]

Should have been a triple firing. Kurran because fuck ALL the way off.

Daniel and Khadija for having the opportunity to drown the dopey twat in the sea and not doing it.

[SvN]

Currant was a mess from start to finish, including his task. How was Pangaea an appropriate name for a party airline? It made no sense at all.

His advert was ridiculous. I'm amazed noone brought up that he scrapped the storyboards and freestyled it.

He was by far the worst on this task, even if others were a shambles too. He can't manage at all, he's just a disrespectful idiot who thinks he's cleverer than he actually is. Even at the end he thought his advert was Spielberg.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Kurran has revealed that his Dad owned an airline (tour operator really) in the 90s.

It flew from Birmingham to Amritsar direct and was called Poo UK.

https://metro.co.uk/2018/11/08/what-was-the-airline-owned-by-apprentice-candidate-kurran-poonis-dad-8116829/

https://m.hindustantimes.com/india/indian-to-start-no-breaks-midlands-to-amritsar-flight/story-E3kAobYi9Fy886qOvwwcCL.html

So he's not the only mental one in the family.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Why does everything have to be 'Urban' these days?

[wullie]

Got to be Khadija on the way today.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

£2k for about 10 pot plants :D

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Khadija and Jackie are amazing.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Tom has to go.

Bought fuck all for the corporate, switched over to the sub team and forgot to tell the van where to go.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

His business plan must be shit because Kayode shouldn't have gone there.

[Ian]

Tom ought to have gone and had the other team lost it might have been a multiple but Kayode's issue is probably that beyond speaking with ill-deserved amounts of confidence he doesn't seem to offer much.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Camilla is an idiot.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

£800 for a ducks arse? £1200 for some gummi bears arranged into a door mat?

I hate art so much.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Daniel (with Kurran's wardrobe today) is really good at bullshitting.

[wullie]

Him happily admitting to not having a clue what he's talking about is the most self-awareness I've ever seen on this show, I love him now.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Karen said on You're Fired last week that he admitted that a lot throughout the process.

I think he's going to win it, I can't see any real opposition.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Could easily be a triple here.

Only Sian is safe.

[Ian]

Yeah Daniel's honest bullshittery is making me warm to him a lot.

The outcome tonight was the opposite of what I thought. I'd decided he was gonna get rid of Sabrina and Tom. Jasmine must have had a shit business plan.

[Browning]

The minute I saw Sabrina's corporate client I said to the Mrs "They have to sell them that stupid Gummy Bear sign", it was so fucking obvious, and yet they tried (and somehow... succeeded) to flog them the shitty owl instead. I'm shocked the client didn't walk out over them selling it under their nose to a random member of the public though.

Sabrina was always safe because Karen loves her. Every time they "step outside" Karen compliments her, and I think this week was the first time she actually added a criticism at the end. I fully expected Tom to go, even after Jasmine was fired. He shouldn't be there after last week.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

The way he was talking about his business, I'm expecting him to last until the interviews now.

He could have a damn good business idea.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

I think we just saw Tom getting pushed under the bus.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Khadija :D

Edit: This is glorious, they're all so shit.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Jackie fired because her business is too good? Okay.

[Ian]

I know we've said this before but this business plan thing has totally broken the structure or the show. At least one of Khadija and Camilla should have gone. Jackie is a nutter but at least she's performed well a few times.

On the plus side, their effort at the task was one of my all time Apprentice highlights.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

I don't understand how Khadija and Camilla are even there. A cleaning business and some nut milk? Millions there for sure I guess.

[P_3]

Camilla can have my nut milk anytime.

[Ian]

What a useless performance last night. Some proper idiots left in this still. Can't wait wait for them to get slaughtered in the interviews next week. :drool:

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

I loved the advert for it.

Looks like they get a proper roasting.

I'm a little surprised that Camilla didn't go. Sarah Anne fucked up by telling lies and shitting the recipe, however, Camilla has fucked up every branding she's had to do.

[Ian]

Sarah Ann must have had a worse business plan because that's all it really is now.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Worse than nut milk?

That market is saturated to fuck.

[SvN]

The "telling lies" thing was absolute bullshit. They tried to pretend they would've tailored the pitch differently - but how on Earth could they have changed it to remove the element of seduction, given that was the brand name? If she'd have mentioned it, they'd have complained she was being negative about things they couldn't change.

It was a joke of a decision. Camilla was an absolute shambles and would've gone without question in the old format.

[Browning]

Telling a retailer you’re going to spend £100,000 on marketing when you don’t have it should see you fired even if your team wins.

[SvN]

Reminded me of Jim from Northern Ireland a few years ago who said they would have a promotion to tie in with Harry Potter.

[Ian]

Yeah it's hard to tell sometimes when stuff just isn't in the cut but they really didn't get called out on their bullshit about how the feedback would have affected their pitch.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

They'd have adapted and clearly made it work with the high street retailer!

[Ian]

Sugar saying Apprentice might be rescheduled tonight for news coverage if it's officially agreed by some dickheads that Theresa May is, in fact, a useless dickhead.

You don't delay the interviews you fucking tarts.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

For fucks sake.

[Giggles]

Did anything happen or is this on?

[Spikey M]

Depends on the outcome of this special episode of 'You're Fired' with Andrew Neil.

[Ian]

BBC still showing as it being on.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Doesn't look likely.

BBC will be in mourning if she loses and partying if she wins.

[Giggles]

Yeah it's on my EPG, but just heard this Scottish lad saying something about talking to someone at 9 :mad:

[Spikey M]

If she gets voted out, there's no way they leave the coverage. Why watch a few Muppets get sacked when you can watch the Queen of uselessness get fisted?

[Spikey M]

There's a Black Mirror in that.

[Giggles]

Why does she want to hang on anyway? Surely she's enough money made to slip off out of this nightmare and let someone else do it.

[Spikey M]

Why does she want to hang on anyway? Surely she's enough money made to slip off out of this nightmare and let someone else do it.

More over, who the fuck wants to take over?

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Jacob Rees-Mogg.

He'd want it no matter what.

[Spikey M]

I doubt he's thick enough to believe his own bull shit. He'll scurry off like Boris did after 'Leave' won.

[Ian]

Showing as 9.10. Vote failed. Who cares. Move on.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Let's interview some wankers.

And I'm not talking about those in that room.

[Giggles]

We're on.

[Ian]

Let's fucking do this, lads.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

The yoga/dancing session :drool:

[wullie]

Covered in nut juice

[Ian]

:D

[Ian]

Fucking hell I love the interviews.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Camilla and her nut juice are so shit at branding.

[Ian]

Claudine Collins isn't a shameful lustage, right?

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

I love Claude.

[Ian]

Oh Daniel. Top interview moment.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

That nutmilk picture :D

[Ian]

These lot are all shit. Sugar should hire Baggs the Brand posthumously. He was a whole field of ponies. :(

[Ian]

You know what? I admire Khadijah for not crumbling in the face of this because while I love the spectacle it's proper pantomime villainry.

And Claude's look of disgust at "Yoohoo" was perfect.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Daniel :D

[Giggles]

You know what? I admire Khadijah for not crumbling in the face of this because while I love the spectacle it's proper pantomime villainry.

And Claude's look of disgust at "Yoohoo" was perfect.

Yeah she's the only one with a pair at all.

[Giggles]

Actually, scratch that.

What's with them all fucking bawling?

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

I'm saying Daniel and Sian.

I just can't see Camilla rubbing her nut milk all over herself in supermarkets, some tennis tournaments are bollocks and cleaning is shit.

[Ian]

Daniel hasn't had one single moment as good as Sandhurst parasite twat or Solomon but he's had a hilarious set of interviews.

Still think he's got a chance of winning the lot though.

[Browning]

Claudine Collins isn't a shameful lustage, right?

:drool:

She’s the highlight every year.

[Browning]

I’ve only just started, but surely Daniel can’t win if that’s his business.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

I’ve only just started, but surely Daniel can’t win if that’s his business.

I think only Sian has a viable business plan.

I only have him going through because the others are shit.

[Ian]

:drool:

She’s the highlight every year.

This might be the most we've ever agreed. :cool:

[wullie]

I think nut milk could do alright so long as she agrees to take all the porn off the product.

[Ian]

Daniel is definitely going to the final. If he's not winning then he'll be picked as the most entertaining co-finalist alongside Sugar's chosen business plan.

This whole format doesn't make sense with the business plan stuff.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

I don't know why Sian's pricing is a sticking point.

Some university students will blow all of their loans/grants pretty fucking quick, especially on clothes.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Sugar is a pisshead, I'd have thought he'd be all over that.

[Ian]

Camilla making the final. Fucking hell.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Kurran back for the final :drool:

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

btw, is Khadija shameful lustage? :uhoh:

[Ian]

Put it in the thread, with pictures, and find out.

[Giggles]

She'd hardly be that shameful. Considering some of the yokes in that thread anyway.

[Ian]

There have been some absolute horrors in the Apprentice that people have fancied previously so she wouldn't be the worst certainly.

I can't remember her name but there was one somebody on here loved who had a face that could strip paint.

[SvN]

I don't know why Sian's pricing is a sticking point.

Some university students will blow all of their loans/grants pretty fucking quick, especially on clothes.

Yep. I thought the old bastards really showed how out of touch they were with their comments about students being skint.

[P_3]

Final is at 9pm tonight. Don't miss it.

[Ian]

I had entirely forgotten that the final is always a Sunday.

Ugh. Sian is a cow but fucking Camilla had best not win.

[Smjffy]

I'm gutted Daniel got fired because now if Camilla wins it's been a pointless exercise.

You know Sugar probably bullshits his way through and that's why he feared my man Dan.

[Ian]

Camilla's going to fucking win. Ugh.

[Giggles]

No interest in this now. Always an anti climax after the interviews.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Camilla better not win this.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

How was Kurran not picked last?

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Camilla can grab my nuts.

[wullie]

I wasn't interested in this but then Sabrina just walked out.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Kurran getting completely ignored is great.

Sabrina though :drool:

[Giggles]

We need Jasmine in some swimwear.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Wipe your nuts?

Fucking hell.

[wullie]

Kurran's one of the only ones with any sense, which I find a big worry.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

That ginger, woof.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Never praise Kurran.

[Smjffy]

God I hate him.

[Giggles]

Someone's had the lips done.

[Ian]

At least she didn't win.

Worryingly Kurran was the highlight of the episode.

[Browning]

He definitely was. I actually laughed at his “that looks crap” remark at the GIF. Not wetting her hair was ridiculous given the person with £250,000 on the line specified she wanted it.

Hope she’s giving 100k to co-op for marketing those chocolates now.

[SvN]

Kurran was definitely the highlight. That scene where the two idiots were bigging up their shit video and he was just shitting on it was amazing.

Gutted that Sabrina decided to wear a towel during her photoshoot.

[Ian]

I may yet Moar Freds this but for now:

https://www.bbc.co.uk/newsround/47369037

Big Sam. :cool:

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

There are some right shit names in there.

[Browning]

If he was called Allardici he would have been hired already.

[SvN]

I hope Big Sam is as good as I expect.

[Ian]

Tom Allen is going to be the new host of the Apprentice You're Fired.

I quite like him in the very small doses you get on 8 out of 10 Cats does Countdown but I've no idea how it'll be putting up with half an hour of him. I quite liked Rhod Gilbert.

[Giggles]

When I was Googling his name I was really hoping it wasn't going to be "Oh I'm gay don't you know, I haven't mentioned it in 30 seconds". Fuck that.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

I like him in the Professional bake off as well as the panel circuit.