[World Cup 2018] Group G (BEL - ENG - PAN - TUN)

[John]

I said Kane would get a late winner.

You specified the seventy seventh minute, you after eventing nugget.

[Jimmy Floyd]

I'm more worried about what we'll be like when we play a team that isn't fucking garbage.

[Waffdon]

The lack of Tunisia bookings has fucked me

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

You specified the seventy seventh minute, you after eventing nugget.

I'm still taking it, I need this.

[Yevrah]

I'm more worried about what we'll be like when we play a team that isn't fucking garbage.

The only, only thing good that's come out of tonight is that Harry Kane looks like he's fit and up for it. Now just how to create some fucking chances for him.

Also, and I know it's not new, but how the fuck did Southgate arrive at this abomination of a formation?

[Giggles]

Got away with that but it matters fuck all at this stage, win's a win.

[Mellberg]

Most satisfaction I'm getting from this is how gutted the Tunisians are.

[Yevrah]

I'm not normally pleased to see a team lose, but in Tunisia's case I'll make an exception.

Horrible, horrible team.

[Disco]

Sterling and Lingard should be dropped, even if we don't replace them with anyone.

[thommo]

Win's a win.

Tunisia were just as fucking snidey as promised and more. More close ups of the depressed team and fans please.

[Waffdon]

Such a pointless corner Tunisia gave away too. They were walking to a draw.

[Yevrah]

Got away with that but it matters fuck all at this stage, win's a win.

We served up the same shit we have for the last 18 years in tournaments.

And it's starting, "overall a pretty exceptional performance that" says Lineker.

"Won't want to come up against them" says Rio.

Er, ok.

[Disco]

England fans need to go out and smash up some cafes now, I want to see plastic garden chairs flying across the news. Then we've got a World Cup.

[Giggles]

England fans need to go out and smash up some cafes now, I want to see plastic garden chairs flying across the news. Then we've got a World Cup.

I'd say even they know better given where they are.

[Kikó]

Best we've played in decades. In Gary we trust.

[randomlegend]

I honestly think England did well there. Plenty of the top teams have struggled to break down these second-tier teams who set out super-defensively for a draw. We stuck at it and got the win. It's all well and good moaning about it being slow and turgid - and yeah I'm sure Barcelona would dance around Tunisia - but it's really hard to play good football against a team that defensive with the constantly fouling and in the heat.

Trippier was excellent - seemingly the only player left in world football who can take a corner or cross from a free-kick. Alli was clearly injured and should have come off earlier. Sterling was absolutely terrible. Rashford looked lively when he came on and should start the next game.

Also we had two absolutely blatant penalties turned down.

[Yevrah]

I remember the gushing after the Italy game four years ago. We were out six days later.

[John]

That idiot who bought the penalty just openly weeping has made my month. If he's inconsolable after losing the first game, I imagine he'd just immediately end his life if that was the third.

[Giggles]

He might have been in a hectare of space but that really is a perfectly taken header by Kane.

[Kikó]

I remember the gushing after the Italy game four years ago. We were out six days later.

This isn't then.

[Mellberg]

This isn't then.

And we lost.

[Shindig]

Whoever the beeb got to do the highlights of the Sweden game has managed to find me a new favourite voice. He sounds like a toned-down Jonathan Legard.

[Giggles]

After everything that happened late in the season, it would be lol as fuck if they could take Kanes first goal off him for being already over the line.

[Yevrah]

All I'm saying is we weren't very good and we're going to get turned over well before the optimists suggest.

[randomlegend]

I don't think there's exactly been much 'gushing' either. I just think that breaking down those teams is difficult and it's not just us that have struggled. We've done well to ultimately come away with the win.

I think we'll look much better against a team who plays more openly.

[SvN]

I thought Loftus-Cheek looked good when he came on. Much better than Ali, who seemed injured for almost the entire game.

[Pepe]

That kind of opposition will always make you look bad. That defense against anyone half-decent doesn't look too reassuring though.

[thommo]

Whoever the beeb got to do the highlights of the Sweden game has managed to find me a new favourite voice. He sounds like a toned-down Jonathan Legard.

Daniel Mann. I agree, got a good tone for big moments as well. He does a lot of the Championship live games on Sky too.

[Yevrah]

I honestly think England did well there. Plenty of the top teams have struggled to break down these second-tier teams who set out super-defensively for a draw.



I think we'll look much better against a team who plays more openly.

You're just churning out the same stuff that gets said after every shit performance we chuck in in tournaments.

[Pepe]

Everyone looks better against more open opponents, until they put three past you.

[Yevrah]

I thought Loftus-Cheek looked good when he came on. Much better than Ali, who seemed injured for almost the entire game.

Alli was wank and is a jumped up twat so I wouldn't be too fussed if we didn't start him. Sterling is a real problem and Lingard was bollocks too.

[Jimmy Floyd]

That was mild antics from Tunisia to be honest. Game 3 of a group stage is where they really come alive.

[Alan Shearer The 2nd]

With this VAR stuff how on earth did you lot not get two penalties for Kane getting pulled to the ground?

[Kikó]

Lingard was unlucky to not score a brace. Poor second half but not bollocks.

[Yevrah]

With this VAR stuff how on earth did you lot not get two penalties for Kane getting pulled to the ground?

When should it actually be used? All of the time or just selectively? If selectively, when?

Serious and genuine question that, I'd quite like to know.

[Giggles]

With this VAR stuff how on earth did you lot not get two penalties for Kane getting pulled to the ground?

It really is ridiculous and makes it completely pointless.

[randomlegend]

Yev you're just determined to be relentlessly negative. You'd have found things to whinge about if we'd won 8-0.

[Giggles]

Lingard was unlucky to not score a brace. Poor second half but not bollocks.

He should be sent home after that shit show, let alone dropped.

[Yevrah]

Lingard was unlucky to not score a brace. Poor second half but not bollocks.

Unlucky? Take your Man Utd goggles off and have a look how he struck the ball for the first chance. It wasn't unlucky, just shit.

[randomlegend]

When should it actually be used? All of the time or just selectively? If selectively, when?

Serious and genuine question that, I'd quite like to know.

Apparently they have people constantly watching and they alert the ref if they feel there is something he should review.

He was alerted on the first one on Kane and looked at it but didn't give it.

[Lewis]

lol the Arab teams have lost every game.

[randomlegend]

Unlucky? Take your Man Utd goggles off and have a look how he struck the ball for the first chance. It wasn't unlucky, just shit.

The one that was deflected?

[Kikó]

Unlucky? Take your Man Utd goggles off and have a look how he struck the ball for the first chance. It wasn't unlucky, just shit.

He's getting in the right place and unlucky not to bag. Cheer up you miserable cunt.

[Alan Shearer The 2nd]

When should it actually be used? All of the time or just selectively? If selectively, when?

Serious and genuine question that, I'd quite like to know.

That I don't know but even ignoring VAR surely one of the officials will have seen him getting pulled to the ground?

[Yevrah]

Yev you're just determined to be relentlessly negative. You'd have found things to whinge about if we'd won 8-0.

Well I wouldn't, as those on this board since I joined in the early 00's will attest to.

The problem is I've seen so much England that I can smell an impending bad tournament performance from us a mile off. The only thing I saw today that makes me think anything other than that was Kane looking sharp, which is a serious positive.

[Yevrah]

The one that was deflected?

The one after two minutes.

[randomlegend]

I've been here since about 2003 and all you've ever done is moan.

[randomlegend]

The one after two minutes.

Oh yeah that one was terrible.

[John]

When should it actually be used? All of the time or just selectively? If selectively, when?

Serious and genuine question that, I'd quite like to know.

The way it seems to have worked so far is that the people in the booth are reviewing everything at all times but they only contact the ref if he gets something important egregiously wrong. So far that's largely been about awarding penalties, but that Kane non decision renders the whole system pointless.

[Jimmy Floyd]

lol the Arab teams have lost every game.

And they will at every tournament until we find a way to stop them qualifying.

[-james-]

I said before the tournament that their results against Tunisia and Panama wouldn't be much use when judging England as a team. Every team in the tournament has had great trouble breaking down deep blocks like the one Tunisia employed in the second half.

It's worth looking at how the favourites have performed in the first round:

Brazil - creating next to nothing against Switzerland, drew 1-1
Germany - Were much worse than Mexico, could have lost by a few
France - Scored via a penalty and a long range fluke. Were lucky to win against Australia, created absolutely nothing.
Spain - Were good against Portugal. The best side in the tournament
Argentina - Created absolutely nothing against Iceland, didn't deserve to win
Belgium - Played the worst side in the tournament, had very little cohesion & relied on individual magic

England - Created more chances than any of the sides above in the first half. Conceded no chances all game, gave away a questionable penalty. Should have won about 3-0.

[Mellberg]

Harry Kane has more World Cup goals than Wayne Rooney.

[Pepe]

The fuck is Panama the worst side in the tournament.

[Giggles]

I said before the tournament that their results against Tunisia and Panama wouldn't be much use when judging England as a team. Every team in the tournament has had great trouble breaking down deep blocks like the one Tunisia employed in the second half.

It's worth looking at how the favourites have performed in the first round:

Brazil - creating next to nothing against Switzerland, drew 1-1
Germany - Were much worse than Mexico, could have lost by a few
France - Scored via a penalty and a long range fluke. Were lucky to win against Australia, created absolutely nothing.
Spain - Were good against Portugal. The best side in the tournament
Argentina - Created absolutely nothing against Iceland, didn't deserve to win
Belgium - Played the worst side in the tournament, had very little cohesion & relied on individual magic

England - Created more chances than any of the sides above in the first half. Conceded no chances all game, gave away a questionable penalty. Should have won about 3-0.

Not including European champions Portugal in your list?

Your still absolutely delusional anyway. Politician.

[Jimmy Floyd]

The main positives are a) that Kane is good and b) Southgate is loving it. I think we'll make the last eight but against a proper side our defence will cave in.

[-james-]

Not including European champions Portugal in your list?

Portugal are terrible, just as they were 2 years ago. Their goals were a defensive error leading to a penalty, a David De Gea error, and a once in 45 direct free kick. They won't reach the last 8.

[Yevrah]

Portugal are terrible, just as they were 2 years ago. Their goals were a defensive error leading to a penalty, a David De Gea error, and a once in 45 direct free kick. They won't reach the last 8.

If we played them who do you think would win?

[-james-]

If we played them who do you think would win?

I'd be with England. Morocco will cause them trouble on Wednesday.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Portugal are terrible, just as they were 2 years ago. Their goals were a defensive error leading to a penalty, a David De Gea error, and a once in 45 direct free kick. They won't reach the last 8.

You're still looking at sport as though we're playing over a 1000 game simulation. We're not, it's a 7 game tournament in which intangibles become more valuable than tangibles.

[Yevrah]

It's worth looking at how the favourites have performed in the first round:

Brazil - creating next to nothing against Switzerland, drew 1-1
Germany - Were much worse than Mexico, could have lost by a few
France - Scored via a penalty and a long range fluke. Were lucky to win against Australia, created absolutely nothing.
Spain - Were good against Portugal. The best side in the tournament
Argentina - Created absolutely nothing against Iceland, didn't deserve to win
Belgium - Played the worst side in the tournament, had very little cohesion & relied on individual magic

England - Created more chances than any of the sides above in the first half. Conceded no chances all game, gave away a questionable penalty. Should have won about 3-0.

But it's not worth it though, because that's another thing we do every time and with the possible exception of Belgium, I guarantee you that any one and all of those teams knock us out if we come up against them.

[-james-]

You're still looking at sport as though we're playing over a 1000 game simulation. We're not, it's a 7 game tournament in which intangibles become more valuable than tangibles.

The fact that it's a seven game tournament is exactly how that Portugal side can win a tournament. They are rank.

[Yevrah]

I'd be with England. Morocco will cause them trouble on Wednesday.

Well then you've run mad.

Not a chance in this world or the next that we'd knock Portugal out.

[Yevrah]

The fact that it's a seven game tournament is exactly how that Portugal side can win a tournament. They are rank.

They're not very good to watch, I'll give you that, but they're organised as fuck and have the best player in the world on a personal mission to cement that as best player ever. They'd properly turn us over.

EDIT: And by that I don't mean we'd lose 8-0, but we wouldn't beat them and we'd never really look like doing so.

[-james-]

He was awful at euro 2016 and didn't play in the final. In the first game here he has scored 3 improbable goals. It's all narrative.

[Boom-Boom-18]

He was awful at euro 2016 and didn't play in the final. In the first game here he has scored 3 improbable goals. It's all narrative.

He had two man of the matches, including the semi final in which he scored and bagged an assist.

3 goals and 3 assists. He was not awful.

[Disco]

Yeah he's rubbish, he only scores improbable goals multiple times a match.

[Reg]

Every team in the tournament has had great trouble breaking down deep blocks like the one Tunisia employed in the second half.
Yep. Teams that are good at it are club sides and Spain 2008-2012 (near enough a club side). Obviously there will be times teams manage it better than we did tonight, but it's not easy.

We definitely had a poor spell in the second half. And we looked extremely nervy following the Tunisia goal. It will be interesting to see how the nerves hold up if/when we get through.

Lots of our players are better when they have space to break into, particularly Lingard and Sterling. Lingard's not suited to those types of games; I think Loftus-Cheek would be a better choice v Panama.

[-james-]

He had two man of the matches, including the semi final in which he scored and bagged an assist.

3 goals and 3 assists. He was not awful.

The header against Wales was good, but it's a bit lol to call the second goal an assist. The only good side they beat was Croatia, and I don't think he did anything all game. He certainly didn't carry them to victory.

[-james-]

Yeah he's rubbish, he only scores improbable goals multiple times a match.

He's obviously an amazing asset to have, but I don't think relying on him like they have is sustainable. They nearly didn't qualify from their Euro 2016 group (featuring Hungary, Iceland and Austria) because he kept on lobbing free kicks 10 yards over.

[Disco]

He's obviously an amazing asset to have, but I don't think relying on him like they have is sustainable. They nearly didn't qualify from their Euro 2016 group (featuring Hungary, Iceland and Austria) because he kept on lobbing free kicks 10 yards over.

They won that tournament, how much more sustainable do you want?

[-james-]

They won that tournament, how much more sustainable do you want?

They won the tournament, but they weren't the best side in the tournament.

I'm talking about how good I think teams are, because that's how you try and work out how they might do in the future, and I don't think Portugal are very good.

I don't think recent finalists, France and Argentina, are very good either, for the record.

[Lewis]

This is like when I tried rationalising Leicester. Go on lad.

[Jimmy Floyd]

It doesn't matter who's good, it matters who wins.

[Cheddar]

I can never seem to get behind England in tournament or anything else, I just donÂ’t seem interested. IÂ’ll watch them but I couldnÂ’t really care if we go out or not.

[Disco]

They won the tournament, but they weren't the best side in the tournament.

:D Fuck off

[-james-]

:D Fuck off

Spain, Germany or Italy would all have beaten them in the final. Tournament football is weird and unpredictable.

[-james-]

It doesn't matter who's good, it matters who wins.

All I'm doing is saying who I think might win.

[Pepe]

Worse than a Harold thread, this.

[Reg]

Dino's point is perfectly understandable. They're cup competitions. Wigan won the FA Cup, doesn't mean they were the best team in it.

Although I'd say Portugal were good. And relying on one player is perhaps usually unsustainable, but it's Ronaldo. They could win it, I think.

[Waffdon]

Eden Hazard is the best player at the tournament.

I gotchu, James x

[Jimmy Floyd]

Winning often comes about as a result of qualities other than being good. Being mentally resilient, for example.

[Bam]

When someone like Yev talks about football I fall asleep. The guy has no idea Dino.

[Giggles]

When someone like Yev talks about football I fall asleep. The guy has no idea Dino.

Dino's gone to sleep it off.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Well this game has spawned an Alan Shearer/Simon Schama twitter spat, and for that it will go down as one of the classics.

[Lewis]

Alan Shearer seems like the most likely leave voter of the England pundits.

[mugbull]

The Tunisian Ben Youssef has got to belong to some local tribe with weird isolated genes. Dude's an actual redhead.

[phonics]

I was at the fanzone where I was sat in front of four blokes who only referred to each other as 'big lad' at the beginning and end of every sentence. That was between bellowing out some chant to the tune of 'one of our own' but about drinking pints. It was beyond parody.

During the anthems, they absolutely belted the first three lines of God Save the Queen before remembering they knew as much as the players.

[Panda Bear]

The Tunisian Ben Youssef has got to belong to some local tribe with weird isolated genes. Dude's an actual redhead.

Just the opposite, actually. The Silk Road introduced a whole bunch of genes that are still floating about.

[mugbull]

Just the opposite, actually. The Silk Road introduced a whole bunch of genes that are still floating about.

Yeah, I doubt anybody in Tunisia developed the gene on their own, but they've got to be interbreeding the redheads they've got given how recessive that trait is.

[Browning]

Pretty much their entire squad was born in France anyway.

[mugbull]

He was born in Tunis

[ItalAussie]

And they will at every tournament until we find a way to stop them qualifying.

I reckon they're one bad World Cup cycle away from splitting AFC qualification geographically. They do it in the AFC Champion's League, to ensure that one of the oil teams makes it the final.

[Byron]

Eden Hazard is the best player at the tournament.



I reckon, if you really work you might be able to fit his whole cock in your mouth.

[Waffdon]

I reckon, if you really work you might be able to fit his whole cock in your mouth.

I was taking the piss to take the heat off James, mate. Regardless, my gag reflex is elite.

[SincereTheRebel]

Regardless, my gag reflex is elite.

https://media.tenor.com/images/aaebb954ed50e086912a68a864557e7d/tenor.gif

[Mazuuurk]

Winning often comes about as a result of qualities other than being good. Being mentally resilient, for example.


Are you suggesting having a good leader for a captain matters here? :eyemouth:

[Panda Bear]

The most important intangible in the entire world across all fields is luck.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Team has been leaked apparently.

Alli out with an injury will be replaced by Loftus-Cheek and Sterling will make way for Rashford.

Seems logical if true.

[Lewis]

Yep. Rest Sterling for the decider.

[Bob Sacamano]

Drogba with the Marko Marin disprespect ha.

[Boom-Boom-18]

A Tunisia win today would spice the group up a little.

[Magic]

Belgium will win.

[Magic]

Lol at Witsel and Carrasco playing in China.

[Shindig]

Belgium's movement's going to be tough for us to contain. They could do well in this.

[Serj]

Tunisia look terrible.

[Max Power]

Could be an absolute shellacking here. Tunisia wise open again and Belgium are taking their chances where we didn’t. Also prime candidates for a red card or two.

Hopefully my golden boot pick Lukaku racks em up

[niko_cee]

Tunisia are terrible. Did you not watch the first 25 minutes or whatever it was of the England game?

[Browning]

Hopefully Belgium smash the cunts. I couldn't care less about winning the group. Coming 2nd may be better for us at this rate.

[Browning]

That was class from Lukaku. Shame such a thoroughly likeable player has to play for Man U.

[Serj]

Tunisia are terrible. Did you not watch the first 25 minutes or whatever it was of the England game?

I only saw parts of that. Somehow I had it in my head that they were the best organised of the North African sides. Instead their main skill seems to be giving the ball away.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

That was a tidy finish.

[SvN]

Lukaku in this sort of form is so good. If he can sort his consistency out he's going to be incredible for us.

[Magic]

Hopefully he dies on the pitch.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Wtf is this song thing?

:cab:

[Disco]

If Roberto Martinez wins the World Cup will Yev have to commit seppuku?

[Shindig]

Well, if Frank reckons we can hold this lot, I'm sold.

[Trancemeister]

Batshuayi :cool:

[Giggles]

Batshuayi :cool:

Only took him the 2 or 3 clear cut chances.

[Bob Sacamano]

Phil seething with Khazri scoring after slagging him the whole game.

[Browning]

Phil is easily the worst commentator at the whole tournament.

[Disco]

At one point he said the Hazard wasn't captain material (returning only a 3% bump to inspiration) then said he thrived on the responsibility.

[Shindig]

Yeah, I wonder if being a manager has now inflated his head a little more.

[Browning]

I liked his point that the late Tunisia goal would give England hope. Yep, I'm fully convinced that if Belgium are 4 goals up, we'll be able to carve up a sitter for Sterling to miss.

[Shindig]

Yup. Because defending at 5-1 is the same as defending at 0-0, Phil.

[Yevrah]

If Roberto Martinez wins the World Cup will Yev have to commit seppuku?

It's very likely that I'll have to, yes.

[mugbull]

It’s just a shame that Belgium will eventually capitulate to one of the top teams

[Shindig]

It's very likely that I'll have to, yes.

Man self-impaled by broom. Full story at 10pm.

[Giggles]

Man self-impaled by broom. Full story at 10pm.

:D

[ItalAussie]

Hopefully Belgium smash the cunts. I couldn't care less about winning the group. Coming 2nd may be better for us at this rate.

Winner likely gets a QF against Brazil, which is a pretty rubbish outcome.

[Jimmy Floyd]

We would do well to win 1-0 tomorrow and then play the reserves vs Belgium.

[Boom-Boom-18]

The best result for England is going to be a convincing win vs Panama (but not enough to over turn the goal difference in our favour) and then a draw vs Belgium with reserves playing.

The route to the semi finals looks as good as you could hope for (for whoever finished second).

[niko_cee]

It’s just a shame that Belgium will eventually capitulate to one of the top teams

Or Wales.

[Yevrah]

Playing the reserves. :sick:

[Browning]

Why would we not play the reserves in a game where losing is the best outcome for us?

[Shindig]

I'd only put a decent squad out if smash nine past Panama and hold out on goal difference.

[Yevrah]

Why would we not play the reserves in a game where losing is the best outcome for us?

Because the whole concept of doing it in a 7 game tournament is absolute balls.

It kills any momentum a team might have. Particularly if said team is England and we take an age to get going.

[niko_cee]

There's a difference between putting the reserves out, and resting some of the more important players. I wouldn't advocate Kane not playing, but the wingbacks probably need a rest at some point and if that's not today then Belgium would be a time to do it. I would agree that making 11 changes, losing to Belgium and then getting bunted by whoever in the last 16 would be a bad outcome - but winning against Belgium might be just as bad depending on how the draw goes.

[Giggles]

The way this world cup is going you still wouldn't know what way things would work out so I'd be going for keeping winning and let the chips fall as they may.
Looking at most of the supposed contenders there is absolutely nothing for England to fear playing any of them.

[Spikey M]

I can’t wait for us to lose to Panama so this is all irrelevant. :drool:

[Ian]

Because the whole concept of doing it in a 7 game tournament is absolute balls.

It kills any momentum a team might have. Particularly if said team is England and we take an age to get going.

And further to your point if said team is England who haven't remotely earned the right to be trying to game anything.

For today (assuming Southgate isn't changing the system) I'd probablybe aiming to start Kane and then if we build up a healthy lead and he's scored get Vardy on, maybe rest Young for Rose and start Loftus-Cheek. With big gaps you don't need wholesale resting to be the driver for changing your team so much as "who else do we want to give some minutes?" vs. "how much do we want to dick about with the team?"

[niko_cee]

The beeb having Sterling starting.

[Browning]

Assuming we win today we will have earned the right. Obviously they aren’t two tough teams but we have qualified with a game to spare so we can do what we want in the last game.

By the time it happens we will also know where all the chips have fallen.

If winning means a quarter final against the winner of Brazil/Germany then fuck that.

[Giggles]

Assuming we win today we will have earned the right. Obviously they aren’t two tough teams but we have qualified with a game to spare so we can do what we want in the last game.

By the time it happens we will also know where all the chips have fallen.

If winning means a quarter final against the winner of Brazil/Germany then fuck that.

If there's confidence at all then one or both could have to be played anyway, so might as well be round 2 or QF. Would Germany or Brazil really scare England the way they look at the moment anyway?

[Browning]

Maybe not, but there is no sense in forcing a situation where we face the big guns earlier than necessary. Getting to the semis facing “lesser” sides and then facing two top teams is obviously preferable to facing three top sides.

[Reg]

Talking about deliberately drawing/losing (if that's what's happening) is a bit mad, I think. And if Brazil/whoever finish 2nd in their group, there's a reason for that. So why should we fear them more than the team who finishes 1st?

[Browning]

It’s all rather irrelevant because assuming Belgium don’t throw the game, we aren’t beating them.

[Magic]

I love how sky pretend football isn't on when international tournaments are on. Fuck them.

[-james-]

Talking about deliberately drawing/losing (if that's what's happening) is a bit mad, I think. And if Brazil/whoever finish 2nd in their group, there's a reason for that. So why should we fear them more than the team who finishes 1st?

Surely you're not suggesting you would prefer to face Brazil over Switzerland?

[Reg]

Depends on what happens. If Serbia hammer Brazil and Switzerland do the same to Costa Rica, then yeah, why not. Not that I think that's likely.

[Browning]

If that happens, Brazil are out.

[Yevrah]

Heat as an excuse getting in early.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Brazil would have to draw with Serbia to finish 2nd, although I wouldn't put it past them, either on merit or them gaming it.

[Jimmy Floyd]

The way this world cup is going you still wouldn't know what way things would work out so I'd be going for keeping winning and let the chips fall as they may.
Looking at most of the supposed contenders there is absolutely nothing for England to fear playing any of them.

In most cases I'd agree but we have a massive psychological issue playing Germany in competitive football.

[Mike]

Rio Ferdinand with a fat joke in the build up. Good old England.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Panama are the sort of team that should have a comedy Dwayne Leverock type character in there somewhere, but I think they are actually just a bunch of ageing shitkickers.

[Pleb]

We'll shit out a 1-0.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

This formation is a beauty for trying to break down a team that will be defending for their lives.

[Shindig]

It's the kind of opposition Crouch would get four against.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Feigning injury should be a straight red. That Panamanian didn't get hit in the head but claimed a head injury.

[Dan]

LOL fuck Panama

They really ought to start giving penalties for every hold.

[Jimmy Floyd]

I actually hope we win about 10-0 after these first few minutes. Panama a despicable team.

Should have tried wrestling Stones shouldn't you you fucking wankers.

[Pleb]

That free header :D

[Dan]

That free header :D

Every Panama defender was busy holding someone else. They’re going to be lucky to finish with nine men if they keep this up.

[Waffdon]

England better not hold off here. Get your golden boot, Harry

[Baz]

Stones and Maguire to each score a header @ 350/1

:drool:

[Disco]

The holding is hilarious, is it just the British that look at it and wonder why it goes unpunished?

[Waffdon]

England’s passing has been horrific so far.

[randomlegend]

That clearance from Walker was incredible. Getting that much power on it in that direction defies physics.

[Yevrah]

That clearance from Walker was incredible. Getting that much power on it in that direction defies physics.

I like Gareth and I'd love him to do well, but playing Kyle Walker at centre back is up there with any of the batshit ideas any England manager has ever had.

[Yevrah]

Panama are so bad.

[Dan]

Credit to Panama, they've managed to make me root for England for the first time in ages.

Gotta get at least five here.

[Yevrah]

What a penalty. Resting him for the third game when he's looking this clinical would be madness.

[Jimmy Floyd]

I don't think I've ever seen a bigger bunch of shitheads than this.

[Waffdon]

I don’t normally mind shithousing tactics, but these lot are a right deranged bunch. Gwan, Harry.

[John Arne]

Panama get away with all that shit, then Loftus-Cheek gets booked for nothing.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Panama get away with all that shit, then Loftus-Cheek gets booked for nothing.

Egyptian ref. That said, we are being very naive putting feet in when it just isn't needed. We should stand off and let them have it, they are shit.

[Dan]

Get Lingard off, he's been rubbish when he's not been getting assaulted.

[Browning]

No idea why they are targeting Lingard. They should just ignore him completely.

Edit- not sure which team that applies to most.

[Yevrah]

Perhaps the biggest lol is that they've probably passed the ball better than we have so far.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Perhaps the biggest lol is that they've probably passed the ball better than we have so far.

And that both our goals have come as a direct result of their shittery.

[Jimmy Floyd]

We've looked pretty piss poor but whatever.

Hard to play like Brazil 1970 when you're just going to get kicked.

[Yevrah]

Lovely stuff.

Genuinely good all round that.

[Waffdon]

Does he only score great goals?

[Dan]

Get Lingard off, he's been rubbish when he's not been getting assaulted.

Alright, now you can take him off.

[Pleb]

Lingard you fucking cunt :cool:

[Dan]

How long before Panama just start shredding everyone up (again)?

I'd get Kane off at half-time just to be safe.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Messi Lingard :drool:

That's a glorious finish.

[Yevrah]

I'd get Kane off at half-time just to be safe.

:sick:

[Dan]

Credit to Panama, they've managed to make me root for England for the first time in ages.

Gotta get at least five here.

Might get there by half-time :drool:

[Waffdon]

Sterling loves to miss a sitter.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

How did they qualify?

[John Arne]

Arse. My stream went down and I missed that.

[Yevrah]

How has Sterling missed that?

[Dan]

This is like one of those FM games where you set the team to attacking & actually pick the right team talk.

EDIT: This is fucking stupid :D

[Trancemeister]

This is just embarrising.

[Yevrah]

This is the worst team I've ever seen us play in a World Cup.

[Max Power]

Let Stones take it

[Trancemeister]

Why not let Stones take it. Game over anyway.

[John Arne]

Panama imploding :)

[Yevrah]

Honestly, the lad is on fucking fire.

If he's brought off early it'll be a travesty, he could seal the golden boot here.

[Dan]

Might get there by half-time :drool:

Double figures?

[Pleb]

One more goal and we're going top lads :drool:

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Absolutely rotten.

[Max Power]

Obviously Panama aren’t much cop but this is England at a World Cup and it’s so refreshing to see us comprehensively doing the job.

Just need a Vardy/Maguire goal please

[Yevrah]

One more goal and we're going top lads :drool:

If we actually string some passes together and don't turn the second half into a training ground exercise with substitutions galore we could genuinely hit 10.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Those penalties were properly Shearer-esque.

Panama the worst and nastiest 45 minutes I've ever seen at a World Cup I think. Biggest cheer of their day would be number 5 or 6 getting sent off.

[elth]

I'm usually pretty pro England humiliating themselves but Panama have been so fucking cunty I hope you absolutely thrash them. Absolutely disgraceful.

[Yevrah]

Those penalties were properly Shearer-esque.

I was thinking exactly that. They might have actually been better. Either way, genuinely unsaveable.

[Yevrah]

Those penalties were properly Shearer-esque.

I was thinking exactly that. They might have actually been better. Either way, genuinely unsaveable.

[Shindig]

Loving this. It wasn't that long ago we were struggling to beat Andorra.

[Jimmy Floyd]

If anything they'll probably get even worse trying to shit their way to avoiding a cricket score.

[randomlegend]

Have a bit of this Yev you grizzled old scrotum of a man.

[Waffdon]

USA finished below this lot with Panama scoring 9 goals and conceding 10 Hahahahahhaahha

[John]

:sick:

I'd give him ten minutes to get his hat trick, but Panama will clearly spend the second half just kicking anyone near them, so I'd get Kane off before some window cleaner breaks his ankle.

[Jimmy Floyd]

I'd keep him on and rest others, or those likely to get drawn into the shitfest (Loftus-Cheek).

[Mike]

Has Kyle Walker made a tackle? I need him to make two in the match for a bet to come in.

[Ian]

Milliner, surely? John

Panama must be the most detestable underdogs I've ever seen.

[Amigo]

Hard to believe Panama were in the same pot as Nigeria in the group draw.

In fact, it's hard to believe they qualified to begin with.

[Lewis]

Maybe we're just class.

[SincereTheRebel]

Maybe we're just class.

World Class. Minimum semi-finals for England,

[Yevrah]

Have a bit of this Yev you grizzled old scrotum of a man.

:D

I'm enjoying it.

[John]

I'd keep him on and rest others, or those likely to get drawn into the shitfest (Loftus-Cheek).

Vardy will wallop this mob every bit as much as Kane will but you'll need Kane later against a proper defence. No point leaving him out there against a load of hacking bastards when the game's already won.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Hard to believe Panama were in the same pot as Nigeria in the group draw.

In fact, it's hard to believe they qualified to begin with.

I've just studied the qualification table, they got a point out of Mexico, won in Honduras (no one wins in Honduras), and got 4 points out of Costa Rica. Really is hard to see how.

[Giggles]

This is the worst team I've ever seen us play in a World Cup.

Did the USA fail to qualify ahead of this lot? Did they send out the Paralympic team or something?

[Jimmy Floyd]

USA beat them 4-0 in the second to last game. CONCACAF qualification is harder than it looks due to having to play away in all these drug ridden shitholes where you get bags of piss and other projectiles launched at you for the full 90 minutes, but it's amazing that they came 5th.

[Yevrah]

Is that Kane's goal?

Either way, nice we've finally created a chance for him in open play.

[SvN]

What a finish.

[SvN]

Is that Kane's goal?

Either way, nice we've finally created a chance for him in open play.

Who else's would it be?

[Boydy]

No, don't take Kane off, you wankers. I bet on him to score 4 or more just before he got his third, ffs.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

That's offside but that's crazy lucky.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Okay, mental goal mind.

[SvN]

That's offside but that's crazy lucky.
He was level

[Yevrah]

Who else's would it be?

Whoever actually shot. It was just assumed it was going miles wide by the commentary team, but I saw no replay confirming it.

[Jimmy Floyd]

It wasn't offside, Panama defender had a boot behind him.

Last time I can recall England scoring 6 against non-microstate opposition was against Jamaica in a warm-up friendly for 2006.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Yeah I didn't see the Panama heel dragging.

[SvN]

Whoever actually shot. It was just assumed it was going miles wide by the commentary team, but I saw no replay confirming it.

Whoever it touches last gets the goal. That's been the rule forever, unless you're talking about deflections from the opposing team.

[randomlegend]

Whenever they show the Panama manager he's smiling away and looks like the most affable chap you could hope to meet.

It's bizarre when you see what a bunch of cheating, caniving shitheads his players are.

[Jimmy Floyd]

I really do worry about our back three. Anyone with a creative approach should carve through them at will.

[randomlegend]

Yeah we are definitely prone to some shaky moments at the back.

[Magic]

Whenever they show the Panama manager he's smiling away and looks like the most affable chap you could hope to meet.

It's bizarre when you see what a bunch of cheating, caniving shitheads his players are.

He looks like a trannie.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

That was coming.

The defence is a proper joke.

[Yevrah]

I really do worry about our back three. Anyone with a creative approach should carve through them at will.

I know it seems bizarre to say this, but two games in and I'm still no wiser as to how good we are.

[elth]

Panama have, to be fair to them, largely turned off shitehawk mode in the second half.

[randomlegend]

They didn't have much choice. It would have ended about 12-0 with 8 from penalties and they'd have had about 7 players left on the pitch.

[Jimmy Floyd]

I know it seems bizarre to say this, but two games in and I'm still no wiser as to how good we are.

All we've done so far is edge past one nasty underdog and smashed another. We've been quite lazy and careless in this game so the Belgium one will be interesting to see how we go against a proper side.

Being a Martinez side there will be 2-3 goals on the table if we want them.

[elth]

Isn't it shaping up that one half of the knockout draw is so much easier than the other that both you and Belgium are going to try to lose the last game anyway?

[John]

I reckon Belgium will biff England in the group, but if they somehow met in the knockouts I'd fancy England to win that. Belgium are one of the few sides with proper players I'd have as bigger bottlers than England.

[-james-]

Yes, England have a greater chance of winning the cup by winning 6-1 or indeed 1-0 than if they had won 6-0.

[Jimmy Floyd]

As it stands, I think a draw between us and Belgium would see it go to fair play (I think currently 3 Belgium bookings to our 2).

So if all else fails we could kick our way to second place.

[elth]

Pretty touches going around in circles and then a long back pass basically sums up the second half.