[FOOTBALL] Weekend Fixtures feat. League Cup Final & Man United v Chelsea (24/25 Feb)

[Reg]

http://www.live-footballontv.com for more live.

Friday
Livingston v Dundee United - 19:35 BBC ALBA
Hull v Sheffield United - 19:45 Sky

Saturday
Leicester v Stoke - 12:30 Sky
Bournemouth v Newcastle
Brighton v Swansea
Burnley v Southampton
Liverpool v West Ham
West Brom v Huddersfield
Watford v Everton - 17:30 BT

Fulham v Wolves - 17:30 Sky
Barcelona v Girona - 19:45 Sky
Inter v Benevento- 19:45 BT

Sunday
Crystal Palace v Tottenham - 12:00 Sky
Man United v Chelsea - 14:05 Sky

Arsenal v Man City (League Cup Final) - 16:30 Sky

Aberdeen v Celtic - 13:30 Sky
Juventus v Atalanta - 17:00 BT
Valencia v Real Sociedad - 17:30 Sky
Sevilla v Atletico Madrid - 19:45 Sky
Roma v Milan - 19:45 BT
PSG v Marseille - 20:00 BT

Monday
Cagliari v Napoli - 19:45 BT

Note: Arsenal v Man City (league) was due to be played this weekend so will instead be played on Thursday (Sky). I'll do a midweek thread for that and other games like the FA Cup replays.

[Kikó]

Big game tonight for Dundee United v second place Livingston. They've been shit since they've lost a few players for injury over Christmas.

[phonics]

Europa League Draw:

Lazio v Dynamo Kiev
RB Leipzig v Zenit St Petersburg
Atletico Madrid v Lokomotiv Moscow
CSKA v Lyon
Marseille v Athletic Bilbao
Sporting Lisbon v Viktoria Plzen
Borussia Dortmund v FC Salzburg
Milan v Arsenal

It was them or Dortmund and I'd definitely prefer Milan.

[Mazuuurk]

Isn't the draw random?

[phonics]

You can only draw certain teams. We couldn't play Salzburg for some reason IIRC. So it was Dortmund or Milan.

[Adramelch]

Isn't the draw random?

I am assuming he was talking at that specific point as it was only Dortmund, Milan, Salzburg and Arsenal left. Still, I don't see a valid reason why Arsenal couldn't be paired with Salzburg? As far as I can tell the only restriction was Russian vs Ukrainian teams.

[CJay]

Bear in mind how often Phonics is completely wrong.

[Waffdon]

Big game tonight for Dundee United v second place Livingston. They've been shit since they've lost a few players for injury over Christmas.


Tasty odds on Livingston.

[phonics]

Pochettino said that Dembele is on the same level as Maradona in his presser today...

They've surpassed the Busby Babes, we're now at 'Top 5 players of all time' level.

[Mazuuurk]

Which Dembele? The Spurs one :harold:


(no Dembele is, but still)

[phonics]

Must admit, I'm a little confused as to why Pep has been charged for wearing his Catalan Independence ribbon months after he started wearing it and weeks and weeks after Mourinho said 'I would be banned for this'.

It seems odd timing, I know the yellow ribbon also represents a form of cancer (Leukemia?) so maybe there's a sponsor/charity issue?

P.S. I just worked out the Luke Emia joke. I thought it was a reference to some player or something.

[Baz]

This record (https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Manchester_United_F.C._9–0_Ipswich_Town_F.C.) could well be beaten today.

[phonics]

Nah, that's not the same West Ham team you saw at the beginning of the season.

[Spikey M]

Dembele (when he bothers, which he frequently doesn’t) is a monster. There is no getting the ball off of him. That works well as it gives the others around him the chance to get forward without worrying about him losing possession. The only problem with him, aside from his inconsistency, is that he lacks the vision to find a killer pass and he flat out refuses to shoot, which, considering he started out as a striker is weird.

[Max Power]

Amazing pre match thread on a Watford Forum ahead of the game with Everton :D

http://wfcforums.com/index.php?threads/watford-fc-v-everton-24-02-18.54213/

As the hornets return to action after a fortnight off, it's a 17:30 kick off for this game and it'll be live on BT Sport.

Everton's Celebrity Fans

Smoothtalkin’ radio DJ Tony Blackburn, dead ‘bomb ‘em all’ Tory Kenny Everett, pretend socialist turned property speculating mogul Derek Hatton, ski jump failure Eddie Edwards and of course paedophile toddler murderer Jon Venables are just a few amongst the star-spangled pantheon of the nation’s finest who support the Toffeeman.


Blues & White Supremacy

And it’s not just the celebrity fans who are rubbishy dinosaurs from a different era. Everton Football Club are famously racist and proudly refused to recruit any black players during the entire 1960s, 1970s, 1980s and early 1990s.

“Keep Everton White!” chanted their banana flinging fans, whilst their board members proudly declared that Everton represented "the last bastion of Englishness’ in Division One". So it’s no surprise that the only leagues The Toffees can claim to regularly dominate these days are the league tables of worst racist attitudes and most outrageous homophobia amongst English football fans. https://www.theguardian.com/uk/2000/jan/07/race.world “Fans from Everton, Rangers and Celtic topped the league table for making the largest number of racist comments heard, the survey found”.

Listen out for examples of the famous Evertonian white supremacist wit in comments such as “f****** black monkey!” and “Take down that chink!” http://www.kickitout.org/news/everton-fan-found-guilty-of-racist-abuse/#.WoGR7f5LEjQ

Ruud Gullit reports that when playing at Everton “the day’s epithets, from fans of all ages, included:“Get off the pitch, ya f**kin’ ********!”, “F**k off the pitch, ya f**kin’ n****r!”, “F**k off, ya black c**t!”, “F**kin’ cheatin’ divin’ black c**t!”, “*******!”, “********!” and “N****r!”

Les Ferdinand notes “When we played at Goodison on the opening day of the 1996/97 season, I picked up an injury and needed treatment on the perimeter track. As I sat by the touchline, dads in the stand were hurling all kinds of abuse at me, much of it racist, as their sons sat beside them. Those kids will think it is perfectly normal to carry on like that.”

In December 2001, Fulham defender Rufus Brevitt and winger Luis Boa Morte was on the receiving end of racism, being victimised by monkey noises and racist chants such as “Get back on the f****in’ jam jar!” and “Trigger, trigger, trigger, shoot that n****r!”.


Honours

The Toffees were league champions more than half a century ago in 1962/63, but this win was later discounted as entirely worthless when it was revealed that they’d done it through doping https://www.liverpoolecho.co.uk/spo...s/how-everton-won-league-performance-10426058 As their former goalkeeper revealed “we could have as many amphetamine tablets as we liked. On match days they were handed out to most players as a matter of course.”

Everton also claimed the FA Cup in 1984/85 through blatant and unashamed cheating and strong arm tactics. The winning ‘goal’ was ‘scored’ by thick-headed misogynist dinosaur Andrew ‘Andy’ Gray (A serial womaniser with 5 children by four different women) who simply ran full pelt at the keeper and shoulder charged him over the line, in a similar style to which most of his children were doubtlessly conceived.

[Shindig]

Love that. :D

[Luke Emia]

Must admit, I'm a little confused as to why Pep has been charged for wearing his Catalan Independence ribbon months after he started wearing it and weeks and weeks after Mourinho said 'I would be banned for this'.

It seems odd timing, I know the yellow ribbon also represents a form of cancer (Leukemia?) so maybe there's a sponsor/charity issue?

P.S. I just worked out the Luke Emia joke. I thought it was a reference to some player or something.

I didn't pick that name. DM changed it years ago.

[Luke Emia]

Pochettino said that Dembele is on the same level as Maradona in his presser today...

They've surpassed the Busby Babes, we're now at 'Top 5 players of all time' level.

Yeah I saw that. This Spurs thing still blows my mind, they are a good side don't get me wrong but based on recent coverage you would think they were 20 points clear not fifth.

[Jimmy Floyd]

This Stoke XI is ridiculous. There are several I have simply never heard of.

[John]

I thought the top knot had died out but no, there's Choupo-Moting proudly sporting a belter.

[Foe]

This Stoke XI is ridiculous. There are several I have simply never heard of.

The team on paper looks absolutely bang average. Shaqiri must be questioning the logic that took him to Stoke.

[John]

Stoke are about his level. It's rare he properly stands out.

[Spikey M]

He’s brilliant in increasingly rare flashes.

[John]

He isn't good enough for anyone in the top six, and even somewhere like Everton would be questioning his four goals last year. At Stoke he's a hero just for having signed from Inter Milan and the odd time he shows a bit of talent is a bonus.

[Foe]

Yeah, he's total crap.

Schmeichel should really save that.

[John]

About seventy per cent of the time he is, that's the problem. If he was doing that regularly he wouldn't still be there.

And he looks like Patton Oswalt, which isn't great if you want to be taken seriously.

[nsd]

Shaqiri has been our standout player this season, which admittedly isn't saying a lot. We'd be dead and buried without him. He'll be gone in the summer without a doubt.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Bruno Martins Indi has played like peak Desailly today. Remarkable scenes.

Another rule change I'd make if in charge of football would be that if you do that praying hands thing when a free kick is given against you, it's a life ban.

[-james-]

967379194928869376


When you back a team and their keeper forgets he's playing football.

[Jimmy Floyd]

I have never seen anything like that.

If Stoke go down, Butland should be made to pay the entire financial deficit back to the club himself after that. Talk about letting your team mates down.

[Adramelch]

It happens in FM every now and then. They're predicting the future clearly.

[John]

Lambert reckons Butland is the best goalkeeper in Britain. He's been into the Glenlivet a bit early.

[John]

Look at Redknapp sitting like a child, one shoe on top of the other.

[Magic]

Fucking hell. That's insane.

[Shindig]

Oh, my. We've done alright this half.

[Smiffy]

So I've had a look at the fixtures and it's safe to say that this is going to be the greatest smash and grab in league football history when we steal the title off City.

:eyemouth:

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Oh, my. We've done alright this half.

But not the second.

[Shindig]

Could've been 10th. :( As soon as they pulled one back, it felt inevitable. Liverpool next. Ouch.

[Mike]

Heck yes. Tim knows!

[Lewis]

lol at Patrice Evra still getting booed for being racially abused.

[Reg]

Edited the post to fix Sunday Prem games. Both on Sky in case anyone wondered why they weren't.

Really happy for Knockaert today. Could barely contain himself celebrating. Made a cockup of his somersault, falling on his arse, but managed to come out of it looking reasonably athletic by doing a second flip from the floor. He does work hard, the lovable little imp.

If watching MOTD look out for the worst missed pass in history from Izquierdo. You wouldn't believe that was the same player who scored that screamer a few weeks ago.

[Weaver]

We all think the Premier League are TV whores, but I’ve just been watching some of Inter Milan vs Benevento, and BT have four Serie A games on tomorrow (SPAL/Crotone, Sassuolo/Lazio, Juventus/Atalanta, Roma/AC Milan) and then a Monday Night game too (Napoli/Cagliari or Bologna)

Does anyone have the appetite to watch that much football? I don’t think I’d watch six games of Premier League even if it was Newcastle and then Man City, Man Utd, Spurs, Arsenal and Liverpool playing teams (rather than West Brom vs Burnley, Brighton vs Huddersfield). Just seems like a madness.

Speaking of madness, I’ve just seen the Fulham vs Wolves highlights and Mitrovic looks good again!

[Lewis]

I would accept a heavy United defeat if it meant Arsene Wenger's true blue gunner gooners (bang!) winning the League Cup.

[Lewis]

Googling 'true blue gunner gooner' brings this (https://www.theguardian.com/media/1999/oct/22/tvandradio.g2) article from 1999 up. Obviously it remains unanswered.

[Lewis]

http://www.independent.co.uk/sport/football/premier-league/fabian-delph-transformation-full-back-pep-guardiola-genius-a8225111.html

Chief Sports Writer.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

What a shit song to bring up.

[phonics]

There will definitely be several idiots saying he should go to the World Cup as a left back on the back of it.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Googling 'true blue gunner gooner' brings this (https://www.theguardian.com/media/1999/oct/22/tvandradio.g2) article from 1999 up. Obviously it remains unanswered.

The visual transposition from the end of the 1999 Guardian article dropping shitbombs on Clive Anderson and Mark Lamarr, to this, is simply glorious:


Since you’re here …

… we have a small favour to ask. More people are reading the Guardian than ever but advertising revenues across the media are falling fast. And unlike many news organisations, we haven’t put up a paywall – we want to keep our journalism as open as we can. So you can see why we need to ask for your help. The Guardian’s independent, investigative journalism takes a lot of time, money and hard work to produce. But we do it because we believe our perspective matters – because it might well be your perspective, too.

I appreciate there not being a paywall: it is more democratic for the media to be available for all and not a commodity to be purchased by a few. I’m happy to make a contribution so others with less means still have access to information.
Thomasine F-R.

If everyone who reads our reporting, who likes it, helps fund it, our future would be much more secure. For as little as £1, you can support the Guardian – and it only takes a minute. Thank you.

[Lewis]

The problem with socialist newspapers is that they eventually run out of other people's adverts. I bet 'Thomasine F-R' still only gives them about three quid a month.

[Shindig]

There will definitely be several idiots saying he should go to the World Cup as a left back on the back of it.

Hopefully James Milner goes instead.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Why do goalkeepers shout AWAY when a corner comes in? Are professional defenders not aware of this ambition?

[Pleb]

Is this the preshow for the shower of shite that's going to happen this afternoon then?

[Magic]

No the other thread is.

[-james-]

Crystal Palace are fielding a player that doesn't have a wikipedia page, and I think about half the names on their bench are made up.

[Giggles]

Why do goalkeepers shout AWAY when a corner comes in? Are professional defenders not aware of this ambition?

Surely it's to tell the defenders that they're going for it and to fuck off out of the road.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Crystal Palace are fielding a player that doesn't have a wikipedia page, and I think about half the names on their bench are made up.

Their two-carthorse approach is intriguing as well.


Surely it's to tell the defenders that they're going for it and to fuck off out of the road.

In this example Hennessey was on his line and it was just a standard header clear from someone else.

[Reg]

Why do goalkeepers shout AWAY when a corner comes in? Are professional defenders not aware of this ambition?
:D I imagine it to be more distracting than anything else, especially if it's poorly timed.

[Bob Sacamano]

I've just noticed Glenn Murray has notched double figures in the league, on the plane.

[Shindig]

Nah, Charlie Austin and Danny Ings have those seats reserved.

[SincereTheRebel]

I'm just come to comment on Aurier doing two foul throws in one half of football Kill yourself.

[Reg]

I've just noticed Glenn Murray has notched double figures in the league, on the plane.
There was a fan on the radio yesterday seriously suggesting the same.

[Jimmy Floyd]

How can you keep doing foul throws? That's three in a game.

[Shindig]

I'd look into suspicious betting as soon as he did one.

[Lewis]

I've just turned this on, but if Fosu-Mensah doesn't get at least fifteen games for United next season Ryan Giggs should be the manager.

[randomlegend]

Looks like Martial on the left and Sanchez on the right :drool:

18-0 Utd.

[Waffdon]

That would have been some goal from Chelsea.

[randomlegend]

Can't get the ball :drool:

0-18 Chelsea.

[Jimmy Floyd]

United would have about 10 more points if their shirts were a proper United shade of red rather than this luminous nonsense.

[randomlegend]

:D

I haven't got a clue what formation we are playing. It almost seems like Lukaku is on the right...

[Jimmy Floyd]

We'll probably lose this 3-0, but those first three minutes were among the most exhilarating of my life.

[Reg]

:D

I haven't got a clue what formation we are playing. It almost seems like Lukaku is on the right...
Diamond like Alan Smith said - so Lukaku's the right sided striker and has to cover that side a little more.

[Lewis]

I think it makes sense to see every tactical decision from here until the end of the season as one long MIND GAME against the Paulp Ogba camp.

[Jimmy Floyd]

If only Ferguson had spotted the player Danny Drinkwater was going to turn into, they wouldn't have needed to spend all that money on Pogba in the first place.

[-james-]

Scott McTominay exists for a £18 million move to Newcastle/Villa/Watford in the summer.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Scott McTominay exists for a £18 million move to Newcastle/Villa/Watford in the summer.

I like this SHACKLES job he is doing on Hazard, which involves standing quite near him like a weirdo in a bar.

[Pleb]

Sanchez :face:

[randomlegend]

Diamond like Alan Smith said - so Lukaku's the right sided striker and has to cover that side a little more.

Martial is staying wide though. It's like he's been told one thing whilst everyone else had been told another.

I'm not sure that was as bad by Sanchez as it first looked, he was coming onto it really awkwardly to get any kind of decent contact on it first time.

[Lewis]

Shit 'keeper get him sold.

[SvN]

Shambles from De Gea there. And McTomminay completely switched off.

[Waffdon]

I don’t know if you can blame De Gea for that. Willian proper thumped that.

[Pleb]

#MourinhoOut

All seething aside that shot was sexy.

[randomlegend]

Should Valencia not have just stepped up there and left them all 3 miles offside?

[Lewis]

I don’t know if you can blame De Gea for that. Willian proper thumped that.

Yeah, unless you set yourself up expecting it to hit you in the chest you're a bit stuck. The defenders all bumbling about are at fault.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Nice keeping from the human sieve De Gea. Not sure where the left side of your defence was though.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

That was nice between Sanchez, Martial and Lukaku.

[Pleb]

:drool:

[Jimmy Floyd]

Why wasn't the game stopped for a head injury to Christensen? Health and safety mate.

[randomlegend]

That's a brilliant goal.

EDIT: Think my stream is a bit behind lol

[Lewis]

The key point there for those of us in his fan club was that at every stage in that goal he actually played his weight and help people off. If he did that consistently it would make up for a lot of the other annoying things he does.

[Waffdon]

Hazard really needs to shoot more. Far too unselfish .

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

The referee should be sacked for that.

10 yards back from the foul and the ref didn't even know they had restarted but went with it.

[Jimmy Floyd]

If Hazard took a shot even about 25% more often it would be quite nice.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Hazard really needs to shoot more. Far too unselfish .

I like it as a trait, in contrast to the absolute bullshit going on in Paris at the moment, but there are times when it's clearly the best option and he refuses.

[randomlegend]

The referee should be sacked for that.

10 yards back from the foul and the ref didn't even know they had restarted but went with it.

Yeah that's going in the book. Atrocious refereeing.

[Pleb]

Pogba had all the fucking space in the world to twat that.

[Waffdon]

Morata just isn’t very good at kicking a ball.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Might I suggest Conte's traditional full back switch might be Emerson in place of the useless murderer.

[randomlegend]

I doubt I could get to Manchester in time, mate.

[Lewis]

This is alright now, with Ogba shaking Kante off and getting into it, but there is still nothing on the right. 'Alexis' has the intelligence to come in when necessary, so why not just have him there nominally?

[Jimmy Floyd]

We should just keep raining shots in on biscuit hands by the looks of it. Target their weak player.

[-james-]

Who won the toss? United at a clear disadvantage kicking into the sun this half, I wonder if teams have a nerd with a spreadsheet telling them which games to choose an end in.

[Jimmy Floyd]

I think he knows he can't fit a cap over his stupid top knot and he's too embarrassed to admit it.

[Lewis]

Lukaku mate.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Messi Lingard :drool:

Great ball in my Romelu too.

[Ian]

Lovely stuff from both of them there. It's weird how you get better chances when your crosses aren't a load of fucking toss.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Furious with this, we were very comfortable in the game and yet again the hairpiece has tried to preserve the draw half an hour out. Willian has been a lazy arsehole since half time.

[randomlegend]

Lukaku. Best player in the world Lewis?

[Lewis]

Lukaku. Best player in the world Lewis?

Second best Belgian at United. This has probably been his best game for them though. He looks UP FOR IT (or whatever the modern wankerspeak equivalent is), and you can see the difference.

[Lewis]

Now we're talking. The actual best player in the world. :cool:

[SvN]

lol at Fabregas' hair.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Hopefully this is Alonso playing his final game of the season, he's just not good enough.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Not even close to offside. Fucking refs at Old Trafford as per.

[randomlegend]

Pfff that was tight. Not sure.

[Lewis]

Absolutely vintage Antonio Valencia there.

[Jimmy Floyd]

We've been fucking awful second half. Scared to make a decision, poorly coached, and have let a very ordinary United team back into it without them ever doing anything decent. Taking Hazard off brainless shite. Should still have drawn it with that offside.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

That's the sort of shit he should be doing.

[Lewis]

That's what we want to see you fat twat.

[Lewis]

lol at Sky lingering on the managers hoping for a bit of DRAMA. Anyway:


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pnPaOi6F4wc

[Waffdon]

Corner in last minute hitting first man. Shock.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

The mind games worked.

[Ian]

Where the fuck did that turn of pace come from?

[Jimmy Floyd]

We're heading straight to Thursday nights now unless Spurs choke. Will probably be alright then I guess.

[phonics]

We're going to get battered.

[Giggles]

€30 to sing. Fucking hell :D

http://www.corkcityfc.ie/home/2018/02/25/official-singing-section/