What shall your weekend bring?

[Lewis]

I have my own place now.

You moved out of your brother's house yet?

Nope. :cool:

[SincereTheRebel]

It's hard for me to believe, but surely people really grow up wanting to be a pole vault athlete. Im watching athletics now and its bonkers sports.

[Offshore Toon]

Samadini

[-james-]

I had two pints and then a large mixed pakora on the way home on Saturday night. 36 hours later and my insides are still not happy about it.

[phonics]

Samadini

[igor_balis]

did my familial duties and went to see my nan and my dad this weekend before i fuck off tomorrow morning. still doesn't really feel like i'm leaving, and i doubt it will until i have to actually go to work at my new place on wednesday.

[igor_balis]

Just had an excellent but exhausting weekend. Norwich - Rugby Thursday night, via a few drinks with my Norwich pal at the pub, and 3 very misguided cans of Adnams ghost ship on the train, and a 10pm jamaican takeaway from my favourite place in rugby.

Unfortunately a combination of the booze and maybe the food gave me the absolute worst gutrot hangover on Friday. Got the train to london to see the mountain goats who were amazing, but it took me about 8 pints to displace the hangover and I went for about 15 shits in various london pubs that evening.

Then Brighton Saturday, saw James acaster who was fucking brilliant, then the equally brilliant spellbound club night at komedia. Me and my mates also got an 18 inch pizza and cheesy curly fries, two things I've never seen on a menu. Currently reading a book about chess and praying for my liver and anus.

[mugbull]

You are living the life

[Foe]

Going to spend this coming weekend offshore because I’m worried I’ve taken more annual leave than I should have this year. :uhoh:

[Raoul Duke]

Just had an excellent but exhausting weekend. Norwich - Rugby Thursday night, via a few drinks with my Norwich pal at the pub, and 3 very misguided cans of Adnams ghost ship on the train, and a 10pm jamaican takeaway from my favourite place in rugby.

Unfortunately a combination of the booze and maybe the food gave me the absolute worst gutrot hangover on Friday. Got the train to london to see the mountain goats who were amazing, but it took me about 8 pints to displace the hangover and I went for about 15 shits in various london pubs that evening.

Then Brighton Saturday, saw James acaster who was fucking brilliant, then the equally brilliant spellbound club night at komedia. Me and my mates also got an 18 inch pizza and cheesy curly fries, two things I've never seen on a menu. Currently reading a book about chess and praying for my liver and anus.

I was at that Mountain Goats gig too 0/

[Pepe]

I thought he meant actual mountain goats. I would travel to see that, goats are ace.

[Boydy]

I thought he meant actual mountain goats. I would travel to see that, goats are ace.
They're no llamas though.

https://thumbs.gfycat.com/NastySeparateGrouse-size_restricted.gif

[Lewis]

You can feel the voice change at 'and 3 very misguided cans of Adnams ghost ship on the train'.

[Giggles]

What’s “my Norwich pal” about? Is there a single designated one in locations around the country?

[Baz]

Goats are one of the worst animals going.

[Giggles]

Tasty if cooked right.

[Spikey M]

Baz being outrageously wrong yet again.

[Foe]

Tasty if cooked right.

You could’ve been pappis’ personal chef when he was at Newcastle with your curries..

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Tasty if cooked right.
I'm surprised it's not sold more in the UK (no idea how readily available it is in bottom Ireland as well but I guess it's the same), it's a lovely lean meat.

[Giggles]

5 live GAA games tomorrow including two finals, the F1, the Masters final round, Ireland vs Wales, Shelbourne in their promotion/relegation playoff, and whatever NFL is on. I’m not even getting dressed tomorrow :drool:

[Spikey M]

Went for a walk along the Coast/Marsh Lands for the first time in years today. Beats Southend fucking Seafront fairly easily (as would wading through sewage).

https://i.ibb.co/H28vgL0/20201128-151827.jpg
https://i.ibb.co/D521ysn/20201128-151836.jpg
https://i.ibb.co/jGpKPTc/20201128-151942.jpg

[Giggles]

That’s just reminded me that I haven’t been anywhere at all since February. Not that I probably would just go for a random walk but I’d have probably been in a hotel on the coast or something.

[Raoul Duke]

I went to the Van Gogh museum earlier and then watched Hamilton this evening. Man, I wish I'd got tickets to see it live.

Tomorrow my mission is to buy a Xmas tree (and do some tax paperwork :moop:)

[Shindig]

Went over to my parents for the first time since the summer to clear some stuff out. One more visit should get all of my gear out of there. It was nice to see another couple of towns for the first time in ages. They've finished doing that fancy bridge/stream bollocks in Chester-le-Street. The EU paid for that. Suckers.

[Foe]

I went to the Van Gogh museum earlier and then watched Hamilton this evening. Man, I wish I'd got tickets to see it live.

Tomorrow my mission is to buy a Xmas tree (and do some tax paperwork :moop:)

It’s way more clever than I expected. Such a well made spectacle. Loooooong

[Raoul Duke]

It’s way more clever than I expected. Such a well made spectacle. Loooooong

Yeah - super long but excellent. Tailed off a bit in terms of tunes and went more "traditional musical".

[igor_balis]

Does feel quite nice to be able to bump this particular thread, but you'll have to wait for the usual triumvirate of weekend zaniness (the three Bs - BEER, BUMLICKING AND BANTER).

Matey has organised his usual yearly Eurovision party, but him and his missus have also invited both sets of their parents. And they're keen to be fairly "responsible" re: the rules, so it's gonna be watching eurovision on two tellies outside, under some sort of gazebo. It's already an absolutely not from me, but I now see that he's insisting on everyone getting covid tests before coming round, including a couple our age who are fully vaccinated. Fuck that. There's only one thing that someone could stick up my nose that would make me more likely to go and drink lukewarm cans of carling and make awkward conversation with my mate's weird in-laws, and it isn't a covid test nose swab!!!!!!! lolllll

[Spikey M]

Come watch it with me Igor. I'll make it fun by not actually putting the Eurovision on the telly.

[Lewis]

The three Bs - BEARDS, BACON, AND BILL FUCKIN' MURRAY

[igor_balis]

https://ih0.redbubble.net/image.470015511.9684/ap,550x550,12x12,1,transparent,t.u2.pnginers, https://ih0.redbubble.net/image.470015511.9684/ap,550x550,12x12,1,transparent,t.u2.pngrive-Ins and https://ih0.redbubble.net/image.470015511.9684/ap,550x550,12x12,1,transparent,t.u2.pngives


https://th.bing.com/th/id/R891b2885e155c82fc6a4ee2942b1b098?rik=SqMe3CwoKWJG cQ&pid=ImgRaw

[Spikey M]

Big Black Bock.

[Lewis]

balis' bad banter bettered by Betts. :bvictory:

[igor_balis]

bro i swear to god i'll phone vince russo again. bro.

[Lewis]

'Is this your deal, balis? That's why this forum's in the damn shape it's in, because of bullshit like this.'

[Shindig]

:stamford: I knew we had a finger poke of doom somewhere.

[Don]

Gardeners' World on a Friday night :drool:

[Pepe]

Became a father last night. :cool:

[Lewis]

Well done to the anchor baby.

[Lewis]

Unless it's a cat then not well done really.

[Pepe]

:D

I also got my green card earlier this year (or was it late last year?)

[Shindig]

Congratulations. I eagerly anticipate what disaster will unfold in the lab due to sleep deprivation.

[Lewis]

I think my friend has been living/working there illegally for the best part of four years now. Other than the fact he can't leave the country, and doesn't dare risk going out of California in case he gets deported for drinking in the street, they don't seem to have put much effort into kicking him out.

[SincereTheRebel]

Since goals opened. Ive been tracking the wins and losses of the six a side and two man were 14-0 before tonight. The streak was ended and i was awarded the motm :cool:

[Spikey M]

As if marrying a French bird wasn't bad enough, he's added to their numbers.

[Ian]

Pepe will do anything to get a Streets of Rage 4 partner.

(Congratulation, Pepe. :cool:)

[Kikó]

Became a father last night. :cool:

Congratulations chap

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

I hope you call it Pepito.

[Ian]

Cuauhtemoc Pepe.

[Pepe]

Thanks everyone.

It’s a girl, but Cuauhtemoc was definitely suggested in case we had a boy. My wife was not a big fan, and that was without me even mentioning the inspiration.

[Pepe]

I think my friend has been living/working there illegally for the best part of four years now. Other than the fact he can't leave the country, and doesn't dare risk going out of California in case he gets deported for drinking in the street, they don't seem to have put much effort into kicking him out.

They really don’t try at all. For all the complaining, being an immigrant in the US (legal or otherwise) is pretty easy.

[Spikey M]

The ICE guys in the Ice-cream van over the road are seething at that.

[Lofty]

Congrats Pepe :cool:

I am at a wedding today so going to drink as much as I can and wake up in a pool of vomit tomorrow.

[Kikó]

Went on work drinks last night. Fucking hell my head has not missed this.

[Boydy]

Congrats Pepe!

I went to the pub and had three pints on Tuesday evening and felt shit all day Wednesday.

[Pepe]

Covid turning us all into lightweights. “Don” will be floored just from smelling alcohol.

[Spikey M]

He wishes he could smell alcohol.

[Pepe]

:lol:

[Don]

Yo, Fathers 4 Justice crew, pipe down and go put your breastfeeding bras on.

[Queenslander]

Copping nasty banter off them Kiwis

[Baz]

Hooters is garb. It’s like an even shitter Nando’s but with Sky Sports News on the telly.

[Lofty]

Shock. So are the yank ones and the Vegas casino.

[phonics]

I’ve woken up for a cig and there’s a noise above me so loud I can only assume there is a dog living in my roof...

https://streamable.com/tq7f4p

[Shindig]

Or a heavy child.

I caught up with my parents for the first time in six months. They only test once a month in the care home but I guess they'll all be double jabbed. My dad's beard is here to stay and it looks ridiculous when he's got a mask on. It was really good to see them. :)

[Disco]

If Imgur wasn't so useless on mobile I'd post a pic of the view from yesterday. Pissing with rain today though.

[Disco]

Here we are.

https://i.imgur.com/eKliw6I.jpg

[Spikey M]

I'm sitting on a garden chair in the lounge surrounded by boxes.

[Disco]

If it's any consolation the view behind was less fun.

https://i.imgur.com/lgfn5hx.jpg

[Baz]

Just drove past DC on Tesco car park. :)

[Baz]

Right I’m sorting out a minibus for work people going to a wedding. The [night only] invite says ‘8 til late.’

I’ve asked the groom (my mate from work) and he says last orders is 12:30 and officially ends at 1.

I should book the return pickup for 1am, right?

[Disco]

Mostly rain, for three weekends in a row now. I've been working at my parents house while they have scaffolding up doing all sorts of little repairs, painting, replacing guttering etc and I think there's been one day without rain. Resorted to starting at 5.30 this morning in order to finish before the shitty weather came in.

[igor_balis]

I've not massively missed the #clubs but I was delighted to go to my first proper house party since covid last night, my mates 26th birthday. Highlight was probably getting a good ten mins or so snogging the birthday lady. Lowlight certainly sweating my balls off and failing to get to sleep on a tiny sofa as the aforementioned birthday lady let off a steady stream of fucking disgusting farts and loudly snored on the other sofa.

[Spikey M]

Manc

[Offshore Toon]

@anyonebutIgor

[igor_balis]

https://youtu.be/unRldLdllZ8

[Jimmy Floyd]

Nowhere else for this to go but I have to relate it so it's going here.

Two married men are friends. Let's call them Ron Smith and Nigel Thompson. It's the 1970s and they're in their twenties or maybe early thirties. They go around doing whatever male friends did, in those days: playing sport, drink-driving, sharing the odd prostitute. All in the name of good, clean fun and being self-described colourful characters. They go on the same golf trips, cricket tours etc together. Life is good.

Anyway, Ron then decides to leave his wife, and runs off with Nigel's wife, Susan. Time passes. Nigel decides that, despite Ron having run off with his wife, it's not worth wrecking the craic at the golf society over such a trifling matter. In fact, Nigel decides to stay top mates with Ron, who has now married Susan himself, and they carry on living it up together for decades to come, but with Susan on Ron's arm throughout, rather than on Nigel's.

Finally, Ron goes a bit ga-ga in his old age. Susan, younger than Ron but a doting wife, nurses him through his final days. After Ron dies, all his friends are sad and want to mark his passing in some way. A global pandemic is on so it's not easy, so Susan decides to hold a memorial charity cricket match in Ron's memory. It's a great idea and all Ron's old friends agree to come. Obviously, Susan is the guest of honour around whom the day's events are structured. Days before the event, a programme is sent out to all the attendees with the order of events for the day. At the top, it says:

CHARITY CRICKET MATCH IN MEMORY OF RON SMITH
Compere: Nigel Thompson

Now, I'm going to this very event on Sunday. What I want to know is: has there ever been a bigger 'cuck' than Nigel Thompson in the whole of human history?

[Spikey M]

:lol:

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Oh Nigel.

[Ian]

Fucking hell, Nigel.

[Disco]

Did Nigel ever re-marry? If he did then it may say more about her than him (but still also quite a lot about him).

[Cord]

Perhaps this is the moment Nige has been waiting for all these years?

At the very least if he hasn't got 'Ron was a cunt' in bunting he's missing a fantastic opportunity.

[Shindig]

Whatever. Nige is still alive. He can get back with Susan.

[igor_balis]

Whatever. Nige is still alive. He can get back with Susan.

I assumed this was going to be part of the punchline as I read it :(

[Shindig]

Went over to my folks today. My sister was there with the kid and it was nice to catch up. The kid's a problem, though. He needs boundaries and a slap. He unlocked the door to my parents apartment so naturally the dementia bloke wandered his way in. Thank God he was pretty docile.

Hit your kids.

[Waffdon]

I can’t believe a kid unlocked a door!

[Shindig]

He also ran around the flat with his pants around his ankles. You have to lock the bathroom door because he follows you in and does this.

[Disco]

Does Shinners live in an Alan Bennett sketch?

[niko_cee]

How old is this kid?

[Offshore Toon]

Did the dog's behaviour improve after you gave him a clap?

[Shindig]

Four so I guess that's the age range of kids pushing their luck.

[Spikey M]

He needs boundaries and a slap. He unlocked the door

:cab:

[Vercetti]

Should have chinned him.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Should have chinned him.

My money would be on the kid.

[Spikey M]

Initially, yes. But the bacteria under his nails would get the kid eventually and shinners takes the war.

[Giggles]

All kids need a few slaps.

[Lofty]

I agree, yesterday was ruined by the fact we had to see my brother in law because he had his daughter down, we were supposed to meet them out somewhere for a meal but he managed to rearrange it to his mum's presumably to save money. His plan was to go there with his kid and his mrs' two kids for 6 hours with nothing to entertain them in a house which is kept to show home levels of clean, knowing it was forecast torrential rain.

Naturally the kids were playing up almost immediately but he was too busy vaping and playing on his phone to parent. As we left it looked like the kids had managed to break some expensive furniture. The difference is the other kids in the family are so well behaved, they never ask for anything or wander off in a stranger's house even if bored. These kids were done over by their idiot parents but still shouldn't be trying to wander around upstairs in a virtual stranger's house (I'd say none of those kids has ever been there more than ten times in their life).

[igor_balis]

Me, a couple of colleagues and an old friend went to NUNEATON last night, it was lots of fun. they have this proper grungy greb bar full of skinheads and metalheads and all that.


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q3J_M_lUk2o

Big fan of my first post-covid live music being that.

Highlight of the evening was winning all three games of pool I played, lowlight being the really crap joke I tried to make to some random bloke next to me at the bar who just stared at me for what felt like about ten minutes before I shamefully dashed off without getting a drink.

[Baz]

Nobody ask.

[Giggles]

I just went for a big fry.

[Giggles]

About an hour to the hurling final now, big bag of cans in a bucket of ice, and the Limerick machine to roll on :drool: Summer Sundays are the best.

[Foe]

Big fan of those extra big share size bags of sweets.

Just smashed about a billion calories worth of dairy milk caramel nibbles and I do not at all feel bad about it. :drool:

[igor_balis]

Big fan of those extra big share size bags of sweets.

Just smashed about a billion calories worth of dairy milk caramel nibbles and I do not at all feel bad about it. :drool:

My team at work's bit of the office is always full of them and it's a large part of why I'm overweight. Zero self control with snacks.

[igor_balis]

Banning middle aged women from bringing cakes and shit into offices would be a huge step in fighting the obesity crisis.

[Don]

Just get the geezer wit the 8 pack abs to bring in fruit on his bday. The fatties soon fall in line through shame and correct their behaviour.

[Giggles]

Gammon gammon gammon etc.

[Foe]

Feel sick now. :(

[Lewis]

I came home to find the bomb disposal people had closed the street off and evacuated the flats next door. Not my flats, and everybody in my flats was just inside; but because the road was closed I had to sit watching it with the evacuated mugs. Apparently some idiot was arrested and they noticed a 'suspicious package', but it appears to have been nothing.

'I've done a CBRN course, sweetheart, so if you could move your faggy little robot...'

[Baz]

Surprised you stayed and watched and didn’t go for a mooch.

[Spikey M]

He works for the MOD, he'd have bowled in, flashed his Printer Card and defused it himself if he had a bit about him.

[Shindig]

Nah, Lewis is colourblind. He'd doom them all.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Went to a Chilli Festival (http://beningtonlordship.co.uk/chilli-festival/) today and I tried a hot sauce which was the hottest thing I've ever tried. They also had a hotter one but the guy said they weren't allowed to let people try without an ambulance there.

Instantly started coughing, had hiccups for 5 minutes, I could feel it on my tongue for about half an hour, vomited saliva twice and I was weeping for a while. Also gave me stomach cramps although that might have been because I tried it on an empty stomach.

[Offshore Toon]

Weeping?

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Tears.

It didn't go further than that thankfully.

[Lewis]

Surprised you stayed and watched and didn’t go for a mooch.

It was worth it for the evacuated stressing out and thinking it was a major drama. There was a bloke seething and claiming not to have been out of his house for six months. I asked why and he went 'Er, isolating?' like I'm a dickhead. 'Yeah, but why the last six months?' He goes - again, like I'm a retard - 'The variants'. He had his daughter with him, who presumably goes to some sort of school and/or mixes with other people. What?

[Offshore Toon]

Tears.

It didn't go further than that thankfully.
I was just clarifying as I was imagining you sobbing into a handkerchief like a newly crowned widow.

[igor_balis]

https://frinkiac.com/meme/S08E09/825273.jpg?b64lines=TWFob3csIGZpbmQgeW91ciBzb3VsIG 1hdGU=

[Raoul Duke]

Sun goes up, sun goes down

[phonics]

If any of you have some spare cash buy one of these and you can sell them on eBay for 3-5x within a week.

https://www.uniquelygeekly.com/collections/ampjam-2021

[Baz]

If any of you have some spare cash buy one of these and you can sell them on eBay for 3-5x within a week.

https://www.uniquelygeekly.com/collections/ampjam-2021
Nearly bought the set of 3 BTTF but £7.50 shipping put me off. What are they and why can they be resold for 5x in a week?

[phonics]

Olly Moss is a famous artist for nerd stuff. I bought one of his non famous pieces for 25 and it’s now worth 400. He never does reprints so it can’t go down in value.

[Baz]

Pumpkin picking this morning, and then out for breakfast with my mate and his family.

Then it was looking like an afternoon of furniture building - dining table, six chairs, some shelving unit, nest of tables, probably something else I’ve forgot. But my dad put up the dining table yesterday afternoon while I was at Van Gogh Alive (load of shite) so that gave me the positivity I needed to smash out four of the chairs last night, so far less to do later.

My new dining table is well good though. For a table, anyway. Proper solid and just the right size.

[mo]

I fucking love assembling furniture.

[Spikey M]

Baz's reference to Pumpkin Picking has just thrown me back to a troubling incident from my past. 2018 was the year and we had just taken our then 2 year old Pumpkin Picking for the first time. On the way back, we stopped off for a celebratory McDonald's in Basildon. I should have known there and then something was going to go awry. You don't stop in Basildon.

But there we were and there he was. "He" was a thirty-something man, sat alone at a table, with a BigMac. No chips and no drink, I hasten to add. Anyway, he began to eat, "as you do" you may think, but no, he ate "as you really fucking don't".

He's eating the fucking thing layer by layer. First the top of the bun, then he scrapes the cheese and the sauce off the burger and sucks it off his fingers (there's no lettuce or onion, I can't discount that he may have been Giggles. Giggles? Where were you in October 2018?), then on to burger 1, then the middle and so on.

He then stood up, leaving the box on the table and left.

What the fuck did I witness? A mental breakdown? Almost certainly, but we can't rule out that this was Basildons version of Bruce Wills being sent into 1980's Harlem with some racist signage. Either way, it's stuck with me. I wonder what became of him.

[Shindig]

Probably just your run of the mill retard.

[Alex]

I feel slightly shaken reading an eye witness account of that, so I can only imagine how viewing it live made you feel.

[Giggles]

Do McDonalds do a burger without lettuce and onion? Game changer.

[Spikey M]

Nah, it normally comes with Lettuce and Onion so he must have asked for it to come without them.

[Jimmy Floyd]

That's genuinely quite disturbing.

[Kikó]

Finishing on the bottom bun must be a major disappointment. On a related note, I bought a double whopper from burger king and it was immense. Started with the top layer and

[Shindig]

Don't keep us in suspense.

[Spikey M]

Give him a minute, he has cheese and sauce all over his hands.

[Giggles]

Knife and fork.

[Lofty]

I am going glamping in Herefordshire in this weather for an ill advised stag do. Taking two bottles of Jim Beam with me, wish me luck.

[Manc]

Original? The red stag black cherry effort is possibly one of the most dangerous drinks available. Goes down smoother than silk.

[Lofty]

Original but I concur on the black cherry shout. I have gone on the train as I wasn't paying £80 for a bus, said bus has managed to make virtually no progress since 10am this morning. Going to be pissed on my own at this rate.

[Kikó]

I love the honey one as well. Basically death in a bottle.

[igor_balis]

Got the train to an industrial estate outside cov to buy a new pool cue this morning. I convinced myself my eye injury 10 years ago and subsequent loss of depth perception had killed my game but after the first hour I played today I think I can still go pro lads.

Got an 8.5mm tip which is the smallest I've ever gone and it's amazing how much better it was. Yevrah get the tournament booked.

[Lewis]

Takes it to the pub, lets somebody have a go on it who ruins the tip, never takes it out again.

[Lewis]

'I just want a little go with it. Don't be tight.'
'its my cue i brought it from home and...'

[Kikó]

First night in Frankfurt so tried to acclimatise and head to the Irish pub. Got some new United mates now to watch all the games with.

Flat hunting tomorrow with the hope we find something relatively quickly.

[Lewis]

'No, I'm *originally* from Manchester, but we've just moved here from London.'
*four double denim lads telling you Oasis are 'really fucking cool'

[Shindig]

Ask them if they know Fry Crayola.

[Kikó]

We're all Fry Crayola in some way.

[Kikó]

'No, I'm *originally* from Manchester, but we've just moved here from London.'
*four double denim lads telling you Oasis are 'really fucking cool'

We're talking early to late 40s guys here wearing replica tops (one with a zebra top, the other the Vodafone one I associate Ruud with 01?). After the first two goals, they got up to do the respective celebrations (I'm not joking).

Come on man u.

[Spikey M]

People supporting foreign teams always cringes me out.

"HALA MADRID", says Greg from Hounslow, chucking plastic pig heads around.
"Man knows North London is red, isn't it?" responds Raj from Banglahore.

Shut the fuck up lads.

[Lofty]

I get enough shit being northern and supporting Arsenal, but those were the rules in my house as a kid.

[Giggles]

Most people I know are “we” merchants about Liverpool and Man Utd :face:

[Baz]

Most people I know are “we” merchants about Liverpool and Man Utd :face:

Do you respond with “did you play, yeah?”

[Giggles]

It’s not really about whether they played or not, but I wouldn’t waste my time responding anyway.

[Bam]

"Man knows North London is red, isn't it?" responds Raj from Banglahore.

Bit racist. :brighton:

[Spikey M]

Bit racist. :brighton:

It's alright, Raj's dad is from Barrow In Furness.

[Lofty]

:D

[Shindig]

A new plus for the new area: I get a great view of the fireworks from the Riverside. It sounds like Beirut. :drool:

[Raoul Duke]

The indie band with the ukuleles and accordions?

[Shindig]

Yes. They've changed their whole sound.

[igor_balis]

Mate and his missus had a plague wedding last October, I was originally a groomsman but didn't make the cut for the covid-restricted numbers. They decided to do it then but then basically do it again properly with everyone this year. I had the sense they were gonna do the fun party bit this time and fuck off the church, but nah, had to do my limited groomsman duties.

I was shitting it a bit cus they'd bought us groomsmen matching suits, slim fit, and mine was 40R /34R which, when i tried to wear it for another wedding 6 months ago...jesus. Months of eating crisps and drinking took its toll. Thankfully yesterday I managed to just about squeeze it on, but it was a day of very consciously not making any kind of big, sudden movements, and trying to avoid sitting down.

I wasn't really looking forward to it, cus it seemed like a long fucking day and I was a bit salty about them doing it on my 30th birthday weekend, but obviously it was actually class. Covid probably helped the couple in a way cus it meant as well as catching up with randos from years back like all weddings, it also meant plenty of people got to see actual friends for the first time since covid. Lots of free booze and we got a massive roast with 4 different meats. Cool.

[Baz]

Let’s see you in your small suit?

[igor_balis]

Let’s see you in your small suit?

https://scontent-lcy1-1.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t1.15752-9/267524974_610751616850455_7471142558282896106_n.jp g?_nc_cat=105&ccb=1-5&_nc_sid=ae9488&_nc_ohc=Eyw6pY1gZiAAX_SKsy5&_nc_ht=scontent-lcy1-1.xx&oh=03_AVLX0ZsSsR_3rvfYfOfqvFUqfY0yf212IjfmjA0X1dMf LQ&oe=61E2F5FC

not bad

https://i.ibb.co/C6Y8QNw/wot.png

i resent that being someone's instagram story

[Spikey M]

https://scontent-lcy1-1.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t1.15752-9/267524974_610751616850455_7471142558282896106_n.jp g?_nc_cat=105&ccb=1-5&_nc_sid=ae9488&_nc_ohc=Eyw6pY1gZiAAX_SKsy5&_nc_ht=scontent-lcy1-1.xx&oh=03_AVLX0ZsSsR_3rvfYfOfqvFUqfY0yf212IjfmjA0X1dMf LQ&oe=61E2F5FC


How much did the Down Syndrome Ed Byrne lookalike set you back?

[igor_balis]

fucking hell :D

[Lewis]

How much did the Down Syndrome Ed Byrne lookalike set you back?

He looks like both of these (https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/av/uk-31084387).

[Lofty]

Lockdown hasn't been kind to Ross Noble either.

[Baz]

Went to B&Q before. What a place. :cool:

[Giggles]

Full of loads of different things and therefore full of dirt.

[Lewis]

I am pricing kitchens up at the minute, and the B&Q woman was showing me mock-ups on the screen and saying things like 'It won't line up perfectly but...' while I'm sitting there twitching.

[Giggles]

You want a kitchen then go to a kitchen shop, you want tools then go to a tool shop, you want plants go to a gardening shop, etc. B&Q, Homebase, etc are for butcher DIY dads.

[Lewis]

I wanted to know the price scale across different retailers.

[Baz]

I needed 2 screwdrivers and some HG mould spray. :dc:

[Alex]

I spend all weekend in Dublin, which was a first for me. Great city, had a cracking time. I didn't do a lot else other than drink, to be fair. But it's about as good a city for that as I've ever visited.

I was absolutely convinced the "Guinness is better in Ireland" thing would turn out to just be a load of shit. But it was noticeably (sometimes quite a lot) better. I suppose there's every chance it could just be the psychological effect of being in Dublin making my brain think that though.

Yesterday's landing back at Manchester airport was dicey though. Fucking hell. I'm not a nervous flyer either, but I didn't enjoy that at all.

[niko_cee]

I always assumed the it being better thing [which is a thing] was down to volume consumed/pipe condition/back alley rumours as to the pasteurised state of the product/proper pouring etc.

[Alex]

That is definitely a shout. Particularly the speed they go through it. There's absolutely no chance of it sat around going rancid is there. There definitely did seem to be a much more concerted effort going into the correct pouring of it, too.

[Kikó]

I'm off to Madrid for the day tomorrow. Climate hypocrite!

[Ben]

With Guinness I always thought Guinness in Irish pubs is brewed in Ireland whereas Guinness everywhere else is from Liverpool.

99% sure I was told that pissed up so it’s no doubt bollocks.

Edit: it was London not Liverpool. And they closed it so indeed us uncultured swines drink the proper Irish stuff. Kind of staggering really considering some of the shocking pints I’ve had over the years.

[Shindig]

It probably depends on the person pouring it, too.

[Lofty]

It definitely is dependant on the bar in question and their pride in the pint, usually I have found there is one pub in a town that does a far better Guinness than anywhere else.

[Manc]

I'm off to Madrid for the day tomorrow. Climate hypocrite!

Full report on the Wanda please. I've been told it's completely out the way.

[Baz]

I’ve never had a bad Guinness.

[Luca]

Full report on the Wanda please. I've been told it's completely out the way.

By the airport isn’t it?

[Giggles]

The two part pour is just marketing to reinforce the legend. Clean pipes, proper temperature, and the frequency a tap is used are the biggest factors. I’m not sure if there are as many reps making sure things are up to scratch in other places as there are here.

Also, Dublin is a kip.

[Manc]

By the airport isn’t it?

Precisely.

[Lewis]

I thought about going to Dublin before the kung flu struck, but, seeing as I wouldn't be arsed about spending all day drinking Guinness in one of the tourist traps, it looked like I could do it all in a day, so I never bothered. Another plan was to go to Dublin, get the train to Belfast, and then fly back from there; but then that misses the rest of the country. Is it worth seeing somewhere like Cork or driving around the place a bit?

[Giggles]

I’d definitely fly into Cork and see west county Cork and Kerry. Could even head up to Limerick then and fly back out of Shannon.

[Boydy]

Dingle is nice.

[Baz]

Have some tiki cocktails (mocktails) with Blindboy in Limerick.

[Spikey M]

Dublin is fine, but it really doesn't feel like a city. Which is no bad thing. It's alot better than London.

[Alex]

Aye, it didn't feel like a particularly big place while I was there. Although I didn't particularly go out of my way to explore every nook and cranny. But I agree that played in its favour. And it's absolutely a lot better than London.

Although as a card carrying Yorkshireman I appreciate I am probably not best placed to impartially judge the merits of our nations capital. :D

I'm down there twice in a fucking week very soon. :moop:

[niko_cee]

I thought it was pretty bleak, but I would imagine it is a lot shinier now.

'London' is basically a country so the comparison is entirely pointless.

[Ian]

I’ve never had a bad Guinness.

Not me, but then I've also never had one that made me think it was anything more than alright, even before I was a beer turbodork.

[-james-]

I love London. Probably because I've pretty much only ever been there for the purpose of seeing mates or for nights out.

[Jimmy Floyd]

London is at least five cities, maybe more, each of them larger and with more to them than any other UK city.

[phonics]

All cities are the exact fucking same anyway these days.

[Kikó]

Alright grandad.

Agree with Jimmy's assessment though. My time living in Islington will be nothing like some of my mates living in Clapham or Brixton.

[Spikey M]

London is at least five cities, maybe more, each of them larger and with more to them than any other UK city.

1 City surrounded by slums.

[Giggles]

To be honest, if you’re doing a city here and it’s not for the socialising aspect of it (the sesh) then Dublin probably is best as there’s the most to see. I’d still rather do the scenery in the west myself but it involves a lot of travelling around.
If going on the batter then Cork or Limerick (or some of the smaller towns like Athlone or Kilkenny) are miles ahead of Dublin because of the people.

[Shindig]

Aye, my primary reason for traveling is to look at things rather than a social experience. Ireland was on my pandemic list along with London which, obviously, went south from laziness.

[Luca]

Got engaged today, which means I’ll probably transform into a miserable married man very soon.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

5 figures on the ring?

[Baz]

5 figures on the ring?https://c.tenor.com/KYuDGc7r2RwAAAAC/freaks-and-geeks-neal-schweiber.gif

[Giggles]

I got tickets to a craft beer festival before I remembered most craft beer drinkers here are fucking wankers (a different kind of fucking wanker than I am).

[Lewis]

https://c.tenor.com/KYuDGc7r2RwAAAAC/freaks-and-geeks-neal-schweiber.gif

:lol:

[Luca]

:D

That’s good.

[Foe]

Congrats Luca. :wub:

[Foe]

Is the Nike suit an option for the wedding?

[Luca]

Poor form to match the groom, IMO.

[Giggles]

I nearly want to go to the big parade tomorrow just because John C Reilly is the main man at it.

[Jimmy Floyd]

The Arab was talking to an Irish customer on the phone earlier, who mentioned that they have two days of bank holiday for the rest of the week. The Arab, blissfully unaware of anything, went off on the 'Aah, I wish we in UK had this holiday! It isn't fair on us!' in the bullshit chatty way that he likes, much to the customer's indifference. I've added a note to include the history of Anglo-Irish relations in module 17 of his training programme.

[Boydy]

Part of the UK gets it. :baz:

[Spikey M]

Found a new Vape shop yet, dickhead? :baz:

[Boydy]

Yeah, I was able to see one up the street today because it wasn't raining fucking sand here.

[Giggles]

Part of the UK gets it. :baz:

Do you fucks get it? You shouldn’t even get the 17th when ye have July.

[Giggles]

The Arab was talking to an Irish customer on the phone earlier, who mentioned that they have two days of bank holiday for the rest of the week. The Arab, blissfully unaware of anything, went off on the 'Aah, I wish we in UK had this holiday! It isn't fair on us!' in the bullshit chatty way that he likes, much to the customer's indifference. I've added a note to include the history of Anglo-Irish relations in module 17 of his training programme.

In fairness it has nothing to do with independence so he’s probably ok. It’s not something I’d bay an eyelid at and I’m stauncher than most.

[Boydy]

Do you fucks get it? You shouldn’t even get the 17th when ye have July.

Depends on your workplace. Most places I've worked that do get it take a day for it and a day for the 12th instead of the 12th and 13th.

[Giggles]

We’ve a northty stroke artist at the moment is taking both and I’m going to make it my mission to out the hun cunt.

Anyway, July are national holidays there and everyone should be made take them. Patrick’s day is for Ireland only not fucking plastic nordy paddies heading for Donegal.

[Boydy]

We’ve a northty stroke artist at the moment is taking both and I’m going to make it my mission to out the hun cunt.

Anyway, July are national holidays there and everyone should be made take them. Patrick’s day is for Ireland only not fucking plastic nordy paddies heading for Donegal.
https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/7/7d/Slemish_%286%29_-_geograph.org.uk_-_624718.jpg

[Lewis]

The idiot at work tried to be funny about getting an Irish passport to 'piss off Americans' (what?), and merely revealed that he is eligible for one. Now we bully him for being Irish and he seethes the house down.

'They were born before 1921!' :moody:
*everyone bouncing off the walls*

[Giggles]

https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/7/7d/Slemish_%286%29_-_geograph.org.uk_-_624718.jpg

Is that Ben Bulben? That’s in Sligo.

[Boydy]

It's Slemish.

[Giggles]

British Slemish.

[Boydy]

St Patrick's Slemish.

[Shindig]

First impressions of San Francisco:

Nothing can prepare you for the smell. The homeless problem is right on show. One of them had a hammock setup. The landscape is awesome. Canny weather.

[Clunge]

What does it smell of? Guilt?

[Manc]

Herb.

[SvN]

First impressions of San Francisco:

Nothing can prepare you for the smell. The homeless problem is right on show. One of them had a hammock setup. The landscape is awesome. Canny weather.

Yeah, the homeless population is staggering. Do the alcatraz tour, it's superb.

[Giggles]

Patrick’s day parades are so weird. Savage crowd this year though.

[Shindig]

Yeah, the homeless population is staggering. Do the alcatraz tour, it's superb.

Setting off in an hour for that. I smelt weed waiting the BART but the rest of the time it's been the stench of hot shit.

[Shindig]

Yeah, the homeless population is staggering. Do the alcatraz tour, it's superb.

Setting off in an hour for that. I smelt weed waiting the BART but the rest of the time it's been the stench of hot shit.

[Spoonsky]

First impressions of San Francisco:

Nothing can prepare you for the smell. The homeless problem is right on show. One of them had a hammock setup. The landscape is awesome. Canny weather.

If you drive and don’t mind paying up the arse for gas, consider taking a day to rent a car and driving up to Marin County or Sonoma. Beautiful there, Muir woods is outstanding and Sonoma is gorgeous wine country. Or hit the Marin Headlands or one of the beautiful beaches there. It’s all great. Plus you get to drive over the Golden Gate Bridge.

[Ben]

Your petrol prices are nowhere near ours. What's high for you is still very cheap for us. In your money we pay about $8 a gallon currently.

[niko_cee]

Muir Woods [and the drive over the Golden Gate] is definitely worth it.

Do they still have the Jelly Bean factory in Oakland? Probably wouldn't recommend that unless you're some sort of superfan.

[Spikey M]

Have you ever been anywhere that isn't in California Shinners?

[Giggles]

I don’t think San Francisco would suit me.

[Spikey M]

I've no desire to visit a square inch of the country.

[Giggles]

I liked a few places I was in before like Austin and Portland but I’m very much at ease with the fact I’ll probably never be in the country again. At one time I’d love to have went to a Packers game but I’m not as pushed on that now either.

[Spikey M]

I will probably get strong armed into DisneyLand at some point. I look forward to paying 10 grand for a hotel with 1970's decor and being shot at for accidentally driving on the wrong side of the road.

[Danny]

Orlando is good because there is a LOT to do, especially if you are only there for a holiday. We usually do a couple of weekends a year down there and rotate the parks we go to. It was Universal last year, during the height of COVID so there was no fucker there :drool:

If you do end up doing Disney most hotels have shuttles to get you around so you dont have to fuck about with traffic and parking. Well worth it tbh.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

I wouldn't mind going to Disney again, if only to geek out with all the Star Wars stuff now.

Building my own lightsaber? Sign me the fuck up.

[wullie]

In Orlando I'd recommend having a look around Celebration, the creepy town Disney made. Proper Truman Show stuff wandering around there.

[Shindig]

I’m amazed Disneyland doesn’t send some autist postal with the constant noise. It looks like hell.

And I’ve been to New York, Spikey. If we include airports, I’ve also dipped into Seattle and New Jersey.

Seattle’s airport is a bit of a disaster.

[igor_balis]

I think I'd rather go to Birmingham's Christmas market again than go to a Disney thing, even with the promise of making my own ligthsaber.

[niko_cee]

Disney is only acceptable when you are taking kids.

When you see the [long] lines to 'meet the characters' and there is nary a child in sight I never cease to be amazed. Imagine being the poor sap actor who has to meet all those weirdos.

[Spikey M]

I used to work with a Disney fanatic. All of her office clothes were Disney, all the music she listened to was Disney, all the films she watched were Disney, and her fairytale-happy-ever-after-marriage that lasted less than a year, was at Disney World and the Honeymoon at Disney Land.

On balance I think might hate her more than anyone that has ever lived. Liking Disney is not a personality, you tragic cunt.

[Spoonsky]

I knew a guy whose parents were like that and raised him into it. Was verging on a cult.

[igor_balis]

I used to work with a Disney fanatic. All of her office clothes were Disney, all the music she listened to was Disney, all the films she watched were Disney, and her fairytale-happy-ever-after-marriage that lasted less than a year, was at Disney World and the Honeymoon at Disney Land.

On balance I think might hate her more than anyone that has ever lived. Liking Disney is not a personality, you tragic cunt.

I think this post is a perfect counterargument to 'just let people enjoy stuff!' We have a societal duty to bully these people.

[Lewis]

Last person in the world who wants to be pushing that line of thinking.

[igor_balis]

Don't make me get Vince Russo, dogfucker (RIP).

[Shindig]

It just screams damaged goods when anyone is that into disposable media. Adults into Lego, Disney, etc are unilaterally childless husks.

[Pepe]

Adults into Lego

:uhoh:

[-james-]

Where do adults into a football team fall?

[Shindig]

Sport is different. It's tribalism. Not 'Harry Potter taught me how to love again.' It's a very different attachment.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Sport is an actual real endeavour, rather than a scripted product. Adults into WWE, though...

[Kikó]

There's a number of those deviants on here.