What shall your weekend bring?

[igor_balis]

I would like to clarify that I am a man who has a beard, rather than a "beard man". The whole pseudo-subculture, beard-as-personality thing is tedious and I refuse to be tarred with the same brush, you cunts. On balance I'd rather have the occasional spacker beard-bro give me a high five saying "nice beard man!", than look like a 14 year old.

I can't make any excuses for the rest of my personality, though.

[Lewis]

That's what they all tell themselves. Give us your top ten Ron Swanson quotes you epic cunt.

[igor_balis]

Maybe I should double-down and just embrace being a cunt.

I'll get one of those t-shirts you see advertised (not you specifically) on facebook with ultra specific things on the back like "I AM A BEARD GUY FROM WARWICKSHIRE I WAS BORN IN DECEMBER I LIKE MY INDIE MUSIC TWEE AND MY WOMEN TO HAVE CRIPPLINGLY LOW SELF-ESTEEM AND IF YOU DON'T LIKE THAT I'LL DO FUCK ALL BECAUSE I'M A COWARD", with a few eagles and american flags thrown in.

[Lewis]

'Respect the Beard'.

[John]

Slogan tees are the fucking worst. I saw one the other day with 'Death Before Decaf' on it. There's no quicker or more effective way to out yourself as a tit.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

I sometimes get given them and just use them as pyjamas.

[Baz]

I just got given a belter (and I normally only ever wear plain T-shirts) which is the peppa pig logo only the text says death grips. :cool: he ordered it from America though so it’s frickin’ MASSIV.

[SincereTheRebel]

Never trust a man with no facial hair.

[Spikey M]

Bull shit. Every good disguise includes facial hair. Bunch of fucking frauds.

[SincereTheRebel]

It's those cleanly shaven mother fuckers I don't trust.

[igor_balis]

avin a tinny in the front room as my mum watches a work training video on her laptop about invoicing orders. why the fuck am i getting a train to stupid london, this is the life

[igor_balis]

also, thoughts on train beers, lads? i feel like it doesn't make me look (more like) a deviant on the 7pm to Euston on a Saturday in clothes obviously picked for getting my boogie on, right??

[John]

If you're worrying what the people on the train will think of your outfit then you definitely need the beers.

[igor_balis]

oh no i've no worries about my threads daddio, just wondering if it's socially acceptable to be necking a can of lager on the train. i was just hoping the fact i'm wearing clothes obviously picked for a night out was something of an extra mitigating factor.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

At worst you'll look like a tramp who jumped the gates.

[Spikey M]

You’ll look a right scummy cunt.

So why not have a couple of cans to take the edge off? :henn0rz:

[igor_balis]

The very first tinder date I went on, after three years of involuntary celibacy, I got so nervous I necked a whole four pack of Stella on the train on an empty stomach in my dishevelled work clothes. It went as well as you can probably guess.

[Baz]

I just got given a belter (and I normally only ever wear plain T-shirts) which is the peppa pig logo only the text says death grips. :cool: he ordered it from America though so it’s frickin’ MASSIV.Ive put it on a 90 degree wash and intensive dry cycle. :yn:

This reminds me though, what’s happened to Offshore Toon?

[Lewis]

I think we just had a minor earthquake - or ghostquake - up here.

[Spikey M]

It was probably just Rio Ferdinands tantrum because he could have done better than the Tyson fight.

[Giggles]

Didn't realise my seats today were so close to the front and never brought suncream for my head. Burnt to absolute bits.

http://i64.tinypic.com/2lsz80m.png

[SincereTheRebel]

Sunburn :lol:

[igor_balis]

I had a month of borderline problematic chemical usage, and was quite looking forward to the vanilla evening i had planned - hanging out with a little gang of fairly dorky old school friends, have a few drinks, then call it a night. I even, very optimistically, booked an advance train ticket for 11.50 from euston this morning. Told the anecdote of my irresponsible behaviour the previous weekend involving excess coke usage, and one of the ladies in our gang surreptitiously messaged me saying "fancy getting some tonight". Just two pints in spoons + my train tinny was already enough to break my resistance, and I immediately left the pub to phone my London man, and within half an hour i was waiting by a sketchy block of flats before getting into a car with 3 scary latino blokes to pick up.

Was meant to go back to house of girl who lives 20 mins from euston, ended up in fucking CROYDON doing lines with my mate and her boyfriend until about 9am. I just got home after the most fucking ghastly overground-overground-tube-train journey that took about 3 hours, and haven't been to sleep since 7am yesterday.

What a fucking spacker. Maybe me and phonics need a joint TTH intervention.

[Spikey M]

Get fucked, we need the drama. Too many Norms these days.

[Giggles]

Sunburn :lol:

Fuck it I'm in a beer garden now topping it off :drool:

[Foe]

Was it GAA you were watching? I watched about ten minutes of it last night and it seems to be a complete mess of a sport. The goals are almost pointless because the aim appears to be get within about 50-60 yards of the goal in some space and smash it high trough the posts. It'd be like awarding Tony pulls the rule book to football.

Seems really popular though. Do they basically force it on you in school?

[Giggles]

Was it GAA you were watching? I watched about ten minutes of it last night and it seems to be a complete mess of a sport. The goals are almost pointless because the aim appears to be get within about 50-60 yards of the goal in some space and smash it high trough the posts. It'd be like awarding Tony pulls the rule book to football.

Seems really popular though. Do they basically force it on you in school?

It's barely played in schools. You were also watching Tyrone which is akin to watching Pulis x10. The game today was even worse.
It's not supposed to be like soccer anyway though.


.

[-james-]

I've been off it for a while, but I think it's highly unlikely I'll be able to make it through a month of world cup related day drinking without succumbing to the urge to get the coke in.

[mugbull]

I had a month of borderline problematic chemical usage, and was quite looking forward to the vanilla evening i had planned - hanging out with a little gang of fairly dorky old school friends, have a few drinks, then call it a night. I even, very optimistically, booked an advance train ticket for 11.50 from euston this morning. Told the anecdote of my irresponsible behaviour the previous weekend involving excess coke usage, and one of the ladies in our gang surreptitiously messaged me saying "fancy getting some tonight". Just two pints in spoons + my train tinny was already enough to break my resistance, and I immediately left the pub to phone my London man, and within half an hour i was waiting by a sketchy block of flats before getting into a car with 3 scary latino blokes to pick up.

Was meant to go back to house of girl who lives 20 mins from euston, ended up in fucking CROYDON doing lines with my mate and her boyfriend until about 9am. I just got home after the most fucking ghastly overground-overground-tube-train journey that took about 3 hours, and haven't been to sleep since 7am yesterday.

What a fucking spacker. Maybe me and phonics need a joint TTH intervention.

Eeeegor

[Spikey M]

What we really need is a good old rivalry. Someone petty enough to follow the other from thread to thread kicking off. Sadly you all killed Harold and Henry’s stuck in the first stage of grief.

[bruhnaldo]

Surely I'll get offended by something soon, don't worry Spikey-san.

[Waffdon]

I had a month of borderline problematic chemical usage, and was quite looking forward to the vanilla evening i had planned - hanging out with a little gang of fairly dorky old school friends, have a few drinks, then call it a night. I even, very optimistically, booked an advance train ticket for 11.50 from euston this morning. Told the anecdote of my irresponsible behaviour the previous weekend involving excess coke usage, and one of the ladies in our gang surreptitiously messaged me saying "fancy getting some tonight". Just two pints in spoons + my train tinny was already enough to break my resistance, and I immediately left the pub to phone my London man, and within half an hour i was waiting by a sketchy block of flats before getting into a car with 3 scary latino blokes to pick up.

Was meant to go back to house of girl who lives 20 mins from euston, ended up in fucking CROYDON doing lines with my mate and her boyfriend until about 9am. I just got home after the most fucking ghastly overground-overground-tube-train journey that took about 3 hours, and haven't been to sleep since 7am yesterday.

What a fucking spacker. Maybe me and phonics need a joint TTH intervention.

Get this meet sorted out ASAP.

[bruhnaldo]

So Friday the supporters group i joined for Orlando City is throwing this benefit event... gonna be a "Masquerade Ball"... I've ordered this mask:

https://images-na.ssl-images-amazon.com/images/I/71p8ty-l80L._UX679_.jpg

I was at Burlington (kinda like a TJ(TK?) Maxx but bigger and a little better variety of stuff) and saw this pink suit jacket made by Tommy Hilfiger so I've decided to basically go full Miami Vice:

http://www.asuitthatfits.com/offthecuff/wp-content/uploads/2013/06/mv_01.jpg

I've got white dress shoes too lol Gonna be ridiculous. I'll try and post pics.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Fucking hell.

[bruhnaldo]

:) Exactly.

[Baz]

Cool mask, for what it is.

[SincereTheRebel]

I'm surprised people still do coke. I would have thought coke and drugs would have evolved and there would be some new type of wave that people would use to get them where they want to go.

[Spikey M]

I’ve read that 3 times and still have no idea what that means.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

A literal wave that transports people.

[mugbull]

Drugs are sick, why would you ever get rid of them

[SincereTheRebel]

Cocaine is still very popular. Why hasn't it been replaced with some new super drug? Its decades old now isn't it?

[phonics]

Cocaine is still very popular. Why hasn't it been replaced with some new super drug? Its decades old now isn't it?

What?

[Giggles]

Cocaine is still very popular. Why hasn't it been replaced with some new super drug? Its decades old now isn't it?

Because there are still many many mongs about.

[mugbull]

Sincere do you think that all cocaine in existence was created 30 years ago and it's been slowly going bad over the years?

[Spikey M]

Cocaine is still very popular. Why hasn't it been replaced with some new super drug? Its decades old now isn't it?

I mean... I... what?

[Giggles]

I'd say he means it's been around decades.

[Spikey M]

Yeah, still what?’

[SincereTheRebel]

I give up

[mugbull]

If someone comes up with some super cocaine I'm sure it'll take off, for now it's a perfectly enjoyable substance

[igor_balis]

If someone comes up with some super cocaine I'm sure it'll take off, for now it's a perfectly enjoyable substance

I've heard crack is quite moreish.

[bruhnaldo]

It's cause coke is ... i don't wanna say it but... RELATIVELY harmless compared to oh idk... anything else but weed.

[mugbull]

Crack is seriously addictive though

[Disco]

First of all, cocaine has been around a lot longer than a few decades. And it hasn't been 'replaced' because there's a huge infrastructure behind it making a ton of money, just like lots of other industries. I might invent the best damned lemonade you've ever tasted but if I'm just making it in my shed then I'm not replacing coca cola any time soon.

Cocaine is readily available, easy to take, and people are familiar with it. It would take a lot to replace it with something may not be any of those things.

[Mazuuurk]

Great pitch.
Fuck it I'm sold. Where do I invest?

[Disco]

vCash only.

[mugbull]

Yeah okay it’s been around for a century, but it’s a pretty solid product. If it lasted much longer it wouldn’t be such a casual thing, which is a big selling point

[Giggles]

Munster hurling final Sunday, nothing beats it :drool:

[-james-]

My mate is getting married at the weekend.

The invite says to give them money for their honeymoon by way of a gift, if we feel like it.

What's the procedure for this? He earns loads of money so I know he doesn't need it, but he is probably paying a decent whack for me to be there. Do I just chuck him a hundred quid (from two of us) or something? Am I a cunt if I don't?

[SvN]

I would. Just put it in a card.

[Spikey M]

My mate is getting married at the weekend.

The invite says to give them money for their honeymoon by way of a gift, if we feel like it.

What's the procedure for this? He earns loads of money so I know he doesn't need it, but he is probably paying a decent whack for me to be there. Do I just chuck him a hundred quid (from two of us) or something? Am I a cunt if I don't?

It’s pretty standard these days. Me and my other half did it and it was our spending money on Honeymoon. The alternative is having 60 toasters and 13 kettles.

[niko_cee]

When you say weekend, do you mean Saturday afternoon?

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Gave money to my cousin when he got married a few weeks ago.

Also, in Poland its standard to give flowers at a wedding (fuck knows why) and he asked for guests to give a bottle of wine or a book instead.

[Spikey M]

A book? Was he marrying Henry?

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Yeah I'm not sure why, I also thought they'd get mainly wine but he said it was about 50/50.

[-james-]

When you say weekend, do you mean Saturday afternoon?

Yes I do. The reception is at his house, so there will be a telly, but they're all arty football is shit weirdos. I'm sure there will be an uncle or someone that wants it on though.

[-james-]

If not, there's always tvcatchup in the toilet.

[SincereTheRebel]

I once saw a wedding invitation with the people's bank account and sort code number on it. Deposit the coins straight in.

[Andy]

My mate is getting married at the weekend.

The invite says to give them money for their honeymoon by way of a gift, if we feel like it.

What's the procedure for this? He earns loads of money so I know he doesn't need it, but he is probably paying a decent whack for me to be there. Do I just chuck him a hundred quid (from two of us) or something? Am I a cunt if I don't?

I usually stick £70 in a card.

[Lewis]

Put a fiver in, and then another five in pound/two pound coins.

[-james-]

I thought the England game was the evening kick off. Nope, it's at three. Fuck.

[igor_balis]

If anyone I knew got married during an England world cup game id tell them to get fucked. New friendships can always be made, it coming home can only happen once every four years, two including euros.

[Jimmy Floyd]

League cricket on Saturday is going to be brilliant. They've given us dispensation to have a tea break that lasts the duration of the game, but that in itself will be chaos. My lot have held up pretty well but I bet some teams will have to play with 7 and all sorts.

[niko_cee]

I remember playing cricket through England v Scotland in Euro 96, which was a bit of a bummer.

[Boydy]

League cricket on Saturday is going to be brilliant. They've given us dispensation to have a tea break that lasts the duration of the game, but that in itself will be chaos. My lot have held up pretty well but I bet some teams will have to play with 7 and all sorts.

Can't you just postpone it?

[Jimmy Floyd]

There's no time to postpone it to. Has to be on Saturday afternoons and the other ones all have other league rounds. So we get on with it like true Englishmen.

[Disco]

Plus it is just a game of football, it's pretty simple to watch it later.

[Shindig]

Especially now that the games have thinned out.

[Waffdon]

There’s a bus load of us going to an 18 hole Footgolf course tomorrow leaving at 10. Not sure what state we’ll be in by the time the back 9 comes around but should be a laugh.

[Spikey M]

There’s no way they let your sort on a golf course.

[Waffdon]

Looks quite posh too. Just outside Edinburgh. Only £2 to rent a golf cart so I’m thinking putting the beer on that with a ice cooler.

[phonics]

I just got a spam text from Dominos asking if I want a large pepperoni pizza. It's half ten in the morning lads.

[Spikey M]

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-scotland-scotland-politics-44829539

Tell him we said hi.

[Spikey M]

I just got a spam text from Dominos asking if I want a large pepperoni pizza. It's half ten in the morning lads.

Breakfast of kings.

[igor_balis]

gonna do some hoovering and washing now lads

[Waffdon]

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-scotland-scotland-politics-44829539

Tell him we said hi.

That’s a shame. The Open starts in Carnoustie next week so I assumed he come up here. Ah well.

[Boydy]

There’s no way they let your sort on a golf course.

It's footgolf. It's made for his sort.

[mo]

257 exam questions left to mark, so that's my Saturday. Will be gla to get it done and not have it hanging over me anymore.

[SvN]

My wife finished yesterday as that was the deadline. Are you sure you haven't missed it?

[Giggles]

Croke Park later, will be fucking rammed though.

[Shindig]

Avoiding town like the plague today. Hopefully someone interrupts Corbin's speech again or the miners decide to get on with their lives. Or bother from the England game spills into the crowd.

[mo]

My wife finished yesterday as that was the deadline. Are you sure you haven't missed it?

Different deadlines for different subjects/exam boards. Mine's tomorrow.

[Kikó]

Looks quite posh too. Just outside Edinburgh. Only £2 to rent a golf cart so I’m thinking putting the beer on that with a ice cooler.

I think I know the place. Please don't ruin it. The lady who owns it is really bloody nice.

[igor_balis]

by complete chance i also ended up playing footgolf today. good laugh, and my mate hit a stunning hole in one.

[Spikey M]

I like the idea of Footgolf but my knee wouldn’t allow it. Maybe a Spikey Vs DS Paralympics version, but that’s about it.

[Mike]

Going drinking with Baz and two of our mates this afternoon. Can’t wait!

[SincereTheRebel]

Football golf is a fun game. I always nearly end up fighting with man though. It's that competitive.

[Giggles]

:cool:

1023251832108470273

[niko_cee]

Did that nail someone in the crowd?

[Spikey M]

That sport is what happens if Vince McMahon liked Hockey.

[Giggles]

Did that nail someone in the crowd?

No there's a netting. He was near worth the €45 I paid in on his own.

[igor_balis]

Got totally trashed on Saturday and sent the most graphic booty call fb message to a girl I was once involved with romantically. Fuck sake. I even messaged the Romanian. Wish phones came with breathalysers lol!!

[-james-]

I met up with a mate who I see about once a month for the purpose of getting drunk together, and he told me he's basically an alcoholic now. I'm not hugely surprised, but I suppose we're going to have to find actual activities now.

[Mazuuurk]

Got totally trashed on Saturday and sent the most graphic booty call fb message to a girl I was once involved with romantically. Fuck sake. I even messaged the Romanian. Wish phones came with breathalysers lol!!

There ARE apps for that actually, they will lock your phone if you seem too drunk based on how you type.

But, I doubt you're actually interested in anything that might make you behave a bit more proper and ruin your image.

[Mazuuurk]

I met up with a mate who I see about once a month for the purpose of getting drunk together, and he told me he's basically an alcoholic now. I'm not hugely surprised, but I suppose we're going to have to find actual activities now.

Don't get it - isn't that perfect then?

[-james-]

I suppose it is. I've struggled to keep up at the best of times though.

[bruhnaldo]

"The Romanian" sounds like a fun story.

[igor_balis]

There ARE apps for that actually, they will lock your phone if you seem too drunk based on how you type.

But, I doubt you're actually interested in anything that might make you behave a bit more proper and ruin your image.

Ha. Nah I do want to be less of a state, having anecdotes to share with the tth ladz is just a minor consolation.

[Mazuuurk]

Sort yourself out then and quite complaining. Either you embrace being a fuckup (which I can respect) or you do something about it.

[igor_balis]

But I want to have my cake and eat it, dickhead.

[phonics]

Can you lace cookies with anything more explicit than weed? I got given one by a colleague when half way through she messaged me telling me to enjoy in a way I'm not sure I was expecting. Good cookie though.

[igor_balis]

pcp

[Giggles]

Jizz.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Cocaine can be used instead of flour.

[bruhnaldo]

phonics is drugged phonics is drugged phonics is drugged phonics is drugged phonics is drugged (etc)

[John]

Can you lace cookies with anything more explicit than weed? I got given one by a colleague when half way through she messaged me telling me to enjoy in a way I'm not sure I was expecting. Good cookie though.

Anything generally absorbed through the stomach can go in an edible, but if she's popping MDMA in a cookie I imagine you'd know about it.

You don't lace things with 'weed' either. The weed is all long gone before you start making edibles, by boiling the leaves up to get the residual THC off them then throwing the leaves away.


Cocaine can be used instead of flour.

No it can't.

[phonics]

I'm not noticing anything particularly far off a base level high so I think she was just fucking with me because I said it was my first one.

It's quite nice actually. If I didn't like smoking so much I might consider just having one of these after dinner, wonder if it would help knock out any of the other side effects.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

No it can't.

Thanks for that, I was just about to make a batch.

[Spikey M]

Where did you get 500g of Cocaine from?

[Mazuuurk]

Uh, is that gluten free then?

Plus I bet such cookies would slim you right down as well. Someone sort a business of this out in California.

[mugbull]

Cocaine is way less prevalent here than in Europe. The girls are the ones that keep business chugging along

[Pepe]

First time mowing the lawn. Why does anyone bother with this shit? When I get my house I'll just pave the whole thing.

[Baz]

Cos it looks nice. Andkeeping on top of weeds in a paved yard is just as much hassle.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Tarmac it then ffs.

[Pepe]

Karting track instead of a shitty yard. :drool:

[Spikey M]

A Mexican that doesn’t like mowing lawns?

[Shindig]

Combine the two with a speedy lawnmower.

[Giggles]

Concrete/tarmac is the only way to go.

[Baz]

Concrete/tarmac is the only way to go.
Says Johnny Fancygarden over here.

[Giggles]

Says Johnny Fancygarden over here.

If it was mine it'd be gone. Tarmac, stones, and one 10'x10' of artificial grass.

[Pepe]

Combine the two with a speedy lawnmower.

https://hips.hearstapps.com/hmg-prod.s3.amazonaws.com/images/134573-it-s-back-meaner-louder-and-faster-1530880172.jpg?

https://www.roadandtrack.com/motorsports/a22070412/honda-mean-motor-v2/

:drool:

[Shindig]

Exactly what I had in mind. Imagine the grass you could cut if that had a rear spoiler.

[Giggles]

It's not over yet.

1026219508560801792

[igor_balis]

Just matched with a gross girl on tinder who messaged me "Hi Igor not a big fan of your dog, but let me sit on your face and we’ve got a deal"

Admired the forwardness enough that I've replied positively and will see how it progresses

[SincereTheRebel]

Just matched with a gross girl on tinder who messaged me "Hi Igor not a big fan of your dog, but let me sit on your face and we’ve got a deal"

Admired the forwardness enough that I've replied positively and will see how it progresses

So did you make a face baby?

[Spikey M]

Just matched with a gross girl on tinder who messaged me "Hi Igor not a big fan of your dog, but let me sit on your face and we’ve got a deal"

Admired the forwardness enough that I've replied positively and will see how it progresses

Post a pic.

[Spikey M]

Not of your shit dog.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Of the face sitting?

[igor_balis]

I replied with 'yeah alright' and never got a follow up. Maybe her mate was pissing about on her phone but I'm offended she hasn't gone for it regardless, she looks about 17 stone.

[igor_balis]

Which reminds me of the time an obese Australian called Carmel sat on my face :drool: ah memories

[Giggles]

She probably just wanted to see what it'd look like if she got herpes.

[igor_balis]

She sounded like Chris Lilley and smelled like dog food, herpes would be the last of her worries.

[igor_balis]

Unless you're talking about my tinder honey, in which case you may well be right.

[Shindig]

Hot localised flooding. So much so the road outside is a flowing river. And the back's flooded. I err.... might have to prepare for this.

[SincereTheRebel]

I replied with 'yeah alright' and never got a follow up. Maybe her mate was pissing about on her phone but I'm offended she hasn't gone for it regardless, she looks about 17 stone.

A man was recently arrested for stalking because he was messaging some model every day for three months online via the gram. Be warned lad.

[Shindig]

Was it Mahow?

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

I do not use Instagram.

[Kikó]

your honour

[Giggles]

Do you all still stalk mahow on the WhatsApp?

[Kikó]

Yes that's our life.

[Mazuuurk]

Igor you're being trolled by some 12-year old kid who wants to see how desperate people are, is all.

[igor_balis]

Igor you're being trolled by some 12-year old kid who wants to see how desperate people are, is all.

I don't think so. I get the impression she's a real person but her mate was bringing mad bantz and dicking around on her phone.

[Lewis]

I did the PEPSI MAX CHALLENGE in the centre earlier. I'm a Pepsi Max mark, so I would recognise it and choose it regardless, but I can't help thinking that serving it ice cold alongside warm Coca-Cola is a bit dishonest. Still, I got a voucher for a bottle, so good for them.

[Magic]

I came across the DEATH PHOTOS of that couple that got annihilated in Thailand where they blamed a couple of immigrants.

BRUTAL is all I can say.

I haven't seen a head caved in like that before in such detail. And also the guy was only knocked out and drowned. She was fucking pulverised. Such a babe initially as well.

[bruhnaldo]

It really is worse when they're pretty women. I hate that it's true but I'm always a little extra gutted when some gorgeous girl turns up "missing".

[Giggles]

Every avenue exhausted to get a ticket for the All Ireland Final today but not a hope. High stool it'll be unfortunately.

[mugbull]

The one thing Giggles takes seriously in life is Irish patriotism. It’s so clear.

[Giggles]

The one thing Giggles takes seriously in life is Irish patriotism. It’s so clear.

Yes. On the weekends.

[phonics]

Cannot wait for this stuff to be over so Second Captains can go back to previewing real sports.

[Giggles]

Cannot wait for this stuff to be over so Second Captains can go back to previewing real sports.

I'm unsubscribing as soon as it is over as it'll be wall to wall rugby and English soccer til next May. To be honest, they're piss poor for anyone into the GAA anyway, far better options there.

[Giggles]

:drool:

Not a hope of work tomorrow.

[igor_balis]

On my way to a wedding in fucking Somerset. On part two of my hour long train journey to new Street (engineering works), with a 3 hour car journey with a bloke I met once 18 months ago and spoke to for five minutes to come.

This better not be shit.

[Baz]

Tomorrow my mate is celebrating his 30th birthday in Liverpool from 12:30 until the last train home.

Unfortunately I am going a child’s 2nd birthday party that starts at 14:30. I’ll probably have to stay for at least two hours meaning the earliest I can get there is probably about 18:00. :(

[Andy]

Tomorrow my mate is celebrating his 30th birthday in Liverpool from 12:30 until the last train home.

Unfortunately I am going a child’s 2nd birthday party that starts at 14:30. I’ll probably have to stay for at least two hours meaning the earliest I can get there is probably about 18:00. :(

The two year old won't notice if you're not there.

[Lewis]

Why do people even buy kids birthday/Christmas stuff for the first five (say) years? Just wait until they start asking questions.

[Spikey M]

A 2 year old is old enough to ask questions and ask for shit.

I agree with the principle though. We will have a ~2 month old at Christmas and my other half and family are all asking what he’ll want. A tit to suck and bed to sleep in. Just like his dad. :henn0rz:

[phonics]

I've been in the UK since Friday.

The homeless problem in this country is fucking depressing. I thought it was just a Birmingham thing but I've been to Bristol and now just arrived in Cardiff and it's the same thing. Fucking disgusting. I must have given out about 50 quid so far already because it's so bad.

In Bristol I'd say something like every 3rd door has someone sleeping rough in it and no-one even bats an eye, like it's normal that you can't walk into Boots because fuck, you need to sleep somewhere.

[Lewis]

In Hull the council, which being a bunch of Labour saddos would presumably not pass up an opportunity to moan if otherwise, insists that there are enough beds for them at night, but half of them either forget to turn up for them in time or pass on them because you're not allowed to get wasted in the centres.

[mugbull]

San Francisco is horrible for it as well. Tent encampents all across the city. Far worse than London, never been to the other UK cities though.

[Lewis]

San Francisco sounds like the worst run population centre in the developed world.

[phonics]

In Hull the council, which being a bunch of Labour saddos would presumably not pass up an opportunity to moan if otherwise, insists that there are enough beds for them at night, but half of them either forget to turn up for them in time or pass on them because you're not allowed to get wasted in the centres.

Half the people I gave money to were begging for enough money to get into one of these places. It's 25 quid per night in Bristol apparently.

Edit: typo, 15 quid.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

San Francisco is horrible for it as well. Tent encampents all across the city. Far worse than London, never been to the other UK cities though.

I didn't see any tent encampments in San Francisco.

Downton Los Angeles though, fuck me. There were whole streets covered by tents. Genuinely one of the worst things I've seen, I was speechless.

[Lewis]

lol

[Kikó]

Birmingham is pretty awful for it. Noticed it recently. Parts of it looks like a cold war Steve sketch.

[Lewis]

He follows me on the Twitter, because I think he used to follow everyone back when he only had about a dozen fans. Now he's big time and boring.

[phonics]

Birmingham is pretty awful for it. Noticed it recently. Parts of it looks like a cold war Steve sketch.

New street is the definition of fucking depressing when you compare it to the millions spent on renovating it.

[Spikey M]

Half the people I gave money to were begging for enough money to get into one of these places. It's 25 quid per night in Bristol apparently.

Edit: typo, 15 quid.

Of course they were.

[Shindig]

The police in Durham are always shifting them on. There must be three or more regulars I spot which, for a city of this small size, sticks out like a lump. San Francisco sounds like a nightmare, though. Any city where its public transport escalators are clogged with human shit needs sorting out.

[Spikey M]

Southend town centre is like the Walking Dead these days. Cans on the go at 9am. Needles laying about. Spice being smoked. Scummy cunts.

[Giggles]

I've been in the UK since Friday.

The homeless problem in this country is fucking depressing. I thought it was just a Birmingham thing but I've been to Bristol and now just arrived in Cardiff and it's the same thing. Fucking disgusting. I must have given out about 50 quid so far already because it's so bad.

In Bristol I'd say something like every 3rd door has someone sleeping rough in it and no-one even bats an eye, like it's normal that you can't walk into Boots because fuck, you need to sleep somewhere.

You mong. Did you give all your stuff to the wallet inspector too?

[Shindig]

Phonics probably has some disposable income. I don't give but that's mainly because, if you're in that spot, it's due to a chronic problem that they need to take charge of.

[Spikey M]

You obviously get the odd genuine case, but being a druggy/Alcoholic roaming the streets conning gullible tourists is a career choice these days. Some of them are geniuses. (https://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/uknews/crime/12178026/Wolverhampton-street-beggar-makes-500-a-day-despite-having-his-own-home.html)

[phonics]

You mong. Did you give all your stuff to the wallet inspector too?

I make a lot of money in an expensive country. 50 quid is a days groceries back home. I could eat out breakfast lunch and dinner and barely crack that here. I don't mind giving them a quid here and there.

The price of stuff over here is mental. I got a Vodka Red Bull last night and the bartender asked for 2.50. I had to check if he'd got it wrong. It's 12 quid in Switzerland.

[-james-]

I'm not bothered if I give a quid to someone on the streets and they spend it on heroin instead of food. It doesn't make them a bad person. Even if they are, I give enough of my money to horrible corporations so it doesn't really stand up as an argument.

[Kikó]

Either they spend it on booze and drugs or I do.

[Shindig]

You obviously get the odd genuine case, but being a druggy/Alcoholic roaming the streets conning gullible tourists is a career choice these days. Some of them are geniuses. (https://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/uknews/crime/12178026/Wolverhampton-street-beggar-makes-500-a-day-despite-having-his-own-home.html)

We've got a one that's quite well-mannered so I assume he studied up here before going to smack central. Gets a lot of attention but I'm not sure if it gets him much money. I feel like Buskers might be worse around here.

[Spikey M]

Buskers were fine before chancers started playing buckets and boxes.

[Shindig]

Nah, I can support that. Try-hard students with guitars, I cannot.

[Giggles]

I make a lot of money in an expensive country. 50 quid is a days groceries back home. I could eat out breakfast lunch and dinner and barely crack that here. I don't mind giving them a quid here and there.

The price of stuff over here is mental. I got a Vodka Red Bull last night and the bartender asked for 2.50. I had to check if he'd got it wrong. It's 12 quid in Switzerland.

Most of them are career/professional beggars you fool.

[phonics]

Who cares I have way more money than they do. It's not even a dent.

I've gone from not being able to afford to eat to having 15k in my account in less than a year. I'm not going to cry about someone spending 50p on a can instead of a bed.

[Pepe]

Buy me an xbox.

[phonics]

I'm working on stupid things to spend it on but sadly, an Xbox for Pepe isn't on the list.

[SvN]

I've said it before, but Southampton is the worst city I've ever seen for homeless people. I get hassled by crackheads asking for money more than ten times per day.

Summer is the worst, because if you're sat outside a pub, you'll just get a constant stream of people asking for money. They even have the cheek to have a go that I've "got money for drinks". Yeah, I have you dickhead, I work for it.

[Spikey M]

I'm working on stupid things to spend it on but sadly, an Xbox for Pepe isn't on the list.

PS4 for Spikey?

[Giggles]

Who cares I have way more money than they do. It's not even a dent.

I've gone from not being able to afford to eat to having 15k in my account in less than a year. I'm not going to cry about someone spending 50p on a can instead of a bed.

Instead of a bed. Humble bragging aside, you're still a fool, just a richer fool. As the saying goes, easily parted.

[Foe]

I'll take another PS4 if they're going phonics. 3 is better than 2.

[Lewis]

If anything you should give them more so that they can afford heroin and not just food.

[igor_balis]

give me a tenner you cunt

[Baz]

Pay for teh seever

[Queenslander]

I buy food instead of handing out money.

[phonics]

I'm in London from Wednesday to Friday if anyone wants to TTH Meet it up. I promise not to bring my army of homeless friends with me.

[igor_balis]

I'm off work Friday :eyemouth:

[Giggles]

I'm off work Friday :eyemouth:

I've done Monday.

[Bam]

I'm in London from Wednesday to Friday if anyone wants to TTH Meet it up. I promise not to bring my army of homeless friends with me.

No, it's ok.

[Kikó]

phonics - where you going to be?

[Giggles]

:D The man of the people was a cert.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Don't anger him or you'll be the next Whatsapp teeheeing target.

[Kikó]

Do you really think that's my life? K.

[Mazuuurk]

Awwwwww shit! you're getting it somewhere on whatsapp now, Mahow!

[igor_balis]

I'm in London from Wednesday to Friday if anyone wants to TTH Meet it up. I promise not to bring my army of homeless friends with me.

You have two options - come to rugby and play five a side tonight or come for a drink in rugby on Friday.

Only 45 mins and £10 train :baz:

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

He's also going to need to pay for the drinks and give you £20 right?

[igor_balis]

I'd settle for a quid for the pool table and a hand shandy.

[Spikey M]

LeeCovFox and Dr Chorizo are GOING IN.

Edit: I meant on WhatsApp but they’d probably butter your helmet for a chance at some company.

[igor_balis]

Who's Dr chorizo?

[Spikey M]

N00b

[Kikó]

Who *is* Dr chorizo?

[Giggles]

Benny the big dress.

[phonics]

phonics - where you going to be?

I'm gonna be just off St. James' so I'll be around. I should be meeting my cousin tonight but I'm around all day Thu/Fri.

[igor_balis]

Who is benny

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Is who Benny?

[Kikó]

I'm gonna be just off St. James' so I'll be around. I should be meeting my cousin tonight but I'm around all day Thu/Fri.

I'm busy tomorrow night with lads and football and banter but Friday can stop for a drink in the city.

[Spikey M]

Who’s name is Harry Kane?

[Giggles]

Who’s name is Harry Kane?
Benny.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Spikey would love a nibble of his chorizo.

[Pepe]

Whose chorizo?

[bruhnaldo]

Mods please delete thread

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Mods please delete thread

Fuck off you chorizo nibbling window licker.

[bruhnaldo]

Well geeze that wasn't very nice.

[Mazuuurk]

Stop being such a Chorizo, bruh.

[Giggles]

Mods please delete thread

Stop being a Benny.

[igor_balis]

I sometimes fry chorizo and have it with a fry up. Fusion cuisine. Would this Benny character approve?

[Giggles]

He approves of all things chorizo.

[phonics]

It's really, really hard to smoke a joint in central London. There's not a side street without someone walking down it for a 10 mile radius.

[Raoul Duke]

Go to a park

[John]

Just go for it, no one cares what you're doing.

[phonics]

Just go for it, no one cares what you're doing.

This is what I did but it's a fools game. I'm right next to a military barracks so there's police for days.

[Raoul Duke]

They're more worried about Isis than someone smoking a joint

[phonics]

They're more worried about Isis than someone smoking a joint

The only positive of being the most untanned man on the planet.

[Shindig]

Thanks for taking that distinguished honour off me. Heavy lies the crown, like.

[phonics]

Thanks for taking that distinguished honour off me. Heavy lies the crown, like.

I live in a town that was 37 degrees for two months and would still out milk bottle you. It was never a contest.

[phonics]

Completed my second online meet this week. Keeks wife is delightful but I'm holding back all other opinions until I get my invite to THE GROUP.

[Bam]

Fucking took his wife!!! :roflol:

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Fucking took his wife!!! :roflol:

He wanted to show her that he's trying to help a pasty smack head.

[Bam]

"Hunny, meet Phonics from TTH" :uhoh:

[Giggles]

Sweet Jesus.

[Baz]

Fucking took his wife!!! :roflol::D

[Pepe]

Taking someone's wife. :nono:

[Giggles]

Completed my second online meet this week. Keeks wife is delightful but I'm holding back all other opinions until I get my invite to THE GROUP.

Were you introduced as someone off the internet?

[phonics]

Yep. She assumed I was a United fan though which he immediately corrected before I could. Proper Gent.

[Giggles]

Did he flash the gold cards?

[Bam]

Yep. She assumed I was a United fan though which he immediately corrected before I could. Proper Gent.

Proper Gent? More like awkward moment.