The "Donald Trump Shithole" guide 2018

[Kikó]

Because there are loads we've been to.

Middlesbrough
Crewe

[Baz]

Widnes

[Samadini]

Wales

[phonics]

Wales

Funnily enough I found a twitter account of one of the guys from camathen that I lived with. I think it was the place you came round to. He's gone all-in on Apple, Welsh Independence and Trump.

He once told me that AppleTV is called so because Granada saw the populatiry of the iPhone and rebranded to ITV so Apple couldn't use their normal nomenclature.

[Magic]

Lochgelly.
Johnstone.

[ItalAussie]

Rockhampton
Nottingham
Hamilton (NZ, not Canada)

[Alan Shearer The 2nd]

Arbroath

[Spikey M]

Coventry
Southend
Sparkhill / Sparkbrook

[Disco]

Plymouth.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Ukraine.

[Clunge]

Andover

[Lewis]

London.

[Raoul Duke]

Everywhere that isn't London

[-james-]

Thessaloniki
Athens

[Jimmy Floyd]

Croydon
Slough
Canvey Island

Everywhere else in the south is wonderful.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Luton.

[Pepe]

The U S of A.

[Magic]

Mexico.

[Trancemeister]

Malmö

[Bam]

Hull.

[Offshore Toon]

Southampton

[Bam]

Oh and Blackpool, fucking cesspit of a place. :sick:

[Spikey M]

I don’t understand how Jimmy has been to Canvey. I can drive there in 20 minutes and I’ve still only been there twice in 30 years.

[Magic]

Southampton

What?

[Pepe]

Mexico.

About 80% definitely qualifies.

[Lewis]

I like the seaside, but everywhere near the coast is objectively crap.

[Magic]

About 80% definitely qualifies.

The army guarded resorts should be their own independent countries and therefore don't count.

[Pepe]

Resorts are part of the 80%. Vile shit.

[Giggles]

Westport
Dungannon
Thurles
Dublin
Scotland
Corby
Houston

[Magic]

Have you ever been to Scotland?

[Giggles]

Have you ever been to Scotland?

I was in Glasgow and Edinburgh only last year and had even posted here about it.

[Spikey M]

Scotland, like The rest of Great Britain, is only shit where the people are. The countryside is meant to be some of the best in the world.

[Magic]

I was in Glasgow and Edinburgh only last year and had even posted here about it.

Must have been a memorable diary.

[Alan Shearer The 2nd]

Scotland, like The rest of Great Britain, is only shit where the people are. The countryside is meant to be some of the best in the world.

It's easy to take it for granted.

[Magic]

It's easy to take it for granted.

Especially when you're as devoid of emotion and ungrateful as Giggs.

[Giggles]

Especially when you're as devoid of emotion and ungrateful as Giggs.

I love a bit of scenery. As Spikey said, it's the people that make it shit.

[Bam]

Dundee and Leeds, ghastly shit.

[Spoonsky]

Thurso!

[Shindig]

The entire Scottish borders.

[Magic]

Thurso!

Yes that's a pointless place.

[Dark Soldier]

Limerick. Full of backwards cunts speaking some form of primitive language.

[Magic]

Longsight/Levenshulme.

[Giggles]

Limerick. Full of backwards cunts speaking some form of primitive language.

Been out in it recently since the sister moved there. It's fucking brutal.

[Spikey M]

Limerick. Full of backwards cunts speaking some form of primitive language.

Rephrase this in the form of a limerick or gtfo.

[Spikey M]

Been out in it recently since the sister moved there. It's fucking brutal.

And you.

[Spikey M]

Limerick is a bit shit,
Giggles got out of there quick,
The locals all frown,
the water is brown,
Even for Ireland they’re thick

[Spoonsky]

"I'll write a poem!" said Spikey
(To prove that he wasn't a pikey)
Spikey GTFO
Your rhyme caused such woe
That old ItalAussie said, "Crikey!"

[Giggles]

'A Limerick' only exists in the USA, sorry.

[Dark Soldier]

Limerick is full of sket cunts,
Their fannies are more like a gunt,
Your cock shrivels inside,
Your libido instantly dies,
But eight pints later you think "she's worth a punt"

[Giggles]

One thing about Limerick is that if you got on the wrong side of them boys then you'd want to have a nice high pain threshold. The brother in law went to school with a guy that got the wire. Heard of it before myself in Lurgan and it'd always keep a mickey in check.

[Dark Soldier]

Yeah an ex was from there, we went over and I met her family. Her dad barely smiled or said a word and looked like he'd decapitate me for being English and her bro was about six foot six and 20 stone of muscle, lovely bloke but he could've ended me with ease.

[Boydy]

One thing about Limerick is that if you got on the wrong side of them boys then you'd want to have a nice high pain threshold. The brother in law went to school with a guy that got the wire. Heard of it before myself in Lurgan and it'd always keep a mickey in check.

What?

What is the wire and what is a mickey?

[Lewis]

I say we take the van to Limerick and sort a few of these spud-faced fuckers out.

[Spikey M]

I say we take the van to Limerick and sort a few of these spud-faced fuckers out.

Mate, IN LIMERICK STYLE OR GTFO.

[Lewis]

Bog-trotting wannabes. They would get one look at us lads and see their arse.

[Queenslander]

Gold Coast

[Giggles]

What?

What is the wire and what is a mickey?

Copper pipe up arse as far as it'll go, barbed wire into copper pipe, pull out copper pipe.

A mickey is a penis.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Yeah an ex was from there, we went over and I met her family. Her dad barely smiled or said a word and looked like he'd decapitate me for being English and her bro was about six foot six and 20 stone of muscle, lovely bloke but he could've ended me with ease.

Wasn't that at the time when your knees were held together by velcro? Wouldn't have taken much to end you.

[Boydy]

Jesus christ.

[Giggles]

Jesus christ.

They're animals. I always knew that one as a Lurgan special until I knew all the knackers did it.

[Dark Soldier]

Wasn't that at the time when your knees were held together by velcro? Wouldn't have taken much to end you.

Top half was God tier mate. Coulda launched a knock out from the floor.

[Magic]

What?

What is the wire and what is a mickey?

I'm guessing it's para related and Mick cunt.

[Giggles]

I'm guessing it's para related and Mick cunt.

Travellers. And expect nothing less from a jock bastard, you're all rotten cunts

[Magic]

Same thing.

[Giggles]

Same thing.

In that both would skin you, I hope so.

[Magic]

Of course. There are horrible cunts everywhere doesn't mean everyone is.

[Giggles]

Of course. There are horrible cunts everywhere doesn't mean everyone is.

Except in Scotland. Just a bad attitude of person, the lot of the cunts.

[Kikó]

Actually a lot of the parts of Paris and Rome are proper cesspits.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Venice.

[Bam]

Venice is stunning, did you walk around with shite in your eyes?

[Disco]

Some of it is, a significant part of it is a festering hole.

[Kikó]

Kiev - bandit country.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Venice is stunning, did you walk around with shite in your eyes?

Too many tourists, it smells, having to use water taxis, narrow alleys etc etc.

Some of it is indeed stunning but on the whole, it's shit.

[Spikey M]

I don’t think we can conflate being shit with being a shithole.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

The place stinks and it's rammed with tourists.

The good bits don't save it, it's a shithole.

[ItalAussie]

Gold Coast

Is pretty terrible. Have you been to Rockhampton? That's the top of my Australian list.

Nottingham is the top of my worldwide list. Just the worst.

[-james-]

Just remembered that I've been to Dunfermline a few times. Irredeemable.

[mugbull]

Drove through LA’s skid row one time at night. Definitely that.

[Queenslander]

Is pretty terrible. Have you been to Rockhampton? That's the top of my Australian list.

Nottingham is the top of my worldwide list. Just the worst.

Rockhampton is an embarrassing place to visit. The Gold Coast is a place where most social areas I have to worry about getting stabbed and or king hit at any time time of day.

EDIT: Gold Coast Cops

https://www.youtube.com/user/mrtechnoligy100

[Kikó]

I think my cousins live in Rockhampton actually. :D

[Lewis]

We need the term 'king hit' in this country.

[Queenslander]

We call it coward punch now I just forgot.