SOOOO err like ifya had to be...errr...an ANIMAL, what animal would you be yeah?

[Spikey M]

And why?

[Baz]

A fit widows cat.

I’d be all she had left.

[SincereTheRebel]

Being top of the food chain like i am now. So probably a lion or some type of eagle.

[Giggles]

I'd live with the smaller cock size to be a horse.

[Shindig]

Maybe a shark? Who fucks with a shark?

[Samadini]

Honey Badger, because I eat stuff I know I shouldn't eat and end up passing out, then doing it all over again the next day.

[Henry]

A wolf, obviously. Wolves are cool.

[Ian]

I suppose I'd be relegated to being a panda because they are also fat, useless and never get any.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

I'm more sloth than anything else but I'd like to be a lion or a bear.

[Jimmy Floyd]

I'd be King Louie. It strikes me that, despite lacking man's red fire, he has a pretty good deal in life.

[Mazuuurk]

Lions seem like they have pretty decent lives really. Maybe eagle, because flying seems cool.

[McAvennie]

I'd like to be a lion pride leader, in reality I'm more like an orangutan

[Dark Soldier]

a fuckin spider mate i've always wanted eight legs who hasn't

[randomlegend]

Is that cus the two you've got are so shit?

[phonics]

Who wants to be a Lion? Prowling the prairie on your own for days at a time and a shag once every couple of years if you're lucky.

Sliverback Gorilla all day if you want a king of the jungle type, all day.

[Dark Soldier]

Is that cus the two you've got are so shit?

they'd kick ur fuckin skull off ya weedy shitecunt neck m8

god bless

[randomlegend]

<3

[Lewis]

Most animals seem to have pretty crap lives, so maybe one of those massive protected tortoises.

[Pepe]

Pretty much all of them are at the subsistence level. So you have to decide whether you live in a shithole and have to spend six months freezing and/or without food or you live in abundance, where you will have to worry about being eaten by something larger everyday. Home pet is probably the best option.

[Spoonsky]

Obviously a bird.

[Pepe]

Gay lol.

[Spoonsky]

That would be trans, I think.

But seriously, imagine catching the wind and just soaring over everything hundreds of feet below. It would be amazing.

[Pepe]

Flying does look cool. I'd take one of the big, fast ones that eat meat though. None of those puny bug eaters.

Then again, we have hang-gliders and stuff.

[phonics]

Pretty much all of them are at the subsistence level. So you have to decide whether you live in a shithole and have to spend six months freezing and/or without food or you live in abundance, where you will have to worry about being eaten by something larger everyday. Home pet is probably the best option.

Yeah tbh the only good answer is dog.

[Disco]

It's uplifting to see that the mentally ill are able to join in things like this.

[phonics]

Woof.

[ItalAussie]

Something that could fly, but wouldn't have to worry about food scarcity. So not a condor, despite the appeal of cruising around the mountains. Albatross has a certain appeal, but flying over the ocean would be dull compared to somewhere more interesting. Maybe some kind of eagle.

If we're restricting it to land animals, I'd want to be near the top of the food chain, but not in a food-scarce predator situation either. It's a tricky one. Maybe a jaguar? The rainforest is bustling with things to eat, I reckon. That or possibly one of the more temperate omnivore bears, like a grizzly bear.

[Spoonsky]

How could I have forgotten (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Blobfish)? :cool:

[Spikey M]

Something that could fly, but wouldn't have to worry about food scarcity. So not a condor, despite the appeal of cruising around the mountains. Albatross has a certain appeal, but flying over the ocean would be dull compared to somewhere more interesting. Maybe some kind of eagle.

If we're restricting it to land animals, I'd want to be near the top of the food chain, but not in a food-scarce predator situation either. It's a tricky one. Maybe a jaguar? The rainforest is bustling with things to eat, I reckon. That or possibly one of the more temperate omnivore bears, like a grizzly bear.

Problem is you get hunted by toothless locals if you’re a Grizzly bear or anything else good.

[ItalAussie]

Problem is you get hunted by toothless locals if you’re a Grizzly bear or anything else good.

Hunting is a problem for any large mammal. Predators and animals in drought regions have to worry about food scarcity. I'm sticking with jaguar, as being a predator in a food rich environment seems ideal. Hunters still a possibility, but nothing compared to African big game animals or North American mammals.

Or maybe something long-lived and super-protected, like the Galapagos tortoise, that live to over a hundred. Or those Japanese macaques that relax in the hot springs. I'd imagine they have plenty of food, too. That's a half-decent shout.

[Ian]

What were those big rodenty things on Planet Earth 2 that got out of their pit every morning just to go and sunbathe? They seemed to have a pretty good deal, even if they eventually get eaten by something.

[phonics]

There's also the Capybara who just seem to be bros with everyone

https://static.boredpanda.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2016/04/capybara-unusual-animal-friendship-fb__700-png.jpg

[Ian]

That octopus who choked out a shark before MacGyvering itself some armour on Blue Planet was a bit of a hero too.

[niko_cee]

Hunting is a problem for any large mammal. Predators and animals in drought regions have to worry about food scarcity. I'm sticking with jaguar, as being a predator in a food rich environment seems ideal. Hunters still a possibility, but nothing compared to African big game animals or North American mammals.


I reckon you're definitely on to something with the jaguar, plus you'd have one of the coolest finishing moves of any (proper) animal.

That said, they are very endangered, so their lives can't be that great.