What is your dream job?

[Offshore Toon]

Footballer, (successful) musician, porn star etc. aside, what job do you think would fit you perfectly?

There was a period a few years ago where me and my mate(s) would go for drives and we'd always stop off at one of the Waitroses on the island. I've always quite liked going shopping, but this took it to extreme levels. In second year there was a Waitrose down the road and I managed to get my uni mate into it as well. Its dawned on me since that I'd love to run a supermarket or be involved in the process with a hands-on type role, but obviously my ambitions are greater than sitting at the till or stacking shelves. Marks & Spencer were at the careers fair this year and I had a good chat with them, so once I'm done I think I'm going to try and worm my way into M&S or Waitrose through an office role/graduate scheme and begin on my journey.

[Spikey M]

I wanted to be an archaeologist as a kid, then I found out it was just dicking about with pots and that was it. I've never had a realistic dream since then.

Don't mind me, just off to end it all.

[Offshore Toon]

I wanted to be an archaeologist as a kid, then I found out it was just dicking about with pots and that was it. I've never had a realistic dream since then.

Don't mind me, just off to end it all.
I entertained the idea of archaeologist as well, but then my mum told me I'd be 'married to the job' and have no life so I knew it wouldn't suit me.

[Giggles]

Lottery winner. I'd never work a day again in my life if I didn't have to.

[randomlegend]

Footballer, (successful) musician, porn star etc. aside, what job do you think would fit you perfectly?

There was a period a few years ago where me and my mate(s) would go for drives and we'd always stop off at one of the Waitroses on the island. I've always quite liked going shopping, but this took it to extreme levels. In second year there was a Waitrose down the road and I managed to get my uni mate into it as well. Its dawned on me since that I'd love to run a supermarket or be involved in the process with a hands-on type role, but obviously my ambitions are greater than sitting at the till or stacking shelves. Marks & Spencer were at the careers fair this year and I had a good chat with them, so once I'm done I think I'm going to try and worm my way into M&S or Waitrose through an office role/graduate scheme and begin on my journey.

Either Lidl or Aldi (forget which) are meant to have an absolutely bitching graduate scheme. I know it's no M+S/Waitrose but presumably once you're a management don you can move companies.

I've decided to finish medicine whilst starting a chocolate business on the side and hopefully grow it over time to the point where that's what I'll do full time. That is my dream job.

Currently in the process of getting my mum's kitchen hygiene approved and all the other boring admin shit and then I'm going to have a go at doing a craft fair. Plan is to do a 'collection' based on best of Norfolk/east of England produce. Think that will go well with the craft fair market and also be quite fun sourcing ingredients and getting in touch with nearby producers. Got quite a few flavour ideas that I need to have a go at and get as good as possible, but at the same time it's difficult to practice too much as it's expensive.

[summsuccess]

I just wanted to be my own boss and Ive done that but I always thought i would earn more
I think the older I got the less motivated by money and more by helping the young lads but its not a handsome salary by any means

I love in hope that if Colonel Sanders managed it when he was in his 60s then I have plenty of time on my side.

[Offshore Toon]

Either Lidl or Aldi (forget which) are meant to have an absolutely bitching graduate scheme. I know it's no M+S/Waitrose but presumably once you're a management don you can move companies.

I've decided to finish medicine whilst starting a chocolate business on the side and hopefully grow it over time to the point where that's what I'll do full time. That is my dream job.

Currently in the process of getting my mum's kitchen hygiene approved and all the other boring admin shit and then I'm going to have a go at doing a craft fair. Plan is to do a 'collection' based on best of Norfolk/east of England produce. Think that will go well with the craft fair market and also be quite fun sourcing ingredients and getting in touch with nearby producers. Got quite a few flavour ideas that I need to have a go at and get as good as possible, but at the same time it's difficult to practice too much as it's expensive.
Glad to hear you're carrying on with medicine. It'll be good to get it done.

Yeah, I think the sensible thing to do would be apply to every supermarket and see what comes my way. I imagine the M&S/Waitrose vibe would suit me more than ALDI/LIDL, but I'm only basing these supposed vibes from the type of atmosphere in the supermarkets so its likely nonsense.

If I manage to get into food sourcing I'll try and flood the shopfloor with your chocolate.

I just wanted to be my own boss and Ive done that but I always thought i would earn more
I think the older I got the less motivated by money and more by helping the young lads but its not a handsome salary by any means

I love in hope that if Colonel Sanders managed it when he was in his 60s then I have plenty of time on my side.
Yeah, it took me too long to realise you need to focus on what you enjoy instead of money.

[Adamski]

Glad to hear you're carrying on with medicine. It'll be good to get it done.

Yeah, I think the sensible thing to do would be apply to every supermarket and see what comes my way. I imagine the M&S/Waitrose vibe would suit me more than ALDI/LIDL, but I'm only basing these supposed vibes from the type of atmosphere in the supermarkets so its likely nonsense.

If I manage to get into food sourcing I'll try and flood the shopfloor with your chocolate.

Yeah, it took me too long to realise you need to focus on what you enjoy instead of money.

That's just something poor people say Offy.

[summsuccess]

He lives with Chinese people so ofcourse he is poor compared to them.
I bet his neighbours are triads which is why he doesnt want to knock
Do it Offshore. Bang on the door and tell them who you are and what you are about. They will either pay you protection money or use you in the soup later.

[randomlegend]

'Work out what you love and find a way to get paid for it' always seems a nice way to think about things, even if it is a bit flouncy.

[randomlegend]

If I manage to get into food sourcing I'll try and flood the shopfloor with your chocolate.

LAD

:cool:

[Adamski]

I thought you didn't make chocolate?

[randomlegend]

Good catch, sort it out offshore.

[Adamski]

I've decided to finish medicine whilst starting a chocolate business on the side

Get this plonker in line as well, while you're at it.

[summsuccess]

Get this plonker in line as well, while you're at it.

He meant medication.

[randomlegend]

There's no good way to word that though.

Chocolates making business? No, I don't make chocolate.

Chocolatiererereringering business? I guess, but it sounds retarded.

The business is primarily concerned with chocolate so I'm swinging for that. It's making the best of a bad situation.

[Jimmy Floyd]

The business is primarily concerned with chocolate

Don't listen to the haters. I believe in miracles.

[summsuccess]

Chocolate fudge packer?

[randomlegend]

Don't listen to the haters. I believe in miracles.

Probably showing my position on the spectrum, but no idea what you're getting at.

[John]

Probably showing my position on the spectrum, but no idea what you're getting at.

Where you from?

[randomlegend]

Where am I from? Geographically?

[Jimmy Floyd]

You sexy thing.

[randomlegend]

Fuck's sake :D

[Spikey M]

You sexy idiot.

[Adamski]

You sexy thing.

Literally the last member of the board I'd expect that to come from :D

[randomlegend]

You sexy idiot.

Fuck's sake :(

[summsuccess]

lol you lot are too funny sometimes.

[Offshore Toon]

That's just something poor people say Offy.
I was making a great wage at RBS and it was still shit. The wage probably made it worse, actually, since I was getting stupidly drunk every weekend. Having the thought of a job you hate looming over you constantly is something I'm going to fight against as much as possible. If I compare this past 8 months of being ridiculously skint to the year beforehand working at HSBC, I realise that I don't need much money at all to be happy. I also make much better life choices as a poor bastard.

Good catch, sort it out offshore.
Accept the contract or do one.

Radio presenter / session drummer. I do massively regret not chasing one of them dreams. Got to money hungry when I was 18/20 pulling 35k a year commission. Fuck money is basically my thoughts these days.
Having presented a student radio show this year, it really is difficult to keep the waffle going whilst maintaining self-respect. I'd like to be involved in radio, but being one of the main outlets of family friendly entertainment is hard.

[summsuccess]

How old are you Offshore? I thought you were just in university so had you down as 18/20 or a mature student. I didnt know you had worked too.

[Offshore Toon]

26. Worked from 17 to 22, then did a year at college before coming to university at 23, but took a year out last year to work and make some money again. All my experience is in finance but I that's the last place I want to end up.

[summsuccess]

26. Worked from 17 to 22, then did a year at college before coming to university at 23, but took a year out last year to work and make some money again. All my experience is in finance but I that's the last place I want to end up.

Well done. It will install some great traits. I dont read the university thread but I take it its all in there what youre doing?

[Offshore Toon]

Yep, that's the one.
Our situations are/were probably very similar. I eat to avoid working and because I've had a shit day most days I don't bother to do any exercise in the evening, which leads to some incredible weight gain, but I don't care because my soul has been destroyed by the Jews upstairs.

Well done. It will install some great traits. I dont read the university thread but I take it its all in there what youre doing?
Some bits and bobs. I don't post too much about it since this a #banter zone primarily.

[Pepe]

Faculty position at a 4-year college.

[Pepe]

Or maybe something in politics.

[nsd]

Maybe some kind of dog trainer or other dog-related vocation. I'm really not sure though, and I have no clue what I want from life. So for now I'm stuck spending my nights wiping old folks arses for minimum wage.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Running a cheese shop. The cheese that gets bought in supermarkets appals me, it's yellow plastic and has no flavour. I need to take the world's greatest foodstuff to the people.

[Kikó]

Running a cheese shop. The cheese that gets bought in supermarkets appals me, it's yellow plastic and has no flavour. I need to take the world's greatest foodstuff to the people.

A friend of a friend of mine sells cheese. The good stuff as well and they were looking for people the other day to sell the brand. Could be you JF.

[niko_cee]

Supermarket grad schemes generally see you doing a lot of work on the shop floor (from shelf stacking to night shifts), and the managerial positions are ripe for ex-military types seeing as they don't really require any particular (professional) skills. Avoid.

[Lewis]

Administrator on The Third Half dot co dot UK.

[Offshore Toon]

Or maybe something in politics.
I've considered politics in Jersey. Its basically a popularity contest then a case of not fucking up too bad/keeping your mouth shut, though I would like to think I'd be able to 'make a difference'.

Running a cheese shop. The cheese that gets bought in supermarkets appals me, it's yellow plastic and has no flavour. I need to take the world's greatest foodstuff to the people.
I might get a TTH food market on the go. We can travel the world.

[Offshore Toon]

Supermarket grad schemes generally see you doing a lot of work on the shop floor (from shelf stacking to night shifts), and the managerial positions are ripe for ex-military types seeing as they don't really require any particular (professional) skills. Avoid.
The former surprises me, though I guess you should get to know what its like on the shop floor so it makes sense and I think you'd want to do that anyway if you were running one. As sad as it sounds, there's no other industry that I want to get into at the moment. Sure, something might pop up, but I look on job sites and all the roles sound the same so I don't really know where to look for inspiration (except for into my heart, obvs).

[Adamski]

I was making a great wage at RBS and it was still shit. The wage probably made it worse, actually, since I was getting stupidly drunk every weekend. Having the thought of a job you hate looming over you constantly is something I'm going to fight against as much as possible. If I compare this past 8 months of being ridiculously skint to the year beforehand working at HSBC, I realise that I don't need much money at all to be happy. I also make much better life choices as a poor bastard.


Joking aside, that is a really good point. I jumped from a relatively cushty, semi well paid job into a much higher paid job in the web/product development sector which I had absolutely no knowledge of. I went from 9-5 easy street to 7.30 - 7pm most days and being pestered on weekends. The Sunday dread was very very real so extra money isn't work it at all. In saying that, I learned more in 2 years there than I would have in 5 in the previous one so I wouldn't say I regretted it.

Money definitely doesn't equally happiness, the key for me was to try and carve out a niche where you enjoy your job, you're happy with your salary but most importantly you have your work > life balance at a good ratio.

[Magic]

Plugging phones in.

[Magic]

What would you say the ideal wage is? I was on 40k a year which was great but I don't really spend money so it was just going into savings. I'm now on 25k and that isn't enough, specially now a kids on the way. I think 30k would be ideal so the job isn't too stressful but still enough so my missus can go part time.

I was on 25k when the missus went part time. You'll cope.

[Adamski]

It kind of depends what your lifestyle is for me. I like to go out and do things most weekends whether it's eating out, nights out, things with my daughter or just nights away, so I spend a bit more than most people would on that side of things. I also like travelling so again that's another cost. I'm probably a lot better off than I think I am financially as I'm still paying off my wedding/honeymoon/house debts at the moment.

I've got a mate who earns less than me, he's married with a kid, nice house, doesn't want for anything but as he doesn't really go out as much or do as many things he's quite happy getting by on less rather than going for a higher paid job say, that might skew his work life balance or make him unhappy.

[Magic]

Need money to buy all those passive tablets/netflix etc for the kid eh?

[Adamski]

This is so poor :D But if it's giving you the tiniest bit of happiness posting it then that's OK with me :)

[Magic]

This is sad but I'm actually genuinely smiling now. I love this place.

Oh well, back to reality:

https://media.giphy.com/media/mjHAiGEBgFBKM/giphy.gif

[Adamski]

Footballer, (successful) musician, porn star etc. aside, what job do you think would fit you perfectly?

There was a period a few years ago where me and my mate(s) would go for drives and we'd always stop off at one of the Waitroses on the island. I've always quite liked going shopping, but this took it to extreme levels. In second year there was a Waitrose down the road and I managed to get my uni mate into it as well. Its dawned on me since that I'd love to run a supermarket or be involved in the process with a hands-on type role, but obviously my ambitions are greater than sitting at the till or stacking shelves. Marks & Spencer were at the careers fair this year and I had a good chat with them, so once I'm done I think I'm going to try and worm my way into M&S or Waitrose through an office role/graduate scheme and begin on my journey.

Just realised I never actually answered the main point of the thread. My dream job would be having a street food truck I think. There's loads of them popping up in Glasgow just now and various little festivals happening in and around the city on a weekly basis at the moment. Would be really cool to do.

[Jimmy Floyd]

'Street food' lost its lustre for me when I saw some bunch of Albanians in London doing the preparation rather literally - chopping their onions on the actual pavement.

[-james-]

If the cheese shop near where I live is anything to go by, you would have to live with the pungence of the stuff permeating your being forever. You'd probably acclimatise to it and be oblivious as well.

[Adamski]

'Street food' lost its lustre for me when I saw some bunch of Albanians in London doing the preparation rather literally - chopping their onions on the actual pavement.

Haha, you've probably reached saturation point in London to be fair. We're only really seeing the council relax the laws on actual street food trading now so it's going to get bigger here I think. Most of it is food festival based at the moment.

[-james-]

I like what I do a lot, probably because it doesn't really seem like work. The best bit about it not being told what to do by anyone. I was always bad at "teamwork".

I'd like to run a pub or something later, maybe one that puts on good music or serves good sushi, though I gather both of those things are pretty difficult to do profitably.

[Jimmy Floyd]

'Alright Dave, pint of the usual?'
'Nah, mate, something a bit different today. I was wondering if you could rustle me up a sashimi platter, and some sort of tasteless rice wine?'

[-james-]

Daves not welcome

[phonics]

I'd like to do what I do but at a bigger 'brand' with a larger team. Doing something like VICE documentaries without the wankery.

I'd also like to own by own bar where I could put gigs on but only if I was so outrageously rich I wouldn't care about making money back and just book acts I want to see to perform.

[Offshore Toon]

Joking aside, that is a really good point. I jumped from a relatively cushty, semi well paid job into a much higher paid job in the web/product development sector which I had absolutely no knowledge of. I went from 9-5 easy street to 7.30 - 7pm most days and being pestered on weekends. The Sunday dread was very very real so extra money isn't work it at all. In saying that, I learned more in 2 years there than I would have in 5 in the previous one so I wouldn't say I regretted it.

Money definitely doesn't equally happiness, the key for me was to try and carve out a niche where you enjoy your job, you're happy with your salary but most importantly you have your work > life balance at a good ratio.
Yeah, all true. I don't actually mind working hard/longer hours as long as I enjoy what I'm doing. If there's a physical/on-your-feet element to it then I won't get tired, where as with sitting all day staring at a screen my mind starts to shut down (you've probably guessed from my posting). That's something I'm trying to think about, as well. Most well-paid jobs I see seem to be office jobs and I cba with that.

[Lewis]

Me and my friend went in town a couple of weeks ago and ran straight into a 'street food' festival, so everywhere was rammed thanks to idiots forking out six quid for cheese toasties (actual cheese toasties) and then loitering around like zombies trying to eat molten cheese without burning their mouths to bits.

[Offshore Toon]

There's one in Jersey that's amazing. Was run by some tart that left a Michelin star restaurants to serve lunch to office workers. She seemed happy enough and the food was incredible for the price.

[Abelxaviersdodgyhairdo]

I wanted to be an archaeologist as a kid, then I found out it was just dicking about with pots and that was it. I've never had a realistic dream since then.

Don't mind me, just off to end it all.

Not quite an archaeologist but close enough in that I wanted to be a paleontologist although it quickly dawned on me after leaving high school that it was never going to happen and after maybe six months or thereabouts I decided to leave college to go and find a full time job. I've never had a realistic dream since then either but I do think about it a lot and wonder where I would be in life if I had persevered.

[Adamski]

There's one in Jersey that's amazing. Was run by some tart that left a Michelin star restaurants to serve lunch to office workers. She seemed happy enough and the food was incredible for the price.

As I said, we've got quite a lot of them at the moment. This is the one I was at at the weekend:

http://www.glasgowlive.co.uk/whats-on/food-drink-news/big-feed-street-food-market-12767678

Some of the food :drool:

[Offshore Toon]

Some wanker has one of those prosecco trucks in Jersey as well.

https://www.facebook.com/pg/TheChuggingPig/photos/?ref=page_internal

That's the hooker I was talking about. Pictures don't really do it justice, but for £4.50-£5 a meal it was great.

[Boydy]

I have no idea what my dream job is.

[Jimmy Floyd]

I'm sure I've posted before about my old colleague Dele who, in his youth, had a job 'sleeping on beds'. In other words he tested new bed designs. Rocked up with his pyjamas at the bed shop at 10pm, slept on the bed, filled in a form in the morning to rate various aspects of his sleeping experience, and off he went.

Literally a dream job.