Name of the Year 2017

[John]

After having a great time with some of the names in the NFL draft a while back, I've been keeping an eye on America for some of the better nonsense names and this year I've discovered there's an actual bracketed competition with the best names, largely of sportspeople but anyone can 'enter', and it's made my year immeasurably better. The site doing it swears these are all real, and some cursory Googling backs that up.

https://i.gyazo.com/69a36c3f9ec0c912b8fe5ceae7f701fb.png

Early favourites are 'Boats Botes', 'YourMajesty Lumpkins', and 'Aphrodite Bodycomb', but they're all amazing and I haven't giggled quite so much in a while.

[Disco]

I like to think the parents of Rushmore Cervantes were Soul Calibur fans.

[Mazuuurk]

Marmaduke Trebilcock :D

[John]

I've been trying to work out Jeffrosenberg Tan. It has the sound of a really oblivious Asian family trying to give their kid a typical 'American' name and getting it wrong, but I'm not sure you could be oblivious enough to give your kid a full name as a first name and still be able to raise them successfully enough to have someone on the internet find out about them. It could be a really lol piece of hippy fandom, like noted Brazilian UFC man John Lineker.

Andy Brandy Casagrande IV was one of those I Googled, because if that's real then there are no rules anymore, and it turns out he's a camera operator on shark documentaries. That seems understandable, if you're from a family with three other Andy Brandy Casagrandes.

[John Arne]

Things like this make you understand why NZ has a pre-approved list of names.

[John]

They did that because people were calling their kids things like Sex Fruit or Number 42 Bus. Their system can fuck right off if it'd deny any of those.

[wullie]

I've been a Kobe Buffalomeat man since his college days.

[Ian]

Spoke to a member of our IT department in Bangalore on Monday whose name is Tarzan Stalin. He turns up on Google. Strong name.

[Offshore Toon]

Saw a bank application at work once for a bloke called Dick Beard. Passport was Richard Beard, but I like that he preferred being Dick Beard.

[Adamski]

Had a pension application in a previous job for a Mr Roger Mashiter which is probably funnier in a Scottish accent.

[Ian]

Here he is. The man, the myth, the legend:
https://in.linkedin.com/in/stalin-tarzan-42390890
https://www.techgig.com/tarzanstalin2

He should probably update his LinkedIn.

[John Arne]

I had a Japanese customer with the fairly common surname 'Takeshita". Always made me giggle.

[Shindig]

YourMajesty Lumpkins sounds like a pantomime dame. I'll repeat that my best name seen at work was a deed poll effort, 'King James Xclusiv.'

[Samadini]

In my job I have to go through thousands of 16-19 year olds records and come across some absolutely awful names that parents are giving their kids. They aren't as humorous as some of those above, they're just outright shit, like Chel.C.Lea which is all one name, the 'C' doesn't stand for anything. There's one called Twinkle too.

The other day I found one called Branie Basted, which is going to be an absolute nightmare in school.

[Disco]

I struggled to keep a straight face when someone I worked with told me they called their daughter Kia Armani.

[Ian]

In my job I have to go through thousands of 16-19 year olds records and come across some absolutely awful names that parents are giving their kids. They aren't as humorous as some of those above, they're just outright shit, like Chel.C.Lea which is all one name, the 'C' doesn't stand for anything. There's one called Twinkle too.

The other day I found one called Branie Basted, which is going to be an absolute nightmare in school.

Remind me the one you don't me before which had about three cultures going on in the same name. Nigel Raj Gomes or something?

I liked this guy's name when I saw it on a list of daft ones:
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fair_Hooker

[igor_balis]

I get a lot at my place of work, but there's a certain timeless quality to the various Asian people with surnames that are euphemisms for penis.

[Samadini]

Remind me the one you don't me before which had about three cultures going on in the same name. Nigel Raj Gomes or something?

I liked this guy's name when I saw it on a list of daft ones:
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fair_Hooker


Yep, there's something about a 17 year old living in Norfolk called Nigel Raj Gomez that screams Don. :cool:

[Raoul Duke]

Spoke to a member of our IT department in Bangalore on Monday whose name is Tarzan Stalin. He turns up on Google. Strong name.

I had some burly Indian geezer in Bangalore called 'Jenifer' in one of my old teams. Top lad.

[Foe]

I had some burly Indian geezer in Bangalore called 'Jenifer' in one of my old teams. Top lad.

Know a couple of Donald Macdonald's and an Alexander Beaches who tends to prefer being called Sandy.

[Adamski]

Fuck off Foe :D

[Reg]

Know a couple of Donald Macdonald's and an Alexander Beaches who tends to prefer being called Sandy.
:D

Alpha McMath sounds like a nerdy counterpart to Max Power.