Midweek Fixtures for Maz - Champions and Europa League 15/16 March

[Reg]

All on BT. The Schalke game is on the Showcase channel.

Wednesday 19:45
Atlético Madrid v Bayer 04 Leverkusen
Monaco v Manchester City

Thursday 18:00
Besiktas v Olympiakos
FK Krasnodar v Celta Vigo
KRC Genk v KAA Gent

Thursday 20:05
Ajax v FC Copenhagen
Borussia Mönchengladbach v FC Schalke 04
Manchester United v FC Rostov
Roma v Lyon
RSC Anderlecht v Apoel Nicosia

[Pleb]

Maz :cool:

[Mazuuurk]

Merci :cool:

[Reg]

https://www.theguardian.com/football/2017/mar/15/jose-mourinho-pundits-paul-pogba-manchester-united-envy

He does have a... unique way of seeing things, doesn't he?

Meanwhile Lukaku has rejected a new 100k per week contract. United in the summer?

[Lewis]

That line about 'some pundits are in real trouble with their lives and need every coin to survive' seems a bit specific.

[Offshore Toon]

I'm more jealous of his brand management skills. I just can't compete.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Everyone knows John Terry is insolvent due to gambling debt, but Jamie 'Carra' Carragher and Frank 'Frankie' Lampard are surely in the clear.

[Lewis]

Maybe Gary Neville ruined himself building that eco-house, and Singapore hold it over him.

[Lewis]

Also, isn't it 'Lamps'?

[Jimmy Floyd]

That was more when he played. Now it's 'Ooh, Frankie Lampard, now he was a player'. Should really have been Frank 'Frankie Lampard' Lampard.

[Giggles]

Hopefully this is even half as good as the first leg.

[Reg]

Not a bad start! Must be a few more in this.

[Lewis]

Monaco against Barcelona would be good. Somebody like Juventus or Bayern would just lol at their naivety and win both legs 2-0, but one of these giant black lads kicking Luis Suarez up the arse all night is proper football.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Monaco :drool:

[Reg]

That's beautiful. Mendy must be one of the best crossers in the world.

[Magic]

Awesome scenes. Thousands of more goals here lads.

[Kikó]

Does Pep have what it takes to ...

[Shindig]

A rainy night in a French car park.

[Magic]

Loving this though I'd like to see City win the CL to lol at the scum.

[Lewis]

City shouldn't be thought of as an important club (let alone a Big Club) until they can provide somebody more glamorous than Richard Dunne for pundit duties.

[Lewis]

Putting this down to 'Pep' being too good a manager is some top, top crawling.

[Magic]

Jealous because you've got an even bigger myth?

[Reg]

Might as well sub Aguero, doesn't look like he'd score in another hour.

City have looked way better this half. Silva further forward and De Bruyne further back has made loads of difference.

[Magic]

Unless you properly park the bus sitting back never, ever works.

[Magic]

:D

Lol I love the CL

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Bakayoko \0/.

Get fucked City.

[Kikó]

Monaco will be french, you'll see.

[Reg]

Oh, City. It'll be an interesting summer for them because they aren't winning the league/CL with this defence.

[Lewis]

Everyone except Liverpool has an interesting summer ahead of them.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Monaco will be french, you'll see.

Monegasques are born with bottle.

Leicester saving the coefficient as you'd expect.

[Offshore Toon]

I fucking love it when Pep gets found it. Its been a good season in that regard.

[Giggles]

City are so fucking toothless. Desperate for a goal and created absolutely fuck all.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

:harold:

Get fucked Pep.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

http://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/football/39273148

Best record in 100 games though so 'Pep' is still covered in gold.

[Lewis]

Donaco. :cool:

[Giggles]

Dietmar Hamann has just said that if you concede 6 goals over two legs then you deserve to go out. Errrrrr.

[Kikó]

Hamann is a massive pisshead to be fair.

Leicester and United need to win both now to SAVE THE COEFFICIENT.

[Gray Fox]

Lolling ourselves into only 3 Champions League spots. But cases like this are worth it.

[Jimmy Floyd]

I think they might be bringing in 4 Champions League spots for us regardless of merit, which is basically akin to WWE.

[Reg]

That's from 18/19.

Although yeah we're guaranteed to have 4 clubs in it next season so it's in time I guess?

[Pen]

Are coefficients getting binned completely then?

[Jimmy Floyd]

Are coefficients getting binned completely then?

No, but the top 4 from the top 4 countries are getting into the group stage automatically. So you'd have to drop below Portugal or whoever is 5th. France.

And also this beauty:


Historical success in the competition will also be acknowledged in coefficient calculation (points for previous European titles with a weighted system for UEFA Champions League and UEFA Europa League titles)

Luckily Chelsea have won both :baz:

[Pen]

Ah, ok. That's shit but not as shit as at least there's a theoretical chance that any country could end up in the top four. The second bit however is complete horse shit.

[Offshore Toon]

Pulling up the ladder. :nono:

[Shindig]

Damn. I love it when big nations lose spots on Champ Man.

[Mazuuurk]

Was on a Draw and on over 3.5 yesterday. Ended up breaking even :moop:

[phonics]

Mbappe just became the first player called up by the national team to be born after the 98 World Cup. Madness. I'm old.

[phonics]

England team is out. Debutants/Surprises have been bolded.

Fraser Forster (Southampton), Joe Hart (Torino, on loan from Man City), Tom Heaton (Burnley); Ryan Bertrand (Southampton), Gary Cahill (Chelsea), Nathaniel Clyne (Liverpool), Phil Jones (Man Utd), Michael Keane (Burnley), Luke Shaw (Man Utd), Chris Smalling (Man Utd), John Stones (Man City), Kyle Walker (Tottenham); Dele Alli (Tottenham), Michail Antonio (West Ham), Ross Barkley (Everton), Eric Dier (Tottenham), Adam Lallana (Liverpool), Jesse Lingard (Man Utd), Jake Livermore (West Brom), Alex Oxlade-Chamberlain (Arsenal), Nathan Redmond (Southampton), Raheem Sterling (Man City), James Ward-Prowse (Southampton); Jermain Defoe (Sunderland), Marcus Rashford (Man Utd), Jamie Vardy (Leicester).

[Reg]

Pleased for Defoe. Should have been in ages ago. Pity he probably only got in due to Rooney, Sturridge and Kane being injured.

Not too inspiring in centre mid, is it? Dier sitting behind Barkley and Lallana maybe?

[John Arne]

Is Ashley Cole still knocking about somewhere?

[John]

John Stones. :D

He's going to wind up with a hundred caps and in twenty years be one of the answers you miss and ask 'fucking really?' about on a trivia question.

[Lewis]

Did you see him last night trying to blame the attackers? Fanny.

[Danny]

Is Ashley Cole still knocking about somewhere?

LA Galaxy.

Rose and Baines injured? Shaw in there is a laugh.

[Reg]

LA Galaxy.

Rose and Baines injured? Shaw in there is a laugh.
Is there anyone you'd play over him, though?

[SvN]

Every time there's a squad released, it appears to be the weakest ever. But that really is dogshit.

[phonics]

Jake Livermore being in there makes no sense to me. My Dad's a West Brom fan and I asked what his role in the team and what he does and it seems, he doesn't have one and not a lot.

[SvN]

I thought that for 3/4 of the squad, but couldn't think of a single person that I thought should be called up instead.

[Reg]

Hart
Walker - Jones - Cahill - Shaw
Dier
Barkley - Lallana
Sterling - Defoe - Rashford

Not a bad (possible) team but it does highlight the lack of depth when a few get injured.

[Lewis]

Leighton Baines would be more of a reputation pick than bench-bending Luke Shaw, because he was FOUND OUT at this level ages ago (and refusing push for a move when United and Bayern are interested marks him out as a mimsy who has no business in an England shirt).

But yeah lol at the state of that squad. We can't have been that average since the Graham Taylor era.

[John]

Who is this squad for games against? A front three of Defoe, Rashford, and Sterling managed by Gareth Southgate would all be booted into the eighth row of seating within about ten minutes by a competent defence.

[Pleb]

Rashford, Vardy up front for Germany I expect.

[Offshore Toon]

Germany? :D

[Pleb]

My fingers clearly didn't write "the" and "match" so please forgive the plebroll.

[Offshore Toon]

Was the last time England and Germany met when Heskey donned it 5-1?

[Disco]

No, the Lampard goal line thingy game at least.

[Samadini]

Donned them a year ago.


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WgIdNgzVDKk

[Ian]

You're not alone in wishing 2010 never happened, Offy, but sadly it did.

EDIT: Oh yeah, and that one.

[Samadini]

That Alli miss at 2-2 is so lol. He'll do that from the penalty spot in a tournament at some point.

[Offshore Toon]

Oh shit, yeah, England were gonna win the Euros.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Rostov have brought only 4 subs.

[Lewis]

Germany? :D


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XLV3d1qJ1Dk

Always worth posting.

[Lewis]

Paulp Ogba needs a week off.

[Disco]

Sven knew.

We have Albania on Wednesday, they are very dangerous....

[Giggles]

We should have capped Redmond when he was stuck at Norwich.

[Lewis]

I peaked when I tipped a Brazil vs Germany final for that World Cup, and everyone at school was giving it 'We beat them 5-1!' It's probably how I managed to brave the first year of 'Pep' Watch.

[SvN]

My highlight came when I predicted Paul Robison - who wasn't even getting a game at Leeds at the time - would be England number 1 within a year.

[Lewis]

I got Italy winning in 2006 right as well, but then I went with Brazil in 2010 and 2014 and they let me down big time.

[Raoul Duke]

This Utd game is bollocks.

[Kikó]

Massive steaming turd

[Raoul Duke]

Can we make an early call on 'game management' being the next bullshit buzzword phrase picked up by the masses next? I've heard it a few times recently.

[SvN]

This has got "Fellaini giving away an injury time penalty" written all over it.

[Raoul Duke]

Mata :drool:

[Magic]

:sick:

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

That was lovely though.

[Pen]

Didn't know eating during the game was allowed :D

[Kikó]

Besiktas, Celta Vigo, Genk, Ajax, Anderlecht, Schalke, United, Lyon.

[Pen]

Probably the best chance United will ever have to win this.

[Lewis]

United are always horrible in Germany, so I'm picking that as the shit draw.

[Pen]

Didn't United batter Schalke that year they somehow made it to he semifinals of the Champions league?

edit: The scorers :D http://www.uefa.com/uefachampionsleague/season=2011/matches/round=2000121/match=2007744/postmatch/report/index.html

[Lewis]

It was only 2-0 in Germany, and they had good players then.

[Reg]

Besiktas, Celta Vigo, Genk, Ajax, Anderlecht, Schalke, United, Lyon.
Jeez, that must be a lot weaker than most years. United's to lose.

[Lewis]

It's always weak. That time Chelsea won it they beat fucking Basel in the semi-final.

[Raoul Duke]

I'd love to get Anderlecht

[Yevrah]

Hart
Walker - Jones - Cahill - Shaw
Dier
Barkley - Lallana
Sterling - Defoe - Rashford

Not a bad (possible) team but it does highlight the lack of depth when a few get injured.

I look at that and just think 'flaky'.

[Ian]

They might be able to scrape together two or three backbones between the eleven of them.

[Shindig]

Liverpool's route to last year's final:

Sion, Rubin Kazan, Bordeaux, Augsburg, United, Dortmund, Villarreal.

Stronger than I anticipated.

[John Arne]

I went to that Sion game. Worst night of my life - I believe it triggered Bredan's dismissal.

[Raoul Duke]

You can't leave out Dele 'red-card-in-waiting' Alli

[Mellberg]

Leicester - Atletico

[Max Power]

We'll shit em.

At home second :nodd:

[ItalAussie]

Ah crap.

Welp, I guess we had to beat the good teams at some stage. I was just hoping to get one more easy ride.

[Mellberg]

Just beat them 4-0 in the first leg and you'll be fine.

[Waffdon]

Another final on the way for Simeone.

[John]

Monaco v Dortmund. :drool:

Ideal.

[Lewis]

That Roy Keane stuff is good. If Corporate Jose makes United good again before he combusts and gets sacked, their financial power should enable them to get by on bin men. Give him the job. :drool:

[Danny]

I enjoyed this more than I should have

842492296125997057

[Reg]

Some great ties. Shame there isn't one less of Juventus, Barcelona, Real and Bayern but still good.


You can't leave out Dele 'red-card-in-waiting' Alli
I forgot him for some reason. That means Barkley won't play. :cool:

[niko_cee]

What happened in the Huddersfield game for that amount of first half injury time? I flicked over expecting to see the back end of half time and saw obligatory Championship Chelsea loanee 'Tammy' (seriously?) Abraham scoring after 58 minutes, but still somehow in the first half.

Also, get in you beautiful Bristolian bastards.

[Giggles]

The BBC report mentions someone getting stretchered off after a 14 minute stoppage.

[Reg]

Someone apparently headbutted an opponent and got himself injured.

[Kikó]

Successful in the Europa league ballot. €45 per ticket. :cool:

[niko_cee]

I thought about having a punt on some of them but was put off by having to put in not only your own ID details but those of anyone else you wanted to buy tickets for as well.