Health and sickness. A place to moan.

[Magic]

No I don’t believe that was me.

100% a Baz alias.

[Kikó]

Elth

From facebook:
Hey dude! Yeah all good here, bit better than you guys with covid. How's life treating you?

:moop:

[niko_cee]

Was elth called Doug irl?

Doug the Grim? Nope.

I could never reconcile the pic he once posted either.

[Queenslander]

Ouch

[Baz]

Dave Challinor?In a bizarre turn of events, I [kinda] work with DC['s boss].

[Kikó]

Was elth called Doug irl?

Doug the Grim? Nope.

I could never reconcile the pic he once posted either.

Drew.

[Magic]

Mind DM? He's on my LinkedIn lolz. Prick.

[Kikó]

DM is on my Linkedin (or was a recommended person to connect to) for ages. Plus Brighton and Guido.

[Baz]

LinkedIn is Myspace for bellends.

[Spoonsky]

Christ my login still works. Agreed, appalling name.

Just a long time lurker now with no enthusiasm to post.

Long time lurker and haxball legend.

[Giggles]

Elth can lick the only rough bit of my sack that’s left.

[Spikey M]

A can of Stella appears to have slipped into Giggs' provisions for the night.

[phonics]

This is mostly paranoia from drugs but considering the Sincere thing I thought I’d ask.

My parents have both not been on WhatsApp since around the same time on Tuesday. I’m an only child that lives in another country. All their parents have passed but they both have a sibling. If they were to have got in a car crash or something. Would I have been informed somehow? I normally don’t speak throughout the week and just call them on a Sunday and now I’ve somehow paranoia’d myself in to thinking I could somehow be unaware of such a thing.

[Queenslander]

Can you just call them?

[phonics]

I got an email from one of them the other day. I just mean generally?

[Queenslander]

I would only be guessing

[Luca]

Their GP(s) probably have a next-of-kin on file. Depending on how efficient eHealth records are in the UK, the hospital could probably get those details fairly quickly. That's if they've nominated you as next-of-kin, of course...

[phonics]

I'd hope so but I can't rule out a Treehouse of Horror 7 style arrangement where it turns out despite the twin living in the attic and eating fishheads, it turns out i'm the evil one

[igor_balis]

Who was that bloke who left to make a "proper" fm forum? Nick?

[phonics]

I'm asking a genuine question and no-ones being helpful.

[Giggles]

Who was that bloke who left to make a "proper" fm forum? Nick?

Oh yeah I’d forgot about that. Is it still around?

[Baz]

Oh yeah I’d forgot about that. Is it still around?
It seems to have switched from vbulletin, like TTH, to some crappy free one: https://footballmanagernow.proboards.com/board/7/off-topic-discussion

Hardly thriving.

[Lewis]

I found it by Googling 'Shrewnaldo', and there seems to be a Twitter community for it in which @MerryGuido has eight-thousand followers.

[Baz]

I found it by Googling 'Shrewnaldo', and there seems to be a Twitter community for it in which @MerryGuido has eight-thousand followers.Guimenez is practically Twitter famous in FM circles. Seems to have zero actual life and just plays FM and tweets about it like it’s real and he’s David Moyes. Weirdly, people get well on board and also treat it like it’s real and get well invested in his regens and stuff. Very odd. Probably has “patreons” too, aka mugs who pay him for doing what he’d do anyway.

[phonics]

Hes getting paid more off FM tweets than you are spamming us with comission links. He's made himself a career.

[Lewis]

https://www.patreon.com/user?u=4625703

:gs:

[Giggles]

It seems to have switched from vbulletin, like TTH, to some crappy free one: https://footballmanagernow.proboards.com/board/7/off-topic-discussion

Hardly thriving.

That looks riddled.

[randomlegend]

Baz would have a Patreon in an instant if he had anything to offer.

[phonics]

Fucking hell even the doctor won't answer my question of 'will anyone tell me my parents are dead'

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Luca answered you ffs.

[Baz]

£38 a month career :drool:

[Lewis]

'West Bromwich Albion are saddened to announce the death of phonics' tenuous connection to the working class.'

[mugbull]

phonics are you on acid

[7om]

Christ phonics, lay off the ‘drugs’ and stop being a twat.

[Luca]

Christ phonics, lay off the ‘drugs’ and stop being a twat.

The former might actually be easier than the latter, I’m afraid.

[Kikó]

https://www.patreon.com/user?u=4625703

:gs:

He's basically mastered FM.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

I donned him SENSELESS in FM Live when that was a thing about 10 years ago.

[Lewis]

Why hasn't Football Manager got a market for people making money from it like every other popular game? Is it even as popular as it was when we played it?

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

It's not exactly a fun game to watch being streamed is it?

[Giggles]

Or to play any more.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Why hasn't Football Manager got a market for people making money from it like every other popular game? Is it even as popular as it was when we played it?

It sold two million last year which was apparently its highest ever. I imagine they have a pretty pokey setup compared to the big American/Asian studios so probably haven't got the infrastructure to deal with that (in before phonics tells me why I'm wrong about video games).

I don't know how it sells that much, it's about as accessible as the Fritzl family nursery.

[Lewis]

I'm thinking it's twice as many (or whatever) copies as they sold in 2007, but they rack up half as many man hours wasted on it. It doesn't seem to bleed into more mainstream things like it used to.

[Shindig]

You don't see them change their tech as much as they used to. CM1 was 1992-4, CM2 was 1995-1998, CM3 was 1999-2001. I feel like FM's been running the same stuff under the hood for close to a decade.

Speaking of the old shit, I picked up my old CM2 copies over the weekend from my parents'. Championship Manager 2 European Leagues was a weird thing. The leagues you were playing were up to date (1996/7) but outside of that, the rest of the world was in 1995.

[Giggles]

Got a spot thing on my back that's absolutely huge, endless jelly-like puss out of it. Don't think it's a cyst as it's not stinking though.

[randomlegend]

Cysts usually only smell bad if they're infected.

[Giggles]

Never smelled anything like the one I had on my hole before. Was like something had died.

[Giggles]

Still piles of stuff coming out of it daily. The gift that keeps on giving.

[Spikey M]

I used to work with someone that sat watching videos of shit like that. Get your webcam ready and you could make some money.

[randomlegend]

https://www.reddit.com/r/popping

[Dquincy]

Ffs. What is wrong with you.

[Shindig]

I tapped out as soon as I saw the bloke reliving a blood blister under his nail. :|

The greasy fucking perverts.

[Waffdon]

I’ve had hiccups for over an hour. Help

[Offshore Toon]

I’ve had hiccups for over an hour. Help

https://i.ibb.co/X7ZDfsZ/IMG-20210101-WA0074.jpg

[Don]

Why is it the fatboys have taken such a liking to me?

[Giggles]

Fucking hell it’s the shoe bomber.

[Don]

Yes, you dementia-ridden gammon.

[randomlegend]

I’ve had hiccups for over an hour. Help

Apparently digital rectal message is the only relatively well evidenced cure for hiccups.

[Shindig]

You don't think he's already tried that?

[Giggles]

That’s what started them in the first place.

[Waffdon]

You don't think he's already tried that?

Made it worse if anything. Gag reflex isn’t great

[7om]

Taz, where did it all go wrong, mate?

[Don]

I had a good vent earlier, you missed the action. I've showered off now and have realigned my chakras so suck me.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Just had an almighty back spasm/lockup when closing a door...

[Manc]

My lower back went the other week getting something out of the fridge. Deep heat patches are a must.

[Spikey M]

My lower back went the other week getting something out of the fridge. Deep heat patches are a must.

Did you lay down on the flaw afterwards?

[Manc]

I'll flaw you in a minute.

[Don]

The COVID toes struck today after a quiet few few weeks/months.

Googling seems to suggest it's Pompholyx (https://www.nhs.uk/conditions/pompholyx/). I've noticed one or two other skin issues since [likely] COVID infection, hopefully the new strains have people turning into actual lizards.

[-james-]

I had a root canal done about ten years ago, the dentist at the time said I might have trouble with the tooth in future. It started giving me jip a while back and apparently it needs another root canal.

Had one session, guy says it's not straightforward and I'll have to go back for him to have another look. Suspects he won't be able to do it himself and he'll have to refer me to an endodontist which I may or may not be able to get on the NHS. The other option is to just get it yanked. Not really keen on the latter, dunno, doesn't feel ideal losing a tooth before I hit 30.

Anyone had similar?

[Offshore Toon]

Should be getting a prescription for some medicinal at the end of the week. :huhu:

[Disco]

I had a root canal done about ten years ago, the dentist at the time said I might have trouble with the tooth in future. It started giving me jip a while back and apparently it needs another root canal.

Had one session, guy says it's not straightforward and I'll have to go back for him to have another look. Suspects he won't be able to do it himself and he'll have to refer me to an endodontist which I may or may not be able to get on the NHS. The other option is to just get it yanked. Not really keen on the latter, dunno, doesn't feel ideal losing a tooth before I hit 30.

Anyone had similar?

I had a tooth taken out a couple of years go, it was replaced with a permanent falsie and it's been fine. The extraction aftermath wasn't a lot of fun but that's apparently unusual as it took him an hour to get the thing out. Not exactly cheap either but given it solved the problem forever it was probably worth it.

[Don]

I saw this a couple weeks back and I haven't stopped thinking about it since.

https://cdn.entertainmentdaily.com/2020/08/15131018/katie-price-scary-teeth-main.jpg

Is that a bog-standard veneers job that all these muppets are doing? Fuck me.

[Baz]

Yeah. It's [one of the reasons] why I'll never get them.

[SincereTheRebel]

Is that the state of his real teeth on the left or do they have to do something to your teeth in preparation for the right image?

Cant they make the teeth in the right image look more "real"? They all look stupid.

[niko_cee]

They file them down into stumps to root the implants over. It's absolutely horrific.

Also, that's not a man.

[Baz]

Also, that's not a man.
1262026219886870528

[Lewis]

Ask him again now she's got a load of vulnerable kids.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Is that the state of his real teeth on the left or do they have to do something to your teeth in preparation for the right image?

Cant they make the teeth in the right image look more "real"? They all look stupid.

I believe they have them in different shades. I don't know why everyone goes for whiter than milk though.

[Manc]

That particular shade is known as The Firmino.

[SincereTheRebel]

They all look ridiculous.

[Spikey M]

Both kids managed to come down with sickness an diarrhea over night. I must have had about 2 hours sleep..

Close the schools.

[SincereTheRebel]

Bad food on the road or house?

[Spikey M]

Nah, a bug. Both have temperatures and a cough too. Would say nailed on Covid but the lateral flow tests the school gave us say not.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Covid doesn't include liquids does it? Maybe the Benfleet variant.

[Spikey M]

It's a symptom for kids but not for adults, for some reason.

https://www.google.com/amp/s/amp.theguardian.com/science/2020/sep/03/diarrhoea-and-vomiting-may-be-key-sign-of-covid-in-children-study

[Manc]

Bad food on the road or house?

Genetics.

[Spikey M]

Not sure this is the right thread for this really, but fuck it.

Do any of you guys have Insomnia? I've been struggling to get to sleep for a few weeks and it's starting to piss me off now.

Any decent supplements etc?

Alcohol works, but that's not a road I want to go too far down.

[Don]

Is this a recent development? If so, try and identify the variable that's affecting it. Your diet and exercise routine changed?

[Offshore Toon]

I stopped taking sleeping pills last Saturday and I'm doing surprisingly alright, although less so the last couple nights.

Melatonin works well to reset your sleeping pattern, though. Can get some off Life Extension but may take a little while as they're in Europe.

Otherwise I don't really feel there's any advice that actually works. Maybe go pick up some weed.

[Spikey M]

Is this a recent development? If so, try and identify the variable that's affecting it. Your diet and exercise routine changed?

There's no cause I can pinpoint. I just go through bouts of this sometimes but this bout is sticking around and it's giving me the arse ache.

I'm exercising the same as always, my stress levels are low and I'm otherwise fine and dandy. Sleep just will not come.

[igor_balis]

Not sure this is the right thread for this really, but fuck it.

Do any of you guys have Insomnia? I've been struggling to get to sleep for a few weeks and it's starting to piss me off now.

Any decent supplements etc?

Alcohol works, but that's not a road I want to go too far down.

valerian is actually pretty decent

[Offshore Toon]

If you're really desperate, you could try reading through Mahow's post history.

[-james-]

If the issue is switching your brain off, try an audiobook. It's been pretty great for my "sleep hygiene".

Zone into the words without necessarily listening to them; meditation for plebs basically I think. Been doing Anna Karenina for a while and I couldn't tell you the first thing about the plot.

[Offshore Toon]

I quite like listening to 5 Live as I know 99 times out of 100 I won't care what they're talking about and zone out.

[niko_cee]

I used to love a bit of 5live when the Up All Night show came on, dozing in and out of Rod somebody's dulcet tones as random news from across the Americas rolled in, ah those were the days.

Always a bit disappointing when it was Dotun Adebayo though.

[Boydy]

I simply will myself to sleep because I'm not a little bitch.

[Offshore Toon]

I used to love a bit of 5live when the Up All Night show came on, dozing in and out of Rod somebody's dulcet tones as random news from across the Americas rolled in, ah those were the days.

Always a bit disappointing when it was Dotun Adebayo though.
Waking up to Dr Karl. :cool:

[Spikey M]

I'm not a little bitch.

Come on lad...

[SvN]

I've suffered similarly most of my adult life. Every now and then - maybe every 3 months - I'll have a night where I just get zero sleep, and it completely ruins me. Alcohol definitely helps, but it's definitely not a long term solution.

[Boydy]

1328096605220843521

This went kinda viral a while ago and a lot of people said it worked. Probably worth a try.

[Lewis]

That sounds like his subconscious not wanting to associate with a nonce.

[mugbull]

Not sure this is the right thread for this really, but fuck it.

Do any of you guys have Insomnia? I've been struggling to get to sleep for a few weeks and it's starting to piss me off now.

Any decent supplements etc?

Alcohol works, but that's not a road I want to go too far down.

Melatonin is decent. I have had this problem a lot and honestly the best solution I've come up with besides alcohol is forcing yourself out of bed every 30 minutes or so if you can't sleep, for 5 minutes at a time. Sit somewhere else and read your Kindle. Or just walk around.

I used to have bad weeks where one night of no sleep made me anxious about falling asleep the next night, which made the night after that shit too, and so on...the problem was that I basically associated my bed with not falling asleep which is something you want to try to get rid of. Getting out of bed if you can't sleep helps a lot with that

[Don]

111 referred me to A&E for xrays. He's only gone and fractured it on the 17th May :happycry:

Find out on Thursday what the prognosis is but the brace will probably have to stay on for at least a week or 2 no doubt. Brutal setback. Mon the Indian variant.

[Boydy]

Fractured what? Your dick?

[Don]

Thumb. Mentioned it in the COVID thread. I tell you what though, A&E was quite efficient. Can't tell if it's because it was a Tuesday afternoon or the demand pipelines have been cleared or what but give 'em a clap.

[Boydy]

Oh, thought you were just angry about the clubs not being open yet or something.

[Foe]

We’re you a bit too vigorous in the sauna?

I thought those sorts of sauna clubs were a myth.

[Don]

They are not. Was legit thinking of hitting one up to welcome in the summer of love :drool:

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

That's grim.

[Foe]

Would be cheaper than heading to Ukraine, probably, if there’s a referral system.

[Manc]

Signed off by the Doc after anger/stress levels reached critical. Gave work ample opportunities to intervene which they chose not only to ignore, but basically laughed off, "dust yourself down and go again". You can understand why young men end up in the pits if that's a common reaction.

[Kikó]

Thumb. Mentioned it in the COVID thread. I tell you what though, A&E was quite efficient. Can't tell if it's because it was a Tuesday afternoon or the demand pipelines have been cleared or what but give 'em a clap.

I was in and out for my ankle for an hour recently. X-ray and a boot and I was on my way. Physio referral is four week later (and all virtual) isn't as good but still, the service has worked.

[Foe]

Signed off by the Doc after anger/stress levels reached critical. Gave work ample opportunities to intervene which they chose not only to ignore, but basically laughed off, "dust yourself down and go again". You can understand why young men end up in the pits if that's a common reaction.

It’s a horrible scenario really. I’ve seen it twice within my family where work has just overwhelmed someone to the point of resigning.

Companies will say they care about mental health and well-being, but they’re more interested in getting the job done.

Hope your time off lasts for over the euros. Free reign to doss about in the sun and watch football. :drool:

Hope it sorts you out, chief.

[Don]

Hold up, do we not share the same public sector employer, manc? What sort of manager have you been drawn with? I would have thought that shit would be treated deadly serious.

Kiko, is yours a sprain? No physical activity for a while too? This is grim, not least because I can barely do the dishes.

[Manc]

Kind words, Foe. Much love

We do indeed, Don. I've been drawn the short straw clearly. I should probably log a greivance, but I'm not the vindictive type.

[Kikó]

Hold up, do we not share the same public sector employer, manc? What sort of manager have you been drawn with? I would have thought that shit would be treated deadly serious.

Kiko, is yours a sprain? No physical activity for a while too? This is grim, not least because I can barely do the dishes.

Initially thought it was a fracture but the proper doctor looked at it and downgraded to a sprain. Thankfully not as immobile as I would have been. Haven't you got a dishwasher(missus)?

[Lewis]

We're going to need some background Manc because if you work where Taz works it sounds like you're one step off claiming for fibromyalgia.

[7om]

I thought Taz worked for a sports analytics company?

[Lewis]

Does he seem like someone who analyses sport for a living?

[Don]

Initially thought it was a fracture but the proper doctor looked at it and downgraded to a sprain. Thankfully not as immobile as I would have been. Haven't you got a dishwasher(missus)?

Close shave.

I'd almost forgotten about the dishwasher (not the missus, she's only here at weekends). I'll need to get some tablets for it tomorrow.


Does he seem like someone who analyses sport for a living?

:rasta:

7om, that was Taz. Don works with Manc.

[Boydy]

You use a dishwasher for just yourself and yet you moan about people letting the tap run when brushing their teeth?

[Don]

Is that aimed at Kiko? I don't use my dishwasher.

[Kikó]

Boydy is on the ropes here.

[randomlegend]

Aren't dishwashers meant to be more water/energy efficient than washing up provided you fill them up?

[Baz]

Fill her up with what? Gin? Jizz? :henn0rz:

[SincereTheRebel]

Quick story as i saw this thread and had a flashback.

So there was some type of water leak at my parent's house a few weeks ago that required digging holes through concrete. The workman did the work but they were not nice to communicate too. They said its policy now, that they can't replace the old nice brickwork. They can only black tarmac it off which would look shit.

When workman used to come to my parent's house, my dad used to always give the workmen herb because in his words, "You have to slow the white boys down". My mom never agreed with his methods. Usually, on the second day of the job. The workmen would correct all the mistakes they made from the herb, and would do a better job overall as an appreciation type of thing. If that makes sense. Hoping for more herb.

In this instance, I don't smoke but I did make them some fritters . In the end, they didn't tarmac off the multiple holes they left. Instead, they put the nice coloured concrete bricks back in there original setup. Sometimes it's better to be nice to people even if they don't start that way with you. Dads a legend :cool:

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

What sort of fritters?

[SincereTheRebel]

Supposed to go in the house thread :lol:

[Spikey M]

Just broke my thumb hammering this cunt (https://smile.amazon.co.uk/dp/B0045F3QAC/ref=cm_sw_r_tw_apa_glt_i_WB0419H6XHR5K8WBCFCB) into the ground. :moop:

[Baz]

PM me for an affiliate link before posting next time please

[Spikey M]

Just tripped up the stairs and whacked my ribs in the process. Hoping just bruised but this is genuinely horrific. Hurts just to breathe.

[Pepe]

Probably Covid.

[SincereTheRebel]

RL would have informed us before the fact if this happened yesterday.

[Luca]

Given his track record, he’ll probably tell you that your leg is broken, Spike.

[Kikó]

Just tripped up the stairs and whacked my ribs in the process. Hoping just bruised but this is genuinely horrific. Hurts just to breathe.

What do you want to us to do with your personal belongings?

[Spikey M]

Burn them in front of a charity shop.

[Manc]

Pulled a muscle in my back from a cold shower. Think that officially qualifies me as OLD.

[Don]

That causation sounds erroneous, please don't bring the name of cold showers into disrepute.

[Manc]

I converted to the lifestyle a long time ago. Must have been extra fresh this morning.

[Don]

Went swimming last week and the pressure of underwater seemed to cause some ear issues for a couple of days. Didn't think much of it but having got a jaw/throat pain develop yesterday and piecing together the added evidence of random nightsweats (which I'd passed off as remnants of COVID in my system), it seems I may have a case of an ear infection.

Have to ring GP tomorrow at 8am to see what slots they have but google says it could lead to excruciating pain if left untreated and it's already been a week so looking forward to it. Does provide me with a solid reason to skip a shit social event on Saturday and binge on the football and boxing :drool:

[Don]

The fucking GP was away and I had to deal with some bird from Islamabad who could barely speak English again. You usually trust those types for their knowledge but this one diagnosed me with:

https://www.nhs.uk/conditions/temporomandibular-disorder-tmd/

Or, a dental abscess. It's not the latter but I did go to hygienist the day before the pain so maybe linked. All in all, another useless bit of NHS timewasting.

[randomlegend]

Doesn't sound like an ear infection. She's probably right. Good on her for not giving you a pointless course of antibiotics just to placate you.

[Shindig]

Welcome to the lockjaw crew. You'll be fine until you yawn one day and it pops like a motherfucker.

[Don]

Nah, I was hoping they wouldn't prescribe any antibiotics for the same reason tbf. Just don't feel like she managed to give me anything more than what google would which seems to be the norm.

[Giggles]

Accidental lethal injection ftw.

[randomlegend]

Nah, I was hoping they wouldn't prescribe any antibiotics for the same reason tbf. Just don't feel like she managed to give me anything more than what google would which seems to be the norm.

That wasn't what you got from google though was it. You thought you had an ear infection.

She's told you what you probably have. It doesn't need any treatment from her at this point. What did you want her to do?

[Offshore Toon]

I've got a couple of lumps under the skin of my armpit. They're decent sizes (about a malteser) and slightly painful, but mostly just uncomfortable when prodded. We talking cancer or nothing to worry about?

[Giggles]

If you’re even asking the question then see a GP as soon as you can. Time is everything if it is the worst.

[randomlegend]

I've got a couple of lumps under the skin of my armpit. They're decent sizes (about a malteser) and slightly painful, but mostly just uncomfortable when prodded. We talking cancer or nothing to worry about?

Get them looked at.

[-james-]

Those are your lymph nodes. They can swell up when you're fighting an infection, I think. Probably nothing but worth getting it checked out.

[randomlegend]

Those are your lymph nodes. They can swell up when you're fighting an infection, I think. Probably nothing but worth getting it checked out.

Probably, but they can be other things and can be enlarged for other reasons.

[Boydy]

Sounds like you're growing some new testicles.

[Giggles]

New?

[Spikey M]

Boydy has bollocks in his armpits?

[Offshore Toon]

Visit to the GP it is. Fingers crossed for testicle.

[Kikó]

Welcome to the lockjaw crew. You'll be fine until you yawn one day and it pops like a motherfucker.

Honestly the worst thing ever.

[Dquincy]

Visit to the GP it is. Fingers crossed for testicle.

Godspeed. I'm sure it's likely nothing, but well played on getting it checked out.

[Offshore Toon]

My original plan was to give it a week or two but I've been scared into calling them tomorrow. GP is bloody £50 here and I wasn't there long ago either. Stupid system.

[Dquincy]

Haggle with them when you get there.

[Offshore Toon]

It's not like they could refuse you tbf.

[Queenslander]

Ive had swollen sweat glands in my armpit before just took some anti-biotics and I was good to go.

[Don]

Useless fucking Manjit will probs ask a load of questions in broken English and say to return if they're still there after 2 weeks.

[randomlegend]

What do you think she should have done that she didn't do?

[Don]

My issue is she hasn't filled me with any confidence that she's accurately diagnosed it. Time will tell and it's probably an issue with the the fact it's all being done over the phone. I just need some cunt to stick that an otospcope inside me and whisper me sweet nothings.

[Spikey M]

GPS are basically just a chat line for lonely pensioners these days. 12% raise indeed.

[Offshore Toon]

Useless fucking Manjit will probs ask a load of questions in broken English and say to return if they're still there after 2 weeks.
The NHS website does say to wait 2 weeks tbf. It's not particularly worrying at the moment either. Even if it is cancer, that'll just end up as another victory under my belt.

[randomlegend]

My issue is she hasn't filled me with any confidence that she's accurately diagnosed it. Time will tell and it's probably an issue with the the fact it's all being done over the phone. I just need some cunt to stick that an otospcope inside me and whisper me sweet nothings.

I hadn't picked up it was all over the phone.

It seems ridiculous to me how much they are still doing over the phone in the name of COVID. We see so many kids who've been managed appallingly in primary care because nobody will actually see and assess them properly

[Don]

Went dentist yesterdayon back of Manjit's advice and Max, the incredibly pasty lad who had my gaydar pinging said it might be a small infection (again not really confident in their own diagnosis) and to just focus on keeping it clean after every meal and hopefully it should fix.

Need to get an interspace dental brush as the supermarkets didn't have them yesterday but it's much better now.

Manjit :hail:
Max :thbup:
Science :cool:

[randomlegend]

What they're trying to tell you is there's nothing serious wrong and to stop being a little bitch.

[7om]

“Interspace dental brush”.

It’s called floss mate.

[niko_cee]

It isn't.

Interdental 'brushes' are the worst though.

I've got the hygienist in two weeks so I'll be getting a lecture on it again.

[Offshore Toon]

The lumps have gone right down so it was either nothing or I've beaten cancer in record time.

[Don]

Interdental I've never understood as even the finest seem too big to replace floss (that is what they're meant for, right?).

Interspace is some small brush designed to get at tricky places so wind your neck in, 7om.

[Shindig]

Floss does the job for me. I've had those brushes in the past and some of them are all too easy to break.

[Don]

The water jet one is fucking disgusting. Mutilates your gums unless you get a flukey shot on target.

[Kikó]

It isn't.

Interdental 'brushes' are the worst though.

I've got the hygienist in two weeks so I'll be getting a lecture on it again.

Every time. "Do you floss?" No
"Use these little twats" No.

Actually bought some decent floss last time but it's impossible to get myself into any habit.

[Dquincy]

The hygienist always used to rub her boobs on my head. Which was weird as I was sat in the waiting room.

I thought it was nice until I saw her scalp one time, which resembled a red flapjack.

[Offshore Toon]

I had a period of a couple years where I flossed every day but now it's every few days/once a week whenever I can be arsed. You'll be able to get a new set for peanuts in twenty years so fuck it.

[niko_cee]

Somewhat overlooking the true horror of the dental implant process.

[Offshore Toon]

I worked at an implant gaff for a couple of years so I'm probably immune to the horrors.

[mo]

I've got to have a colonoscopy on Sunday, so am now on a strict prohibitive diet until 1pm tomorrow, after which I have to fast until the procedure is done. It's fair to say I'm not looking forward to having to shit my guts out from 5pm tomorrow onwards; I plan on being sedated while they shove a camera up my arse so not too worried about that for now. Nor have I given much thought to any bad news that may result from this - I'm statistically more likely to get bowel cancer (national average for men is 7%, my risk is 13-14%) but in my head that's still not that huge. Plus I like to try and avoid worrying about things that may never happen.

Anyway, I'm off for some white bread, chicken noodle soup (sans noodles) and possibly some weak squash.

[mo]

Imagine going through 2 litres of strong laxative, an actual camera shoved up your arse but actually feeling worse when it finished. Awful heartburn after having eaten and dozed off not long after. This has literally been the worst bit.

Came back all clear. Go through this every two years now. A small price to pay.

[Shindig]

Is it a regular screening thing?

[mo]

Yeah. Mum and sister have to have it to - it’s a genetic gene mutation called Lynch’s Syndrome. More prevalent in women (wider range of potential cancers, eg cervical) and eventually sister will have a hysterectomy. So they definitely got the raw deal there.

[Lofty]

If it makes you feel better my father in law had one done without sedation, on his birthday, and half way through the technician's radio batteries ran out so he stopped to replace them :D

[Spikey M]

:lol:

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

"I just need to rub them together for a bit to squeeze some more life out of them".

[Spikey M]

Did he start smacking his arse like I do with the remote control?

[Manc]

Anyone else experienced one of these super colds? Woke up today to a world of pain. Sweating bits, congested to high heaven, NRG in the pits. Fucking grim.

[Don]

I've had nightsweats more often than I have morning wood these days, something is in the air, rest assured.

[Spikey M]

Anyone else experienced one of these super colds? Woke up today to a world of pain. Sweating bits, congested to high heaven, NRG in the pits. Fucking grim.

I've been on a downward spiral all day. Currently sat with tissue stuffed up my nose because the cunt won't stop running.

[Alex]

Anyone else experienced one of these super colds? Woke up today to a world of pain. Sweating bits, congested to high heaven, NRG in the pits. Fucking grim.

Aye, I'm five days into one as we speak. I feel maybe slightly improved today. But not by a lot. I am really hoping for a night free of the hot/cold spells, weird fever dreams and sweating through the sheets every hour though. Because if I don't get a decent spell of proper sleep in soon I fear I may go round the bend. Bad times indeed.

[Boydy]

I've hurt my back doing the strenuous activity of "turning around to look at something while being sat down".

:moop:

[Don]

What caused it was your disgusting lifestyle.

[Boydy]

I eat mostly healthily and workout on my lunchtimes these days you can shut the fuck up you child's-bicycle-stealing cunt.

[Don]

Put down the fucking weights and gloves and complete the Splits Training in 30 Days app routine. Think it's 3 levels, 30 days each, approximately 25-30 mins a day.

Send me a 4 figure sum after as a token of appreciation for the gift I've bestowed upon you.

[Boydy]

First cold in two years. It hits hard now, doesn't it?

[Giggles]

Yeah it’s a fucker of a one this time round, probably after everyone being so immune for ages.

[Manc]

I've had an underlying cold for the past fortnight. Grim.

[Jimmy Floyd]

The guy who sits next to me at work has had the banging cold, and the guy who locks himself away and won't even see his own family has had the banging cold, but I haven't. I think never working from home has made me superhuman.

[Kikó]

I had a pretty severe what I think was, asthma attack last week. Basically couldn't catch my breath during a workout which meant I had to finish early. Felt like my lungs were burning and couldn't catch my breath for a few hours. Went to the doctors to confirm I wasn't about to die but I did think I was about to have a Erikson.

[CJay]

Anyone ever had an illness with swollen glands and pain while swallowing? Accompanied by a very minor cold. I woke up with it on Wednesday and it doesn't seem be going away. I discovered the real purpose of ibuprofen (easing inflammation - always assumed it was just a lesser painkiller) on Friday which has thankfully made it manageable during the day, but it's really affecting my sleep. It's also a miserable existence not being able to enjoy food or drink - 25 minutes just to eat a small bowl of porridge in the morning.

Google seems to reckon strep throat. Tried ringing my doctor but it's next to impossible to get through. Probably sitting with their feet up amirite.

[Spikey M]

Not tonsillitis is it?

[Don]

I had a strep throat last few days from what I think was PMSM from an intense Thai massage. Was enjoyable to briefly not be ill for a sustained period of over a fortnight, would recommend.

Also, get a load of these stats from Giggles and Co:

https://www.bbc.com/news/health-59351050

[Giggles]

Novid?

EDIT: @CJ, not the obsessive one.

[CJay]

Did 2 lateral flow tests last week and they were negatives. I don't seem to have left a trail of bodies behind me over the last week.

Could be tonsillitis too yeah, but I assumed that would go hand in hand with a much worse cold. This throat thing is literally only sore when I swallow. It's not really a conventional sore throat. My voice sounds totally normal.

Saying all that I'm now lying in bed feeling extremely tired. :uhoh:

[Giggles]

I had done 2 of those in the lead up to mine too and even after I tested positive on a PCR I still came out negative on an antigen. Was about 3 days later before I failed one.

Though with the actual swelling it probably isn't. If it was a sore throat on its own with the cold then maybe.

[randomlegend]

Sounds like tonsillitis, which is a fucking miserable experience.

It's usually viral and even the few that aren't, evidence is antibiotics only shorten the course of illness by a day at best.

Best off just riding it out tbh. If it's not improving or worsening after ~5 days then worth seeing GP (or if you become very unwell).

Gargling with some soluble aspirin can help.

[randomlegend]

If he dies, nobody tell the GMC on me.

[CJay]

I'll give the aspirin a go. Cheers. :thbup:

[Baz]

I’ve got an awful cold. Feels like my head is being knelt on by Derek Chauvin, I’ve a bad cough and sneeze loads. Plus when I sneeze, my brain rattles and for a split second, death would be preferable.

Meant to be going away to the Lakes tomorrow too but it’s touch and go, cos I don’t wanna infect my brother in law and his girlfriend.

[Don]

Are they jabbed?

Wait, no, I don't give a fuck.

[Kikó]

I've managed to get a ridiculous fat lip playing football yesterday. I look like I've been boxing with Fury.

[Baz]

Are they jabbed?

Wait, no, I don't give a fuck.Of course. I don’t associate with morons.

It’s not covid though.

[CJay]

Got me some antibiotics on Wednesday afternoon and started feeling better the next morning. So nice to be able to enjoy eating again. It’s still vaguely there but definitely on the mend. Totally lacking in energy now.

Doctor never said what it was nor did she want to see me, but I suppose she seems to have got it right in the end.

[Spikey M]

I don’t associate with morons

You're not going on holiday because you don't want to give your Brother in Law a cold mate. Mate.

Mate.

[Giggles]

A cold.

Looks like you and magic have a new recruit Don.

[Spikey M]

He said its not Covid.

[Baz]

You're not going on holiday because you don't want to give your Brother in Law a cold mate.If it was the other way round I wouldn't be too enthusiastic about spending time with someone with a cold.

I'll be going though.

[Giggles]

He said its not Covid.

Novid?

[Spikey M]

Are we now not allowed to acknowledge the existence of other illnesses? Ok Cool.

[Ian]

Illnesses are just a scam made up by so-called doctors to justify their existence mate.

[Don]

Spikey's just lost and looking for new mates now that his buddy is gobbling proper frankfurters rather than my sausage. Go easy on him.

[Spikey M]

Sorry for my Anti-vaxx bollocks lads. Get isolating Baz. 7 weeks ok?

[randomlegend]

Got me some antibiotics on Wednesday afternoon and started feeling better the next morning. So nice to be able to enjoy eating again. It’s still vaguely there but definitely on the mend. Totally lacking in energy now.

Doctor never said what it was nor did she want to see me, but I suppose she seems to have got it right in the end.

Antibiotics take longer than that to kick in really, so chances are you were getting better on your own anyway. One of the problems with that sort of antibiotic prescribing; people get given them after a few days, then they start to feel better and assume it must be the antibiotics and want them next time because they worked last time, when in reality the illness probably just took its natural course.

[CJay]

The theory (should I say THE SCIENCE?) sounds good, but I was at my worst the day I got them. But yeah it was day 8 so whatever it was was probably running it’s course by then.

[randomlegend]

Well either way, glad you feel better

[SvN]

I'm sure that's bollocks, RL. My appendicitis was treated with antibiotics and I went from agonising pain to barely anything in about 12 hours.

[randomlegend]

I'm sure that's bollocks, RL. My appendicitis was treated with antibiotics and I went from agonising pain to barely anything in about 12 hours.

IV or oral?

Edit: you know what it's probably not that relevant and I'm falling into a bit of an "accepted knowledge" trap. Doctors love IV antibiotics because it makes us feel like we're doing something MORE when in most circumstances orals are probably just as good.

Antibiotics technically start working straight away, but usually it's at least 24-48 hours before you see a significant clinical effect.

Antibiotics are particularly bad at treating appendicitis as well, although the fashion on that does seem to be changing somewhat.

I imagine you will also have been being given some decent analgesia, SvN which will have been responsible for part of the effect.

I tried to discharge myself after being in hospital for 12 hours with appendicitis because it didn't hurt much any more so I thought it couldn't actually be appendicitis, and I wasn't even on antibiotics until post-op

[Spikey M]

I've never met an Anti-AntiBiotic (Anti-Biotic?) Dr before. Disgusting.

[randomlegend]

I actually quite often find myself pondering just quite how incredible antibiotics are. There are many illnesses we now consider pretty routine because we have antibiotics which would probably kill you otherwise. Like significant pneumonias are just run-of-the-mill on any acute medical ward and nobody thinks much about them, but lots of those people would die without antibiotics. It's amazing, really.

What I am anti-, however, is inappropriate use of antibiotics, of which there is a huge amount and in my experience GPs are some of the worst culprits.

Particularly since covid where they seem to have started just giving them out over the phone without even seeing the patient. If I prescribed antibiotics for a patient at work without examining them I'd be crucified and rightly so.

[niko_cee]

If you're anti-anti does that make you probiotic, like the little yoghurts?

[Spikey M]

RandomYakult.

[randomlegend]

More of an Actimel man myself

[SvN]

IV or oral?

Edit: you know what it's probably not that relevant and I'm falling into a bit of an "accepted knowledge" trap. Doctors love IV antibiotics because it makes us feel like we're doing something MORE when in most circumstances orals are probably just as good.

Antibiotics technically start working straight away, but usually it's at least 24-48 hours before you see a significant clinical effect.

Antibiotics are particularly bad at treating appendicitis as well, although the fashion on that does seem to be changing somewhat.

I imagine you will also have been being given some decent analgesia, SvN which will have been responsible for part of the effect.

I tried to discharge myself after being in hospital for 12 hours with appendicitis because it didn't hurt much any more so I thought it couldn't actually be appendicitis, and I wasn't even on antibiotics until post-op

It was just tablets, I wasn't offered pain relief beyond paracetemol tablets.

[randomlegend]

It was just tablets, I wasn't offered pain relief beyond paracetemol tablets.

Who diagnosed you with appendicitis? That's some weird management.

[SvN]

Do you want his name? I don't fucking know, whoever the doctor was that was treating me in hospital.

[randomlegend]

Do you want his name? I don't fucking know, whoever the doctor was that was treating me in hospital.

Lol no, I just meant GP or surgical doctor.

Did they scan you?

[Spikey M]

And your mother's maiden name.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

I'd also like a full medical history.

[Lewis]

Who diagnosed you with appendicitis? That's some weird management.

Misdiagnosed because he wouldn't take his coat off.

[Lofty]

:D

[Baz]

Any of you deviants go to a podiatrist? Went to one today and it was tremendous.

Basically chatting bollocks while some woman sliced all the hard skin off my feet, cut my nails and then moisturised them. Probably one of the best half hours of my year.

[Giggles]

Any of you deviants go to a podiatrist? Went to one today and it was tremendous.

Basically chatting bollocks while some woman sliced all the hard skin off my feet, cut my nails and then moisturised them. Probably one of the best half hours of my year.

A chiropodist?

[Baz]

A chiropodist?

Yea, same thing innit

[Spikey M]

Kind of except one of them is the right name.

[Baz]

Kind of except one of them is the right name.

I'll let you tell them (https://www.google.co.uk/search?q=alpine%20podiatry&btnK=Google+Search&safe=off&sxsrf=AOaemvI018G1JBMMITOj4-GJZWxq1HcLGA:1638396461280&source=hp&ei=3z7kYMrvCseD8gK3v5SwCw&iflsig=AINFCbYAAAAAYORM73cUCB3goX306mKxFPclwZisGx5 K&oq=relentess.com&gs_lcp=Cgdnd3Mtd2l6EAMyBAgAEAoyBAgAEAoyBAgAEAoyBAg AEAoyBAgAEAo6BwgjEOoCECc6BAgjECc6CwgAELEDEIMBEJECO gUIABCRAjoICAAQsQMQgwE6CAguELEDEIMBOgUILhCxAzoCCAA 6AgguOgUIABCxAzoLCC4QsQMQgwEQkwI6CwguELEDEMcBEKMCO gsILhDHARCvARCTAjoICC4QxwEQrwE6BwgAELEDEAo6BAguEAo 6CgguEMcBEK8BEAo6BwguELEDEAo6BggAEAoQHlC9C1jDGWCSG 2gBcAB4AIAB8AKIAeYLkgEHOS4zLjAuMZgBAKABAaoBB2d3cy1 3aXqwAQo&sclient=gws-wiz&ved=2ahUKEwjkn824zsP0AhUQa8AKHeuEBk4QvS56BAgbEDw&uact=5&tbs=lf:1,lf_ui:2&tbm=lcl&rflfq=1&num=10&rldimm=14617535635977767029&lqi=Cg9hbHBpbmUgcG9kaWF0cnlIrrvznL2dgIAIWhkQABABGA AYASIPYWxwaW5lIHBvZGlhdHJ5kgEKcG9kaWF0cmlzdA&rlst=f#btnK=Google%20Search&rlfi=hd:;si:14617535635977767029,l,Cg9hbHBpbmUgcG9 kaWF0cnlIrrvznL2dgIAIWhkQABABGAAYASIPYWxwaW5lIHBvZ GlhdHJ5kgEKcG9kaWF0cmlzdA;mv:[[53.5056873,-2.6956286],[53.4164289,-2.793366]];tbs:lrf:!1m4!1u3!2m2!3m1!1e1!1m4!1u2!2m2!2m1!1e1! 1m4!1u16!2m2!16m1!1e1!1m4!1u16!2m2!16m1!1e2!2m1!1e 2!2m1!1e16!2m1!1e3!3sIAE,lf:1,lf_ui:2).

Why does it even matter? Any of you cunts been to a chiropodist?

[Spikey M]

No, I'm not a woman.

[SincereTheRebel]

I'll let you tell them (https://www.google.co.uk/search?q=alpine%20podiatry&btnK=Google+Search&safe=off&sxsrf=AOaemvI018G1JBMMITOj4-GJZWxq1HcLGA:1638396461280&source=hp&ei=3z7kYMrvCseD8gK3v5SwCw&iflsig=AINFCbYAAAAAYORM73cUCB3goX306mKxFPclwZisGx5 K&oq=relentess.com&gs_lcp=Cgdnd3Mtd2l6EAMyBAgAEAoyBAgAEAoyBAgAEAoyBAg AEAoyBAgAEAo6BwgjEOoCECc6BAgjECc6CwgAELEDEIMBEJECO gUIABCRAjoICAAQsQMQgwE6CAguELEDEIMBOgUILhCxAzoCCAA 6AgguOgUIABCxAzoLCC4QsQMQgwEQkwI6CwguELEDEMcBEKMCO gsILhDHARCvARCTAjoICC4QxwEQrwE6BwgAELEDEAo6BAguEAo 6CgguEMcBEK8BEAo6BwguELEDEAo6BggAEAoQHlC9C1jDGWCSG 2gBcAB4AIAB8AKIAeYLkgEHOS4zLjAuMZgBAKABAaoBB2d3cy1 3aXqwAQo&sclient=gws-wiz&ved=2ahUKEwjkn824zsP0AhUQa8AKHeuEBk4QvS56BAgbEDw&uact=5&tbs=lf:1,lf_ui:2&tbm=lcl&rflfq=1&num=10&rldimm=14617535635977767029&lqi=Cg9hbHBpbmUgcG9kaWF0cnlIrrvznL2dgIAIWhkQABABGA AYASIPYWxwaW5lIHBvZGlhdHJ5kgEKcG9kaWF0cmlzdA&rlst=f#btnK=Google%20Search&rlfi=hd:;si:14617535635977767029,l,Cg9hbHBpbmUgcG9 kaWF0cnlIrrvznL2dgIAIWhkQABABGAAYASIPYWxwaW5lIHBvZ GlhdHJ5kgEKcG9kaWF0cmlzdA;mv:[[53.5056873,-2.6956286],[53.4164289,-2.793366]];tbs:lrf:!1m4!1u3!2m2!3m1!1e1!1m4!1u2!2m2!2m1!1e1! 1m4!1u16!2m2!16m1!1e1!1m4!1u16!2m2!16m1!1e2!2m1!1e 2!2m1!1e16!2m1!1e3!3sIAE,lf:1,lf_ui:2).

Why does it even matter? Any of you cunts been to a chiropodist?

Im not clicking none of your links lad. As Spikey said, yeah you're pussy.

[Baz]

When your scabby rock hard feet look like diabetic gout and mine look like Cinderella’s Only Fans, don’t say I didn’t warn you.

[Waffdon]

Does anyone else hear their pulse beating when they lie down? Is that normal lol?

I get a lot of headaches but I put that down to purely neglecting sleep most of the time (5/6 hours on average probs)