[FOOTBALL] 2017 African Cup of Nations

[Weaver]

The 31st edition of the African Cup of Nations, this time hosted in Gabon, runs from 14th January 2017 until 5th February 2017.

Group A
Gabon, Cameroon, Burkina Faso, Guinea-Bissau

Group B
Algeria, Tunisia, Zimbabwe, Senegal

Group C
Ivory Coast, DR Congo, Morocco, Togo

Group D
Ghana, Mali, Egypt, Uganda

The tournament is being broadcast on Eurosport, and they currently have an offer on their website for a one year pass for £19.99.

Jimmy's full analysis to follow.

[Offshore Toon]

I think its because of the FIFA World Cup 2008 game that I really like Burkina Faso, so I'll be supporting them. I'll also be supporting the mental goalkeepers.

[Shindig]

If they still had MotoGP, I'd have bitten for that.

[Jimmy Floyd]

I'm not as up on it as I used to be, but I still follow all the results. Algeria and Egypt my two favourites but there are at least 10 teams who could feasibly win it. Wide open.

Will be rooting for the DRC as always.

[Disco]

Awesome, I'd forgot this was on so soon.

[Samadini]

Diame is going to run riot. Was asleep for the first part of the season, but really found form in the last 4 weeks.

[CJay]

It's ridiculous that you can't get a monthly subscription to Eurosport.

[Offshore Toon]

For some reason I thought it was tonight. What a spastic.

[-james-]

Apparently DR Congo players have been boycotting training over unpaid bonuses, so I suppose that means that AFCON is properly underway

[Reg]

I went in Smith's twice recently to look for a preview in World Soccer or something but no dice. Settled for a Jonathan Wilson article: https://www.theguardian.com/football/blog/2017/jan/13/africa-cup-of-nations-2017-gabon

Gone with Cameroon to support as I always like their strips.

[Jimmy Floyd]

I'm going to put a few quid on Egypt I think.

[ItalAussie]

Think I might adopt Algeria this time around.

No Cape Verde this time. :(

[Jimmy Floyd]

Guinea-Bissau are even more ridiculous underdogs than Cape Verde. Absolutely no idea where they've come from.

[niko_cee]

Clue's in the name.

[Max Power]

https://www.sporcle.com/games/FourFourTwo_/premier-league-top-african-goalscorers

Take the quiz! I got 31/40.

[Jimmy Floyd]

28. Benjani :drool:

[Shindig]

17. I dunno why but I felt like I was looking in a different timeline.

[Max Power]

Not ashamed to admit I got to a point where I just started hammering in names like "DIAWARA, DIARRA, CISSE, KAMARA" and hoping I lucked out.

[Shindig]

I was spending half of it trying to spend Kachloul.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Mon the Guinea Bissau.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

£2 on Guinea Bissau to win and BTTS @ 26
£5 on Zezinho AGS @ 10.

What a name Zezinho is btw, he's going to be named the best player in the tournament.

[Jimmy Floyd]

I've heard of six Gabon starters and zero Guinea-Bissau. Novelties :drool:

Surely it's time Issa Hayatou died.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Look at Zezinho too, what a man with that hair.

[Jimmy Floyd]

I'm on Gabon -1 I'm afraid. £10. That tenner is going to make me rich by the end of the tournament.

African national anthems played only on random brass instruments as ever.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

He's fucking blasting out the anthem too.

[Jimmy Floyd]

This Guinea-Bissau goalkeeper has comedy potential I think.

[Jimmy Floyd]

That incident confirms refs extremely bent in favour of Gabon.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Look at how amazing they are.

They've completely SHUT DOWN Aubameyang.

[Jimmy Floyd]

They're absolutely awful. Gabon will piss it second half.

[Jimmy Floyd]

No yellow for that :drool:

How I love this tournament. Automatic red card anywhere else in the world.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

How was that not a yellow?

Possibly the greatest foul ever seeing as it happened because he missed the fucking ball.

[Disco]

My stream is showing the half time entertainment, whatever happened to someone doing keepie uppies and a crossbar challenge?

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

There's a goal in this for Guinea Bissau.

[Jimmy Floyd]

There isn't. Dreadful game. I hope the later one is better. It should be, although Cameroon are dross these days.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Mendy :face:

[Jimmy Floyd]

Gabon are indescribably bad. I was walking the dog either side of half time so missed the goal, so I can only assume there was a goal given just because someone behind the scenes ordered it, because I can't envisage them actually putting it in the net.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Lol, they deserved that. Gabon out already.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

:rave:

Had £5 on them to score the second @ 5.5 and £5 on Mendy to score the next. Shame he missed the header earlier but I'll take the goal.

£15 on Burkina Faso @ 3.4.

[Disco]

Get in.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Woah woah woah woah. Burkina Faso 13/5? What is that all about. On like donkey kong.

People price up African football as if it's permanently 2001.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Yep, it's mental.

I was thinking maybe some play strike has happened but it doesn't seem so.

[Offshore Toon]

Bet365 streaming it too if you place a bet. I'm on the Burkina train.

[Jimmy Floyd]

I'd have the two teams roughly equal for the win, the double price is absurd.

Especially now Aboubakar is on the bench.

[Boydy]

I saw that earlier and looked back in this thread as I thought you had said something before about Burkina Faso probably being decent at this tournament but I couldn't find anything. Tenner on them now at 4 on Betfair Exchange.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

I've added an extra £17.50 on them and £10 on Bertrand Traore AGS.

[Jimmy Floyd]

A cappella national anthems is a new one even for this tournament. Props.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Erm, what the fuck is going on with the anthem?

[Boydy]

Hey, Burkina Faso:

http://www.makeandtakes.com/wp-content/uploads/Choochoo.jpg

[CJay]

Does that lumbering oaf Bance still play for Burkina Faso?

[Jimmy Floyd]

He's on the bench, like the legend he is.

The standard in this game is so far above the first one.

[Jimmy Floyd]

First goalkeeping lulz of the tournament.

[CJay]

That was poor.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

How did he miss that, ugh.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Reminiscent of that Ronald Koeman one from '93.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

What a tackle by the keeper.

[Jimmy Floyd]

That, on the other hand, was the greatest piece of goalkeeping of all time.

[CJay]

That was amazing. :D Absolutely brutal - surely that's a red?

Crazy defending.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Genuinely thought they were going to carry him off like that after 'misplacing the stretcher'.

I was so disappointed when the stretcher was slid under him.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

One more you pricks.

[CJay]

This has been a quality game.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Bance :drool:

[Jimmy Floyd]

That was quality. Both should go through.

[Offshore Toon]

That was quality when the Burgoalkipa ran out and made that tackle. Manuel Neuergrito.

[Max Power]

Mahrez scored a lovely opener but the much vaunted Algerians are trailing 2-1 to Zimbabwe and deservedly so.

[Jimmy Floyd]

I have no explanation for this. Come on Ince's boys.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Biggest howler of the competition thus far.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

I hate Tunisia so much, I'm not sure why though, so I hope Senegal pump them.

Diouf :drool:

[Jimmy Floyd]

Tunisia are an immensely hateable team. The kings of 1-0 up and timewaste.

Aliou Cissé has a strong, strong look going on.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Kasperczak though, I had no idea he was back.

That makes Tunisia more likeable.

http://weszlo.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/07/Clipboard0111-620x416.jpg

[Jimmy Floyd]

Fucking lol at Abdennour giving that away.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Fucking hell, what a mongo challenge.

[Davgooner]

The camera work there was disappointing.

On over 1.5 in the first half.

[Jimmy Floyd]

You've gone overs in the African Nations? You're the sort of guy we need on the Brexit negotiation team.

[Davgooner]

Tunisia are normally cunts for it, but thankfully they've been fucking shit thus far.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Kage :drool:

Lovely goalkeeper mistake to set him up.

[CJay]

Eurosport's stats - courtesy of Orange apparently - display 'accurated passes', 'bad passes', and some sort of 'accurated' percentage. :D

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Why does he have Kabananga on his back?

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

So commentators have said he goes by Junior Kabananga.

818558387965296640

https://translate.google.co.uk/translate?hl=en&sl=fr&u=http://www.leopardsfoot.com/can-2017-liste-definitive-des-23-avec-junior-kabananga-mais-sans-kage/&prev=search

https://translate.google.co.uk/translate?hl=en&sl=fr&u=http://www.radiookapi.net/2017/01/10/actualite/sport/can-2017-herve-kage-surpris-apres-etre-elague-de-la-liste-de-23-joueurs&prev=search

But he's being listed on official sources as Herve Kage.

Wiki says they were born 6 days apart in the same place. HAVE THEY EVER BEEN SEEN IN A ROOM TOGETHER.

Fuck.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Morocco have been donned senseless there. Long live Mobutu.

Some Congolese have two names because the above mentioned dictatorial genius banned French names in the 70s. 'Kage' sounds more Belgian/Flemish though.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

El Hadary :drool:

[Offshore Toon]

Herve Koffi (Burkina Faso 'keeper) is a lunatic even by African standards.

[Offshore Toon]

Is that a trumpet in the crowd for Algeria-Tunisia? Its so brilliantly annoying.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Algerie basically out then. That's a bit of a shock but then they've been rubbish for about a year now, for reasons that elude me.

I say basically out, if Senegal win tonight they are 100% out.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Ivory Coast and the DRC are six minutes in. I've laid the Ivorians.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Neeskens Kebano :cool:

Glorious strike.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Bony equalises, but your man Kabananga instantly makes it 2-1 with the freest header of all time. There was a piece of comedy goalkeeping in there as well. What a game.

[niko_cee]

Hell of a finish ruled out by the linesman. Dodgy.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Clearly two centimetres offside.

Pity I have to go out tonight rather than watch an Hervé Renard v Claude le Roy classico.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

That was a lovely counter attack.

Good start.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Togo keeper might be the worst in the tournament.

[Jimmy Floyd]

This game wins the biennial 'African Nations atrocious pitch' lottery.

Ghana's kit is so good.

[Reg]

First game for me (Cameron v Gabon). Is this likely to be a good one?

That is a cool kit, Jim.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

It will be, Gabon need to win really.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Fucking lol at Aubameyang.

Cameroon look shit.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Gabon need to win and Cameroon need to draw, which is fairly apparent from the first five minutes.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Drawing of lots if both games end with the same scoreline I believe.

'Mon the lots.

[Reg]

These guys are gonna be knackered.

[Jimmy Floyd]

We had lots a couple of these ago between Mali and Guinea or something.

Ondoa, the Cameroon keeper looks pretty good. They have a long tradition of the best keepers in Africa.

[Reg]

Ngadeu doesn't look very good. Has just fouled so far.

Surprised Cameroon are ahead in the group. Not much going forward so far, apart from Tambe's 35 yard shots.

[Jimmy Floyd]

They're an awful team, but fortunately for them this is an awful group.

They won't be making the World Cup. 4 points behind Nigeria already in their group. Algeria, in the same group, appear to have collectively raised the white flag.

[John]

Is there a particular reason Kameni isn't the top man any more? It seems mad that someone with that much experience and ability still playing first team stuff in La Liga would be binned for some kid who doesn't get a club game.

[Jimmy Floyd]

I don't think he's played for them for absolutely years. I'd guess at least 8 years. His decision.

[John]

Google and Wikipedia tell me he last played in October 2015, and he'd previously been binned for trying to turn the team against the FA or somesuch.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

We had lots a couple of these ago between Mali and Guinea or something.

Ondoa, the Cameroon keeper looks pretty good. They have a long tradition of the best keepers in Africa.

Yeah 2015.

I was so happy that we got a lots draw.

I was pissed though that they didn't show it anywhere as it would have been amazing. They'd have dressed it up so much for just 2 balls.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Google and Wikipedia tell me he last played in October 2015, and he'd previously been binned for trying to turn the team against the FA or somesuch.

He hasn't appeared in a major game in my memory since at least the 2008 Afcon and even then I think the lumbering oaf Hamidou started and he was on the bench.

Strap in folks, we have our first African Nations Timewaste on our hands here.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Google and Wikipedia tell me he last played in October 2015, and he'd previously been binned for trying to turn the team against the FA or somesuch.

That was when he came back into the side.

His last call up was for the game against France in May last year.

http://lcclc.info/index.php/2016/08/27/cameroon-carlos-kameni-goalie-reacts-to-hugo-broos-decision/

Although he rejected it and the manager hates him now.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

I apologise for saying this game would be good btw.

Bar the first 5 minutes it's been trash.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Gabon are utterly horrid. Cameroon are bad too, but at least they have some game plan.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Keeper :cool:

[Jimmy Floyd]

Ondoa was fucking loving that. Top man. Glad those two went through.

More bad news for Sunderland, Didier N'Dong flying back early.

Stewart Robson calling Aubameyang out for being the lazy sack of shit he is as well.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Quarter-finals so far:

Burkina Faso v Tunisia
Senegal v Cameroon

Tonight Ivory Coast v Morocco is a biggie, Ivory Coast have to win or they depart, whilst a draw will in all probability be enough for Morocco. DR Congo v Togo the other game. In fact, I think a draw is enough for Morocco.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Ivory Coast are such a frustrating team to watch. Serge Aurier is literally an appalling footballer, and Zaha must be one of the thickest blokes around.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

A front three of Kalou - Bony - Zaha is stunning.

I've missed watching Kalou.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Kalou is a don compared to the other two.

Hervé Renard pioneering first half timewasting, I like it.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

That's a stunner.

Goodbye Ivory Coast.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Deservedly so, they are fucking bad. Serey Die, the first footballer ever to be named after the division he should be playing in.

[Jimmy Floyd]

It takes a proper North African side to have a massive violent seethe even though they're winning.

[Davgooner]

Overs in the Egypt game on offer at 4.00. I know, but still.

[Jimmy Floyd]

I just went to check 1.5 and it's the other side of evens. And I've still piled on unders. Combination of the two teams (Hector Cuper ffs), the situation and the pitch should make it a banker.

I've never seen 0-0 as low as 3/1.

Gone 2-0 in the other game as it's what Mali require.

[-james-]

Mali and Uganda, neither of whom scored (or threatened to, from what I saw) in their first two games are playing on what looks like a rice field. Life savings on 0-0.

[Jimmy Floyd]

The early Egyptian goal just made me even more confident that under 1.5 is coming in.

I can't watch normal football after this glorious unders fare on these pitches.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Nothing better than spending 79 minutes plus stoppages watching an under 1.5 tick down.

[-james-]

Nothing worse than being comfortably reclined watching them fail to get on the end of long balls for seventy minutes straight, and then have your under 2 not win because of these:

http://streamable.com/kmipa

http://streamable.com/f3fmg

I can't really complain. Quite amusing.

[Jimmy Floyd]

The danger is always someone getting something on the laces, because of the pitches they grow up on you never see many African players sidefoot them in, and if you do it's North Africans.

Jordan Ayew had a bosh at the end but luckily the goalkeeper who is old enough to be in the Valley of the Kings got something on it.

[Offshore Toon]

That bloke who scored the second goal is ripping off Pogba in every sense.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Being the French commentator whose only job is to say 'oh lalalala' when a decent goal is scored is a pretty awesome job.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Burkina Faso 4.6.

http://replygif.net/i/802.gif

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Obscene.

£25 on them.

[Jimmy Floyd]

These North African teams all suffer from the same thing which is their ridiculous hot blooded temperament. If they chilled the fuck out they would be a lot more successful.

[Jimmy Floyd]

The woeful Khazri substituted and seethes at Kasperczak. Who precisely does he think he is?

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Bance :drool:

[Max Power]

The Aristalde Bance Theme is the soundtrack to my life

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Where was this Bance in the last tournament?

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

The keeper :D

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

http://i.imgur.com/e1kqcNJ.png

Scenes.

[Baz]

Obscene.

£25 on them.
:youpi:

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

I don't think I've ever seen a goalkeeper do a backflip too.

Played, Koffi.

[Jimmy Floyd]

I've made three hundred fucking quid on that.

Hmm.

Probably the worst priced match I've ever seen, people just have no clue. Were the odds based on GDP?

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

I've got the following on:

£20 on Senegal @ 2.05
£20 on Senegal & BTTS @ 5
£7 on Diouf FGS @ 7
£2.53 on Diouf FGS & Senegal to win 2-1 @ 31.

[Jimmy Floyd]

1-0 Senegal for me.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

825412994549108744

Koffi is slowly becoming my favourite African keeper ever.

It's still Kapango for this ofc:


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tSoKLGD1GX8

[Jimmy Floyd]

Koffi is a legend, and only 20 too, could have another ten Cups of Nations in him.

[niko_cee]

Forza FECAFOOT!

[-james-]

Haha Mané. Not sure there was a bad penalty until that. What country does he live in again?

[Jimmy Floyd]

The proper lol is Liverpool fans treating him as some sort of messiah. Better player when you're in Gabon, eh.

Cameroon nailed on after it went to penalties, Ondoa by far the better goalkeeper.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

I gave up at 90 minutes.

Not surprised that Mane fluffed a penalty.

[Jimmy Floyd]

It wasn't that bad a penalty, 90% of African keepers wouldn't have saved it.

[niko_cee]

The proper lol is Liverpool fans treating him as some sort of messiah. Better player when you're in Gabon, eh.


He's coming home, he's coming home,
He's coming, Sadio's coming home,
....
Jurgen Klopp still dreaming,
30 days of hurt
....

Get that man a fucking non-African private jet.

In fairness, Liverpool have lost just about every game he hasn't played in this season (starting at Burnley). He's somehow much more important than logic would suggest.

[Waffdon]

Ghana at 2.15? Yes...?

[Jimmy Floyd]

Absolutely not. Congo the value.

[Baz]

Absolutely not. Congo the value.
As good value as Burkina Faso yesterday?

[Jimmy Floyd]

As good value as Burkina Faso yesterday?

Yeah, I would say so.

[niko_cee]

They only went and got him that private jet.

Probably booked it after telling him to miss the penalty.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

That goal from Mpokou was fucking stunning.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Ghana in front, spent about 5 minutes doing a stupid dance celebration, DRC equalising with an unreal 30 yarder minutes later :drool:

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

How was that only a yellow?

[Jimmy Floyd]

Ghana now completely lost their heads. Think they're so much better than they are.

[Jimmy Floyd]

How was that only a yellow?

African reffing isn't like Europe, it has to be a proper assault for a tackle to get a red.

[Jimmy Floyd]

And that's one of the most brainless things I've ever seen. Just let him go.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Ghana v Cameroon
Egypt v Burkina Faso

I wouldn't rule out Burkina going all the way, you know. As much chance as anyone. I find Ghana the least likeable of the four.

[ItalAussie]

Random observation: Every team from Pot 3 in the original seedings qualified from their group. Cameroon, Senegal, Morocco, and Egypt.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Seedings for this you might as well just get Paul the Octopus to point at flags.

Morocco are still shit, which is a bit of a disappointment. I think the five for the World Cup will be Egypt, Nigeria, a crap Ivory Coast, probably Senegal, and then I think the DRC might just pip Tunisia.