The Weather Thread (Sponsored by the Autumn Equinox 2015)

[Foe]

That seems unlikely.

Edit: Internet says 27/28. Not bad for you lot. Foe must be a crisp.

I’ve become a tomato far too many times to fall for that trick now.

Wasn’t that hot in Aberdeen yesterday though.

My vote for best beach goes for loch morlich in aviemore. Was sat on the beach there last summer in upper 20s, the car park limits the overcrowding potential and there’s a cafe/water sports area and decent walk around the loch.

Google it. :drool:

Or just search my posts, I’m confident i talk about it annually.

[Lewis]

Our dingy windowless-yet-air conditioned sub-office has come into its own today. All the plebs on the main floorplate sat seething into their desk fans.

[Jimmy Floyd]

The small thin women in my office, even at 30+ degrees, complain bitterly when the air conditioning goes on. Odd that the cost of warm clothing doesn't seem to rise with the cost of energy.

[Spikey M]

The small thin women in my office, even at 30+ degrees, complain bitterly when the air conditioning goes on. Odd that the cost of warm clothing doesn't seem to rise with the cost of energy.

I think this annoys me more than any other form office politics.

It's hot and your workplace has aircon, Sonia. Remember the several hot days before today that you turned up dressed for the beach on? Then moaned all day that you were cold? Yeah? Learn then. Because there's 2 options here. You wear normal office clothes like the men have to, or we all walk around in our Calvin Classics.

[Foe]

Let’s not go discouraging summer dresses on women*

*tick tings aside.

[Don]

When I said I wouldn't complain about this heat, I wasn't envisaging 26 degrees but greyer than you losers' lives. The sun can fix a muggy day but this is grim.

[Smjffy]

It's even worse inside this kitchen.

[Ben]

Taz going full gammon.

[Waffdon]

After being obliterated by the sun for the past 11 days I was looking forward to some cooler weather to come home to. I guess not. 19/20c the next two days which is sound but then it’s 24c, 26c, 29c and 28c from Sunday onwards. Fuck off, mate. Doesn’t even say it’s sunny. Rainy or cloudy the whole time. :sick:

[Jimmy Floyd]

36 here on Monday. My flat gets so hot and it's so impossible to move the warm air inside that I might just sleep rough for a night instead.

[Don]

36/37 on Tuesday. We out here now baby.

[Luke Emia]

The office is hotter than the sun at the minute. But, I bought an air-conditioning unit for my house to make sure I could sleep and it's the best investment I have ever made.

[Smjffy]

It is what it is and it's nothing new given how long I've been at it now but FML, kitchens in this weather is borderline hell. I wouldn't even wish chefs ass on TimboFM.

[neo_hippy]

I move house on Tuesday. It's going to be brutal

[Shindig]

We had wind up north so it was nice. Came home to some wicked clouds, too.

[Don]

Bite down on your apples, lads, touching 40 on Monday and Tuesday now. My Tuesday football's been called off but looking forward to the Monday runabout :D

[Spikey M]

You'd have to be retarded to go for a run in 40c, which, well, yeah, as you were.

[Don]

By runabout I mean a game of football. And I'm not some soft shite. Now get that apple back in.

[Lewis]

The gym - which has air conditioning - has been dead the last few nights. I was the only person in it from half-five until half-seven earlier. :cool:

[randomlegend]

The hospital is going to be absolutely unbearable Monday and Tuesday. 38 ffs.

[Spikey M]

Go to the gym instead then, dickhead.

[Danny]

Went for a run the other week when it was 102F/39C.

Dreadful decision

[Andrew]

I'm fat and a ginger, which according to my boss is not a reasonable excuse to have Monday and Tuesday off work

[Shindig]

I've got to be out Wednesday for a dentist check up so I guess I'll brave the apparent thunderstorms.

[Don]

Played 90 today in about 30 with a cold. The latter is reallyfucking up my enjoyment of this heatwave, headache pretty much constantly. Hopefully tomorrow's football lays me to rest.

[Lewis]

Go to the gym instead then, dickhead.

Empty yesterday as well. :cool:

[Baz]

This weather is tremendous. Gutted I’ve got actual work to do tomorrow cos a paddling pool day without the kids would be mega. I’m sure I’ll manage to dip my feet in at some point.

Genuine lol at people acting like it’s a bad thing.

[randomlegend]

Tomorrow and Tuesday are not going to be "this weather", it's going to be 10 degrees hotter. It will be miserable.

[Don]

For your lot, yeah.

[Shindig]

Supposed to hit 34 around here on Tuesday. Positively Mediterranean.

[Boydy]

It was 26 here earlier when I nipped out to go to the shop and that was too much for me.

It's so humid too. That's the worst.

[Spikey M]

With Baz tbh. Only downside is I have to work through it. Sleeping is going to be grim / impossible but being able to spend lunch in the pool and have a waterfight with the kids and neighbours in the evening is good shit.

This last week has been amazing. Keep burning those fossil fuels.

[Manc]

Today (30°) was right on the edge for me. With zero wind and an increase to 34° I'll be climbing in the freezer.

[randomlegend]

I think people are underestimating how much hotter it's going to feel if it's genuinely 38-40 tomorrow compared to what it's been the last week.

[Spikey M]

I experienced 36c in the UK a few years back. I'm aware what it's like. Shit to work in. Shit to sleep in. Great to spend in the pool.

It's only 2 days and atleast your tears will keep your cheeks cool.

[Boydy]

Have you got a fucking pool in your back garden or what?

[Spikey M]

A paddling pool, yes.

And a water table. And a sprinkler toy thing. And water pistols.

[Baz]

Tomorrow and Tuesday are not going to be "this weather", it's going to be 10 degrees hotter. It will be miserable.Today was 32. Tomorrow says 36 and 35 on Tuesday.

Nothing a few extra ice cubes in my drinks and some more dips in the [paddling] pool won’t resolve.

Probably not gonna risk dropping from factor 50 to 30 though.

[Jimmy Floyd]

The day will be fine tomorrow, but the evening will be a nightmare as my flat retains all the heat. I might genuinely have to run a bath and stay in it.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

It's meant to be 38-40 here which is going to be massively shit but I'm more worried about the fact that it's meant to be 25c throughout the night during those 2 days.

I'll be stunned if I manage more than an hour each night.

[Boydy]

A paddling pool, yes.

And a water table. And a sprinkler toy thing. And water pistols.

https://i.pinimg.com/originals/96/df/2d/96df2de6760ac1d78fb2604713c41993.jpg

[Don]

First COVID and now this, thoughts and prayers to my fatties.

This business of not opening windows is not something I've tried before but gonna give it a whirl tomorrow and see. I'm not fucking drawing the curtians throughout the day like some incel tho.

[Giggles]

Rats do love the heat, makes them handier to flush out.

[Spikey M]

https://i.pinimg.com/originals/96/df/2d/96df2de6760ac1d78fb2604713c41993.jpg

You should see my pile of sugar.

[Spikey M]

First COVID and now this, thoughts and prayers to my fatties.

This business of not opening windows is not something I've tried before but gonna give it a whirl tomorrow and see. I'm not fucking drawing the curtians throughout the day like some incel tho.

I think the curtains are meant to be shut because closed windows + open curtains = greenhouse.

[Yevrah]

It does feel quite warm this morning.

Still, in a country that hasn’t had any signs of summer for two years, I’ll take that.

[Luke Emia]

I think the curtains are meant to be shut because closed windows + open curtains = greenhouse.

It works. Then once the sun moves away from a certain part of your house you can then open those windows and curtains and start letting air in again. Although how well it will work in 40 degree heat is another question.

[Spikey M]

It works. Then once the sun moves away from a certain part of your house you can then open those windows and curtains and start letting air in again. Although how well it will work in 40 degree heat is another question.

I'm aware. I was just questioning the logic of following the "windows closed" advice, but ignoring the "curtains closed" bit.

[Clunge]

My partner is Portuguese and regularly bemoans the lack of shutters and blackout drapes in the UK. I've always very much been a 'just open up everything' tactician but part of me thinks that does, genuinely, just fill your house with hotter air from outside.

[Spikey M]

My partner is Portuguese and regularly bemoans the lack of shutters and blackout drapes in the UK. I've always very much been a 'just open up everything' tactician but part of me thinks that does, genuinely, just fill your house with hotter air from outside.

It's a solid strategy 99% of the time, but yeah. If it's 30c inside and 40c outside, closed windows and curtains is the answer.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Shutters and blackout drapes aren't so fucking clever for the other 350 days of the year.

[Luke Emia]

I suppose it all depends on how much this hotter weather does become the norm. My house isn't too bad but it does seem that houses built within the last 15 to 20 years have been built to stop heat escaping which is fine when it's cold but an absolute nightmare any time the weather hits anything 25 Celsius plus.

I heard somewhere that 7 or the top 10 hottest days recorded have come in the past 20 years(with today and tomorrow to presumably be added) and you only have to look at 2018 & 2020 that these prolonged periods of warmth and no rain are becoming more frequent.

On the flip side of that you do ask is the recording of said weather more accurate now than it used to be.

[Spikey M]

Insulation is equally good at keeping heat out as it is at keeping it in, so these snazzy new builds will have it the easiest if they just keep the sun out to begin with.

Someone on the news yesterday said that by 2100 we could see a 40c+ day/spell once every 4 years. That seems pretty manageable and even if it were to happen every day between May and September, we would just adopt widespread Aircon. Bring it on.

[Shindig]

It's so dependent on location, too. Outside of the cities, there's probably a decent enough drop.

[Spikey M]

It's so dependent on location, too. Outside of the cities, there's probably a decent enough drop.

Not down here :cool:

https://i.ibb.co/GcbhF9Y/Screenshot-20220718-090350-Brave.jpg

[Baz]

Paddling pool is filling up. And I’m home alone. :cool:

Any tips on identifying the location of a slow puncture, please?

[Yevrah]

Bubbles?

[Yevrah]

Oh and it turns out the hot tub with cold water is one of the best things ever in this heat.

[Lofty]

I managed to convince the wife om the need for a new a new bbq yesterday so I'll be grilling on that no matter the risk this week.

[Yevrah]

The “do not travel” warnings might be one of the most bed wetting things I’ve ever seen. Anyone would think it’d reached boiling point.

[randomlegend]

There's one doctors office in the whole hospital that is air conditioned and nobody uses it except me. I'm also on the one shift where I can sit in here doing "admin" mostly undisturbed for the next 2 days.

18 degrees :drool:

[Spikey M]

I think their fear is cars will start conking out and all the motorways will be gridlocked rather than any impending doom.

[Baz]

My work laptop shut down before from overheating. I had to bring it inside and then immediately go back outside without it. :baz:

[Yevrah]

I think their fear is cars will start conking out and all the motorways will be gridlocked rather than any impending doom.

If it was 1970 and Rover were in full force still then maybe.

[Pepe]

So you lot have yet to discover AC?

Having a heat pump should be as basic as having a refrigerator in 2022.

[Ben]

We literally have about 10 days a year where AC would be necessary. People seem to be a bit caught up in the frenzy of thinking we have moved to Southern Spain.

[Yevrah]

And to add, I’ve never been abroad anywhere where it’s been advised not to rent a car due to the temperature. Must have missed that one and all the ensuing carnage driving in 35 degrees causes.

[Boydy]

Had the window open for a bit but all I could hear was the neighbours' prick kids screaming.

[-james-]

The “do not travel” warnings might be one of the most bed wetting things I’ve ever seen. Anyone would think it’d reached boiling point.

I agree to an extent, but plenty of oldfatsick people probably wouldn't realise they're in mortal danger today.

[Spikey M]

From what I've just seen the do not travel stuff appears to mainly be regarding trains.

Is there a weather type trains aren't fucked up by?

[Yevrah]

I agree to an extent, but plenty of oldfatsick people probably wouldn't realise they're in mortal danger today.

Is this piling on with the joke? If not, absolutely no one is in mortal danger today. Most Brits spend all year saving for a holiday in a warmer climate, doing a job they hate to allow them to afford it, yet when said hot weather comes here a subsection of people completely shit the bed. It's insane.

[Yevrah]

From what I've just seen the do not travel stuff appears to mainly be regarding trains.

Is there a weather type trains aren't fucked up by?

Having just had a proper look, the focus does seem to be on trains, but the BBC have used "journeys" as they absolutely love encouraging people to stay indoors.

I also saw this gem:


On top of the Met Office warning, the UK Health Security Agency issued its highest level four heat alert to health and care bodies - warning illness and death could occur "among the fit and healthy".

Could it? Could it really?

[Pepe]

We literally have about 10 days a year where AC would be necessary. People seem to be a bit caught up in the frenzy of thinking we have moved to Southern Spain.

A heat pump will heat up your home more efficiently than any gas/oil heater, and then it is there to provide cool air any time you feel like it.

[Pepe]

Could it? Could it really?

"I am overweight but fit."

[Yevrah]

"I am overweight but fit."

What intrigues me more is what's driving all this nonsense. I don't remember it being this way when I was younger, but I am so old now maybe I've just forgotten.

[-james-]

Is this piling on with the joke? If not, absolutely no one is in mortal danger today. Most Brits spend all year saving for a holiday in a warmer climate, doing a job they hate to allow them to afford it, yet when said hot weather comes here a subsection of people completely shit the bed. It's insane.

I find it hard to believe that people who go to hot countries go out in the 38+ degree sun. That is high even for the hotter parts of Europe. Southern European countries don't operate in the early afternoon hours insert Lewis joke. You don't do stuff outside when it's that hot, basic knowledge.

[randomlegend]

A heat pump will heat up your home more efficiently than any gas/oil heater, and then it is there to provide cool air any time you feel like it.

I don't believe all heat pumps are set up/able to be used for cooling. We have a heatpump but as far as I'm aware it can't be used to cool.

[Spikey M]

The danger isn't from people sitting in their gardens, it's people stuck on hospital wards that are boiling hot on the best of days. The hot and the cold kill vulnerable people every year.

[Boydy]

Yev doing a very good boomer impression here.

[Yevrah]

I might have jumped the gun saying no one is in danger, but the fit and healthy, come on?

[Yevrah]

Yev doing a very good boomer impression here.

I mean, I'm carrying a bit more timber than I should be, so I'm probably in a risk group.

[Boydy]

Well when you've got idiots like Taz going to play football in it, maybe.

[Spikey M]

Everyone's (not everyone, but you know) being a bit silly at the moment really. It's not Defcon level 12 - the floor is lava, but it's also not your standard heatwave. We didn't get warnings like this as kids because we didn't get near 40c temperatures when we were kids.

It's hot. It will be fine for most people, but vulnerable people will die. There's also a chance young fit people could die. Heat stroke is a thing and people are often stupid.

Is it being overhyped? Sure. 24 hour news, innit. Is it no big deal? Not for the vulnerable and their loved ones.

Now sit in your paddling pools and stop moaning you old bastards.

[Ben]

The ambient temperature underground at my work is 32.5C. Might be the first time ever it's cooler down there than on top.

[Kikó]

I think Yev knows better than scientists. Big weather coming out again trying to make money from us.

[-james-]

Well when you've got idiots like Taz going to play football in it, maybe.

This is probably it. There will probably be some yuppie cokehead dropping dead on their weekly 5k.

[Yevrah]

I think Yev knows better than scientists. Big weather coming out again trying to make money from us.

I mean, I did with COVID when they were all shitting the bed over the South African variant post vaccine (and at numerous other times let's not forget), so why would this be any different? If it smells like bullshit, it's bullshit.

Talking of which, are you still on your crusade to vaccinate toddlers (because Science told you so), for no reason whatsoever?

[Kikó]

When was I on a crusade to vaccinate toddlers? If the medical advice says they should then why not? I am vaccinating my child for a multitude of things so why not COVID.

[niko_cee]

If this ends without the temperature record being broken it'll be extra double lol. 24hour news + years of covid hysteria have just broken large parts of society. Can't wait for the long heatstroke stories in a few weeks, by which point another biblical pestilence (probably flooding) will be upon us.

[Don]

Yev is Charlie Mullins and he's absolutely donning it.

Just to put on record in case I do die out there today, i) the block booking for pitch was being kept and charged for by the venue when we enquired so the blame is on them; and ii) I'm fucking massive.

[Lewis]

So you lot have yet to discover AC?

Having a heat pump should be as basic as having a refrigerator in 2022.

I read the other day that America uses as much power on air conditioning as the United Kingdom does on literally everything, so prepare to be guilted/taxed out of that in the near future.

[Jimmy Floyd]

If this ends without the temperature record being broken it'll be extra double lol. 24hour news + years of covid hysteria have just broken large parts of society. Can't wait for the long heatstroke stories in a few weeks, by which point another biblical pestilence (probably flooding) will be upon us.

In league cricket on Saturday we got issued with official ECB guidance to have the drinks break in the shade. Don't think it was even 30.

Heads have gone.

[Ben]

I remember playing in 33C last summer and there was absolutely no guidance, not even a second drinks break. But COVID was still a thing then so the media were occupied.

[phonics]

It’s not that bad tbh.

[randomlegend]

Some cunt has just come into my air conditioned paradise and PUT THE HEATER ON because "I'm African I can't cope with it this cold".

Maybe fuck off to one of the other 1000 computers in the hospital that isn't in literally the only room with aircon? Twat.

[Lewis]

'You know where else is warm mate...'

[Yevrah]

When was I on a crusade to vaccinate toddlers? If the medical advice says they should then why not? I am vaccinating my child for a multitude of things so why not COVID.

You're literally doing it in that post. :D

And you might not want to because the risks (even as small as they are) outweigh the benefits - but because some medical advice has said you should, there's your mast, nailed to it.

[Kikó]

I'm ok with trusting medical professionals who know more than me with this. I don't think replying to you is much of a crusade.

[Foe]

Good thing I was working today otherwise I’d be tomato red. Beautiful.

24c is just a lovely temperature.

[Magic]

I'm ok with trusting medical professionals who know more than me with this. I don't think replying to you is much of a crusade.

I wouldn't mate, always if you think it's not right question it.

[Kikó]

I usually consult YouTube first.

[Yevrah]

The crusade stuff was more when Spikey questioned whether junior mouse should have it, and was roundly set upon.

[Manc]

35° and overcast. :sick:

[Shindig]

This is probably it. There will probably be some yuppie cokehead dropping dead on their weekly 5k.

https://static.independent.co.uk/2022/05/19/13/1240711133.jpg?quality=75&width=982&height=726&auto=webp

Fingers crossed.

[Pepe]

I don't believe all heat pumps are set up/able to be used for cooling. We have a heatpump but as far as I'm aware it can't be used to cool.

The underlying thermodynamic principle works both ways. All that is needed is a reversing valve. I assume that there are some heat pumps that do not include one, which seems like a missed opportunity.


When was I on a crusade to vaccinate toddlers? If the medical advice says they should then why not? I am vaccinating my child for a multitude of things so why not COVID.

Maybe because there is some evidence that the risks of side effects, while very small, might be larger than any positive effect from the vaccine, which is basically non-existent.

Required journal article:

https://papers.ssrn.com/sol3/papers.cfm?abstract_id=4125239


I read the other day that America uses as much power on air conditioning as the United Kingdom does on literally everything, so prepare to be guilted/taxed out of that in the near future.

Not surprising, considering how hot it is everywhere for half of the year. Also, these idiots seem to be allergic to insulation.

[Giggles]

I seen road information signs today on the motorway warning of extreme temperatures and to be “summer ready”. It was max 30 degrees anywhere :D

This new fad of any weather being something huge and dangerous is just another way to make us all feel like we need minding.

[Baz]

I seen road information signs today on the motorway warning of extreme temperatures and to be “summer ready”. It was max 30 degrees anywhere :D

This new fad of any weather being something huge and dangerous is just another way to make us all feel like we need minding.

https://observatory.db.erau.edu/generators/signs/output/20220718145338.png

[Giggles]

1548960195887468544

[Giggles]

You’d play some drinking game for the amount of times these arseholes have said the word ‘event’ on the evening news. It’s the same as a fucking spring day in Spain.

[Lewis]

It hasn't been too bad down here, but fuck me the news was on in the annoyingly busy gym and you would think the world was ending.

[niko_cee]

Heatwaves are the deadliest extreme weather event in the UK, and official figures show that two heat episodes in 2021, which were both less extreme than this week’s, led to some 1,600 excess deaths.

“I think that, assuming the weather forecasts are roughly correct, it’s very likely that there will be hundreds or thousands of excess deaths from the heat in the next few days,” Professor Kevin McConway, emeritus professor of applied statistics at the Open University, told The Guardian on Friday.

“It’s possible that, because there have been so many warnings about the coming high temperatures, people and businesses will be taking more precautions than usually happen in a heatwave, which could lower the numbers of excess deaths. I hope that happens, but I fear there will still be excess death on quite a scale.”

'Excess deaths' has to be one of the worst ideas anyone has ever had.

[Shindig]

I don't even think you can reliably quantify that. "Doris was too hot, y'see. Took years off her life. Not the virus she caught in hospital."

[randomlegend]

'Excess deaths' has to be one of the worst ideas anyone has ever had.

I'm curious whether the death rate drops in the period after a heatwave.

[Bernanke]

There are more excess deaths due to cold than heat yearly anyway, so by that measure mild winters and hot summers would be a net positive. :henn0rz:

[niko_cee]

Jersey broke their temperature record by 2 degrees today apparently, we were 0.1 off a record albeit 3 degrees lower than them [34 v 37]. That strikes me as quite a big margin to go over a record by, so I'm provisionally marking it down as a bullshit stat much like their 'sunshine hours' one which they observe from a point so elevated it can 'see' the sun long after it has, in reality, set.

[Don]

Waitrose was fucking empty shelves today. Fuck knows if thats cause all their delivery drivers are obese fucks who have had to take the day off or what but don't start inconveniencing me.

Football was fine, some 50 year old lad who had concussion from a serious clash of heads on Friday that needed his head gluing was out there and all sorts.

All in all, shut the fuck up.

[Pepe]

If it was ~38 C I probably would try to avoid playing at noon, but after 5 pm? Definitely playing.

[Pepe]

There are more excess deaths due to cold than heat yearly anyway, so by that measure mild winters and hot summers would be a net positive. :henn0rz:

True. Yet:

https://www.thelancet.com/journals/lanplh/article/PIIS2542-5196(21)00081-4/fulltext


People are most likely to die of extreme cold in Sub-Saharan Africa, and most likely to die of extreme heat in Greenland, Norway, and various very high mountains.

Who the fuck knows.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Yev knows.

[Spikey M]

A casual 31c in the car at 8:30 this morning :happycry:

[Manc]

Football was fine, some 50 year old lad who had concussion from a serious clash of heads on Friday that needed his head gluing was out there and all sorts.

Glad you've found your level.

[John Arne]

Back in the UK and loving the nice weather. Also, like Taz, I play football every week in 33 degrees and have not died yet.

[Yevrah]

Back in the UK and loving the nice weather. Also, like Taz, I play football every week in 33 degrees and have not died yet.

Next you'll be telling me you go on journeys in that heat too.

[Kikó]

If it was ~38 C I probably would try to avoid playing at noon, but after 5 pm? Definitely playing.

It's hottest here at 5 onwards.

[Jimmy Floyd]

The forriners don't understand how wet/heavy the heat is here compared to in the dry lands of the world. Completely different ball game.

[Don]

This isn't just any heat, this is Brexit heat.

[Yevrah]

The forriners don't understand how wet/heavy the heat is here compared to in the dry lands of the world. Completely different ball game.

I dunno, I've been to Thailand and Kenya in their summers and this still doesn't compare.

[Spikey M]

Cuba was worse than this and it was only 30c. The humidity was ridiculous.

It's just that our houses are built to hold heat and the lack of air-con that makes it worse here. Being out in 35c here isn't a whole lot different from being out in 35c anywhere else really.

[Boydy]

In the air conned office today. :drool:

[Jimmy Floyd]

Americans and Australians are all saying it's better to be in 40 C in their desert lands than 30 C here. Having been to Death Valley, I can sort of see what they mean.

[Pepe]

It's hottest here at 5 onwards.

It's not about the temperature, but about having the sun on top of your head. If the sun is on top of your head at 5pm over there, then nevermind. Wait a second, you never see the sun over there, do you? If there is cloud coverage, I will play on any temperature.


Americans and Australians are all saying it's better to be in 40 C in their desert lands than 30 C here. Having been to Death Valley, I can sort of see what they mean.

We have 89% humidity right now.

[Lofty]

The people who live in Death Valley mocking the UK have to drive their cars wearing oven gloves during heatwaves, so it's not the most comprehensive victory.

[Spikey M]

you never see the sun over there, do you?


I used to think this was a complete myth until I went to Uni in the Midlands. It is pretty much always grey up there. In the South East we tend to do pretty well. I can't remember the last time we had rain actually. Must be atleast a month ago.

[Kikó]

It's not about the temperature, but about having the sun on top of your head. If the sun is on top of your head at 5pm over there, then nevermind. Wait a second, you never see the sun over there, do you? If there is cloud coverage, I will play on any temperature.

Pretty much blue sky only at the moment but point taken. We're talking 32 to 38 between midday and 6.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Last night was horrific.

[Luke Emia]

Dog woke me up in the middle of night because he'd shit in his crate, then I let him out and what came out of his arse was basically water. Let him in the kitchen while I cleaned it up and he was sick on the floor. All this happened at 2am and by the time I sorted him and sat with him for half an hour before going back to bed it was half 3.

Coupled with walking into the office and it being 31 degrees in there at 8am it's not been a great day.

So I'm now at home working in the living room with the air-con on and it is pure bliss.

[Jimmy Floyd]

The best way for people who haven't lived in the UK to conceive of the UK is via Game of Thrones. London is like King's Landing (in pretty much every respect). The midlands (and south west) are like whatever the miserable, boggy region is called where Brienne spends one of the books farting around endlessly. Riverlands? That. The North is the north, albeit the real north has a lot more terraced housing. The Wall is the wall, and the wildlings are the jocks.

I suppose Dorne is, I dunno, the Costa del Crime.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

RISKING MY LIFE to go out and get a couple of scoops of gelato (Nutella ripple and peach & raspberry) with a slushie (blue raspberry and sherbert lemon) was a banging idea.

[Magic]

Imagine how bad your breath must be in this heat you pig.

[Yevrah]

An ice cream is an outstanding idea Mahow.

[Spikey M]

I like the way that compliment reads like it was written by an overworked Teaching Assistant receiving a picture from a student painted in their own excrement.

[Yevrah]

I'm working from home today and there is no air con here, so it probably feels a bit like that.

[Yevrah]

But I do really want a calippo and a twister.

[Giggles]

Rocket pop.

[Yevrah]

Amazon used to do a line in ginormous Mr Freezes, which I haven't bought for years, but I'd sell my niece and nephew for a blue one now.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Work brought round a box of Feasts earlier. I refused, unable to imagine a worse lolly for the conditions.

[Magic]

Work brought round a box of Feasts earlier. I refused, unable to imagine a worse lolly for the conditions.

Solero? Magnum? Both of them immediately turn to liquid in just above freezing conditions.

[Spikey M]

My work handed out Magnums earlier. Regrettably there was only white chocolate ones left and frankly I'd rather eat Mahows second hand Ice-cream direct from his arse, so I declined.

[Yevrah]

My local shop is out of every single thing with actual ice in it so I had to go for a Magnum, a mint one.

[Don]

https://encrypted-tbn2.gstatic.com/shopping?q=tbn:ANd9GcS95KrkoJbooQaDj3bFyR_q7g_9Qq0 W8KWvUoQmr9ZhbgzNqNtTxPWdSZMjeBcbD-AsLjSabZSycwsCzyZkBcLcDBSdIXP8&usqp=CAY

[Yevrah]

Well, that did somewhat cool me down but it was disappointing nonetheless.

[Manc]

Soup for lunch. Body cooling with every passing minute.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Get some Rowntrees fruit stack lollies in when you can.

[Giggles]

I'd be all over a Mr. Freeze too. Chocolate has no place in this weather.

[Lewis]

https://encrypted-tbn2.gstatic.com/shopping?q=tbn:ANd9GcS95KrkoJbooQaDj3bFyR_q7g_9Qq0 W8KWvUoQmr9ZhbgzNqNtTxPWdSZMjeBcbD-AsLjSabZSycwsCzyZkBcLcDBSdIXP8&usqp=CAY

.....

[John Arne]

Next you'll be telling me you go on journeys in that heat too.

It's truly amazing. Trains still work, old people don't die (even those without air con), and life continues. The media reaction here is genuinely bizarre - it's good to see that outside, most people seem to be acting relatively normally.

+1 for an ice cream - Zap's and Twister's are the bomb.

[Andrew]

Went to bed at 22.30 to get some sleep before work at 03.00 lol at that idea.

Ended up sat in pool in my pants at 01.00

Can't stand the heat in the night it just seems to hit you harder.

[Shindig]

London is on fire? Excellent.

[Ian]

Back in my day London was constantly ablaze at all times and unlike these SNOWFLAKES we didn't need these poncey fire brigades to put it out for us.

[Yevrah]

It being very hot = not really anything to worry about.
Things actually on fire = something to worry about.

[Giggles]

People being idiots is something to worry about no matter what the weather.

[Yevrah]

People being idiots is something to worry about no matter what the weather.

Why? There are millions of them the World over and the crucial thing with idiots is, it doesn't matter what you tell them, they carry on regardless, because they're idiots.

[Baz]

Had a nap earlier and woke up in what could definitely be legally defined as a puddle.

[Yevrah]

Been dreaming about Love Island again?

[Don]

Strangest cloud formations amd coverage and a sprinkling of rain. Please jesus let this be the end of the planet.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Women are truly baffling:

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/FYCZmbNXoAAaPIw?format=png&name=900x900

Are they just more pessimistic about everything? I can't say I'm as familiar with them as some of you.

[Shindig]

There's probably some biological reason because women are always moan about the temperature of the office. Although my office is fat city.

[Spikey M]

It being very hot = not really anything to worry about.
Things actually on fire = something to worry about.

The problem is that there's a link between "it being hot" and "things actually on fire". So what you're saying - after going around several houses - is "it being hot = something to worry about. Sorry Kiko. Vaccinate Embrios."

[Yevrah]

The problem is that there's a link between "it being hot" and "things actually on fire". So what you're saying - after going around several houses - is "it being hot = something to worry about. Sorry Kiko. Vaccinate Embrios."

I suspected someone might point this out, which would be a solid argument if all the bed wetting this week had been about things catching fire, but it wasn't. Not at all. And, after all the bed wetting things still caught fire.

[Ben]

I wonder if there was a rogue bonfire or barbecue involved. The mercury hit 39C up here and things just didn't spontaneously catch fire.

[Spikey M]

I wonder if there was a rogue bonfire or barbecue involved. The mercury hit 39C up here and things just didn't spontaneously catch fire.

There may have been something to trigger it, but the main problem is that we haven't had any rain down here for ages. The grass is yellow and brown. It's like walking on straw. Looking forward to hosepipe bans.

[Giggles]

It pissed down all day yesterday in Cork so we need to do a good bit more climate changing yet.

[Shindig]

Well, that was awful. No sleep and opening the windows only works if the air outside isn't incredibly still.

[Spikey M]

I suspected someone might point this out, which would be a solid argument if all the bed wetting this week had been about things catching fire, but it wasn't. Not at all. And, after all the bed wetting things still caught fire.

I mean, the fires in France have been all over the news and if you google "fire risk" and go to the News search you will find a fair number of articles warning of the danger. For example: this (https://www.plymouthherald.co.uk/news/plymouth-news/warning-issued-very-high-fire-7322483) from a week ago. There are others.

Edit: if you search Fire Risk on the BBC it appears they have indeed been banging that drum too.

[Ian]

I'm glad my joke having a dig at old whingers has spawned this FIERY debate.

[randomlegend]

Well, that was awful. No sleep and opening the windows only works if the air outside isn't incredibly still.

I froze a load of 2l bottles of water and at night have had them standing in a washing up bowl full of water with the fan blowing across them. Started it an hour before bed and it both cooled the room a bit and also provided a cool stream of air to point at myself once in bed.

[Yevrah]

It's now bucketing down in Oxford. Feels amazing.

[Jimmy Floyd]

I was on the way to the pub last night when the heavens opened for a truly beautiful 5-minute dousing. I arrived in there looking like a wet dog and yet everyone inside gazed at me with jealous eyes.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

It was meant to have started raining hours ago but nothing has happened.

Today was lovely here, 24ish with a nice breeze.

[Spikey M]

Still 28 here so another uncomfortable night, albeit 10 times better than the last 2.

[Shindig]

Getting home from the office to find the upstairs is still a muggy nightmare.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Pissing it down here now.

[Lewis]

I met manc sean for a drink on the front and he had a jumper on. :harold:

[randomlegend]

The hospital hadn't cooled down at all today really. I had to do an LP this afternoon and my scrubs were literally wet with sweat by the end. Grim.

[Shindig]

Another night without sleep. It was a cooler night but the sleep pattern's already broken. :moop:

[Don]

Absolutely sensational sleep here after the marked temperature drop. Live for mornings like this.

[Mike]

It's raining. I miss the heatwave.

[Spikey M]

The hosepipe bans are rolling out now. Buzzing for some clandestine 2am car washing and plant watering whilst simultaneously complaining to my neighbours about Mr 76's unnecessary and frankly, wasteful waterfountain.

[Kikó]

It was 38 here today after a 34 yesterday. Low 30s for the majority of next week as well. Frankfurt just bakes.

[Yevrah]

The hosepipe bans are rolling out now. Buzzing for some clandestine 2am car washing and plant watering whilst simultaneously complaining to my neighbours about Mr 76's unnecessary and frankly, wasteful waterfountain.

I found out today that the water companies waste 3.1bn litres of water a day. They are taking the fucking piss.

[Don]

Isn't that from leaks? We can't be investing money into infrastructure willy nilly mate.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Tonight is glorious, I've actually got the window in my bedroom almost closed.

I'm actually going to be able to sleep tonight without lying in a puddle of sweat.

[Ben]

Isn't that from leaks? We can't be investing money into infrastructure willy nilly mate.

Exactly. Shareholders come first peasants.

[Spikey M]

I found out today that the water companies waste 3.1bn litres of water a day. They are taking the fucking piss.

I remember learning about that at school, so this issue is atleast 2 decades old. I suppose it's easier to just include the "stock loss" in the price you charge the plebs than it is to dig up every pavement from Exeter to Edinburgh.

Thank you for tuning into today's episode of "Yes, absolutely everything is shit".

[Lewis]

The leakage rate is significantly down on pre-privatisation levels, and the old water authorities used to pollute rivers and beaches for fun (rather than just when they have to). There maybe should be tougher regulations in certain aspects, but the actual problem is that we haven't built any large reservoirs in thirty years, during which time the population has increased by [at least] a third.

EDIT: Not a third. From fifty-seven to pushing seventy. Point stands.

[Ben]

Plus regulation is piss poor. The Government had a well-publicised opportunity to at least be seen to be doing something last summer when there was that pollution story and they brazenly chose to ignore/allow it, purely out of fear of alienating the shareholders (who just so happen to be good donors).

[Lewis]

Our dingy windowless-yet-air conditioned sub-office has come into its own today. All the plebs on the main floorplate sat seething into their desk fans.

It packed in today. I was alright with a fan because, being a legend, I work in shorts and a t-shirt, but all the smart casual casuals seethed the house down and we got to leave early. :cool:

[Baz]

Was actually in work today (well, attending an apprenticeship module thingy in person) and wore shorts and T-shirt for it. The tutor wore shirt and trousers and was a sweaty mess all day. :harold:

[Spikey M]

3 days of summer left lads :(

[Shindig]

That first rain in weeks is gonna feel awesome.

[Baz]

What a glorious day. Paddling pool sorted, gazebo up, sunbeds out, peace. :)

[Don]

I'm in Porto for the week in 22 degree clouds. Seething.

[Giggles]

It’s still about a million degrees upstairs but the rain has just started :drool:

[Spikey M]

It's obscene here tonight. It's gone cloudy and the breeze has disappeared. Melting.

[Yevrah]

Likewise. Somehow feels worse than before.

[Manc]

Thunderstorms forecast for tommorrow afternoon/evening. Can't come quick enough.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Barely slept the last 2 nights, not holding out too much hope for tonight.

[Jimmy Floyd]

I've tried sleeping in this shit long enough now. Waved the white flag and just sitting out on the balcony until dawn, listening to seagulls slowly realise that they are lost.

[Spikey M]

That was grim. One more day (and night I presume).

[Ben]

100% humidity this morning. :cool:

[Kikó]

It's just summer.

[Magic]

Loads of thunder and lightning last night and it was pishing it doon the whole night too. :drool:

[Baz]

Looks like never ending showers are due to start around 2pm. Gonna be cutting it fine :henn0rz: to cut the grass before then.

[Spikey M]

It's just summer.

Please save the patronising microagression for your female coworkers, Herr Dawson.

[Giggles]

I think you’ll find it’s climate change seeing as we’ve never had hot weather before. The same way as the SIGNIFICANT THREAT TO LIFE thunderstorms are climate change because we never had thunderstorms before.

[Kikó]

Exactly, it's totally normal weather.

[Spikey M]

I remember the Sunmer of 1973 when it was 40 degrees every day for 6 months.

[Giggles]

The low voltage lightning when I was a young lad was great.

[Spikey M]

As far as I am aware, they've put the weather warning out because the ground is so hard that heavy rain could lead to flash flooding. I believe flash floods were pretty note worthy even before boomers were booming, so we can probably let this one slide a bit.

[Shindig]

Mint. If Durham floods, I can skip being in the office on Wednesday.

[Waffdon]

Loads of thunder and lightning last night and it was pishing it doon the whole night too. :drool:

Bruh, it started at like 10pm and was still going strong at 5am. Class

[Spikey M]

Sun's out again and it's as muggy as a Builders Cafe.

[Boydy]

It's overcast and a bit cooler here today which is nice. Dunno if we actually had any thunder last night but there has been some rain.

[Ben]

Why does every pattern of weather now have to carry warnings? I've noticed my area has a yellow warning today but the hour by hour forecast has a 50% of light rain between 7pm and 9pm; just cloudy the rest of the day.

[Ian]

Is it one of these things where the Met office has been doing this for decades but now media outlets are aware of it and it's an easy way to fill up space?

[Shindig]

So much for that rain. :moop:

[Waffdon]

Is it one of these things where the Met office has been doing this for decades but now media outlets are aware of it and it's an easy way to fill up space?

There was a warning for coke temperatures when we were driving to Edinburgh airport last week at 6am. It was mid 20s the rest of the week :lol:

[Ian]

Well I suppose you want it the right temperature before you bung it up your hooter.

[Waffdon]

Oooops. Cold.

[niko_cee]

Convicted by the autocorrect.

[Waffdon]

How’s the wind, Danny?

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

1575205053308321793

Poor bastard drew the short straw.

[Shindig]

They named it Ian. :cool:

[Spikey M]

They really should give them more scary names. Nobody is going to underestimate Hurricane Skeletor.

[Ben]

They named it Ian. :cool:

Who is "they"?

I like my job but I'd quit in an instant to become a professional Storm Namer.

[Shindig]

The people that name storms which I assume is the US equivalent of the Met Office.

[Manc]

Just the 1⁰C today. Shorts can't hold out for much longer.

[Waffdon]

Hoodie and/or a light jacket and you’ll be fine. Legs don’t get cold as long the nips are warm.

[randomlegend]

Hoodie and/or a light jacket and you’ll be fine. Legs don’t get cold as long the nips are warm.

Doctor-endorsed medical FACHT.

[Lewis]

Shorts Season ends with British Summer Time.

[Spikey M]

Only fat cunts wear shorts in the winter.

[Giggles]

Anyone who doesn't wear shorts in their house at all times of year is a miserable cunt. It's definitely too cold for them outside now though.

[Ben]

People who lounge around the house in jeans need locking up.

[Lewis]

I did a thread once on who knocks about their house in jeans and ready to go out clothes, and it was very much the split you would expect.

[Kikó]

Why would you not wear shorts at home?

[Giggles]

Because you can.

[Spikey M]

Why would you not wear shorts at home?

Because wasting money heating your home until you can dress for summer is cool.

[Pepe]

First thing I do when I get home is to take off my shoes and pants. Why would I add shorts? My underwear is just fine.

[Magic]

Fleecy jammy bottoms, slippers, fleece and dressing gown combo, all with that smell that says I haven't changed or washed in days. :drool:

[Foe]

Shorts or trackies.

Prolong the shorts with a hoody as long as practical, but unfortunately by mid November I’ve reverted to trackies.

We all have a blanket for lazing on the sofa though right??