Attenborough - Planet Earth II

[Ian]

Starting RIGHT NOW.

:drool:

[Magic]

Fuck sake you prick.

[Ian]

What's up with you now?

Also: The sloth. :cool:

[Dquincy]

What's up with you now?

Also: The sloth. :cool:

Ignore the c*nt.

[Spikey M]

Those snakes are the fucking devil.

[Giggles]

The first one was a massive let-down after the trailers, but this one looks more promising.

[Spikey M]

Was it fuck.

[P_3]

Jesus, that bit with the snakes was terrifying.

[Cord]

That tree making a strong case for being crowned total wanker of the episode.

Which is impressive considering the competition from those Racer Snakes and the fact that it's a fucking tree.

[Spikey M]

The tree wins hands down. You live off of sun and water you cunt, what are you doing that for?

[Ian]

Ants spitting acid in those crabs eyes, too. :(

That tree though.

[Adamski]

Anyone know what equipment this is shot with?

[Dquincy]

They used the latest iPhone.

[Adamski]

Good one, Mahow.

[Ian]

Baby ibex. :wub:

[Ian]

All them birds fucking off once the golden eagle turns up. What a boss.

[Cord]

Mountains seemingly being the most chill area on earth, it was slim pickings for 'Dickhead of the Week'.

So, it's had to go to...some smug ducks. The tree still miles in the lead for the overall competition.

[Ian]

The tree is such a cunt I was half expecting it to rock up and murder some of those rodenty things when they were catching some sunshine.

The rapist snow leopard was a bit of a dick.

[Baz]

I don't understand how people can watch [stuff like] this and praise it so highly. I find it so uninteresting.

[Spikey M]

Baz, you started a website about playing football in your backgarden. Pipe down.

[ItalAussie]

Pretty excited about this.

[Yevrah]

Is this shown anywhere in 4k?

Seems an opportunity missed if not.

[Spikey M]

Jungles this week so there is bound to be some utter cunts. Maybe even some cunty trees hunting in packs

[Ian]

If we don't get to see one of these swordbill hummingbirds impaling something other than a stamen I'm going to be disappointed.

[Ian]

That capybara's face had a certain :| quality when it was watching the jaguar bite that crocodile's skull in.

[Spikey M]

Fucking wasps.

[Ian]

Aaaaaand there's the villain of the episode.

Unless one of those trees turns up.

[Spikey M]

Utter cunts.

[Spikey M]

I thougt we were going to have a murderous mushroom then.

[Spikey M]

Aaaaaaand now we're the cunts of the episode.

[P_3]

Yep, definitely us.

[Cord]

No. Dickhead of the week is the wasp. As it must be.

Deforestation handily kills the trees and wasps, thus removing two thirds of Planet Earth's most notorious dickheads. Smug ducks beware.

[P_3]

Next week is going to be epic. Giraffe vs lion. :drool:

[Ian]

Planet Earth 2 werewolf game where the top six cunts from this series are the 'wolves.' That sloth is the main person on the good guy side.

[Spikey M]

That frog was a fucking hero n'all.

[Spammer]

I enjoyed the colourful bird showing its green thing. Because who could resist that?!?

I agree about the frog too - what a ledge. Hope he gets custody seen as the mother was nowhere to be seen.

[Smiffy]

Wow. I downloaded them and have just finished the first. Amazing views.

[Spikey M]

Deserts are bound to be home to some utter cunts. Betting suspended on the sun being the main cunt of the episode.

[Cord]

I don't want to spoil dickhead of the week, but that's a strong, strong entry.

[John]

I'd forgotten to watch this every week until now, and fuck me it's good.

Those hawks were basically the raptors from Jurassic Park but with wings.

Locusts will always be the biggest dickheads wherever they are, so barring the appearance of a human they've probably got the award locked down.

[Ian]

Jump to about 20 seconds in for some giraffe vs. lion action.


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pCJfRizqcs0

[Spikey M]

Right, this mole is the hero of the episode. G'wan son.

[Spikey M]

There he is lads. There's your cunt.

[Cord]

Very difficult choice this week.

The butcher bird was an over the top theatrical villain, while the locust just a steady super efficient arsewipe. A sort of Heydrich vs Eichmann of a choice.

I even considered going all conceptual and giving it to the Sun. I think ultimately the butcher bird deserves it for sheer sadism.

[Spikey M]

Don't forget the Chameleon. The prick let the beetles clime a mountain and drink before he killed them because he couldn't be arsed.

[Ian]

Top three heroes of the week:

#3 - Giraffe Twatting lions is all well and good but Big Dave had already told us they shouldn't be wasting their time trying to eat you in the first place. Still, you trampled a fucking lion so fair play.

#2 - Them birds flying a hundred miles a day for water Top dad-ing, that. Flying for fucking ages, risking being eaten, just to dip your balls in a pond so you can feed the kids.

#1 - The sand mole thing Hunting beasties blind is pretty swish. Appearing behind a big one like fucking Batman and dragging it into the sand is superb. Well, if Batman ate goons, I guess.

[Cord]

Don't forget the Chameleon. The prick let the beetles clime a mountain and drink before he killed them because he couldn't be arsed.

I'll be honest, I have a soft spot for Chameleons, hence not featuring in the awards. I'll admit that was certainly a bit bad form. Deserts must win some sort of prize for the most dickhead filled regions on earth.

Not massively looking forward to next week. Plains (aka lots of sodding lions) are always a bit dull.

[Ian]

Didn't mind the lions this week, it was different lionyness to the usual in these documentaries. Not overly excited to see more standard fare (oh look, they're attacking a buffalo which will put up a good fight before being overwhelmed by numbers) next week but fingers crossed.

[John]

The Cerval stuff is fairly tedious. It's like watching a domestic cat playing in the garden.

[Spikey M]

The Cerval stuff is fairly tedious. It's like watching a domestic cat playing in the garden.

Poor episode all round, really. Seen it all before.

[Cord]

Dickhead of the week this week is the editor, who forgot to put any dickheads in.

[Cord]

All the animals in this park have just won dickheads of the week. Praise the Lord.

This might be the one time this bit of the show has been better than the actual programme.

[Ian]

All those ants swarming the camera box are a bit dickish.

The hero of the week goes to that big fuck-off buffalo getting those lionesses to do one. The widowbirds are a close second.

[Ian]

Awful free-running, baby-murdering monkey gang make an early case for dickheads of the week.

[John]

You never think about birds of prey divebombing into cities. Imagine pissing around St Enoch Square, forging a path through the billion pigeons, and one of those fuckers whizzing by at two hundred miles an hour to grab one.

[Ian]

I'm all for it if they'll have a crack at some gulls while they're at it.

[John]

Those leopards stealing the babies because it's easier than taking down a full size pig are strong contenders for biggest dickheads ever.

These birds nicking trinkets off eachother are quality.

[Ian]

That one turning out to be a male. :D

[John]

The look on the face of that bloke getting vegetables stolen was brilliant. More exasperated than surprised.

'Oh for fuck sake'

Strong case for heroes of the week on comedy value alone.

[Ian]

For fuck's sake. :(

[John]

Those turtles. :(

Again, we're the biggest dickheads purely by existing.

[Ian]

Lots of baby-killing things contending for dickheads of the week.

While we are the correct answer I don't think we're really eligible for the award. Much like Attenborough's impending death, because he looks old as fuck.

[Cord]

Pigeons. I don't like them.

The one that escaped from the Catfish is dickhead of the week.

[ItalAussie]

Those leopards stealing the babies because it's easier than taking down a full size pig are strong contenders for biggest dickheads ever.

These birds nicking trinkets off eachother are quality.

In fairness, it's been a bad series for the predators so far. The lions can't seem to catch a damn thing, and the wolf looked so despondent after the baby caribou outran it.

[Disco]

Pigeons. I don't like them.

You and Manc (it was him wasn't it?) should get together.

[John]

In fairness, it's been a bad series for the predators so far. The lions can't seem to catch a damn thing, and the wolf looked so despondent after the baby caribou outran it.

The hyenas this week were great. The giraffe putting a lion into orbit was lovely, but the best predator donning of the series is the crew of baby ibex tormenting the Arctic fox.

[Giggles]

Why is everyone losing their shit and welling up over the end of it? Twitter is a river of tears.

[Yevrah]

The BBC has a 7 minute clip of this on iplayer in Ultra HD as part of the testing they're doing.

It looks amazing.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Why is everyone losing their shit and welling up over the end of it? Twitter is a river of tears.

This one tickled me when it popped up on my feed:

Nick Pettigrew ‏@Nick_Pettigrew 3h3 hours ago
Planet Earth. A rebuttal to 2016. Pro-environment, pro-expert, pro-BBC, pro-peace & a beloved icon abides. It's what we can be if we try.

[ItalAussie]

So I never watched Planet Earth. I've really enjoyed this one though, so is it worth going back and watching the original?

[ItalAussie]

Also, like all sequels, this should follow the Fast and the Furious sequel-naming conventions.

Planet Earth. 2 Planet 2 Earth. Planet Earth: Tokyo Drift.

I don't know what the third one would be, but I'd watch the hell out of it.

[John]

Planet Earth: Continental Drift, surely.

The first one won't look quite as jaw dropping now as portions of this one did, but it's still exceptional.

[Lewis]

I finally caught up with this. Does David Attenborough actually have any involvement in these things now beyond narrating them (and turning up at the end to lament his presumably massive house putting some birds out)? He obviously doesn't get out and about directing them, but does he have any input as to how and what they focus on? If not, that is reassuring for when he dies.

[Lewis]

Also, how hard would it be to just pay some local idiot[s] to collect those daft turtles in a bucket and dump them in the sea?

[John]

He isn't a listed producer, but you'd have to assume the people behind the scenes will still be going to him for advice on that stuff. They'd need to thick not to.

[ItalAussie]

Also, how hard would it be to just pay some local idiot[s] to collect those daft turtles in a bucket and dump them in the sea?

That's actually the one shoot in the whole series that they got permission to interfere with, because it's not really a "natural" thing to occur. They did round the turtles up afterwards.

There are charities that do it, I think.

[Pepe]

Started watching this, well the first one I am guessing. Three episodes in and it's superb.

[Bernanke]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6zOarcL1BSc

This video. :drool: That whale ending had me laughing for minutes.

[Ian]

Blue Planet 2 tonight, lads.

We just using this or moar freds-ing it?