[FOOTBALL] Halloween Weekend Football

[Weaver]

Friday
QPR vs Brentford - Sky Sports, 19:45

Saturday
Sunderland vs Arsenal - Sky Sports, 12:30
Man Utd vs Burnley
Middlesbrough vs Bournemouth
Tottenham vs Leicester City
Watford vs Hull
West Brom vs Manchester City
Crystal Palace vs Liverpool - BT Sport, 17:30

Aberdeen vs Celtic - Sky Sports, 12:00
Blackburn vs Wolves - Sky Sports, 17:30
Juventus vs Napoli - BT Sport, 19:45

Sunday
Everton vs West Ham - Sky Sports, 13:30
Southampton vs Chelsea - Sky Sports, 16:00

Birmingham vs Aston Villa - Sky Sports, 12:00

Monday
Stoke vs Swansea - Sky Sports, 20:00

[niko_cee]

Benteke sure to haunt Liverpool this weekend. He used to consistently take the piss as a Villa player so Christ knows what he'll be like now he has a score to settle.

[Smiffy]

.....

[Jimmy Floyd]

We're getting nowt at Southampton, or at best a draw. They're a very good side.

[Giggles]

Fifteen 2-0 home wins.

[Reg]

Sunderland haven't kept a clean sheet in the league and have 2 points from 9 games. That's a bold prediction.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Davey Moyes needs a break. A spell in Scotland would do him good. Maybe even national manager if Wee Gordon gets the bullet.

[Giggles]

Considering how much the media here have been raving about Scott Hogan, he looks bloody awful.

[Smiffy]

.....

[Adamski]

Friday
QPR vs Brentford

Saturday
Sunderland vs Arsenal - 0-0'er
Man Utd vs Burnley - 0-0'er
Middlesbrough vs Bournemouth - Bournemouth concede late on. 1-1.
Tottenham vs Leicester City - Both teams cancel the other out. 1-1.
Watford vs Hull - Hull's manager is a twat. 'mon the Hornets.
West Brom vs Manchester City -No way he loses again. Not against WBA.
Crystal Palace vs Liverpool - Benteke, obviously. Kelly having a worldy if he still features at all.

Aberdeen vs Celtic Easy 3-0 win for Celtic
Blackburn vs Wolves -New manager yet? If not, still Wolves. Surprised Venky's still at Rovers.
Juventus vs Napoli - You know who's scoring the winner. £££

Sunday
Everton vs West Ham - West Ham with Payet showing Barkley how to be an asset.
Southampton vs Chelsea -I don't think Chelsea are great but I'm coming around to Conte.

Birmingham vs Aston Villa - Because who the hell backs Villa?

Monday
Stoke vs Swansea - Hughes confirming that Stokes bad run is behind them.

What in the name of fuck :D.

[Boydy]

He does this most weeks now.

[Pleb]

The sacked one will probably get his usual Burnley 1-0 or worse.

[Kikó]

We're going to smash Burnley. Let's not be daft and suggest Dyche is anything but a gimp.

[Shindig]

Newcastle has a new record holder this week. Turns out Jimmy Lawrence lied about his age to get into football in 1911. 496 appearances, the last coming at the age of 43.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Sunderland need to go down and stay down.

[Max Power]

They are complete shit and not even in a funny or entertaining way.

Arsenal could get four or five if they really fancy it

[phonics]

Won't have it. David Moyes is a mastermind tactician. Pretty sure I heard him shout 'Defense' five times in a row on the pitchside mics.

P.S. This Khasri bloke is dire.

[phonics]

John O'Shea has given the arm band away and walked off the pitch and Sunderland don't even have anyone ready. What are they not crap at?

[Jimmy Floyd]

I don't think there's any way back this time. Big Sam should give it a massive swerve.

[Smiffy]

.....

[Yevrah]

Moyes is in full on bunker mode as well.

I'd feel sorry for him, but he must have made more from being a bit crap over the last 3 years than he did from his entire career to that point.

[Jimmy Floyd]

If they score this it'll put Oxlade's laughable wastefulness into some focus.

[phonics]

lol

[Jimmy Floyd]

The Sanchez one was a clear penalty, but first rule applies and I'm enjoying the Alan Smith seethe quite a lot.

[Max Power]

So causal from Arsenal. Should have killed this off ages ago but have been strolling

[The Merse]

Saw that coming from the moment Elneny and Ox sauntered past the Iwobi pull back and then proceeded to make no effort to turn around, never mind get back and defend.

Also saw it being a pen. Whatmore being shit and all and Cech being a big fan of bringing down players in on goal. It's just so sodding predictable.

[Boydy]

I watched about five minutes earlier and they seemed to want to pass it into the net.


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6yN2H3--1aw

Yes.

[phonics]

Giorud :cool:

[phonics]

Literally taking the piss now.

[Shindig]

Oof. Poor mackems.

[Gray Fox]

I stopped watching for 10 minutes at 1-1. Now 4-1. What happened?

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Good 0-0 there.

[Gray Fox]

Did they just say Jack Rodwell has never won a game for Sunderland? What the fuck.

He's well on course to smash Bales record at Tottenham back in the day. When Rodwell has started, Sunderland have never won I believe.

[Yevrah]

Yep, 33 games now.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Sounds like Mourinho has lost the plot again. He should probably see a doctor, bless him.

[John Arne]

Mourinho sent to the stands for being a gigantic arsetwat.

[Boydy]

There was an article about him in the Guardian during the week saying he lives in the top floor of the Lowry hotel in Manchester and never really goes out. And his family are still in London. He sounded pretty depressed.

[John Arne]

Tom Heaton appears to have transformed into a Buffon-Schmeichel hybrid.

[Jimmy Floyd]

There was an article about him in the Guardian during the week saying he lives in the top floor of the Lowry hotel in Manchester and never really goes out. And his family are still in London. He sounded pretty depressed.

How hard is it for Manchester United to rent their gaffer a flat? Is Ed Woodward still negotiating with the estate agent?

[John Arne]

There was an article about him in the Guardian during the week saying he lives in the top floor of the Lowry hotel in Manchester and never really goes out. And his family are still in London. He sounded pretty depressed.

Yeah, to be fair - I'm sure it's not easy. At the same time, I would have a little more sympathy if his kids were "kids", as it is, they are something like 17 and 20. He really should get a proper house though, and perhaps move his missus up there.

[John Arne]

That's never a red card. He clearly slips - you can see from a miles away.

Clattenburg loves it, the cunt.

[Magic]

:harold:

[John Arne]

Does Zlatan have it in his contract that he can't be subbed?

[Boydy]

Yeah, to be fair - I'm sure it's not easy. At the same time, I would have a little more sympathy if his kids were "kids", as it is, they are something like 17 and 20. He really should get a proper house though, and perhaps move his missus up there.

Yeah, it said their ages in the article but it sounded like he still missed them. The 17 year old probably still lives at home (they maybe both do, I don't know) so the wife is maybe staying there for him (I think the 17 year old was his son).

But yeah, why he can't just get a house, I don't know.

And he was moaning about paparazzi. Wouldn't they probably be worse in London than in Manchester?

[John Arne]

Living in a hotel in Manchester city centre isn't going to help the problem of the paparazzi, too.

Get a little town house in Alderley Edge, Prestbury or Wilmslow and you're (relatively) hassle free.

[Giggles]

For a job he coveted so much, he still very much seems to be treating it as a temporary thing, which is really strange.

[Magic]

He's gone at end of the season. :(

[John Arne]

Tom Heaton was immense.

[Smiffy]

.....

[Kikó]

We're going to smash Burnley. Let's not be daft and suggest Dyche is anything but a gimp.

Nailed it.

[Max Power]

Finally looking like a proper team again in the league. Spurs the better side but we were a lot more solid and a threat on the break.

Bobby Maddley defo one of the worst refs in the league though. You really can tell the difference between losers like him, John Moss and the like compared to guys like Clattenberg and Oliver.

Wrap up CL qualification on Weds and we'll start climbing the table :nodd:

[Magic]

What a fucking result. :drool:

[Magic]

The stats in the scum game. :D

[Shindig]

I was expecting a rough match after midweek but we've held out. Mitrovic is back in form. Cardiff next. Eek.

[Jimmy Floyd]

I'll never tire of Ian Holloway opening each piece of Championship punditry with 'Well, the problem for *insert foreigner here* is he doesn't know the league.'

[Yevrah]

Sounds like Mourinho has lost the plot again. He should probably see a doctor, bless him.

I find Mourinho's seeming continual decline into full on breakdown fascinating.

[Jimmy Floyd]

I find Mourinho's seeming continual decline into full on breakdown fascinating.

I was giving him the benefit of the doubt last year at Chelsea based on his past record (and blind fandom) but combining that with his behaviour since taking over at United, he appears unfortunately to be quite an ill man.

[Shindig]

He's the kind of guy that would've got Pep's jobs if he was wiped off the planet. I mean, he should hold out for the PSG and Bayern jobs but I guess he likes the English challenge too much.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Watching Blackburn v Wolves in front of an empty Ewood Park, empty partly because of some protest against Venky's and partly because it's just empty.

'It's a results-driven business and that can be the be-all and end-all', quips the co-commentator.

[Yevrah]

Hold out for PSG? Surely that's where he'll end up when no proper (massive) club will touch him any more? Which we can't be a million miles away from.

[Giggles]

He should just take a long long break and manage Portugal in around 10 years if he feels like coming back at that stage.

[John Arne]

Interesting decision by the ref to wear a shirt that pretty much matches the Palace shirt.

[Jimmy Floyd]

He's better suited to the sort of club that, like him, has a bit of a chip on its shoulder. He'd win everything at City.

[Max Power]

Can see him rocking up in Turkey. Win the league with Galatasaray with a bunch of Mendes boys. Beat Fenerbahce and plant a club flag in his opposite number's eye.

[John]

Got my first glimpse of summer signing Matt Crooks today, and he looks like a howling pile of rubbish. Being twelve feet tall will help him, but his first act today was to miscontrol a five yard pass, miss the resulting tackle completely, and when he got the ball back because the Kilmarnock player was also terrible he immediately hoofed it out of play. Top signing.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Lovren :harold:

[Gray Fox]

Get Mignolet back in for fucks sake.

[John Arne]

I miss Lovren.

[John Arne]

Get Mignolet back in for fucks sake.

To be fair, there wasn't a lot he could do about that.

[Gray Fox]

Staying on his line would have helped immensely.

[John Arne]

Get in Lovren, you useless piece of shit.

[John Arne]

Staying on his line would have helped immensely.

Given how long the ball was in the air, and where it was, coming out was definitely the right thing to do.

[Smiffy]

.....

[Jimmy Floyd]

Looking through the Wolves squad, I see there is nobody older than 24 remaining in the squad other than token long-termers Ikeme, Batth, Stearman and Edwards. Mendes just buying a club up to place players in England for resale value?

[Gray Fox]

6-6 incoming.

[John Arne]

Ah, that's why Moreno has been dropped.

STOP the fucking cross coming in, you useless cunting twat.

[Smiffy]

.....

[Gray Fox]

This game is mental.

[John Arne]

Palace are almost as shit at set pieces as us.

[Smiffy]

.....

[Gray Fox]

Problem is when you press to the levels we do, if the opposition can bypass it, it's usually leading to a chance.

Plus having a mistake prone player like Moreno back there doesn't always help.

[Smiffy]

.....

[John Arne]

Has Coutinho dyed his hair red, or is my feed playing up?

[Gray Fox]

Send Zaha off ffs.

[John Arne]

Cracking pass from Henderson.

[Boydy]

Can Karius hold onto anything?

[Dquincy]

Tidy goal that. But why take your shirt off you twat.

Bring on Sturridge for a bit i reckon.
With our shit defending this is not over yet.

[Reg]

We had a sellout today, I think it was the first since the extension. 5-0 to celebrate.

Norwich's keeper had a bit of a mare. He looked like he probably weighed less than Baldock. McGovern - apparently he was good for Northern Ireland in the Euros?

Murray scored a hat-trick and he actually looked a bit fed up and unmotivated before he scored his second. Knockaert was fun to watch as always; we need to go up to keep him.

[Giggles]

We had a sellout today, I think it was the first since the extension. 5-0 to celebrate.

Norwich's keeper had a bit of a mare. He looked like he probably weighed less than Baldock. McGovern - apparently he was good for Northern Ireland in the Euros?

Murray scored a hat-trick and he actually looked a bit fed up and unmotivated before he scored his second. Knockaert was fun to watch as always; we need to go up to keep him.

Is Duffy still a walking disaster or has he settled down?

[Reg]

Giggles He's very solid thankfully. I was a bit worried when we bought him and he'd had a sending off and scored two own goals in 3 games or whatever it was.

[Giggles]

He'd a howler in our last game too, but hopefully he gets that out of his system. Decent potential.

[Giggles]

Don't know how Utd didn't score in that one. Was more just one of them games but they should get it going.

[elth]

Mourinho's either going to get fiery and fuck everyone's shit up, or have a nervous breakdown at the pace he's going right now.

[Waffdon]

Any particular reason as to why Aston Villa haven't filled that allocation out?

[Giggles]

Any particular reason as to why Aston Villa haven't filled that allocation out?

Because they're in the championship now.

[Boydy]

They've closed off part of one of their stands.

Oh wait, they're away today.

[Reg]

Quite like this one-commentator set up for the Roma game. Because he hasn't got anyone to talk to, there's no awful bantz, or meant to be self-deprecating but really just shit jokes. So he just calls the game.

Pity Napoli lost to Juventus yesterday. It would have been much more exciting had Roma gone ahead this weekend.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Angelo Ogbonna, Pedro Obiang and especially Simone Zaza all need shipping back to Italy on the first available steamer from the docklands.

[Waffdon]

Hazard :cool:

[Jimmy Floyd]

For some reason that 'Diego, Diego' chant really annoys me. There's so much material to work with for him. He's quick, he's sly, he'll poke you in the eye. That took me 5 seconds.

[Giggles]

Looking at the line-ups of the Birmingham derby on livescore, only for Alan Hutton (unless he's moved) I'd have had no idea which was which.

[Mellberg]

Any particular reason as to why Aston Villa haven't filled that allocation out?

More likely for the moon to morph into the sun than the away end not get sold out in the Birmingham derby.

[John Arne]

Austin sounds like one of those blokes you play footy with who shouts, swears and moans at everyone whilst actually doing very little himself.

[Jimmy Floyd]

We've magically become quite good and it's all thanks to Victor Moses. Remarkable.

[Adamski]

Looking at the line-ups of the Birmingham derby on livescore, only for Alan Hutton (unless he's moved) I'd have had no idea which was which.

You do take a lot of pride in watching and reading about football yet knowing nothing about the teams eh?

[Giggles]

You do take a lot of pride in watching and reading about football yet knowing nothing about the teams eh?

Eh? Is it because he said magically?

Is that a case of not having any reason to be a cunt so desperately clutching at a reason to be one?

[Giggles]

Ah you discovered those good old Quote and Edit buttons. Well done.

[Adamski]

Eh? Is it because he said magically?

Is that a case of not having any reason to be a cunt so desperately clutching at a reason to be one?

Having spaghetti for my dinner tonight x

[Jimmy Floyd]

We have absolutely pissed this. Complete training match, Southampton never remotely involved. If we play like this we'll be 2nd minimum, which has taken me by surprise because defensively our personnel is dogshit on paper.

[Giggles]

Having spaghetti for my dinner tonight x

So, so, very poor :face:

You don't even deserve to be called mini-john, he'd be embarrassed at such garbage.

[Adamski]

We have absolutely pissed this. Complete training match, Southampton never remotely involved. If we play like this we'll be 2nd minimum, which has taken me by surprise because defensively our personnel is dogshit on paper.

It is but it's massively to do with Conte's system. Ive thought for a while that guys like Barzagli and to a lesser extent Bonucci aren't top top defenders who can play for any team and be incredible but within these types of systems they are very successful and have the right level of protection from midfield and wing backs. Classic case of sum of all parts being greater than individuals.

[Adamski]

So, so, very poor :face:

You don't even deserve to be called mini-john, he'd be embarrassed at such garbage.

Apologies, I thought irony would be too much for you but it seems I was wrong (...that's a thinker, careful now)

[Giggles]

Apologies, I thought irony would be too much for you but it seems I was wrong (...that's a thinker, careful now)

Backpedalling jibberish just because you fucked up quoting your usual smart arse reply. Go take a lie down and start again later you highly strung little cretin.

[Boydy]

Haven't Southampton just been a bit shit this season so far? I wouldn't get too excited, Jim.

[Jimmy Floyd]

It is but it's massively to do with Conte's system. Ive thought for a while that guys like Barzagli and to a lesser extent Bonucci aren't top top defenders who can play for any team and be incredible but within these types of systems they are very successful and have the right level of protection from midfield and wing backs. Classic case of sum of all parts being greater than individuals.

Well if the Cahill/David Luiz/Azpilicueta madhouse, protected by Moses and Marcos Alonso, is going to prove a strong defensive unit then he's basically a genius.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Haven't Southampton just been a bit shit this season so far? I wouldn't get too excited, Jim.
They were great last week at City.

It was just that sort of effortless win from us not seen since the Phantom Manager was last in the dugout.

[Adamski]

Backpedalling jibberish just because you fucked up quoting your usual smart arse reply. Go take a lie down and start again later you highly strung little cretin.

Highly strung? :D I'm not the middle aged man who bites at every little comment on a football forum :D

I haven't back-pedalled. You said I didn't have a reason to be a cunt so I was desperately clutching at reasons to. That could be the foreword of your autobiography with chapter one being your ridiculous spaghetti nonsense, therefore IRONY.

[Dquincy]

Highly strung? :D I'm not the middle aged man who bites at every little comment on a football forum :D

I haven't back-pedalled. You said I didn't have a reason to be a cunt so I was desperately clutching at reasons to. That could be the foreword of your autobiography with chapter one being your ridiculous spaghetti nonsense, therefore IRONY.
Com'on chaps, no need to do this.

Let's name one thing that we all like about each other.

[Giggles]

Highly strung? :D I'm not the middle aged man who bites at every little comment on a football forum :D

I haven't back-pedalled. You said I didn't have a reason to be a cunt so I was desperately clutching at reasons to. That could be the foreword of your autobiography with chapter one being your ridiculous spaghetti nonsense, therefore IRONY.

Yes, because you replied straight after Jimmy's post and it made no sense. You only realised after that you'd replied to a post that was three previous and forgot to quote it. At least that made sense (well in the sense that knowing second rate Championship squads is vital for any football follower).

And you're still on about spaghetti? In a football thread where no mention of it was made? I'd take that lie down and ask yourself some serious questions about why it's still such a big deal for you.

[Adamski]

Yes, because you replied straight after Jimmy's post and it made no sense. You only realised after that you'd replied to a post that was three previous and forgot to quote it. At least that made sense (well in the sense that knowing second rate Championship squads is vital for any football follower).

And you're still on about spaghetti? In a football thread where no mention of it was made? I'd take that lie down and ask yourself some serious questions about why it's still such a big deal for you.

For shame I didn't refresh.

It's not a big deal, I'm not the one who bit :)

Quincy is right though, let's get the thread back on track and talk about players we don't know doing things we don't understand.

[Giggles]

For shame I didn't refresh.

It's not a big deal, I'm not the one who bit :)

Quincy is right though, let's get the thread back on track and talk about players we don't know doing things we don't understand.

You bit enough tothink every football follower should know Aston Villa and Birmingham City sides. You don't actually need to be such a prick you know. Pick another poster and model yourself on them, a less ratty one.

[Giggles]

Com'on chaps, no need to do this.

Let's name one thing that we all like about each other.

Errr, he's nowhere near me?

[Adamski]

Haven't Southampton just been a bit shit this season so far? I wouldn't get too excited, Jim.

I think Southampton have been fairly decent this year, Puel was getting some decent praise midweek or the week before. Has Andy vanished as well?

Jim is right though, no way should those 5 players be the really solid defensive unit that they're looking like at the moment. It's got to come down to tactics for me, he's got them all so well drilled and everyone knows exactly what they're doing that they are turning in some quality performances. You wouldn't actually think Luiz would be suited to a back 3, but when you think about it it's pretty perfect. He can faf about bringing the ball out and will always have a sprae man to cover him, especially one with Azpi's pace.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Azpilicueta's positioning in a back three is like watching somebody desperately trying to cling onto a kite in very strong winds. All the more entertaining for it though.

[Adamski]

I would imagine that would be Zouma's spot when he's fit?

[Jimmy Floyd]

Yeah, and the Davester can do either of the wing back roles, probably the left one as Marcos Alonso is a lot sexier than he is good at football, whilst Victor Moses is well on course for a sweep of the PFA awards.

[John Arne]

Is it true that Redknapp described 26 Nigerian Victor Moses as a "bright English prospect"...?

[Giggles]

Is it true that Redknapp described 26 Nigerian Victor Moses as a "bright English prospect"...?

792753552083001344

What a gobshite.

[John Arne]

Quality.

To be fair, I did questions France's decision not to call up Eric Bailly for the Euro's.

[five time]

It's not that ridiculous a comment, he wasn't asking for him to get called up to the squad like his old man did with Wes Morgan. Moses probably considers himself English/Nigerian considering he turned out for all the England youth teams.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Of the most recent Morocco squad for the World Cup qualifiers, only 6/25 were actually born in Morocco. Fact.

[Giggles]

It's not that ridiculous a comment, he wasn't asking for him to get called up to the squad like his old man did with Wes Morgan. Moses probably considers himself English/Nigerian considering he turned out for all the England youth teams.

He's still 26 with over 150 Premier League appearences to his name. Not exactly throwing some 19 year old in for a chance.

[Giggles]

Of the most recent Morocco squad for the World Cup qualifiers, only 6/25 were actually born in Morocco. Fact.

I'd say our own squad isn't far off that. Wouldn't be as bad as 6, but fairly close.

EDIT: Gave me something to do for the bank holiday boredom. Last selected squad:

Darren Randolph - Ireland
Kieren Westwood - UK
Danny Rogers - USA
1/3

Seamus Coleman - Ireland
Cyrus Christie - UK
Richard Keogh - UK
Alex Pearce - UK
Paul McShane - Ireland
John O'Shea - Ireland
Shane Duffy - UK
Ciaran Clark - UK
Marc Wilson - UK
Stephen Ward - Ireland
4/10

Aiden McGeady - UK
James McClean - UK
Glenn Whelan - Ireland
James McCarthy - UK
Jeff Hendrick - Ireland
Stephen Quinn - Ireland
David Meyler - Ireland
Conor Hourihane - Ireland
Harry Arter - UK
Eunan O'Kane - UK
Stephen Gleeson - Ireland
Callum O'Dowda - UK
Robbie Brady - Ireland
Wes Houlihan - Ireland
Anthony Pilkington - UK
Johathan Hayes - Ireland
9/16

Shane Long - Ireland
Daryl Murphy - Ireland
Johathan Walters - Ireland
Kevin Doyle - Ireland
4/4

18/33

Better than I thought actually. Always thought Daryl Murphy was English.

[Adamski]

He's still 26 with over 150 Premier League appearences to his name. Not exactly throwing some 19 year old in for a chance.

I wouldn't even say that was the main issue, it's probably more the fact he has 24 caps for Nigeria. Shocker from Redknapp.