News of the day

[Ian]

Separate film initially, unless you think Jimmy is somehow one of the people involved in his mate's dad's 1950s birth.

But it'll all tie together 18 films / 4 years down the line as part of the Jimmy Floyd Cinematic Universe.

[Spikey M]

Same film. It will be a series of mental flashes throughout ala:

https://img.gifglobe.com/grabs/partridgecloud/S01E01/gif/fFS2bH1XTalT.gif

[Disco]

Yev is writing it as a spin off series.

[Shindig]

That's quite the superhero / villain origin story.

Netflix presents: Dr. Tripe.

[Baz]

Yev is writing it as a spin off series.

Oh oh can I do the trailer please

[Spikey M]

Sorry, we've already awarded Lord Jerrington the contract.

[Shindig]

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-60183028

That was quick.

[Lewis]

Stuck up bitch.

[randomlegend]

Not sure which thread this should go in, but just discovered that the guy one of my cousins is married to has recently sold the business he set up with his mate (END clothing, think it's the sort of place Phonics would buy Yeezy's) for £850m.

[Foe]

That’s a pretty swish piece of trivia.

I’ve heard of end clothing so kudos to him. Your cousin will have a wonderful lifestyle now.

[randomlegend]

That’s a pretty swish piece of trivia.

I’ve heard of end clothing so kudos to him. Your cousin will have a wonderful lifestyle now.

Regretting not inviting cousins to the wedding now.

[Baz]

Not sure which thread this should go in, but just discovered that the guy one of my cousins is married to has recently sold the business he set up with his mate (END clothing, think it's the sort of place Phonics would buy Yeezy's) for £850m.
To an existing company? Seems like “JD Group” owns everything nowadays.

[Shindig]

"Mike Ashley wants to buy us out!"

[randomlegend]

To an existing company? Seems like “JD Group” owns everything nowadays.

Some investment group. "Carlyle group".

[Shindig]

I've heard that through osmosis somewhere. Probably from snooping around something like Topshop.

Jack Monroe's moaning about the price of rice going up. People on the margins might be damaged by it but those motherfuckers don't buy rice.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/p0bk6dt4

How is she nearly in tears over this?

[Kikó]

Empathy?

[Spikey M]

Attention.

[Vercetti]

Calvin Klein.

[Giggles]

Spikey takes this round.

[niko_cee]

Some investment group. "Carlyle group".

Isn't that the illuminati all ex world leaders etc investment group?

[Luca]

In the top 3 largest private equity firms. That’s huge. How long until you shamelessly invite them over for an Ooni pizza?

[Giggles]

He’d want to stop burning them.

[Giggles]

:D no shit.


1487687023385362432

[mo]

Empathy?

Not something this place really does well is it.

[Giggles]

It’s not something the world does well. Most of it is just for show.

Anyway, most of the people she’s crying about are still able to afford their John Player and Stella whether rice is 45p or £1.15.


.

[Shindig]

That's the point I was getting at. Having lived a skint life with skint parents, rice and pasta never got on the menu.

[Spikey M]

Findus Crispy Pancakes have held their ground against inflation well.

[mo]

That's the point I was getting at. Having lived a skint life with skint parents, rice and pasta never got on the menu.

Yes I forgot that every poor person has exactly the same experience.

[Shindig]

https://www.theguardian.com/science/alexs-adventures-in-numberland/2015/jun/05/top-bananas-shopping-list-survey-reveals-bananas-are-number-1-supermarket-impulse-buy

https://www.talkingretail.com/news/industry-news/uks-top-selling-grocery-items-revealed-26-11-2014/

They might not have the same experience, but they'd sooner pick biscuits over rice and pasta.

[Ian]

1487560618009939968

Is this somebody doing a bit that's going way over my head or an actual crazy person?

[Kikó]

It's brainwashing in its simplest form.

[Giggles]

She’s American the therefore thick.

[Ian]

Another good day for the police.

https://www.policeconduct.gov.uk/sites/default/files/Operation%20Hotton%20Learning%20report%20-%20January%202022.pdf


A separate WhatsApp conversation between two police officers:
o Officer 1: “I fucking need to take my bird out, won’t see her until next Saturday.
Then I have to work. Promised to take her out the Friday after. Making it up to her
from when I backhanded her”
o Officer 2: “Grab her by the pussy”
o Officer 1: “You ever slapped your missus?”
o Officer 1: “It makes them love you more. Seriously since I did that she won’t leave
me alone. Now I know why these daft cunts are getting murdered by their spastic
boyfriends. Knock a bird about and she will love you. Human nature. They are
biologically programmed to like that shit.”
o Officer 2: “Lmao”
o Officer 1: “I’m right though”


Messages sent by a male officer to a female officer:
o “I would happily rape you”
o “if I was single I would actually hate fuck you”
o “if I was single I would happily chloroform you”

Probably all just bants from people who aren't representative of the Met though, I'm sure.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

I assume they decided to just redact all the "Phwoar"s.

[Spikey M]

Part of the problem with the police is that you have to be a certain type of person to do it. Some will be people that want to do good in the world, some will have just fallen into the role, but - by a large margin - most are just going to be power hungry cunts that get errections over the idea of being in charge.

[Jimmy Floyd]

The last 20 years have been full of politicians calling for the service to 'reflect the communities they serve', so it looks like they're doing a good job.

[Manc]

Are we confident officer 1 isn't Dquincy?

[Giggles]

That’s some night out. I used to feel bad the next day if I’d knocked over a drink or something.


1488501575345709057

[Jimmy Floyd]

For a nation of 5 million you don't half pack these mad stories in.

[Ben]

Especially in Donegal where there's about six people.

[Ian]

'Levelling up' plan announced: Michael Gove says people in North and Midlands have been 'overlooked and undervalued for years'

"We don't know by who. Forgot about that, it doesn't matter because we, the goodies, are definitely, definitely going to fix it!"

[Ben]

All the idiots up here will vote for them again in 2024, now. Although my area specifically has been bribed with extra incentives anyway since going blue because we've got a Boris protégé, so whatever.

[Lofty]

Part of the problem with the police is that you have to be a certain type of person to do it. Some will be people that want to do good in the world, some will have just fallen into the role, but - by a large margin - most are just going to be power hungry cunts that get errections over the idea of being in charge.

Again though, they are advertising fast track detective roles for £24k a year. I'd suggest anyone remotely capable of doing that job that would have to make a career change isn't being enticed for that, unless they're truly a saint.

[Jimmy Floyd]

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/business-60206564

It never ceases to make me laugh the lengths to which these various brands of capitalist ghoul will go to convince themselves that rising wages are a bad thing. No matter whether it's boom times, recession times, inflationary times: pay rises are BAD.

[Ian]

Basically everything around this stuff is depressing at the moment. The cost of basically everything is going up and apparently set to continue doing so, Li'l Rishi's solution is a nonsensical loan that people then have to pay back which if they can't afford the £200 now they probably won't be able to in future either and did I see that in amongst all these bankers have had a big tax cut (no idea if that's the right word) to the tune of millions/billions as well? Or have I misunderstood some Twitter hysteria on that one?

[Spikey M]

The hysteria is not hysterical enough if anything. I don't think people understand how shit next winter is going to be.

[Ian]

I don't see what you can expect the Tories to do if you're going to absolutely refuse to be a hedge fund manager or son of an Earl.

[Manc]

The hysteria is not hysterical enough if anything. I don't think people understand how shit next winter is going to be.

Pray tell.

[Spikey M]

Pray tell.

The NI and Energy price rises will be somewhat offset by the heating not needing to be on as much / at all, from April, so the rest of the year will be pretty much as we are. But, next October the Energy Cap is set to increase again and, between now and then, inflation is forecast to continue at atleast 6%. Anyone not getting by easily now is going to feel the pinch, but anyone already struggling is basically fucked and there's not much they can do about it.

[Ben]

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/business-60206564

It never ceases to make me laugh the lengths to which these various brands of capitalist ghoul will go to convince themselves that rising wages are a bad thing. No matter whether it's boom times, recession times, inflationary times: pay rises are BAD.

Better still coming from a pro-Brexit cunt who sold Brexit partly on becoming a high wage society. What another load of bollocks.

[Ian]

A lie? Used to promote Brexit?

No, I won't believe it.

[Kikó]

Don't ask for a wage increase says man on 6 figure salary.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Don't ask for a wage increase says man on 6 figure salary.

But enough about your views, what does the man in the article think?

[Don]

https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2022/feb/04/experience-after-getting-covid-everything-i-eat-tastes-like-rotting-flesh

:rasta:

[Spikey M]

"Thankfully , rotten fish is my favourite"

[Pepe]

"I rarely feel hungry"

Doesn't look like it.

[niko_cee]

She does look/seem like an absolute textbook long-covider, if we're going down that particular avenue.

[Pepe]

https://www.bbc.com/news/health-59895598


And those most likely to have long Covid are:

women
35- to 69-year-olds
people with underlying conditions
those working in health, social care and education

:happycry:

[Spikey M]

3 of the 4 apply to Magic and Taz. Telling.

[Lewis]

In other news you wot mate? (https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-cumbria-60256915) Literally getting away with it.

[Ian]

Yeah I saw that. That sentencing is fucking mental.

"Oh limited involvement with a disabled slave? Oh well that's okay then."

[randomlegend]

It sounds like the Dad was the real villain and basically taught his mentally handicapped son to keep an even more mentally handicapped person as a pet.

[Luca]

https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2022/feb/04/experience-after-getting-covid-everything-i-eat-tastes-like-rotting-flesh

:rasta:


Now I barely eat 500 calories a day, but I haven’t lost any weight.

Yeah, sure.

[Ian]

1489584984235065344

Is this what they call levelling up?

[Spikey M]

Absolute bunch of cunts.

[Shindig]

It sounds like the Dad was the real villain and basically taught his mentally handicapped son to keep an even more mentally handicapped person as a pet.

Yeah, that's grim. Imagine getting into that at 16.

[niko_cee]

1489584984235065344

Is this what they call levelling up?

What's the beef here? If you open an account for whatever it is next year you get to pay the uplift without ever having had the initial bung?

I do like how little thought seems to go into these things.

[Ben]

New Tories: kicking the can since 2010.

[Spikey M]

It's also pretty unfair for anyone that moves out of their parents house at any point in the 5 years after the money is paid. Mostly young people. Which is very on brand.

[Shindig]

Crazy man ascends academia, becomes more crazy. (https://www.latimes.com/california/story/2022-02-02/ucla-shutdown-mass-shooting-threat-warning-signs)

His manifesto has predictably found it's way to Kiwifarms and is unintentionally hilarious.


“Da war is comin,” he wrote. “forward dis [expletive] to our tha goldhead caucasoid princess.”


"Doggystyle should sound like kids mashing their fingers into a birthday cake. SPLASH SPLASH SPLASH SPLASH like water getting smacked in the bathtub.

And then there's the page which is just BOMB THE AIRPORT in upper and lower case looking like a Death Grips album cover.

[Spikey M]

Who had Putin in the Surprise Manlet Bingo?

https://img.i-scmp.com/cdn-cgi/image/fit=contain,width=1098,format=auto/sites/default/files/styles/1200x800/public/d8/images/canvas/2022/01/30/29528c88-8582-41f7-a102-84687c3463a1_a60a13f3.jpg?itok=XwbeQXP6&v=1643555685

[Manc]

They're all Manlets. Rishi will fit right in.

[Don]

He's 5'6.5" apparently so yeah, half an inch shorter than the acceptable average height.

[mo]

Winnie the Pooh and Piglet there.

[niko_cee]

I see the Nadine Dorries comedy [or not comedy?] roadshow has rolled into Jimmy Carrville this weekend.

Christ knows what he was thinking with this segment everyone is up in arms about [1 month after broadcast], I'm sure there's probably some context to it [or maybe not knowing him] but you have to doff your cap to the beyond parody response.


Ms Dorries suggested the government could legislate to stop comedy people find offensive being shown on streaming platforms. "We're already looking at future legislation to bring into scope those sort of comments," she told the BBC.

Asked about a previous Tweet where she said "left-wing snowflakes are killing comedy", Ms Dorries replied: "Well, that's not comedy."

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/entertainment-arts-60261876

[Ian]

I don't find the joke particularly funny but it's very merry ch the sort of thing Carr does regularly and at almost any demographic you can think of. It reeks of "yeah but now the nasty joke is about me :("

And Dorries is at the point where it's almost worth just not looking into a topic and just taking the opposition to her. You'd be right more often than you're wrong.

[Jimmy Floyd]

The trend towards censorship on all sides is just an outlet for people's anger. I'm just not sure where the anger comes from. America, no doubt, like everything else.

[Spikey M]

What was the joke?

[Jimmy Floyd]

What was the joke?

Carr said: “When people talk about the Holocaust, they talk about the tragedy and horror of 6 million Jewish lives being lost to the Nazi war machine. But they never mention the thousands of Gypsies that were killed by the Nazis.

“No one ever wants to talk about that, because no one ever wants to talk about the positives.”

[niko_cee]

Something like, with regards the holocaust [BAD!], on the positive side of things at least half a million gypsies were killed . . .

Think it was prefaced as some sort of career suicide.

Edit - or that. It's actually quite good structurally and anyone getting offended by that has clearly entirely missed the point, which is hardly surprising.

[Spikey M]

That's just a rehash of his Mosquito/Africans joke. It's probably the same people that got annoyed at that one too.

[John Arne]

I seriously don't get people who make a fuss about certain jokes.

Like, you didn't mind the jokes about Cancer, the jokes about Aids or fat people, abusing children was fine, as was laughing at the Chinese... but [insert random topic] is bad and you need to complain about it.

[Lofty]

Can I claim to be offended by her literary career?

[Lewis]

It's a crap joke and the delivery was even worse. At least be funny with it.

[Spikey M]

Alright, calm down, he's just a bloke that works on the trains.

[Lewis]

He's just said that he can be sacked for being crap at his job. I don't think he works on the railways anymore.

[Spikey M]

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/av/uk-england-hampshire-60262877

It's disgusting that this wasn't front page news like all of the precursors were. :cab:

[Shindig]

Beauty's in the eye of the beholder and that, but plus size looks right out of place there.

[Kikó]

1490266325008199685?t=VCYfTk6QQn2FNDSwPFVqIQ&s=19

This is so beautiful. Twitter's leading moralist hung by his own words.

[Spikey M]

Beautiful.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Wonderful, he is such a smug prick.

[Foe]

Beauty's in the eye of the beholder and that, but plus size looks right out of place there.

She’s massive. I reckon a good proportion of blokes would pass on her on a night out, which is probably a measure she doesn’t warrant a beauty title.

The power of being PC.

[Pepe]

"I’ve always believed anti-racism is a process."

That term has existed for like ten months. You have "always believed" my arse.

[Spikey M]

We've all always believed your arse.

[Lewis]

Isn't there still an injunction out stopping people mentioning he likes (consensually) battering prostitutes? How anyone takes him seriously is beyond me.

[Lofty]

To be honest two out of the three Beauty Queens would be lolled at for telling a stranger they were one in a pub.

[Spikey M]

1490394034900197388?t=y0wvA-RHt-wMv3QRI-Vw1g&s=19

Scary stuff.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Top work.

[Shindig]

Heh. I appreciate that.

[Jimmy Floyd]

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-asia-china-60285068


The original ending to the 1999 film Fight Club, starring Brad Pitt, shows scenes of explosions and relentless fighting. But China's version simply showed a message on screen saying the authorities won and saved the day.

:D

You have to hand it to them.

[niko_cee]

I hope this has spawned a whole subgenre of alternative Chinese endings for things.

[Baz]

Third times a charm.

[Pepe]

https://www.insider.com/gorillas-afraid-of-shaq-miami-zoo-ron-magill-2022-2


"True story," Shaq said. "I've been to every zoo in the world, and every time I go to the gorilla section, they look at me like, 'Hey man, where your fur at?' For real. For real. That's how they look at me. They also look at me like, 'What am I doing in here and you out there?' And they always go crazy when they see me."

[Jimmy Floyd]

I'd like a full historical itinerary to support his claim that he has been to every zoo in the world.

[Pepe]

Every single zoo. True story.

[randomlegend]

https://www.insider.com/gorillas-afraid-of-shaq-miami-zoo-ron-magill-2022-2

Pretty racist, bro.

[Lofty]

https://unherd.com/thepost/captain-tom-foundation-spends-over-160000-on-management/

Beautiful, trending on twitter too.

[Spikey M]

Ha. Who could have guessed?

[Pepe]

Can't be worse than BLM.

[Pepe]

Can't be worse than BLM.

https://nymag.com/intelligencer/2022/01/black-lives-matter-finances.html


The organization responded to the criticism three months later by releasing, for the first time, some detailed information about its finances. BLMGNF said it had raised more than $90 million in 2020. It incurred $8.4 million in operating expenses, distributed $21.7 million in grants to more than 30 organizations, and retained some $60 million in its coffers.

:harold:

[Shindig]

I would love to know where those grants went to.

[Baz]

I saw this so now you must do too: https://twitter.com/donnaro16631684/status/1491165039990288385?s=21

[randomlegend]

She's probably just allergic to something like the dye used. Bad luck, nobody's fault.

[SvN]

No, she must get compensation!

[Lofty]

She probably hoped she was going viral but not one measly like.

[Spikey M]

Someone tweet a quick "lol" for us.

[Shindig]

Definite swingers. (https://uk.yahoo.com/style/breastfed-husband-trying-help-release-173644756.html)

[Spikey M]

"He was trying to help me release a milk clog to avoid mastitis"

https://metro.co.uk/wp-content/uploads/2014/04/s.jpg

[Spikey M]

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-tyne-60369098

:D

[Kikó]

What would have happened if they had cashed it? Would it have to be honoured?

[Spikey M]

I imagine it would just bounce.

[Yevrah]

What would have happened if they had cashed it? Would it have to be honoured?

If it didn't bounce you could be prosecuted for theft.

[niko_cee]

Slightly galling when the bank error is that egregious, you could probably have a stab at making off with it if it was a reasonable [obscene] sum but once you're talking x times Jeff Bezos' net worth that cheque is never going to clear.

Would be well worth trying to pay it in at an automatic machine though, just plead ignorance when the shit hits the fan.


"As soon as we identified the clerical error we ensured all 74 customers' cheques were stopped so they could not be cashed," she said.

:cab:

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-60393843

Prince Nonce has settled out of court.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Ideal for her I imagine and proably the strategy all along. Get to the point that everyone knows what he is, but also don't have to actually drag yourself through a court case vs British royalty.

[Spikey M]

What happens with the criminal side of things now? Can they still prosecute or is that it?

[Shindig]

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/technology-60314572

News just in, the internet is full of pervs and autists.

[Ian]

https://www.dailyrecord.co.uk/news/scottish-news/first-picture-cumbernauld-stabbing-victim-26238437

The quotes: "aw naw ah cannae believe chucky is deid ma best pal rip big man :("
The pictures: Machetes.

[Lofty]

The picturew really make the article :D

[Jimmy Floyd]

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-us-canada-60395241

This stuff in Ottawa is interesting. An actual culture war.

[Kikó]

Amazing what right wing/state funding can do for "grassroot" movements.

[niko_cee]

Everything's a right wing conspiracy. Or a Soviet one. Or both simultaneously.

I hope there were a slew of he's acted too Sloly tabloid puns.

[Pepe]

Amazing what right wing/state funding can do for "grassroot" movements.

Indeed. (https://nymag.com/intelligencer/2022/01/black-lives-matter-finances.html)

[Spikey M]

Scenes when it turns out Captain Tom had a secret black kid and they started BLM.

[Kikó]

Indeed. (https://nymag.com/intelligencer/2022/01/black-lives-matter-finances.html)

Wasn't trying to say it's exclusive to the movements I don't like either.

[Yevrah]

Wasn't trying to say it's exclusive to the movements I don't like either.

No, just that it's exclusive to the right wing/state funded ones, which you just happen not to like.

[Lewis]

If this is a crisis of legitimacy then the 'emergency' response makes it worse in the long-term. If you reserve the right to use extraordinary powers (with some truly scummy media support), and then don't use them next time some arseholes set fire to something they don't like, it will end up looking like you approve of those protests, and no 'we condemn the...' statement will convince anyone otherwise.

[Spikey M]

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/education-60405521

"But of course, some would say that he was right to try to wipe out the Jews, as they proved by being behind the 9/11 attacks. Oh. That's the bell folks, I'll see you tomorrow where we'll be learning about the positives of Slavery. Make sure you bring in your essay on why Ho Chi Minh is your hero, Tim."

[Shindig]

Wouldn't that just reduce every history lesson to a timeline?

[Kikó]

No, just that it's exclusive to the right wing/state funded ones, which you just happen not to like.

Er what?

[Lofty]

Queenslander is it me or is this Sydney shark hunt a bit of an over reaction by Aus standards?

[Queenslander]

I dont get it at all. I know on the Gold Coast they have killed the wrong shark plenty of times.

[Ian]

How could they possibly know it's the right one?

"Well, he looks a wrong'un..."

[Lofty]

Fun fact, in the 80's my uncle bagged what was at the time the largest Great White ever recorded and made his fortune from it.

[Raoul Duke]

Are they worried the shark has some kinda mad bloodlust now (I mean, it's a shark, what else would it be up to?)

[Lofty]

As always, this is the Jaws scenario where the carcass needs to be displayed quickly to keep those summer dollars rolling in.

[Spikey M]

Fun fact, in the 80's my uncle bagged what was at the time the largest Great White ever recorded and made his fortune from it.

Your family is fucking mental. :D

[Yevrah]

Is this your uncle Lofty?

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Frank_Mundus

He inspired the movie Jaws and then turned to conservation. What a dude.

[randomlegend]

Is this your uncle Lofty?

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Frank_Mundus

He inspired the movie Jaws and then turned to conservation. What a dude.

Can't be, there's no reference to his nephew Rollercoaster Guy anywhere.

[Ian]

Lofty's uncle the brutal shark murderer. :nono:

[Ian]

https://inews.co.uk/news/politics/police-shoot-terrorists-first-ask-questions-later-angela-rayner-labour-crime-1466145

The police have definitely proven they can be trusted with this sort of responsibility.

[Spikey M]

I can't see any way in which this could backfire.

[Yevrah]

What the fuck? Even Patel would baulk at that.

[Lofty]

My uncle is Peter Riseley and he caught the named 'KANGA' shark in 1987 off the coast of Kangaroo Island:

https://i.ibb.co/0Y8q1sr/hqdefault-8.jpg

Estimated 23 feet but they couldn't lift it out of the water with their crane so had to take turns cutting the head off.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

That shark had a family.

Your uncle is a twat.

[Lofty]

A rich twat.

[Spikey M]

Rod Stewart should be ashamed for involving himself in that.

[Manc]

This explains the shark porn.

[Jimmy Floyd]

https://twitter.com/murphy_simon/status/1494716804308029450

Ever more heartwarming by the week, this whole narrative.

[niko_cee]

Liz II has covid.

[Spikey M]

Liz II has covid.

I've covered it. In the right thread too. :nono:

[Giggles]

I've covered it. In the right thread too. :nono:

Thinking it's not news.

Off with Spikeys head.

[Spikey M]

*Insert worlds smallest axe joke here*

[Lofty]

I have a pizza axe, probably still overkill.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Posting here as I don't think anyone views the Winter Olympics thread anymore:

https://www.theguardian.com/sport/2022/feb/20/finland-remi-lindholm-frozen-penis-cross-country-50km-skiing-winter-olympics

Lindholm spent just under an hour and 16 minutes traversing the course in howling, freezing winds, leading to his penis becoming frozen for the second time in a cross-country skiing race, following a similar incident in Ruka, Finland last year.

“You can guess which body part was a little bit frozen when I finished ... it was one of the worst competitions I’ve been in,” he told Finnish media. “It was just about battling through.”

Lindholm explained that he used a heat pack to try to thaw out his appendage once the race was over. “When the body parts started to warm up after the finish, the pain was unbearable,” he added.

[mo]

28th and a frozen cock. Hardly seems worth it.

[Spikey M]

Gives new meaning to "blue balls".

[Spikey M]

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-60437894

Why the fuck are these cunts allowed to knock about together? :cab:

[Ben]

They look like they couldn't knock their way through a wet paper bag. "No weapons involved" the report says so probably not even a bruise on the plod.

[Don]

Would be great to be one of the chasing officers. Into that tiny room and a free pass to smash them.

[randomlegend]

Aren't you about 4 feet tall and 8 stone sopping wet?

[Don]

Sopping wet is your momma when I take my top off.

[Manc]

Sweating profusely due to the bomb strapped to your chest.

[Don]

Here comes the relentless racism from gammons'r'us.

[Giggles]

:D

I don’t think he even sees it himself.

[Don]

That's not Manc's first stab, he definitely knows what he's doing.

[randomlegend]

https://pamparish.com/wp/wp-content/uploads/scrappydoo.jpg

[Ben]

https://www.nzherald.co.nz/nz/politics/protesters-turn-to-tinfoil-hats-as-increasing-sickness-blamed-on-government-beaming-radiation-rays/FDCP6NEFJUQWWINL2GXI7OKS6E/

Whoever convinced the protestors to wear tinfoil hats is a genius. :D

[Baz]

https://sonichu.com/w/images/thumb/f/fb/Freestyle_Dance_With_Me%2C_For_Our_World%21.mp4000 01.png/200px-Freestyle_Dance_With_Me%2C_For_Our_World%21.mp4000 01.png

[Baz]

Make your own Wordle: https://mywordle.strivemath.com/?word=dooelph

[Ben]

Should have known.

[Don]

Wordle guessed in 6/6!

Somewhat spoiled by Ben, the cunt.

Someone told me about Octordle today. Quordle, Nerdle and to a lesser extent Worldle had some longevity but fuck off.

[Giggles]

Wordle is only for cunts.

[Giggles]

I’m on a streak of 52.

[Ian]

Wordle is only for cunts.


I’m on a streak of 52.

:D

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Streak of 26 on my phone but I've also bounced between my PC and Laptop too so I'm probably on 50ish too.

[Giggles]

A likely story.

I’ve 50000 on my laptop but it ran away so I have to do it on my phone now.

[Ian]

The things Mahow tells us I really can't believe he'd then lie about Wordle to impress us.

Now if he lied about his Quordle or Nerdle streaks that'd be a very different kettle of fish.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

The things Mahow tells us I really can't believe he'd then lie about Wordle to impress us.

Now if he lied about his Quordle or Nerdle streaks that'd be a very different kettle of fish.

I've not dipped into either.

I've dabbled a bit in Dordle but I'm pretty shit at it.

[Giggles]

Worldle is where it’s at.

[Pepe]

Isn't it basically impossible to not get a Wordle? I did them for a few weeks maybe, but got bored. I did a few Octordles but even those seem pretty much impossible to lose at.

[Ben]

There was one the other day that was a bit of a cunt, took me all six tries. But other than that, yes, it's fairly easy. My Mrs likes to do them with me so that's why I still do them really.

[Ian]

I think I've only failed at Wordle once and it wasn't even the day everybody else seemed to lose their shit about it. The days you're most likely to fail I'd say are the ones where you've got one letter that could be any of about five to complete the word and you're just having to guess.

But yeah, it's pretty easy unless you don't know many words.


Worldle is where it’s at.

I couldn't get on with that, if you end up in among the small countries it's just a guessing game.

[Don]

I'm just living for 'pzazz' day.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Just had my third 2 on today's word. I lost the other day when my brain failed to register that 'chant' was a word.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

I had a bit of a mare on today's word and it took 5.

[Giggles]

I be you get it in two every other day.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

I be you get it in two every other day.

I've had it happen three times.

My usual seems to be 4.

I'm not sure why you think I'm lying about Wordle.

Current streak is only 11 if that makes you feel better.

[Ben]

1499146380673261571

[Shindig]

https://features.texasmonthly.com/editorial/the-convert/

I mean, I can't really blame him.

[Spikey M]

She's no Shamima, but still :drool:

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Phowar.

Perhaps?

[Don]

The suggested articles on google really pulled it out the bag today.

https://www.bristolpost.co.uk/whats-on/shopping/bm-bargain-buy-allows-man-6761921.amp

[Manc]

Not much happening in Bristol I take it.

[Baz]

:wtf: It just keeps going.

[Don]

Must be a software error or something on Worldle today, people are going to be fuming about their streak ending like that.

[Spikey M]

Mine is fine. Got it in 3.

[Don]

Wordle is working fine but Worldle is glitching hard.

[Manc]

https://news.sky.com/story/man-who-received-pig-heart-in-ground-breaking-transplant-dies-two-months-after-surgery-12561727

[Offshore Toon]

I enjoyed the BBC Breaking News tweet notification for that. Huge news.

[Don]

https://missing11.com/who-are-ya/

[Alex]

1501270366085271552

Nice to see one leader looking past this trivial war and addressing the real issues.

I hope the Danes and Norwegians take note and issue a full and frank apology for the behaviour of their people during the Viking invasion of Britain in a timely manner.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

https://www.bbc.com/news/world-us-canada-60685663

Sssssnakes.

[Shindig]

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-us-canada-60695975

Sounds like an admission he's going to off himself immediately.

[Baz]

https://missing11.com/who-are-ya/

Got todays in 1. :lol:

Didn’t get yesterdays though because France.

[SvN]

I didn't get yesterdays either. I had no idea Payet was that old, or playing for Marseille. Being labelled as a midfielder didn't help either, as I'd say he's more of a wide forward.

Today's was definitely easier, I got it in 3.

[Jimmy Floyd]

I'm rubbish at these, mainly because I have no idea how old anyone is.

[CJay]

Yeah, the age doesn't really help that much. The problem is it could be any Tom, Dijk, or José playing for any of 100 teams. Surely no one knows what the majority of players outside the big European clubs look like.

And I only found out through this that Javi Martinez no longer plays for Bayern Munich.

[Don]

Yeah once you realise it's mugshots, the picture seems easily decipherable, got today in 1 too.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Yeah, dump the face and add career goals or something.

[Giggles]

I have no idea from the face on that one at all. I thought Payet was Vidal yesterday and it's all I could see.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

I have no idea from the face on that one at all. I thought Payet was Vidal yesterday and it's all I could see.

I thought it was Vidal too.

[Queenslander]

If we aren't locking up poor brown cunts for fleeing war-torn countries we are ripping them off for their labour.


.Foreign farm workers left with just $100 after week’s work as employer makes major deductions


."Aleki on December 8 last year did a total 30.38 hours and we paid $937.20, and then with MADEC's deductions and tax he netted $100 for that week," Mr Collard told the committee.


https://www.abc.net.au/news/rural/2022-03-10/foreign-farm-workers-pocket-100-for-a-weeks-work/100898622

[Giggles]

So it was a man then? What a way to write that whole story.

https://www.bbc.com/news/world-us-canada-60742364

[Pepe]

She is whatever she wants to be, you horrible transphobe.

[Baz]

How do I get this (https://www.msn.com/en-gb/news/newsmanchester/i-compared-six-supermarket-lemonades-to-schweppes-and-a-32p-bottle-beat-the-brand/ar-AAV551r?cvid=3006ba2cafd74a45aba8d5c11ffb7761&ocid=winp1taskbar) job?

[Don]

You're born into the sort of privelege that only a surname like Shufflebotham affords.

[Pepe]

That airplane crash...

[Disco]

Straight into the side of a mountain by the look of it, lol at the people posting flight sim footage claiming it's real.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Seems to have fallen straight out of the sky, very strange.

[Spikey M]

The Boeng documentary on Netflix is well worth a watch for anyone that hasn't seen it. Horrible company. I look forward to finding out how this was easily avoidable and how many times they had been forewarned.

[SincereTheRebel]

Seems to have fallen straight out of the sky, very strange.

Sounds like man just pushed down the steering wheel and nose dived to death

[Spikey M]

Sounds like man just pushed down the steering wheel and nose dived to death

The 737 crashes that had the whole fleet grounded were caused by the autopilot forcing the nose down because one of their sensors software was fucked. You have to hope they wouldn't let that happen again, but... well...

[Giggles]

Making it not happen again would probably eat into bonuses too much.

[Shindig]

Nah, this will be down to maintenance or pilot error.

[Spikey M]

Nah, this will be down to maintenance or pilot error.

They said that last time.

[Lofty]

As I learned during the endless safety case file videos I had to watch for the railway it's always the dead guy's fault, regardless of what the actual problem was.

[Lewis]

If I was the government I would leak proof of what Nazanin Zaghari-Ratcliffe clearly was doing in Iran so her parents get arrested. On the other hand, it could be a worked shoot to make it look like she really, really wasn't doing what the Iranians said. Who knows, but what did she want doing?

[Disco]

They said that last time.

Boeing will blame it on their slitty eyes again.

[Don]

If I was the government I would leak proof of what Nazanin Zaghari-Ratcliffe clearly was doing in Iran so her parents get arrested. On the other hand, it could be a worked shoot to make it look like she really, really wasn't doing what the Iranians said. Who knows, but what did she want doing?

We flipped the weak bitch during the 6 years, didn't we? "I love you Richard and Imma let you finish but Iran are one of the top 3 Islamic Republics in the modern world."

[Shindig]

They said that last time.

Unless they've retrofitted MCAS into older 737's, this will be something entirely different. Seeing it drop like that makes me think a collision or pilot interference.

[niko_cee]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d5yW1TGSiOU&ab_channel=SP343

[John Arne]

If I was the government I would leak proof of what Nazanin Zaghari-Ratcliffe clearly was doing in Iran so her parents get arrested. On the other hand, it could be a worked shoot to make it look like she really, really wasn't doing what the Iranians said. Who knows, but what did she want doing?

It kinda is interesting to read all the news reports and outrage, yet none of them mention that she probably was spying and the Govnt had to manage that accordingly.

[Ben]

I think the way she worded a few things in her press conference confirmed she was doing work for Government.

[Baz]

https://www.google.com/maps/@50.9012753,-4.3849665,3a,90y,47.89h,76.51t/data=!3m6!1e1!3m4!1syL56j9fEzy-gyTcX3RwchQ!2e0!7i16384!8i8192

[Shindig]

I wonder how much they want for that place.

[Disco]

It's grim up North Devon.

[Shindig]

Never mind, it's next door that's for sale. And who fancies a bungalow at my age? People that really need it. That's who. :dc:

[Don]

https://www.google.com/maps/@50.9012753,-4.3849665,3a,90y,47.89h,76.51t/data=!3m6!1e1!3m4!1syL56j9fEzy-gyTcX3RwchQ!2e0!7i16384!8i8192

:rasta:

[Lewis]

https://www.google.com/maps/@50.9012753,-4.3849665,3a,90y,47.89h,76.51t/data=!3m6!1e1!3m4!1syL56j9fEzy-gyTcX3RwchQ!2e0!7i16384!8i8192

:lol: