The NFL Thread

[Browning]

3 TDs in what, 30 seconds? Incredible.

[The Bruce]

Rex Ryan the big bastard might as well have not bothered flying over :harold:

[Browning]

Oh shit.... :D

[Dan]

What scenes :harold:

Bench Manuel now, or this is going to hit triple figures.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

The EJ Manuel show is quite good.

[Browning]

Time for the best QB of all time, Josh Johnson to get out there, surely.

I assume he's the best, because almost everyone has signed him in the last 2 weeks.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Even the Bills rush defence is a mess today.

[Dan]

How do you, as a professional kicker, miss three extra points within the first six-and-a-half games of the season?

[The Bruce]

Not practicing enough? :D

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Not practicing enough? :D
:eyemouth:

[Browning]

How do you, as a professional kicker, miss three extra points within the first six-and-a-half games of the season?

Well they moved them further away so it would happen more rather than being automatic, but it is shocking how many kickers are now struggling with them.

[Browning]

That's got to be the worst hurry up offense I've ever seen. Could have got a few shots at a TD in but they just took too long over every single play.

[Giggles]

Why have they all got poppies on already? Isn't that in November?

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Why have they all got poppies on already? Isn't that in November?

Some say poppies should be worn when the Poppy Appeal starts, which was 3 days ago.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

I don't know why the Jags gave it to Gerhart 4 times there, he showed no conviction whatsoever for any of those rushes. He never really tried to push, as soon as any sort of contact came in he gave up.

Mix it up or let Yeldon, who has shown a lot today try it.

[Dan]

What a pathetic bit of running back play from Gerhart there - just strolled straight into tackles.

Reminds me of Mark Ingram :(

[Browning]

Gerhart is really shit. What are they playing at when Yeldon is playing so well?

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Gerhart is really shit. What are they playing at when Yeldon is playing so well?

I guess Gerhart is their goal-line back, I'm not sure why after that showing.

If they don't trust Yeldon in those short yardage plays then give it to Bernard Pierce, he'd get the job done.

[Browning]

Or just throw it. What you don't do is run the exact same play with the same shit RB 4 times in a row.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Or just throw it. What you don't do is run the exact same play with the same shit RB 4 times in a row.
Or that.

You've got Thomas who has more TD's than anyone bar Graham over the last 3 years (I think that's what the commentator was saying) as well as the two Allen's who know how to score TD's this year.

[Browning]

That Gerhart shambles may well cost them this game.

[Giggles]

Game on. Jags deserve this too, they've been so inept since the start. Need to show something now and close it out.

[The Bruce]

Choke-merchantry of the highest order here.

[Giggles]

Bortles :D / :face:

[Giggles]

Nice catch. They have something in them after all.

And at last a non shit NFL London game.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Nice catch. They have something in them after all.

And at last a non shit NFL London game.
Which has come about due to some shitness from both teams.

[Giggles]

Which has come about due to some shitness from both teams.

I don't care what happens either of them so happily they are equally as shit as each other and made it close.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

I fucking hate 'forward progress', refs blow the whistle far too early.

[Giggles]

Horrible limp wristed throw that. Telegraphed all the way too.

[Gray Fox]

Most enjoyable London game in a long time. Many lols to be had at the Bills. How was Manuel a 1st round pick?

[The Bruce]

Best game since the Lions/Falcons last year. When I go next year it'll be for a competitive match rather than one with a vastly superior team there to dick on the Jags or the like.

[Pleb]

Patriots losing :eyemouth:

[Gray Fox]

Texans and Colts taking a beating, by not great teams too.

[Dan]

Definitely the best Jags game so far, I'd imagine. Manuel is horrendous though, Bills will be delighted to have Tyrod back for the next game.

The Saints are 14-0 up on the Colts :cool: Stephone Anthony looks pretty nifty, and Khiry Robinson has two TD's, so maybe we're finally going to give him a go over the other two steaming turds.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Probably for the best that Bill O'Brien be sacked by the Texans.

The Dolphins are stomping on them.

[The Bruce]

But JJ Watt is ace!

Shame the rest of the team is rank average. Well it isn't but y'know.

[Dan]

Choke incoming from the Saints.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Matty Ice and the Falcons :D

[The Bruce]

Thank fuck Troy Aikman is commentating on the Giants/Cowboys game! :face:

[Dan]

Choke incoming from the Saints.

Brees to Colston :hail:

[The Bruce]

A Giants rushing touchdown! Set your video recorders for that one :D

[Gray Fox]

Amari Cooper so good. Chargers defence is all kinds of horrible.
The Bruce I'll believe that when I see it :D

[The Bruce]

The officials in this Cowboys/Giants game are having the worst night I've ever seen. Even Aikman thought that flag on the Giants was harsh which says it all.

[The Bruce]

Just pack these hopeless Chargers up and move them to LA. What a pointless franchise.

[Gray Fox]

I've just heard Arian Foster tore his Achilles and is done for the season.

[The Bruce]

You have to think about sacking Foster off now if you're the Texans, he's never fit long enough to make a difference.

Dem Rrrrrrrraiders are pillaging the Chargers, what a pounding they're getting.

[The Bruce]

Fucking hell, a rushing touchdown and a pick 6 in the same game?!?!

Will be buying the DVD of this one!

[Gray Fox]

I'm watching Raiders @ Chargers and it's all kinds of awful from the home team.

Amari Cooper though.

[Gray Fox]

100 yard kick off return. They really are giving Bruce a show.

[The Bruce]

All in the same game?!? Usually you only watch the Giants offence play, but to score points on defence and special teams? :wank:

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Madness opening up this Wembley game :D

Amazing.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

They need to give De'Anthony Thomas more carries.


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7_uQW8XimU8

Black Mamba :drool:

That was such a good game. He had 2 carries, 155 yards with 2 TD's.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

The Chiefs are back :drool:

[Gray Fox]

Lions having another 'mare.

[The Bruce]

Stafford is doomed to be a middle of the road QB all of his days, he simply hasn't improved at all.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Stafford is doomed to be a middle of the road QB all of his days, he simply hasn't improved at all.

You've got to wonder where he would be without Megatron as well.

[The Bruce]

That's a good point.

Their offensive line has to be one of the worst in the NFL any time I've watched them. Not even being able to pretend you can run the ball and your QB getting planted on his arse every third play is high draft pick patter.

[The Bruce]

If Philip Rivers continues on this course of throwing hundreds of yards in garbage time and takes the season passing record, I'll be jacking the NFL in. Pointless cunts running up fantasy points when they're out of the game.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Todd Gurley really looks the part.

[Gray Fox]

What a fucking catch that was by Allen.

[Dan]

Falcons have turned the ball over four times :)

Sounds like the Wembley game was a tad one-sided today - wish I hadn't agreed to work today now :moop:

EDIT: Saints defence forgot to cover OBJ there.

[Gray Fox]

Falcons have turned the ball over four times :)

Sounds like the Wembley game was a tad one-sided today - wish I hadn't agreed to work today now :moop:

I think the Lions are still on the plane over to London.

Ravens lack of giving it to Forsett is highly frustrating.

[Dan]

OBJ has 3TD's today :face:

Bress just threw an INT off a turnover as well. We're absolutely going to lose this one.

EDIT: Dez is active.

[Gray Fox]

Drew Brees has gone mental. 6 TDs in one game.

[Dan]

6TD's for Brees, 4TD's for Eli. Are there actually any defensive players on the field?

Also, surprised nobody's mentioned Le'Veon Bell being carted off with a knee injury yet. Steve Smith has picked up a knock too, which means the Ravens are basically all in on Crockett Gilmore for the rest of the game.

[Giggles]

Result aside, Rodgers needs to get through tonight without getting broken in half :uhoh:

[The Bruce]

Glad the Giants could turn up for Drew Brees Appreciation Day. The Redzone commentator either has him in his fantasy team or Brees' cock in his mouth, partisan cunt.

[Dan]

Someone fucking cover Odell Beckham! :D

Has there ever been an NFL game where both teams scored 50pts? Alternatively, has a team ever scored 40+pts and lost?

[Gray Fox]

Eli is killing my fantasy football right now.

[The Bruce]

This Giants game is fucking mental :D

[Dan]

There's going to be 1000 total passing yards in this game :D

[Gray Fox]

This is surely breaking all kinds of records, right?

[Dan]

Great hit from DRC, but fucking hell when are the points going to stop here?

Hopefully not now.

EDIT: Been thinking of getting GamePass recently. Might be worth it just to watch this game in full.

[The Bruce]

Spags and this Giants defence :cool:

[Dan]

So this is the first game in 50 years with 13TD's and no FG's. If we convert this drive it'll be the first since 1950 with 14TD's.

EDIT: And there it is :D

40 second left. Plenty of time for one more score.

[Dan]

What a fucking game.

[The Bruce]

That's the most bullshit ending I've seen in a long time. What a fucking joke.

How can you throw a flag over a minute after the end of the play and then tack on a face mask foul from the spot of the fumble that had been advanced illegally? Get right tae fuck.

[Dan]

I missed pretty much everything after the TD, since my internet has decided to act like a total fucking shambles for most of the last few weeks, and only saw the FG at the end.

What happened? From what I caught there was a fumble & the Saints recovered, and then some kind of penalty was chucked on top.

[The Bruce]

Saints returned it, fumbled it and recovered it a few yards further forward which you're not allowed to do. There was then a face mask call about a minute after Payton moaned at the referees but not immediately after the play which added 15 yards on from the recovery spot not the fumble spot. Field goal is made when it should have been further back and much more difficult.

Sean Payton is such a smug fucker too, the arsehole.

[Giggles]

Shame to have such a game decided on a bullshit call like that.

[Dan]

Well that sounds like a suitably shambolic ending to the game. What's illegal about recovering a fumble upfield though? Not sure I quite get that bit.

Also, Steve Smith Sr is done for the season, and therefore probably done for good :(

[Giggles]

Well that sounds like a suitably shambolic ending to the game. What's illegal about recovering a fumble upfield though? Not sure I quite get that bit.

Also, Steve Smith Sr is done for the season, and therefore probably done for good :(

There's something about gaining an advantage from an offensive fumble.

Really sad to see Smith probably done. What a player he has been, and was still doing it at this age. Could be a hall of famer in the next 10 years depending on the groups he ends up with.

[Dan]

So are you meant to just let the other team have the ball because it's rolled forward one inch? Seems kinda strange, unless it's an obvious deliberate chuck forward or something similar.

Raiders mugging off the Jets defence already :cool: Fitz is out of the game too. Hopefully Geno Smith pulls an EJ Manuel.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Were some strong murmurs that Steve Smith would decide to have one more season, sadly he wont even get one more game :(

Such a shame that is how his career will end, although at least he passed Cris Carter for 10th in all time receiving yards.

[The Bruce]

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Holy_Roller_%28American_football%29

You can't advance a fumble for offensive benefit. Shit rule or not, why bother with refs if they can't implement them properly. That'll like see us fall to bits now.

I always thought Steve Smith was a gobby cunt, never nice to see some retire because of injury mind you.

Atlanta are being found out big time, their soft as fuck schedule had everyone pissing their pants about Matty Ice again.

[Dan]

David Carr's going to match Eli & Brees at this rate.

[DC]

49ers O-Line is abysmal.

Clowney looks nothing like his game-tape, and now he's injured again.

Carson Palmer has the playmakers he has needed desperately since Chad and Houshmandzadeh back in the early oughties, and it shows.

[Dan]

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Holy_Roller_%28American_football%29

You can't advance a fumble for offensive benefit. Shit rule or not, why bother with refs if they can't implement them properly. That'll like see us fall to bits now.

I always thought Steve Smith was a gobby cunt, never nice to see some retire because of injury mind you.

Atlanta are being found out big time, their soft as fuck schedule had everyone pissing their pants about Matty Ice again.

What a strange rule, but yeah, it does sound like it's not been implemented properly here. The original play sounds like one of those clusterfuck end of game college plays, like the 8 lateral one Miami just had, and having just looked it up it seems like it'd just be an incompletion nowadays.

And yeah, the Falcons have been proper rubbish since losing to New Orleans. Hopefully the same doesn't happen to the Giants. Thoughts on JPP coming back, by the way?

[The Bruce]

What a strange rule, but yeah, it does sound like it's not been implemented properly here. The original play sounds like one of those clusterfuck end of game college plays, like the 8 lateral one Miami just had, and having just looked it up it seems like it'd just be an incompletion nowadays.

And yeah, the Falcons have been proper rubbish since losing to New Orleans. Hopefully the same doesn't happen to the Giants. Thoughts on JPP coming back, by the way?

We have absolutely fuck all pass rush so even a one hand, one clawed JPP is an improvement. We were happy to pay him too but I doubt he'll be with us next year, he'll piss off somewhere else for better money. Stupidest off season event to happen to the Giants since Plaxico shot himself in the leg with his own gun. We were due an off field circus.

[Browning]

Madness opening up this Wembley game :D

Amazing.

That would have been the highlight of the day had I not started Alex Smith. :D

[Dan]

The Raiders are fucking legit this year.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

https://cdn2.vox-cdn.com/thumbor/GYV73LwKTDFYIKAOq4hBzvnjUHs=/800x0/filters:no_upscale()/cdn0.vox-cdn.com/uploads/chorus_asset/file/4219013/tucker.0.gif

What a guy.

[Gray Fox]

How I wish I'd kept Dan Bailey for tonight. :(

[AE]

My Broncos finally clicking :drool:
Rodgers just seemed clueless with the Broncos defense.

[DC]

The Packers offence is used to Rodgers having the time and luxury to scramble long enough for them to get open, same way The Steelers, Seahawks, 49ers currently do and Falcons of old used to. Broncos did a great job wrapping him in the pocket, and by standing underneath in man coverage it took away the easy short passes. At some point the Packers are going to have to start sending men out into the flats and running some seam routes because everything they did just split the field in half and there was nothing underneath or between the safeties.

Some of the delayed blitzes from Broncos were phenomenal. With the speed they moved it's impossible for the linemen to know who they need to block if they even feint for a second.

[elth]

Give how shitawful the Colts are this season, I probably want Manning to retire with a second ring more than anything else season.

[Browning]

I would love that too, but not if the prick keeps winning games without any TDs.

[The Bruce]

https://www.rdsenvironmental.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/02/eli-manning-super-bowl-trophy.jpg

Eli will be the only Manning with 2 Super Bowl rings I'm afraid gents.

[Ian]

Didn't bother gamepass-ing Denver's game as I thought the lack of an offense would finally get shown up and so just checked the score. :moop:

While in such a performance an offense has to have fucked up to an extent, did anybody watch it who can tell me how much the Denver D contributed to Rodgers doing fuck all? Phillips has done a hell of a job so far.

[Dan]

Is GamePass worth getting, Ian? Tempted by it this year, but my shitty, unreliable internet connection (which has just cut out AGAIN), plus the fact we're already halfway through the season, are putting me off this year.

[Ian]

I don't have it, I just use my brother-in-law's. Condensed games really are fucking excellent though.

[Browning]

Vernon Davis to Denver is confirmed.

[Ian]

Well.... hmm. That's interesting. Could be good for Manning if he has his shit vaguely sorted.

[DC]

Davis is a few years removed from his best, but he's not that old and Manning has historically loved himself some Tight Ends.

Pollard, Dallas Clark, Thomas and even Tamme were all productive - Dallas and Thomas in particular producing WR like efforts.

[elth]

While in such a performance an offense has to have fucked up to an extent, did anybody watch it who can tell me how much the Denver D contributed to Rodgers doing fuck all? Phillips has done a hell of a job so far.

The D was a big factor. Rodgers just couldn't buy time for any routes to develop and the Broncos weren't give up enough easy middle lanes for him to get the ball out quickly and consistently (and the Packers are too proud to go pure short and middle when there's nothing available long).

I really hope the Broncos stay healthy this season. One more Manning Brady conference title game plz

[AE]

Comparing defenses. Does the legion of boom match up to the current Broncos defense?

[elth]

Different approaches to the art of defense really. The Broncos D is more like the one that Giants rode to the Superbowl - good secondary, but it's mostly about smothering the offense at the line of scrimmage, rather than Seattle's suffocating coverage.

[Dan]

I don't have it, I just use my brother-in-law's. Condensed games really are fucking excellent though.

Indeed. Do you still have commentary, or is it straight up action only? Also trying to get a better understanding of individual players' skillsets & the tactical side of things, so having stuff like the All-22 cam & coaches film available as well is pretty appealing.


Vernon Davis to Denver is confirmed.

Good move, but there's still no way they get past the Patriots in the playoffs, even with their defence dominating everyone in the league.

[Dan]

The Colts :face: What's gone wrong there this season?

[AE]

People hyping luck like he's the next messiah. That's what's happened.

[elth]

Luck's hurt, the Colts spent all the free agency money on offensive "skill" players who are washed up and can't play, the coaches are too dumb to realise that and keep playing the washed up crippled veterans, they've blown 9 consecutive drafts, the have no offensive line, and they have no defensive line.

That's actually what happened.

[Gray Fox]

Kaepernick has been benched going forward.

[Ian]

Indeed. Do you still have commentary, or is it straight up action only?

Commentary as normal but if the commentator is mid-sentence when they switch to the next play he gets cut off regardless.

[Dan]

Gabbertime :cool: Still time for a playoff run.

Who are we tipping for the #1 pick next year? Lions are looking like a decent shout right now.


Commentary as normal but if the commentator is mid-sentence when they switch to the next play he gets cut off regardless.

Pretty much what I expected then. Might give the weekly £9.99 option a shot since I'm off work this week.

[Browning]

NFL has signed a deal with Twickenham for 1-3 games a year. Between that Wembley and Spurs we will surely get a franchise now.

[The Bruce]

They must be pushing for a franchise if they're only interested in hosting games in every available stadium in London. A bit shit as it means I'll have to travel into THE CITY to see the games, I'd have preferred them trying some other stadia across the country myself.

[Gray Fox]

I feel like what they're doing here is seeing how demand for a near full season of games works out. By 2018 there'll be what? 2 games at Wembley, 2 at Spurs and at least 1 at Twickenham?

A franchise is surely incoming now.

[niko_cee]

Go Silly Nannies!

[The Bruce]

http://www.nfl.com/news/story/0ap3000000572205/article/tennessee-titans-fire-head-coach-ken-whisenhunt

Whisenhunt given his jotters, I knew they weren't doing well but his record there much than I thought!

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Randle has been cut and Keenan Allen is going to IR after lacerating his kidney.

[Gray Fox]

Randle wasn't much of a surprise but lacerating a kidney. I had no idea it was that bad.

[Ian]

There's not really any reason (other than LONDON!!) to not have at least tried some games elsewhere. Cardiff and Manchester ought to have been considered and given the Claymores there should definitely have been one in Scotland.

[DC]

Luck's hurt, the Colts spent all the free agency money on offensive "skill" players who are washed up and can't play, the coaches are too dumb to realise that and keep playing the washed up crippled veterans, they've blown 9 consecutive drafts, the have no offensive line, and they have no defensive line.

That's actually what happened.

I don't understand why you're not playing Trent Richardson... :checkit:

[Giggles]

Rob Chudzinski has replaced Pep Hamilton as Colts offensive coordinator.

[Browning]

Packers/Panthers are on Pick TV this Sunday.

[Dan]

Just picked up GamePass & started watching the Saints/Giants game. Brandon Browner is fucking shit & gives away loads of soft penalties. Same goes for the rest of our secondary. The D-line actually seems pretty solid though.

Condensed games, however, are great.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Lions have fired their GM and president.

Started on A Football Life today by watching Terrell Davis and Jerry Rice, thought they were both excellent. What are the must watches?

[The Bruce]

The Steve Gleason one is outstanding as is the Brandon Marshall one for the more current players.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

I've watched the Eric Dickerson (well it was in the very early hours), Reggie White/Jerome Brown, Walter Payton and Doug Flutie (purely because my VM box labelled it as Christian Okoye) ones today and I'm currently on the LT one, which has just thrown up this:


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JRSnoZtssF4

:D

[simon]

A mate of mine showed me this last night.


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=av36l_9wj38

:D

I shouldn't find it that funny, but I do.

[The Bruce]

The embarrassment when he has to talk about it is outstanding too :D

The Doug Flutie one is quite good too if I remember right.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

The embarrassment when he has to talk about it is outstanding too :D

The Doug Flutie one is quite good too if I remember right.
I felt so fucking bad for Flutie after he pretty much led the Bills to the playoffs and then Ralph Wilson said 'fuck you Rob Johnson has to start'.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

I've just spotted that Tebow has an episode too, why? :cab:

[DC]

Because there are people who apparently have no idea about football, but have a disproportionate belief in the strength of one players faith in God over every other players faith in their God.

[Foe]

They're all good watches Mahow. There's one on Bill Bellichik and the Cleveland Browns.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Watching the Barry Sanders one and it's crazy just how deadly he was.

Any time the ball was in his hands he could just turn on the jets and make things happen.

I'd love to see a running back of that ilk in the league again.

His college stats are bonkers too.

12 games played in his final season, 2,850 yards with 42 TD's.

[Dan]

Started on A Football Life today by watching Terrell Davis and Jerry Rice, thought they were both excellent. What are the must watches?

Just seen these are all available through the GamePass archives, so I'll have to get on those at some point. Just started Hard Knocks, since that's on there too. Done the first episode with the Texans, then I'll work backwards by season.

---

Thoughts on Manziel last night, by the way? Still wants to get out the pocket & chuck it long all the time, and seems oblivious to guys wide open in the flat, but at least he's not as awful as he was. He wasn't helped out by Justin Gilbert being totally unable to catch a football either. McCown is still the better short term option, but I suppose there's no harm in giving Manziel the rest of the season to see if he can step up, since the Browns going to be utter shit either way & McCown's 36.

Tyler Eifert had a huge game, on the other side of things. Hadn't seen him play before, outside of highlights on RedZone, but he definitely looks like a player. TE's running seam routes are practically guaranteed a TD at the minute though - everyone seems to be unable to defend it properly.

[DC]

The issue is the reliance on a pair of safeties, and lack of cover linebackers. The league is too fast for a 46 defence or similar, and nobody really wants to run with a 3 safety set. Coaches seem to have settled on trying to get to the QB faster to deny the routes down the middle, while dropping 1 LB back per blitz, and bringing up one safety. It probably works 9/10 times, but when the LB is too slow, or the Safety isn't able to cover the much bigger TE then it goes for easy scores and big yards.

A few years ago the league had a fad of a box safety against the run until it was exploited by Peyton and co with their dynamic TE's. Any young players coming through the system is still in box safety mode. It'll take a next generation of 6'4 safeties with range to come along to change it up - but as it's not a glory position it's difficult to push youngsters out there it seems (they all want to be the hero corner, or the big hitting blitz LB). The nature of college football probably plays into that more than anything, the reason for the box safety being the growing need to deal with some of the disgustingly efficient running systems back then (which produced a vast array of underachieving pro runners).

[DC]

Oh and Manziel is pish. I'm not always sure I know what the scouts are evaluating to give first round ratings on a QB who plays like we imagined Rex Grossman played...


Is that Berrian? I think he’s triple-covered. You know what? Fuck it. I’m throwing it downfield.

Yeah, I see Jones open on the flank. But fuck that. Dumpoff passes are for faggots. I’m fucking Sexy Rexy Grossman. I can get that ball in there. And, even if I can’t, I bet I’ll be able to pull it off the next go round. I like throwing the ball long. It makes my dick hard.

What’s that? I should throw a quick slant? Fuck that. That’s gay. Button hook? Gay. Flare out? Gay. Screen pass? Kevin Spacey gay. This is fucking football. You can’t just expect wins to come to you. You can’t massage that shit. You gotta grab that game by the throat and rape the ever-loving shit out of it. You think a 5-yard out is gonna win you a game? You’re a pussy. This ain’t John Shoop running this offense. Sexy Rexy’s got the arm. The dragon. You gotta unleash the dragon.

Okay, I’m throwing it. Nice. Look how far it went. I look good. I bet I made that Pats cheerleader wet her panties with that throw. She fucking wants me. I bet she likes it over a stair railing. I can hit that with 100% accuracy, my dear. Mmmmmm. I am delicious.

Oh shit. Looks like Samuel caught it. Again. Oh well. It still felt fucking great to throw that shit. Tell me that wasn’t one of the prettiest passes you ever saw. You know what? Not only am I gonna throw it long the next time we hit the field. I’m gonna throw it even longer. Harder. You see that kid in wheelchair sitting in the end zone bleachers? I’m gonna nail him right between the fucking eyes with a Sexy Rexy fastball. Why? Because I can.

This is Rex Grossman we’re talking about here. We’re talking 210 lbs. of twisted steel and sex appeal. I’m not just a gunslinger. I’m a cumslinger. Throwing that ball long tells all the Rexettes that I am fucking out there. On the edge. Where I gotta be. The ladies love the danger. The unpredictability. Oh, maybe I’ll tease them with a pretty touch pass every now and again. But then I’m gonna go right back to pumping that ball out for all it’s worth. It tells them I throw like I fuck. That’s how we do things in the sexy business.

Tell me you’re not turned on right now. I am.

...but then Rexy got a first round grade too. :face:

[Foe]

I've just spotted that Tebow has an episode too, why? :cab:

Because MORONS out there don't know you could just read his book.

http://s18.postimg.org/41snfi3o9/IMG_1972.jpg

[The Bruce]

Tell me you got that picture from Google Foe.....

[wullie]

The time spent reading the book would be longer than his entire career.

[Giggles]

I can't imagine he's the first football player or coach with a book out.

[Foe]

Tell me you got that picture from Google Foe.....

Found it in a library sale (wut?) for $2 (bargain) and It became my holiday book.

It's worse at literature than he is at throwing.

[Foe]

Anyone paying any attention to college football?

The first rankings were released yesterday and it's a shambles again. The creaming over Alabama is just horrific. Despite losing against ole miss they are in the top 4 ahead of unbeaten teams AND teams that have only lost to top rated teams.

For that reason I really hope Leonard fournette (who is an absolute monster) tramples all over bama tonight in Tuscaloosa. The game on right now is notre dame vs Pitt. Notre dame have a legit chance to go to the playoffs too.

[DC]

A - college football is genuinely terrible for all concerned.
B - the ranking system is just there to keep the big boys happy and their gravy train running.

[Giggles]

I prefer watching college. Bit of variety in play rather than much the same thing over and over and over. Atmosohere, fans, stadiums, traditions, etc can't be beat either. It's just too hard to follow properly outside of the US.

[Foe]

I like college football. It's pretty exciting because a decent rb, qb or wr can absolutely destroy another team. It's less chippy patriots esque drive and more explosive.

Sure there's normally a massive gulf in quality. But it's bloody exciting watching a genuine superstar like fournette,gurley, cooper, doctson, boykin, Coleman etc running loose.

[Foe]

This cunt dalvin cook doing a great job showing my point in the first 3 minutes against number 1 Clemson.

Clemson are close to blowing their season in the first quarter here.

[Foe]

This cunt dalvin cook doing a great job showing my point in the first 3 minutes against number 1 Clemson.

Clemson are close to blowing their season in the first quarter here.

Really good game to watch as a neutral. I can't stay up for the main event but hopefully the bayou bengals get the job done. Clemson could well go the regular season unbeaten now and be playoff bound.

[Browning]

Remember the Packers game is on freeview right now if anyone's interested.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Bellichik is going to make the Patriots stomp on the Redskins here.

[Dan]

The Patriots :cool: Shame Edelman just turned it over. As did the Saints, annoyingly.

Miami are a shambles when they start close to their own goal line. Two duff snaps leading to safeties in a matter of weeks.

EDIT: Pats get it straight back again because Garcon can't catch.

[Foe]

Garçon is one of those players that you just love to hate. Just a chippy little prick.

[Giggles]

I just love when players turn to shite as soon as they arrive in Washington.

[Dan]

Kirk Cousins would have as much chance of completing a pass if he was throwing to himself at the minute.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Proper lol at that Titans TD.

[Dan]

We have literally the greatest secondary of all time :D

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Hands of stone Garcon.

[Foe]

The packers are really struggling here. At the start of the season they were looking really quite good. Presumably that's the calibre of defence their playing.

Oh. That lob by cam :drool:

[Giggles]

The packers are really struggling here. At the start of the season they were looking really quite good. Presumably that's the calibre of defence their playing.

Oh. That lob by cam :drool:

Receivers can't get any separation and the defense is just not very good.

Plus Lacy looks like he's become the spokesman for Wendy's.

[Dan]

Patriots strolling down the field using a tight end and a center at right tackle. It's all just too easy for them.

[Dan]

Meanwhile, we're about to lose to the fucking Titans.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Goodnight Teddy Bridgewater...

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Raiders have pretty much fucked all my bets now :(

Oh and lol at the Packers, Rodgers 15-0 record coming off a loss is broken.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

:harold:

BJ Raji looks like he could eat Ha Ha Clinton Dix without batting an eyelid.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Go go Olawale, get my bets back in bitches.

[Dan]

Brandon Browner is abysmal. Easily the worst player in our secondary, which is saying something considering it's pretty much entirely made up of terrible players. If we don't get at least one more cornerback in over the offseason I'll be amazed.

Nice to see our drive get off to a flying start as well :moop:

EDIT: We've gone back to start of season 'shit all over the field' mode. Give up a huge sack then miss the FG when you manage to get back into range, and now it's inevitably going to end with another shambolic Delanie Walker catch & a last second Succop kick.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Zuerlein really is shit this year.

[Dan]

How did we get that ball back so quickly? Oh well, guess we'll just have to lose in overtime instead.

Jags are somehow still within one score of the Jets, and the Raiders are back in the game against the Steelers.

EDIT: I cursed them both :(

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

If the Raiders win or lose by less than 7 points and the Rams win I will fucking riot.

Edit: Need the Raiders to get some points, even a FG would be tasty and the Rams to win in OT.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

That was a lovely play to win it from the Titans.

[Dan]

Panthers are choking :uhoh:

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Fucking Rams.

[Dan]

Antonio Brown's had a decent game today...What happens to the Steelers if Big Ben's out for a few games again though? Can't imagine it'll actually make much difference to their season, since the playoffs seem unlikely anyway, but it could be interesting to see if they do anything different now they don't have Bell to lean on either.

By the way, Blaine Gabbert has a TD pass to put the 49ers in the lead :cool:

[The Bruce]

Peyton losing on his last ever visit to the Colts would be pretty great.

[Dan]

Looked like the Colts special teams unit had already gone to the locker room there.

Peyton's going to throw for 300 yards in the second half now.

[Dan]

Manning's about to make history, and - more amazingly - Gabbert is about to lead a team to victory. Maybe.

EDIT: Gabbert immediately throws a pick :D Less than 5 yards for Peyton...

Broncos sign Vernon Davis & then Owen Daniels has a 100yd + TD recieving game. Standard.

[Ian]

If Miller has actually gone for his eye there, and on the replay it doesn't look good, they need to be hitting him with whatever fines and bans they can because that's just not on.

EDIT: Oh, was it Talib? Same applies, whoever did it.

[Ian]

Letting yourself get done for holding in this situation. :D

Proper thicko behaviour.

[Gray Fox]

What happened at the end of the Broncos, Colts game?

I saw a field goal pop up with 20odd seconds left and when I checked back it had disappeared.

[Browning]

What happened at the end of the Broncos, Colts game?

I saw a field goal pop up with 20odd seconds left and when I checked back it had disappeared.

The Broncos Defense got done with a penalty for something, and it gave the Colts a new set of downs, so they kneeled it out.

[elth]

I don't understand why you're not playing Trent Richardson... :checkit:

That trade alone should have been enough to get Grigson fired.

[The Bruce]

The end of that Colts/Broncos game was a bloody shambles from Denver's defence, what a bunch of colossal cunts.

Also lol at Peyton being 3yds short of getting the record in the Lucas Oil stadium.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

I watched Mean Joe Greene's A Football Life yesterday and that is, so far, by far my favourite.

[Gray Fox]

Dion Lewis now out for the season with an ACL tear. So so many of them in sports this year.

[Browning]

Anyone going to watch the game tonight? I have major Fantasy implications riding on it... so I'm tempted to stay up for the first time all year.

[Gray Fox]

I've got fantasy points riding on it so I'll be watching. I need the win so I can go into work tomorrow afternoon and be horrifically smug.

[Gray Fox]

Big Ben is out for 'weeks' with a foot sprain. Probably 2-3 games out.

[Dan]

And now Luck's out 2-6 weeks.. (http://www.nfl.com/news/story/0ap3000000577340/article/andrew-luck-out-26-weeks-with-lacerated-kidney)

Last team standing wins the SuperBowl this season.

[Gray Fox]

Good job my trade for him didn't go through!

[elth]

And now Luck's out 2-6 weeks.. (http://www.nfl.com/news/story/0ap3000000577340/article/andrew-luck-out-26-weeks-with-lacerated-kidney)

Last team standing wins the SuperBowl this season.

"lacerated kidney"

:sick:

[niko_cee]

He was taking some pretty big risks with those runs he kept going on. Was it the one where that massive lineman nailed him in the lower back on his way down that did this?

Article seems to think so.

http://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/american-football/34784628

What the fuck is wrong with that country? Shouldn't police dogs be trained not to go mental for little to no reason, or do they just groom them to attack blacks from birth over there?

[Giggles]

The linebacker could be charged with taunting a police K-9, a third degree felony in Pennsylvania.

There's enough wrong in that before you even get to how big an idiot he must be too.

[Giggles]

http://www.balls.ie/american-sports/arkansas-fourth-down/315185

Missed this at the weekend. Lucky as fuck.

[Dan]

Speaking of news that slipped by, Wes Welker has been picked up by the Rams. (http://www.nfl.com/videos/nfl-network-around-the-nfl/0ap3000000576780/Rapoport-Rams-sign-Wes-Welker) It'll be awesome until he takes one hit & is out for the season.

Also, Starks is now the lead back in Green Bay.

[Giggles]

About time Lacy got his big ass benched.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Fearsome Foursome is up there too, I could probably watch interviews with Deacon Jones and Rosey Grier all day long.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

IK Enemkpali aka the man who punched Geno in the mouth being a captain for this game :eyemouth:

[Dan]

Well, that was a game where both defences won. Shocking, I know.

Bills were good for the first half, and the RB's both played well throughout, but they went absolutely nowehere in the second half & almost threw the game on the bodged punt. Tyrod didn't have a particularly good game, and struggled to get to grips with the Jets defence, especially when they were blitzing him. Sammy Watkins looked okay for someone on Revis Island - the drop was a bad one, but he beat Revis all ends up off the line a couple of times for a few short receptions and looks like a great guy for Tyrod to bomb it deep at.

Jets, on the other hand, had a QB who played well, but was let down by his recievers dropping passes & a few odd play calls late in the game. Ivory looked decent outside of the fumble, but everyone else was average at best, and they would've been very lucky to have pinched the game at the death. Also, Brandon Marshall is rubbish.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

He should have had a huge catch but the nonce foolishly jumped way too early with, IIRC, the first pass of the game.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Marcus Allen A Football Life was great if only because he shat all over Al Davis and the Raiders after Al Davis attempted to bury his career.

What a massive cunt Al Davis was.

[Dan]

He should have had a huge catch but the nonce foolishly jumped way too early with, IIRC, the first pass of the game.

Yeah, that & the drop are plays you really need to make if Revis is going to be following you all game. If he makes those he has 5 catches from 7 targets for something like 70 yards & people are probably sayng he gave Revis trouble. There's top level potential there for sure - the little move on Revis to make that catch at the end of the game was delightful.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

First play and 'Johnny Football' fumbles it :eyemouth:

[Gray Fox]

Did I just hear Landry Jones is out for the game?

[Foe]

The Dolphins look inept here. The Eagles trundling it up the field and never looking in doubt.

Tanehill took a huge hit for that safety too. Stinger.

[The Bruce]

Dolphins win before we lose to the Patriots would be nice.

Noone cares about the Cowboys.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Our last 3 possessions:

Joe Flacco pick
Joe Flacco pick
Joe Flacco fumble.

:face:

[The Bruce]

Worth every penny!

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Surprised that it's taken this long for Sam Bradford to get injured.

[Giggles]

The Packers :face:

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Winston :D

Such a shame that it means the Cowboys win though.

Edit: lol at that hold.

[The Bruce]

All the shit teams I don't like losing thus far :thbup:

Squeaked loss to the Patriot juggernaut before we beat them in the Super Bowl again :nodd:

[Giggles]

McCarthy needs to go back to play calling now. Whatever about the last two weeks, that's a fucking shambles.

[Gray Fox]

That missed FG to hand the Lions the win @ Packers was lol, but it was my fantasy kicker. Seems to be 3 teams miles better than everyone else this year.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

It's a Peyton Manning Pick Party.

[Browning]

Manning needs to retire on the spot. He's a fucking shambles.

[Ian]

He really does.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Amendola getting tripped at the 7 yard line by his teammate :D

[niko_cee]

Aye. What a div.

Shame they scored in the end though.

[Dan]

Fire all the Saints secondary & defensive coaching staff & hire literally anyone else. They're a disgrace.

Watching the condensed game tomorrow is going to be joyous.

EDIT: As least Peyton & the Packers have done their best to outshit us.

[Dan]

Osweiler's in :D

[Dan]

So that Giants TD is getting called back, right? This catch rule is a shambles.

EDIT: Yep, good call.

That dropped pick is brutal. And it cost them the game.

[The Bruce]

Fucking gutted. How you can have four refs on field confer and call that a TD then have it overturned by review shows how little these refs know the rules of the game at the minute. Badly needs sorting out.

Lol at Peyton though, the useless old cunt. Him telling the story of how he broke the all time NFL passing yards for a QB while throwing unlimited interceptions and getting benched is brilliant.

[wullie]

The season has been 'over' every defeat so far, but it does feel a bit more like it now.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

http://www.nfl.com/news/story/0ap3000000581252/article/peyton-manning-battling-plantar-fasciitis

Peyton is suffering with 'plantar fasciitis' and Brock Osweiler will start next week.

[Giggles]

http://www.nfl.com/news/story/0ap3000000581252/article/peyton-manning-battling-plantar-fasciitis

Peyton is suffering with 'plantar fasciitis' and Brock Osweiler will start next week.

Could have seen the last of him, though it depends on how much faith there is in Osweiler as they're still contenders.

[Browning]

Could have seen the last of him, though it depends on how much faith there is in Osweiler as they're still contenders.

They should just sign Sir Timothy and be done with it.

[Gray Fox]

Could have seen the last of him, though it depends on how much faith there is in Osweiler as they're still contenders.

I hear Kaepernick is available.

[Giggles]

Could do worse. He needs a chsnge of scenery.

[Browning]

Foles has been benched too, and Bradford is out at least 2 weeks. QBs are dropping like flies.

[Dan]

Who's even going to play for the Rams?

EDIT: Oh, Case Keenum :D

[Gray Fox]

So, Mark Sanchez again. Please don't be as bad as last time.

[Ian]

Jesus, even the thought of signing Kaepernick makes me feel unwell.

Manning's arm was clearly weaker anyway but the way it's suddenly gone off a fucking cliff is alarming. At least he had the decency to look embarrassed at that cringeworthy stop-the-game-for-him bullshit Denver pulled. Play Osweiler as long as is required to get Manning healthy.

If Osweiler is great, great! Keep him in. If he's not then it barely matters, if Manning gets rushed back his minimal chance of some sort of last hurrah becomes non-existent anyway and it makes no difference.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

http://www.nfl.com/news/story/0ap3000000581284/article/saints-fire-rob-ryan-following-defensive-meltdown

The most shocking news of the entire season, Rob 'The Defensive Saviour' Ryan has been sacked.

Dan will be crushed.

[Giggles]

How did that chancer even get more work at all?

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Because of Buddy and Rex.

He lived off his surname damn well.

[Dan]

Well thank fuck for that :fun: Maybe Brandon Browner will shine in a new system...

The Bengals looked a shambles last night too - Eifert dropped a billion passes, Dalton was off the mark a lot & everyone else did nothing except Gio Bernard, who was excellent. The Texans defence seems to be getting back to somewhere like the level of performance it was meant to be at all season too - Whitney Mercilus looks like a bit of a beast, and JJ destroyed everyone all the time as usual.

Things are getting interesting :drool:

[The Bruce]

Cruz out for the season but Nicks is back :cool:

Benching Foles is hatstand stuff in St Louis, you can't be doing that this early in his time there. Peyton however needs to be Old Yellar'ed, it's almost a shame.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

http://www.nfl.com/news/story/0ap3000000582286/article/seahawks-cut-super-bowl-star-chris-matthews

With Breshad Perriman now on IR, I hope the Ravens make a play for him.

Can't be much worse than our WR's bar Aiken.

[elth]

Peyton getting a second ring as the backup QB would be immense.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Browns are going to start Johnny Manziel for the rest of the season so it will be fun to see the media's new QB darling fail hard.

Aldon Smith has been given a one year suspension.

[Gray Fox]

They must be trying to get a good draft pick. Clever bastards.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

Zuttah out for the rest of the season.

Had we been on course for the playoffs that would have been devastating, as it is John Urshel will get some game time and we'll probably get a better draft pick.

Suck for whoever is the best player in the upcoming draft :drool:

[Browning]

Kaepernick is done for the season.

[Dan]

The Eagles or Rams will probably go in for him. They both love shit quarterbacks that can't complete a full season.

Either that or the Chiefs should pick him up to replace Alex Smith. Again.

[Gray Fox]

Anything but Kaepernick, please.

[Browning]

I think it's clear that rushing QBs was a fad that completely failed. No idea why so many teams started jacking off to them so much.

[Giggles]

There's always a fad of some description.

[The Bruce]

RIP Read Option quarterbacks along with the Wildcat :chief: