Pigeon Killer

[Manc]

After discovering a nest with eggs on my balcony accompanied by an interchanging mother & father, I've finally offed the fuckers. It's not a desicion I'm proud of and as the eggs splattered I questioned my morality, but it's unhygienic and fuck the early morning chirping.

The father is currently pacing up and down the balcony looking highly confused. I'll give him time to grieve.

[Pepe]

Couldn't you just move them elsewhere?

[Magic]

This is the worst thing I've ever read on here.

[Sir Andy Mahowry]

You monster.

[Vim]

Why?

[Lewis]

You cunt.

[GS]

Proper shithouse behaviour.

[Ian]

For fuck's sake, man, what's wrong with you?

[Manc]

Had to be done.

[randomlegend]

http://img06.deviantart.net/c9bf/i/2009/210/9/f/sad_pigeon__by_john2lemon.jpg

[John]

I'm seriously considering banning you. This isn't for comedy effect, your jacket is on a very shoogly peg.

[Boydy]

I hope the pigeons round up all their mates and start attacking you.

[Disco]

They're just pigeons, tipping the eggs out is a teensy bit 'serial killer in training' but it's no different from shooting them when they're older.

[Boydy]

I suppose it's just a pigeon abortion, really.

[Magic]

They're just pigeons, tipping the eggs out is a teensy bit 'serial killer in training' but it's no different from shooting them when they're older.

Do you even realise how extreme the porn I've had to watch to make myself feel more upbeat was?

[Magic]

I suppose it's just a pigeon abortion, really.

Oh shit now we're talking. :drool:

[Disco]

Can you eat pigeon eggs? You probably can, but you probably shouldn't.

[Magic]

Manc did you use one of the aborted pigeon foetuses as lube to masturbate yourself as you killed the others?

[bruhnaldo]

wow.

[Disco]

Do you even realise how extreme the porn I've had to watch to make myself feel more upbeat was?

Was it as bleak as the prospect of another 20 years of married life? :henn0rz:

[Magic]

Was it as bleak as the prospect of another 20 years of married life? :henn0rz:

Presumably the 0 was a typo?

[Giggles]

Here's hoping for pigeon sleep paralysis/night terrors for the next 5-10 years.

[Shindig]

You probably should've just shifted the nest, really. Those pigeons could've grown up to be the cure for cancer.

[Disco]

Or Dove Hitler.

[Disco]

Of course I googled 'Dove Hitler' and look what was the third result.


http://i.imgur.com/zsgEtsQ.png

[Shindig]

http://vignette3.wikia.nocookie.net/uncyclopedia/images/e/e8/Nazi_Pigeon.jpg/revision/latest?cb=20070111043929

[Pen]

This faux outrage was nicely coordinated and I enjoyed the nazi pigeon :D

[Kikó]

Thanks for the review pen. Look forward to the next.

[Pen]

As always, I came in after everything had already ended. A review was needed to round everything up.

[Disco]

It was very much of its time, that half an hour made all the difference.

[Kikó]

They will probably get the pigeon detectives in to investigate.

[Spoonsky]

I've never seen TTH take such an unequivocal moral stand as in the first 10 replies or so.

It's not pigeon abortion because the adult pigeons didn't have a choice. It's pigeon murder.

[Kikó]

How do you know that's not what the pigeon parents wanted? Maybe it was a pigeon born with downs syndrome and they couldn't look after it?

[Pepe]

Are you saying whatever was inside that egg could already be considered a pigeon?

[Giggles]

Now look what you've fucking done Manc.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Good to see Disco providing the country bumpkin voice of reason, i.e. not having a romanticised view of wildlife due to never coming into contact with it. Most animals are shit, but pigeons are really terrible. Kill kill kill.

[Spoonsky]

I don't think most people have romanticized views of pigeons.

[Magic]

I've never seen TTH take such an unequivocal moral stand as in the first 10 replies or so.

It's not pigeon abortion because the adult pigeons didn't have a choice. It's pigeon murder.

Sorry isn't that what abortion is?

:eyemouth:

[John]

Getting up early obviously doesn't agree with you, Magic. That post and your deleted one in another thread are just complete arse.

Pigeons are shit, but whenever server man on the old board gets off his fucking arse and sorts it out I think Duck Tales will put that Floyd post in context.