The Cricket Thread

[Jimmy Floyd]

I agree with Jimmy, with the sole exception that I'm willing to put scores runs over faces balls in some situations.

This is not one of those situations.

I'd want a couple in my team, probably batting at 5-7 in the expectation that the correctly selected top 4 might occasionally do their jobs and time can then be sold. They have to be flexible though. In a Test match, if I'm going to have a one-dimensional batsman I'd rather have the Hameed kind.

If you get a Warner or a Sehwag come along who can go at a good rate AND not throw their wicket away, then you're quids in but there are unbelievably few of those players about compared to the number that selectors seem to want there to be.

[ItalAussie]

I'd want a couple in my team, probably batting at 5-7 in the expectation that the correctly selected top 4 might occasionally do their jobs and time can then be sold. They have to be flexible though. In a Test match, if I'm going to have a one-dimensional batsman I'd rather have the Hameed kind.

If you get a Warner or a Sehwag come along who can go at a good rate AND not throw their wicket away, then you're quids in but there are unbelievably few of those players about compared to the number that selectors seem to want there to be.

As you know, I like a balance between one attacking opener and one safe crease-occupier, because I like the idea of a player taking the game away on the first day. Maybe this is because I grew up watching Michael Slater and Matthew Hayden do precisely that.

It's still a test - you can't be throwing your wicket away. But you generally knew that Mark Taylor or Justin Langer would still be there a couple of sessions into the match, so it wasn't panic stations when it didn't work.

[ItalAussie]

We have a huge problem with collapsing though

Yeah, I like that Renshaw valued his wicket. We have Warner to accelerate things, so we needed the safest, occupiest opener we can find.

[niko_cee]

Paine hasn't even been keeping for his state side?



They're just trying to lull us into a false sense of security. I had a dream last night I picked up watching the first day somewhere in the final session and we were 214-1 when I started to watch. 222-5 shortly thereafter. Vivid shit.

[Jimmy Floyd]

As you know, I like a balance between one attacking opener and one safe crease-occupier, because I like the idea of a player taking the game away on the first day. Maybe this is because I grew up watching Michael Slater and Matthew Hayden do precisely that.

It's still a test - you can't be throwing your wicket away. But you generally knew that Mark Taylor or Justin Langer would still be there a couple of sessions into the match, so it wasn't panic stations when it didn't work.

Fun fact - Langer scored his Test runs at an identical rate to Tendulkar and Sangakkara. They just batted on average for 16 and 22 balls longer respectively.

Another fun fact - Hayden actually survived on average a ball longer than Langer.

[niko_cee]

I hadn't really appreciated how inexperienced this Australian side really is. I suppose it is similar to us, although probably moreso.

Test debutant opening, not really a whole lot of experience in the middle order. Heavy reliance on Warner, Smith and the fast bowlers. I reckon we come out on top in a combined XI. Shame about no Stokes.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Woakes's Ashes, this.

[niko_cee]

What is our likely first test team? Cook, Stoneman, Vince, Root, Malan, Bairstow, Moeen, Overton, Woakes, Broad, Anderson? Is it a straight choice between Overton and Ballance for the last spot? Actually I see Gaz Ballaz hasn't been playing much, he'll still worm his way in somehow.

[Dave.]

I think we'll go with the team above. What's the likely Australian line up?

[niko_cee]

Warner, Bancroft, Khawajabear, Smith, Handscomb, Marsh, Paine, Starc, Lyon, Hazelwood, Cummins would be my guess, seeing as there are only 13 to pick from.

Oh yeah, I forgot about Ball for us, who has a chance of being fit apparently. I guess he's switches with Overton.

[Ian]

Should I be taking any heart from Stoneman's form so far? I feel like this is building up to a series of ducks.

[Jimmy Floyd]

It'll be as niko said but with Woakes batting 8 and Overton/Ball/whoever 9.

Aussie team also as niko says and then Chadd Sayers will no doubt come in for Adelaide for whichever one of the quicks gets crocked.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Going back to selectors being idiots, I've just been reminded that a year ago the England mob thought Ben Duckett was the solution at opener. Genuinely mental and without rational faculties.

[Jimmy Floyd]

http://www.theaustralian.com.au/spor...fcf25564021d80

Cricinfo also reported Howard as favouring “the use of deep statistical analysis and computer-based modelling to judge the suitability of players’’.

Oh Christ, of course, this is how they've done it. Players who look younger than they are and have below average arse hair coverage score 4.2 runs more in high wind against seamers whose surnames start with the letters A-D, so we'd better pick Tim Paine.

HAVE THEY SCORED ANY RUNS.

[ItalAussie]

Another fun fact - Hayden actually survived on average a ball longer than Langer.

That's because when Hayden teed off, he was basically undismissable. There were a couple of seasons - 2004/2005 - where Langer bailed us out a dozen or so times by digging in.

But yeah, Langer wasn't slow. He did, however, value his wicket and not take many risks.

[ItalAussie]

http://www.theaustralian.com.au/spor...fcf25564021d80


Oh Christ, of course, this is how they've done it. Players who look younger than they are and have below average arse hair coverage score 4.2 runs more in high wind against seamers whose surnames start with the letters A-D, so we'd better pick Tim Paine.

HAVE THEY SCORED ANY RUNS.

Sport analytics.

Baseball? Fine, large sample size and all that. Basketball? It helped them figure out that 3-pointers from the corner were the way to go.

Anything else? Piss off. The best bit is how desperate they are to make it work for football, and how badly even the "best" techniques do at actually predicting outcomes. If you ever want to laugh sadly, look up "expected goals" and its related statistics.

[niko_cee]

I wonder what the excepted wickets figure for the Townsville pitch today was.

Just need to survive Brisbane and get under the lights at Adeleide where, it would seem (seam?), Our Jimeth is going to run riot.

[Ian]

Anything else? Piss off. The best bit is how desperate they are to make it work for football, and how badly even the "best" techniques do at actually predicting outcomes. If you ever want to laugh sadly, look up "expected goals" and its related statistics.

I even have my gripes about assists before you even get to the likes of that, which is clearly invented by a statistician trying to justify his job at a club or broadcaster or whatever.

[Jimmy Floyd]

If the season lasted 30,000 games with the same players playing every game, it might have some predictive value.

[Jimmy Floyd]

http://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/cricket/42056362

Lyon must have had the onerous task of borrowing Warner's brain for the day. Good luck getting Root dropped with your gentle offies, cobber.

[niko_cee]

It's fairly embarrassing stuff. One can only hope it comes back to bite them in he arse after an unexpectedly recalled Chris Tremlett reduces them to ruins again.

Even more amusing is Sky's intended output on their cricket channel, which appears to be entirely womens cricket. I assume they are applying the same 'not on Sky so it isn't happening' rationale they do for things like the World Cup.

[Jimmy Floyd]

I guess if you don't have the rights, what can you show.

[niko_cee]

Are any highlights available on terrestrial or is it all BT?

[Jimmy Floyd]

All BT. I therefore won't watch a single ball apart from whatever gets spewed onto Twitter. Will have TMS all the way.

[niko_cee]

Seems you can get some sort of highlights package off their website for free, but I'm not sure what that will entail.

[Jimmy Floyd]

It will entail marvellous banter from Vaughany and KP, and I believe the Channel 9 picture feed (but without their equally distressingly bad commentary team).

Some people I know are paying whatever to have BT for the three months, but I personally believe away Ashes tours are best experienced in a state of near sleep paralysis with the radio on drifting in and out of sleep at 4am. Which is both something you can only do if you're single, and a good pointer for why I'm single.

[Queenslander]

Lyon mate stay in your lane you mong.

[niko_cee]

Yeah, I fear 6 minutes of triple-distilled ultrabantz, and would agree as regards the away Ashes experience.

There's really no way to properly follow it and function as an adult at the same time.

[Jimmy Floyd]

If some way can be found of getting Warne, KP and 'Tubs' or 'Heals' into a booth bantering about golf handicaps, that might be a good time to test any new chemical warfare technology that the Australian government may be harbouring.

[Max Power]

Ponting will be the saving grace on BT.

Unsure as to how much I will see despite having BT. Work and other commitments... will never be like 10/11 again when I was depressed and unemployed. The glory days.

[Jimmy Floyd]

My depressed, unemployed glory days were the India tour where we did them 2-1 after losing the first Test where Pujara scored a million. What utter scenes.

[Byron]

I'm one of these wankers that only turns up for the tournaments but I can tell you now that struggling through work with TMS live feed is the best way to experience cricket, mainly because it's relaxed and I can take in precisely as much as I want to.

[Danny]

Lyon in for a bit of deflection after that shambles of a selection. Nice spin, Gaaaary

[Jimmy Floyd]

http://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/cricket/42078910

The Cheese has been smoking some good shit.

[Ian]

Is it midnight that this actually starts?

I'm tempted to get an early night and set my alarm for 5, say, so I can see some but then I'll regret it when I get up and we're 103-7.

I suppose my consumption of this will mostly be whatever highlights I can find online if Sky aren't getting any of it.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Yep, 00:00 first ball bowled, if they've managed to drone through the digeridoos and thanking the spirit of our ancestors by then.

Australia has the absolute best national song in the world and yet the worst national anthem, silly country.

[Ian]

How much you gonna watching, Jim? If I sit up even for an hour I'll feel like death tomorrow. Although I'm going into backshifts again from December the 11th so might actually get to see so-..... oh yeah, BT. Fuck.

Listen to some live, then.

[igor_balis]

I'm watching (assuming I find an alright stream) until lunch, and beyond if we're smashing it. Gosh I'm so PUMPED!

[Max Power]

Woke up at 6 today and need to be up about 7 tomorrow. Don’t know whether to stay up and watch the first hour or two or try and wake up at like 4:30 to watch the last session.

[igor_balis]

Knowing my luck, i'll grumpily fall asleep at lunch with Aussies 89-0 and wake up to England a few without loss after Broad had one of his mental spells.

[Jimmy Floyd]

How much you gonna watching, Jim? If I sit up even for an hour I'll feel like death tomorrow. Although I'm going into backshifts again from December the 11th so might actually get to see so-..... oh yeah, BT. Fuck.

Listen to some live, then.

I'll be watching nothing but listening to loads, especially if we aren't 100/9 at lunch and Glenn McGrath isn't purring on the radio.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Woke up at 6 today and need to be up about 7 tomorrow. Don’t know whether to stay up and watch the first hour or two or try and wake up at like 4:30 to watch the last session.

These ones are OK because at least you've got an hour or so at either end of the day.

Perth, though, is brutal in every respect.

[McAvennie]

I chatted to a guy today who is flying out for the Perth test.
He's going all the way to Australia to watch cricket. I genuinely don't understand. He on the other hand was very excited about the idea

[Max Power]

Jesus BT have even roped Boycott in. Their team looks trash.

Weirdly fancy England. I’m staying up for a bit. What am I doing?

[Jimmy Floyd]

Geoffrey has been a great pundit but he's rocking a bit nowadays, he's only ever one awkward silence away from calling someone 'coloured'.

I fancy England to no extent whatsoever. We're getting thrashed. Batting just not good enough.

[Max Power]

One of Australia’s quicks is going to break down. Probably Cummins. Bat first and rack em up. Maybe.

[Jimmy Floyd]

Stick them in Joe!

[Shindig]

I'm not unemployed so we're not winning.

[Max Power]

I’m flagging already. Will probably only make it until Joe Root strolls out at 20-2.

[igor_balis]

Work matey gave me his dad's bt sport log in, what an absolute bloody lad.