Thank fuck Sasha didn't win this.
Thank fuck Sasha didn't win this.
They got the mix of current & former talent right in this - the Rumble is meant to have nods to the past, whether that's former champions or cult gimmicks.
The male Rumble seems to have just turned into a load of midcarders who have nothing else to do, plus five guys who might actually win & whatever comedy guys they have on the books. Only having The Hurricane was pretty rubbish this year, but I feel like there's probably been a few like that over the last five years.
I bet the Bellas are well happy to be back in the ring to take kicks from Asuka.
It was always going to be Girlberg who won it, but if Nikki pulled it off I'd laugh all night.
The seethe when Nikki wins this
Japan is the real winner tonight.
What the actual fuck
Oh, here we go...
Are we really going to build Asuka up for all this time just to feed her to Ronda fucking Rousey? That would be such a WWE thing to do.
Well, all things considered that was about what I expected. The lady Rumble was the best match of the night, and an example of the formula the man Rumble needs to go back to, but everything else was standard WWE fare, complete with iffy booking decisions & underwhelming finishes.
Heath Slater donning Sheamus was the mark out moment of the night for me though,
Good show overall, the tag matches being a bit too filler but everything else was fine. The running order was odd but made sense with the finish, I'd like to see the KFC Rumble go last as is tradition. If they've got Rey Mysterio in the same week they've let Enzo Amore go 205 Live just improved 400000000%.
Is John Cena's only move in a rumble to fail to do his finisher? He must have had people on his shoulders slide off about 35 times in that match.
This is the thing I was on about
Up there with the Steiner clip in TNA.
If they get a major pay per view before us... Then again, they would go overboard on the Japan theme and it would turn out racist, so it might be alright.Originally Posted by SvN
I bet Piper's jacket had all sorts of shit in the pockets. Mad cunt.
There would of been a riot in Philly if Boo Reigns would of won the Men's Rumble if I'm honest.
Nakamura-Styles will probably be a bit shit considering their Japanese match was pretty good apparently (I've never seen it).
WWE title match had a less bullshit ending than I expected so that was a bonus. Smackdown tag match had a bizarre ending, I'm not sure what they were going for at all with the Raw one and the Universal title match was, surprise, surprise, a load of absolute shit. Lesnar's wrestled about five meaningful matches in this title reign and the only one that was worth a damn was the one where AJ dragged a good match out of him.
I did like both Rumbles though. neither are classics but they're better than any Rumble match we've had in..... however long. At least a few years. We're still going to have a Lesnar match as the Mania main event but it'll be worth it if we're rid of him for a bit.
Some of the comments in here were a bit peculiar, reading through it. In terms of moaning about things that have scarcely changed in WWE for, at a rough estimate, about a quarter of a century.
I couldn't give the tiniest of solitary shits about Rousey.
Never mind all that though, the BIG news is that Booker is getting replaced by Coach.
Thank fuck for that.
Might have to give an episode of RAW a go, I can't stand Booker on Comms I feel he's a bit bland.
Watching it now.
Usos match
The work for the first pinfall was great.
I love how Jimmy and Jey Uso work together.
The Usos are good but you loved / are loving that match?
Rhyno looks like he eats a couple of cakes every single hour.
He's fucking massive.
Edit: What a stupid fucking decision to have Corbin take everyone out. A nice 2 minute break in the Royal Rumble is always fucking needed.
And now Elias walking in with his guitar? This might be the worst start ever.
lol at Sheamus, from Rumble winner to Santino Marella.
Kofi
The fucking Hurricane?
The 'You both suck' chant
The more I see of Reigns, the more I understand why people hate him. Has he ever done a move that wasn't a superman punch, spear or samoan drop?
Wanted Balor or Nakamura to win so I'm happy with the result.
Edit: What a shit second tag that was, what was the fucking point? Jason Jordan is shit.
I fucking love Kairi Sane, this Rumble is great if only because it introduced her to me.
Stephanie should have slapped Corey, so strange having him basically being Jerry Lawler during the Attitude Era. Surprised he was talking about puppies.
Kelly Kelly
Becky Lynch really should have been final 4.
Nia Jax might have bigger thighs than fucking Viscera.
That Naomi save was seen a fucking mile off. Copying Kofi with the chair, ugh.
They should have done more with Asuka and Ember Moon. The short face off they had was really good.
I'm genuinely shocked at the praise the men's rumble is getting. "Best rumble of the decade...." "4 and a half stars!".... etc etc
It was an improvement on the last couple of years, but it was still pretty shit. The winner we all wanted actually winning doesn't make it an epic match. The Women were much better.
I didn't know it was getting praise as high (outside one WhatCulture headline that described it as the best ever, which I didn't even bother reading) as that and that reeks of overexcitement but I would disagree that it was "shit", but then I neither know what the last WWE thing was that you didn't think was shit or why you even bother. But I'm sure we've had this conversation before.
I thought the two last night were at about the same level, albeit they failed and succeeded in different ways. And not all of the failings of the womens one were the fault of anybody in the match.
A Rumble should have a good number of surprises and nostalgia. 8 seconds of The Hurricane and a fairly brief cameo from Rey Mysterio just doesn't cut it for me. Also it's becoming very formulaic. Whenever anyone survives any kind of scare (and I don't just mean Kofi.... though he is one example) they tend to be thrown out with no effort mere seconds later making the whole thing pointless, and you always have the "CAN ANYBODY STOP PERSON X!" moment before the big guy/girl comes in. As I said, it was an improvement, but it certainly wasn't worth writing home about. If the previous 2-3 hadn't been so bad, I can't imagine people would care for it.
The Women probably had too many surprises if anything, but that's because the roster is so thin. They were enjoyable though and other than Michelle they didn't really take away from the current talent. I would have preferred someone with half a chance of winning (e.g. Sasha or Bayley) in the final 2 rather than Nikki Bella.... but that's a fairly minor gripe when the men's match came down to the only 3 men I said had a prayer of winning it right from the start (two of which would have been total bullshit). I don't know, it was enjoyable enough, but I don't think it was particularly good. That I woke up half way through and the biggest thing I missed was Heath Slater sums it up.
I’ve watched NXT and The Rumble over the last two days managing to avoid spoilers by keeping off Twitter during the day, and I really enjoyed NXT but the Rumble felt all over the place.
Not sure if it was the order of the matches, or something else, but the Men’s Rumble just felt unimportant.
I did enjoy Cena, Orton and Mysterio clubbing together against Nakamura, Balor and I think Reigns, as well as Slater’s bit and the return of Mysterio (does this mean Hunico isn’t going to be the next big Mexican star?)
Considering there was only 18 or so men announced before the match, there wasn’t enough random entries for nostalgia, which is always one of the key factors for me.
I also noticed Braun Strowman accidentally knee-ing Brock Lesnar in the head and Lesnar’s legit punch back - good going on Strowman for hanging in there.
Wonder where Ronda Rousey is headed, then? Bit odd of her not laying someone out if her opponent was in the ring with her last night, is all.
lol I've just seen that knee/punch bit. Legend.
What a Rumble, they were both great. They had their iffy spots, neither Heath Slater or Goldust won for a start, and there was definitely a point at which they brought Cena out and it became clear that THIS IS THE END OF THE FUN PART PLEASE PAY ATTENTION. Oh, and fuck off with your pancakes. The womens one had some dodgy cameos most of whom looked really out of place, plus I refuse to believe that this is the natural reaction of any credible human being to the arrival of Michelle McCool
Still, it was more than made up for by the superb trolling of the crowd in the mens Rumble. Giving them Nakamura / Balor then teasing Reigns or Cena, top work Vinny. Pleased to hear the reactions for Almas and Adam Cole and properly popped for Rey and, biggest surprise of the night, Vicki fucking Guerrero
Other things of note:
Asuka is better than almost everyone else in the company and she should teach every other woman on the roster how to kick people properly
Rusev is great and more over than pretty much anyone else
Baron Corbin is irredeemably bad
The three way match was pretty turd, totally pointless too because we all knew exactly who was going to win and how. The end was greeted with what seemed like complete silence and indifference from the crowd, they appeared not to be watching and who can blame them. I'm not sure how I feel about Straw Boatman and his weird trousers. On the one hand he's a giant red lump of a man who is great at being angry and throwing stuff about and I can absolutely get behind that. But the man should never be allowed to speak, in the video package I heard him actually say I am the only alpha monster! I mean good grief that's bad. Just be an angry fight-man who fights a man then wants to fight another man, it's not rocket science lads.
Doesn't deserve an edit, it deserves a new fucking post.
Vickie fucking Guerrero? What in the actual fuck were they thinking?
A voice that could awaken the dead.
"EXCYAUUUSE MEH!" Lights out <BONG>
I'm giving you gold, Vince.
The second pinfall was shit (they seem to have a massive hard on for surprise roll up pins lately) but yeah, I liked it a lot. I haven't seen much of The Usos though (second or third match I think) so they're new to me.
Also glad that they gave Asuka the win and didn't have Rousey in it (they were probably scared she'd fuck it up but Sasha and her kicks did a good job of that). she's going to be so fucking bad though.
Enjoyed the female rumble more as I prefer more 'shock' entrants, especially when the male one is filled with jobbers and Baron fucking Corbin. The start of the men's Rumble was also really strange. Corbin going mental, then Elias being a shit Rock (Sacremento wont be topped) leaving us without any action for 5 minutes.
I did hate that the women's rumble had so many people rolling out, Sasha spent most of it outside and a few times I had a 'Did X get eliminated/Wasn't she eliminated' moment. Carmella and Nia 'Viscera Thighs' Jax did that a couple of times.
I was hoping for Awesome Kong
Edit- Actually, the first part of that wasn't how I remembered it, so scratch that.
She is, however, probably busy making GLOW.
Edit again- Turns out she lost a baby immediately before the first Rumble she was in (not after, as I thought) so yea.... not sure she'd be keen on another one, but I guess she could do it.
I do think it's a bit of a shame, just for the first one, they couldn't make up some bullshit stipulation that allowed Charlotte and Bliss into the Rumble because it must be a bit gutting for them to not be in. I know it would have been predictable that they wouldn't win, but still.
Yeah, it was clear that they were gutted on the pre-show.
I guess being ring side being able to hear the lecherous Corey Graves and dull as fuck Stephanie McMahon was good enough.
They could have done it and said the winner got to challenge for the other title (which would have had to have been some odd match where one belt was on the line, and not the other belt.... and would made the fact the champion was retaining too obvious, so they couldn't really have gone with it) which probably would have been no worse than Vickie Guerrero and having to hear that shitty Riot music 3 times.
Yeah, I thought either that or they get to choose their own challenger or something along those lines. You could then at least have teased more of the Alexa / Nia thing and then had the former try to screw the latter. It would have probably not benefitted the match I just felt a bit sorry for the two of them.
Am I the only one who can't stand Sasha Banks?
She stinks.
She's hot (I love crazy coloured hair for some reason) but she's awful.
The kicking thing in the rumble was brilliant.
The anger in Brock's face
Actually, there was Braun voluntarily going into the table:
[gyfcat]simpleunlawfulanura[/gyfcat]
Oh and here's the amazingly shit head scissors by Kelly Kelly:
[gyfcat]dapperspottedaltiplanochinchillamouse[/gyfcat]
There's this from the pre-show as the commentators were wondering if Roode 'got all of it':
[gyfcat]inferioractiveborer[/gyfcat]
I hope after her stuff in the Rumble she turns heel. Her heel work in NXT was really good. She made that little girl who’s into Bailey cry then stood and mocked her for it
Naomi doing the Kofi Kingston routine only to then get immediately thrown out was ace. Current plans for Wrestlemania are a fatal fourway of her, Kofi, John Morrison and Shelton Benjamin where the first person to touch the floor dies.
She's had some good matches but I struggle to like her and then there's her propensity to injure people.
She's going bald faster than Shawn Michaels mate.
When the Sasha/Bayley stuff happened I pointed out that Bayley was carrying her and was laughed at by people on here. Glad she's proven me right. Bayley hasn't exactly set the world on fire, but Sasha is fucking shit.
I don't care much about her one way or the other but I think Banks is decent. She's not convincing as a face though. And she's probably one where she's not ever elevating anybody crap but she's capable of holding her own against good people, and there are way more highly-respected people than her guilty of the same.
Some decent matches on Raw. I enjoyed Asuka / Banks, Reigns / Miz and Cena / Balor were all solid. And Cena had a match that didn't involve 27 finishers! I find it interesting that the Coup de Grace is still quite well protected even though Balor himself isn't (that's a comment on his overall booking, not him losing to Cena.) A bit like the Sister Abigail and Bray. Although they do seem to like Balor a little bit more again just now.
Right on cue Sasha with a horrific looking suicide dive. Sure it was planned, but yea.... one of these days her career will end doing that.
Making Nakamura pick his opponent there and then and then saying Asuka doesn't have to because Bliss could lose is exactly the kind of sloppy shit they wouldn't have done back in the day. It's almost like they all knew Brock was going to retain and they'd have no champion until Mania....
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