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Thread: The ULTRAMEGA Summer 2017 Transfers and Rumours Thread [featuring THE MIGHTY BLADES]

  1. #1501
    Senior Member SincereTheRebel's Avatar
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    Benzema has been there for 8 seasons now. Last year, he had his lowest scoring season at real madrid since his first season. Sell him, bring in mbappe and move c.ronaldo into a central position.

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    Won the Old Board Lewis's Avatar
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    Karim Benzema looked pretty amazing when he scored at Old Trafford after just turning twenty (he was also monstering the French league), and has he ever been consistently world class since?

  3. #1503
    Senior Member SincereTheRebel's Avatar
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    His numbers from a statistically view are great. Although anyone playing in a real madrid team as a number 9 would be.

  4. #1504
    Senior Member Jimmy Floyd's Avatar
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    If they stuck me up top for 38 x 90 minutes in La Liga, I wonder how many I'd notch. Probably zero.

  5. #1505
    Senior Member niko_cee's Avatar
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    Only if thy spitefully never gave you a tap in, or you spent all your time chatting to Navas.

  6. #1506
    Senior Member John's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lewis View Post
    Karim Benzema looked pretty amazing when he scored at Old Trafford after just turning twenty (he was also monstering the French league), and has he ever been consistently world class since?
    I think that was the same year he scored a hat trick at Ibrox after we'd turned them over in France. 07/08. He absolutely dismantled us on his own.

  7. #1507
    Senior Member Lofty's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lewis View Post
    Why bother? They're loaning him back for a year anyway, and realistically who else can (or would) pay a similar amount (whilst also representing a progression, thereby ruling PSG out)? It's not as if he will have ten clubs in for him next summer, so wait eighteen months and see if he doesn't flatline.
    Is it not a bit weird to break the world transfer record by a country mile then immediately loan him out?

  8. #1508
    Senior Member Spoonsky's Avatar
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    City have made an official offer for Mbappe. Wherever he ends up will be annoying.

  9. #1509
    More successful than most Magic's Avatar
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    That bloody defence budget thing is doing my head in. It's EVERYWHERE.

  10. #1510
    Won the Old Board Lewis's Avatar
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    At least whoever told City that Madrid will take ages getting the money together is having a good laugh.

  11. #1511
    DEATH TO THE WEIRD Raoul Duke's Avatar
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    Madrid will have spent almost £200m on players who've played about 40 games between them in total, if you chuck in that Brazilian scamp too.

  12. #1512
    ram it up your shitpipe Giggles's Avatar
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    Has that Lacazette lad actually signed for Arsenal? Completely missed that.

  13. #1513
    Won the Old Board Lewis's Avatar
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    Ross Barkley wants to leave Everton (lol at all the 'typical slow decision' stuff), but who would bother? He's twenty-four in December. There was talk last week of United waiting until TRANSFER DEADLINE DAY and getting him for a fiver, but I hope they don't.

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    Like Eric Dier, I reckon Barkley is massively overrated.

  15. #1515
    Senior Member Jimmy Floyd's Avatar
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    I didn't know Dier held any opinion on the subject.

  16. #1516
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    He's not a big fan, apparently.

  17. #1517
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    Literally no one gives a fuck but Orlando City signed Dom Dwyer, a player who came to us on loan in 2013 when we were still in the 2nd division and broke a bunch of goalscoring records.

    Myself and a bunch of other psycho fans met him at the airport



    My fat ass is on the left side with the purple hat on

  18. #1518
    Senior Member Offshore Toon's Avatar
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    Get in the diet thread, mate.

  19. #1519
    ram it up your shitpipe Giggles's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Offshore Toon View Post
    Get in the diet thread, mate.
    I missed the bit where he said it was a problem.

  20. #1520
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    Exactly, I actively want to die so if shoving 300 McChickens down my throat a week will help expedite that process I'm all for it.

    In the meantime I'll just enjoy mediocre MLS football and all of you wonderful lads

  21. #1521
    Senior Member Spoonsky's Avatar
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    Fuck Dom Dwyer. British cunt pretending to be American.

  22. #1522
    Won the Old Board Lewis's Avatar
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    lol he's even from Cuckfield.

  23. #1523
    Senior Member Spikey M's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Spoonsky View Post
    Fuck Dom Dwyer. British cunt pretending to be American.
    Better than every American cunt pretending to be Italian/Irish tbh

  24. #1524
    Senior Member Adamski's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by bruhnaldo View Post
    Literally no one gives a fuck but Orlando City signed Dom Dwyer, a player who came to us on loan in 2013 when we were still in the 2nd division and broke a bunch of goalscoring records.

    Myself and a bunch of other psycho fans met him at the airport



    My fat ass is on the left side with the purple hat on
    Division 2

  25. #1525
    Bruuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuno Reg's Avatar
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    We've got Izzy Brown on loan which is pretty good. Apparently only our second ever player to have an afro.

  26. #1526
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    Quote Originally Posted by Adamski View Post
    Division 2
    idk what else to call the second tier of US Soccer bud sorry.

  27. #1527
    Senior Member John's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Reg View Post
    We've got Izzy Brown on loan which is pretty good. Apparently only our second ever player to have an afro.


    Who's curating that list?

  28. #1528
    Bruuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuno Reg's Avatar
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    It was just said jokingly on a fan site, not part of the official signing announcement unfortunately.

  29. #1529
    Senior Member Jimmy Floyd's Avatar
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    Today, Kalas and Jamal Blackman have both signed new four year deals and simultaneously been loaned out to the Championship.

    I'd love to see what sort of golden doorknobs Michael Emenalo has in his house.

  30. #1530
    Senior Member niko_cee's Avatar
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    I know there's an almost limitless amount of shit written at this time of year, but I came across this earlier and was genuinely taken aback by the stupidity of it. I can only assume 'Miguel Delaney' (seriously?) is a poorly programmed bot of some kind.

  31. #1531
    Won the Old Board Lewis's Avatar
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    The twist to it all is that the Chief Football Writer never really had the cash for a weekly shop - until he brought in over half the fee by uncovering the secrets of buying and selling, and conning a living out of the Independent blog (formerly newspaper).

  32. #1532
    I used to be funny.
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    Merino's coming in. More players > less players. Unsure how this season will go with this group.

  33. #1533
    More successful than most Magic's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Reg View Post
    We've got Izzy Brown on loan which is pretty good. Apparently only our second ever player to have an afro.
    Really? What is the point in him, he's never going to make any decent squad so why doesn't he just sign for one of the bottom shite no mark teams?

  34. #1534
    ram it up your shitpipe Giggles's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Magic View Post
    Really? What is the point in him, he's never going to make any decent squad so why doesn't he just sign for one of the bottom shite no mark teams?
    In premier league terms, he just has.

  35. #1535
    More successful than most Magic's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Giggles View Post
    In premier league terms, he just has.
    No he's signed on loan. He'll never ever make Chelsea team so why not just take £7.5m for him?

  36. #1536
    Senior Member niko_cee's Avatar
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    Because if he's half decent for half a season they'll get £48m for him next summer (using the Nathan Ake transfer multiplier).

    Not particularly sure he's what Brighton need, although I've not seen that much of him.

  37. #1537
    Senior Member Jimmy Floyd's Avatar
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    I think we've actually taken it far enough now that we'll keep some of these players on the books throughout their careers and just keep making cash off the loan system (until someone regulates to stop us). Presumably Fulham are paying us more for Kalas than it costs us to keep him fed and watered, so there's no need to sell.

    Emenalo will end up with a Nobel Prize for Economics. A constant stream of 'football income' to dodge FFP and the only catch is you have to do an awkward tweet once a year.

  38. #1538
    Bruuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuno Reg's Avatar
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    What/who do you reckon we need @niko_cee?

    I've got a vague sense that we'll sit deep and get some clean sheets at home, and that getting service to whoever's upfront will be tricky and we'll maybe rely on set pieces. But I'm not sure how best to address that or who would be good to get, or even if sitting deep is Hughton's plan.

  39. #1539
    Senior Member John's Avatar
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    A couple of nippy wingers and a nine footer up front is the standard plan for that sort of thing, isn't it?

  40. #1540
    Bruuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuno Reg's Avatar
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    It would be in the old days but I'm not sure you can do that in the Premier League now. I s'pose Burnley are the closest?

  41. #1541
    DEATH TO THE WEIRD Raoul Duke's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jimmy Floyd View Post
    I think we've actually taken it far enough now that we'll keep some of these players on the books throughout their careers and just keep making cash off the loan system (until someone regulates to stop us). Presumably Fulham are paying us more for Kalas than it costs us to keep him fed and watered, so there's no need to sell.

    Emenalo will end up with a Nobel Prize for Economics. A constant stream of 'football income' to dodge FFP and the only catch is you have to do an awkward tweet once a year.
    It's classic FM tactics. I reckon Mahow might actually be Emenaldo in a Mission Impossible-style mask.

  42. #1542
    Senior Member John's Avatar
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    If it was he wouldn't be able to stop himself calling every club with a player he'd loaned them 'we', so we'd know all about it by now.

  43. #1543
    Senior Member Lofty's Avatar
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    New Barrow AFC signing Donovan Makoma with some interesting footwear...

  44. #1544
    Senior Member Andy's Avatar
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    VvD to Liverpool is a done deal. The club are fuming as apparently he said he wanted to leave at the end of the season but wouldn't kick up a fuss. Then last week he went on strike and forced their hand.

    Bit of a cunts trick just to get a move to Liverpool, he's good enough for any club in Europe, strange he's settled for Liverpool.

  45. #1545
    Senior Member Jimmy Floyd's Avatar
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    His agent probably thinks he can get another onward move from there for another big cut.

  46. #1546
    Senior Member GS's Avatar
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    He'll probably do his cruciate in pre season.

    They'd have been better just buying the club and asset stripping it three years ago. They'd have got better value for money.

  47. #1547
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    Quote Originally Posted by Andy View Post
    he's good enough for any club in Europe, strange he's settled for Liverpool.
    Is he, really?

  48. #1548
    Senior Member John's Avatar
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    He wasn't a particular stand out in the SPL until his second season, three years ago, so he must have progressed incredibly quickly if he is.

  49. #1549
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    Andy massively overrates Southampton's players, it's a continuing theme.

  50. #1550
    Senior Member Andy's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by John View Post
    He wasn't a particular stand out in the SPL until his second season, three years ago, so he must have progressed incredibly quickly if he is.
    He's about to become the most expensive defender in the world.

    Replacing Alderwiereld with VvD was a fantastic bit of business for us. I thought it would be impossible to replace him yet Van Dijk settled straight in and was as good if not better from the off.

    He either improves massively in a quick space as you suggest or just wasn't putting in 100% for Celtic.

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