Next step: no bowlers, only batsmen.
Jason Roy into the team to take the new ball and bat at 11.
Next step: no bowlers, only batsmen.
Jason Roy into the team to take the new ball and bat at 11.
Just speculating how England would have previously responded to a “mystery” spinner ripping one through the gate on the first session. Probably not by increasing the run rate.
I definitely need to experience a tour of Pakistan at some point. In fact, my life goal is to be able to fuck off work and just travel the world watching England play cricket.
How's this clown took four wickets by the way?
Are we getting torn apart by a speccy nerd here?
Baz or no Baz, we're still England.
I've definitely said before but might've been before you were posting again. When my dad worked in Pakistan (over twenty years ago now, for fucks sake) I think he went to a day of a game in Rawalpindi. Not 100% sure of that but he definitely met the majority of the team and a handful of related people such as pundits, etc. in the British Embassy Club in Islamabad.Originally Posted by Ben
His main takeaways were that Gough, Nasser and Gower were top blokes and Botham is a dickhead. None of which is very surprising now but at the time, even not being that into cricket at that point, my dad having met Botham and dismissed him as a bellend was very entertaining.
Not surprised about Botham. His son Liam played in my league for a few years and he's easily one of the biggest cunts I've ever come across.
On the drive in to work I had the Aus-WI commentary on, and it was full of bored Australians going STREWTH! Have you seen the England score, cobber? Getting a wriggle on, aren't they, Bruce?
All as their team mince along at 3.3 an over for two days. Australia now the beta cucks of world cricket. England the snarling alpha males.
This "mystery" kid is bamboozling us. I think we are doing it on purpose just to live up to the English stereotype, because I'm picking the lad from North East England.
I turned the thing on while half asleep earlier to hear Kevin Howells telling me that a 'mystery bowler' had taken five wickets, and my first thought was well why can't somebody find out who he is.
This lad is going to get 10.
For sure he will if Nawaz stays on at the other end anyway. Scrap.
This is mad. 9am and I’m drunk on Bazball again.
Pakistani Jack Leach tearing England apart.
The Stokes shocked face got me. Bamboozled.
I'm sure there was an occasion when Sri Lanka were trying to engineer a 10-for for Murali, and the jobber at the other end took one by mistake. Could see a repeat here.
The jobber was Vaas. Took the 10th by nicking off Henry Olonga (now there's a name).
Murali also got nine at the Oval. Alec Stewart thought fuck that and run himself out. EDIT: In fact, look at this beautiful card. Darren Gough 15 off 133.
The downsides of Bazball: Jack Leach playing reverse sweeps.
The upsides of Bazball: Jimmy Anderson playing reverse sweeps.
This is so great. Bundled out in around 50 overs on day one (unexpected Wood-Anderson stand permitting), still make an OK score, and who cares about all the dogshit dismissals because BAZBALL BABY.
Consequence-free cricket. It's amazing.
I'm sure I just caught a shot of Trescothick in the changing rooms there. How long has he been travelling abroad with the team? It seems witnessing Bazball first-hand even cures homesickness and depression.
Mark Wood
Jimmy should have just got him back on strike there. Denied a late quick fire 50.
I don't think he actually has any shots now other than the reverse sweep.
He'll need to take a few in this dig as I can't see our comedy spin attack doing so.
What's this clown standing around at?
Pitch is doing all sorts and it's only day 1. Lovely stuff.
https://stats.espncricinfo.com/ci/en...s;type=bowling
Test wickets by seamers over 40.
Wood up to 96mph in his first set. No wonder he's always injured.
I think the Pakistani speed guns are a bit like their birth certificates.
49 wickets in 4 matches is some going by SF Barnes.
SF Barnes was a bit of a legend. Played about a year of county cricket total (iirc) because Staffordshire and his local club side paid better. Then just played for England and bowled at the best average in all of history before or since. Also was said to bowl 'fast spin', rather than just one of those, which sounds interesting.
Wasn't expecting to wake up to this match situation.
Once we got Babar they just prodded around. BAZBALL has shown that’s not the way to go these days.
These seamers are really poor. The nerd will be on very soon.
Crawley man
Jacks in at 3 hahaha love this team.
Nasser reckons it’s because Pope has kept and is tired. We only bowled 60 overs though, that’s nothing in professional cricket.
This smells of a Baz-mandated counter attack. If Jacks comes off it doesn’t just take the Pakistan win out of the equation, it gives the lad himself that kick start to really make him feel like he belongs.
That’s what I look like when I try to play the slog sweep.
Wheel of Fortune batting orders are the one. With all the 'plans' teams have nowadays it must blow the opposition's minds.
Conventional wisdom surely dictates even Bazball requires a period of grinding them into the dust here so I fully expect a sporty declaration sometime before the close.
What was the Indian twitter take on us being bundled out by spin in day 1?
These tactics of getting the leg spinner to bowl six feet outside leg stump to Harry Brook are... interesting.
Maybe teams will just take to bowling 40 overs of unplayable shite per innings against England to offset their attempts to move the game along.
Brook played a truly incredible shot through the covers to neuter that VERY leg side line. It's a lot of fun watching him bat.
Yeah, shades of il grande Kevin in a lot of what he does, but without being a massive cock to go with it (as far as I know).
It's slightly surreal to think that England have knocked up 500 runs in two days whilst also casually bowling the other side out in the midst of that, and it all seems very normal.
Sir Joel Wilson.
We played some really quite naff cricket for a large proportion of that match, and still won, away in Pakistan, with a brutally ineffective spinner. Quite impressive really.
Baz 'n Ben will try something extra mental in Karachi now we've got the series in the bag.
Rehan debut
That Stuard Broad story the other day - the one where he was going up to get a coffee, and 'Baz' steamed in to tell him he was in next (at 3 down) because the crowd had gone flat and he wanted to gee them up again - was about as mental as I think it can get, but I'd love them to prove me wrong.
What? Was this the "Nighthawk" day?
I’ve got the Big Bash on in the background and while I admit cricket is the limit of my exposure to Australian culture, it begs the question: is a mullet and/or moustache a prerequisite to retaining one’s citizenship?
Also one of the umpires in this game is a fucking unit.
Ahmed and Foakes in for Anderson and Jacks.
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