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Thread: Christmas 2021

  1. #101
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    It's one of those things everyone who doesn't have it wants, but when you actually do it's not that great if a positive at all.

  2. #102
    Senior Member Lofty's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Manc View Post
    How did your parents tackle the birthday being in close proximity to Christmas? I grew up with a lad who was born on the day and they gave him two sets worth. Severely underperforming in life last I checked.
    I knew a lad the same, except his parents didn't make much of a fuss by all accounts. He was a bit of a prick but still in our friendship group. He was a massive stoner and weirdly homophobic, so one year we hatched a plan and on the day we had a party at my mate's (happened most years). We presented him with a wrapped box. He opened it, the box was a PS4 box. He was made up. Inside the box was not a PS4, it was a bong in the shape of a cock, throbbing veins lovingly scultped etc. He didn't appreciate the joke. Last I checked he was convicted for assualting a neighbour.

    Edit: Oh yeah and cyber stalking a girl we know who turned down his sexual advances, sending her abusive messages from sock puppet accounts.

  3. #103
    Man(c) of the People igor_balis's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Offshore Toon View Post
    Yeah, I'd have guessed a few years older than me (33-35 bracket) but mostly because I associate awkward quirkiness with that indie era of the mid-noughties.
    I'm not awkward or quirky you cunt, but I was fully entrenched in that nme wank 2003-2007ish. I thought the libertines were the best band in the world, what a retard.

  4. #104
    Senior Member Lofty's Avatar
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    At least you didn't drive two hours to see them wearing a Libertines jacket, one of my mates did.

  5. #105
    Man(c) of the People igor_balis's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Manc View Post
    How did your parents tackle the birthday being in close proximity to Christmas? I grew up with a lad who was born on the day and they gave him two sets worth. Severely underperforming in life last I checked.
    It wasn't too bad really, cus there was just about enough time in between. Only child (duh) and single parents, and with Xmas basically being for kids anyway I just got to have two days in 8 days that felt like magical Igor days, except with the latter I had to deal with my mad cunt Alzheimer's ridden Polski grandfather shouting about Jews and that.

    As I've gotten older I actually like where my birthday is, it feels more like having my birthday during the festive period makes it extra class rather than Christmas encroaching on it. Id probably feel differently if it was any closer though.

  6. #106
    Man(c) of the People igor_balis's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lofty View Post
    At least you didn't drive two hours to see them wearing a Libertines jacket, one of my mates did.
    Yeah but I did take part in this

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    Which is probz worse

  7. #107
    Senior Member Spikey M's Avatar
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    Yeah Offy, you cunt.

  8. #108
    Senior Member Offshore Toon's Avatar
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  9. #109
    Man(c) of the People igor_balis's Avatar
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    I'm cool now, promise

  10. #110
    Senior Member SincereTheRebel's Avatar
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    Im off work until January now.
    We had an invasion of women staff over the past year and we played secret Santa for the first time. I got a Yankee candle, and a pack of m&ms from a chick colleague. Better than I expected. I can use my gift. I got someone a hat shaped like a burger because they eat McDonald's every lunch.

  11. #111
    Senior Member Boydy's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by igor_balis View Post
    Yeah but I did take part in this

    Toggle Spoiler


    Which is probz worse

  12. #112
    Senior Member Spikey M's Avatar
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    The reviews are in.

    moonhowlz - 13 years ago

    amazing. excluding the depressing emo girl. god she looks horrible. the rest are awesome, though!!

  13. #113
    Senior Member Offshore Toon's Avatar
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    Were you actually mates with the guy playing Gary or did you have to pay him?

  14. #114
    Senior Member Lofty's Avatar
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    I did wonder that myself

  15. #115
    Senior Member Boydy's Avatar
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    Just logged off until 4th January.

  16. #116
    Man(c) of the People igor_balis's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Offshore Toon View Post
    Were you actually mates with the guy playing Gary or did you have to pay him?
    Toggle Spoiler

    that's ~ 15 years before

    Toggle Spoiler


    here he is ~10 years later with @SincereTheRebel , he's given up drums and is bald now

  17. #117
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    My birthday is the 28th. Think my mum went to great lengths every year to make sure I had separate presents, which I really appreciated because as a kid after the 'Christmas comedown' it was fucking great to think there was only three more days until more presents.

    Birthday parties were always in January though, which was shit. Loved going to the cinema but there was always cock-all on at that time, it's better now obvs. But I do think it's contributed to me not really giving a shit about birthdays (mine and others).

  18. #118
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    Also finished today until the 4th. Already dozed off on the sofa twice

  19. #119
    Senior Member Lofty's Avatar
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    Jammy cunts, I am going to have to work the weekend and then it looks like leave will be cancelled between Christmas and New Year to meet our deadline, perks of the 'manager' grade. Basically going to have to cane the next 7 days so I can get a fighting chance of enjoying the bank holidays without logging on - for work that has to be completed but in reality covid will make moot

  20. #120
    Senior Member Waffdon's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by mo View Post
    Also finished today until the 4th. Already dozed off on the sofa twice
    English schools finish early as fuck

  21. #121
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    Some don't finish until Tuesday, but think they had a two week October half term. But also, don't Scottish schools go back in August? It's a long old term.

  22. #122
    Senior Member Waffdon's Avatar
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    Start half way through August with 2 weeks in October followed by 2 weeks at Christmas and Easter. Usually finish for Summer end of June and get 6 weeks for Summer.

    Think they come off next Thursday at 12 for Christmas. Not sure it’s usually that close, mind.

  23. #123
    Won the Old Board Lewis's Avatar
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    I'm off until the 10th.

  24. #124
    Senior Member Offshore Toon's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by igor_balis View Post
    Toggle Spoiler


    here he is ~10 years later with @SincereTheRebel , he's given up drums and is bald now
    Toggle Spoiler

  25. #125
    Senior Member -james-'s Avatar
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    Landed in Thessaloniki this morning, mum's driving me back from the airport when I get a text from my mate who's house I spent last night in saying that he's tested positive. House is in meltdown.

  26. #126
    Senior Member SincereTheRebel's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by igor_balis View Post
    Toggle Spoiler

    that's ~ 15 years before

    Toggle Spoiler


    here he is ~10 years later with @SincereTheRebel , he's given up drums and is bald now

  27. #127
    Senior Member Spikey M's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by -james- View Post
    Landed in Thessaloniki this morning, mum's driving me back from the airport when I get a text from my mate who's house I spent last night in saying that he's tested positive. House is in meltdown.

  28. #128
    Senior Member Lofty's Avatar
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    Omicron exported to the med by TTH.

  29. #129
    Senior Member Spikey M's Avatar
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  30. #130
    Senior Member Spoonsky's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by -james- View Post
    Landed in Thessaloniki this morning, mum's driving me back from the airport when I get a text from my mate who's house I spent last night in saying that he's tested positive. House is in meltdown.
    My girlfriend's just gone on family holiday to Israel (she's from there) and had a similar thing. Her whole family (her, her sister and the parents) had to test negative before getting on the flight, then they all got tested upon arrival. They spend the entire first day there together, go to bed (her and her sister sharing a bed), then around midnight she gets waken up by her parents telling her that her sister has tested positive.

    /

    Now it's a clusterfuck because the other three are still negative but there's every chance they'll develop it within the next 5 days, so they're just kind of waiting around to start getting symptoms. What a holiday.

  31. #131
    Senior Member Jimmy Floyd's Avatar
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    Had my booster this afternoon, didn't collapse. The nurse told me with some certainty that I wouldn't get side effects. I thought this was a bold call, but she's been right so far.

  32. #132
    Webly Ian's Avatar
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    Yep, I'm feeling fine after my morning booster too. Them folks at Pfizer have done it again.

  33. #133
    Senior Member Pepe's Avatar
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    I forgot my wife's Christmas presents in the US.

  34. #134
    Senior Member Spikey M's Avatar
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  35. #135
    Bookie Sir Andy Mahowry's Avatar
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  36. #136
    Senior Member Spikey M's Avatar
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    Thankfully the French don't hold grudges.

  37. #137
    Senior Member Lofty's Avatar
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    Schoolboy error.

  38. #138
    Won the Old Board Lewis's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Spoonsky View Post
    My girlfriend's just gone on family holiday to Israel (she's from there) and had a similar thing. Her whole family (her, her sister and the parents) had to test negative before getting on the flight, then they all got tested upon arrival. They spend the entire first day there together, go to bed (her and her sister sharing a bed), then around midnight she gets waken up by her parents telling her that her sister has tested positive.

    /

    Now it's a clusterfuck because the other three are still negative but there's every chance they'll develop it within the next 5 days, so they're just kind of waiting around to start getting symptoms. What a holiday.
    The holi-cost.

  39. #139
    Senior Member Pepe's Avatar
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    Worst part is that we are celebrating Christmas today, since I am leaving before the real one, so I don't even have time to go buy something around here. I'll just have to own up to it in front of her family.

  40. #140
    Senior Member Spikey M's Avatar
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    The Mrs is doing the wrapping and has discovered one of my daughters presents has a part missing. I've now got to do a 40 mile round trip to the toy shop we got it from tonight.

    A toy shop 3 days before Christmas? For fuck sake.

  41. #141
    Administrator Kikó's Avatar
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  42. #142
    Senior Member 7om's Avatar
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    Great movie.

  43. #143
    Senior Member Spikey M's Avatar
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    It is. Sadly, in this edition Dementor will be replaced by a legging clad woman called Shanice, that forgot to buy Taylor-Tyler a remote control Paw Patrol character and won't move her saggy cellulite arse from the till until they find one.

  44. #144
    Won the Old Board Lewis's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Spikey M View Post
    The Mrs is doing the wrapping and has discovered one of my daughters presents has a part missing. I've now got to do a 40 mile round trip to the toy shop we got it from tonight.

    A toy shop 3 days before Christmas? For fuck sake.
    Quote Originally Posted by Spikey M View Post
    It is. Sadly, in this edition Dementor will be replaced by a legging clad woman called Shanice, that forgot to buy Taylor-Tyler a remote control Paw Patrol character and won't move her saggy cellulite arse from the till until they find one.
    Alright lad.

  45. #145
    Senior Member Spikey M's Avatar
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    I didn't forget anything and my arse is a peach, tyvm.

    Inb4 "your head is also a peach".

  46. #146
    ram it up your shitpipe Giggles's Avatar
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    I went into town for cards today on the way home from work. Fucking bedlam.

  47. #147
    Bookie Sir Andy Mahowry's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Spikey M View Post
    I didn't forget anything and my arse is a peach, tyvm.

    Inb4 "your head is also a peach".
    That would be foolish, your head is a grape.

  48. #148
    Senior Member Jimmy Floyd's Avatar
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    The worst thing about Christmas in shops, and I'm going to be very specific about this, is old people looking at food. Not buying it. Not putting it in their trollies. Standing in aisles and looking at it. Take the cheese area, for example. In most British supermarkets there will be a cheddar wall, a rubbery Swiss cheese area, and an 'everything else' section. Normally some septuagenarian couple will have a trolley and their withered bodies straddling all three, just looking. I know what I want - Manchego - but I have to wait for them to go on this silent voyage of cheesy discovery before I can get it.

    Eventually she will say to him 'Do we have cheddar at home?' and he will start dribbling and say 'Cheddar cheese, cheddar, cheddar cheese, cheese, cheddar cheese' until the sands of time have slipped sufficiently from their grasp that, pursued by the Reaper himself making a hasty dart from the household goods aisle, they will push the trolley away without taking any cheese at all. 'Chips,' he'll say, 'chips chips, fish and chips, fish, chips, fish and bread rolls chips, newspapers, the Daily Sun newspaper, do you want an ice cream for the grandkids?' and then the Milky Way has had time to merge with Andromeda before these cunts have even made it home. How long must it take them to unpack the shopping?

  49. #149
    Won the Old Board Lewis's Avatar
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    Whenever I go to the butchers I get stuck behind some fossil with a shopping bag asking about/buying the entire shop. What are they? Are they nice? How much are they? What about just four of them? Oh no I'll just... I walk out half the time. I hate queuing more than anything.

  50. #150
    Pretty Much Amazing Mike's Avatar
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    Finished work for Christmas. Only done three days this half term, but still felt good.
    Beer is cooling in the fridge and Mexican food is getting delivered any second now.

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