My mate's first long term girlfriend broke up with him and became a lesbian. His second long term girlfriend broke up with him, revealed she was bi, and slept with the first one. Oof.
My mate's first long term girlfriend broke up with him and became a lesbian. His second long term girlfriend broke up with him, revealed she was bi, and slept with the first one. Oof.
Both. And he's fine, it was years ago. He saw the funny side pretty quickly.
I saw the erotic side.
One of my lesbian (fb) friend's new girlfriend is worthy.
Speaking of which, my fb perving material has decreased considerably in the past few years. I guess women are wising up.
It did that for me yesterday because Spurs were playing Chelsea.
I've already written to Google complaining that their Loch Ness monster isn't depicted as pro-SNP.
I've just found some of those little rubber 3G balls in my fucking fridge. How is that even possible?
The little rubber balls you get on 3G astro-turf pitches.
Well there you go, never knew that existed, I've only ever used the sandy ones.
The get everywhere. It's ridiculous.
It's definitely winter now, lads. I don't normally mind it but I've been fucking freezing the past couple of days. Maybe I'm getting old, but it makes me wish humans were hibernators.
Looks like someone's going to bottle the work do after picking what they want from the menu and then giving us the silent treatment. Something she also did last year. Poor form to not say you're not interested.
Work dos fuck me off. Korean ones are obviously worse as they can handle very little alcohol. It ends up as a constant stream of bullshit toasts to different people in exactly the same three syllable chant format: name-name-name, name-name-name and then a complimentary three syllable adjective about the person. The whole thing is preceded by a declaration that it's time for '*name* Club!'
Last time my adjective was 'smart', which they had absolutely no qualms making into three syllables.
Some of the other ones were lol, 'handsome man' probably the outright winner.
It's actually warming up as a warm front from southern Europe reaches us. Will bring wet and windy weather though.
The meteorologists only use these dates because it's convenient to collect data for full calendar months though. 'Meteorological winter' is bollocks in reality. Proper winter starts at the solstice and ends at spring equinox.
All about the position of the Earth relative to the sun. December is typically autumnal in terms of actual weather. Loads of wind and rain.
It's been windy and rainy for the past couple of weeks here. Today is flat calm but freezing. I had to take the kettle to the windscreen before I could drive this morning.
Equinox? What are you, a fucking Aztec or some shit? Fuck off.
Pouring boiling hot water on to frozen glass, what could go wrong!
A lot, which is why I boiled it before I went in the shower and poured it on lukewarm.
Should have boiled yer heed.
Go have a wank and come back when you've settled down a bit, you pleb.
Though one would imagine you'd use up quite a lot of electricity to get enough boiling water.
Speaking of Christmas Jumpers:
Hate working from home in the winter. Off to Sainsburys to mooch around and use some of their heating.
It's meteorological winter, you dolt, you should have been better prepared.
You can't prepare for it really. I did think about getting fingerless gloves but they don't help that much apparently.
Shop workers faced with a customer buying fingerless gloves should really just treat it as a cry of "will you please end my misery now".
My ex-boss used to wear them, he had arthritis in his hands though so he was knuckleless. Also had a ponytail too. Nailed on paedo.
I wear fingerless gloves. Crochet ones no less.
Was going to order something online last night but their website was unbelievably slow so I went to bed. Now it's out of stock.
I'm a twit
Fucking lol. I've just spent the past 30 minutes trying to get my old photos off Bebo only to find out that it's been dead in the water since October, according to Twitter (I'm just going off tweets to their support, to which there were no replies).
Fuck my life.
5 seconds of googling:
https://www.bebo.com/faq (from 31st Jan, apparently)
Hmm maybe that's old.
Yeah 2014, you smart alec potato picking cunt.
Bowling.
Had 3 games today (120, 125 and then a shocking 81) and my thumb is in absolute agony.
Nudity logic. This thought was triggered by seeing this ridiculous Mail 'story' about Madonna in which they've found some nude pictures of her from 30+ years ago. Not particularly interesting unless historical based wanking is your thing but anyway, what is the problem we have with women's nipples? They look exactly the same as men's nipples, which are seen all the time, and their only extra function is to provide life-giving milk to newborns, a glorious thing. See the below in-no-way-safe-for-work example:
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So every other millimetre of her flesh has been printed and yet somehow a tiny black box over a nipple has preserved her modesty? I don't think so.
Meanwhile this picture, where you can see her arse - which is what poo comes out of - and there is no black box.
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I must have missed something somewhere along the way.
I reckon her actual arsehole would have been blacked out.
Its stupid though, I agree.
One of my neighbours is mowing his lawn right now. At dark. With someone holding a fucking torch for him.
Fucking bellend.
That's the behaviour of a psychopath. You're probably not safe.