Happened to me senior year too. Pissed myself at a friends house after chugging vodka and eating an edible, then i broke my gums on a metal paper napkin dispenser as I was bobbing my head back and forth while sitting at a table, and finished it off by vomming in a toilet. It'll all get better, trust.
Isn't sweating your arse off in a sauna a bad idea when hungover? I mean, you're already dehydrated as fuck as it is.
Is there anything more nauseating that attending your in-laws anniversary 'party' on a fucking Sunday where nobody will be drinking. I also hate how their relationship is everything I hate but they are so happy and in love so it'll be plastered with disgusting photos of 'love' just to remind me how fucking shit my marriage is. I've also made the mistake of listening to The Streets. Just give me a gram and a few Es to liven it up. Dreadful stuff.
So apparently edit on chrome android means delete post. Fucking shit forum.
I'm a spastic.
I have a strong feeling that's a user error.
That problem hasn't happened for ages. Magic really is inept at phones.
I've just hit edit there was lag so I nearly pressed it again and the page loaded on the 'delete post' button. Shit Moto E.
Also Waff is a fucking menace on FB. Just wait until he discovers drugs.
Wait til he discovers something stronger than a west coast cooler.
I had to Google that, but I don't think that's a bad thing considering what it is.
Waff's life seems pretty sweet at the moment. Good on him.
I went frickin' bowling yesterday. Went once or twice as a child, but don't remember it, and went on my mates stag do a few months back and now I honestly hope I never go again. It's not even the fact that I'm rubbish (I am, I guess, but who cares?) it's just tediously dull and boring.
Thankfully the bowling place sold Cobra on draught, which was the only positive. Oh and it was chock-full of chernos.
I'm a twit
I'm enjoying it. It's like rediscovering my youth. Well, not really. But he's a lovely bloke.
Meet! Meet! Meet! Meet!
Lots of young attractive females, whose dad's would probably batter you, go to bowling.
I'm a twit
Also if the night couldn't get any worse I text my mum to see if we could share a taxi (i.e they pay) and she's now not going. She's said we can just share a taxi with my cunt step-father.
Can't wait!
I gave some kids some sweets when I last went bowling, but their dad just laughed because he knew I would have had him.
'If I wanna nonce 'em, mate, I will.'
I got some sweets out of one of the stupid machines they have, but they were crap, so I offered them to the kids on the next lane. Big Society mate.
That is sinister as fuck.
GS levels of weird.
Kids like sweets.
A Magic-Waff meet would be one for the ages.
How can giving sweets to kids be unnacceptable? Some special level of paranoia being hit here. If I'm at a shit seaside town and win loads of those tickets in an arcade I always give them to a kid. What the fuck would I want with them? Do parents think everybody is a paedo until proven otherwise?
Depends if you look like a peado, I'd have thought.
My Dad has just text to see if I want a lift. FML.
Did I mention my mates call me 'Jimmy'?
Are your mates of age?
I do enjoy Magic's weird moral compass. Arbitrarily decrying fairly innocuous stuff as he's wanking off to faces of death videos on liveleak. As his tired wife tries to entertain the kid in the other room.
My country would be fun to live in.
No, you can't fuck children but you can fuck yourself with an abortion as technically it isn't alive yet-ish.
Aha. Talking about your country reminds me of a shit online game called nation states. Your country is determined by answering policy questions every day, i.e. a woman is caught stealing some bread, do you a) send her to prison b) execute her c)send her to a rehabilitation center ETC ETC. It was pretty good fun actually, and you can set your countries up in little regions. Would be a good idea for a tth group activity if it sounded less lame and it was 2007.
I pissed myself at a mates' house once. I wasn't drunk though. We were 12 and we had a competition to see who could drink the most orange squash. I won, but I woke up in the middle of the night having already pissed about a litre all over his bottom bunkbed. Luckily it was so diluted that it was basically water, so as soon as he woke up I 'accidentally' spilled the rest of my undrunk squash onto the bed so that he'd assume all the wetness was due to that.
I remember after a gig one night we went back to the singers gaff and had an awful go at the Buckfast and dope. After going to sleep on the sofa I woke up on his bedroom floor with my kacks round my ankles and had pulled out a drawer of his t-shirts and pissed in it. I still have no recollection but his Da reminds me of it every time I see him to this day.
Another time me and a mate came home after the pub and the next morning I woke up on the kitchen floor and he was asleep bent over the back of the sofa from a standing position. We were living with his Mrs at the time and one of us had pissed on the TV, which promptly blew up, and her DVD player. We dabbed the ceiling with a wet teabag on a stick, and walked down the town to buy her a new one. Told her the ceiling leaked and we rang the landlord and he replaced it. I still maintain I didn't do it but he says he can't remember doing it either.
Pissing yourself at your mates must be the lowest point... I'd never live it down if it happened to me in my circle of mates.
Its surely going to happen by complete accident. I'm out on the piss in his hometown most weekends, literally five minutes walk from his house.
But yeah, my life is pretty good. Pretty drunk Friday, absolutely out of it last night and half cut right now. /i'm back home now, thougH may head back out - BANK HOLIDAY MONDAY, BOIIIIIII.
My Facebook is an absolute state . I'm not really sure how many folk on here I have.
I've never managed to piss myself. But once a few of us went out and ended up absolutely hammered. One of the lads stopped with another of the group and the lad whose house it was got a massive bollocking in the morning when it transpired that his guest had woken his parents up by walking into their bedroom and pissing in the corner, obviously mistaking it for the toilet.
My mate's dog pissed on me when I stayed over once.
That teabag cover is a bit clever.
What are you lot having a bank holiday for?
I remember enjoying getting pissed. A few of us managed an 18 day streak back in the summer of 2006. It was glorious. The only one I'm in touch with still is Lauren.
These days I can't imagine anything worse. Once a month I go out, generally, and even then I have to drag myself out. I think the last proper night out was in September. Might do something next week. Getting old is a fucker.
I've had two of those Duvel bottles and I've got a headache and wobbly vision... Age hits you pretty hard.
St Andrews Day. I'm assuming its a bank holiday, anyway. Council gives you fuck all public holidays.
Does anyone ever wake up during the night needing a pee, but can't be arsed to get out of bed, so you just hold it?
I have done this on several occasions and, whilst i haven't pissed myself, i do worry that this tactic is on the risky side.
My friend once had a party for his shit other mates, and his old man ended up laying somebody out for being sick all over the kitchen.