Depends on how brown you are so Pepe's fucked.Originally Posted by Spikey M
Depends on how brown you are so Pepe's fucked.
I'll carry a camera with me at all times so Magic can wank to the video of my assassination.
You've driven it and didn't realise the windshield was tinted?I could barely see the mirrors when test driving it last night.
EDIT: Didn't even notice that the windshield is tinted too. Who does that?
You sound very safe.
Haven't had an accident in 10+ years. A+ driver.
When did you last have a car?
Please don't get me unnecessarily hard.
11.
He's racked up lawnmower accidents in that time though.
I think the previous one died on October 2016.
Spent seven hours in the car yesterday (had to go renew my passport.) Surprisingly comfortable for such a small car. I am sure someone in the back seat wouldn't agree, but fuck him, he should get his own car. The engine drone is a bit annoying when on the highway for hours, but eventually you get used to it.
Never drove a car that was droning, but I can imagine it being really annoying when the rest of the car is properly quiet.
As if Peps didn’t have Despacito cranked up for his mamacita.
I have never heard that song.
I do know of its existence.
We had the 80s playlist at full blast.
Already had to take it to the dealership to replace a steering shaft. Dat reliability.
I'm a twit
Pretty spot on. Some plastic covers for the usb/aux plugs also broke but I didn't bother asking for them to replace them since they will just break again. The exhaust noise makes up for all of it though.
Just drove home from Bolton and saw a pretty hefty smash on the M62. About ten minutes before it all the cards were queued and moving about 10mph and some dickhead came pelting down the hard shoulder with his hazards on. Then later on I passed him, still going slowly, as he had pulled over on the hard shoulder, still with hazards on. For some reason the driver was now out of the car and round the other side speaking to his passenger through a half open window. I thought nothing of it and carried on.
Next thing that happens is while we’re still all queued, and now more traffic is filtering on from a junction (either 10 or 11, I’d guess), his car appears, undertaking me, then swerving around and pulling in front of a car in the slow lane, then tried to swerve into the middle lane (about four cars in front) but smashes into the back of s car, which then spins around and hits a pickup truck and another car. The guy who caused it was driving like an absolute loon and it made a hell of a noise.
Was weird how clear the motorway suddenly looked, despite all the debris. All four cars involved managed to pull over in the hard shoulder and as I drove off the driver from the main smashed car and from the pickup were running back down the hard shoulder, presumably to go mad at the idiot driver who could’ve easily killed someone.
I just drove off though. What are you supposed to do in that situation? Presumably I had a better view than the three victims because I was behind them all, but I’d never consider stopping and giving a witness statement or anything. Are you supposed to?
I'm a twit
Keep going and don't get involved.
Yes.
Call the Police and tell them what you saw.
Yep.
Say you couldn't stick around but are willing to give a statement now.
This. You're not expected to stop your entire day when it happens but making a phone call hurts no-one and helps everyone else involved.
Bloke concerned will be a general criminal/drug dealer or something.
Undertaking is a proper hazard, it seems to be almost commonplace these days for cunts to just ping down the left when the middle lane is doing less than 80. Should be an instant driving ban.
I remember Alan Shearer the 2nd kicking off on here for someone being 2mph below the speed limit.
Probably more annoying on Scottish roads where sheep are more common than cars.
If there is a left lane and it's empty (assuming you're not talking about an exit filter or hard shoulder) then no cunt should be sitting in the middle anyway, let alone doing 80. That itself should be the instant ban.
You slow cunts should get out the fucking way.
My favourite day on the motorway had to be driving back down from the Midlands and noticing that while we were bombing down it, the other side was like the Walking Dead. No traffic updates had popped up previously so we figured it must have been a pretty horrendous crash as it went on for miles. Only for us to arrive at the sight of he other lane, full of about 50 sheep just running down the middle of the M4(?) flanked by 10 police cars with their lights going and travelling at like 5 miles an hour and this farmer shouting blue murder at them.
Must have been infuriating to be just behind it.
Yep. If you’re being undertaken then most of the time it’s because you’re sat in the wrong lane.
He's the sort of entitled cunt that wouldn't even check his mirrors, and will also wear driving gloves.
Done.
I'm a twit
Seems my dreadful french wreck of a car has some sort of ridiculous electro osmosis problem which causes the windscreen washer pump to direct water through the 'marron' electrical cable and into the fuse box. Washer jets and sidelights disabled.
How easy is it to replace this type of thing? I can get into it, and all the wiring loom connectors look alright (the connector pins on the fuse board have had it though). A new fuse box/board is about £70 so I don't much fancy having a dealer, or mechanic, charge me thousands to fix it really. Think I'd need to replace the water pump thing as well.
I feel like if you have to ask how easy it is you should just get someone who knows what they're doing to do it, like a mechanic. Might void the warranty if you do anything with it as well.
Nah. Google it. There might be a YouTube video of how to do it, depending how common a problem it is. My local garage wanted £110 to replace my broken wing mirror. I did it myself for £25.
Warranty?
I can get a mechanic to do it, but he's a bit of an investigator and will want to waste loads of time 'finding' the problem (he's done it before, nice as he is he's a bit of an autist) which will cost me - that's probably a £500 route depending on whether he accepts my parts or not.
I know if I take it to the dealer they'll quote me £1000+ for a new fuse board, wiring loom and washer pump (combined ebay parts cost about £130) which is just galling seeing as it's a manufacturing/design defect that seems to have been getting moaned about a lot in recent years. Useless french twats.
First things first though I'm going to try and clean the marron plug to see if that makes any difference, the corrosion doesn't look nearly as bad as some examples I've seen online.
Any of you hardwired a dashcam before?
I’ve bought one (won’t link it cos you’re all sarcastic cunts) and hoping I can keep the cigarette lighter free for USB ports.
I'm a twit
I've done it a few times yes.
Find a fuse that comes on with the ignotion.
Plug in one of these:
Toggle Spoiler
Add one of these to the live and take a common from any screw that's into the chassis (something bolting a bit of the underside of the dash on or something).
Toggle Spoiler
I used a double one so I could have a phone charger permanently too. Cut the plug part off and just wire straight.
Find somewhere to tie the socket behind the dash. Mine is under the steering wheel in behind.
Run the cable up the A-pillar (take it off, it'll be much handier) and across the front of the roof lining. I used sticky pad cable tie holders to keep them in.
Result.
.
Last edited by Giggles; 28-03-2018 at 09:43 AM.
Or you could just put one of these into your fag lighter socket so there's one free, but I cannot abide cables strewn around a car.
Cheers.
What’s that second thing in the first post? I understand the top one is a piggyback fuse.
I'm a twit
It's basically the same as the thing in the second post but it has a cable connection instead of all being the one piece. I used one so I could cut the single plug off it and connect the wires straight to the fuse tap.
Okay.
I've watched a few videos on youtube and bought some kit. I'm way out my depth though.
I'm a twit
Just take it in steps. Once you have a fuse picked, then get the connections done and find a place you can cable tie in the 12V socket. That's the worst of it. Just a matter of running the cables up to the camera then.
When you get to that stage, connect the lead int camera and work backwards down to your socket, so you can hide any excess wire too.
If you're really not happy though, send the camera back and buy one at Halfords. Their installation prices aren't bad at all if you're buying the kit off them too.
Lol Volkswagen just sent me a fucking video of their mechanic doing a health check on my car.
I have in interview for a job that has a bit of a commute lined up, and a possible interview for another one that’s closer but still a bit of a trip. I don’t trust my car with either of these long term, and both of the jobs have an increase in wage that mean I’ve no need to risk it.
With that, I need some advice:
I need a family car, nothing too big but 5 doors, reasonable leg room and boot space. Best? Worst? Bonus points for Eco. Cars. Not because I’m green, because of that cash money.
I will also be relying on getting one on lease / credit, as we don’t have £5-10k outright. What’s the best way to go about this? What should I avoid? Best companies to use?
C3 Picasso is mega (well the 2011 style model) if you can overlook the shoddy French engineering and tendency for it to channel water into the electrical parts of the engine bay.
I fixed that by the way. £100 spent on something a dealer would have been charging in the 1000s for. Win.
Get a company car so they pay for your commute.
I’ll see what they say about picking me up in the chairman’s chopper first.
I do like them (assuming they’re not the ones with the plastic panels on the doors). Is the MPG any good? How much is road tax?C3 Picasso is mega (well the 2011 style model) if you can overlook the shoddy French engineering and tendency for it to channel water into the electrical parts of the engine bay.
I fixed that by the way. £100 spent on something a dealer would have been charging in the 1000s for. Win.
Hard to peddle 2 people on a chopper mate.
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