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Thread: U.S. Presidential Election 2016 (Sponsored by Betty Croker's Hamburger Helper)

  1. #7951
    Senior Member Mazuuurk's Avatar
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    Probably not anymore, but they do have some children don't they?

    Then also, you speak of her as if she has integrity which it just feels like that ship has sailed in the first place for her, somehow.

  2. #7952
    Custom User Title phonics's Avatar
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    Melania doesn't exist, she's just a series of body doubles. Elon Musk was on that board of technology to create an AI version of her that would let Donald touch her bits.

  3. #7953
    Senior Member Jimmy Floyd's Avatar
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    She probably went into the marriage hoping for a massive heart attack, or maybe even to slip a quick cyanide in his McFlurry, and instead she's now got 40 secret service agents watching their every move. Pity really.

  4. #7954
    Custom User Title phonics's Avatar
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    That's an interesting tidbit that's popped up lately (maybe from the book?), I thought Trump was just a McDonalds loving slob but apparently it's his way of making sure no-one is poisoning him...

  5. #7955
    Senior Member Boydy's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by phonics View Post
    That's an interesting tidbit that's popped up lately (maybe from the book?), I thought Trump was just a McDonalds loving slob but apparently it's his way of making sure no-one is poisoning him...
    Why couldn't someone poison his McDonalds?

  6. #7956
    Senior Member Boydy's Avatar
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    How did Wolff find out about the gorilla channel bit? Was he there when Trump was watching it?

  7. #7957
    Senior Member Jimmy Floyd's Avatar
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    Yep, disguised as a large chicken selects meal.

  8. #7958
    Custom User Title phonics's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Boydy View Post
    Why couldn't someone poison his McDonalds?
    He sends staffers and they order multiple burgers and he only eats one. It's mental.

  9. #7959
    Senior Member Boydy's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by phonics View Post
    He sends staffers and they order multiple burgers and he only eats one. It's mental.
    You could poison all of them.

  10. #7960
    Senior Member Disco's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by phonics View Post
    He sends staffers and they order multiple burgers and he only eats one. It's mental.
    Foolproof.

  11. #7961
    Custom User Title phonics's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Boydy View Post
    You could poison all of them.
    You'd have to know they were going to Donald and which ones. The man only eats Big Macs, there's like 70 of them slowly thawing on the rack at all times.

  12. #7962
    Better Than You Henry's Avatar
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    So it appears that The President of the United States is going to simulate an "Awards" ceremony for the most dishonest media outlets using his Twitter account. He's finally sunk to the level of the TTH Awards.

  13. #7963
    Custom User Title phonics's Avatar
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    Looking up the details, turns out that it was in fact in the book so he's probably just a fat slob like the rest of us.

  14. #7964
    Custom User Title phonics's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Henry View Post
    So it appears that The President of the United States is going to simulate an "Awards" ceremony for the most dishonest media outlets using his Twitter account. He's finally sunk to the level of the TTH Awards.
    Hope they're better at counting votes than igor.

  15. #7965
    Won the Old Board Lewis's Avatar
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    Those awards were lol enough, but then people started pretending they wanted to win in case they won.

  16. #7966
    Senior Member Pepe's Avatar
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    Should probably give the award to the FAILING NY Times.

  17. #7967
    Senior Member Disco's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by phonics View Post
    Hope they're better at counting votes than igor.
    I know who I'd rather give access to a nuclear arsenal.

  18. #7968
    DEATH TO THE WEIRD Raoul Duke's Avatar
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    Wikileaks (which is definitely not an arm of Pravda) has leaked the book, if anyone wants to have a butcher's.

  19. #7969
    DEATH TO THE WEIRD Raoul Duke's Avatar
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    Steve Bannon is out at Breitbart: https://www.axios.com/bannon-steps-d...9eacdbb35.html

    The rats are eating each other whilst the ship sinks

  20. #7970
    Senior Member Boydy's Avatar
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    US to loosen nuclear weapons constraints and develop more 'usable' warheads

    https://www.theguardian.com/us-news/...y_to_clipboard

    Oh great.

  21. #7971
    Won the Old Board Lewis's Avatar
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    Policy reviews get all the divs out of the woodwork trying to sneak pointless shit in under the radar. Back when men were men and every nuclear option was properly explored (such as the chicken-powered atomic landmine) it was chemical weapons, and now it appears to be this.

  22. #7972
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    I can’t quite put my finger on why Trump assumes that immigrants from Haiti, Mexico, or Ghana must be undesirable uneducated people from shithole countries in a way the extremely technically skilled catalogue model mothers of his children from Slovenia or the Czech Republic are not. What could it be?

  23. #7973
    Romulus Augustulus ItalAussie's Avatar
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    Ignoring the obvious, I found it amusing that he wanted immigrants from places like Norway.

    Places like Norway have a better standard of living than the US, you dumbass.

  24. #7974
    Better Than You Henry's Avatar
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    He's trying to shut down the government over BUILD THE WALL too, is he not?

  25. #7975
    Administrator Kikó's Avatar
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    At least it's only another 3 years.

  26. #7976
    Senior Member Spikey M's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ItalAussie View Post
    Ignoring the obvious, I found it amusing that he wanted immigrants from places like Norway.

    Places like Norway have a better standard of living than the US, you dumbass.
    Given the choice between Detroit, Baltimore, and the shitty parts of LA, Chicago and New York and the ‘Shitholes’ he took a shot at... I don’t think there’s a lot in it.

    I imagine I’m less likely to get shot by both criminals and the fucking police in Haiti.

  27. #7977
    Senior Member Pepe's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ItalAussie View Post
    Places like Norway have a better standard of living than the US, you dumbass.
    That'll change once Oprah takes over.

  28. #7978
    Won the Old Board Lewis's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Kikó View Post
    At least it's only another 3 years.
    Seven.

  29. #7979
    Senior Member Disco's Avatar
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    Let's be fair though, he's not wrong, any country that elected him to office is desperately in need of more intelligent people.

  30. #7980
    Senior Member Pepe's Avatar
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    And those 'intelligent people' can only come from Norway and not from the 'shitholes?'

    https://www.bloomberg.com/view/artic...-and-brightest

    One of the most striking facts about immigration to the U.S., unbeknownst even to many immigration advocates, is the superior education of Africans coming to this country. If we consider adults age 25 or older, born in Africa and living in the U.S., 41.7 of them have a bachelor’s degree or more, according to 2009 data. For contrast, the native-born population has a bachelor’s degree or more at the much lower rate of only 28.1 percent in these estimates, and foreign-born adults as a whole have a college degree at the rate of 26.8 percent, both well below the African rate.
    Economist Edward Lazear suggests a simple experiment. Consider immigrants to the U.S. from Algeria, Israel and Japan, and rank them in order of most educated to least educated. The correct answer is Algeria, Israel then Japan. Although that’s counterintuitive at first glance, it’s easy enough to see how it works. If you are Algerian and educated, or aspire to be educated, your prospects in Algeria are relatively poor and you may seek to leave. A talented, educated person in Japan or Israel can do just fine by staying at home. These kinds of considerations explain about 73 percent of the variation in the educational outcomes of migrants.

  31. #7981
    Senior Member Pepe's Avatar
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    My favorite chimpout regarding the Trump thing comes from Rod Dreher, who is seething because Trump rather take religious-less Norwegians over the devout Catholics coming from El Salvador and Haiti.

  32. #7982
    Won the Old Board Lewis's Avatar
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    Using 'African' in any immigration context must be the most pointless exercise imaginable. West Africans yes mate. North Africans no thanks.

  33. #7983
    Senior Member Pepe's Avatar
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    Same thing can be said about 'Asians.'

  34. #7984
    Won the Old Board Lewis's Avatar
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    With all this in mind sticking to shithole/non-shithole seems like the safest bet.

  35. #7985
    Senior Member Spikey M's Avatar
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    Which is fine, but America goes largely on the shithole list.

  36. #7986
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    This is what it looks like when they fuck up the National Warning System in the US. Mistake in testing the new additions in Hawaii today:

    https://mobile.twitter.com/bubbaprog...221888/video/1

  37. #7987
    More successful than most Magic's Avatar
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    Must be blocked or deleted?

  38. #7988
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    Looks like they deleted it. We get them for Amber alerts for missing kids or natural disasters. This one was “there is an incoming ballistic missile” to every smartphone and television in Hawaii.

  39. #7989
    Better Than You Henry's Avatar
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    North Korean media are about to report that the glorious leader has destroyed, in one decisive strike, all of Hawaii; and that while Western media quickly tried to cover with a ludicrous story about a false alarm, the push notes and these here photographs of the craters prove the fact. Which will prompt Trump to swear quick retaliation.

  40. #7990
    I used to be funny.
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    "Hawaii was on my shithole list." - D. Trump.

  41. #7991
    Senior Member niko_cee's Avatar
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    (alleged) Birthplace of Barry O, so almost certainly on (the) Donald's (s)hit list.

  42. #7992
    I used to be funny.
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    "Last in, first out." and then he pushes his BIGGER BUTTON.

  43. #7993
    Custom User Title phonics's Avatar
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    Dear Donald,

    Your denial would sound a bit better if you weren't claiming to be 'The least racist person you'll ever interview'. Just a smidge of humility would make him one of the most effective Republican presidents of all time.

  44. #7994
    Custom User Title phonics's Avatar
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    We're so used to bonkers stories about Trump coming out that not only did he have an affair with a porn star that he paid 130k of hush money to, she said (priror to the payment) he asked her to spank him with a copy of Forbes magazine with his face on it and it's not even a B-tier story.

    Every other line of this story is something else nuts.


  45. #7995
    Senior Member Boydy's Avatar
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    That fucking Gorilla Channel thing wasn't that far off the mark.

  46. #7996
    Custom User Title phonics's Avatar
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    The last one is so good. Like he read (lol) 'So long and thanks for all the fish" and took it literally.

  47. #7997
    Senior Member Pepe's Avatar
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    I thought it was gorillas.

  48. #7998
    Senior Member Disco's Avatar
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    Fucking hell He really is just a four year old in a suit (with a big tie).

  49. #7999
    Senior Member John's Avatar
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    The worst part of the Stormy Daniels thing is that he apparently told her she reminded him of his daughter, while he was fucking her.

  50. #8000
    Won the Old Board Lewis's Avatar
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    Elsewhere, this MEMO sounds good.

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