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Thread: The All New, All Shit, Relationship Thread

  1. #3251
    Senior Member Spikey M's Avatar
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    What's this stuff with Mellin?

  2. #3252
    Bookie Sir Andy Mahowry's Avatar
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    I'm stumped and never liked connecting dots.

  3. #3253
    Senior Member Disco's Avatar
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    Half of us have missed the crucial dot is what's happened.

  4. #3254
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    How dare you all be confused. How dare you.

  5. #3255
    Won the Old Board Lewis's Avatar
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  6. #3256
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    Magic, it seems like the only way you will leave her is if you come home and another man is asleep in your bed, but judging by this thread, it sounds like all you would do is tuck him in.

  7. #3257
    More successful than most Magic's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Cheddar View Post
    Magic, it seems like the only way you will leave her is if you come home and another man is asleep in your bed, but judging by this thread, it sounds like all you would do is tuck him in.

  8. #3258
    Senior Member Adamski's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lewis View Post
    Decent.

  9. #3259
    Yayifications! Yaysus's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Pen View Post
    I'm sure mert will call you when he's out of Belgium and has fixed his phone.

  10. #3260
    Senior Member Spoonsky's Avatar
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    My best friend and I have gotten involved with twins. God help us all.

  11. #3261
    Administrator Kikó's Avatar
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    Link.

  12. #3262
    Senior Member Lofty's Avatar
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    Play swapsies.

    I cannot give an accurate accounting of my total regarding women as I was in various states of inebriation for a lot of it and it depends what we're counting: a bit of fingering and cumming on the tits? Dick in the mouth but nothing else? It's hard to quantify.

  13. #3263
    Senior Member mugbull's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Spoonsky View Post
    My best friend and I have gotten involved with twins. God help us all.
    Get them to 69 each other. Some MC Escher shit, you won't wanna miss that.

  14. #3264
    Senior Member Offshore Toon's Avatar
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    A year and a half ago I predicted that Girl would end up going out with her (relatively new) porko (girl) friend. This prediction was based on the porko being extremely influential in the demise of our relationship and her having no hope in finding a boyfriend due to shagging 200 boys by 18 (reputations last a very long time in Jersey), plus Girl being a lesbian before she met me. I could sense there was some form of emotional blackmail too, but at the same time felt I may just be looking into things too much. However, you can only imagine the mental issues attached to somebody who works their way through that many blokes (unsurprisingly she didn't know her father). Anyway, when I told Girl about my prediction she laughed and said it'd never happen. Tonight I was chatting to Girl because her bearded dragon died and I thought I'd ask if she was going out with the porko yet (my mate said he saw her holding hands with a girl). She is indeed now going out with the porko. Whilst it's rather funny, I'm slightly worried. The porko made up lies about me whilst I was with Girl, got Girl into regular drug use (speed of all things) and was already very controlling. I didn't want to get into it with her tonight because ultimately I'm not in a position to comment anymore, but ffs. I can only hope the porko has changed now that she's got what she was looking for, but Girl is too nice and too naive for this.

    I assume the general advice is to stay out of it?

  15. #3265
    Senior Member Queenslander's Avatar
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    I think being the ex boyfriend your advice no matter how caring it may be will be tainted. Sorry mate.

  16. #3266
    Senior Member Offshore Toon's Avatar
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    Aye, plus I imagine the porko has already set up several lines of defence for this exact scenario.

  17. #3267
    Senior Member 7om's Avatar
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    I wouldn't worry about it, Offy. If the posioning was going on while you were together then you'd be compelled to step in but I'd steer clear, personally. She may be naive, but people have to run their own lives at some point. Like you said, the other girl has probably got all the excuses and defenses in early doors to stop any involvement from you. Probably not worth the hassle.

  18. #3268
    Now in technicolor Pen's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Yaysus View Post
    Sounded like the other side of the story Mert posted a bit earlier in the thread.

  19. #3269
    More successful than most Magic's Avatar
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    I want to know more about her 'bearded dragon'.

  20. #3270
    Senior Member Offshore Toon's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Magic View Post
    I want to know more about her 'bearded dragon'.
    They'd thought it was male but found out it was female when they took it to the vet recently.

  21. #3271
    More successful than most Magic's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Offshore Toon View Post
    They'd thought it was male but found out it was female when they took it to the vet recently.
    Fucking LBGT lizards.

  22. #3272
    Yayifications! Yaysus's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Pen View Post
    Sounded like the other side of the story Mert posted a bit earlier in the thread.
    jesus christ no, I don't even read his posts
    mert is fucking vile

  23. #3273
    Bookie Sir Andy Mahowry's Avatar
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    As if a woman could resist him.

  24. #3274
    Senior Member Offshore Toon's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Magic View Post
    Fucking LBGT lizards.
    Aye, she didnae laugh when I called it a tranny.

  25. #3275
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    If you're 28 would you date an 18 year old if she's "like super mature tho"?

  26. #3276
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    No, because she won't be.

  27. #3277
    Senior Member Offshore Toon's Avatar
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    The age difference will come into play at some stage so don't bother if you're looking for something long term.

  28. #3278
    Won the Old Board Lewis's Avatar
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    What if you just started acting more immature?

  29. #3279
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    Yeaaaaaa I thought the same thing but my other friends are all "oh you big fag herp derp you better hit that shit bro!" so I figured I'd ask my internet friends.

  30. #3280
    Senior Member Spikey M's Avatar
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    Hit that shit bro

  31. #3281
    Bookie Sir Andy Mahowry's Avatar
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    420 blaze it.

  32. #3282
    Senior Member Offshore Toon's Avatar
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    Smack her senseless, breh

  33. #3283
    Senior Member Spikey M's Avatar
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    Tell her her pet is a woman

  34. #3284
    Senior Member randomlegend's Avatar
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    Take her out for a nice dinner and hold her hand

  35. #3285
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    That would be swell

  36. #3286
    Senior Member Spikey M's Avatar
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    Don't use the word swell you square

  37. #3287
    Senior Member mugbull's Avatar
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    BrooNaldo ur in need of all the puss you can get

  38. #3288
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    Play it cool.

  39. #3289
    Man(c) of the People igor_balis's Avatar
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    I'd fuck her but not go out with her.

  40. #3290
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    Why not buy her some flowers? The thought will go a long way.

  41. #3291
    Senior Member Spikey M's Avatar
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    Be better off buying her a skipping rope the fucking nonce.

  42. #3292
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    Cool.

  43. #3293
    Senior Member Spoonsky's Avatar
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    A girl in my grade (so she's 19) has been going out with a guy who must be 27 now for at least two or three years. They seem to make it work, though the difference is slightly less.

  44. #3294
    DEATH TO THE WEIRD Raoul Duke's Avatar
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    Show her your bearded dragon at the very least

  45. #3295
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    Here I thought I was going to get decent advice on the subject.

  46. #3296
    Senior Member John's Avatar
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    I know a guy in his mid thirties who's going out with a girl of twenty one. Nothing particularly wrong about the age gap, but he's friendly with her dad and had been going to his house to watch Celtic games for years, so he's known her since she was a child. Properly creepy.

  47. #3297
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    Oh ya fuck that I just met her at college. I'm going back to finish, she's just starting...ended up in the same class.

    Ya I don't know.

  48. #3298
    Senior Member Spikey M's Avatar
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    At the age of 18 10 years is a big deal to me. It's less of a gap than the noncey 20 year old blokes that date the 15 year olds in their last year of school. She's a kid, especially in your country.

  49. #3299
    More successful than most Magic's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by bruhnaldo View Post
    If you're 28 would you date an 18 year old if she's "like super mature tho"?
    Your mental age is 8 so I'm sure she's on a similar forum asking if she should bone the big dumb retard that flunked life skills class.

  50. #3300
    Senior Member 7om's Avatar
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    Rob Kardashian is having the meltdown of all meltdowns on Twitter right now. Blac Chyna nudes been posted and everything. Brutal.

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